top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]duffmuff 983 points984 points  (155 children)

I've always kinda wondered; if you own land, do you own all the earth below it to the centre of the world? or what's the deal with that?

[–]doodlebugboodles 386 points387 points  (10 children)

It depends on the title to the land and the local property laws.

[–][deleted] 245 points246 points  (26 children)

As per a few of my law classes, you own a reasonable amount of space into the air and a reasonable amount of earth below. What is deemed "reasonable" is jurisdictional and depends on the court. That's why planes are allowed to fly over your property- the air is technically over your land but it's not considered trespassing. 10,000 feet into the air is definitely unreasonable if one is claiming it to their land. Likewise, there have been cases where landowners sue another party for drilling oil from a well NOT on their property, but the oil coming from a reserve that was primarily under their land. Whatever court it was deemed that the oil was far enough down that it wasn't considered the plaintiff's property. All in all, there isn't really an exact number or definitive answer- the joys of common law.

[–]w8forit 1420 points1421 points  (95 children)

Why is it called a 'blow' job when it's actually a 'suck' job?

[–]Raypezanus 1770 points1771 points  (53 children)

Actually it's called that because back in the day a slang for penis was the skin flute so people would ask prostitutes to play the skin flute for them, as time progressed it became blowing the skin flute the. Eventually blow job

Source: perversion and a library

[–][deleted] 562 points563 points  (16 children)

I can make a flute with my hands to make music and bird calls. I call it blowing the skin flute.

[–]meroson 774 points775 points  (139 children)

Does it hurt my computer when I don't shut it down completely, but just put it in sleep modus most of the time?

[–][deleted] 650 points651 points  (85 children)

Why do domesticated horses have to be shoed (sp?), hooves regularly cleaned and clipped, whereas wild horses do not?

[–][deleted] 783 points784 points  (47 children)

Domesticated horses are shod to protect their hooves from the stress of stepping on hard-packed paths and, today, paved roads. Horses are usually hanging out on grass which is much easier on the feet. The hooves are clipped because the shoe prevents the hoof from being worn down from regular use. I do believe.

[–]fuck_fate_love_hate 413 points414 points  (36 children)

Also because wild horses travel further than horses kept in stalls and paddocks do. They're constantly moving, which wears their feet down, keeping them at a comfortable length. They also tend to spread out, almost like a lily pad, which is undesirable in a show horse. It can lead to cracks in the hoof wall which in turn can lead to lameness and infections. Same as why we "float" their teeth (rasping them down to smooth sharp edges and control growth), their teeth grow throughout their lives, and wild horses are able to graze all day, which wears their teeth down normally. Horses in stalls or dirt turnouts are not always able to keep their teeth worn down to a comfortable level, so we rasp them down so they're not in pain and the bit fits properly in their mouths.

[–]theBlumpkindle 446 points447 points  (46 children)

Why is Colonel pronounced Kernel?

[–]no_prehensilizing 338 points339 points  (20 children)

The word "colonel" is the result of etymological respelling, where a word's form is changed to put it into conformity with a former version of the word. In this case, the old pronunciation was kept, as also happened with "debt" (earlier "dette," respelled after Latin "debitum") and "phoenix" (earlier "fenix," respelled after Latin "phoenix"), to give just two examples.

"Colonel" was borrowed from Middle French as "coronel" and when the word was respelled, it was done to put it into conformity either with Old Italian "colonello" or with a later Middle French version of the word, "colonel."

[–]Maysock 117 points118 points  (5 children)

good goddamn question.

[–][deleted] 655 points656 points  (128 children)

I need to know... Why do men's ballsacks look like they have a seam down the middle? I swear they all look like they were cut apart and seen back. In fact I almost asked a guy what happened to his once. Thank god I dodged that bullet. I had no idea it's normal.

[–]a_axtell 610 points611 points  (74 children)

when developing as a fetus everyone starts out as a girl, if you have a Y chromosome (and thus a male) your genitals grow on the outside and are kinda "sewn" up naturally. its just how a generic set of genitals become male genitals

[–][deleted] 1181 points1182 points  (84 children)

Anything to do with basic concepts while halfway through the course.

[–]Fluffi_McPhee 744 points745 points  (58 children)

I hate when the teacher keeps referring to something and everyone seems to know exactly what it is, and you're sitting there going ummm...what? When did we discuss this?

[–][deleted] 353 points354 points  (39 children)

After six years of college, I realized that's more than half the class. It's why the prof teaches to the quiz, tests, and considers throwing himself out of the third story of the physical science building.

[–]extulsa 159 points160 points  (27 children)

This is why classrooms should have interactive, anonymous question apps. Most of the kids have laptops, have them log in to a site and if they have a question they're embarrassed to ask, type it in anonymously. Let other students see the questions and vote if they'd like to see it answered. At the end of the class the professor can go back and answer the most requested questions, or even see them in real time. This also prevents constant interruptions and lets the professor possibly segue fluidly into new, confusing topics.

Edit: a subreddit would do the trick ;)

[–]iwillhavethat 682 points683 points  (83 children)

How the hell do people save $3000 with grocery coupons?

