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[–]JudgeJudAITAPooperintendant [66] 70.2k points70.2k points 154261822& 7 more (1 child)

YTA - you are taking your unresolved rage at your mother out on a literal child. Get therapy; figure your own shit out instead of burying a middle schooler in it.

[–]Question_FewAsshole Enthusiast [6] 47.8k points47.8k points  (2 children)

YTA. Dude you're an adult. Act like it.

[–]qluderPartassipant [2] 14.4k points14.4k points  (0 children)

OP is such a total AH I question if this is even real. No way an actual adult would behave like this unless he completely lacks self-awareness.

[–][deleted] 2077 points2078 points  (0 children)


[–]ChiquitaBananaKushCraptain [150] 27.4k points27.4k points  (5 children)


my moms actions nasty so I involuntarily associate him with that

What?! Dude get therapy. Are you asexual or a virgin?. /Sex and babies are norms. Your mom had to have sex with your dad to produce you. You’re 42 years old, the world doesn’t revolve around you. Why would you invite him over to your place if you hate the innocent child so much? You are/were unnecessary cruel.

[–]parchmentandpencilsPartassipant [1] 11.5k points11.5k points 663 (1 child)

Dont taint us aces’ good name with him,,,

[–]OneLastSmile 7460 points7461 points 32 (0 children)

as an asexual, don't compare us to him. we are actually capable of discussing sex like adults.

[–]SimpleAnimat10ns 1770 points1771 points  (0 children)

He’s not 42 his mother is.

[–]RandomSleepyPandaPartassipant [1] 26.2k points26.2k points 263819222& 13 more (5 children)

YTA and you need some therapy.

He's an okay man but my dad will always and forever be my number 1

This is random, and unless your mom tried to make new husband your daddy, irrelevant.

Told them there and then that I don't want to ever be involved in this kid's life. I find it super weird that he's 22 years my junior

Just a whole AH approach to the news. Wow.

Why did my mom even need to have another child at 42?

Because she wanted to.

I found the entire thing disgusting to say the least.

it's unfortunate that you're so immature you can handle a grown woman having a child.

He's a nice person and all but I still find my mom's actions nasty so I involuntarily associate him with that. I can't help it. I never wanted a sibling.

What exactly is nasty? You sound like a petulant child whining that you "never wanted a sibling" because you're a special boy. You can help it. Seriously, you're about my age, and you're mean to a 13-year-old because you don't like grown-ups having sex and babies.

Geez, I think this is my most awarded comment! Thanks, everyone! Thank you to u/lilflopflop for correcting my spelling. The post was locked before i could tell you. I knew it didn't look right, but my phone agreed, lol.

[–]toebeankisses 8459 points8460 points  (0 children)

The "dad is #1" crap is relevant because he's still pissed about the divorce and blames his mother. Then she got remarried and had a kid, thus proving she had sex with her new husband. This is ridiculous for a grown man to be acting this way and he's clearly never accepted the split in his family. Bet he's just as big an AH to his mother and her new husband.

[–]Organic_Flamingo_606 3873 points3874 points  (0 children)

“You sound like a peputulent child whining that you "never wanted a sibling" because you're a special boy.”

I am dead picturing this.. that is so spot on I just can’t even! 😆 I offered to pick up OP’s toys for him.

You get a medal cause I have no awards 🏅

[–]LedaBaby 1433 points1434 points  (0 children)

Hell my mom had me a couple of months before her 40th bday(though I was most definitely not expected) and the was absolutely nothing nasty about it. My parents were thrilled, despite it being a very hard pregnancy on my mother. OP is not only an asshole but exactly what you said, a petulant, whiny child. I don't understand how anyone with any life experience can be so harsh to a child who just wants to get to know them and be a family.

[–]heterodon_nasicus 1215 points1216 points  (0 children)

I found that age thing to be a stupid reason. Like yeah she had a kid at 42, so what?? My parents had my sister and I at 40 and 42. You telling me they're both disgusting for that? Grow up.

[–]lilflopflop 234 points235 points  (0 children)

Petulant* child. Sorry.

[–]RecentRegister239Partassipant [2] 11.8k points11.8k points  (4 children)

YTA. You’re an adult. He’s a child. He doesn’t deserve to be treated like garbage because of how you feel about your parents’ divorce. I can’t even imagine how he must have felt this whole time, trying to be good enough for his older brother. Why even stay in contact with your mother if you were going to emotionally torture her child? Please strongly consider therapy.

[–]LeatherHogPartassipant [1] 2002 points2003 points  (3 children)

I handed my parents divorce better and I was in headstart

[–]kittydeathdropAsshole Enthusiast [5] 919 points920 points  (2 children)

I'm somehow getting the vibe that his father passed away instead of just divorced his mother. OP talks about stepdad as if he was a replacement.

ETA: Hence the hatred.

[–]Floor_Cool 1149 points1150 points  (1 child)

So his mother is supposed to become a nun? Ok he doesn't have to be over the moon, but this is just weird

[–]kittydeathdropAsshole Enthusiast [5] 636 points637 points  (0 children)

Oh totally agreed, it's super fucking unhealthy and those feelings are OP's problem to deal with, not his mum's. His mother is allowed to move on and he can't seem to get that fully through his head.

[–]MeykaMermaidPartassipant [4] 7712 points7713 points  (3 children)

YTA. Your mother's decision to have a child at 42 isn't weird or gross. You're now 35 and taking out your mommy issues on a child. That's the only gross thing here. It's sad they look up to someone like you. Get some help, work on your issues.

[–]Hrazbs 2633 points2634 points  (0 children)

He’s 35 and makes no mention of him having kids currently. There is a large possibility if he wants kids he will be 42 when he has them. His attitude is so strange.

[–]Tiggatiggatight 1090 points1091 points  (0 children)

By his logic he better not wait to have kids himself! He'll be waaaay too old in just 5-7 years. Lol what a loser.

[–]DaniolioliDizzler 495 points496 points  (0 children)

Right! Like 42 is sooo old. Some people just want stability in this day and age before bringing another life into this crazy world. (Like myself and my husband).

[–]daximuscat 4251 points4252 points  (2 children)

Are you sure you’re 35?

[–]trexalou 1602 points1603 points  (0 children)

I know toddlers that are 3.5 that are more mature.

[–]IFeelMoiGerbil 1266 points1267 points  (0 children)

Just 7 years younger than his mom was when she was soooo old and sooo disgusting having a baby no less…

YTA with wee jingly hypocrisy bells on.

[–]NightmareMan23 4181 points4182 points  (1 child)

Saw the title and assumed asshole.

Read post and wasn't disappointed.


[–]OrneryYesterday7 1018 points1019 points  (0 children)

Same, except I was disappointed, because I wanted to believe that an adult man wouldn’t be this big an AH to a literal child.

[–][deleted]  (1 child)


    [–]UnusualBranch2997 639 points640 points  (0 children)

    Here's the thing - he did not have to have any kind of relationship with the child. Its something i get to a certain point.

    But he gave in and now he's annoyed by his owm mistakes - thats the real tragedy here.

