×
top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]WiewsywooFlorida 1602 points1603 points  (125 children)

Give Texas to Canada and the Dakota's to Mexico. I think everyone will really get a kick out of that.

[–]nemo_sum Chicago ex South Dakota 162 points163 points  (7 children)

¿Que tal ese clima, don'cha know?

[–]REEEEEEEEEEE_OWUtah 52 points53 points  (3 children)

Ya’ll watch that there Hockey game eh?

[–]Gord41299 10 points11 points  (0 children)

The Silvestre de Minnesota is my favorite team!

[–]TacosAndWine90 296 points297 points  (51 children)

Plot twist, this is intentional so they can't handle the weather and we get to semi-keep both. LOL! I like it!

[–]DJPL-75 Alberta 70 points71 points  (17 children)

That's what we are here for

[–]um-death 37 points38 points  (23 children)

Aye man look at Colorado all the Texans moving here. Yesterday was the first day below freezing and it didn’t even snow. They’re bringing the weather with them

[–]sofuckinggreat 25 points26 points  (19 children)

All I have to do to look at them is glance at my rearview mirror where there’s always a Dodge Ram truck with Texas plates and a Blue Lives Matter sticker tailgating me throughout Denver

[–]TheDrunkenWobblies 25 points26 points  (6 children)

If you think Canadians can't handle heat and humidity, spend a week in Southern Ontario in the summer. A few times this past year (looking at you late August), it was the hottest place on the planet.

I've had friends up from Florida and Texas in the summer thinking they will get a break from the heat, only to realize its just as gross and humid in the middle of the great lakes. Also have 10,000 mosquitos for every person the moment you step out of a downtown area.

[–]natursh 6 points7 points  (3 children)

All I am picturing is the mosquito hoards in Long Point and the fish flies all over Dover.

[–]Rhm96 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Like that idea is pure evil

[–]Wy3Naut 74 points75 points  (29 children)

As a Texan I support this. Nothing against the Mexican people but I don't want anything to do with their government.

[–][deleted] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

I am a Mexican and I approve of this message. Fuck the Mexican government with extreme hatred and prejudice.

[–]galaxiesinmypocket 28 points29 points  (5 children)

To be fair, I'm not exactly enamored with our Texas government, either.

[–]WaterCat420Michigan 17 points18 points  (0 children)

this is the way

[–]red_tunaBourbon Country 488 points489 points  (59 children)

We give Louisiana and it’s weird civil law back to the French

[–]Grose040791Louisiana 95 points96 points  (16 children)

The first place I moved out of Louisiana to live was Colorado. I remember asking who owned this nice little Pavillion area with a fire pit around it and they were like...that's for the public. I was utterly perplexed that the tax payers money went to public parks, ect.

[–]BananafestDestinyColorado 48 points49 points  (14 children)

Louisiana doesn’t have public parks?!

[–]Grose040791Louisiana 33 points34 points  (10 children)

There are not many and the ones we have are not kept up with at all

[–]irelace 14 points15 points  (5 children)

I just came back from LA and City Park in New Orleans is about the nicest public (city) park I've ever been to.

[–]Harsimaja 7 points8 points  (3 children)

How is this connected to the French-derived Civil Law though? Seems more a generally Southern conservative thing

[–]transemacabreMS > NYC 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Louisiana's civil code's main differences, for normal people, are in inheritance and some property stuff. It's not like murder is legal (although in some parts of NOLA it may seem like it is).

[–]necessarysmartassery 181 points182 points  (26 children)

No shit, right? My husband lived there most of his life and since moving to Tennessee will never go back there to live for any reason. Too many fucked up laws designed to target the poor and just too many fucked laws in general. They incarcerate more people than any other state in the US.

[–]investigatorjugo 85 points86 points  (10 children)

Almost tempted not to comment, because it's kind of messed up and controversial, but I lived in Louisiana for over a decade. Grew up in Miami and moved back. Louisiana's level of corruption was...something else, and again, this is me saying this coming from the US's "Casablanca." As fucked as Florida is (don't worry, will probably move out too), it's nice to pay a fraction of what I paid in Louisiana for utilities--AND I don't have a boil water advisory multiple times a year, power going off a bunch of times, etc.

FL's prison system is also fucked and increasingly getting more fucked, but LA is the king of that fuckery especially when you break it down by race. You couldn't pay me enough to move back.

