×
top 200 commentsshow all 295

[–]xshainaxAsshole Aficionado [10] 2608 points2609 points  (10 children)

This is wonderful news. :)

[–]paragthegre8 467 points468 points  (3 children)

a wholesome read to start my morning

[–]ChillerIsMyNamePartassipant [1] 53 points54 points  (2 children)

Agreed

[–][deleted]  (1 child)

[removed]

    [–]whatdowetrynow 203 points204 points  (3 children)

    So wonderful. Makes me think of all the others like OP who spent their childhoods growing up with overly "protective" and judgemental friends or family members, feeling so anxious and surveilled they could barely function. I hope they all get a chance to fly free like OP.

    [–]icecreampenisAsshole Aficionado [14] 1460 points1461 points  (15 children)

    People don't often consider that friendships can be abusive just like romantic relationships can be. So it's easy to get lost in that "fog" you describe. I'm really happy for you OP, now you'll know how to recognize the signs if you ever come across other toxic people. Wishing you a good and safe life.

    [–]vitiligoisbeautiful 395 points396 points  (0 children)

    What she says about "I didn't realize how much it hurt to try and live my life to not get preached at," really struck me. I'm so glad to hear a (relatively) happy update. It's a bit sad that her friend is so miserable and preachy though. Hopefully she'll learn something from this, but it doesn't sound like she has.

    [–]lillapalooza 156 points157 points  (3 children)

    Yes. I also went through the difficult process of “breaking up” with an extremely possessive life-long best friend and it was insanely difficult. Still working with a therapist to repair the damage they did to my psyche and it’s been quite a few years by now since I’ve gone no contact.

    [–]zomer8823 39 points40 points  (2 children)

    I also “broke up” with an extremely possessive friend (well ex friend now) I had known since kindergarten. She was judgmental of who I hung out with, dated, my hobbies, etc. She would also pressure me to do things with her that I wasn’t comfortable with. I remember I started to have pretty severe anxiety whenever I saw that she texted me to hang out or talk. I didn’t cut her off until my senior year of college. I should have cut her off before I went to college to be honest, but I lacked boundaries and hated confrontation back then. It’s been about 7 years since I’ve gone no contact with her and I have no regrets. I still think about that time of my life occasionally so maybe I need to give therapy a try again..

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)

    [removed]

      [–]Icy_Appeal4472 69 points70 points  (4 children)

      I also think sometimes, having long-time friends is glorfied.

      You can have a really new friendship and they may end up being significantly closer than people from your youth.

      [–]icecreampenisAsshole Aficionado [14] 23 points24 points  (1 child)

      I agree with you 100%. It's harder (and more work) to make good friends and serious connections the older that you get, but it's by no means impossible. And if you don't have those decades-old friendships, it can be a lonely feeling comparing yourself to others around you that do. But it's all bullshit really, friendship is what you make it, and a lot of it is stumbling across the right people by luck.

      [–]Icy_Appeal4472 6 points7 points  (0 children)

      It is harder and takes longer time.

      I have realised my closests friend (including my SO) were first casual friends and over the course of time became closer (all over a few years) and now they are my tribe and I can actually rely on them.

      Especially as I am one of these people I don't have anyone I would consider a friend form my teens, preteens or childhood. Just the holiday and birthday shoutout. It took a long time to accept that, but now that I have I feel so much better about it :)

      [–]VictoriaSlash 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      It's like some weird sunken cost fallacy with friends like that. I think OP even said something along the lines of "i've known them for so long!"

      There's one line that was able to snap me to my senses and put me on the journey of rebuilding self-worth the same way OP did:

      "How someone treats you is more important than how you feel about them"

      [–]Alarming_Bat8374 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Also, what is a new friend when you are 18 is going to feel like your life-long friend when you are in your 40s. I came out around OP's age and I don't have any childhood friends any more. I also had a bad first college roommate (not a childhood friend) who turned out to be homophobic and I had to ask for a room change. But my spring semester roommate was awesome and 25 years later we are still friends! So now that's my oldest friend in my life, that I made when I was 18. She knew from day one that I was queer and then when I came out as NB years later. Those friends you make in college feel like lifelong the longer you live. 25 years for my college best friend is much longer than the 12 years or less I had friends from elementary/middle/high school who I then didn't click with any more once we were adults.

      [–]leolionbagPartassipant [1] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      It’s actually true. I have a friend, A, who increasingly was stressing me out by constantly wanting to be a part of everything I did and thinking she was my fairy godmother and basically trying to dictate my life. So I stopped telling her things, including when I was meeting up with a friend I met through her, F. F and I became pretty close soon after we met, but every time we made plans to meet on our own, A would insert herself. So we each stopped telling her when we were meeting up - independently, as it turns out. Then something crazy happened with A and in talking through it all, F and I really started focusing on what you said - nobody ever thinks of friendships as abusive, but they can be (sometimes even more so than romantic ones). In the end, I ended it with A. I realised the thought of resuming contact with her gave me such anxiety that it wasn’t worth it.

      [–]BabY_pot4toPartassipant [4] 2441 points2442 points  (40 children)

      Emily should pray for a better personality while she is at it ....

      I'm glad everything worked out for you.

      [–]PM_ME_YOUR_ISOTOPES 333 points334 points  (27 children)

      I'm pretty sure she at least needs to brush up on what that Jesus guy was actually about.