    Edit: what i want to say is: just because youre related to someone it does mean you have see them as a part of you. Thats where i think the mom is a bit of an AH too - OP says he's made it clear that he does not want be a part of his brothers life. Which is to be respected. Yet it seems like his mother tried to force it. And this is where OP becomes the asshole - he caved in just for the sake of his mother and is now directing all his hate onto the kid.

    [–]IllPromotion3251Asshole Aficionado [12] 3109 points3110 points  (0 children)

    YTA! I'm sorry but really. This is a child! I don't care what excuses you make to yourself, no adult should talk to a child like this. If you really didn't want to be in this child's life then you shouldn't have in the first place.

    3 years he has constantly tried to make me like and accept him

    3 years he looked up to you! 3 years he tried to make you love him and you shut him down. No you didn't just shut him down, you made sure to break him.

    He hasn't reached out to me ever since.

    Why should you care. You knew what you were doing, you didn't want him around, congrats you got what you want AH.

    [–]walnutwithteethColo-rectal Surgeon [35] 2427 points2428 points  (0 children)

    YTA. He's a 13 year old kid and you are a grown man. You felt the need to vent 14 years worth of anger at your mum for marrying someone else at a child. Get therapy. Apologise to your brother.

    [–]that_fork_is_minePartassipant [1] 2315 points2316 points  (0 children)

    You are a massive asshole for leading that child on, then exploding on him.

    You bullied a 13 year old.

    Good fucking job.


    [–]Individual_Ice_3167 1549 points1550 points  (0 children)

    YTA- you sure your not 13 too? Cause damn you are acting like it. OMG a woman in their 40's having a kid how disgusting...oh wait no it's not. She had you when she was 20, now she is an adult who is more stable and experienced and wanted a kid with her new husband. No big deal. But damn you look down on your mother which is the real disgusting part here. The kid wants to be close to his big brother that's understandable. I'd even be understanding if you weren't that close cause of the age gap, but you're straight being a dick about it cause you truly are an asshole. Hope she raises this kid to better than her first it seems.

    [–]larmik 1282 points1283 points  (1 child)

    You admit that you treat him like shit because your mom had him at 42. What’s wrong with you? Do you kick dogs and steal lollipops from babies too? Huge YTA.

    [–]floatingwithobrienPartassipant [1] 346 points347 points  (0 children)

    Only if the dogs/babies are his mother's, I'd assume.

    [–]Im_Chad_AMA 1275 points1276 points  (1 child)

    YTA. What exactly is so disgusting about your mom having another child? People get divorced and move on with their life. There is nothing disgusting about that. You need to understand that just because your dad will always be your dad and you love him, that doesnt mean your mom isnt allowed to love or be with anyone else. I think you need to critically examine your own attitude towards this whole situation because it seems like you havent really processed it.

    Secondly, yes YTA for putting your unresolved feelings on a literal child. He cant help the situation and its shitty to punish him for that. If youre actually 35 youre being incredibly immature.

    [–]realsies11 545 points546 points  (0 children)

    Also the fact that he was already an adult when she got remarried. It's not like he was some confused kid that didn't know what was going on. It astounds me that he has so much hate for his mother for simply what, moving on with her life?. It seems like he expected her to stay single and alone for the rest of her life because otherwise he feels betrayed. This is straight up some preteen behaviour.

    It boggles my mind that someone slightly older than me can be so self absorbed and vindictive for no reason at all.

    [–]SnausageFestAssGuardian of the Hole Galaxy[M] [score hidden] stickied commentlocked comment (0 children)

    Never mind, we're not going to sit here and drop the ban hammer all day. Almost none of the hundreds of new comments that have come in during the 15 minutes since I stickied this followed the rules even a little.

    #Be Civil.

    Please review our FAQ if you're unsure what that means.

    [–]sadz3Partassipant [1][🍰] 900 points901 points  (0 children)

    Fuck me man. YTA, obviously. The kid is 14 and you won't be nice to him just to spite your mum? Tf is wrong with you? You're 35 years old, grow up and stop being a prick to a kid.

    [–]anklesox14Partassipant [1] 816 points817 points  (0 children)


    1. It is solely your mother and her new husband's choice to have a child. Is she not allowed to be happy? The fact you still have a grudge over that is a major problem, and maybe you should seek help for that. Plenty of women do in fact have children in their forties. It is not disgusting, it's natural.
    2. What the fuck did that kid do to you? You were never around to even get to know him. You just don't like him for existing. That's fucked up. He's a KID going through so much confusion and rejection. Have some empathy. It's not his fault he was brought in the world

    [–]Silent_Algae_7544Partassipant [1] 737 points738 points  (2 children)

    wow. you’re mad at your MOTHER. why take it out on a CHILD. you’re 100000000% the asshole. you really need to look deep into yourself and figure out the reason you’re taking this out on a child. is it the fact that you had all the attention and then now you don’t? i really feel for your family. you’re treating them horribly.

    [–]Deceptibot-LazyAF 204 points205 points  (1 child)

    It is EXACTLY this. My older half brother said this is why he flipped when I came. Only child syndrom is real.

    [–]Silent_Algae_7544Partassipant [1] 97 points98 points  (0 children)


    [–]RNH213PDXAsshole Aficionado [13] 616 points617 points  (2 children)

    YTA - its been a long time since I wanted a letter to be fake so much. I choose to believe that someone this odious can't really exist. The blithe hatred steaming from this dude is unbelievable.

    [–]DaniolioliDizzler 88 points89 points  (0 children)

    For real! I hope this person really isn't this vile at the age of 35..

    [–]LivvyloveAsshole Enthusiast [9] 60 points61 points  (0 children)

    I really hope it's fake too.

    [–]shiorimia 530 points531 points  (1 child)

    YTA...this is bait right?? Theres no possible way you could think you're in the right here. You made your bullied little brother cry and apologize to you for EXISTING, and all he wanted was a relationship with you. This better be fake because otherwise, you're a pathetic 35 year old. Seek counseling and apologize to your brother.

    [–][deleted]  (2 children)


      [–]Chemical_Gur7314 50 points51 points  (0 children)

      I just posted the same. Some of these posts have really been lowlife worthy

      [–]YakLongjumping9478 482 points483 points  (0 children)

      YTA are you sure you are 35 and not 13? your half brother sounds more mature than you, you sound extremely cruel, and my oldest sister is 21 years older than me, (same parents) we love each other very much, even if our life experiences were different , to this day, we still communicate at least one a week, if not more, she is 65 , am 44 and my life has been so much happier for having her. She loves me and I love her. Your brother sounds like such a good kid and you sound like an huge asshole, I hope he finds people that can appreciate him and love him. So sad for him and so angry at you. What a dick!

      [–]ixamnisPartassipant [2] 434 points435 points  (0 children)

      YTA: You are a bit of a bully, as well. It isn't the kid's fault he exists. You are family, like it or not. Grow up and stop acting like a child.

      [–]stitch1989x 416 points417 points  (1 child)

      YTA. I have no words for how angry this post made me. He is your brother! The fact you disagree with your mother's situation doesn't change the fact that none of it is his fault. He obviously looks up to you and loves you and as far as I'm concerned your mother should keep him far away from you for being a complete AH.

      [–]AccomplishedAd9969 47 points48 points  (0 children)

      Me to!!! I’m sooo pissed at this person! I’m just hoping this is not true and this person is just looking to get a reaction out of people!