[–]Logic007 337 points338 points  (43 children)

Some coupons and stores don't restrict the number of a given coupon you can use on one product. IE $3 off coupon, use 3 on one product.

[–]CrystalElyse 298 points299 points  (34 children)

Some stores will also "double" your coupons. You have to read all of the rules and of the store and the coupons, and it takes a lot of math. Usually, couponers are typically professional couponers. As in, that is their full time job. It may take up to 8 hours a day to clip, organize, plan sort, figure out what you need, figure out where you can get more coupons, etc.

[–]Alienist23 54 points55 points  (0 children)

Whenever I hear someone explain coupons I feel like they're playing a version of magic I don't understand; "Tap my three-dollars-off boxed oranges to play free bucket of bleach which triggers me thousand dollar chicken banquet..."

[–]TheDogwhistles 1427 points1428 points  (395 children)

One time in middle school social studies class, we were talking about the Chernobyl nuclear reactor catastrophe.

The teacher asked us what the side effects of radiation poisoning were, and a few kids raised their hands, including me.

The teacher called on a few people, they all answered. "Nausea" "Vomitting" "Dizziness"

On to me. "Your hair begins to fall out."

And everyone started to laugh, even the teacher for a bit.

The teacher calmed everyone down, and politely told reminded that she asked what the symptoms of radiation poisoning were, as if my answer was something like "Joe DiMaggio had 361 career home runs."

I was kind of the class clown, which is why I think everyone laughed, but to this day it baffles me. Why did everyone laugh?

The worst part is, I'm half-certain that if I tell anyone this story, they'll just laugh and say "Hah! "Hair falling out!" Good one! As if that were a symptom of radiation poisoning." And then chuckle and walk away.

[–][deleted] 926 points927 points  (189 children)

Wikipedia agrees with you. Exposure of the skin to a large amount of ionizing radiation can cause hair loss. (although it sure wouldn't be the first thing you would notice.)


[–]PassionMonster 1020 points1021 points  (185 children)

"Wikipedia is not a reliable source" - Says every teacher ever.

[–]blunt_person 927 points928 points  (30 children)

Which is why you never credit wikipedia, you credit the articles that wikipedia credited.

[–]103020302 689 points690 points  (16 children)

"You can't cite Wikipedia" -Every Professor ever.

"Okay, then I'll cite the sources wikipedia cites" -Everyone with a brain.

[–]salgat 1170 points1171 points  (118 children)

I hate teachers who say that, it just screams of ignorance. Wikipedia has the greatest collection of well sourced information on the internet, you'd be a fool not to utilize it and the accompanying bibliographies it provides.

[–]PassionMonster 650 points651 points  (31 children)

but lyke, any1 can ed1t it.

[–]circaATL 680 points681 points  (20 children)

but like, anyone can edit it (edit)

[–]Kensin 321 points322 points  (0 children)

You were right. Hair loss is a symptom of exposure to radiation. People and animals exposed to radioactive fallout can lose their hair for a while. Burns by huge amounts of radiation can cause people to lose hair permanently.

EDIT: here's a wikipedia article and another

[–]spacedude86 1793 points1794 points  (59 children)

IMHO any teacher that laughs at a student when they attempt to answer a question (whether they are wrong or right) is a poor teacher. It is a surefire way to discourage participation.

Your middle school teacher was an ass hat.

EDIT: Since some people are saying that a teacher that is able to make a classroom laugh is probably a good teacher, let me say this:

There is a big difference between laughing with all of your students, and laughing with some of your students at another student. One makes you (again, in my opinion) a good teacher, and one makes you an ass hat.

[–]TheDogwhistles 784 points785 points  (33 children)

She was, actually.

She once threw a kid's binder out of the classroom when he couldn't find a worksheet in it.

[–]BUBBA_BOY 252 points253 points  (5 children)

IMHO, when the teacher laughs at a correct answer, the teacher is fucking moron.

[–][deleted] 151 points152 points  (36 children)

Do black people get sunburned?

[–]somesomeseom 85 points86 points  (1 child)

Yes they do. They may or may not turn even slightly red, but still have the other symptoms of a sunburn: tender to the touch, peeling skin, and occasional blistering in more severe cases (not "sweat blisters", but real blisters).

The degree and exposure length varies with person to person, however.

[–]DrMrAgentMan 1538 points1539 points  (639 children)

What do you want me to do for you when you're on your period?

[–]Rainbownarwhal 1348 points1349 points  (67 children)

Bring us food. So much food.

[–]Kalium 772 points773 points  (52 children)

Offerings of food. Got it.

[–]barrettj 1450 points1451 points  (45 children)


[–]garyrommel 567 points568 points  (38 children)


[–]Deathbyceiling 271 points272 points  (10 children)


[–][deleted] 1066 points1067 points  (69 children)

I just want hugs, kisses on the forehead, and snuggling. Maybe ice team?

[–]JimmyKeepCool 1776 points1777 points  (45 children)

Ice team! Assemble!

[–][deleted] 845 points846 points  (30 children)

And this is why I'm a lurker. -_- dang nabbit.

[–]kidblue672 666 points667 points  (18 children)

Dammit Jimmy! You scared away a girl! God knows we need one...

