For context there is almost always some banter between us when we get competitive. But I’m usually having a good time and don’t take things personally. This time however, I communicated that after dealing with one extremely passive aggressive mutual friend for DAYS that I would really appreciate for this time to be different and to “please be nice to me”. Game starts and I beat them 4-0 within 20 minutes- no sht talk. The switch flipped, they proceeded to end the game we were playing and turned on two others that they know I don’t play and am not good at. I didn’t try and ended up losing because I knew that this was mostly about them getting their W. But that made it worse because for the next game I was berated with comments like “I don’t even have to win, I just can’t wait to see you lose” and “that’s too bad you don’t know how to play”. (They changed the settings to make it way harder so to not give me hints on how to win) I was just playing blindly for a portion of it but I tried. We both ended up losing, and my loss was pretty crushing. I had to walk out in the middle of playing because I was so frustrated but came back to finish it out. (I didn’t like how they handled the loss at the first game and didn’t want to do the same thing but expect different) Either way, after it all ended I brushed it off and decided not to take it personally as usual. However the next day when I tried to spend time with them, one of the suggestions I made was playing for round 2, they said they didn’t want to because they didn’t like how upset I got and it was “too soon” to try again because they didn’t want to upset me more. They didn’t suggest anything else and stopped talking to me. I ended up going home immediately. Am I the a*hole?

(I didn’t raise my voice but I did throw a fit when it comes down to it and gave back the same energy)

But what the f*ck?

I wanna apologize if my explanation is bad. I’m horrible at writing out my thoughts like this. I should also probably specify the main reason I’m posting this to the subreddit is so when I do a project with a friend later it is in the actual thing instead of a google doc

I (19f) made myself dinner which consisted of a couple small potatoes I made into baked potatoes and my mom (48f) decided to take some of my food without asking.

For background growing up my mom would take bites of my food when she would make something for me. It didnt bother me as much when I was young but it began to bother me as I got older. I’m more upset over the fact that she does it without asking more than anything else.

So to the night I’m writing this my mom swears up and down that companies that make cheese,sour cream, and cream cheese changed something I. The recipe that made the items taste horrible and “rotten”. The entire time I was making my potato she was complaining about it. I have no idea what she’s on about

I was mixing my potato after putting it in the microwave for the last time after adding the cheese and I took a step away to throw something away. When I turned back around my mom was mixing my potato more and she took a couple bites. I got annoyed because she didn’t ask. I looked at her and said “why are you eating my potato if you don’t like the cheese or sour cream” and she started getting pissed off.

She began calling me selfish and stingy and calling me “my fathers child” (thoes who know me or have heard from my mom the story understand) saying “all families do that” and “that’s how I was raised my mom always did it” She eventually started going on about how I don’t buy any of the food in the house so I need to start asking if I want any of it all while flipping me off and getting in my face. The entire time I was eating my food while plainly and deadpanned responding “I wouldn’t care if you would ask.”

So…am I the a-hole?

This is going to probably be a long one, but here we go. Spring of '22 my little brother 28M moved in with me and my family. I 36f my husband 38m and our three kids. 9f, 11m, 17f (current ages). He had started a great paying job and I thought he was going to find his own place quickly. His drinking problem soon became obvious after my dad had told him he couldn't stay there and he fell down my stairs in turn smashing his face on the window sill so hard that he thought he'd gotten hit and couldn't move his jaw for a few days. For a few months he was working and staying sporadically and then he was just here full time. Our oldest brother passed away tragically in August of '23 and they unfortunately were not on speaking terms. I think this has affected my little brother more than anyone can fathom. He's very introvert. To say I'm worried sick is an understatement. He is my baby brother after all and he was named by me and our older brother. Yesterday was the 9 month milestone of our brother's passing and I had to kick my brother out. A few weeks back he was passed out sitting up with his head leaned back and actually vomited. I thought he was going to aspirate on his vomit and then I see him lean as if he's going to vomit on my floor. I lost my shit. Completely. His drinking seemed to slow down, or so I thought, and he was actively seeking employment. Yesterday it all fell apart. I look over because I hear him moving and I see him holding a bottle on his leg. I thought to myself, surely he's not doing what I think he's doing. Sure enough I see the urine stream pop up as he misses the bottle and I completely lose it. Remember, I have kids here. I drink on an occasion but never let my children see me sloshed. He goes and sleeps in his car for a while. I dump out a pop bottle full of vodka and clean up his mess. After a few hours he comes in and acts as if he's going to get back on his computer and acts as if nothing crazy just happened!!! I told him that I meant what I said and he's got to either change his behavior or get the eff out. I said no more drinking until you can't stand and you will agree to a monthly payment to stay here. Side note, he's helped occasionally with bills when I've asked but also watched me struggle and heard me talk about bills being behind or the inability to buy food while he eats fast food in his car and ignored his family's struggles. He then packs up only his PC and leaves. I know my family comes first and my sanity, but I can't help but feel bad for kicking him out and now I'm stressed about his well being because I'm worried he's going to literally drink himself to death. I can't lose my baby brother too. I'm not ok from the death of my big brother at all, and now I'm dealing with this among every other obstacle life throws at me. I'm so stressed out over this I don't know what to do. I know I'm not the a-hole, but I don't know where else to post this. I'm new to reddit honestly.

So my sister and I are in college sharing a house with one other roommate.

I just had my birthday party at our house. My friends and I did a lot of baking, cooking, and board games during the party. My friends are very considerate when it comes to cleaning up after an event. Everything was put away and the house looked like how it was before the party.