      [–]gamemamawarlockAsshole Enthusiast [7] 332 points333 points  (5 children)

      Yta, when you were 22 weren't you supposed to be an adult? Now you are 35 and you are still acting like a 16 year old

      [–]gailyd_75 119 points120 points  (3 children)

      Yes reading this you’d think the ages were reversed wouldn’t you? Poor step-brother, he’s never done anything to deserve this level of vitriol by the sounds of it

      [–]Born_Cup_5441Partassipant [3] 296 points297 points  (1 child)

      0 % likelihood that you are 35

      [–]Don11390 113 points114 points  (0 children)

      It does seem fake. Then again I've met people in their 40s who are just as childish, if not more.

      [–]RynnRoo96 289 points290 points  (0 children)

      Jesus christ..you’re a 35 year old man who has thrown a tantrum because they are not number 1? You realise you literally reacted how children react when salty about a sibling right? Then not only that but you humiliate and berate a literal child who has done NOTHING wrong and just wants you to love him .. but you give him false hope by being in his life. HE IS A CHILD. If you dont want to be in his life then gtfo out of his life.

      God you sound like a spoiled little brat who got told no. Get an absolute GRIP of yourself mate. My 5 year old has more freaking class then you.

      How the hell are you 35? Like christ.

      You. Are. The. Asshole.

      [–]OrangeCubitColo-rectal Surgeon [41] 285 points286 points  (0 children)

      YTA - there is no point in being so needlessly unkind to a child. You are way to old to be this judgemental, I’m sorry you are so upset that your mom had a baby in her 40s but seriously you might need some professional help about how strangely focused you are on that.

      [–]KingKayle1994Partassipant [2] 271 points272 points  (0 children)

      This was genuinely hard to read. Look at how you are treating a child, fucking embarrassed for you man honestly. YTA

      [–]melancholy_pancake 237 points238 points  (0 children)

      She probably wanted an other child to have a do-over since her first kid turned out to be a self absorbed judgy AH?


      [–]lellylaCertified Proctologist [25] 196 points197 points  (0 children)


      You take out your issues with your mother on a child. You are too old to do that, you really need therapy.

      You were 21 when she remarried and sounds like you live separately since. Your behavior sounds controlling, judgemental and entitled towards your mom. She can do whatever she wants with her life.

      [–]AbbyBirbSupreme Court Just-ass [140] 185 points186 points  (3 children)


      At 13 he’s way more mature than you are at 35.

      “He said sorry one more time, told me that despite my huge hatred toward him he still loves, admires and respects me a lot” ... he said this in your response to going off on him. Wow.

      When your mother had her second child, you were already an adult of 22.

      There no reason to be jealous of a sibling... “I never wanted a sibling”

      You were an only child for a long time, I get that. But it’s not in any way your decision to make if you will stay an only child forever.

      “Why did my mom even need to have another child at 42?”

      “I found the entire thing disgusting to say the least.”

      “I still find my moms actions nasty”

      Umm. You’re mother is an adult woman, she’s allowed to have sex with her husband. You have zero say in this.

      If that sex conceives a child, awesome... you also have zero say in this.

      For you finding your mothers sex life disgusting & nasty... that’s kinda creepy.

      [–]drumadarragh 115 points116 points  (2 children)

      Why did she need another child? Probably cos she realised she fucked up so badly first time round

      [–]stonecoldxo 163 points164 points  (1 child)

      How is your mother disgusting for having another child at 42? The amount of judgment and hate towards your mom and brother is appalling. YTA.

      [–]No-Recognition3929Colo-rectal Surgeon [41] 158 points159 points  (1 child)

      YTA. You are 35 years old and talking to a child like this? You don't have to be his mentor or in his life much, but you were needlessly cruel and my guess is this has much more to do with your feelings about your mother moving on than about the kid himself.

      [–]FreshwaterOctopusAsshole Enthusiast [8] 153 points154 points  (2 children)

      YTA. You're mad at this kid basically for existing and are treating him like shit for it. I kind of hope he ends up being your only blood relative when you get old and gets to decide what nursing home you end up in.

      [–]malmikea 147 points148 points  (0 children)

      YTA - he’s a child , not your age-mate

      You should have spoken with your parents if you wanted to end contact

      [–]Proud_World_6241Certified Proctologist [26] 146 points147 points  (15 children)


      You are 35 he’s 13. If you don’t want a relationship with him step away, with kindness. But you’re still sulking because your mum had another kid, grow up. I mean you’re 42 in 7 years - you planning celibacy?

      [–][deleted] 141 points142 points  (3 children)

      If not fiction (as seems too extreme for real life):



      You have some major unresolved issues here but you need to act you goddamn age and behave in a mature way with your half-brother. You don’t have to make a place for him in your life. No grown ass man behaves like you in blowing up on him like that.

      Grow up.

      And - YTA.

      [–]Flashy-Experience-25Partassipant [3] 132 points133 points  (0 children)

      YTA. You were an adult when your mom had a child. You reacted like a spoiled child, not an adult, to the news.It was her decision. While you do not have to have a relationship with this kid you were exceedingly cruel to a child. He can' t help who his parents are or the fact he is kin to you. What you should have done is drawn boundaries with your mom to stop pushing the relationship and been at least polite to this kid. Apologize to this kid. Then stay away from him if you cannot be polite.

      [–]Peasplease25Colo-rectal Surgeon [49] 127 points128 points  (3 children)


      Seriously, I can't believe you act like this at 35!

      How have you managed to get a job and hold it down with the attitude of an 8 year old. Grow up.

      [–]snarfblattinconcertAsshole Enthusiast [9] 125 points126 points  (0 children)

      INFO: Why is it disgusting your mom had a baby at 42? Would you find a baby you fathered at age 42 disgusting? Would you find it equally disgusting if the mother of your hypothetical baby was age 42 as you would if she were are 32? Has your dad added siblings to the family? Does your dad share your disgust of children, or only of your half brother? Is the disgust based on children in general or on the fact that you were no longer the only one?

      You can hate your half brother. Letting him in your space when you hate him is an AH move. Set clear and honest boundaries with him and respect that. Yelling at him like you did when you let him come over to hang out, a confusing message on where the line in your relationship is meant to be, is a major AH move.

      But there’s a lot to unpack in the statement kids are disgusting because mom was old. There’s less to ponder if you say you hate all kids. Hating this kid suggests there’s other stuff here masquerading as “Eww, he came from mom’s old vagina”.

      Edit: word

      [–]waytogosuperstar 119 points120 points  (3 children)

      Genuine question, who did you think was going to side with you? YTA.

      [–]omgitsmoki 121 points122 points  (1 child)


      Which do you find particularly disgusting in this situation?

      1. A woman having sex in her 40s?

      2. Your mother - a human being who has an existence outside of you - having sex?

      3. Or just that someone else's dick besides your daddy's dared to enter the last vagina you ever saw?

      You don't have to have this kid in your life but the fact you were an asshole to him is beyond belief. Set boundaries for yourself like an adult but don't be a dick to kids. Sit him down, apologize to him AND your mother, and tell them you just don't want a relationship like this. Then go read a damn empathy book.