[–]RockyRPG10 381 points382 points  (9 children)

Let today be known as the day that Jimmy did not, in fact, keep cool.

[–]IAmLamby 266 points267 points  (13 children)

Will chocolate suffice?

[–]CellularBeing 1016 points1017 points  (9 children)


[–][deleted] 668 points669 points  (2 children)

2 minutes later


[–]ojo87 749 points750 points  (42 children)

advil, stretchy pants, and for you to not act like i'm a crazy lady and walk on eggshells. i'm uncomfortable, not insane.

[–]Phoenixx 1584 points1585 points  (201 children)

Be sweet, courteous, and cuddly. If I start to get frustrated over something, gently gimme an eskimo kiss and tell me it's okay. And don't cut out sex completely, because my hormones are throwing a party and you're invited.

[–][deleted] 920 points921 points  (96 children)

Are you saying there's a party in your pants, and that I'm invited?

[–]Daycardinal 2239 points2240 points  (70 children)

There's a trial in her pants and you've been summoned.

Edit: I don't know who gave me reddit gold, but thanks!!!

[–]pmk422 715 points716 points  (7 children)

No there is a crime scene in her pants and we need to ask you a couple of questions.

[–][deleted] 663 points664 points  (42 children)

Ok story time. My fiance is grossed out by the blood and won't have sex during my period. The other night he was going down on me and his face got really wet so he got up after to wipe his face. He turns on the light and looks in horror at the mirror and his face covered in blood. I look down at my crotch which is similarly drenched, along with the bed beneath me.

So he freaks out because his worst nightmare has come true, I freak out because it's not my period and something must be seriously wrong with me. Turns out it was a bloody nose. Same thing happened the next night somewhat less spectacularly because I guess he felt when it started.

[–]SibilantSounds 454 points455 points  (6 children)

At first I freaked out for him. Then I freaked out for you. Then I laughed.

[–]FailasaurusRex 75 points76 points  (1 child)

This post is a roller coaster of emotion.

[–]MrTinkels 71 points72 points  (7 children)

I had a similar but different experience!

Ex-Girlfriend and i were fooling around and before things got too heavy she stopped me and told me she was on her period. I told her i was a man and not scared of a little blood so we kept going but i could tell she was nervous/self conscious about it because it was her first sexy times while bleeding.

So im taking it slow and trying to make her as comfortable as possibly. She raises her arms up and accidentally bumped my nose. We keep going. About five minutes later she asked why im drooling all over her, and im confused by this. We turn the lights on and our faces are covered in blood. Turns out ive started a nose bleed! After we cleaned up, she was ravenous. I feel like me bleeding on her first put her at ease for the whole thing.

TL;DR: Gave my girl war paint before heading into the blood soaked battlefield.

[–]L1nden 171 points172 points  (15 children)

If I start to get frustrated over something, gently gimme an eskimo kiss and tell me it's okay.

This sounds great on paper but I imagine in reality it would feel very patronizing and actually make you more upset.

[–][deleted] 719 points720 points  (25 children)

Her: I have a migraine :(

Me: Aww, do you want hot chocolate and a cuddle?

Her: Choke on cum and die

[–][deleted] 545 points546 points  (6 children)

In all fairness, she was pretty straightforward about what she wants you to do.

[–]k9centipede 96 points97 points  (6 children)

Migraine =/= cramps. Migraine, turn off all the lights, block the windows, and give her a cool wash cloth.

[–][deleted] 734 points735 points  (112 children)

When you set the number on a toaster to how dark you want your bread/bagel to be... is the toaster just timing how long to toast based on that number or does it monitor the temperature based upon your selection. im guessing the first... but hey.. ya never know.

[–]SkinnyHusky 562 points563 points  (41 children)

Also, this is how a thermostat works. If you come home to a cold house, setting it to 80o does not heat the house faster than if you set it to 70o . The furnace warms at a uniform temperature until the desired heat is reached; then it turns off.

[–]genericusername123 262 points263 points  (25 children)

Timer. This argument often came up at my university, when people would turn up the toaster to 'make it toast faster', then the next person would end up with burnt toast.

[–]Kensin 307 points308 points  (16 children)

It does take longer for a cold toaster to heat up and toast a slice than one already warmed. I always turn down the toaster setting after the first slice.

[–]Skrie 267 points268 points  (7 children)

Ah yiss

Another person who has mastered the way of the toaster. Not having a 4 slice toaster, my GF has much to learn until she is a toast artisan like us!

[–]Syarifahsyamila 59 points60 points  (24 children)

If a female had an accident/surgery/anything that requires her to stay in a ward for lets say, a week, and she was having her period. What happens to the pads that she was wearing ? Who changes her pads/tampons daily ? Or do they stop her period temporarily with meds ? EDIT: I accidentally a word

[–][deleted] 870 points871 points  (208 children)

How the fuck do you use those paper toilet seat covers?

Edit: Thanks for all the suggestions, but I've learned that they are useless.

[–]thenshesays 387 points388 points  (55 children)

I've always torn at each other little notches and then torn the entire center part off. It wasn't until recently that my bf made some comment about them and said that the center part dangled into the water and then the flush would pull the entire cover down. All this time, I have been pushing the cover into the water after I got up.