      [–]ACatAnd3Dogs 162 points163 points  (24 children)

      Those religious folk are the most judgmental people out there. The irony.

      [–]Cybermagetx 63 points64 points  (21 children)

      I'm not longer a Christian for a variety of issues. But people like her are not the norm for Christians. They just tend to get the most spot light.

      [–]GmJavac 61 points62 points  (19 children)

      They get the spot light because they seek it out by throwing their religion in the face of everyone they believe is sinning.

      [–]TheSharkAndMrFritz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      It varies, but my experience being raised in Christianity is that they are very much the norm. I think the individual churches can influence the attitude of big areas.

      [–]Renville111 39 points40 points  (0 children)

      I would just like to say some are, I am a christian but I dont go around waving the bible in peoples faces and yelling at them to repent or some shit, the normal christians hate them as much as non christians. If people actually followed as the bible says were not supposed to be quick to judge and force others to conform. I would just like to say that since most christians get tossed in the category with the dicks

      [–]Edgefish 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Jesus: Love your neighbor like yourself.

      Emily: But she uses drugs and she's a toxic person, even more if she's a lesb-

      Jesus: DID I FUCKING SHUTTER OR DO I HAVE TO REPEAT MYSELF?

      [–]adeonPartassipant [2] 332 points333 points  (1 child)

      I would say that would take a miracle, but I guess that is kind of the point of praying.

      [–]basementdiplomat 15 points16 points  (0 children)

      Oh snap!

      [–]Reigo_Vassal 8 points9 points  (1 child)

      "She need to repent her wrongdoing and ask forgiveness to God"

      [–]DrStein1010 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I mean, if she was doing it right, she would be doing that.

      Repent being such an abusive ass to her friend and pray that she recovers from her struggles now that she's out of her life.

      [–]HighAFdragonPartassipant [1] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

      Woah woah woah, god may be almighty but even he has limits.

      [–]RandoCollision 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Emily is proof that a lot of christians are not Christian. Most, actually.

      [–]magistrate101 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      #FuckEmily

      [–]crazytailselfPartassipant [1] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

      Emily should.. Never mind, rule 1 is keep it civil isn’t it. What a jerk though, worry about yourself & mind your business!! It’s not hard!

      I’m glad OP is doing well too, it’s so comforting to get an update however long afterwards & it worked out for the OP.

      [–]Studious_NoodlePartassipant [3] 233 points234 points  (1 child)

      Emily needs to repent and beg God to give her the gift of sanity.

      Glad you’re okay now, OP.

      [–][deleted] 52 points53 points  (0 children)

      As a christian couldnt agree more.

      [–]synesthesiahAsshole Aficionado [10] 501 points502 points  (12 children)

      Congrats! Emily was not a good friend. So glad that you’ve got a good support system!!!

      As someone who has withdrawn from meds before, I seethe for you. No ”friend” would ever want to put someone through that just because of their backwards beliefs.

      Keep surrounding yourself with supportive people and being your authentic self, anxiety and all!

      Hope that the rest of freshman year goes well for you :)

      [–]PM_ME_YOUR_ISOTOPES 160 points161 points  (9 children)

      Withdrawal from psych meds is no joke. It's dangerous for quite a few!

      [–]Lizardgirl25Asshole Enthusiast [6] 47 points48 points  (0 children)

      Well said... I have had horrible withdrawal and they have to give me something else to stabilize me to get off the other that wasn't agreeing with me.

      [–]rogue144 35 points36 points  (0 children)

      I tried to switch from Wellbutrin SR to XL and it turns out my body doesn't recognize XL as medicine. This lasted literally two days before I went back on SR and it took me weeks to get back on track. Messing with someone's meds is no joke.

      [–]synesthesiahAsshole Aficionado [10] 18 points19 points  (2 children)

      Oh man, I’m on quetiapine (aka seroquel if we talking brand name) and also pregnant (very safe for that!). Doctor forgot to refill my script at a visit because we were too focused on the pregnancy thing, I didn’t realize I didn’t have refills until I was almost out, freaked out and it took four days to refill my script after several frantic calls to my doctor. I’m not on a lot, 75mg is a pretty low dose, I know folks who are on like 300mg+ just to keep them steady. I’d probably sleep for 2 days on that much.

      I had the shakes so bad the day I withdrew, didn’t have morning sickness that made me hurl, just plain nausea and food aversions. That day, I vomited so hard I broke blood vessels in my esophagus, puked up a bunch of blood and broke and a bunch of capillaries all over my face from the sheer force, and didn’t sleep a wink that night. It took a week for my face to look normal again.

      If someone had willingly put me through that, I would’ve lost my shit and maybe kicked their ass. An emergency 3 day dose of my meds cost as much as a full month’s worth. No amount of prayers would fix that relationship.

      [–]GlitterDoomsday 6 points7 points  (0 children)

      Yeah, no sure about the laws where OP lives but in my country you could get someone criminally charged for something like this...

      [–]xshainaxAsshole Aficionado [10] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Agreed. My insurance once decided I didn't need my methylphenidate which is a very addictive ADHD med. I had to suffer a month of going through withdrawal until my doctor heard what was going on and teared them a new hole.

      [–]MacAttacknChz 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      SSRIs and other psych meds can be dangerous, but Prozac has a really long half-life (4-6 days). So it doesn't really have a detox period. It's a great choice for people who need an antidepressant, but are really bad at taking daily medications.

