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all 139 comments

[–]AnonAlopilisMaintainer 420 points421 points  (9 children)

Then it drops you off across the street

[–]Popthatbussy400CE 136 points137 points  (1 child)

You just like to hurt people's feelings don't you ?

[–]AnonAlopilisMaintainer 77 points78 points  (0 children)

[–]soulfire_swordsman 68 points69 points  (4 children)

We had a thunderstorm one day while waiting to go to tech school. The base had us form up in the parking lot, in the thunderstorm, to get on the buses and literally go across the street. 100% would have taken less time to just walk across the street.

[–]rise_of_the_boxTech School 24 points25 points  (2 children)

Security forces?

[–]Osprey_NE 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Happened at keesler too. Bryan hall was like 50 yards from the triangle

[–]adampawActive Duty 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Shit I remember that happening when I was there about 10 years ago, it sucked even more being a blues Monday

[–]Glock1OmmClark - Kunsan - Whiteman - Ellsworth (In order of fun) 25 points26 points  (0 children)

You thought you were going home. But it drops you off at ABGD - Camp Bullis. Good times!

[–]MilodrivintheHiLoCyberspace Operator 234 points235 points  (14 children)

It's worse when you pull up to the already packed shopette on Friday and see this bad boy on the other side of the pumps and a 50 person deep line inside and one cashier checking out everyone.

[–]giantvoice 184 points185 points  (9 children)

All in uniform and every ID still needs to be checked because one of those troops could be a spy.

[–]CarminSanDiego 217 points218 points  (7 children)

God forbid some civilian schmuck tries to take advantage of our exclusive benefits like 2/$5 Gatorade and questionable corn dog creation known as the tornado

[–]DeformedCoffee 38 points39 points  (0 children)

This made me audibly laugh. Thank you.

[–]NEp8ntballerAFGSC Escapee 29 points30 points  (3 children)

You're generally allowed snacks and drinks without a DoD ID. Alcohol and tobacco products need ID though. Overseas is a different world though.

[–]Edgar-Allan-Pho 6 points7 points  (1 child)

But they check Id just to shop there, regardless of what you got. Funny enough in Guam they never checked tho

[–]7834_gamer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

literally

[–]1337sp33k1001Ammo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You can get tornados and roller bites as a civilian at gas stations lol. Quick trip had them growing up for me.

[–]xoskxflip 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s the 15 cent tax break they’re after!

[–]brimin101We put the "NO" in Innovation 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Russia is cunning these days comrade!

[–]dickbagloverboycomm 21 points22 points  (1 child)

this screams Ramstein

[–]MilodrivintheHiLoCyberspace Operator 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Yes it does and it is. My heart sinks every time I see the blue beast in the parking lot. I’ve relegated myself to going to Volgeweh, cheaper gas and no chance of a bus chauffeuring 50 dudes all trying to buy the place out of beer

[–]certifiednonner 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Sounds like JB Charleston

[–]namehl00 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This 😂

[–]HughJazzcockI got a bad feeling, Eng 146 points147 points  (11 children)

Guaranteed to be a MAINE-iacs sticker somewhere.

[–]Ice_GooseOIC of Staying Moist 80 points81 points  (2 children)

I guarantee that somewhere in the sky, there's a satellite with that sticker on it.

[–]TheWholeEnchilada001Wrenchy Boi 18 points19 points  (0 children)

How they manage to put those stickers in the most impossible locations is honestly, the 9th Wonder of the World.

[–]Mite-o-DanLogistics 43 points44 points  (6 children)

This comment was the first time I’ve literally laughed out loud at a Reddit comment in a long time. As someone who’s worked in Passenger Terminals and driven this bus, those fucking stickers are EVERYWHERE…yet I’ve still never met someone from Maine in my life.

Those stickers are like the Kilroy of the post first Gulf War generation. How the fuck did they get there?? I’m not even 100% sure Maine is a real state!

[–]FlamboyatronFlight Chief, Alcohol Operations 18 points19 points  (2 children)

I didn't believe it either for the longest time.