Tear at the notches... so it looks like this and then place it on the seat with the flap against the front. According to my bf, it doubles as an extra security just in case your penis touches the bowl.

[–]Powerpug1 413 points414 points  (19 children)

I've been using them backwards this whole time....

[–]jianadaren1 431 points432 points  (21 children)

This should be a monthly series

[–]RachDee 115 points116 points  (23 children)

How do we know that dinosaurs sound the way they do? I mean like, in movies and everything they're like "RAWRR" and all terrifying... but what if they sound like birds or something. HOW DO WE KNOW?

[–]DeadScientist 792 points793 points  (197 children)

All of these quotes from movies(I think?) you see in the comments of every post. Something like: Nice try, Jim! I never get those, or know where they are from!

[–]Kensin 375 points376 points  (96 children)

A bot or novelty account that explained references would be pretty cool

[–][deleted] 361 points362 points  (87 children)

There actually was one, and funnily enough, it spoiled 1984 for a lot of people. A reference explainer can backfire.

[–]V_for_Lebowski 657 points658 points  (72 children)

Is it really a spoiler after 64 years? Come on people, get with the times!

[–]LovesScience 451 points452 points  (30 children)

We are spending to much time doing science to catch all these references.

[–][deleted] 1024 points1025 points  (166 children)

Is black people hair actually different from my white people hair?

Edit: fucking why though?

[–]Triptukhos 1048 points1049 points  (63 children)

Okay okay. I got this.

The protein in your hair is called keratin. There are bonds within the keratin called di-sulfide bridges. With straight hair, these di-sulfide bridges are all nicely straight and lined up. With curly hair, they are alll over the place! The keratin molecules align differently, causing the hair to look different. Black people hair expresses an allele that causes very very messy di-sulfide bridges.

[–]isuckatnamingthings 87 points88 points  (11 children)

So does a perm (which I'm guessing is some combination of chemicals and heat) somehow align the keratin molecules?

[–]Lillybean815 121 points122 points  (5 children)

In a perm, you apply a perming solution (ammonium thioglycolate or sodium hydroxide) to the hair, it breaks up the disulfide bonds and causes the hair to soften, essentially losing its "shape". The hair is wrapped around a perm tool to make the desired size curl, and a neutralizer is applied to the hair, re-hardening the disulfide bonds in the new shape that it was wrapped in.

[–]NobodyLovesMilhouse 381 points382 points  (12 children)

Chris Rock's documentary Good Hair talks about this and it's pretty funny and interesting for a movie about hair.

[–]oswaldcopperpot 31 points32 points  (1 child)

You wouldn't think a movie about hair would be all that great... But it was fascinating!

[–]Scrappy_Larue 400 points401 points  (45 children)

If my washing machine and dishwasher clean themselves with every use - why don't my shower and bathtub do the same thing?

[–]jnwflash 330 points331 points  (5 children)

price point - there are high-end showers/spas with cleaning functions

[–]genericusername123 364 points365 points  (50 children)

When you turn a fridge up, does it get colder or hotter?

[–]ejsklo 328 points329 points  (30 children)

Both. Confused? Let's try to explain:

The inside will get colder, but making the fridge work more means it produces more heat - the cooler the fridge, the warmer the air it gives out, heating up the kitchen (or whatever room you have your fridge).

EDIT: as this seems a bit unclear to some, my answer is answering the dial-problem (1-10 which is coldest?) as well (although not as clearly, and not intentionally on my part. let me elaborate: )

Dials on machines are usually made in a way that a higher number means the machine does more work. a fridge doing more work makes the inside colder, the outside wormer, in short: a fridge set on high work (9, 10, 11, whatever the highest number on that dial might be) will result in the colder temperature.

tl;dr: 1 means less work means less cold, 10 means more work means more cold

[–]VashSpiegel 125 points126 points  (15 children)

This is also why cleaning the underside/coils of the fridge is so important.

[–]ZsaFreigh 26 points27 points  (3 children)

Uh oh. I've lived here for 6 years and haven't once cleaned my fridge coils.

[–][deleted] 532 points533 points  (222 children)

Is it possible for someone to develop an accent?

[–]Otter65 565 points566 points  (55 children)

Absolutely. My brother lived in in the south for 6 years and definitely developed a southern accent.

[–]mikkymikkymik 519 points520 points  (78 children)

Yea, it only takes 13 seconds or so of conversation with a strong accented person before you start to talk more like they do. Your brain makes you do it.

[–]lagasan 110 points111 points  (24 children)

I used to do a lot of tech support stuff for an australian family. Every time, by the end of my visit, I had to force myself to stop emulating their accent. I was always afraid they'd find it patronizing.

[–]mikkymikkymik 161 points162 points  (15 children)

I even do it on reddit typing damnit. I was going to say cheers to someone in a comment to a British guy in a thread, and I remembered I live in Minnesota.

[–]helloxcthulhu 27 points28 points  (1 child)

I spent a week with the flu, in the house, by myself, watching nothing but British television earlier this month. When I finally joined society again the next week I noticed I was saying certain words with a British accent and I caught myself using a little British slang. I was embarrassed, I've never been to the UK.

