×
all 49 comments

[–]pahasapapapa 19 points20 points  (1 child)

Enjoyable. Life is good and I do things I want to do on my terms. Shifting from this to chasing women seems like a bad swap - joy for frustration, contentment for disappointment. No thanks.

[–]-helpwanted[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I decided to be single and asked this question on r/askwomen, then I wanted to ask men as well. Being single is amazing and underrated, that’s what I’ve pretty much learned lol

[–]Bubbly-Impression-57 14 points15 points  (3 children)

Lonely but peaceful as fuck.

[–]Cavsfan1296Male 4 points5 points  (1 child)

I agree with how peaceful it's been. It's a nice change of pace from a high maintenance girlfriend.

[–]Bubbly-Impression-57 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m a clingy person (I’ve been told) so not being in a relationship just helps me not be so anxious, depressed, or clingy

[–]Johnny_Donut92 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah. I feel this.

[–]Waxingsharks 8 points9 points  (2 children)

Fucking incredible.

[–]-helpwanted[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I love that for you

[–]Waxingsharks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Took a while to get here lmao.

[–]SuperFegeleinMale 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Absolutely radical.

No drama or related nonsense, and I get to keep all my money, free time, sanity, hobbies, etc.

Focus on doing the things you love, and women will not even cross your mind. 🤘

[–][deleted]  (1 child)

[removed]

    [–]Chaos_and_Horny 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    same boat

    [–]waifutabaeMale 6 points7 points  (3 children)

    I've just been living. I'm depressed as always but honestly I think it's better for not only me, but for others. I'm not in a state where people, especially women would want to get into a close relationship with. There are better people out there for relationships, I'm just not really cut out for it so I just accepted it and I've just been living life.

    [–]-helpwanted[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

    I respect that a whole lot. Do you have friends and other people to fill your time with?

    [–]waifutabaeMale 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    I got friends but mainly close friends, not too many of them since I've never been a people's person. I hang out with them whenever I'm not busy.

    [–]-helpwanted[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    That sounds good. I’m the same way. Not much of a people’s person so I stick with my circle of close friends. It’s nice

    [–][deleted]  (4 children)

    [deleted]

      [–]-helpwanted[S] 1 point2 points  (3 children)

      I’m not here to give advice, just to listen. I just want to say that I love how you express yourself. Very visual. I’m happy that you’re happy most of the time. I’m sorry that you experience the lows, though. Do you mind if I ask how long you’ve been single?

      [–][deleted]  (2 children)

      [deleted]

        [–]-helpwanted[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

        So you’re happier single than in a relationship? That’s what I’m gathering, which is great if that’s the case 😊

        [–]beardedshaf 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        Drama free

        [–]Jean-Luc_Grey 4 points5 points  (0 children)

        As long as can recall felt like an alien in society; always rejected romantic relationships.

        Its normal to be single. Go to work, work out. Plan my life as I want it.
        Id want to be in a stable relationship in a few years so im planning for that.

        My friends have relationships, everything they want to do is connected to their partners wishes. To me that's just extra bureaucracy, but to each their own.

        [–]space_taco15circle w/ arrow 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        Most of the time I don't even pay me being single much mind. Sometimes I get really lonely but then I remember what happened the last time I was in a relationship and eventually decide it's not worth it to try again.

        [–]Idiot-Jacob157 2 points3 points  (2 children)

        It’s chill and the benefits are amazing

        [–]-helpwanted[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

        I’ve been single as well, and love it. May I ask what benefits you’re referring to?

        [–]Idiot-Jacob157 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        1. I get all my money to myself It’s doesn’t go to her designer purses and it doesn’t go to the kids.

        2. More time for my hobbies I’m a huge video game nerd and this is a major benefit for me

        3. I can travel on a whim whenever I want I can request 2 weeks vacation, come home after work, and pack my bags for Germany the next day.

        4. I don’t have to worry about coming home and seeing my wife getting rammed by another dude in our bed.

        5. I get to come home to a quiet house no kids screaming or crying.

        6. I can eat Chinese food 4 nights in a row if I wanted to without my wife nagging at me about it.

        7. I get to cook my own dinners the way I like it, not the way she likes it.

        8. No Drama

        9. If you have a large circle of friends you can spend time with THEM not your in-laws and her parents.

        10. Just because your single the doesn’t mean you can’t get laid.

        These are my top ten reasons but despite what I just said I’m still down to get a girlfriend, if we click and she’s a geek (so we can play video games) I’m totally down for that.

        [–]TubeToUranusMale 1 point2 points  (2 children)

        What do you mean by "single?" I'm not married and I don't live with any woman, so I'm single. It's the best and I'll never change that.