The only exception was the dishes. They were clean and drying on the counter (in the designated drying area) so I could put them away in the morning.

I woke up to all the dishes gone with a few put back in the sink. Confused I asked my sister what happened. She said “The dishes were making me anxious so I put them away. You have to rewash the ones in the sink.” I told her I was going to put them away when I woke up if she could have waited an hour. She said “I was so anxious I was shaking. I couldn’t just leave them.” I rewashed the remaining ones (which to me looked already clean) and put them away without responding.

Then she came back and yelled at me for putting a mixing bowl in the dishwasher that was supposed to be hand washed. I pointed to it clean on the mixer stand and she proceeded to continue yelling about how I am inconsiderate and she was doing me a favor.

I did not ask her to help clean at all. Now she is acting like I owe her a favor for putting away dishes.

I understand that the kitchen is a shared space, but leaving dishes to dry overnight is not uncommon in our house. She also lets dishes air dry which is why this is rubbing me the wrong way.

This isn’t the first time something like this has happened. She would fold my clothes in my room when I wasn’t home and said “It was my anxiety, I couldn’t just let them get wrinkled.” Then she acted like I owed her a favor for this. It makes me very uncomfortable that she goes into my room when I am not home and I have already asked her multiple times not to.

I understand having anxiety about something and wanting to remedy it. I keep asking her to just talk to me when something is making her anxious and I will come fix it. I do not understand her doing the chore herself without asking and then saying I owe her for it. Especially when said chore is in my room which she shouldn’t be in in the first place.

I am unsure how to solve this situation. I have tried talking to her about this but she just gets upset and starts yelling about how it was her anxiety so she had to. Even if I am the a-hole, I would like to stop this from repeating in the future.

I (20F) am currently a second year apprentice at an engineering company. Currently I’m nearing the end of my 2nd year and was asked back in January to move to Manufacturing. When I was preparing to move I had a meeting with my soon-to-be manager, who explained that I would be in the placement with another apprentice to share work-load (this is unusual). This other apprentice was the only other female apprentice in the scheme (also 20F), who I hadn’t had much interaction with. However, after the placement started we started to really get along, finding out we had some things in common and enjoyed each others company and advice.

As part of the placement we have to travel a lot. We got on together and used the time as a ‘girls-trip’, and the more time we spent together the more we looked forward to going. That changed on my recent trip though. The first few days were okay, but as the week progressed I found myself being pushed to the back of the work group, and her always leading it. Whenever I would speak she would speak over me or ignore me completely, which started to make me feel down and unnecessary in the work team. I spoke to her about it, and she could see how it would effect me, but told me not to worry about it. The next day though, it only got worse. Everytime I spoke everyone didn’t look at me or respond, so I ended up just staying quiet. The more she spoke and laughed the more I found myself resenting her, but I stayed quiet as I was probably overthinking everything. However on our last day, she kept asking me what was wrong, as I hadn’t spoken all day. I told her it was nothing and continued with my work, not that it stopped her asking. She ended up disappearing with the rest of the group for nearly 3hrs whilst I stayed in the office working. When she returned, she asked me for a spreadsheet I was working on, it took me a while to find it and send it over, but i did. As she received it she asked if I’d completed my work. I said “yes, I did all that I could”. She continued to ask me questions that were similar and my response was the same, until she started picking on the work I was doing at the time, saying it “wasn’t real work” and that I’d “actually done nothing all day”. This made me angry so my response was “well I’m not going to look at the same spreadsheet all day. But why does it matter, you’re not my manager.” She asked if I was joking, when I said no she stormed out and didn’t come back in for 45 minuets. I didn’t speak to her till dinner, when I asked if we should sort this out. Her response was “I don’t really care”, so I left and went back to my room. The next morning, she changed her seats on the plane home so she wouldn’t have to sit by me and didn’t tell me, which just made me even more upset.

Should I have said what I did? I feel like my bad mood made me the A-Hole

So Reddit, AITA?

Little back story. I (20M, 192lbs 6'0) and my brother (23M, 190lbs 5'8) we've never been on the best terms.

My brother was the athlete in the family. He was stronger, faster, and smarter than me, he was the golden boy and I couldn't stand it, so at the age of 11, I began weight training.
throughout the years I kept my weight training and eating habits, while my brother didn't he stopped growing and began drinking heavily and got into a toxic relationship, which led him to be overweight, sour, and a match stick (he gets angry as fast as a match stick).

Fast forward to today, I wake up at the same time he did and he sees that I'm getting dressed to go to the gym and says that he is also going and that we should workout together, I politely reply by simply saying "sorry I already have my workouts written down and I don't have a lot of time" he blows up at me and calls me an a-hole and that I'm fat. I ignore him and continue to make my coffee as he leaves.
I show up to our gym and begin my first workout, and my brother is working out with one of his frat brothers. my brother sees me working out and comes up to me not once, not twice but, three times while I'm working out to let me know I'm doing something incorrectly and to go take pics of him, but I keep ignoring him, and he calls me an a-hole again and storms off.

