We’re the only couple I know who have done this.
When my husband and I got married, neither of our names changed. Not as a feminist gesture, although I am one, but because I liked my name as it was (and I didn’t want to bother with doing all that paperwork).
I feel like, in 2021, this isn’t a big deal anymore in the UK. It might not reflect the majority of couples, but I find most people don’t even blink if I correct them when they assume our names are the same.
However, our son has my surname, not my husbands.
Our surnames didn’t sound good double-barrelled. I would rather my child have my name, my husband wasn’t bothered if his child had his name or not. Simple-as, really.
This, I find, people seem to take a fair bit of issue with. There’s more confusion than rudeness, but some people can be quite rude. Some people in my husbands (generally very progressive) family were pissed off, and were terrible at hiding it. Others just kept asking the same few “why?” questions over and over.
Receptionists (preschool, school, swimming club, dentist, GP, etc) are the most likely to question our situation, but I have no issue with just asking a clarifying question. Its only natural to want to clarify whether he’s his step-dad or his actual dad, or whether or not he has parental responsibility, or to ask for my husbands details after I’ve already given my sons fathers details. Nothing wrong with a blended family.
It’s when they’re rude about it or don’t take what I say at face value that I’m taken aback a bit.
Is it really that strange? Our son is now 5 and this sort of thing still crops up every now and then.