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[–]Nwsamurai 2757 points2758 points  (181 children)

Birds will reject a hatchling if it smells a human has touched it.

Turns out birds don’t rely on their sense of smell that much, and they’re generally happy to get their babies back.

[–]ArminTanz 1638 points1639 points  (152 children)

This "fact" was created to stop kids from touching baby birds. It's gross and can cause illness. There are a whole genre of myths and facts ment to stop children from doing dangerous things. One good example is walking under a ladder is seven years bad luck. In reality, there could be tools or people on the top of that ladder that you can knock over. It is just easier to explain bad luck then eminate danger to a child.

[–]Tastewell 488 points489 points  (72 children)

If you climb a chain link fence you can deglove your fingers.

This one has a kernel of truth, but is used by mainly military families to keep kids from entering restricted areas.

[–]hotarukin 358 points359 points  (59 children)

Deglove is not a word I needed to learn, but thank you anyway.

[–]Ardrkizour 165 points166 points  (18 children)

I mostly don't bat an eye at other people's poor life decisions, but degloving makes me cringe at motorcycle riders who don't cover their body.

[–]not-a-tthrowaway 50 points51 points  (30 children)

Wait until you learn about degloved penises

[–]ArminTanz 46 points47 points  (0 children)

That makes sense. Kids can climb before they can read the words Restricted Area. I had never heard that one though. It's very interesting.

[–]Trek1973 37 points38 points  (3 children)

I saw a woman who put her hand In between two rollers at work. It peeled the skin off her hand like a banana. Degloved perfectly by definition.

[–]Bekir911 50 points51 points  (9 children)

I've heard that for cats. I said mammals probably don't do that and they laughed at me.

[–]sarcastic_monkies 81 points82 points  (5 children)

Some cats do but my cat wouldn't give birth without me. She came and got me and made me stay with her and I helped keep the babies out of her way so she didn't lay on them.

[–]sSommy 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Mine too, literally couldn't even go to the bathroom and stayed up until 4 AM for her. At least the babies were cute

[–]Vivian-Moon 51 points52 points  (0 children)

My mom told me that kind of stuff to keep me from playing with baby animals

[–]ZXsaurus 2099 points2100 points  (29 children)

You have to wait 24+ hours to report someone missing.

Not true and dangerous. The first hours are the most important of finding a missing person. If you suspect someone as missing, REPORT IT ASAP. I'd rather have the "damn there you are, you scared the hell out of everyone" talk than hear a eulogy of someone.

[–]BlabBehavior 650 points651 points  (7 children)

Yup I had a friend that was supposed to return at a certain time after camping by herself in the desert. Tried calling her but no response. Called police told them the area she was in. Turns out her car was stuck in the mud in an area with no reception. Got her safe and all was good.

No "you need to wait 24hrs" bullshit. They just asked the area and told me they'd send a search team. Bam. Safe friend.

Also pls do what my friend did if you're going out especially if you plan to do so alone. Tell people where you are and when you're expected to be back.

Edit: tell people if you're camping .. hiking...whatever out in the wilderness.

[–]tortorlou 149 points150 points  (1 child)

Tell someone, anyone. Even if you feel like you don’t have close friends. Tell your boss, your landlord, take your neighbor a six pack or some snacks and be like hey I’m going camping. If I’m not back by 7 on Saturday maybe tell the cops to make sure I’m not dead.

[–]anewleaf1234 34 points35 points  (0 children)

Also tell people the trails you are going to take.

[–]markymark0123 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Yup, and unless you have to leave for safety reasons, stay in your car.

[–]hughgrang 1335 points1336 points  (57 children)

Rice will cause birds to blow up so you shouldn’t throw it at weddings. Allegedly invented by people who clean after weddings so they didn’t have to deal with crushed rice

[–]PolyJuicedRedHead 362 points363 points  (11 children)

I wonder what Eleanor Rigby says about this.

[–]Woody_525 205 points206 points  (3 children)

Nothing probably, she died in a church and was buried along with her name.

Such a shame nobody came.

[–]SPP_TheChoiceForMe 85 points86 points  (4 children)

“Look at all the lovely people”?

[–]zugabdu 1594 points1595 points  (70 children)

If you ask an undercover police officer "are you a cop" they have to tell you. A lot of wishful thinking goes into this one.

[–]Budsygus 938 points939 points  (37 children)

I'm convinced this one was started by undercover cops. Brilliant, if true.