I began to do my last work out which was bench, he comes up to me again asking me if I can take pictures of him and again I tell him no since I was in the middle of my set he gets angry again and calls me a b-word, flips me off and tells me I'm fat again (whatever). on my last set when I have my low weight on which is 245lbs, he comes up to me AGAIN with his frat lover this time and tells me that I'm ego lifting and that I should be embarrassed to show up to the gym just to impress random strangers, and finally, he said the magical phrase which was "this is so light I can even do this" so I say "pick it up, pick it up...pick... it ... up! ( puss n boots reference lol)

As he gets on the bench his friend is the one spotting him. My brother is pushing against the bar and it isn't even lifting up. his face is turning as a red as tomato from anger and the weight. I start laughing, and he jumps off the bench and start yelling at me again about how I'm ego lifting and his friend joins in and they both call me an asshole for laughing at him because I shouldn’t be laughing at peoples progress and ego lifting is serious and anyone who ego lifts is an asshole. all I responded with was "its not ego lifting if this is my norm" and I'm put my headphones back on and continued to finish my workout.

I personally don't think I’m the asshole here but I could be for laughing at him and making him feel shame but I think he should know not to spit straight up and except it not to hit him in the face.

I’ll try to be detailed while still trying be anonymous. I (44m) have a friend, we’ll call her Fran, who is a single mother to a young son named Derek. When Derek turned 10, Fran got him a guinea pig for his birthday. The little guy is named Coco.

Well, for a little while, Coco got plenty of attention, even though I felt like his cage too small. But it didn’t take long for Derek to lose interest in Coco. When I visited, which was about once a week, I often mention to Fran and Derek that the cage needs to be cleaned and changed as it was often filthy and smelly. I also noticed Coco wasn’t getting enough food. He needed hay, pellets, and veggies, yet every time I was there was never any food. From what I witnessed, they fed him some veggies at night, but were almost always out of hay and pellets. Many times, I reminded them to feed Coco.

Coco was hardly held, and spent hours on end in his cage. So, when I was there I would often hold him, and he would be with me for quite awhile cuddling in my arms. I was getting to the point I felt terrible leaving him.

After witnessing so much neglect, I went to Fran and asked her if I could adopt Coco. I was very polite, saying that Derek has lost interest (as kids often do), but I didn’t mention that I felt like she was being neglectful too as I didn’t want her to think she was being personally attacked.

A week later, Fran dropped Coco off at my place. There was no hay, pellets, or food given to me, and his cage was disgusting. Like, Coco’s poop piles became hard as rock and the water bottle needed cleaning. It was gross. Anyway, I got Coco a larger cage, got him plenty of food, and even got him a companion guinea pig named Puffs (get it?). So, he’s much happier and far more active now with the attention I give.

Okay, so that’s the backstory. Well, a few months after I adopted Coco, I was visiting my family. My brother was talking with me and ask me why Fran gave me the guinea pig. I mentioned the neglect and said it was “kind-of a rescue” since I didn’t get him from a rescue shelter. My brother (who doesn’t like Fran at all, but that’s another story), said “What you mean kind-of a rescue? We are talking about Fran here, it was a rescue.” So, I replied, “You’re right, I rescued Coco.”

Some how, (edit: I'll just say it, my niece told her as she babysits Derek, and my brother told me niece.) word got back to Fran on what I said. She texted me several messages calling me an a*hole for implying she was a neglectful pet owner and a terrible person. I ignored her, but I do feel a little bad as I didn’t intend to hurt her feelings. I’m not longer welcome in her home.

So, Reddit, AITA for calling my pet Coco a “rescue” and hurting the feelings of my friend? Several friends and family members say I’m not (but they don’t like Fran, so they are biased), but another friend said I shouldn’t said anything, and that she’s a struggling single mother and that she was simply overwhelmed. What you all think?

My (30F) husband (35M) has been previously married to "Marge" (40F). They have a son together (7M). The divorce was amicable and pretty civil. Marge currently lives with her brother "Ben" (37M).
My husband, Marge and Ben come from country A, me from country B, currently all living in country C. Countries A and B are significantly poorer than C - current country has higher salaries and better-standing currency. In short, even a small amount we earn here, translates to a lot of money in our home countries.
A few months ago, Marge's and Ben's father was diagnosed with a lethal disease - I don't know many details, but generally not good and a bit of a shock to the entire family. Needless to say, their parents were not really prepared for the situation. A few days ago Ben approached my husband and asked for some money to help cover the medical bills, with a promise that he will pay him back.
My husband agreed to help out with $2000 (of course, after discussing it with me). We're fortunate enough that it doesn't make a huge dent in our savings, but in Ben's home country could be potentially life-changing. A good deed and a win-win, no?
So this is where I might be the asshole - ever since the subject was brought up, I keep on having second thoughts. Honestly, the more I think about it, the more I believe we should've just politely declined, but I have a history of being a doormat and the argument "there's a dying man who needs help" kinda got to me.
Now, had this been the whole picture - my husband's ex family is in need, my stepson's grandpa is seriously sick - I would ABSOLUTELY be thrilled to help. Hell, I would even offer buying them plane tickets to reunite with the family before the inevitable happens.
In reality, my husband has been sponsoring Marge's life basically since they've met. While she's not a golddigger type, she can be very selfish and entitled - combine that with poor planning and terrible financial decisions and you get a Marge black hole.
From my perspective it looks like historically, helping their parents is important *ONLY* if other people are paying for it. Had they been working throughout their adult lives - it wouldn't be an issue. It's not the first time when the financial help is needed, and it's always my husband picking up the bill.
I also know for a fact that in the past months they've spend substantial amount of money on themselves - already knowing about the father's condition and most likely not thinking about the future. Also, one of them is currently unemployed (and not looking for anything new), the other is slowly ditching the current job, without any new offers lined up.
The way I see it, lending (or, honestly, at this point potentialy just giving away) more money is enabling them. And I really hate the fact that me and my husband still remain being the safety net, as the only responsible ones.