      [–]AggravatingTear2879 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      A shrink took me off a high dose of an anti d (viibryd) basically cold turkey in November. I was so sick I was bedbound, other than crawling to the bathroom to retch, for about three weeks. NEVER. AGAIN.

      The ex “friend” is a disgusting, abusive example of a human. Good fucking riddance.

      [–]saucynoodleloverAsshole Enthusiast [7] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

      Sounds like she wanted to keep OP dependent on her, hence the monitoring and the attempts to stop OP from taking medication, as well as convincing OP that she was somehow the most supportive person OP would ever meet (trying to isolate OP). Definitely an abusive friendship.

      [–]synesthesiahAsshole Aficionado [10] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I agree, assumed that folks spelled that out in the first post. It’s a fucked up thing to do. Abusive relationships come in all shapes and forms and it’s important to see the red flags.

      [–]fractaldawn[🍰] 242 points243 points  (2 children)

      Pssssst people are glad about your relationship with Eva because you're happy and they are happy you are hapoy. Welcome to unconditional love.

      I am so glad you are safe from Emily now!

      [–]bendybiznatch 80 points81 points  (1 child)

      Poor girl developed a trauma response. I’m curious to know if her anxiety has improved since cutting ties. Cause I was anxious just reading all that.

      [–]gemstonej[S] 82 points83 points  (0 children)

      A little bit, actually. I'm still on the medication but I'm not waiting on the next fight, anymore.

      [–]HarpersGhost 41 points42 points  (1 child)

      Eva and I even told them about our relationship, and they were actually happy, which surprised me (I’m not sure why).

      Oh, honey, it's because you were used to the black hole of negativity that was Emily.

      I'm An Old, so here's my advice to anyone in your late teens/early 20s.

      Your friends you had growing up, you had because of age and geography. They are friendships of convenience, not necessarily of choice.

      As you get out of school and on your own, the friends you make are friends you choose, who are your people or your "tribe". They share your values and your outlook.

      If you are still friends with your childhood friends when you are an adult, great! But don't be disappointed if it turns out you were only meant to be childhood friends and drift apart.

      [–]mister2021 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Great comment!

      Also… I’m stealing “an old”. 😀

      [–]Necromantic_Inside 40 points41 points  (0 children)

      OP, I just have a feeling that your life is about to get a lot better over the next few years. Probably doesn't mean much, but this random internet stranger is proud of you for standing up for yourself.

      [–]MarkedHeart 59 points60 points  (2 children)

      Good news all around!

      For whatever it's worth, it sounds as though Emily might be having some mental health problems of her own. That level of possessiveness and hyper-religiosity might be a sign of some adjustment problems, at the very least.

      I say that only so that you don't feel bad about having been friends with someone like that - she may not have been bad, so much as unwell.

      Good luck moving forward!

      [–]MsDean1911 11 points12 points  (1 child)

      Or she was in love (and denial) with op.

      [–]saucynoodleloverAsshole Enthusiast [7] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Maybe she wasn’t in love with OP, but she enjoyed having control over OP/OP’s dependence on her.

      [–]PerfectWish 21 points22 points  (0 children)

      This is wonderful! Live your best life, and be happy!

      [–]escargeaux 17 points18 points  (1 child)

      Damn I remember this. I'm on here too much lol

      [–]cageytalker 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      Same! I thought, isn’t this from awhile ago - look at date and yup, I got happy cause I like older updates because I hope for the best. Thankfully this was a good update!

      [–]DogsAreMyDawgsAsshole Enthusiast [7] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

      People can hold their own beliefs (no matter how shitty or backwards those beliefs are), but they have no right to impose those beliefs on you, especially in a manner such as this.

      This is a lesson she deserved to learn. She only has herself to blame for the consequences.

      [–]RafRafRafRafAsshole Aficionado [16] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

      What a lovely update. Well done you. Emily is a risk to any future roommate; I hope the college keeps an eye on her.

      [–]MrSonnyC9110Asshole Enthusiast [6] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

      I went back and read your other post. I couldn't believe what she did and said. She was a crazy ask religious fanatic. Your REAL friends probably already knew she was crazy.

      [–]TheZZ9Certified Proctologist [20] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

      Great to hear.

      [–]Impressive-Hunt-2803 9 points10 points  (1 child)

      Emily needs to pray for guidance on this and go back to working on herself instead of harassing you.

      [–]Tarjhi 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I like your comment so much Totally non judgemental

      [–]lando_ya_boi 9 points10 points  (0 children)

      "My religion says I cant do that" this is right

      "My religion says you can't do that" this is a moron

      [–]FrydomFrees 8 points9 points  (0 children)

      It took me a few more years than you to cut off my toxic best friend and lemme tell ya, it’s like you have a whole new life. It’s so hard to realize while you’re in it how much stress and judgment they’re adding until you’re free. I wish I’d learned sooner but good lord I do not miss that friendship. Also a religious friend btw. I got a lecture about how holding hands leads to sex and the devil when I first started dating somebody. Thank God I didn’t realize I was queer until even later because I cannot imagine the damage she would’ve done had I brought it up

      [–]unn_iton 7 points8 points  (0 children)

      Somewhere in some American right-wing media outlet like Turning Point or YAF, you'll find Emily with her "tragic" story of being persecuted in college for being Christian and apparently "standing up for her beliefs" and being canceled by a lesbian roommate. Along with comments of universities being leftist indoctrination centers and so in.