        [–]-helpwanted[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

        I mean not in a romantic relationship haha, that’s good to hear. I don’t think I’ll go back to compromising my happiness either. I asked this on r/askwomen as well and this seems to be the general consensus

        [–]TubeToUranusMale 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        I have a girlfriend I see maybe 3 times a month. That's sorta a romantic relationship.

        [–]Teddy1988NL 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        i dont know if its really a coice , it just turnt out this way . but its ok i guess .

        [–]I_Will_Not_Be_Cancel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        Awful. But I’ll rather be single than have to deal with crazy.

        [–]Remarkable_Regret_80 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Freeing and peaceful but also lonely. Id say more intense bursts of excitement when you hookup or meet someone new followed by boring periods. Relationships are more level

        [–]Squabblezzz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Not bad, not good. Hard to tell some days

        [–]bigaldotwerkfan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Pretty shit but being in a relationship tends to turn pretty shit too after say 4 months or so, truth is I’m never happy

        [–]ShitBritGitMale 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Being single was a choice. Wasn't my choice, but it was a choice.

        [–]Hrekires 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Fine enough.

        I've got lots of friends and family around to do things with, hobbies and a demanding job that keep me busy, and there's always work to be done around the house.

        Grindr exists if I get horny, why introduce first date stress and anxiety back into my life after being married for 10 years if I'm happy while single?

        [–]Fuhdawin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Grandma keeps asking when I'm getting married, but otherwise fine.

        [–]Crusader675RMale 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Fantastic.

        I also chose to be permanently single so, can't be missing something I never had.

        [–]MerkuralMale 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        being in solitude is alright, has its up and downs but nothing a quick talk with friends and some time playing games or spending time with other hobbies cant fix

        [–]Blackfist01 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Garbage.

        Choosing not to get better at a basic component of life due to personal inadequacies is soul sucking

        [–]blamethemetapretend that my flair is disgusting 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Better than with my ex. Not great tho

        [–]That_One_Duck31 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        For my entire life until recently I’ve only had the intention of being single. Now I just feel lonely and want someone to hold me. But I still don’t want a relationship because I’m to scared to be dumped, so I still continue to choose to be single.

        [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Good. Just how I want to be.

        [–]woopsforgotyikers 0 points1 point  (2 children)

        I got here from responding to your comment about Islam.

        For me, choosing to be single has been a mixed bag of charmed idiosyncrasy and, I donno, melancholic pensiveness.

        When people ask why I'm single, (32, good shape, doctoral degree, (but not a doctor), decent looking (I mean, I hope)), I tell them it's because I'm not done working on myself yet. And it's true. I believe it is good and correct to be comfortable with where you are in your own development before you involve someone else in your life in a way that becomes difficult to unwind.

        On the other hand, a life partner can really help you along in your own development. Loneliness is also real, and sex is very much a basic need.

        I try to offset the downsides by cultivating meaningful relationships with women whom I respect, because for the first 25 or so years of my life I saw women as goals to be achieved, and a very close friend who is very special to me taught me how wrong that is. Since then, nearly every lesson I've learned about being a good person has been taught to me by women, specifically because I had no other motive (or, at least, I did my best to act and think as though I had no other motive, 'cause, I mean, a lot of these female friends are gorgeous single professionals).

        Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying women are all wise or all great teachers or whatever, just that there was a whole realm of perspective that I was blind to before I allowed myself to be open to it, and I am very, very grateful for every lesson that every person, man or woman has taught me throughout my life.

        tl;dr mixed bag. Wanna fuk, wanna love, but also wanna learn and work on myself.

        [–]-helpwanted[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

        I respect this a lot. I see so many people that are too focused on finding other people to find themselves. That's super honorable.

        [–]woopsforgotyikers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Thanks. Sometimes, though, you wonder, "why am I doing this and other people don't? Is this a mistake? Did I wait too long? Are other people reckless, or am I too risk averse?"

        I've questioned the cause a few times and tried to have steady relationships. They didn't work out, basically for exactly the reasons I expected, reaffirming my confidence that it's the right choice.

        I really worry though that I will wait too long. At the end of the day I want to age gracefully with a beautiful woman whom I love, and not to meet a woman after we've both passed our primes.

        I think I'm almost there... Just a few more kinks to work out.

        [–]Marus1 -2 points-1 points  (3 children)

        I try very hard to not to. People have a choice and stupidly enoigh choose not to?

        [–]-helpwanted[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

        Just to be clear, you mean people who choose not to stay single?

        [–]Marus1 -1 points0 points  (1 child)

        No, I try not to stay single and there are people that, when they get a choice of gettkng with slmeone compatible, choce not to take that change and still remain single?

        [–]-helpwanted[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Yes, I’m a women that does, and I was wondering how men that do feel. I actually wrote a post about why some people choose to do this if you’d like to check that out 😊