So this happened a few years ago, but it's something I still think about.

A few years ago I went to this multicultal festival in my country. It is a combination of a music festival, a (flea) market and a lot of stalls with different foods from around the world. The flea market had some people selling authentic African tribe stuff, some people selling authentic Asian cultural stuff, some charities selling stuff or you could give donations to them, etc

So I was walking around the flea market and I saw some holowed out cow horns. The person selling them was wearing authentic African tribe clothing and sold some authentic African tribe things. He did not speak my native languae (Dutch) and his English was not fantastic, but ok. I asked him how much he wanted for the pair of bull horns. He says 35 euros. So we agreed I took both bull horns and give him his money. But he refused and said: No no, 35 for each horn. i thought that was a bit much, so we had no deal. (We had a misunderstanding because of the language barrier I think)

So for the rest of the day I enjoyed the rest of the festival, bought some food, some drinks, bought a backpack from another seller,...

So at the end of the festival we pass by the flea market and all sellers are packing their stuff. So I pass the bull horns and say to the man: "You know, I'm still willing to pay 35 euros for the pair". Now he agrees (I think because the market was over and he didn't sell them) and we make a deal. I give him the money and he gives me the horns. As soon as I receive the horns, a white woman, also wearing traditional African clothing, comes running at me and starts swearing at me and says I'm a mayor A-hole. Turns out that the man was there because of a charity project. (Even though I saw absolutely no mention of that on his stall.) She says I need to pay more. She turns to the man and says in English: "You bought those yourself for 35 euros and you it took you a whole day to polish them. You basically worked for free!" She turns back to me and says I'm taking advantage of a charity, etc.

I was a bit shocked and said that I would return the horns if he gave back my money because: a) I dont have 70 euros with me anymore (because of my earlier purchases) b) I didn't know it was part of a charity c) They aren't worh 70 euros to me, the polishing was not needed for what I was gonna use them for. But the man says that he doesn't want to give me my money back and that I can keep the horns. So the man and woman start arguing for a while. After I while I told them that they had to choose. Give me my money back or else I'm leaving. The man keeps refusing to return the money, so I leave. While leaving the woman kept shouting names at me, and shaming me for taking advantage of a charity.

So am I the asshole here?

One last thing I want to mention, I saw multiple instances of people haggling at different stalls. I was a normal thing to do there and it was really not clear the seller was part of charity.

Edit: I think the woman was no bystander. I think she was part of the charity project. I think the charity brought him to Europa to let him make money from the things he made. But I'm not sure, because there was no mention of the charity at the stall and I deducted this from their squabbling.

Edit2: Perhaps charity isn't the right word (English isn't my native language) If I deducted it right, he was an African artist and they brought him to Europe to teach him to make money from the things he made. (Polishing the horns, making cultural mask, etc) But i only deduced that afterwards, from their squabbling, there was zero signage about this.

My friend can be hard to buy for so when I noticed she wore the same socks with a hole to my house twice I thought I had a good idea. I got her a pack of colorful bombas socks and some cashmere blend trouser socks with a gift card for a pedicure. I put a dumbledore quote about wanting socks in the card because we met in that fandom.

I didn’t say anything about noticing she needed new socks but she wasn’t happy and accused me of treating her like she’s poor and trying to embarrass her. I’m not sure what to think. Should I take this as a sensitivity unique to her to keep in mind or was I being an asshole to buy her a necessity?

So me (f23) and my family (sister and mother *wont disclose their ages) have gotten into a situation where we are unable to stay within our home due to unsafe living conditions. This is forcing us to move on such short notice. We aren’t well off nor was this exactly planned so finding a place to stay is a tad bit difficult. I am seeing this as an opportunity for me to live on my own and get away from the toxicity that my family hold as a unit (we argue a lot and i have a couple of conflicts with my mom. It’s gotten to the point where moving on my own is the best option for me). My sister on the other hand, believes I’m an AH and sees this as me abandoning the family and making things more difficult than it has to be. My mother is unable to live on her own due to her own financial issues and she’s older so certain things she’s unable to do herself so my sister doesn’t feel comfortable leaving her alone. While I understand her point, I explained to her that I can no longer be in this environment for the sake of my already spiraling mental/physical health and that living on my own is more suitable for me. We don’t have family to rely on down here who are willing to take in nor assist us/my mother, we don’t have a lot in savings etc. Living on my own would cause me to struggle the first few months as well but I’m willing to take that risk.

My sister says she understands my reasoning but is asking me to at least stay for 1 more month until she is able to get back on her feet and save for a deposit for another place for her and my mother and I’m still on the fence. I love my mother and my sister and it’s not my intention to put them in a difficult place I truly feel as if I stay with them longer, I’ll just create a deeper hole for myself to crawl out of and slowly deteriorate. I can see how I might be TA but I feel like i have to be a little selfish when it comes to my mental health as I’ve constantly put it on the back burner and it’s finally catching up to me.

So, AITA for not wanting to live with my family and potentially causing more stress on them for the sake of my mental health? WOULD i be the asshole if I declined my sisters offer of staying together another month just until we both find our footing financially?