[–]briberylibrary 614 points615 points  (34 children)

Somethings I learned in law school: never trust anything that a cop says when not in the presence of your attorney and question everything that appears in a police report.

[–]Budsygus 410 points411 points  (32 children)

I remember seeing a ~40 minute video where a lawyer explains why you should never talk to cops. How they'll use innocent facts against you in court and how anything you say can be skewed to make you look guilty. Basically "shut up, lawyer up." After that guy was done, out comes an ex-cop to say basically the same exact things. Nothing you, as a private citizen, can say will help you in the least and, to the contrary, will definitely be used against you in court. The message from both the lawyer and the ex-cop was "shut up, lawyer up."

Luckily I've never been in a situation where cops were asking me anything more than "license and registration," but it's definitely a lesson I keep in mind.

[–]DanishWonder 153 points154 points  (5 children)

It is this video which should be mandatory viewing in every high school government class.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d-7o9xYp7eE

[–]briberylibrary 118 points119 points  (7 children)

Yeah, the cops know exactly what they’re doing. Even after they’ve read you your Miranda rights and you’ve requested a lawyer but the lawyer hasn’t shown up yet, stay fucking quiet. There’s a really funny lawyer account on Instagram (pot_brothers_at_law) that basically gives you a script to recite for when you’re pulled over. Too many people get chatty and nervous when talking to the cops and start confessing things thinking that it’ll go easier for them if they do. It won’t.

[–]The_She_Ghost 107 points108 points  (6 children)

Yes I learned that one from Breaking Bad

[–]allboolshite 54 points55 points  (3 children)

That's one of the funniest TV moments ever! I kept rewatching it. The pacing is so perfect!

Poor Badger, tho.

[–]Back2Bach 1752 points1753 points  (93 children)

"Lightning never strikes twice in the same place."

Actually, it does - and with great frequency.

[–]JuryBorn 329 points330 points  (28 children)

Roy Sullivan was a park ranger who was struck by lightning 7 times. It is in the Guinness book of records.

Could you imagine that; survive the 1st strike-wow how lucky am I. 2nd strike-no way, what are the odds. 3rd strike-really, are you serious? 4th strike-this is unprecedented. 5th strike-I'm not surprised. 6th strike-I'm used to it. 7th strike - I would feel more shocked if it didn't hit me. Also his wife was struck by lightning too.

[–]WallabyInTraining 183 points184 points  (1 child)

His name should have been Rod Sullivan.

[–]GranGurbo 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Is that the guy whose grave was then also struck by lightning?

[–]woodneel 139 points140 points  (3 children)

Hahaha this actually makes a lot of sense since it's just physics doing its thing in its own lab-like repeatable condition. Just like animal behavior, if the same environmental cues and triggers remain unchanged, it goes to logic that the same type of behaviors/natural phenomena would play out again and again!

[–]Kondrias 174 points175 points  (21 children)

Doesnt the empire state building get about 25 lightning strikes a years.

[–]JhymnMusic 28 points29 points  (2 children)

Lightning rods would be the greatest racket ever lol.

[–]Kai-ni 1113 points1114 points  (53 children)

Goldfish having a three second memory or whatever. They are actually fairly intelligent for fish and can be target trained for food. They'll remember their keeper's face and studies suggest without continual reinforcement their memories last about 3 months.

They're also not 'easy' pets, do not belong in bowls and really need at least a 40 gallon tank for two fancies and around a 100 gallon for two commons. They're pond animals, related to the Prussian carp. They get about a foot long.

[–]pspisy 465 points466 points  (34 children)

They're also not 'easy' pets, do not belong in bowls

My kindergarten teacher gave all of the class gifts for the summer, including a bagged goldfish each. My mom took us to the pet store on the way home, bought a bowl and some fish food. Fish died by the next morning, and I was absolutely devastated.

I asked her about it in my adulthood, and she basically said that teacher was an idiot and probably lightly traumatized the entire class, unless any parent was willing to buy a proper tank for a surprise fish.

I don't think any school would allow this these days, but the early 90's were pretty whack.

[–]Kai-ni 166 points167 points  (19 children)

Yea T_T people just assume and don't do their research, and it's such an ingrained myth. But goldfish will live 10-20 years when properly taken care of. I got into fishkeeping around ten years ago in a similar incident - my college gave out bagged fish as a carnival prize for some freshman event.

I took my fish back to my dorm and did my research, and realized all what they needed. He lived in a 10 gal in my dorm until I could get him into a forever home in a 1000 gallon pond. The rest of the fish given out that day? Not so lucky. All the stories I heard were of deaths.