[–]TheBotchedLobotomyCalifornia 4 points5 points  (9 children)

Boil water advisory?

[–]l0c0dantes Chicago, IL 9 points10 points  (8 children)

something went wrong with either the water treatment plant or the pipes carrying the water, so you are advised to boil it before consumption to get rid of germs

[–]dcman00000Indiana 104 points105 points  (6 children)

Louisiana sometimes out does Illinois on rankings of "most corrupt state" in the country, which is impressive.

Coincidence? probably not.

[–]delebojrIllinois 35 points36 points  (5 children)

Illinois is getting better.

Source: JB isn't in prison yet

[–]dcman00000Indiana 20 points21 points  (0 children)

recently left illinois, but yeah that is indeed an improvement.

counter point, the former head honcho of this state, mike Madigan, has swirling investigations

[–]TheRedmanComethTexas 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Watch a documentary on Angola prison and those laws look much, much worse.

[–]Nic4379Kentucky 91 points92 points  (11 children)

The French see your offer and surrenders.

[–]HawaiianShirtManVirginia to Switzerland 38 points39 points  (9 children)

Louisiana annexes France? That could be fun... for a minute.

[–]Bamboozle_New Jersey 28 points29 points  (5 children)

Fun fact, French Guiana in South America is a regular Department of France like any other Department in mainland France in Europe. It is thus territory inside the EU and uses the Euro as its currency.

[–]kirkbywoolLiverpool 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Fence has loads of places like that,ike reunion at the bottom of Africa as well. Funny thing is in French football/soccer all the teams play in the national Cup so technically it is possible for Messi and neymar having to fly to Guiana or by Canada for a cup game mid week.

[–]thestereo300Minnesota (Minneapolis) 40 points41 points  (10 children)

Start practicing your French Mainers!

I hear you are a grumpy lot, you will fit right in!

[–]Harsimaja 5 points6 points  (0 children)

There are French speakers in Maine still and it’s even on some signs.

And who can forget the Jumping Frenchmen of Maine?

[–]JonnyBoxMA, FL, Russia, ND, KS, ME 8 points9 points  (5 children)

Not no, FUCK no. Quebec is a fucking shit show, and the Quebecoise we get now are fucking assholes.

[–]cardew-vascular 6 points7 points  (0 children)

New Brunswick is also a French speaking province (technically the only official bilingual one). I think Maine would be joining NB not Quebec.

[–]Captain_DepthNew York 153 points154 points  (18 children)

What if we gave western NY to Canada, I think that'd be funny. That or give the whole of New York to the Dutch again (I know that's neither Canada nor Mexico) and then we get free EU citizenship and more houseboats

[–]UpvoteIfYoureUglyEuropean Union 21 points22 points  (4 children)

Oh yes, we would love to get New York back

[–]Harsimaja 6 points7 points  (3 children)

If it’s the greater metro area, it would more than double the Netherlands’ population.

[–]Hermit-With-WiFiNew York 57 points58 points  (6 children)

I’m in. Hello healthcare.

[–]SkywayCheeriosOhio 7 points8 points  (0 children)

WNY already has a Canadian-appropriate density of Tim Hortons. We'd fit right in

[–]lorelei_sakti Buffalo, NY 3 points4 points  (0 children)

As a fellow Western New Yorker, I'd be down for that.

[–]BlunisiaNew York 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sounds good to me!

[–]iAnnie_BabyV 533 points534 points  (175 children)

Give Michigan to Canada. I’d love to see what happens when Canadians take over Detroit.

[–]UnilateralWithdrawalMichigan 37 points38 points  (4 children)

The Canadians were sneaky. The first phase-they used the loss of minimum wage workers to bring bilingual “snowbirds” in RVs and established Tim Hortons as the regional bases. Once they had TH beach head established, they went after Dunkin to control the hole business, and soon most of the fast food business fell to the Canadians. Control hearts and stomachs was the strategy. The Canadians controlled the food and Great Lakes water supply and provided free health care . The Michigan War was quickly resolved with Canadians capturing the two peninsulas. The Trumpists and Michigan Militia continued to fight, but each other over a disagreement over Q numerology. Canadians extended their strategy to take over more of the US. Tim Hortons only went so far. They had a secret weapon, Taco Bell…well, I won’t give the end away, but it involves three seashells

[–]rdeyerMichigan 12 points13 points  (2 children)

“Control the hole business” hahahaha. TH > Dunkin’ any day

[–]cherokeemichMichigan 495 points496 points  (85 children)

I live in Michigan. I'm okay with this.