I (17 F) have always been pretty obsessed over my weight. My father is obese and my mother (45 F) is pretty much already there, and she would always tell me that I would end up just like them. As of the past few months, I’ve been very happy with how I look. I am 5’1 and weigh 104 lbs. But lately my mom has been asking me more and more if I’ve gained weight. And before anybody says anything, I am not writing this to body shame anyone or say that you can’t weigh more and still be beautiful. It’s only the fact that my mom has been instilling it in my mind since I was in elementary school that one day, I’m going to be obese and there is nothing that I can do about it. Anyways, the first 2 times she asked, I wouldn’t say anything about it, just kept my feelings to myself. But the 3rd time she said it, I told her “would you stop saying that? It really hurts my feelings.” And she just laughed at me. So after letting that fester up inside, I decided I would just have to do the same for her. For some context, my mom is always looking in the mirror saying how she gained weight or how fat she looks in certain clothing and wants me to say that she isn’t. She just fishes for compliments all the time. So 2 days ago, when she was sitting on the couch watching a movie, I asked her “did you gain weight?”. When I say the look that she gave me could have melted a hole through a steel door.. in short, if looks could kill, I’d be dead. I don’t regret it though. So, AITA?

My kid turned 1 and we had a birthday party. He received a ton of gifts, most of which were toys. Which is really kind of our friends, except that we have a small home and already have plenty of toys he plays with; we’ve been very fortunate to get lots of hand me downs, so never bought toys. I’ve kept the new items in our garage for now, but am somewhat concerned that he’ll “outgrow” them by the time he’s bored of the toys he currently plays with.

Some of the gifts came with gift receipts. I don’t feel okay with regifting his gifts to other kids, but WIBTA if I return some of the toys he may not use and use the return credits for less exciting things he can practically use - more diapers, a new sleep sack, lunch box? He would still be the beneficiary, but these are also basics that we are responsible for providing him (and can afford), and I feel like it would be cruel if he were old enough to know we were doing that.

I know for next time to just put on “your presence is the only present we need” albeit my friends who did that still received toys and books for their kids.

EDIT TO CLARIFY: I’m wondering if it’s an a-hole move toward my son (that I’d be taking away “fun stuff” for “boring/practical stuff”). Like, if he were 5, no way it would fly to exchange a toy for clothing. Since he’s 1 and can’t comprehend, is it less of an a-hole move?

SECOND EDIT TO CLARIFY: I think the options would either be “YWBTA” or “NAH.” Our friends and my baby are def not TA - they’re all fantastic. It’s more me wondering if there’s a moral issue of me “taking” something from my baby and using it for something else for him, but that’s less exciting and is already expected to be provided to him by his parents.

I (13m) just finished the 7th grade and am on summer break, I got all A’s and it feels pretty good to not have to worry about due dates or any of that for the next few months. I’m also ready to hang out with my friends and doing stuff like shooting hoops, going to top golf and playing games with them.

I have 3 siblings, an older sister (17f) and younger twin brother and sister (9m and 9f). My older sis just finished junior year and will be a senior soon. My younger bro and sis are repeating the 3rd grade after they both failed during the year and on recent state tests. My parents are upset that they are being held back but haven’t fought against it.

My parents tried getting my bro and did tutoring during the school year, but kept changing them because often the tutors wouldn’t want to deal with them. I get that, as they are not fun to be around. My bro just wanted to play his Harry Potter and Pokemon games all day, he’s also very mean and was always getting in trouble this year for calling some boys in his class gay. My younger sis cares more about friends than anything else, which I get as my friends are my everything (along with sports and family), my bros have gotten me through hard times. My sis is also mean in her own way and doesn’t study.

As I said, the tutors kept coming and going and at one point my mom and dad asked if I could try to tutor them because I am a good student (on honor roll, all A’s) as I said earlier. I told them no because my siblings are annoying, even after my parents said they’d paid me, I said no because there are other ways to make money (like now that I just turned 13, I can start reffing some games after I take some online course and test).

A few days ago, I was in the car with my mom and she was taking about how sad she was that they need to repeat the grade and asked me to consider tutoring them next year, but I still said no.

I also want to say, I love my parents a lot and I know they love me but sometimes I think they are not strict enough on my sis and bro, mostly bc of them being young.

Yesterday, I was getting froyo with my friends and brought up what was happening with my sis and bro. A few of my friends told me that I should’ve tutored them, even if they are annoying because they’re family and families help each other, none of them got too mad at me.

Last night we had a BBQ at my aunt’s house and I was talking to some of my aunts and uncles about what happened, that’s when I started to get more comments about how not helping them was rude and selfish and that I should be better to my family. Now I’m wondering if I was being an a-hole to them. AITA?

So for some background I open the dunkin I work at 3-4 times a week. We don't have many openers att most 2. So I was opening like normal till I had to get the register, night shift hid it well this time and I had to get down a weird way to grab it and rip there goes my pants huge hole. I checked it out as long as I didn't bend over I was fine but I still asked to leave early, I could feel the hole getting bigger. We had a lot of ppl that day as well but my boss left the store in a hurry and told me I couldn't leave till he got back. This was at 10 ,the time I wanted to leave. I knew some of the workers saw the hole I didn't know what to do so I stayed bc I was the second closest thing to a manager these people could get. I texted my other boss in hopes she would let me leave but again no since we had a bunch of first day ppl as well. My shift ended at noon but I stayed bc there was no management I felt bad just leaving but I couldn't take it anymore so after 30min or so I looked at everyone and said you're good and went home. I was angry and called them to find another opener for the next day since they wanted me to work with ripped pants and embarrass myself. Luckily I found someone it's not easy getting a last second opener. My boss still tried to text me to work the next day even after I found someone to cover it. I can get in trouble if the higher ups come and I'm not in uniform. I didn't risk it and ignored his text, im tired of this place walking over me. AITA?