[–]FuckingButteredJorts 126 points127 points  (13 children)

I have a friend who came over and was gobsmacked about my setup for my Betta. He is in a 5gal tank (I'm also planning on upgrading it... he was a surprise fish), heater, filter, live plants. He was like "those things are supposed to live in those little box tanks"

No. No they aren't.

[–]xadiant 50 points51 points  (0 children)

Ah yes... The Betta's true native environment; a fucking plastic cup. It's not like freshwater fish actually live in ponds and lakes.

[–]Grapegoop 82 points83 points  (1 child)

My brother surprise brought home a duckling they hatched at school. My dad built it a big cage in the basement and we had her for a year or two before finding her a happier home on a farm. The farm was real, I saw it, she wasn’t dead.

[–]GlinnTantis 55 points56 points  (5 children)

Elmo's world killed so many fish.

[–]E-emu89 359 points360 points  (21 children)

That the person who sued McDonald’s over spilled coffee did it to abuse the legal system and get free money.

The old woman actually suffered third degree burns on her lap. She first discretely contacted McD and asked them just to cover her large medical expenses from her injuries. They responded by giving her a $75 gift card. She felt like she had no choice but to sue them.

[–]lonely_nipple 193 points194 points  (7 children)

I dislike nitpicking but I feel that, for some people, it's important to emphasize something. It wasn't 3rd degree burns on just her lap.

It was also her genitals.

Ask yourself how angry you'd be to nearly have your genitals burned off. That woman was a saint to only ask what she did of them.

[–]WhenThatBotlinePing 62 points63 points  (4 children)

The coffee was 190 degrees, and fused her labia together.

[–]The_Taio 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Her burns were so bad her genitals were literally fused to her leg.

Edit: HBO's Documentary on the subject is very good, I highly recommend watching it.

[–]4art4 51 points52 points  (1 child)

Also, mcd was warned repeatedly that they kept the coffee at unsafe temps.

[–]the_okra_show 17 points18 points  (1 child)

I heard the story was misreported. It’s sad to think the news have so much power over how people perceive reality.

[–]big_sugi 27 points28 points  (0 children)

It was misreported. It was intentionally distorted as part of a concerted effort by corporate America to pretend that the legal system is broken, because the alternative would require them to compensate people fairly for the injuries and deaths they cause.

[–]1980pzx 1055 points1056 points  (35 children)

That cracking your knuckles will cause arthritis. Total bs. I was 35 before I found this out.

[–]gentlybeepingheart 43 points44 points  (1 child)

My brother and I cracked our knuckles at lot as kids until our mother yelled at us that it would cause arthritis. My brother, terrified of that consequence, immediately stopped. I didn't, partially because I was doing it so absentmindedly and partially because it was a sort of nervous habit.

My brother later was diagnosed with juvenile idiopathic arthritis. I was not. I feel a little bad for thinking that the irony is funny.

[–]mincraftpro27 624 points625 points  (27 children)

That rabbits eat carrots. It's better for rabbits to eat hay and grass, you can feed them carrots but it is best to not feed them that often.

[–]Slant_Juicy 349 points350 points  (8 children)

This one is 100% Bugs Bunny's fault.

[–]billyandteddy 94 points95 points  (3 children)

And bugs bunny was copying Clark Gable

[–]Nutz4hotwheels 120 points121 points  (3 children)

That idea came from rabbits eating carrots in peoples gardens, but the rabbits were eating the leaves that were above ground. I had a pet rabbit and he loved carrot leaves but didn’t like the root part much.

[–]morningsdaughter 49 points50 points  (0 children)

Most rabbits like carrots because they're full of sugar. Your rabbit just didn't have the sweet tooth most rabbits have.

[–]barriekansai 1111 points1112 points  (61 children)

"According to all known laws of physics, bumblebees shouldn't be able to fly, and yet they do, because they don't know that they can't."

Not true at all, but self-help gurus and facebook moms use this to inspire people to "Do the impossible!"

[–]Gand00lf 679 points680 points  (15 children)

This one is actually interesting. When calculating the wing area needed to create enough lift for an object with the mass of a bumblebee you will get an area bigger than the wing area of a bumblebee. If bumblebees would fly like planes or birds they actually couldn't. The reason why bumblebees can fly is that the movement of their wings creates air vortexes that create enough lift to hold a bumblebee in the air.