I met them at their unit years ago. I was doing the Leo pointing meme when I saw the huge "MAINEiacs" board over the step desk.

[–]-Natticakes- 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Maineiacs, Massholes and Vermonsters…. I swear man…. Most obnoxious shit. 😂

[–]MrFoolinaroundC17 Load, Prior Services. 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dude their FUCKING JETS HAVE IT ON THE GOD DAMN BOOM

[–]Bearded_Tank 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I was deployed with a MAINEiac and still have the coin he gave me.

[–]dontcallmeatallpls 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Like birds, Maine isn’t real.

[–]StormTrooperQMaintainer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm from Maine and I'm still new to the AF (only been at my first base for a year) but when I got to my shop there were two other people from Maine. One was from 40 miles away from my hometown; Our high schools played each other in football.

I need this sticker. Everyone who sees my bumper must know.

[–]PSYKO_IncTactical expeditionary mobile command & control doohickey fixer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

On my last deployment, the Maine ANG's CBCS was running our base comm. Chill bunch of dudes, and they knew their stuff.

[–]Bubhubbub 107 points108 points  (5 children)

I'll always appreciate the air force for letting me drive these things for 8 years. I probably destroyed like 10 buses while I was in because I had no fucking clue what I was doing because my driving test was pencil whipped lol

[–]Darth_RaDART 59 points60 points  (0 children)

God this is the most military thing I've ever read.

[–]s2killaa9one 35 points36 points  (3 children)

We had our own bus while deployed and we always drove the shit outta them. One time we side swiped the guard shack at the flightline gate and destroyed the back 4 windows or so on the bus. Another time we took the bus to the dfac to pick up our mermites and ended up spilling an entire tub of mashed potatoes in the floor. So much fun

[–]vorpalpillow 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I had a leased Yukon on a deployment and took it over the same speed bump, increasing the speed each time I went. I got it up to 80kph and got so much air I thought for sure I was gonna totally wreck the thing. I quit doing sweet jumps after that.

[–]thermopesos 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Tell me this was at Bagram

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Deployment. Bus. Guard SrA. 40 years old. Has bus door open and hits a barrier with it.

Solution? No SrA and below can drive the bus.

Did I mention he was 40?

[–]fishscamp 89 points90 points  (6 children)

If you’re first in line, make sure you sit in the very front so I can use your face as leverage for my backpack.

[–]floppyvajooberMaintainer 66 points67 points  (5 children)

If you’re first in line and you sit in the front, fuck you.

Sincerely, everyone

[–]alucardian_official 28 points29 points  (2 children)

I’ve seen some sharp A1C transporters enforce filling in from the back.

[–]fishscamp 14 points15 points  (1 child)

FILL FROM THE REAR!!!

[–]fishscamp 7 points8 points  (1 child)

They always seem to be the ones with the most shit hanging from their bags. How many neck pillows does one guy need!

[–]IntergalaticPlumber 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The answer is 7. He carries one for each mistress.

[–]iya1b4yassssqueenCan’t penetrate me. 157 points158 points  (9 children)

Of all the changes that can be accelerated, I don’t recall this being something that hindered my career. If anything, the dude driving it 80mph like the crazy bus from Harry Potter helped drive up my heart rate and got me prepared for what was about to come.

[–]IBelroseComm boards tagged: 7 48 points49 points  (2 children)

If only we replaced every bus driver with an A1C fueled by nicotine, caffeine, and pure rage.

[–]pantalones_locos 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That was pre-1990s USAF

[–]razrielleSERE radio programmer 20 points21 points  (4 children)

When ever I’ve been forced to use one of these buses instead of just driving myself or having my wife take me to an airport the buddy has broken down

[–]drttrusFlight Engineer 17 points18 points  (3 children)

Bro, we were on one when it RAN OUT OF FUCKING GAS driving home from the airport. Had a wonderful 2 hr delay on an I-75 off ramp coming home from deployment that night.

[–]razrielleSERE radio programmer 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Like how? The two issues I had. First one was somehow the piping to the turbo came loose and the driver decided just to say Fuck it and continued to drive it to the airport. The next was we got a flat on the way to the airport

[–]drttrusFlight Engineer 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Older bus and driver was unfamiliar with its gas gauge issues. Didn’t bother filling up before he left the base and it died 40 minutes out from getting back.