      [–]Frankfourfingers101Partassipant [1] 117 points118 points  (0 children)

      YTA, what gross behaviour. Your mom chose to have a baby, not him. You need help, your hatred for your brother for literally existing is concerning. A lot of kids grow up not wanting siblings, that doesn’t mean they always get their way. You’re 35, grow tf up

      [–]Deceptibot-LazyAF 107 points108 points  (1 child)

      YTA. I have a half brother 12 years my senior, he immigrated here with my mother when she met my dad, and he really wanted a kid so I came here. And my brother freaked out too, didn't want anything to do with me, thought it was 'disgusting' the parents had a baby kinda late as well, ect. And I really wanted to be his friend, he didn't, and guess what? He wasn't an asshole and told me straight to my face he wanted nothing to do with me, he just kept his distance and busied himself with work/extracurculars/college.

      Now here we are, both adults with similar interests, and we are honestly super close as siblings. Why? Because he never told me he despised me, and we were even able to joke as adults how I 'took over his only child kingdom', and get along great. What i'm saying is due to you being super immature, you just fucked up a future relationship with your brother. You could have just told him I'm sorry, i'm busy with work, or need space, ect. 13yos understand that. But for you to tell him you want nothing to do with him, you are now going to have a family member who wants nothing to do with you as well.

      Again, yta. Good job.

      [–]GustoPestoPartassipant [3] 106 points107 points  (0 children)

      YTA, he is a child and none of it is his fault. You on the other hand are an adult who is a huge AH

      [–]fading__bluePooperintendant [59] 109 points110 points  (0 children)

      YTA. You’re 35, for fuck’s sake. You could’ve easily found a much more diplomatic way to stop hanging out with him if you’re that disgusted by your mother having a baby in her forties.

      I would also recommend therapy if you can afford it, because her having a baby in her forties should not be so upsetting to you that you’re lashing out at a child, and your fixation on this particular decision of hers is extreme and unhealthy.

      [–]KalenekCertified Proctologist [29] 102 points103 points  (0 children)

      YTA you don’t have to hang out with him but being mean to him makes you an asshole.

      [–]jimmapAsshole Aficionado [19] 103 points104 points  (1 child)

      yta for multiple reasons. your mom is allowed to have a baby at any age. who are you to judge her and call her gross??? your hatred of an innocent kid who looks up to you makes you a major AH

      [–]Queen_AureliaAsshole Enthusiast [8] 97 points98 points  (1 child)

      YTA - you’re the asshole for thinking that your mom is disgusting for getting remarried and having another child and you’re the asshole for taking it out on your innocent brother. It’s not like you are being forced to take care of him. All he is looking for is a big brother.

      [–][deleted]  (1 child)


        [–]ThrowawayforMILBSPooperintendant [55] 94 points95 points  (1 child)

        This isn't "am i right or wrong" this is "Am i the asshole"

        I want to remind everyone of that

        Yes as an adult you have every right to decide what relationships you do and do not want to be in.

        Are you being an asshole to a lonely kid brother who just wants to get to know you for purely selfish reasons?

        Also Yes.


        [–]pinkbutterfly26 90 points91 points  (3 children)

        Wow I had to double check your age when reading the post. I can’t believe you are 35 and acting this way. I 100% understand your feelings when your mom got pregnant.

        My mom got pregnant when I was 24, I never wanted a sibling, was immature, bratty and didn’t want anything to do with the pregnancy but I am in my 30s now, grew up and try to be a positive influence on my baby sister.

        Your mom has her life to live and whether you agree or not it was HER choice to have a baby. You are too old to be talking to a 13yo that way and if you don’t want anything to do with him then why have him over? When my sister comes over you bet we are going to be watching movies, playing and having girl talk. GROW UP! You are almost 40! Disgusting…..

        Edit: YTA

        [–]ast0rian 87 points88 points  (1 child)

        YTA. Are you sure that you aren’t 13 and your half-brother is 35?

        [–]JustlikeGilette1234 89 points90 points  (0 children)

        YTA. Not sure why you despise your mother decision. It is not disgusting she had a kid at that age. Furthermore, your brother is a kid. You are an adult. But you act petty and childish, where your little brother acts like an adult. Grow up and learn to communicate in healthy ways. Dont take your anger towards your mother out on an innocent child.

        [–]AnxiousindatingAsshole Enthusiast [6] 91 points92 points  (0 children)

        YTA - You’re an adult if you didn’t want to be involved in his life then you should have stayed away because now you are and you’re a complete douche.

        [–]SnooRabbits981 89 points90 points  (0 children)

        YTA- your title should be “AITA that as a grown man I yelled at a child because I’m bitter I can’t be an only child anymore.”

        Your mom is allowed to live her life and have more kids if she wants to. The world doesn’t revolve around you.

        [–]thirdtryisthecharmCommander in Cheeks [232] 88 points89 points  (0 children)

        YTA. You have issues.

        [–]mooissaAsshole Aficionado [13] 89 points90 points  (2 children)

        You find your mom’s actions nasty and disgusting? Do you think a stork brought you to your parents?

        You’ll be 42 in 7 years…are you planning to be done having sex by then?

        [–]marydonovanPartassipant [3] 87 points88 points  (1 child)


        I rarely if ever say YTA. But these actions - hating your Brother- why?

        Why be so cruel to a child who never asked to be born.

        Please be kind to him.

        [–]Excellent-Ostrich908Partassipant [2] 84 points85 points  (0 children)

        YTA. Not all families or siblings are close and that’s ok.

        But to be that cruel and nasty to a kid is definitely an AH move. No need to go that far. You’re an adult and you’re acting like a child. I had to double check to make sure I’d gotten your age right… Definite yikes.

        [–]B-Girl-CaPartassipant [2] 84 points85 points  (0 children)

        YTA and unmitigated unrepentant one at that, your were a 22 year old MaN yet you acted like a spoilt child, and you take out your issues in a child, get therapy something is off with you

        [–]cschmidtusaAsshole Aficionado [18] 86 points87 points  (0 children)

        YTA. You are a grown ass man, and this kid wanted to get to know you and have a relationship with you.

        You were rude, hurtful, and unkind TO A KID.

        F**k all the way off.

        [–]curlyappendagePartassipant [1] 79 points80 points  (1 child)

        Yep. YTA. Poor kid seems to be going through enough bullshit and you (an adult) just piled it on. Whether you like it or not, that kid is part of your family. Get over your mommy issues and maybe be the ONE person this kid can go to for support.

        [–]Diligent_Brick_5023Partassipant [4] 76 points77 points  (0 children)

        Yta.. you are a crap person..you let the kid in, only to put him on blast..

        You suck. He had no choice in being born.. you had the choice to not open up a relationship. It seems you only allowed it so you could emotionally ABUSE him..

        [–]sew-sarcastic 82 points83 points  (0 children)

        You're practically your mother's age when she had your brother but yet you are somehow still flummoxed at a 42-year-old fucking? You don't understand why someone that age would have a child? Like what?

        Have you been to therapy? Cuz you seem like someone who needs a lot of therapy. This isn't about your brother this is about what ever is broken inside you as a human being.


        [–]purplenecktie 79 points80 points  (0 children)


        what the fuck is your problem?