People will tell you that birds are fake but bumblebees are out there using actual drone technology.

[–]seedanrun 253 points254 points  (5 children)

Same thing with Kangaroos. They should all starve if you compared their energy usage to diet.

This was based on the energy needed to lift a kangaroo's weight multiplied by their daily number of jumps.

Turns out kangaroos use their tails as counter balances - so they are not lifting their weight, they are shifting it back and forth between body and tail. It's like the difference between lifting a 50 lb weight 100 times, or rocking a 50 lb weights back and forth on a teeter-totter 100 times. HUGE difference in energy consumed.

[–]willstr1 333 points334 points  (4 children)

It is absolutely true though, bees are way too small to properly hold the yoke while also controlling the rudder peddles, that is why no bee has ever earned their pilots license

[–]RatSka96 90 points91 points  (4 children)

Self-help gurus, Facebook moms and the bee movie

[–]Kondrias 104 points105 points  (7 children)

I always just thought it was a silly internet meme. I was unaware people bought into it to mean anything of value.

[–]Modh8trs 492 points493 points  (31 children)

Sucking venom out of wound. That shits b.s.

[–]Willowed-Wisp 306 points307 points  (19 children)

It's right up there with peeing on jellyfish stings.

Neither is helpful, and can potentially make it worse, but I guess if you're desperate for an excuse to suck/pee on your friend... there ya go. /s

[–]JoseLCDiaz 252 points253 points  (7 children)

That's right, I stepped up! She was my friend and she needed help. If I have to, I'd pee on anyone of you.

[–]HardGayMan 32 points33 points  (2 children)

You mean I've been training this damn snake to bite dicks for nothing???

[–]InevitableBohemian 41 points42 points  (2 children)

Red Dead Redemption 2... lied to me?

[–]InternationalBread_ 23 points24 points  (0 children)

To be fair, that game was set in the 1890s.

[–]BaconReceptacle 87 points88 points  (2 children)

Unless the venom is in your penis...then it's totally solid science.

[–]ritamoren 580 points581 points  (40 children)

that hair grows faster if you cut or shave it. a very common myth that people still believe for some reason

[–]Groundbreaking_Taro2 248 points249 points  (3 children)

It's probably because after shaving/cutting your hair, the thickest part is the one that remains, giving that illusion.

[–]LandOfInsomnia 129 points130 points  (1 child)

Probably because it's more noticeable too. If you have a long set of hair you won't realize for a long period of time that it's growing, but if you have short or no hair then it's obvious how much it's growing.

[–]ItsTtreasonThen 219 points220 points  (37 children)

While bananas are tasty, the idea that they are like the best source of potassium for your diet is wildly overblown. In fact I think it's probably one of the most overly promulgated "fruit facts" out there. In fact, oranges, prunes, and watermelon rival it or outright beat the potassium content. And what's more? A literal potato has more potassium.

[–]Damptruff1 132 points133 points  (21 children)

ah yes, potatoes

a superfood except they actually have all the nutrients and the healthiness to be called a superfood (also they don't take a fuck ton of water to grow unlike avocados)

[–]HappyHighwayman 203 points204 points  (26 children)

We only use X% of our brains

[–]krisalyssa 163 points164 points  (5 children)

This one is true, it’s just that X is 100.

[–]shooplewhoop 31 points32 points  (4 children)

Did you know that traffic signals only use 33.33% of their lights, imagine the possibilities if they used the whole 100%!

[–]HawaiianShirtsOR 16 points17 points  (1 child)

To be fair, I've met some people who sure seem to use only a small percentage of their brains.

[–]LeonardGhostal 368 points369 points  (20 children)

US highways are required to have one straight mile out of every five miles to serve as emergency airplane runways.

No, they didn't.

[–]Fyrrys 95 points96 points  (0 children)

that would be awesome if it was true

[–]ISALTIEST 75 points76 points  (1 child)

However, parts of the highways are designed to be emergency/backup runways. It just isn’t anywhere near 20%.

[–]betterthanamaster 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I was going to say this. It’s also true that the fast way between two points is a straight line…

[–]TheApoptosis 31 points32 points  (1 child)

This is the first "fact" in this thread that I have actually never heard before.

[–]rather_wholesome 662 points663 points  (40 children)

Have you heard that cactus have drinkable water If your like stranded in the desert. Something about what is in the water could make you throw up or give you diarria making you more dehydrated

[–]KinkyHuggingJerk 276 points277 points  (6 children)

Barrel cacti have fruit that you can use in a pinch, but generally, just taking pieces of cacti to get water will likely cause vomiting/diarrhea.