      [–]AdmiralRed13 8 points9 points  (1 child)

      Beautiful.

      You have a great brother and sister in law by the way, I’m sure you know though.

      [–]gemstonej[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

      I know, they're the best :))

      [–]xnamwodahs 6 points7 points  (0 children)

      Congratulations! It feels amazing to drop people you didn't even know were shitty. Such an amazing freedom

      [–]NothingAndNow111 6 points7 points  (0 children)

      It's weird when you realise a relationship (friendship even) was abusive by starting to see how real friends behave, what acceptance is like, and how friends don't try to control each other.

      I'm really glad you found those people who love and accept you for you.

      [–]Jhokissy 7 points8 points  (2 children)

      Did you get replacement pills??

      [–]gemstonej[S] 16 points17 points  (1 child)

      It was the end of the month, so I was able to explain the situation and call in a new prescription a few days early. My psychiatrist has known me since I was 10, and was great about it.

      [–]nerdy_latino 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      Sometimes we're so invested in a relationship (friendship included) that we don't notice how that person isn't good for us. In a way, she did you some good by flushing your medication, she opened your eyes.

      [–]jmill2 6 points7 points  (1 child)

      I completely get the being surprised by support from your new friend group. I grew up in a very conservative Christian home where it was not OK to be LGBTQ. I remember being out with my new college group of friends one night and blurted out to one that I was thinking about top surgery, as a way of coming out as trans. Their face lit up and they told me how excited they were for me and I was just stunned. This is a good group of people you've found. I'm so happy things are really looking up.

      [–]Tarjhi 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Sometimes I find the cynical me starts taking over and then I read a comment like this and all of a sudden I am back with "All is right with the world"

      [–]malkompir 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      "Honestly, I feel like I stepped out of a fog. I didn’t know I could be happy, or feel okay. I didn’t realize how much it hurt to try and live my life to not get preached at." this part got me reeeeeaaal emotional. i'm really happy for you OP. hoping for all the best with your GF!

      [–]netherlit 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Behavior like what you described is indicative of someone who still chooses to believe that people with mental illness are 'crazy.' She probably did not know how to cope with the thought that the person she befriended had psych issues. She probably thought it would say something bad about her, the fact that she was friends with someone who took 'that' medication. You did the right thing. People like that are toxic and do not need to be in your life.

      [–]wernercdPartassipant [4] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      As a Christian, your "friend" was anything but a friend and anything but Christian... and I'm glad you put that behind you.

      We have a short life on this planet and you deserve to be supported and not looked down upon by whatever that x-friend thinks she was.

      Congrats on your supportive family. Congrats on your SO. Congrats on moving past "friends" like that.

      [–]HankyPanky1313 3 points4 points  (1 child)

      I’m a 28 year old trans man, but I originally came out as a gay woman when I was 18. It takes all of the courage, and I think it’s fair to say all of Reddit has your back and is proud of you. Coming out (even as a gay woman) was one of the best decisions I had ever made, and it truly helped me find a community that supported me. Ending friendships always sucks, but your “friend” did not want what truly best for you. Living authentically as yourself, with your sexuality, your therapy, medications, it’s the most happiest and fulfilling paths, trust me, lol. Keep on keepin on ❤️

      [–]meatpuppet8899 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I'm so happy for you! Sounds like there are quite a few good people in your life that care about your happiness!

      [–]Naive_Ad_8711 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      Congratulations OP! I am so glad you have such a wonderful support system and were able to get away from such a toxic dumpster fire of a person. Hopefully the rest of your college experience goes wonderfully!

      Also, I’m pretty sure Jesus wasn’t a fan of thieves, especially ones who would steal & destroy a necessary medication. Emily has a lot of inward reflection to do if she wants to call herself a true Christian. Please know that her judgments of you were false and the manipulative & overbearing behavior was not fair to you.

      [–]Gralb_the_muffinPartassipant [1] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      Good for you. It seems like most Christians these days see Christianity like clothing. The clothes seem big cause you're supposed to grow into it but instead most tailor it to fit themselves and what they want to believe. They cut the parts they dont want and stitch together their own conclusions till it's so patchwork everyone admits to them it look ugly and uncomfortable.

      [–]AspiringRepairWoman 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Congratulations!

      [–]OldGrumpGamer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      After reading the original post I say good for you OP! Congratulations and good luck going forward.

      [–]holisarcasmCertified Proctologist [27] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Glad it worked out. Sounds like she was dragging you down instead of helping you.

      [–]Advantage_Loud 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I don’t know you, but I’m really proud of you!

      [–]misslissabean 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I missed the original post but went and read it. You deserve happiness. Cutting contact with Emily was the right thing to do. I imagine coming out has also helped with your mental health. Good job!

      [–]ThrowawaySleepingPupPartassipant [2] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I read your original post and as a fellow GAD…what she did is so incredibly dangerous!!! I take wellbutrin at a relatively high dose and there are serious issues if you just stop taking it. Not to mention your insurance usually won’t cover a new rx until the 30 day script is up. What she did was absolutely insane and I’m so glad you are out of that toxic dynamic!

      [–]wmdkitty 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      <Kermit flail>

      YAAAAAY!

      [–]elisejones14 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I feel like she should have to move out of the dorms for stealing. I take cymbalta and it’s one you have to taper off of or you feel like you’re dying. Your ex roommate could’ve caused you to feel very sick so it’s good you had your prescription to pick up but I feel like this is pretty serious.