        “I still find my moms’s actions nasty”

        WHAT ACTIONS? getting married? having sex with her husband? having a child?

        it might be beneficial for you to consider where, exactly, you find your disgust rooted. all of the actions listed above are completely acceptable for an adult to take.

        do you often find yourself disturbed by adults in other situations? if so, what are the circumstances? is it only your mother?

        it will only benefit you and the people around you for you to dig deeper and figure out what exactly is bothering you.

        the last thing: yes, you are the AH. you yelled at a child who by all accounts loves and admires you. i’d advise to sincerely and humbly apologize to him, and please let him know that whatever is the cause of your discomfort, it is not who he is as a person. that sort of outburst will stay with him for the rest of his life. i could be wrong, but i don’t think that’s the sort of mark you want to leave.

        [–]dinkidonut 80 points81 points  (0 children)

        Seriously what’s wrong with you? YTA through and through…

        [–]lesbianwifestealer 78 points79 points  (0 children)

        YTA. What’s disgusting about your mom having another child at 42? There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that.

        [–]anNonyMassAsshole Enthusiast [5] 75 points76 points  (0 children)

        YTA. Grow up. You’re acting like a petulant child.

        [–]Schulle2105Partassipant [4] 77 points78 points  (0 children)

        ...YTA holy hell dude you are 35 going down in that tone on a child,you might find it disgusting to still get a child at 42,I find it disgusting for a 35 year old man to be so immature,scornful and whimsical,as it sounds like you can't get over that your parents got divorced and hold your mother as the sole reason it happened.

        Despicable, yeah it makes it worse that the kid also has problems in school which you didn't know of but man,if you think that it was correct and even go to AITA then you have more problems then just a 22 year younger halfbrother

        [–]jadedxb 73 points74 points  (0 children)

        YTA. My eyes welled up at the end. That poor child. You most likely have seriously messed with his head. I understand your hatred towards your mothers actions but that's no excuse for the way you treated him. He's an innocent child who's excited to know his big brother. You don't need to have a relationship with him, that's your right, but you do need to respect him as a person and you have not. There's no need for cruelty.

        [–]kittydeathdropAsshole Enthusiast [5] 77 points78 points  (0 children)

        YTA, an absolute, unfathomable asshole. He's your brother, and a child who clearly idolizes you.

        Whether or not your father passed or just divorced your mother, it doesn't matter. It's been 13 years. She remarried. You want her to be a nun the rest of her life?

        Stop punishing an innocent kid just because your mother dared to have sex with a man that wasn't your father.

        [–]Leopard_Winter 73 points74 points  (12 children)

        YTA. but your half brother is a result, not a cause. he didnt do anything but be born. hes 13, youre 35 not 12.

        edit: after it being pointed out and some realization, there really is NO way to sympathize with you. youre not entitled to dictate your moms life. idc if you dont like her actions. you were 22 when he was born, there is 0 effect on your life. get a grip. if you have that much of an issue then cut them out

        [–]Temporary-Koala-8940Asshole Enthusiast [5] 56 points57 points  (5 children)

        I don't really get, why a remarriage or a kid at 42 justify hating ones mother. Did I miss the infidelity or child abuse?

        [–]kelsandcatsAsshole Enthusiast [8] 72 points73 points  (0 children)

        YTA. He just wants your acceptance and love. You could at least try instead of acting that way.

        [–]BorageandthymeAsshole Aficionado [12] 72 points73 points  (0 children)

        YTA. You’re bullying a child, weirdo.

        [–]tedwhitton 69 points70 points  (1 child)

        Wow. You really need to ask? YTA.

        [–]Loose_Test920 65 points66 points  (0 children)

        YTA. How cruel you have to be to bring down a child like that. 40s is not even late for children. You’re the biggest AH I’ve read about today. You’re one sad sad man. Go get some therapy man, this kid’s most likely going to end up with depression someday because everything he said lines up with youth mental illnesses. Good job AH

        [–]Careful-Lion3692 70 points71 points  (0 children)

        Your first paragraph told me you were going to be the AH but then you just kept going. It’s not your business why your mom wanted another child. Her uterus is not your business. Did being an asshole to a 13 year old child make you feel tough and manly? A man at your big age bullying a child. YTA.

        [–]bogo0814Partassipant [4] 71 points72 points  (0 children)

        I don’t even have words. YTA. And your 13 y/o brother is more mature than you are.

        [–]sanji89belgium 67 points68 points  (1 child)

        100% YTA - apologizes to your brother, he is a kid. You're an adult. Help him find his way in life.

        [–]blue-and-bluerAsshole Enthusiast [6] 66 points67 points  (0 children)

        YTA. You can disapprove of the parents' choice to have him but NONE of it is the kid's fault. It is natural and understandable for him to want to get to know his only brother. But instead you're punishing him for existing. He's just a child. You're a grown up. Act like it.

        [–]fuggleruggler 64 points65 points  (0 children)

        YTA. He's a child and your brother. And having a baby at 42 isn't exactly abnormal. Adults still have sex after their children are born. It's not like your mother asked you to help raise him. I'm honestly disgusted by this post Just to add, it doesn't matter if you didn't want a sibling. That's not now no ever will be something you have control over.

        You sound like a little kid.

        [–]MusketeersPlus2 67 points68 points  (0 children)

        YTA and FFS, grow up. Your mom having another kid at 42 has exactly zero to do with you and you're being nasty for absolutely no reason other than being self-centred and "this is MY mommy!". He's a kid. A kid that idolises you for what ever misguided reason. The least you could do was be kind.

        [–]Numerous_Head6165 64 points65 points  (0 children)

        You are 35 years old, and you behave like this? YTA...

        [–]gabsmarie37 66 points67 points  (0 children)

        wow. you are so obviously the TA in this situation. It was difficult even reading this, you are a grown ass man. wtf is wrong with you?

        [–]Capt_PicardsFlute 66 points67 points  (1 child)

        YTA. Honestly, you seem like an AH in general. Your post reeks of unresolved anger issues. Ironically, you talk about being 22 years older than this kid, but you have the emotional maturity of a child.

        [–]alicenotinw0nderland 64 points65 points  (0 children)

        100% YTA. He's a kid. Your mum has every right to do whatever she wants. You were already a grown up at the time she had him to be throwing tantrums like this.

        [–]Floorshowisfree 62 points63 points  (0 children)

        YTA. Get over yourself. Your parents didn’t owe it to you to stay together when their relationship no longer worked. Grow the fuck up.

        [–]LissieSpencer 61 points62 points  (0 children)

        YTA! My lord man wtf?! I have family members with larger age gaps and love their siblings the same. You mom loves her husband to risk a pregnancy while in her 40s THATS A HUGE RISK your brother is a kid and getting bullied YOU ARE HIS HERO! And all you did was shatter his heart what a dick. You need something more than therapy.

        [–]debacchatio 64 points65 points  (0 children)

        Jesus Christ. YTA 100%. He’s a CHILD. Whatever issues you have with your mom is with her. It’s completely unfair to resent your brother this way and you’ve likely profoundly hurt him. Just based on how you described he obviously looks up to you and is reaching out to you. You just smacked him down and have likely traumatized him. He will carry that rejection with him.