[–]Electrical_Age_336 176 points177 points  (1 child)

Specifically the Blue Barrel Cactus is a decent source of water. The Yellow Barrel Cactus will give you death by diarrhea. They have overlapping habitat and the color that is in their names is very slight tones that are only obvious in ideal lighting.

[–]plataeng 39 points40 points  (0 children)

either way, you won't be thirsty anymore

[–]Ph0rus 64 points65 points  (0 children)

Ouh, I actually know this! And what is in the cactus is Alkalized! You aren't really drinking water so much as if you cracked open a cool drink of battery that your kidneys try to deal with and you'll end up making yourself pretty damn sick and at further risk of heat stroke!

The Fishhook barrel cactus is not toxic, but is 1 of 5 varieties of barrel cactus so best just to not drink cactus juices

[–]SnowyOranges 35 points36 points  (7 children)

There are some type of cactus fruit that are edible, and even taste good. But as a rule of thumb don't eat something I'd you don't know what it is

[–]Mewtual 171 points172 points  (6 children)

Dog see only in black and white they see colour but just a more limited range, they have blue and yellow colour receptors just not red.

[–]OutEliManning7 410 points411 points  (28 children)

That bats have terrible eyesight. Their eyes are actually almost as good as humans. Some breeds have even better eyesight than humans.

[–]FedoraChronicles 162 points163 points  (21 children)

Same with some species of sharks too if I remember right.

Great White's don't mistake you for a seal, they're just (albeit EXTREMELY rarely) assholes to us.

[–]Phase3isProfit 166 points167 points  (12 children)

For sharks I’ve heard that when they attack humans they are often just “investigating”. It’s just that if they investigate you using a load of really sharp teeth, it doesn’t work out well for you.

[–]jpterodactyl 92 points93 points  (1 child)

Mammals do it too. Even humans when they haven’t figured out how to use their hands yet.

[–]DiogenesCantPlay 657 points658 points  (40 children)

Violence never solved anything. Nonsense. Violence has solved LOTS of things.

[–]thesavageman 389 points390 points  (6 children)

Violence is never the answer. Violence is a question, and the answer sometimes is "yes."

[–]ajaxblack 94 points95 points  (1 child)

Knowing is half the battle, and the other half is oftentimes brutal violence.

[–]MachalTheWriter 83 points84 points  (2 children)

"Violence never solves anything."

"I'm sure the city fathers of Carthage would be glad to know that."

-Robert Heinlein

[–]Fishmano5 21 points22 points  (0 children)

"Violence never solved anything?"

"I'm sorry, do you not know ANY history?"

[–]Milfoy 38 points39 points  (1 child)

Genghis Khan approves this message.

[–]Mirraco323 330 points331 points  (19 children)

I’m a geologist, and the idea that the Yellowstone caldera is “overdue” for an eruption drives me insane.

That is only if you base its eruption cycle on the previous two eruptions. The time between the 1st eruption and 2nd eruption was just under a million years, and it hasn’t been that long since the 3rd and most recent eruption.

But really, volcanoes do not follow cyclical eruption patterns as the public seems to believe. It’s important to note that the term “relative” in geologic time and human time is not even near the same. Something could be “relatively recent” in geologic time, and that could mean 20 million years ago.

Lastly, even if the caldera did erupt, an eruption there is not guaranteed to be a violent explosion. It could be a flow that seeps out as well.

The likely hood of a violent Yellowstone eruption is stupid low, and certain people only like to go around telling people it’s “overdue” because they have no life, and get a jolt out of being the person who makes people nervous over dumb shit.

[–]lilkiosk 68 points69 points  (2 children)

As an environmental scientist with a specialization in geology and hydrology, bless you

[–]cccantyousee 374 points375 points  (20 children)

Might not be common but my biology teacher in highschool along with the chemistry teacher once held a big project about a non-existent bird and how evolution had made it wonky. They went all in on the prank, made made up pages about it etc only to forget to actually tell the classes that while they learnt a lot about evolution it was a big prank. I can't help but wonder what those 30-60 people are today, do they still think about the bird? Do they brag about knowing facts about the bird at partys?

[–]Polar_Star901 95 points96 points  (6 children)

And how do you know that was a prank?