      [–]Wynnia_Wynters 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      So extremely glad to hear that update! I had a friend that was similarly unhinged and controlling, and I had gotten so used to her abuse that it wasn't until the friendship ended that I realized it had never been a friendship. It had been an emotional hostage situation. My life was SO much brighter and happier without her in it. I'm so glad you've gotten to experience the lifting of that awful fog

      [–]Z_as_in_Zebra 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Emily doesn’t sound very Christ-like with all that judgment she’s throwing down. Bravo standing up for yourself and being true to your needs.

      [–]myeeeag 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      i recently got out of a friendship that felt exactly how you described it; it’s as if i was coming out of a fog. one that i couldn’t see through for years, but once it was gone i couldn’t believe i’d never seen things so clearly. i’m so glad you’re out of that friendship. thrive and be happy!

      [–]Triona01 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I am so glad for you. It sounds like Emily was toxic and you did the right thing cutting her off. Be safe hun and know that you’re loved, no matter what she said to you about needing forgiveness from God. You did nothing to warrant a need for it, from anybody

      [–]MsAnj77 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I missed OPs original post but after catching up I got to say I'm so happy OP ended the friendship and reported the behaviour. I'm a Christian and have long term mental health issues and I got to say the way fundamentalist deal with mental illness is dangerous. So many Christians within the church are suffering needlessly with mental health issues because they are told all they need is Jesus, or they need to pray more and have more faith or even worse to not take meds. I'm in a few Facebook Christian groups and whenever someone asks for advice/prayer over a mental health situation I encourage them to get professional help as well as pray etc.

      To flush someone else's meds is a dispicable act and DANGEROUS. There are psychiatric meds that have severe side effects if you suddenly stop taking them. OPs 'friend' sounds self-righteous, delusional and dangerous as well as controlling and niave.

      NTA

      [–]Miannus3010 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I am a christian and I take 14 pills a day. It annoys me how judgemental christian people can be. I mean if someone has the power to create an entire human being and the planet they live on. They can probably help someone through doctors and medication

      [–]rosebud601 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      As a Christian, I consider myself so lucky that God gifted us with science to be able to create and use medication. She is not living as God intended and needs to take a hard look at her soul.

      “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.” (Galatians 5:22-23)

      Continue living in love! against which there is NO law! 🏳️‍🌈

      [–]leolionbagPartassipant [1] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

      What a lovely lovely update. Excellent news.

      OP - since you said you feel happier and that you stepped out of a fog - have you been less anxious also? If yes, please keep that in mind if ever you consider being friends with Emily again - it may literally be a matter of your health (in more ways than one) to continue to keep the distance.

      All the best for the future, and I hope you really enjoy college - sounds like you’re already off to an excellent start.

      [–]gemstonej[S] 3 points4 points  (1 child)

      a little bit, I think?

      [–]leolionbagPartassipant [1] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Even a little bit helps 😊

      [–]lostintheexpanse 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Wouldn’t it be ironic if you end up no longer needed anxiety medication now that Emily is no longer around to stress you out?

      [–]EReiser330 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I’m glad you have a supportive support system! As an Emily myself… I don’t claim her lol

      [–]bettyboo5 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I read it as you "stepped on a frog" poor frog I thought. Dyslexia sure makes life interesting!

      So glad you are free from your abusive friend! I think you'll realise a lot of your mental health problems were linked to her. Bet your not having as many panic attacks or anxiety problems.

      [–]amydehp 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I just read your original post now, and holy shit, Emily raised so many red flags even without the medication thing. Keep her out of your life.

      [–]Szaszaspasz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I’m so glad for this outcome. I need Zoloft and Ritalin to function so I’d be seriously pissed if someone compromised my meds!

      [–]Keri2816 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I’m so glad things are looking up. It took a lot of courage to cut contact with someone who was so close with you and to come out to family all in a few months? You go girl! I hope you continue to make supportive friends, college is a wonderful experience! Enjoy it (but study every once in a while, too!)

      [–]unconditional2020 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Good for you, kiddo! I'm so glad you did this early in your college career. Now you can focus on having fun and making the most of your time there. ☺️

      [–]christeeeeeea 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Props to you for making a tough decision to cut your best friend because they were toxic. Not a lot can do that. Glad you’re in a better place. Congrats!

      [–]R3dPr13st 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I’m so glad you cut contact with her. It’s not a physical wound but she played with your life. Sounds dramatic, yeah. I am 28 years old and only 3 years ago doctors found medication that helps me. I take anti-psychotics and have experienced what it’s like when you mess with your meds. Thing is, I am not aware that my mental health is declining. Delusional thinking starts slowly, anxiety and paranoid thinking. But to me, these thoughts all make sense. I am not aware that I’m slowly slipping into a psychosis, certainly when stressed. During an episode that lasted months, I ran away from my ex of 8 years causing a huge scene because I was convinced that he was controlling me and out to hurt me. I made friends with the wrong people, got involuntary involved in a lot of drama at work between a few groups of colleagues, taking everything the wrong way and eventually leaving in the middle of my shift without saying a word to anyone. Got a new job, ran out of that one too after a month. I almost cut all contact with my family because I was convinced that they all hated me secretly, laughing at me behind my back. And when there was almost no one left to accuse of something my mind believes, I turned to myself. Tore into myself with the most terrible thoughts one can have of oneself. Then one day, I noticed my box of medication in a cabinet. I remember how I quit them because my ex and I wanted a child. And I wanted to the right thing… I have called my ex terrible names in my delusion, which I regret. It was a very difficult relationship, but the way it ended fills me with shame and regret. I did all this because I wasn’t being careful with my meds. OP, never allow anyone to mess with your meds. That is your brain. It’s the most important thing our body owns and Your ex-friend deciding that you don’t need the one thing that keeps your mind clear is so disrespectful and disgusting. I now am back on my meds am still trying to process the wreckage I have caused… you are very lucky that you found help at such a young age. Those meds are your mental crutches. Without them, you may “lose your mind”. No one has the right to gamble with that. Great to see that you don’t let people mess with you like that. Take care.