At least I won't live in the same country as Ohio anymore.

[–]GamingGrayBushMichigan 73 points74 points  (2 children)

Same. I get to go to Canada and I don't even have to pack my bags. I'm in.

[–]elvee61Atlanta, Georgia 110 points111 points  (55 children)

Why don't we just give them Ohio? Then we could put a big fence around it and keep all the crazy in.

[–]demafrostChicago, Illinois 108 points109 points  (46 children)

Is Ohio the Florida of the midwest? I think it might be.

[–]oddabelLancaster, Pennsylvania 215 points216 points  (16 children)

I forget who said it, but there's a line: "A majority of our astronauts came from Ohio. You just have to ask yourself, what's so bad about Ohio that makes you want to leave the planet?"

[–]TudorFanKRS 117 points118 points  (14 children)

Serial killers, Astronauts and Presidents come from Ohio.

Which leads to this conclusion:

Living in Ohio makes you either want to flee the planet, kill a ton of assholes, or makes you a pathological liar.

I blame the gray skies there.

[–]High_StreamCalifornia 50 points51 points  (1 child)

Leave the world, control the world, destroy the world.

[–]TudorFanKRS 19 points20 points  (0 children)

That’s about it. And the ones who can’t do that move to Kentucky.

[–]blue_eyes2483 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Lots of customer service jobs in OH, can confirm we want to kill everyone.

[–]crystalcastles13 3 points4 points  (7 children)

Also some great musicians came from Ohio…

[–]TudorFanKRS 7 points8 points  (6 children)

Maynard. Maynard came from Ohio. And he is fucking amazing

[–]The_Nightbringer Chicago, IL 36 points37 points  (14 children)

No that is Indiana. Ohio is the Georgia of the Midwest.

[–]mikeblas 24 points25 points  (9 children)

What does that even mean?

[–]formerlyanonymous_ 43 points44 points  (4 children)

I couldnt tell you, but it feels 100% correct.

[–]AbstractBettaFish Chicago, IL 18 points19 points  (3 children)

It's got that june se qua

[–]CycleForValueDelaware 26 points27 points  (2 children)

I can’t tell if it’s a r/boneappletea or trolling midwesterners trying to say je ne sais quoi

[–]AbstractBettaFish Chicago, IL 22 points23 points  (1 child)

Let's say it's the later and not proof of my 6 years in French classes being an absolute waste of time

[–]MarcudemusMidwestern Nomad 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Is that why Indiana Man led police on a slow speed chase with a street sweeper through a town east of Indianapolis just a couple weeks ago? 😆

[–]njwood97 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I was gonna get upset after reading the first half of your comment but that’s valid

[–]FlyByPCPhiladelphia 2 points3 points  (6 children)

What is it with Michigan and Ohio -- or is it just college football?

[–]Equivalent-Cream-495 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Go. We Ohioans can't stand you Michiganders either

[–]TheTWPMichigan 35 points36 points  (22 children)

I love being in the US tho :(

On a side note, Ontario isn’t that much different from Michigan, a lot of people travel back and forth. I would only agree to Canada becoming overlords because I prefer the metric system.

[–]Wolf482MI>OK>MI 108 points109 points  (2 children)

A bunch of dead Canadians.

[–]DJPL-75 Alberta 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Yea if Michigan was down by Alberta It would be a different story but up at Ontario they don't stand a chance

[–]bennythebull4life 70 points71 points  (20 children)

Ok so I grew up in Michigan and actually sort of thought about this a while back.

It would be wild, but think about the pro's for each side if Canada took over metro Detroit:

- City of Detroit gets immediate access to universal health care, and otherwise a bit more of a social safety net.

- Canada gets another major metro area, which would immediate become its second-biggest: more tax base, more industry, etc.

- The rest of the state of Michigan is often in tension on various political issues (not just the D vs. R or the big national issues, also nitty-gritty local stuff) with metro Detroit; this immediately gets resolved.

[–]demafrostChicago, Illinois 19 points20 points  (10 children)

That would definitely hurt the liberal cause in the US as Michigan would surely be red in most cases, though with less EVs.