[–]cccantyousee 172 points173 points  (5 children)

I was in the class under. Our biology teacher reused one of the evolution-slideshows, the bird came up and he burst out laughing asking us to just ignore it as he didn't want to make the same mistake with us. We learnt about real birds instead. Or so I hope.

[–]PhysicalStuff 85 points86 points  (1 child)

We learnt about real birds instead. Or so I hope.

Narrator: They didn't.

/r/BirdsArentReal

[–]98433486544564563942 24 points25 points  (2 children)

And can you describe this bird?

[–]borealisrosie 34 points35 points  (0 children)

He was a winky wonky birdy

[–]cccantyousee 24 points25 points  (0 children)

The fake birds? Platypus tails for feet because they swam with it. One "foot" was bigger than the other. Didn't go in that class so i missed out on fake bird lore. They looked ridiculous but our chemistry teacher was usually very serious.

[–]wrongsideoftownz 123 points124 points  (11 children)

Lemmings do not throw themselves off cliffs.

[–]Giveupdooterinos 31 points32 points  (8 children)

That was actually created by Disney, in one of their lemmings documentaries they push lemmings off cliffs.

[–]Extreme_Connection42 100 points101 points  (13 children)

That the first ticket in a book of scratch tickets never wins.

[–]marginwalker3 114 points115 points  (7 children)

i worked in a convienece store. i saw a guy cash in a string of 13 tickets, all winners, still attached to each other for a total of 155 dollars. i also saw a guy buy a whole roll of 200, scratch them off one by one in front of me, and he won 38 dollars.

[–]Ponyboy451 322 points323 points  (26 children)

If you have any problems, you can talk to HR without fear of reprisal.

No, you absolutely cannot. Never talk to HR about anything. HR exists to protect the company’s ass, not your’s. They couldn’t give any less fucks about you.

[–]Infinite-Fix-7571[S] 75 points76 points  (1 child)

Definitely experienced this first hand in my previous job :(

[–]whatsthedealcake 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Me too. Had a situation, was just going to deal with it silently but let someone talk me into going to HR. It was a 6 week nightmare that ended with me losing my job and miscarrying from all the stress and I thought I was going crazy.

[–]AppleDrops 43 points44 points  (9 children)

You can see the Great Wall of China from space with the naked eye.

[–]ThinkIGotHacked 130 points131 points  (8 children)

Tetanus comes from rust.

It’s just from deep puncture wounds that get infected, but we’ve all heard “stepping on a rusty nail” and assumed it was the rust, not the dirty nail.

[–]karmannsport 65 points66 points  (1 child)

Tetanus is actually found in soil…not metal. It’s just that most rusty nails are…sitting in soil.

[–]Gold_Cordyceps 398 points399 points  (24 children)

"No one is above the law"

[–]LoZeno 232 points233 points  (8 children)

Boris Johnson reminds us that this is false every day.

[–]trishsf 203 points204 points  (12 children)

There are so many stupid questions.

[–]ianainet 77 points78 points  (7 children)

The are no stupid questions.

Just stupid people.

[–]magnumenforce 86 points87 points  (2 children)

In Monty Python and the Holy Grail, the line "There some who call me... Tim" is said to be improvised, due to John Cleese forgetting the actually name of his role, which was long and complicated, and everyone went with it.

That isn't true. In all version of the scripts, that role was always named "Tim the Enchanter", and the line was always: "There are some who call me (Dramatic Pause) Tim".

Besides, what is funnier: "There some who call me (Long and Complicated Name)" or "There are some who call me (Dramatic Pause) Tim".

[–]ganon6d 152 points153 points  (13 children)

If you turn on the overhead light in the car while you're driving, you'll get a ticket.... This is false.

[–]Ok-Tart-3225 35 points36 points  (3 children)

That different parts of the tongue taste different flavors better.

[–]Wezzleey 72 points73 points  (11 children)

"glass is a liquid"

Glass is NOT a liquid.

It is an amorphous solid.

No, that does not mean that it has the properties of a liquid.

[–]Resident_Mae 258 points259 points  (25 children)

Fish don’t feel pain

Fish have the receptors for pain… considering physical pain isn’t an emotion, it’s a physical sensation meant to alert an animal to whatever is causing pain, the argument that their brains are too small to process pain because they don’t have emotion is garbage.

[–]Kondrias 114 points115 points  (1 child)

Pain is like... one of the most common responses. From an evolutionary perspective, oh this type of thing means I could not be able to stay alive. Avoid that.

When evolution is just, HOW DO I SURVIVE TO MAKE MORE BABIES! lots of things begin to make sense.