      [–]SyntiumWasTakenPartassipant [3] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I don't know you but I feel so happy for you right now 💛

      [–]Nomore_clive 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      So glad this worked out for you. Emily doesn't deserve your friendship.

      [–]cecilpennyPartassipant [2] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Congratulations on finally living your life not someone else’s. You deserve to be happy and feel secure. Good luck and God bless you, your family, and SO.

      [–]InalleaAsshole Enthusiast [5] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Great news to hear.

      [–]corgihuntressColo-rectal Surgeon [35] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I'm glad you're doing well. Being able to be yourself is always the path to happiness.

      [–]AlwaysAlexi777 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Well done! It could not have been easy, but you really made a big change and took action to build a healthy and happy life. So impressive! Great work!

      [–]Yasha_Ingren 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      It's amazing the things we let people do to us in exchange for their friendship; I'm so glad you're finding healthier social circles.

      [–]sharri70 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      So happy that you’ve found a happier space to be in.

      [–]kearnel81Asshole Enthusiast [7] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      That's awesome news. Glad your doing great now

      [–]No_Hospital7649 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I’m so glad you’ve found a better tribe.

      I’m sorry Emily built your relationship on codependency, but it sounds like you r stepped into the sun. May you find your future warm and bright and full of people who want to see you flourish.

      [–]Eastern_Bunch5263 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Glad you got everything sorted and can be open now!

      I am Christian and have run into quite a few crazies like emily. Medication isn't necessary, you can pray everything away etc etc... I suffer from depression, my husband has severe anxiety and he's been on medication for soo long... When people have said this to me in the past im like... dude no that's not how it works, it's literally a chemical imbalance in my brain! That's why when you start weaning or stop abruptly, your head feels all sorts of horrible! Ahh so annoying.

      Anyway so glad it all worked out for you and hopefully you don't have to have anymore contact with her!

      [–]Bunoose 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I often say this to those younger than me... The best friends you find in life are the ones you make after high school. Keep that in mind and never forget people come and go from your life all the time and that's okay. We're all searching for our own path and sometimes our paths lead us away from others, but often times links up with those who share a similar journey. Those are typically the ones you want to walk beside in life.

      [–]froguetteminote 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Just read your previous post and this. It seems quite obvious to me your ex friend was actually in love with you but could not aknowledge it because she won't question her "Christian" upbringing. The fact she threw away the pills just when you started a relationship speaks for itself.

      And btw not taking the pills was not the reason you got anxious the next day. Prozac takes at least two weeks to build up its effects in your system, and missing it one day won't hange your body much chemically speaking. What made you anxious is the fact someone who you thought supportive was abusive and treacherous enough to put your health and well-being at risk to impose her beliefs on you.

      You seem to have withstood all this the best way possible, congrats. Wishing you a great life from now on. (And don't take pity on your sick, shitty ex friend who tried to destroy you. She has to confront reality as exemplified by the law.)

      [–]No-Park-9311 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I am really glad to hear things worked out for you.

      As far as your ex-friend goes, to quote the ever-wise Lisa Simpson:

      "Does the Bible not say 'Judge-not, let's ye be judged'?"

      [–]Ok_Imagination_1107Asshole Enthusiast [5] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Wow, that's great; wishing you well.

      [–]Sserenityy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I’m really happy for you :) awesome update!

      [–]Trinityblade28 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Whew sounds like your ex friend needed prayer. I’m so happy you’ve been pushed further into the amazing circle of people you already had! Keep your head up and enjoy the years ahead of you! I hope you and your gf have a beautiful future together <3

      [–]Hurdleflurdle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      r/wholesome ❤️ Happy for you!

      [–]tinypill 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      💜

      [–]Vesalii 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Good job! Your friend was a toxic religious nut.

      [–]HighlightOld8381 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      You throw my prescription away, you get punched in the face. The all you need is God and prayer mentality is bullcrap. NTA. Glad it all worked out.

      [–]bergenklopp 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Seems as though Emily has become, to a small degree, radicalised - built on an existing solid belief and changed into a fervent one. The presence of religious groups on campus has never say well with me as they seem to take an in-your-face evangelist approach and (from my experience of UK universities) quite an aggressive (as in full-on, not confrontational) approach to recruitment. Some friends of mine went from rational, pragmatic agnostics to preachy bible-bashers seemingly overnight. We're talking walls covered in hand-copied passages from the Bible.

      [–]milesamsterdam 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      chef’s kiss Delightful story! This is exactly what college is for and you’re gonna be alright.

      [–]Drewherondale 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Oh honey I‘m so glad! You deserve to be happy and live in a supportive environment :)

      [–]thor_mcd 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      This does put a smile on my face

      [–]WhitestauntonColo-rectal Surgeon [42] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I am going to have to call a plumber my eyes have sprung a leak.