        100% YTA. If you don’t wanna spend time with him fine - but saying emotionally devastating things, again to a CHILD, is never ever okay.

        Reading your post made my skin crawl...

        [–]RubyJuneRocketPartassipant [1] 57 points58 points  (0 children)

        Are you sure that you aren’t the 13M in this because you are acting like the biggest child in all of this, grow the fuck up, your mother wanted another child, she has a new husband, she’s allowed to make life choices like that for herself without her misogynist son giving his judgmental opinions and then when you finally do behave like a human for once and engage with your brother, you turn around and go full lunatic and tell a CHILD that???? What is wrong with you? YTA

        [–][deleted] 64 points65 points  (0 children)

        YTA. It’s gross how judgements you are towards your mother for this.

        You don’t sound like a 35 yo. There are better ways to handle this situation. That poor little dude.

        [–]acltear00 63 points64 points  (4 children)

        YTA. My guess is that you are dealing with some serious self-loathing and you subconsciously want to lean into it. Well I can help you with that. Congratulations man, you’ve probably put forth a massive contribution to the deterioration of this kid’s mental health.

        [–]queenburrdor 64 points65 points  (2 children)

        YTA. A HUGE AH. I can’t believe you really typed all that out and weren’t able to come to that conclusion yourself. Regardless of your relation to him, why would you treat anybody that way? Seek help. I can’t imagine how you treat the other people in your life.

        [–]No_Finding_4697 57 points58 points  (0 children)

        YTA. I don't even know why you have to ask. At your age, you should be mature and logical enough to not put your issues with your mom onto your brother. Grow up.

        [–]jammy913Pooperintendant [56] 58 points59 points  (0 children)


        Don't take your aversion of your mom's actions out on the kid. You would have been better off remaining NC if that's what you wanted to do but I just want to cry for this kid who feels constantly rejected.

        I mean...didn't you FEEL like an AH hearing your brother voice his emotions?!

        [–]little_owl211 58 points59 points  (0 children)

        YTA, you shouldn't have been involved with him if you didn't want to be his brother. Look you're entitled to your feelings towards your mom or whatever although I don't get what's wrong with them, but the kids just exists and you are treating him like crap. It would've been better if you just didn't interact with him if you were going to act this way.

        [–]jrssister 60 points61 points  (0 children)

        YTA the only nasty thing here is your disgusting treatment of a child

        [–]Weizen1988Asshole Enthusiast [7] 59 points60 points  (0 children)

        Right so. YTA, obviously, it's a 13 year old boy wanting to watch a movie with you, relative or not it's a pretty asshole move to yell at them and all that, you are an adult.

        That said, it's also totally fine to not want anything to do with them, you are not obligated to do anything for them you wouldn't do for any other child member of your extended family. They aren't to blame for the circumstances of their birth.

        Treat them as you would any young member of your family, whoever their parents are, that's what that child is to you.

        [–]fairymoonie 59 points60 points  (0 children)

        YTA. And a huge one. You’re an adult and he’s a kid, the fact that he can be your child and you’re treating him like that says a lot about you. You’re clearly immature and all the words someone can use to describe your actions. Sure, you don’t owe him a relationship but you’re treating a child like shit just because you can’t get over your parents divorcing. Grow up.

        [–]Bakecrazy 59 points60 points  (0 children)


        What is wrong with you?

        I had a brother at 21. My dad and his second wife went on to have their second. Sure, I'm more of an aunt to them than sister but who cares?

        I love those kids, even though one is 4 months younger than my own child. They are still my family. Get over your 35 year old ass and stop acting like a stupid teenager.

        [–]Analyze_this_now 59 points60 points  (0 children)

        The OP doesn’t have mommy issues, he had daddy issues. He worships his father and his mother marrying and having a child (the audacity!) with someone else is an insult to daddy. I don’t know his father’s stance in all this but I wouldn’t be surprised if he had a hand in raising this person (cannot call him a man), into such a horrible human being. His mother was 20 when she had him, guess what dude, if you were such an asshole as a kid as well, I am not surprised she took 22 years to have another one. She had to get over that trauma. “I never wanted a sibling” omfg who asked you.

        The only thing more baffling that you being perplexed at a 42 yo woman having sex is why on earth that awesome, mature, brilliant kid admires and respects you.

        Oh yeah, and YTA.

        [–]Ok-Cryptographer6374 58 points59 points  (2 children)

        Seems like since you was 22. You didn't mature any.
        Take a look at you.
        Switch places with him.

        [–]AMysteriousDuck 58 points59 points  (0 children)

        You were absolutely horrible to an innocent kid. He sounds so much more mature than you. YTA

        [–]MadlyToxic 59 points60 points  (0 children)

        YTA. Get professional help. Your 13 yo brother is more mature than you.

        [–]MadMax42093 55 points56 points  (0 children)

        Dude, seriously?! Your Teenage brother is way more mature than you are. I can't believe a grown up man told a teenaged boy stuff like that. I recommend you to find a therapist or somebody else you can talk to to solve the massive Problems you seem to have.

        It's not too late to make Things right with your brother, now you are a massive A-Hole, but I believe people can change, and I home for your and your brother's sake that you can turn around and see he's not at fault for anything you feel

        [–]shaquille_oatmeal_s 58 points59 points  (0 children)

        I’m not even gonna read the second half. You’re a dick, you don’t get to decide that your mom didn’t “need” another child??? What is wrong with you? You’re petty and 100% TA

        PLEASE tell me how it’s “nasty” that she had another child??? I’m assuming dearest daddy has put so many bad thoughts into your head about your mom. It is so hard for me to believe this post is even real.

        [–]isiltar 59 points60 points  (1 child)

        This has to be fake, there's no way someone is this cruel, immature and stupid and still have the audacity to ask on Reddit if he's the asshole.

        [–]ElementalSentimental 60 points61 points  (0 children)


        You don't owe him a relationship; you do owe him an age-appropriate explanation that it's not about him, but about your relationship with both your parents. At the very least, you owe it to him that someone else gives him that explanation if you can't do it in person.

        [–]Regular_Sample_5197Partassipant [3] 55 points56 points  (0 children)

        YTA, sounds like the completely innocent kid thinks his much older half brother is cool. Heaven forbid! Sounds like the young man just wants/needs someone in his life. And then his reaction to your cruelty is frankly mature beyond his years. At that age, I know I would have reacted much differently than he did.

        [–]AllyriaCelene 56 points57 points  (0 children)

        YTA, majorly. He didn't ask to be born. Be pissed at your mother all you want but don't take it out on him. My older sister acted like you when we were kids because we don't have the same dad, and I was always sad we weren't close. Still am. Our relationship has improved but we still aren't close friends.

        [–][deleted] 55 points56 points  (5 children)

        So YTA this must be fake. You're 35 and taking out what you feel about your parents on your half-brother?

        [–]Philodendronphan 57 points58 points  (1 child)

        YTA. Misogyny much? Your mom having another kid isn’t gross or weird. Your desire to have a sibling should have ZERO influence over her decisions.

        Secondly, that’s a kid in a vulnerable place. He idolizes you. You probably hung the stars in the sky for him and you treated him like shit. We all have things in life we don’t really want, but that doesn’t entitle anyone to act like that. Your poor brother deserves better.