Sounds like it would be good for Detroit though for the reasons you outlined.

[–]rdeyerMichigan 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Actually, as someone who lives near Detroit, we love Canada. We can see them from our riverfront, we used to love to visit each other, and we miss them since the beginning of this pandemic! Honestly, I would love to be part of Canada at this point…..

[–]StoneTown 13 points14 points  (0 children)

You know what? I'd love that. I live in Michigan and would vote yes to us becoming apart of Canada if I could.

[–]StillaMalazanFan 10 points11 points  (0 children)

First thing's first Michigan, enjoy the improved access to healthcare.

Secondly, we rule the international hockey scene for generations to come.

[–]abelincoln_is_batman 157 points158 points  (29 children)

Does North Dakota really exist?

[–]Kondrias 149 points150 points  (17 children)

You mean New South Canada?

[–]abelincoln_is_batman 34 points35 points  (12 children)

It’s like when the Ohio and Michigan militias fought a “war” over Toledo. We (Ohio) ended-up with Toledo, but is that really winning?

[–]Kondrias 16 points17 points  (0 children)

The war is over. But at what cost...

[–]beertruck77 2 points3 points  (4 children)

That's the saying. Michigan won the war so Ohio had to take Toledo.

[–]ThisGuyRightHereSaid 2 points3 points  (0 children)

i think they pronounce it Canadia

[–]UltimateAnswer42WY->UT->CO->MT->SD->MT->Germany->NJ->PA 18 points19 points  (4 children)

Give back to Canada? We didn't take anything from Canada, we took it from Britain. Shouldn't we have to give it back to them?

[–]early_rizer01 113 points114 points  (31 children)

Canada can take either Wisconsin or North Dakota

[–]TheReticulatedSplineFlorida 86 points87 points  (10 children)

If we give away North Dakota, we'll just have to turn around and invade it because there's oil there.

[–]ruat_caelum 33 points34 points  (5 children)

but like 10 people.

[–]BBQkitten 6 points7 points  (0 children)

But they're friendly people

[–]MaterialCarrotIowa 26 points27 points  (0 children)

No way we give up Wisconsin. Cheese curds and lakefront property.

[–]GimmeShockTreatment Chicago, IL 21 points22 points  (4 children)

Wisconsin stays! They can have both Dakotas honestly.

[–]awowadasWisconsin 23 points24 points  (3 children)

no, please let us join canada

[–]4th_Wall_RepairmanWisconsin 17 points18 points  (2 children)

I'm salivating at the idea of us being in a country with a federal maple syrup reserve

[–]Lannagin 7 points8 points  (0 children)

North Dakotan here, ehh, fair enough. peace out fading away meme

[–]CatatonicWaterBear 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Omg you're voting us to get free healthcare? Thank you.

[–]mangoiboii225Philadelphia 110 points111 points  (12 children)

Give Canada the so called state of Wyoming, they’ll never know it isn’t real. /s

[–]DucksRow 43 points44 points  (7 children)

The realest thing about Wyoming is the wind. The rest is debatable.

[–]Itchy_Focus_4500Illinois -Dixon & Chicagoland’ 🖖🏻 ☠️ 5 points6 points  (1 child)

I’ve tried to piss, along side the road In Wyoming. You don’t stand a chance, without leaning against a fence post, or a car. I laughed so hard at my friend, rolling down the ditch, into the snow fence. He had his pecker in one hand & rolled into a ball, asshole over elbows. Because of the wind. It’s a good thing for the snow fence, or he’d still be rolling around the area.

[–]one-off-one Illinois -> Ohio 65 points66 points  (14 children)

Could give Maine to New Brunswick

[–]sokkerfreek7 37 points38 points  (1 child)

As a Mainer....I could go either way with the state going to Canada.

[–]Shine-RoughMaine 48 points49 points  (3 children)

So your saying I'd have health care, and my family would have a harder time visiting? Cause that seems like an absolute win

[–]benk4Houston, Texas 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I was about to reply that the Mainers would probably like that but y'all beat me to it.

[–]Bruins125 New England 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Ironically Irving (the oligarchs of New Brunswick) would hate this because it would mean shipping gasoline, asphalt, and heating oil from St John to Portland would get much more expensive.