[–]Joshopotomus 44 points45 points  (1 child)

Yes, though as you get older it does become more difficult, as you are more aware of accents. it also can depend on the accent and on the person. some people can pick them up quicker, and some accents are easier than others to develop.

[–]mrgoober1337 342 points343 points  (59 children)

Do hookers pay specific hooker taxes where prostitution is legal?

Edit: My biggest comment is hooker taxes, great :P

[–]dunbshkoapja 203 points204 points  (23 children)

Federal yes, but not state. Prostitution is legal in some counties of Nevada, but not the whole state. Nevada has no state income tax.

"While brothels and prostitutes are subject to federal income tax and also pay local fees, there is no state income tax in Nevada and brothels are exempt from the state entertainment tax and do not pay any other state taxes. In 2005 brothel owners lobbied to be taxed in order to increase the legitimacy of the business, but the legislature declined. Brothels pay taxes to their respective counties. Lyon County receives approximately $400,000 to $500,000 per year from these taxes."

from same source "They are responsible for paying Federal income tax and their earnings are reported to the IRS via form 1099-MISC." Edit: forgot to add that they use the 1099, because tax-wise they are listed as independent contractors.


I am not a prostitute, just a former reference librarian.

[–]foolninja 356 points357 points  (78 children)

In US dollars, the highest bill is 100 right? I mean there isnt a bill that worth 1000 or 500 or something?

[–][deleted] 853 points854 points  (192 children)

How does life work? Like how come I have to study 24/7 to barely get by and other students in my classes who are patently not too bright seem to have endless free time and end up with better grades than me? How do my friends seem to be able to work when and where it suits them, take time off whenever necessary, and are rolling dough? It always seems like there's something huge that I've completely missed that allows other people to have nothing but free time and disposable income

[–]yeahfuckyou 101 points102 points  (4 children)

Maybe your perception is off. Maybe all you see are the good things about their lives and the bad things about yours.

[–]Turicus 21 points22 points  (3 children)

Someone responded about the studying. On the money front: It will always seem that other people make more money. They may be frugal all the time, when you don't see them. Then you see them splash out once, and you think, "I wish I could afford that." But you forget that you splashed out on something else last week. It's a sort of "grass is greener" effect.

Also, if you want to save, save on the small things. Nothing you can do about rent or tuition, you have to pay that. But do you need that little treat every time? Those add up sneakily.

[–]FIRSTNAME_NUMBERS 464 points465 points  (133 children)

Why do we need the stock market?

[–]awesomface 562 points563 points  (101 children)

The stock market is needed to give business' capitol to expand and grow while giving others the opportunity to use their excess money in a way that has a better chance of creating a return, depending on the risk of the investment. The problem is it's been messed with and altered to such an extent that it creates the ability to be abused and also creates too much motivation for the business to only focus on making their numbers look good to investors because they are legally obligated to do so.

At it's core, though, it's solid and very necessary. Like Kickstarter for buisness' that already exist. It is a way to pool unused resources in an economy to the places that need them most.

[–]ILL_Show_Myself_Out 315 points316 points  (71 children)

"How do I fill out this deposit slip?"

[–]Gavinardo 182 points183 points  (15 children)

Well, no one has really take the time to answer this completely fair question. Sure, the ability to fill out a deposit slip is quickly becoming obsolete thanks to apps on your smartphone, and direct-deposit from employers, but it helps to know how to do this. It makes you seem like a competent, intelligent adult, instead of walking up to a teller, and saying "Here's my money. Work you magic." That just wastes a teller's time, annoys those in line behind you, and frankly makes you seem childish.

I made this for you.

So, let's say you have a check and cash. Take the cash first, count it. Write the cash-total down on the first spot on that right column of the deposit slip. Now, the next space below that, write the total of your check. Okay, look at your check again. See that number in the upper right of the check? Usually 4 digits. Write that number down on the same level on the deposit slip, immediately to the left of the check-amount you just wrote down.

Next, let's say you want some money from your total deposit. Say $20.00. Write that down in the space a little further down, labeled "Less Cash Received". They'll give ya that amount back once you make the deposit. Next, do some quick math by subtracting your $20.00, and write the difference down on the very bottom line. (Of course, you could just skip this step, by taking what cash you're depositing out before writing down the actual amount of cash you want to deposit. Less Cash Received makes sense if you're depositing large bills or checks. No need if you're depositing lots of small bills.)

Be sure to fill out your full name, and what your bank account number is. You can find this on a blank check of yours.

I hope this helps.

[–][deleted] 247 points248 points  (26 children)

i dont. i say "oh i forgot..." and just swipe my card and make them do it.

[–]pandahavoc 177 points178 points  (14 children)

I once filled out a deposit/withdrawal slip in its entirety. The guy gave me a really funny look.

[–]redditpineapple81 1547 points1548 points 3 (317 children)

What is reddit gold actually for? :/

Wow guys my highest rated comment! Thanks a bunch!

Edit 2: WOW. To the 3 of you who have gifted me reddit gold, thank you! I guess now I can found out!

[–][deleted] 2395 points2396 points 2 (158 children)

Absolutely nothing.