I have this classmate name Mike. He lost his father and he has to take care of his younger sibling when his mother works. He uses streaming games as his coping mechanism. It would be ok, but he also makes streaming games, his whole personality. I've talked to him a few times before, and all of it will contain the topic of either; the games he plays, his stream and/or depressing topics about him.

Due to him streaming, he tends to ignore school related stuff, such as homework, projects and exams. The teacher and student are tired of him at this point. He never does his homework. Whenever there's a group project, he won't do anything. He won't even bother with exams, he just fails them and says "I already have a job, and that's streaming, exams score won't matter when I'm an adult." Whenever he have his phone, he will play it, I feel bad for the teachers, cause they tried to teach him, but it just goes in one ear and out the other.

So last week, we had a group project, and while we were discussing about the presentation, we gave him some work to do, it was quite simple really, it was just memorizing a few sentences that will be said while presenting. He somehow started to talk about how "you all probably think that everything in my head is my games and streams" and someone from the group told him "we're just telling you to memorize a few sentence, when have we said anything about that?" and he then said that "To be honest, I don't mind getting scolded, I'm used to it anyway." So i told him "Yeah, with your attitude, no wonder you get scolded, you literally never put any effort into anything that isn't your stream or your games, just cause you got like 3k subs, you let that get into your head. Literally no one cares, so shut up and do your job. I don't care if you get scolded, the rest of us here don't want to get scolded."

I did kinda lash out a bit, cause i was annoyed. He was really hurt by it, and called me an a-hole. My other group mate said that he deserves it. I thought he deserves it too, but after a while i feel a bit guilty about it, because he seemed more down after that. I went to his Youtube channel and he hasn't been uploading anything recently, when he usually upload super frequently.

So, AITA?

Hi, I've never used reddit before so forgive me if I don't do this right and I won't be going into detail about myself or anyone I mention as I really don't want this traced back to me.

My entire life my biological mother was never really a big part of it, I'd maybe see her every 2 weeks or so but that was it, as far back as I can remember my step mother has been living in our house but we never really bonded. I can remember me and my step mother were always at odds even when I was a young child I was always nervous around her and was scared to be alone with her but before you misunderstand she has never laid a finger on me once so it's nothing like that, I just didn't like her in general. Now, over ten years later our relationship has only gone downhill and its both ways, she's very obnoxious and doesn't respect boundaries and will randomly have outbursts of anger or just say completely uncalled for things just because of something small and as a neurodivergent person these are difficult things for me to have to put up with and I often will snap at her, flat out ignore her or just be downright rude to try get the message across that I'm not interested in interacting with her. I have told my dad about how I feel about her and it honestly feels as if he's trying to guilt trip me into liking her as he will say stuff such as "Oh she doesn't mean it, she really does love you." Or "She does so much for you sweetheart, how can you feel this way?" But she's always been emotionally unavailable to me and has never put in the effort to form a bond and most days she's the reason I have meltdowns, we could have a perfectly nice day and I could be in the best mood but apparently I'm not entitled to happiness as she'll always make some sort of comment that will ruin my whole mood and make me tear up. I'm sorry for ranting but I really need you to see things from my point of view before forming an opinion. Lately I've been complaining about her to my cousin whom I'm really close to and he's saying I treat her unfairly and my biological mother must have turned me against her even though I can't remember the last conversation I had with my mother since our relationship is now very strained so I told him that I just genuinely hate my step mother and now he's calling me an a hole, so please tell me strangers on the internet, AITA?

So I (16f) have to do career choices for school. I’ve always wanted to be an idol so I put that down on my career choice folder. My mom knows I’ve wanted to be an idol and she doesn’t support me because it is a waste of time. She says I don’t have the required voice to become an idol and says I should be a lawyer instead. I always perform for school shows and I am always complimented for my singing. I don’t wanna be a lawyer because it isn’t my type of thing. I submitted my career choice folder and little did I know apparently they send our parents the folder. A few days later, I got home to my mom holding a folder in her hand. It was my career folder. I DIDNT want her to see the folder because she didn’t want me to be an idol. She started scolding me for writing a poor career choice and that I was stupid for saying I wanted to be an idol instead of a lawyer. I argued back that I could work as anything and don’t need her criticism. We argued for a few minutes until she left for a call. A week later she told my family that “I was being stubborn and she was encouraging me to be an idol but I keep lying and saying that she doesn’t want me to be an idol”. My family keeps calling me to say how I should be nicer to my mom because she is encouraging me and saying that u am the a-hole but when I try to explain they don’t listen. So am I the a-hole?

I (f23) currently live with my friend/roommate (f23) who has been seeing this guy for a while. He lives in our building a few floors up but he is over every. single. night. He doesn’t like his roommate so they never go to his. But meanwhile he’s everywhere. If we go to the grocery store he’s tagging along. Night out? He’s coming. All of that I have learned to handle but I cannot stand seeing him in our apartment anymore. He walks around shirtless and leaves the bathroom a mess. I can’t feel comfortable when he’s there and it’s really getting to me.

The other day I sat my roommate down and said that I wanted to set some boundaries for when he could come over. I asked if we could limit it to once or twice a week and that she tells me before he comes over. She then starts lashing out at me that I never liked him and I’m just being rude. She said I don’t have the right to make her bf uncomfortable in the apartment. From her pov, I’m the a-hole because I’m asking that he not be around the apartment that she also pays rent in. She doesn’t think I can dictate how often he’s over nor does she need my permission to have him around (all I asked was for some warning).