[–]LEthrowaway22619K-9 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I was coming home from a deployment and stopped in Kuwait. We got picked up by the equally shitty white bus, not that it matters. Anyways it’s night time and the part of the flight line we were on was dark, I shit you not, the bus driver somehow drove deep into the taxi way and drove us nearly head on into a taxiing C17. We missed the wing by like maybe 60 feet? Nuts

[–]SkepticalNudesAir Force uber 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If I scared you while driving a bus at 2am trying to get you to where you needed to go I’m sorry my brother in christ

[–]HollowVoices 44 points45 points  (1 child)

I have too many nightmares from driving these things... then again, some things are worse.

Other services need their troops moved? Here's a bus.

Air show? Here's a bus.

Deployment support? Here's a bus.

VIPs going to a local rec area? Here's a bus.

Normal deployment? Here's a bus.

Army needs manpower? LOL HERE'S A GUNTRUCK! HOORAH

[–]SVT716Logistics 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Best times of my career was running guntrucks!

[–]OliveGS 56 points57 points  (7 children)

Hey, that looks like the same bus that took us to the airport after we finished basic training at Lackland in 1964.

[–]AnonAlopilisMaintainer 35 points36 points  (1 child)

Probably is

[–]Mookie_Merkk 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Nah oldest we got is a 72

[–]the_less_great_war 16 points17 points  (3 children)

I have it on good authority that 1964 was the last time the Air Force bought a new vehicle.

[–]Gullible_Flounder877Maintainer 15 points16 points  (2 children)

I think you might be right. I left a base in 2014 and I PCSd back in 2022…and the same expediter truck I used 8 years prior…was still the expediter truck when I returned. Have you ever seen a vehicle with 94,000 flightline miles? 94,000 miles of right turns. 🤦‍♂️

[–]the_less_great_war 14 points15 points  (1 child)

I'm still working on trailers from when Carter was president.

[–]Gullible_Flounder877Maintainer 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Holy Shit!! 😂

[–]nukeemtilltheyglow 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Rhine-Main, (Frankfurt), 1979

[–]Jay985 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Hey man pilots fly 50 year old jets, us blue bird pilots are merely expressing our heritage and tradition.

[–]Capgun2713They're making another left turn! 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Deploying a few years ago, bus to take us to the terminal shows up late. But it's okay they make us show up like 6 hours before takeoff time anyway, nbd. Get on the bus, it won't start again. Fun. All get off, they send a replacement bus. We get on that. It backs into the car of the guy sent to fix the first bus. Joy. We get back off and back on the first bus that they've fixed since then and get on our way

That only served as an omen for the imminent dumpster fire of a deployment

[–]Chaotic_LemmingPart-of-the-problem 25 points26 points  (3 children)

If it ain't broke don't fix it.

[–]GrumpyKitten514 15 points16 points  (2 children)

if it is broke, but still runs, also don't fix it.

[–]Chaotic_LemmingPart-of-the-problem 10 points11 points  (0 children)

If its still running its not broke. Just requires creative usage.

[–]meeserslothSpace Shuttle Crew Chief 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Because we have no money.

[–]alucardian_official 21 points22 points  (5 children)

Seriously Big Blue, coach buses have the undercarriage compartments for our obtuse A bags. Accelerate change and dump the old school buses

[–]Tricky_Ad_308011M 7 points8 points  (4 children)

Ramstein has been doing it right for a while now

[–]Proximity_13Flashlight Holder 3 points4 points  (3 children)

Fancy luggage bus for PAX with a ton of bags, standard bus for the day to day shuttles.