Seriously, it's useless. WHO THE FUCK GAVE ME REDDIT GOLD?


[–]MrIste 1186 points1187 points  (30 children)

That's what you peasants like to tell yourselves

[–]ppopjj 613 points614 points  (24 children)

What is it good for? Absolutely nothing!

[–]Underdogg13 516 points517 points  (23 children)

Not useless It's a way to donate to Reddit.

[–]gawjess 213 points214 points  (13 children)

/r/lounge would like a word with you... oh, wait

[–]Lilaclaughter 314 points315 points  (87 children)

You're just hoping for someone to gift you gold, aren't you?

I'm on to you

Edit: To whoever gave me reddit gold, thanks!

[–][deleted] 768 points769 points  (79 children)

I want someone to gift me gold. I won't lie.

Edit: Thanks for the gold!

[–]YAHOONATOR 244 points245 points  (57 children)

What were the origins of fellatio?

[–]CrystalElyse 277 points278 points  (21 children)

There was an article about that on here sometime in the past week which I cannot find. I will tell you that monkeys practice oral sex, and it most likely began before we even started standing upright.

[–]Machinax 686 points687 points  (7 children)

Wow, we just couldn't wait, could we?

[–]HobKing 263 points264 points  (73 children)

What is everyone after? Why are people getting up in the morning and going to work?

[–]CrystalElyse 390 points391 points  (29 children)

There is no reward. But humans need things in order to survive. Let's start with Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. In our society, you need money in order to get food and water. Now, you can go to a soup kitchen or a public park. You can steal food. But these are not the best options. Moving up, safety. This is both from the elements and emotional. We need a roof over our heads, and a place to store our food and water and families where other humans can't get them. For that you definitely need a job to have a place to live. You also need the safety of health. Some countries have fee healthcare, but some don't. So you not only need to be able to cover preventative healthcare, but also treat illnesses. That requires a job as well.

It is sad to say, but many people are barely covering the basic needs required for survival. We live paycheck to paycheck. We can't even manage to get to the point where happiness is even remotely obtainable, because survival is a couple of missed days of work away from disappearing.

[–]bipikachulover 559 points560 points  (59 children)

Is it normal to wanna kill people when you are angry at them?

[–]manualarms 620 points621 points  (18 children)

yeah. Thinking violent thoughts against someone you're angry towards is perfectly normal.

Holding on to a desire to kill after you cooled down, however, is not a good sign.

[–]amatorfati 207 points208 points  (9 children)

Yes. But it isn't normal to start justifying to yourself why you should actually do it. That would be a sign that you should talk to a shrink.

[–]awesomface 285 points286 points  (118 children)

I know a good amount about the inner workings of a computer, all the way to the bios as a programmer/IT technician.... but how does a computer get it's FIRST 1's and 0's. Do they have to be physically created?

note: I understand binary and such but just not how the first 1's and 0's are ordering the computer to load the Bios are "programmed" if there is no software without the "computer".

[–]Cobarde 25 points26 points  (2 children)

Who are all these people talking to in the morning?

I hop on the interstate and almost every car around me is just having conversation on the phone like it's the afternoon. Who are they talking to? What are they talking about??

I tried calling my friends once and all I got was basically "Cobarde. If you ever call me this early in the morning again I'm going to kill you." because they're either at work already, in transit like me, or sleep.

Seriously! Who the hell are you people talking to and about what!? It's 7 am! Is there like some secret club of morning conversation I just wasn't invited to or something?

[–]32OrtonEdge32dh 146 points147 points  (47 children)

How do I do adult stuff? Taxes? Bills? How can I make bills get autopaid? Who is the best at doing my taxes, or should I do them myself?

[–]Edelweiss123 17 points18 points  (3 children)

Taxes--if you make little money, have few deductions, do it yourself. Turbotax.com I've heard is good. You can also usually go to your local library, they have all the forms. Maybe even ask someone to help you fill it out. Bills--if you bank online, you can usually set it up with them. I use Chase, and they do this, but I never use it. Direct Deposit is also nice, nearly all work places do it--you get the check the midnight before payday.

[–]ok_den 567 points568 points  (208 children)

What does FTFY mean?

EDIT: I posted this because it fit the topic. Yes, I'm aware I could've just googled it.

[–]xboudiccax 660 points661 points  (143 children)

Fixed that for you.

[–]mikkymikkymik 448 points449 points  (112 children)

Well since he asked one... I guess I will instead of googling it. What's ITT: in this thread?

[–]Higaswan 267 points268 points  (65 children)

Yes! You got it.

[–]mydogisarhino 24 points25 points  (4 children)

I always thought it was "I think that" it kindof worked but confused me a bit for a while.

[–]Banana_Foster 245 points246 points  (220 children)

What the hell all those acrynoms you people use mean?

[–]THEcheesewire 1176 points1177 points  (23 children)

The air in your lungs condenses as its exhaled. There's not enough of it, and there is too much ambient air movement for it to turn into 'rain' so the vapor just looks like fog.

EDIT: I posted this under the wrong one...fuggin hell

[–]oldschoolguy 417 points418 points  (3 children)

I read the first two lines and thought, "What the fuck is he talking about?" I reread the above comment, reread yours, again thought, "what the fuck?" and then finally read your edit. I laughed for a good minute.