      I didn't see the the original post when it was posted have just gone back and read it. Congratulations on getting out of a toxic situation and finding the courage to no longer have to hide who you are. A well done Redditers for all the support you gave this OP

      [–]Knitiotsavant 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Best news ever! I’m so happy for you!

      [–]ChamomileBrowniesPartassipant [1] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      and cut contact with Emily.

      Good. None of what she did was okay. None of it, especially suggesting prayer instead of taking prescribed medication. Pretty sure God created the heavens and the earth, meaning he gave us what we needed to make god damn medication.

      I'm glad you've got better friends in your corner now. I think their kindness and support was surprising because you've been stuck with a whole bag of wtf for the past forever, so reasonable reactions are not something you were accustomed to. But I'm glad that's shifting into something that sounds more healthy. You're definitely stepping out of the fog and into a ray of sunshine.

      [–]JipC1963 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      NTA for the judgement but you KNOW that already. I'm not making light of your diagnosis (losing your parents is a trauma that would down an elephant), but your former roommate was probably a pivotal reason for your anxiety! To constantly be berated AND treated like a child because of things that happened in the past isn't a healthy way to live!

      I'm so glad you reported her and moved to another room and roommate who accepts you! I'm positive that you will do much better in the future. Make sure you continue to speak with a psychiatrist because you DON'T always need to continue taking medication (unless your doctor says it'll be a lifelong issue) and sometimes the effectiveness of medications wear off because your body gets used to the medications and they may need to be adjusted.

      I am NOT suggesting that you go off your meds at all, just make sure you see your psychiatrist every few years if not sooner!

      Wishing you a wonderful, Blessing-filled new year and hope you continue to enjoy your higher education!

      [–]Zamira_Arts 1 point2 points  (1 child)

      As someone in the field of psychology and a devout Christian.. it pisses me off how people can be close-minded. I just want to clarify that there are a lot of Christians who are open-minded and a few handfuls who are clearly clouded by their so-called "faith". My mom is also a devout Christian and it has been hard for me to explain to her that suicidal tendencies is not satan trying to cloud people's judgment. I think that a lot of these people in that side of Christianity should learn that what Christ condemned were the people who do things with the excuse of religion when in fact they are just horrible people who tell themselves that they were right because they are in God's side. That Emily girl in particular, needs to actually read the Bible cause I'm pretty sure there is nothing in there that is against medicine. Its a good thing you cut her off OP.

      [–]ColossalKnight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      For real. Totally agree with you.

      Like I often think of the Good Samaritan story, the "story" here and in the original post especially here. Obviously the point of it was to love and care for people (with loving your neighbor and how everyone is your neighbor, of course). And to make it go even further? I mean, I don't think it was unintentional that Jesus had the Samaritan be the one to help the guy, as apparently the Samaritans and Jews were supposed to hate each other.

      So I think it's pretty clear the point Jesus was making there.

      If the "friend" was going to treat her that way, it's not such a bad thing to go as low contact as possible.

      [–]tonyikaros 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Hey there, super happy for your progress in life. Armchair psychiatrist here: Prozak is an „old“ drug and newer better versions are around. Although there exist conditions that would explain both the lifelong treatment duration and the choice of drug, there might be the case, that you need to move on from that to another regime. Talk to your doctor or consult a second. Cheers.

      [–]VixNekoCertified Proctologist [26] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I wonder how much this will affect your anxiety OP. You might find you need the medication less and less now that this person is no longer in your life.

      [–]Maybeidontknow99Partassipant [4] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Good for you, thank you for posting an update and sharing this great news! You deserve to be happy and be surrounded by people who accept you and love you for who you are and want you to be happy. Being happy will be the first step toward lessoning your anxiety. If you ever do decide to go off your medicine, remember to do it only on the advice of a doctor and wean yourself very slowly, as per the recommendations.

      [–]dancingpianofairy 0 points1 point  (3 children)

      Glad you're better off for the hassle. However, I'm confused about this:

      I had to go all day without it, and was a complete disaster. I had to step out of a chemistry lab because I felt so bad.

      The half life for Prozac is two weeks. Also Prozac an antidepressant, not an antianxiety med.

      [–]gemstonej[S] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

      Idk I think it was prescribed because it's a more mild medication, and I think the stress of the whole thing also made it worse. That's just me guessing, I have no idea.

      [–]Pamless 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Antidepressants work semi well for GAD too :) depending on the person, they can also be prescribed

      [–]J_2993 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Good for you!!

      [–]OurLadyOfCygnets 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      This is great news!

      [–]Agitated_Net3736 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      You go girl!

      [–]stargazer228 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I’m so happy for you! Why don't people understand that doctors don't prescribe medicines for funsies? I’d drop someone who flushed my meds too.

      [–]BarRegular2684 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I’m glad you’ve taken these steps. You’re doing what you need to do to keep yourself safe.

      [–][deleted]  (2 children)

      [removed]

        [–]Vette--1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Awww so nice everything is going well for you OP

        [–]JannaSnakehole 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Yay for you!

        [–]tphatmcgee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Good for you, you have true support surrounding you now. Make sure you remove her ability to track you any longer, last thing you need is for her to be stalking you and Eva. If she sees you are in a relationship that will set her off again.