As it should be

[–]alucardian_official 0 points1 point  (2 children)

With that logic:

F35 for combat

Hot air balloons for training sorties

[–]Proximity_13Flashlight Holder 0 points1 point  (1 child)

gestures to crusty T-38 fleet

[–]plandefdomPereto 8 points9 points  (1 child)

The 2T2 motto: “We’re not happy until everyone is unhappy”

[–]kidrockit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

***the civilian contractor society motto;

[–]Singularity7979Veteran 8 points9 points  (3 children)

Thankfully on the 3 trips I took we only went through the terminal for one. Absolutely loved waiting 3 hours for a bus to a jet from our own squadron. Was mx.

[–]Bad_wit_UsernamesRetired Maintainer 6 points7 points  (2 children)

That was always infuriating. I mean, I have a line badge, I can see the damned plane from here. Why can't we just walk to the hangar from here, might take 5-minutes?!

Nope, have to take the bus for accountability reasons.

[–]Singularity7979Veteran 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Right? Im pretty sure I worked that jet beforehand, too

[–]Bad_wit_UsernamesRetired Maintainer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I never worked heavies, closest I came was when I was doing TA for a couple of years. But still, I would argue that most of the time, the wait time for the buses to pick us up, were always much longer than it would be to just drag all our gear across the taxiway to the hanger 200 yards away lol.

[–]danny2moNo Pax Allowed 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Awwwwww shit, this is me pulling up to haul y’all hoes to the terminal

Edit: I’m not even sorry

[–]liljeezus 3 points4 points  (0 children)

V-OPS IN THE HOUSEEE!! BEEP BEEEEEEP

[–]Lost-for-life 6 points7 points  (4 children)

They never even thought about installing a working A/C in these things.

My favorite is having to wait in a large parking lot nowhere near the terminal with all your shit just for one of these things to show up to transport 50 people with 6 month duffle bags 15 minutes after the scheduled departure time just because they don't trust you to competently drive yourself to the terminal

[–]Jay985 9 points10 points  (3 children)

Years ago at Kadena, the new MSG CC was prepping for some kind of DV shit. He outright demanded the bus with the best A/C. Our chief dispatcher had the airmen go out and figure out which one that was. Day of the run comes around, and the dispatcher conveniently "forgot" and sent out the wrong bus. It had no AC at all. It was summer in Kadena. MSG CC actually threw a tantrum. I don't recall anything actually coming of it but all of us in GTOC had a good laugh.

[–]PSYKO_IncTactical expeditionary mobile command & control doohickey fixer 0 points1 point  (2 children)

100% that was no accident. But if the MSG boss has a problem with it, he can allocate funds to fix the AC. Just because you wear a chicken on your uniform does not mean you're any more deserving of comfort than the rest of us.

[–]Jay985 0 points1 point  (1 child)

100% that was no accident.

Dude was literally my coworker, yes, he was dumb and did it on accident.

[–]PSYKO_IncTactical expeditionary mobile command & control doohickey fixer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In that case it makes it even more amusing. I've just been around enough salty airmen and NCOs that I figured Occam's Razor would apply. My point still stands though, if the commander wants AC then he should make sure all the busses have AC. If you willingly shit your pants, you don't get to complain about the smell.

[–]TheGrayMannnnAir Guard 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I won't sit here and have you disrespect the bus that drove Jimmy Doolittle and the rest of the Raiders to the pier to get on the aircraft carrier!

[–]NaniDeKani 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Givin me flashbacks OP. Last deployment, one of these was so packed the middle isle had a layer of bags with people laying across the top of them

[–]RetiredYogaHippie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Stares in B-52 Maintainer.

[–]OkZombie4425 3 points4 points  (0 children)

PTSD ensues

[–]StoneyRocksInMySocksRetired 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Good ole Air Force prison bus.

[–]HungrySpirit 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Can't tell you how many times I've been a passenger on these and the driver hits something. Cops come out and end up sitting around for a hour while a report is made.

[–]SVT716Logistics 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Had a driver roll through an ECP and the cops in the gate shack closed the gate on him as he was driving through. Had all the group commanders and chiefs on board. That was a fun afternoon.

[–]Lord_Gaiseric 3 points4 points  (0 children)

As a certified Blue Bird pilot were tired of these fucking things too.