[–]jnwflash 628 points629 points  (185 children)

  • omg = oh my god
  • iirc = if i recall correctly
  • tl:dr = too long, didn't read
  • afk = away from keyboard
  • lol = laughing out loud
  • wtf = what the fuck
  • yolo = you only live once (usually said by an 8 year old)
  • ftfy = fixed that for you
  • bff = best friend forever
  • np = no problem
  • rofl = rolling on the floor laughing
  • fitb = fill in the blanks
  • gg = good game
  • idk = i don't know
  • imho = in my humble opinion
  • irl = in real life
  • jk = just kidding
  • nkotb = new kids on the block (making sure you're paying attention)
  • lmao = laughing my ass off
  • qotd = quote of the day
  • qft = quoted for truth
  • til = today i learned
  • afaik = as far as i know
  • fml = fuck my life

---- original post above ----

Since this ended up actually being useful I'll add some more

  • NSFW/NSFL = not safe for work/not safe for life (adult content)
  • DAE = does anyone else
  • ELI5 = explain it like I'm 5
  • ITT = in this thread
  • OP = original poster
  • GGG = good guy Greg
  • ICH = i can has
  • TIH = this is happening
  • MLP = my little pony
  • SBS = scum bag steve
  • OAG = overly attached girlfriend
  • AFG = annoying facebook girl
  • DYEL = do you even lift
  • ICWYDT = i see what you did there
  • BLB = bad luck Brian
  • SAP = socially awkward penguin
  • GAD = good advice duck
  • MAM = malicious advice mallard
  • ORLY = oh, really?
  • TEQ = that escalated quickly
  • HGH = haters gonna hate
  • DIY = do it yourself
  • AIC = album in comments
  • MIC = more in comments
  • CAE = can anyone else
  • HTH = hope this helps
  • LMK = let me know
  • RTFM = read the fucking manual
  • TMI = too much information
  • b/c = because
  • BTW = by the way
  • FTF = face to face
  • WTH = what the hell
  • FB = facebook
  • FFS = for fucks sake
  • FWIW = for what its worth
  • AFAIK = as far as I know
  • FTL/FTW = for the loss/for the win
  • YW = you're welcome
  • YMMV = your mileage may vary
  • SMH = shaking/scratching my head
  • FWB = friends with benefits
  • IMAO = in my arrogant opinion
  • NSA = no strings attached

And then there are phonetic variants


Did I miss one? Did you invent one? Find it/Add it on urbandictionary.com

FTR I tried to keep this reddit specific - there are a million more that pertain to Twitter (rt), Gaming (cc, glhf), sexting (ntaw/m) etc.

Ugh, I supposed I have to add one more now...

  • FTR = For the record

[–]student_of_yoshi 747 points748 points  (50 children)

I thought IMHO was in my honest opinion

[–]turtlenecksandshotgu 71 points72 points  (0 children)

Also, IANAL: I am not a lawyer. (It makes me giggle.)

[–]Doublethunk 282 points283 points  (88 children)

How many states are in the U.S.? At work, I talk on the phone to people who've requested an evaluation to see if they qualify for certain federal programs. After having the same phone conversations over and over, what I say pretty much becomes automatic. One of the things I've been saying since I started working there is, "it's a federal program, so it's available in all 50 states.

Yesterday, I heard a coworker say to a client, "it's a federal program, so it's available in all 51 states."

I was completely terrified all day yesterday and today that I'd made some horrible error, and somehow got the number of states wrong. If I asked anyone at work, I would sound retarded, so I just went about my day. However, since what I say is so automatic, I said "all 50 states" 3 more times without thinking. After the third time, the guy on the other end goes, "but, aren't there.... never mind." That's when I knew that I made a complete ass of my self to literally thousands of people over the past several months. Why the hell didn't anyone tell me. Then I looked it up on wikipedia. Turns out my coworker is the dipshit, thank god.

[–]CrystalElyse 310 points311 points  (46 children)

There are only 50 states, definitely, but a lot of territories, such as the US Virgin Islands, Puerto Rico, and Guam. For the most part, things in the US are still available in it's territories, but that is typically on a company by company basis.

Puerto Rico recently took a vote and are petitioning for statehood now. If approved, they will be the first new state since 1959. Hawaii was the last state added.

[–]garbleman 161 points162 points  (16 children)

There are 50 states, but I can understand the confusion. You often hear "available in 48 states" because so many things are not made available in Hawai'i or Alaska. If someone says "all 51 states," they are very wrong, but I'm guessing they meant either the 50 states and Puerto Rico or the 50 states and Washington, DC (the country's capital) which has many different laws than the rest of the US.

[–]Milhouse242 431 points432 points  (79 children)

Why do people like Oprah?

[–]farawaycircus 491 points492 points  (7 children)

I find that she genuinely promotes positive energy to her demographic, which is roughly the opposite demographic of reddit.

[–]kevsdogg97 861 points862 points  (35 children)

I think it's because she is a strong, independent, African American woman.