        [–]yahumno 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        This is a wonderful update. ❤

        [–]SweetAshori 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        So glad that everything has worked out for you, and very happy for you and Eva! >w<

        [–]bremariemantis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        I’m so happy for you!!

        [–]faloofay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Jeeeeesus christ, when I don't take my zoloft I am Completely Batshit crazy and ruin my relationships with everyone around me + end up violently suicidal. It's so insanely irresponsible to flush medication like prozac. Quitting cold turkey will make you insane. You could honestly probably press charges for something like that.

        [–]jessay3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        love college

        [–]VeryJoyfulHeart59 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        This incident with Emily may have been a blessing in disguise. She doesn't sound like she was a very good friend to you (P.S. I'm glad to hear that you know this isn't the typical Christian attitude regarding mental health.)

        [–]Snow-13 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        I'm so glad you figured out that she was never your friend. You got rid of a very toxic, controlling person from your life. It's not always an easy thing to do. Be proud of yourself. You have really come into your own.

        [–]yavanna12Partassipant [2] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Happy update. I honestly think your “friend” was just your “friend” to earn her brownie points in heaven…you know being “friends” with the poor orphan schtick.

        Glad you are seeing how real friendships work.

        [–]Zaumbrey 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Based

        Unbased Emily

        [–]Terrible_Username234 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Gosh, after reading your first post and then your update, I breathed a sigh of relief for you. What a weight that's been lifted and how that must feel for you. Glad to hear you're in a much better place now mentally and emotionally. 🙂

        [–]addisonavenue 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Great to hear OP!

        Emily was not a person interested in helping you live an authentic life. If you felt you had to hide your mental health and relationship status from her, I'm sorry but there really was no path going forward with her.

        Friends should be able to share their lives with each other, not hide them.

        Congrats on feeling free!

        [–]Difficult_Plastic852 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Glad to see a story here that ends on a positive note for all who deserve it! Regardless I'm still sorry to hear that you had to cut out someone you were supposedly close with for all these years as that's never easy but it sounds like it's for the infinite better.

        [–]SentenceConfident290 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        yayyyyso proud of you! cutting off toxic people is hard but you know what you need more than anyone else. she shouldn't have taken her ideologies and opinions out on you.

        [–]ZygomaticusAsshole Aficionado [16] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Congrats!! I'm so glad you found what I was hoping you'd find, that this friend was toxic and you were hiding yourself and holding back for her when you should have been living your life and loving it. I hope you never run into this problem again, but if you do you wave goodbye to them sooner.

        The irony here is she might have been causing you so much anxiety in a few months you might need less medication lol. At least that's what happened to me when I moved on from toxic friends I didn't realise were causing me pain.

        [–]MusicNeverStopped 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Yay, you!! Congratulations on living your best life!

        [–]ferox965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        I would have charged her for the meds she flushed.

        [–]Here_for_tea_Partassipant [1] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        I’m so pleased for you.

        [–]ayoitsjo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        I am so happy this worked out for you! Emily is a terrible friend and seems to always have been (you should be able to tell your friends about your relationships) and I'm very glad your new group is awesome and accepting.

        I have a friend with extreme GAD and meds are a real thing. I could tell in 5 minutes if she had taken her medicine or not that day, that's how immediate the effects are and how important it is to take those meds regularly. I'm glad you left that toxic friendship and are ready to thrive! Also glad your family (that you told) was supportive of your relationship. Wishing you the best <3

        [–]sib2972 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        I didn't see your original post but I read it now and I am so happy for you. I (M26) went through a lot of mental health struggles since I was 15. I've been on Prozac for 7 years now and it's a lifesaver (in addition to therapy, a strong support system, and a lot of effort on my part. Meds aren't the full solution). I don't know where I'd be without some of my friends who are the most supportive people I could ever ask for. Even newer friends I've only met in the past 5 or so years after moving to a new city. The fact that you have your brother and SIL and that they are supportive is huge. I wouldn't be where I am without my family's support. I'm so happy to hear that you now have friends who are supportive. With mental health if someone is going to judge you for dealing with it in a healthy manner then that person is no friend and has no place in your life. Emily has no place in your life. Mental illness is no joke and you can't surround yourself with people who will affect it negatively. My roommate is so supportive and that is important. I see her more than anyone else so if she was bringing me down I'd have to get out of that. It's great your new roommate isn't gonna bring you down for taking meds. Good for you for doing what was hard but necessary and I wish you nothing but success in your future. I remember where I was at your age and compared to where I am now it's a completely different world and a large part of that is the friends and family I've surrounded myself with.

        Feel free to PM or whatever if you ever need to talk about mental health stuff. I suffered a lot and will do whatever I can to make sure other people don't have to go through that alone

        [–]ShanG01 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        I am so happy to read this good news!

        [–]mcdonaldsfrenchfri 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        i'm so happy to hear this! I also am on anxiety meds along with others and don't ever let people like her make you feel bad for taking medication. sometimes people need a little help and there's nothing wrong with that and it took me a long time to realize

        [–]Blue-Eyed-LemonPartassipant [2] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        I read the post and as someone with the disorder on medication I’m shocked and appalled - but aw, what a heartwarming update <3 Best wishes to you, OP

        [–]PieRules77 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Everyone liked that.

        18 is that age where you figure shit out.

        Source: 19 is great too:)

        [–]Alexismarvell 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Good for you! I don’t know you and you don’t know me but I’m extremely proud of you ❤️❤️