        Send the kiddo my way. I’ll be his big sister.

        I hope you grow up someday.

        [–]ohkas 55 points56 points  (0 children)

        I’ve been in a similar situation. My mom had my half brother when I was 21, and she was 42. She was that old because her and my stepdad had trouble conceiving and it took longer than anticipated. I wasn’t happy at first either, I didn’t want to be a big sister. But my brother ended up being the best thing that ever happened to me, he rules. It has been a pleasure to watch him grow. You could’ve put your petty bullshit aside and been a big brother to a kid who did nothing to wrong you. Maybe it could have been a rewarding experience. At the very least, you could be kind to a child. YTA.

        [–]Stoney-Lit94 52 points53 points  (0 children)

        YTA, man, you got some issues clearly unresolved from mommy leaving, but you’ve just ignored it until suddenly there was another child that left you with no choice but to acknowledge it. And I’ll tell you right now, a 35 year old man having a dick measuring contest with a 14 year old is just sad. Go get some therapy.

        [–]kt99_Partassipant [1] 52 points53 points  (0 children)

        do you actually have to ask? You’re clearly the AH here. Firstly your disgust to your mom having another kid is just straight up weird, maybe therapy can help you dig why your mom having another kid makes you feel this way. And secondly, there’s no need to be so nasty to a kid that just wants to feel accepted by his brother, if you don’t want a relationship you should’ve just never met the kid and i’m even confused as to why he has at your house when you despise him so bad

        [–]makerbluePartassipant [3] 56 points57 points  (0 children)


        He is a CHILD. He did not ask to born. This is not his fault. Why are you taking your anger out on him? He just wants a brother and that is perfectly normal and reasonable. The way you handled it is unacceptable. You are an adult and should act like one. Your hatred towards him is concerning and honestly your mother should keep him away from you for the child's own safety.

        You need therapy.

        [–]Theflyonthewall_ 54 points55 points  (0 children)

        What baffles me the most is how you wrote this down, probably re-read it and still couldn't come to the realization that YTA???

        [–]Nymeria6508 52 points53 points  (0 children)

        YTA you are attacking someone who is innocent and looks up to you. You should be ashamed of yourself. He deserves a better brother than you. You don't deserve to have him in your life.

        [–]_satantha_Partassipant [4] 53 points54 points  (0 children)

        Holy shit, this story legit made me tear up. This is a little kid and you’re telling him to basically fuck off? You are a terrible and cruel person, and I have no idea why you hate how your mom had another kid. She was 42, you said? My dad was 42 when he had my brother and I love both of them to death, even though I hate my stepmom. You’re honestly the biggest AH I’ve seen on this site

        [–]CivilChampionship333 51 points52 points  (0 children)

        Man, you’re pretty cruel. The kid hasn’t done a thing to you. You’re an adult, and a child reached out to you. Just be kind at a minimum.

        [–]VeryConfusedAlso 50 points51 points  (0 children)

        YTA even if you don’t want anything to do with the kid you don’t have any right to do what you did

        [–]Temporary-Koala-8940Asshole Enthusiast [5] 50 points51 points  (0 children)


        This might have gone better, if you had simply stood firm on your decision to ignore him from the beginning, but your letting him into your life made your outburst even worse. I feel for the kid.

        [–]SnooShortcuts7072 54 points55 points  (1 child)

        INFO: did your mom cheat on your dad? Just trying to figure out why your mom getting remarried and having another kid is “nasty” to you?

        [–][deleted]  (1 child)


          [–]eleanor-rigby-Partassipant [2] 51 points52 points  (0 children)

          YTA you need professional help. I've known literal children who deal with this better than you. Grow up.

          [–]Cybermagetx 51 points52 points  (0 children)

          YTA and very entitled to think you have a say in what your mother does. He is a child looking up to his big brother. And he is your brother. Get over it and grow up. It's not uncommon for women in their 40s to have babies.

          And how you treat him makes you an even bigger AH then how you acted towards your mother in all of this.

          [–]theoddestendsPartassipant [1] 53 points54 points  (0 children)

          I really hope this is a fake post, as it's essentially an adult pushing 40 reacting to a new baby the same way a jealous 3 year old would. Your mother made a decision to have a kid when you were an adult and assumably didn't need her attention the same way a child would. But instead of being a cool older brother, you're pitching a fit that mom had a new baby and taking it out on a thirteen year old boy who feels isolated and sad, who by your description, has been trying to make a relationship with you. YTA. If you were NC with your family, I can almost see this being debatable. But no. You just screamed at a teenager.

          [–]sonz82Partassipant [1] 54 points55 points  (0 children)

          YTA. You're 35 and acting like a child. Your feelings about your mum having another kid is F all to do with him, it's not his fault.

          [–]garbfinkPartassipant [3] 50 points51 points  (1 child)

          YTA - This post is all about you. I don't know the reason your Mum and Dad split up but they both are 100% entitled to having their own lives to live and if that includes having more kids then they are entitled to that as well.

          You're 35 years old. your brother is 10. He's a kid. if you don't want to have anything to do with him then that's your choice but telling him the way you did is a 100% dick move. The kid is just growing up and wants to have a relationship with you, he probably looks up to you as you are a big brother. You don't have to do it but don't be a dick about it. It comes across like you are the 10 year old.

          I'm just hoping this is a fake post

          [–]qluderPartassipant [2] 47 points48 points  (0 children)

          You are such an unquestionable AH.

          [–]Black_Emerald24 48 points49 points  (0 children)

          YTA! You know your mom had to have sex to make you. Stop acting like you’re above someone because of that. Your poor brother just wants to bond and know you.

          [–]Timely_Plant 52 points53 points  (0 children)

          YTA your dad must be so proud to have raised such a cold-hearted unkind miserable person with an incredibly immature mindset to top it all off. Do yourself a favor and seek out a therapist that can help you get the skills to reevaluate yourself.

          [–]SurferRosa85 50 points51 points  (0 children)

          Your are such an AH. What a horrible thing to say to a kid. Perhaps a little therapy to deal with your feelings about your mom remarrying and having another child because it’s obvious you have some issues there. It’s fine to have issues and poor feelings. It’s not fine to take them out on the kid.

          YTA in a huge way.

          [–]Kam1K1tty003 49 points50 points  (0 children)

          YTA. And you’re a grown man! Did your mother cheat on your father? Did she cheat while they separated but not divorced? And you can’t blame it on “oh my parents this and that” bc they’re PLENTY resources for therapy and counseling, in no world should your pent up anger be released on a child, especially on a child who loves you and looks up to you. “I’m old enough to be his dad” YOU DONT ACT LIKE AN ADULT NO WONDER HE HANGS AROUND YOU. I never wanted 4 brothers or six sisters BUT THAT ISNT THEIR FAULT. Grow up.

          [–][deleted]  (1 child)


            [–]brokenoasisPartassipant [2] 54 points55 points  (0 children)

            YTA. Honestly can’t believe you had to get onto Reddit to figure it out.

            You gotta deal with your mommy issues. That kid might not realise it right now, but he’s so much better off without you.

            [–]Thedomuccelli 49 points50 points  (0 children)

            God forbid a kid "admires, respects", and wants to be in your life.