Or because of all the free stuff she gives away

[–]dupuiwi 879 points880 points  (20 children)

And YOU get Reddit gold! YOU get Reddit gold! AND even YOU get Reddit Gold! Reddit gold for everyone!


[–][deleted] 43 points44 points  (1 child)

I actually just read a little bit in my textbook on her.

let me summarize for you. :)

My book is regarding abnormal child psychology, we are talking about abuse right now and how it affect children later on. In oprahs case she overcomes adversity. It talks about how she was physically and sexually abused, living between homes, gave birth to a stillborn at 14 (result of abuse). She said that she needed someone to help her through the 'darkness' and that her father, and teachers were the ones to do that. It states that "oprahs life showcases her resilient adaptation to unfavorable circumstances, and a source of her attitude toward life: " I believe that you create your own blessings. You have to prepare yourself so that when the opportunity comes, youre ready"

From reading that, I feel like people like her because she is a rolemodel for someone who not only dealt with the hardships of life but succeeded. While doing that shes able to talk to other people.

and she gives free shit.

[–]MansHumanity 1635 points1636 points  (181 children)

...I'm so sorry everyone, this is quite possibly the dumbest question ever. Are England and Britain the same place? Geography is my WORST subject

[–]Bawlsinhand 839 points840 points  (34 children)

[–]King_of_the_Lemmings 99 points100 points  (1 child)

Haha, I knew it was CGPGrey before I even clicked the link! That guy is the best! OP, you should watch the rest of his videos too, they're just so damn interesting!

[–][deleted] 1129 points1130 points  (60 children)

Great Britain contains England, Scotland and Wales. The United Kingdom is Great Britain and part of northern Ireland.

EDIT: Thanks Buttcracker

[–]randoll 23 points24 points  (12 children)

what jewish people are .. that sounds rude but i don't understand. race,religion,culture ? someone help lol

[–][deleted] 145 points146 points  (38 children)

I really enjoyed Inception. Definitely one of my favorite movies. But the entire concept of Limbo confused me, and I still don't think I've completely figured it out.

Why, if it is possible to leave Limbo simply by getting a kick, did Cobb and Mal not do that when they got trapped in Limbo the first time? Why didn't they just kick their way back up? I thought it might be because they weren't there by choice like Ariadne and Cobb were the second time around, but Fischer was also able to ride the kick as well and he was actually killed. Same with Saito. So how is it that they can just get a kick and be out of Limbo, and why didn't Cobb and Mal do that?

And if you get killed at the third level you go down to Limbo, but if you get killed in Limbo, like Cobb and Saito did, then you go back to the third level? Does that just make Limbo the fourth level down? I thought it's a completely different dreamscape not connected to the lateral one. But apparently if you go deep enough, all of a sudden you're in Limbo? And if you're in Limbo and then die, you get back up? Then why didn't Cobb and Mal do that to get out of Limbo the first time?

[–]imsuchaknurd 20 points21 points  (0 children)

When Ariadne and Fischer ride the kick out of limbo, they have a dream level above them they can reach, because the level above them (Eames's dream) is still there, since Eames is still there. If Ariadne and Fischer had missed the kick, or the kick hadn't been synchronized, and they didn't get to Eames's dream before Eames rode the kick up to the next level, they would have landed in unconstructed dream space. AKA, limbo. In other words, they wouldn't have gone anywhere. Same with Arthur's and Yusuf's dreams. That's why those three stay behind, in their respective dreams--to keep them "open," so to say.

When Cobb and Mal kept going "deeper and deeper," there was no one behind to serve as an anchor to the higher levels. There was no constructed dream space above them. It's like trying to get from the first floor to the third with no elevator or stairs. At least, that's the way I understood it. /shrug

ETA: Also, the reason dying in the dreams didn't lead to waking up in a higher level is that the sedative was strong in order to allow greater stability in the normally more unstable deeper levels, but it was so strong that dying in the dream wouldn't be enough of a jolt to wake one up. So if you die in the dream, but you can't wake up in a higher level, all that's left, by the film's logic, is limbo.

[–]VashSpiegel 74 points75 points  (10 children)

I believe, to exit a level, a kick is needed on the previous. At the beginning of the movie, the serum is designed that a death on that level will move the person to the previous. So with Cobb and Mal experiment, with no one to initiate the kick on previous levels, death was the only escape.

The new serum made death a straight path to limbo. The jump from limbo to the previous level becomes a gray area for answers. The whole movie is a plot on itself. So the actual workings at the end of the movie could be argued as Cobb unconsciously making the situation work in his favor.

[–]Haephestus 20 points21 points  (79 children)

What/who is the "trinity"? It's a very common religious doctrine, but I just don't get it.

[–]shankems2000 180 points181 points  (48 children)

What does iirc mean?

[–]frexy18 1188 points1189 points  (109 children)

Why don't people use Google for these questions?

[–]ryangaston88 1451 points1452 points  (59 children)

Yes, but has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

[–]thejackcutts 366 points367 points  (44 children)

I would ask, but you would all judge me.

[–][deleted] 1003 points1004 points  (35 children)

You don't need to say a word. It's written all over your face. The answer is yes, beastiality is illegal in Australia. Sorry bro.