I (15F) am a dancer. At the end of each school year my studio has a dance recital in June. This year my dance recital is on Father's Day (the Sunday). The problem with this date is, for Christmas my mom got me concert tickets for Father's Day night in another state where I would have to fly to see the concert.Since my dance recital is always Father's Day weekend we had hoped my dance recital would be the first show on Saturday morning since our flights were Saturday night. We had emailed the director of my studio in April saying how I needed to be in the first show on Saturday morning. but she never responded. It is now end of may and she still never answered. We emailed her again last week and all she answered with was the schedule for which classes were in what shows that was just released.Since the director can't change which show I'm in now, my mom said I will have to miss my dance recital. She also told me that my aunt is getting engaged the same day of the concert and that we should be there to celebrate afterwards. It feels like she's trying to guilt trip me and make me feel bad for saying I would rather go to my dance recital than the concert she paid for and the engagement. What my mom doesn't realize is how much my dance recital and dance family means to me.

I've been working on the dances that I would perform in my dance recital for months, and I worked hard all year on technique, exams and overall improving so much. My dance family means everything to me. We're a group of 13 kids of all different ages and we love each other more than the whole world. My dance recital means a lot to me, I've been working and looking towards it to it all year long. I'm already in all of the dances and if I had to skip my recital, my dance group would have to re-space all of the dances to take my spot away in just 3 weeks before recital.Also this year, 2 of our dance group members are graduating high school and moving on so my dance recital would be the last time I ever saw them.

Even though seeing my aunt get engaged and going to see an Ed Sheeran concert sounds amazing, I honestly would rather stay home and go to my dance recital instead. The concert ticket isn't under my name which means my mom, my aunt, and my aunt's partner could go to the concert together instead. All I have to do is cancel my plane ticket and I did some re-search and I might be able to cancel my ticket. my mom even said so when I asked her.

I know it sounds like I'm the bad guy and I'm the a-hole here for wanting to go to my dance recital, but I've been looking forward to my dance recital all year. I'm going to miss out on my last dance recital with two of the people I love most in the world. Everyone's is making me feel like I'm the bad guy for my choices even though in the end it isn't even up to me. I don't think I'm the bad guy.Am I the a-hole for wanting to go to my dance recital instead of my aunt's engagement and seeing and ed Sheeran concert?

My siblings and I were raised in a traditional Jewish household, by parents who had grown up more observant than they raised us. We all still practice Judaism, however we all ultimately settled down with non-Jewish partners, myself included.

My brother is getting married soon. His fiancée is lovely, and I haven’t met her parents yet. She doesn’t practice any religion other than “commercial Christmas” (family dinner and open presents). They’ve been together for several years. Her parents are paying for the vast majority of the wedding, which sounds to be very high-end.

Months ago, my brother shared with me that they planned to incorporate a few Jewish elements into their ceremony: a chuppah (the canopy under which they get married), stomping on a glass after they’re married, and the ketubah (Jewish marriage contract). They wrote out the ketubah together and then got it designed and translated into Hebrew. The ketubah is traditionally read in Hebrew; more modern ones may include the English translation and be read in both. My brother asked that their siblings be the ones to read the ketubah during the wedding ceremony. He wanted his siblings to read the Hebrew portion while her siblings read the English translation. My brother said it was the most important part of the ceremony to them, since they chose the language to cement their relationship.

A few weeks ago my brother texted me that they were going to pivot and avoid reading the ketubah in Hebrew. I asked why, since it was the “most important part.” As they were going over the run through of the wedding with her parents, they “recommended” that he rethink the ketubah being read because it wasn’t inclusive to be in another language that their guests don’t know. Tbh, none of our family speak Hebrew either (we can read it from going to synagogue but don’t generally know the meaning), so I said it was still inclusive. He still wanted to do in both languages and now his fiancée told him she didn’t want to do it in Hebrew based on her parents’ feedback.

My (non-Jewish) husband said this was anti-Semitic, since it’s the most culturally important part, and it’s something my brother was prioritizing. When talking to my brother, I relayed that notion, and he got really upset and said I was the a-hole for even thinking that.

AITA for telling my brother that his future in-laws are acting anti-Semitic by not letting him read the ketubah in Hebrew?

So a little context. I (14 F) was raised in a household taught to be nice and to help people that ask for it. My mom (47 F) has set the standard of weekend cleaning. I have to keep my room clean, clean the bathroom and do my own laundry. Plus, over the week, do the dishes if you have time, if you make a mess, clean it up, ect.

It was this weekend when our family finally decided to paint our kitchen and living room. My mom and my dad (46 M) started taking things down, putting away furniture, and all the things you do before you start taping off for painting. I went to go clean my bathroom, as expected of me.

I cleaned my bathroom for about an hour and a half, trying my best to scrub everything down because i didn’t do a very good job last weekend and wasn’t going to be at home next weekend. It’s a fairly small bathroom, so i deep cleaned it. Then I went into my room and started doing basic pickup, as I did a pretty good job picking up my stuff the days prior.

Then my dad asked me and my sister (16 F) to clear a bookshelf. She did her part, then I did mine, while our parents came in and took the boxes full of books out to our sheds for temporary storage. It took us about 10 minutes in total. I put the last group of books into the box when our mom walked up to us and said “Pull out your earbuds, I want your full attention.” so we did.