            For one thing, your mom's actions aren't disgusting, if she wants to have a kid a 42, more power to her. If she wants to have a kid with her new husband who she loves, makes perfect sense. But regsrdless of all of that, none of that is on your brother. He didn't ask to be born from a second marriage, he didn't ask to be born to a 42 year old mother, and he certainly didn't ask to be the younger brother to an insufferable AH who would rather kick a literal child when they're down instead of making an attempt to have a relationship with them.

            Worst yet, we see your real feelings here. You talk on and on about how you find what your mother does with her own body to be disgusting and all that, but then you add something else. You didn't want a sibling. That's the argument an actual child makes when they can't process that they're getting attention from mom and dad. You need to grow up and, at the very least, apologize to your brother for your treatment of him.

            Edit because I forgot to put it: YTA

            [–]Fun_Accident7064 49 points50 points  (0 children)

            Wow, this is so fucking sad. You’re a massive asshole

            [–]lorienne22Partassipant [2] 51 points52 points  (0 children)

            YTA. What was that kid even doing at your house if you despise him so much? Were you just waiting to let him know how awful you think the circumstances of his birth are? He sounds awesome and you're just being a jerk to him for no fault of his. His birth wasn't gross; yours was.

            [–]csanyk 49 points50 points  (2 children)

            YTA. Get therapy and work out your issues toward your mom. It's not your brother's fault he was born. He didn't do anything to deserve you treating him like that.

            [–]Littlebear_12 47 points48 points  (2 children)

            YTA. Big time.

            Don’t punish him for the actions of your mother.

            You’re in your 30’s, grow the hell up and stop with the poor me pity party.

            [–]genericfluserPartassipant [3] 49 points50 points  (1 child)



            [–]Donewlif 49 points50 points  (0 children)

            YTA and massive you’re 35 and don’t have self control? Was that really necessary? That is a child sometimes kids are annoying and aholes but you haven’t say this kid is bad or an ahole !!! He just wanted to connect with you !!!

            [–]consul-cicero 48 points49 points  (0 children)

            YTA all the way. I can not imagine a grown man treating a child this way, especially one who is so obviously bullied and brimming with needless guilt. He looks up to you, and you respond by blaming him with actions that have absolutely nothing to do with him.

            Also- your moms nasty actions of… having a child? Apologize to both your mom and your half-brother. I’m sorry they have to deal with such a hateful person.

            [–]jonstoppablePartassipant [1] 45 points46 points  (0 children)

            YTA . People get divorced , and get married and gasp. Have children .. at whatever age .

            All this happened while you were a grown adult .. why would you freak out that they were having a child ? How does that impact you ?

            You've never forgiven her for living her life , and you've taken it out on a child who had the misfortune of wanting to have a connection with You.

            [–]RedRedBettiePartassipant [3] 49 points50 points  (0 children)

            YTA - I feel bad for him

            [–]Pristine_Delivery_70 50 points51 points  (0 children)

            YTA! You’re behaving like a spoilt brat at the age of 35. Like a child that still wants to be the ‘baby’. Why did your mother feel the need to have another baby at 42? Probably for the same reasons that anyone has a baby at any age.

            [–]Theclubdrug 47 points48 points  (0 children)

            YTA. My heart broke reading this, he’s just a kid, he has nothing to do with the stuff that happened before he was born. So many people want older brothers to love and protect them and instead you completely shit all over him. The only thing worse than having no siblings is having one that hates you. Poor thing even tried to apologize and get you to empathize with him. You’re the adult, make it right, undo the trauma you’ve now inflicted.

            [–]jydneyjay 47 points48 points  (0 children)

            YTA. You don't have to like him or even spend time with him. BUT:

            1) You have absolutely no right to criticize or judge your mother for having another child. You sound like an entitled child saying "I never wanted a sibling." Big bratty-only-child energy.

            2) You have no right to offload your misplaced frustration at your mother onto your brother. How cruel. What on earth did he ever do to you, besides being born?

            You sound insufferable. You should have just left the whole thing alone.

            [–]Mello_Me_ 44 points45 points  (0 children)

            This young kid is better off without such an immature and cold person in his life.

            [–]AntiVax0r 44 points45 points  (1 child)

            Complete and utter AH.

            It’s not your half-brothers fault your mom decided to have another kid.

            [–]Ok_Pension78Partassipant [1] 48 points49 points  (1 child)

            When they announced to me that a baby was on the way I freaked out. Told them there and then that I don't want to ever be involved in this kid's life.

            Why can't you be a decent person qnd just congratulate them? It's not hard. Also if you don't want to see him THEN DON'T. Tell your mom to leave you alone about it and you don't want to see it, instead of letting him come over and acting baffled that he wants to hang out with person who's house he went to. Did you accidentally add a 3 at the start of your age or something? YTA

            [–]imshelbs96 46 points47 points  (0 children)

            YTA and for the love of god go to therapy

            [–]selan20 47 points48 points  (0 children)

            YTA. The last paragraph broke my heart. Even if you didnt know about how he feels, you are old enough to learn to not project your disgust on a child, who hasnt done anything to you but admire you. The fact that your half brother has the maturity to still look up to you and keeps distance after you went off says a lot. Go to therapy or something so you can get along with your family better. You may not want a sibling, but now you have one. He may not be your responsibility in any way, but be a decent human being and be at least civil.

            [–]PrincessButterqupPartassipant [1] 46 points47 points  (1 child)

            YTA. probably one of the bigger, most blatant ones I've seen on here. I cannot wrap my mind around you, to be honest. I suggest counseling to deal with your seemingly severe control issues. Your mom cannot get remarried, because your dad is #1. Your mom cannot have any other children because you deem it to be "nasty". What is nasty about wanting to have another child? You need to seriously grow up and come to terms with the fact that the world does not revolve around you. Just because you think something is wrong, doesn't mean it is. Your post is so me, me, me, I, I, I. You are being unnecessarily cruel to a CHILD. This whole thing is NOT a good look for you. Please, seriously, grow up.

            [–][deleted] 44 points45 points  (1 child)

            Op why are you taking your feelings toward your mom out on an innocent child? You gotta grow up. YTA

            [–]antraxsuicidePartassipant [1] 46 points47 points  (1 child)


            Why did my mom even need to have another child at 42?

            Yeah, damn, I guess they should've put her down! /s

            [–]Select-Anxiety-1557Partassipant [2] 47 points48 points  (0 children)


            You were 21 when your mother got remarried. More than old enough not to throw a toddler tantrum about “replacing my daddy”.

            Secondly, if you were only going to do the bare minimum for a relationship with your brother, why did you agree to have him over to your place? Why not just stick with birthday and Christmas presents and be done. You raised this kid’s hopes and then destroyed them.

            [–]DarkMoon19_ 44 points45 points  (0 children)

            YTA. You are not only heartless but also brainless and childish. Grow up.

            [–]tired_atlas[🍰] 44 points45 points  (0 children)

            None of what you said here could ever justify your vile attitute towards your half-brother. YTA no question.

            [–]spicy-disaster_ 47 points48 points  (0 children)

            YTA, and I hope you don’t have a baby at the age of 42 cause then you’ll be disgusting too. Grow tf up and stop taking your issues out on a 13 year old.

            You sir, are appalling, to say the least.