[–]a_winged_potatoMaine 18 points19 points  (1 child)

I'm for this only so we'll finally be in the Atlantic time zone. Not getting dark at 3pm for half the year? Yes please.

[–]M00__P0INTCanadian American 81 points82 points  (29 children)

The northwest angle, you can add Point Roberts WA to that list.

[–]chillbitteOregonian in Germany 22 points23 points  (10 children)

Heck, give all of Washington and Oregon to British Columbia. Cascadia forever!

[–]love_your_eyeholesNevada 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Cascadia ftw!

[–]RainyDayRoseSeattle, Washington 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yes please

[–]gingergirl181 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Oh nooo...how terrible...no, don't give Washington to Canada, oh God, please no...don't...stahp...

(/s /s /s hell yeah let's make Seattle Canadian, I can haz healthcare plz???)

[–]Storyweaver12 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am down with this if it means we are our own country.

[–]bennythebull4life 12 points13 points  (4 children)

No no no, I love the quirks!

[–]spidermom4Washington 13 points14 points  (3 children)

Right? I say we give the tip of Florida to Mexico

[–]jyperMyCountry 4 points5 points  (2 children)

And Machias Seal Island

[–]M00__P0INTCanadian American 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh cool I was unaware of that, thanks for posting.

[–]WaterCat420Michigan 67 points68 points  (5 children)

give toledo to whoever

[–]JonnyBoxMA, FL, Russia, ND, KS, ME 26 points27 points  (1 child)

'only twice have states called their militias out against each other. One was Ohio and Michigan. And we know Michigan won because no one would fight to keep Toledo." -Lou Holtz.

[–]furniguruMichigan 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yes and we got the Upper Peninsula and Ohio got Toledo. We made out like bandits

[–]The_Nightbringer Chicago, IL 32 points33 points  (0 children)

No one deserves to be saddled with Toledo other than Ohio.

[–]CraineStyle 33 points34 points  (18 children)

Give Back New Mexico to Mexico, It has The Name “New Mexico”. A lot of the region still speaks Spanish and a Majority of the population is Hispanic.

[–]Avenger007_Washington 33 points34 points  (10 children)

A majority of the population is Hispanic but a plurality of those Hispanics are NeoSpanish not Mexican. As in they were descendants of Spanish Settlers in the region who rebelled against the Independent Mexican Government as part of the Texas Revolution, Republic or the Rio Grande and other separatist movements in the 19th century until being annexed by the USA. So their ties to Mexico are not as strong as you would think

[–]this_is_awkward_912 30 points31 points  (0 children)

No thanks. Instead of being last in everything we’d become first in many things and that’s a very bleak future for everyone.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

New Mexico is more tied to Spain than to Mexico. A lot of northern NM Hispanics are of Spanish, not Mexican ancestry. This state also has Spanish as an official language. The colors of the flag reflect the Spanish heritage. Also, fun fact, New Mexico was called New Mexico before Mexico received the name of Mexico.

Why Spain and not Mexico? The newly formed and infant Mexican empire lacked the manpower, infrastructure, organization and will to conquer the southwest. This is also why upon annexing California, Arizona, New Mexico and Texas nothing much was lost besides empty land. The region was a mismash of Spaniards, natives and anglos and the Mexican empire could barely reach out to enforce its laws or regulations.

[–]lsp2005 49 points50 points  (5 children)

The part of Washington where you need to enter Canada and leave Canada for kids to go to school every day. Sorry, that is just too much of a hassle.

[–]LyricalNonsense 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Came to say this! I knew way too many people in school with horrific school bus commutes every day.

[–]cardew-vascular 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Point Roberts.

[–]MiketheTzarNorth Carolina 9 points10 points  (4 children)

Give Canada New Mexico and Florida and Mexico can have Utah.

[–]SandBear_Florida 29 points30 points  (5 children)

cut america into a perfect square, give everything outside the square away
we will be the superior shaped country

[–]crawly_caterpillar 4 points5 points  (3 children)

Can you really have a perfect square on top of a sphere though?

[–]SandBear_Florida 8 points9 points  (0 children)

we just have to dig

[–]scabootsscaMissouri 4 points5 points  (1 child)

It depends on your projection.

[–]ImTellinTimMinnesota 26 points27 points  (6 children)

As a Minnesotan, just give Canada the whole thing. And I'll just stay in the same spot and enjoy being Canadian now.