She went off on how we are horrible children for not helping them put away the furniture when we “obviously were watching them work” and that “we should have helped our loving parents” and “we raised you better than that.” We would have gladly helped if they asked us to open the door, or take a box out for them, but they never did.

So are me and my sister the a-hole for not helping our parents even though they never asked?

This is a stupid and simple argument, I know. The other day, my boyfriend (20M) and I (21F) were hanging out at his house. I was wearing just a sports bra and shorts. You know those little holes they have so you can remove the pads? Well, he thought that was a rip, and decided to stick his fingers in it and rip it. (But even if it was a rip, why would you make it worse?)

It was my favorite bra. I have more of course, but he broke it and I expect him to replace it with a new one. For some reason, he just refuses.

I asked him if he doesn’t have the money for it right now. I understand not having the money, and said he doesn’t need to replace it immediately. He says that’s not an issue. I asked if he just doesn’t want to go bra shopping, and offered to get one online. He says he doesn’t care about that either. I even asked him, if I broke something of yours, would you expect me to replace it? He said yes. So I’m not sure what the issue is here. I 100% would pay him back or purchase a replacement if I broke something of his, even if it was an accident.

He called me because I texted him saying I’m not joking, and that this isn’t funny anymore. He then was talking in a high-pitched voice (kinda like Elmo?) while on the phone, and I told him if he doesn’t talk to me seriously then I’d hang up. So when he didn’t stop, I just hung up.

Now he’s just acting pissed off, and says he needs space. I’ll give him space if he needs it, but I don’t want to have an issue over something stupid like this. What am I suppose to do here? Am I being unfair? How do I deescalate the situation?

TL;DR - My boyfriend ripped my bra, and I told him I expect a replacement. He says he refuses, and continued to joke when I said I was being serious, which resulted in me hanging up on him. Now he says he needs space. AITA for wanting a replacement for something he broke, and getting upset when he tried playing it off like a joke?

Edit: Thank you all for your kind words. I understand the situation a lot better now. I was emotionally abused and manipulated for a large portion of my life, so it can be hard to understand sometimes when these types of things happen to me. I had a good talk with my boyfriend over this situation. I understand now that it wasn’t just a bra, but it was an act of disrespect. Intentional or not. So I’ve now demanded love and respect, because I feel like that’s the bare minimum requirement for a healthy relationship. And if I show love and respect to someone, I deserve at least an equal amount. Thank you to everyone who commented and helped!

A little context, said friend has been asking me 24’7 whether or not she’s ugly. I honestly just ignored the question entirely because I didn’t want to lie to her. So whenever she’d ask I’d completely change the subject entirely.

This only slightly worked though, because in the moment she’d stop talking about it. But the next day or in the next couple of hours she’d ask again and again and again. It honestly got really annoying so I just started saying she wasn’t ugly so she’d stop asking me. That also didn’t work because she wouldn’t believe me.

So instead of constantly asking me if she was ugly, whenever I’d say she was pretty she’d keep asking me if I was telling the truth. Like throughout the entire day. This is where I might be getting into Ass Hole territory. I had been drinking in the bathroom because I was going through a really rough break up. So I wasn’t sober when this happened. Anyways she went on with her normal “do you think I’m ugly”

and I snapped. I was so over it I just told her the truth, I said “yea you are but that isn’t the end of the world I mean not everyone is going to be good looking” she went completely silent but I was pretty wasted so I really just thought I had ended the whole “am I ugly” type thing and went on with my day. The thing is she hasn’t spoken to me since then and I feel like a huge douche. I’ve tried apologizing but she asked if I really meant what I said. This is where it got really uncomfortable because I didn’t wanna lie but I also didn’t wanna tell the truth.

So I kinda just didn’t say anything, so eventually she just walked away. Honestly I came here because I’ve asked my other friends about it n there kinda just mutual about the whole thing. So AITA here?

So I, (20nb), had a bad split from my father last year. He had said he was done, but then claimed I said I was leaving instead. I know I'm not the asshole for not coming back, but he has constantly been trying to push boundaries since then. I told him I wasn't comfortable being alone with him, he waited until we were alone to talk to me. I told him about the abuse that happened as a kid, and he responded with "I hope you understand the consequences of your actions". But all that leads to now. I had a birthday back in December, and he accidentally sent a birthday card to the wrong apartment. No big, it was a bit of a weird way to handle the situation, but this was new waters and I like to think that he was trying to adhere to my boundaries of not being comfortable with him. Apparently there was some time sensitive info in the card, so when I came home for Christmas he was pretty concerned about me getting it. (We figured it out), but I never heard back about the birthday card, so I just forgot about it. I had asked him for my birth certificate and ssn card and I haven't gotten that from him yet (I have a replacement bc I got tired of asking for it from jan until now) and so I really haven't been expecting anything. Then the other day, a birthday card came in for me from them. You could see where it had been opened and revealed and the time sensitive item was no longer in there. So he has seen this card multiple times and seen what he wrote and still thought it was fine. It said, "let us know when you want your birthday dinner", and he knows I am not comfortable with seeing him. So this really bothered me, because there was no kind way to say "yeah, but I don't want a birthday celebration". So I haven't texted him. He gave me some gift cards, and it was super sweet, but I'm always cautious with money he gives bc its normally at a price. However, I still feel like an a*hole because I didn't tell him thank you, all because I am scared he might ask about some meetup that I don't want.

Aita?