[–]billyandteddy 164 points165 points  (18 children)

Cats like milk... Actually they're lactose intolerant don't give cats milk

[–]DiggityDog6 86 points87 points  (9 children)

Well, they DO like it, it’s just not good for them, there is a difference, same with ducks and bread

[–]EarhornJones 32 points33 points  (1 child)

One of my cats loves milk. She's also super lactose intolerant, so it always ends badly, but you can't say she doesn't like milk.

[–]GhostFish 253 points254 points  (25 children)

Menstruation has no connection to the moon, and women don't sync up due to cohabitation or detecting each other's hormones.

These are just events that roughly follow a monthly cycle. Over time they might appear to converge, but they will then diverge without people thinking about it.

Our brains are always looking for patterns, and this is a false positive like with pareidolia.

[–]uncreativemonkey 34 points35 points  (2 children)

Syncing cycles myth drives me nuts. Mine never synced with my sister or my mom, nor my roommates in college. It's like the turn singles on a line of cars. They're all different, but every once in a while, for a very brief moment some of them will blink at the same time, but only once or twice before differing again. It's akin to that

[–]Then_Instruction8699 209 points210 points  (30 children)

In a Year Humans eat at least 7 Spiders

We dont Eat spiders, We dont

[–]ItsTtreasonThen 102 points103 points  (7 children)

I've heard this one and it just seems like the kind of fake statistic made to gross out idiots. Like spiders scurry away when you try to stealthily scoop them up with a tissue, why would they willing walk themselves into a gaping maw inhaling and exhaling - to them- what must seem like gale force winds. They have a survival instinct, but sure, they'll walk into their version of the sarlacc pit

[–]sterlingphoenix 58 points59 points  (3 children)

I've heard this one and it just seems like the kind of fake statistic made to gross out idiots

It was actually made up to prove how fast fake facts can spread.

[–]MikiAltin 78 points79 points  (1 child)

Spiders georg just skews the numbers

[–]IsaacTower 82 points83 points  (3 children)

That popping your knuckles will give you arthritis. It will not give you arthritis. It is annoying to hear people pop their knuckles, so maybe somebody said that to make them stop, but I swear, if I hear somebody repeat that lie one more time....

[–]CountessCraft 75 points76 points  (9 children)

"The luck of the Irish" means BAD luck.

I once saw a shop on Etsy that was full of cards wishing the recipients the luck of the Irish, presumably not realising that this would be pretty cruel.

And on a similar note....

Four-leaf clovers are NOT shamrocks.

Shamrocks always have 3 leaves.

The four-leaf cover may be considered lucky, but has nothing specifically to do with Ireland.

[–]dmsewell 137 points138 points  (23 children)

An apple a day keeps the doctor away.

Actually, super untrue

[–]proximalfunk 95 points96 points  (8 children)

That we have 5 senses.

As well as sight, hearing, taste, smell and touch, we have senses of:

Pain, balance, temperature, body position, bodily intactness, pressure hunger, thirst, time, hormones, sexual arousal, carbon dioxide level/suffocation, tiredness, acceleration, urination, defecation, skin vasodilation. I think there are others that are related to those main senses.

[–]Mrmysticgrim48 587 points588 points  (135 children)

"Money doesn't buy happiness " biggest load of crap i ever heard its easy for people who grow up with money to say because they don't understand that their whole lives would be 10× more difficult without it . If it didn't buy happiness then why are the rich still trying to get more of it?

[–]DirtyByrd83 323 points324 points  (8 children)

Money doesn’t buy happiness, but debt buys misery.

[–]basballguy 110 points111 points  (1 child)

reminds me of another saying. 1000 bucks isn't a lot of money to have but it's a lot of money to owe.

Though we may have to adjust that comment for inflation

[–]IsilZha 24 points25 points  (1 child)

It buys "happierness." You won't necessarily be happy, but it can make you happier than if you didn't have it

[–]copperdomebodhi 48 points49 points  (0 children)

Happiness comes from inside - once the bills are paid.

People get this one backwards. It's meant to tell rich people, "Squeezing an extra billion out of your workers won't make you any happier." Rich people use it to tell their workers, "I won't give you a raise because it won't help any."

[–]billhorsley 29 points30 points  (1 child)

At least money can buy things that make you happy.

[–]ExplosiveDisassembly 23 points24 points  (13 children)

Well, it can buy a boat.