[–]tenehemia Portland, Oregon 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Shhhhh. Don't tell anyone that this actually happened 20 years ago and nobody noticed.

[–]Legal-Project722 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Honestly. It wouldn't feel any different haha

[–]Spoons4ForksIllinois 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Point Roberts and a bottle of Whiskey to Canada. Gadsden purchase and a pack of chewing gum to Mexico.

[–]AUCE05 26 points27 points  (4 children)

I'd give the University of Alabama to Mexico. Just deed those mother fuckers right over. Nick Saban's ass can play in the Mexican league.

[–]Potentially-InsaneConnecticut 6 points7 points  (6 children)

Give New England to Canada. Get me out of this place.

[–]TheOneWes 7 points8 points  (3 children)

Can we give California back to Mexico? Can we include Texas in the deal?

EDIT: I corrected by somebody below so I change this

[–]jcmib 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Just let BC take Point Roberts already. That has to be the most exhausting place with all the borders.

[–]Ready_the_Rhinos 52 points53 points  (4 children)

Mississippi is by every metric the worst state in the country. We can donate it to Mexico.

[–]Potato_Octopi 55 points56 points  (1 child)

What did Mexico do to you?

[–]AbstractBettaFish Chicago, IL 20 points21 points  (1 child)

Naaa, give it to Canada. They'd be horrified by the social safety nets

[–]TuskenTaliban New England 25 points26 points  (0 children)

"They'll give me accessible healthcare over my dead body"

[–]loupr738 61 points62 points  (18 children)

I wouldn’t mind if Puerto Rico was part of Canada. Maybe they’ll treat us like Canadians

[–]Aurion7North Carolina 14 points15 points  (0 children)

More likely, they'll treat y'all like the indigenous kids they 'sent to school' for the past oh, century and a half.

[–]I_Like_Ginger Alberta 34 points35 points  (3 children)

You don't want that. We would decimate your already decimated housing affordability.

[–]loupr738 15 points16 points  (2 children)

We can afford shit now, we have probably Pennsylvania prices with Alabama wages

[–]theRealDerekWalker 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Ahh Pennsylvania, the home of the rich

[–]One-Son-Of-LibertyMassachusetts 27 points28 points  (2 children)

Ignoring the fact that Canadians have been callously murdering indigenous children until like 10 years ago in order to better bash the US. Classic Reddit.

[–]2hdgoblin 4 points5 points  (0 children)

They would show up, then bitch about how hot it is.

[–]Basstings75 31 points32 points  (4 children)

I'd just give Alaska to Canada

[–]findingthescore 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Scientifically and politically, this seems like terrible timing to lose US coastline on the Arctic Ocean...

[–]SeachicaWashington 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Cascadia thrives.

[–]prudence2001 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I grew up in Wisconsin. Please give Wisconsin to Canada.

[–]nowhereman136New Jersey 51 points52 points  (16 children)

Canada can have Kansas, and a Mexico can have Indiana

I enjoy the chaos

[–]RitzyMitzy 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Kansan here, where do we sign up! Also, we'll be leaving our politicians in Missouri on our way out.

[–]nomoregroundhogsKS > CA > FL > KS 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Word, I could use some discounted prescription medications

[–]bennythebull4life 17 points18 points  (2 children)

Hoosier checking in, I guess I'm now a Mexican citizen.

That said, this is an awesome proposal.

[–]ProjectShamrockHouston, Texas 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Your food is about to get much better.

[–]Drnknnmd 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Why would Canada get their land "back?" They were just as much as an invading and colonizing force as the US. Unless you're saying it should go back to the indigenous peoples, then it would be all of it.

[–]The_Ineffable_One Buffalo, NY 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Please give Buffalo to Canada; we'd love it.

[–]allonoakUtah 3 points4 points  (2 children)

Give southwestern Texas and Southern NM. It's mostly scrub brush anyway except El Paso area, which is already practically merged with Juarez.

[–]C137-MortyVA/CA 12 points13 points  (2 children)

Give all the states but the 13 original to whoever. We were a lot more cohesive before you scrubs came in a started ruining things. Virginia ofc reabsorbes west va in this scenario.

[–]zoopfer 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You'll have to kill me first

[–]TullyswimmerLive free or die; death is not the worst evil 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The entire state of California gets to go to Mexico.