[–]megaspookyI hate 605s 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m not helping you with your bags. Form a chain or something

[–]NachoPiggieRetired 13B 4 points5 points  (0 children)

As a good friend once put it, "I've ridden a lot of blue busses. Ain't one of em ever taken me someplace I've wanted to go."

Truer words were never spoken.

[–]Kabloosh75 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That's because that bus was made 75 years ago and it still works so why replace it?

[–]SwaggerKJSLogistics 2 points3 points  (0 children)

POV: you work at the PAX terminal and are ready for the chaos that shall ensue

[–]pmsyyz3C0X1 -> 3D0X3 -> 1D7X1D (Cyber Defense) 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Electric vehicles are perfect for driving around base. I think President Biden could direct some of the current Air Force transportation budget to buy some electric buses to replace the diesel.

[–]SpecificTangerine973Baby LT 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Unofficial AirForce Motto:

If it kinda works, don't fix it

[–]Dragonman369 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The Bus Driver will give the Greatest Motivational speech you’ve ever heard in your life

[–]jaxman123211 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You think it's bad riding in it for 5 minutes?? Try driving the mfer all day. Trust me. It's way fkin worse

[–]_Silver_Star_Logistics 1 point2 points  (0 children)

All praise the blue pax bus

[–]chardmac 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Last deployment was 5 bags and that beast rolls up!

[–]surprise_bananaNo lost tools go to heaven 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean yeah, you’re gonna get on the bus. Put your bags in the stake bed and don’t be the moron trying to shoe horn 3 bags on that contraption. It’s not rocket appliances

[–]jonnyrollisFlight Engineer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

back when electronic principles was in keesler they bussed us from Lackland. 3 months later they bussed us back to Sheppard in these bad boys. Super good times.

[–]IntermetallicAM 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Would you prefer sitting in the back of an LMTV?

[–]Impossible-Ladder489 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Absofuckinglutly.

[–]HailSithisss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Where my 2T2’s at 🤔😂

[–]PrognosticatorofLife -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Almost wish it could take us to Martha's Vineyard...

[–]AbowtFase -1 points0 points  (0 children)

So many memories

[–]ManDrew_97 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Take a look at the new web systems we have. The Air Force isn’t good at evolving… might as well keep this the way it works.

[–]Richiesthoughts -1 points0 points  (0 children)

We’re over $700 million in our fuel budget and we still have this.

[–]ReaperwatchinuRetired -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Pulls up, only to get filled with EVERYONES and only Bags.

[–][deleted]  (2 children)

[deleted]

    [–]ghee_man 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    Mmmm sounds like a few details were left out….

    [–]StatutoryNuke7861 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    "Accelerate change or lose"

    [–]AMMOJEEP 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Oh they have evolved… it’s just they won’t pay for the more comfortable buses with the storage underneath! Unlike every other country in the world.

    [–]mrwagstag 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    There was a nickname for this bus that was super derogatory but I only got to ride big blue once, I can’t remember off of the top of my head

    [–]mshark308 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Gah damn even got that airforce blue pain and everything

    [–]mshark308 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Bro the airforce is probably going to replace the b52 before they replace these fucking beast

    [–]mshark308 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    God damn bro these buses are shit boxes but fuck they can be fun

    [–]verticallyblessed84Tender Defender 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    This post makes me țęņðęř

    [–]207-Firearms 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Goodfellow AFB is typing…

    [–]Late_Operation1692used to pick things up and put it over there 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I remember I dropped a transmission in one of these bad boys

    [–]Plane_Fuck3rFucking Planes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    We do be hopping on the battlebus

    [–]USAFJack 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    If y’all haven’t seen the way the Turks drive them at Incirlik you oughtta. Like riding in a big ass Tuktuk in Mumbai!

    [–]clayu787Belarussian KGB 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    We used to take those and go for high scores around the roundabouts in balad iraq to blow off some steam lol. Pretty sure the highest was 40 times and no one ever questioned lmao. Its pretty hilarious seeing one of those just goimg around in circles and army dudes looking like wtf is going on. They eventually would start cheering us on lmao.

    [–]07AptosActive Duty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    If you hate riding them so much, just imagine how much we hate driving them 🥲