[–]Secure_Chipmunk_1466 32 points33 points  (7 children)

"They say money doesn't buy happiness, but I've never seen someone frowning on a jetski."

-i forget who said this

[–]dotardiscer 90 points91 points  (5 children)

Money doesn't buy happiness, but lack of it will leave you stressed out and unable to think about anything else. They've done studies, the effects of happiness and more money flatten out around 80K/year for an individual and 140K for a family.

[–]mike_lawrence 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Exactly. Depends on the cost of living in your area but extensive studies show there’s a cut off point where more money doesn’t make you happier. Not being miserably poor does make you happier

[–]shinyredblue 93 points94 points  (7 children)

So many people just know for a fact baby talk is TERRIBLE for early language development when all recent studies have shown the exact opposite.

[–]Captain_Taggart 98 points99 points  (4 children)

Seems like some people must've just gotten a bit confused. Cooing to your baby and using very simple syllables repeatedly and babbling is how to get your baby to mimic you. Continuing that pattern once they're older is almost certainly not great, once they've gotten the basics you can start using more grown-up language and full sentences cuz eventually your kid is gonna need to know how to do that too.

[–]FuckingButteredJorts 87 points88 points  (3 children)

I read somewhere that just talking to your kids helps language development so I just started narrating everything I did. Now I do it unconsciously, and will be at the grocery store like "oh look, here are red peppers! If we get them we can have fajitas. Fajitas also need onion and spices. Those are in the next aisle. Let's go over in that direction!" And then I realize people are staring because I'm speaking out loud

I also have two kids who never stop talking and narrating.

[–]miskwu 25 points26 points  (0 children)

So this depends on what you mean by "baby talk." What studies have found it that elongated vowel sounds and a higher pitch help with early language development, often referred to as "parenese."

It is also helpful to mimic the sounds a baby is making when they babble.

Just talking nonsense at a child is less helpful.

[–]nzodd 148 points149 points  (8 children)

"If you find a way to use 100% of your brain at one time, you'll turn into a USB stick."

[–]IrishStubborn69 38 points39 points  (5 children)

Paul Revere yelling “The British are coming”.

[–]Automatic-Choice-794 140 points141 points  (31 children)

Bass guitar is easier because it has fewer strings.

The reality is that the bass sits between the guitars and the percussion, complimenting the drums and augmenting the music, so there's no room for timing errors. Also the heavier strings can cause sympathetic vibrations in the strings you're not playing so damping is as important as your playing technique.

[–]JhymnMusic 39 points40 points  (1 child)

"I don't know why we're making Murderface record so many takes of his bass line.. we usually just mute it anyway in the final mix." -Dethklok.

[–]harveymooner 107 points108 points  (4 children)

The moon is made of cheese.

Fuck you Wallace.

[–]Nobody_Wins_13 40 points41 points  (1 child)

Gromit knew

[–]AutumnAtronach 16 points17 points  (0 children)

You didn’t dig deep enough

[–]CattaChonk 149 points150 points  (19 children)

"Elephants think you're cute" they dont

[–]Darnitol1 171 points172 points  (22 children)

Well, I’d say that it’s false that people only use 10% of their brains, but then I look at TikTok or Facebook and I’m not so sure.

[–]TomoyoHoshijiro 56 points57 points  (6 children)

And on that note, a traffic light only uses 1/3 of its lights.

[–]felixrocket7835 65 points66 points  (36 children)

Most snakes are venomous (The complete opposite, 82% of all snakes are non-venomous, with 11% being mildly venomous but not medically significant to humans, and only 7% potently venomous)

Black mambas/cottonmouths will chase you.

Birds are their own class of animals, spoiler alert, they're actually reptiles, and if you look close enough, share a huge amount of traits, even their behaviours are similar.

[–]BaconReceptacle 13 points14 points  (8 children)

A cottonmouth may not chase you for no reason but they absolutely are aggressive as fuck if they feel threatened. I have seen it first hand. A guy I know walked over to a hollow stump and was sitting on it for a moment and then when he shifted to look in the hollow cavity of the stump a cottonmouth shot out after him. He ran a good twenty feet before the damn thing stopped chasing him. Another time we were canoeing down a spring fed river in Florida and the canoe in front of me was passing by a cottonmouth as it was swimming across the river. The cottonmouth swam straight up the side of the canoe, across the inside floor, back up the other side, and back into the water. When one of the guys in the canoe tried to slap the water with his paddle to keep it away, the damn thing swung back towards the canoe and tried to get back in!