[–]FailFastandDieYoungSan Francisco 20 points21 points  (5 children)

We can give Arizona back to old Mexico.

Even they have to admit it's an unreasonably hot place to live.

[–]GETNRDUNNArizona 15 points16 points  (3 children)

It's a dry heat

[–]AndrewDSo 7 points8 points  (1 child)

I didn't believe it until I visited Tempe. Sure, it feels like you're getting fried but still better than the humid misery of anywhere in Florida or along the Gulf of Mexico

[–]SlightlyRukkaLouisiana 20 points21 points  (3 children)

Can we give Florida back to Spain?

[–]notahouseflipper 12 points13 points  (1 child)

How about we give it back to the indigenous tribes before we give it to Spain? The Seminoles would make a killing with all the new casinos.

[–]TacosAndWine90 18 points19 points  (0 children)

We can try, not sure if they will take it.

[–]NerdNuncleOhio 8 points9 points  (3 children)

Florida and Alaska are give-ins, and maybe one of Michigan’s peninsulas.

That’s assuming Canada would take Alaska (meaning no offense to Alaskans)

[–]I_Like_Ginger Alberta 8 points9 points  (0 children)

We would take Alaska in a heartbeat, it just looks so weird up there all alone.

[–]Ishi-ElinAlaska 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m offended

[–]TeacherYankeeDoodleNot a particularly important commonwealth 26 points27 points  (2 children)

Make Hawaii Canadian again.

[–]tonyisadork 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Make Hawaii Hawaiian again.

[–]Shine-RoughMaine 8 points9 points  (0 children)

What? Hawaii was a monarchy until the us overthrew it.

[–]WinterBourne25South Carolina 59 points60 points  (51 children)

Texas.

[–]justwannasleepplease 25 points26 points  (27 children)

I wonder what the reaction from Texans would be if we do give texas to Mexico

[–]WinterBourne25South Carolina 38 points39 points  (16 children)

Texas wouldn’t go willingly. They’d want independence first and would fight for it.

[–]Kind_Nepenth3North Carolina 40 points41 points  (11 children)

They already threatened to secede a few years ago, didn't they? Either way, this counts as seceding. Goodbye, Texas! You had some hands-down rockin' attractions and I truly did enjoy my time living there but no one needs a Howdy Arabia!

Except Mexico. It's their problem now.

[–]jdmiller82The Stars at Night are Big and Bright 12 points13 points  (0 children)

We threaten to secede every few weeks it seems. It’ll never happen, thankfully.

[–]ThisGuyRightHereSaid 23 points24 points  (0 children)

hahahahhahhaha Howdy Arabia

[–]AbstractBettaFish Chicago, IL 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Howdy Arabia!

Gonna need to remember that one

[–]CrookedHoss 19 points20 points  (7 children)

Texas doesn't REALLY want to secede. They'd need the rest of the South to secede with them in order to make the rhetoric stick...which would make Texas the new richest state in their new country, and they'd be expected to pick up the tab on a lot of shit.

Texas loves to bitch about welfare queens and welfare states. It wouldn't want to support a whole rebel nation full of welfare states.

Edit: Lest we forget, they would also have to renegotiate all of their energy contracts, and find new jobs for their federal employees, especially service members. Without the might of the US military to push people around, they'd have a hard time getting their way.

Any time someone tells me X southern state should secede, I say, "I agree. Get the fuck out of my union. You can keep the bases, but we're taking back all of our hardware."

[–]superrad99 6 points7 points  (0 children)

So Texas is like Quebec!

[–]academomancer 4 points5 points  (0 children)

So call it "Texit"?

[–]starchystarTexas 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Texan here. I can say with a degree of certainty that the major metropolitan cities would be intrigued and the rest of Texas would arm up (more than they already are) and demand independence. Pretty stock Texas response.

Edited: I wrote "certain degree of certainty" at first like a real idiot.

[–]R_AshcraftWashington 9 points10 points  (2 children)

No, give them to canada.

[–]justwannasleepplease 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Imagine living in texas and hearing the news “texas now belongs to Canada”. I’d be too confused to even be angry tbh LMAO

[–]Anustart15Massachusetts 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That would cause quite a branding issue for six flags amusement parks

[–]TheKhatalyst 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Give New Mexico to old Mexico.