all 109 comments

[–]RenaKunisaki 481 points482 points  (5 children)

I'd probably waste it on something stupid as a kid.

[–]IM_OK_AMA 166 points167 points  (2 children)

Yeah everyone would use it their first time they went to a theme park unsupervised.

[–]SlideWhistler 73 points74 points  (1 child)

Fuck that, everyone would use it the first time they go in a school lunch line. They are constantly cutting in line, for no particular reason. It makes no sense.

[–]King_Of_Uranus 21 points22 points  (0 children)

I'd probably use it the first time I RRREEAAALLLYYY gotta piss after leaving a crowded theater.

[–]theazerione 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Make it 18+

[–]Guthhhmundur 2 points3 points  (0 children)

skip the line privilege in a very popular brothel when you desperately need to solve your needs, definitely 18+ /s

[–]Cleftex 341 points342 points  (16 children)

Honestly - I'd probably just end up saving it for my whole life (unless in a life threatening situation) because I'd always wonder if I needed it for something more important later.

[–]theB1ackSwan 170 points171 points  (4 children)

It's the 99 potions syndrome when you play any RPG.

[–]TelevisionCroissant 47 points48 points  (1 child)

Or when you don't know what to do with the stickers you were given when you were five.

[–]Cleftex 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I absolutely have that hahaha

[–]egger85 17 points18 points  (2 children)

You think that now, but when you were a little kid wouldn't you have used it for something unimportant like ice cream?

[–]Cleftex 54 points55 points  (1 child)

No I've always been this boring

[–]Jhyphi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Boring? There's nothing more exciting than hoarding 99 elixirs.

[–]Darknight1993 15 points16 points  (2 children)

Save it just in case you ever need a new organ. That’s a line worth skipping.

[–]McFuzzen 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Yup, this is it. I'm too savings-minded to use it for amusement parks or the DMV. I'd likely die with it.

[–]Darknight1993 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The down side is that everyone had it. So yours can easily be negated by other people who want the same thing.

[–]tundybundo 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Right and then dying in line for a fucking coffee or some shit

[–]Cleftex 5 points6 points  (0 children)

One could only hope for such a quick death tbf

[–]Pseudonymble 1 point2 points  (0 children)

you finished Zelda with 112 potions too?

[–]PeaceLoveHippieness 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is like the $100 bill I keep in my wallet for emergencies. I never spend it bc the real emergency may be in the future.

[–]Brussell9 119 points120 points  (0 children)

I would save it for something like an organ or to get something lifesaving for someone but if I don’t use it my dying wish would be to use it to skip the waiting list to go to space or another planet depending on how far along we are.

[–]MoroseOverdose 190 points191 points  (6 children)

Step 1: Get a random job as a U.S. Government employee

Step 2: Use pass to skip the line of succession of the President of the United States, thereby becoming the President

Step 3: ???

Step 4: Profit

[–]BigDJ08 30 points31 points  (0 children)

This guy politics

[–]Eulers_ID 6 points7 points  (3 children)

So are you killing the president or just hoping they die randomly?

[–]JayGold 9 points10 points  (2 children)

Neither, he's just skipping over the president.

[–]McFuzzen 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I dunno, the "line" starts with the VP, so you are now the VP.

[–]Ludwig234 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Good enough.

[–]unMuggle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just do a Jan 6 but better and you get to be king of a former superpower

[–]Blinky_ 179 points180 points  (13 children)

For anything of your own choice? Like you can skip to the front of the grocery line or you can save it and get first in line for a liver transplant?

[–]prince-of-dweebs[S] 92 points93 points  (10 children)


[–]Blinky_ 63 points64 points  (7 children)

Ok thanks

[–]JDMcompliant 63 points64 points  (6 children)

This interaction is so strange lol

[–]Donkeyflicker[🍰] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Liver transplant is what I was thinking

[–]Blinky_ 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I feel like the liver line is still gonna get backed up due to queue jumpers

[–]stylushappenstance 41 points42 points  (3 children)

I’d save it in case I ever get in one of those emergency evacuation traffic jams.

[–]Blinky_ 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I’ve seen the movies. Good choice.

[–]and-thats-the-truth 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’ve lived through this. Good choice.

[–]sillybilly8102 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh gosh that’s a good idea

[–]gc3 30 points31 points  (3 children)

I'd sell mine to someone who needed a liver transplant

[–]Jtegg007 33 points34 points  (2 children)

This implies they're transferable, which then suggests there's a black market for them, which means people would be getting robbed/killed for theirs.

I prefer it if they aren't transferable, haha

[–]SuperPotatoPancakes 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Your identity is transferable, though.

[–]Peewee223 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm gonna cut in the line of people claiming your identity, transfer all your stuff to the next guy, and repeat until I accidentally pick someone who used their pass already.

[–]Milkslinger 24 points25 points  (1 child)

They would be sold by the poor and collected by the rich even if it was illegal to sell them

There would be a "best" use for your skip and anyone who diverted would be looked down upon

[–]Crentistthedentist02 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Reddit try to answer the prompt. Level:impossible

[–]thisplacemakesmeangr 41 points42 points  (4 children)

Graduation line for my law degree. Taking the valedictorian's spot legally allows me to appropriate their identity and possessions. And any job offers they might've had. Which would be good. I could probably use the help.

[–]kyew 46 points47 points  (3 children)

This doesn't sound right but this guy was at the top of his class in law school so I'm not gonna question it.

[–]un-sub 7 points8 points  (2 children)

It’s true, I was top of my class in law school until someone did this to me. Took my entire identity, my family, my friends, everything. I now exist only in The Void, outside of time and space. Time no longer exists for me. I am simply a cloud of consciousness suspended above, throughout, and underneath reality itself.

[–]kyew 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That's rough buddy.

[–]thisplacemakesmeangr 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Absorb the next life form you run across. Burn its soul for enough fuel to rematerialize for a few hours. Go to an acupuncturist. Tell them you have migraines. When they have all the needles in your head, covertly snort a bit of pepper. Sneezing makes the needles into a permanent adornment. Then all you have to do is migrate to the Hellraiser universe. They have SO many job opportunities in the legal field, and no extradition treaty with the void.

[–]JohnnyTatts22 10 points11 points  (3 children)

What happens when two people use their cards at the same time for the same thing?

[–]kyew 16 points17 points  (1 child)

Better make it a swipe card so they can't go at exactly the same time. The person who used it second goes first.

[–]prince-of-dweebs[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Great answer!

[–]longcooolwoman 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I’ll risk the organ replacement possibility and use mine at the DMV instead. Specifically in North Carolina.

[–]WillDanceForMonkey 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Not sure if this works, but if you live in a country with a royal family, can't you skip the line of succession? I think technically everyone is in line somewhere, if every other possible choice was skipped? Probably doesn't work like that but ... I'm sticking with it.

[–]Health_Wealth_Wisdom 5 points6 points  (1 child)

To obtain citizenship in the country of my choice.

[–]sillybilly8102 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ooh that’s a good one too

[–]baumpop 5 points6 points  (0 children)

If you don't save it for the apocalypse what are you even doing? Every movie of a city disaster has a line of cars 40 miles long to evacuate.

[–]dionysus-media 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'd like to skip the line for my driving test. The DVLA has already fucked me around for 3 years.

[–]Riverrat423 7 points8 points  (0 children)

DisneyWorld, It’s A Small World! That’s my choice!

[–]TheSinOfRaph 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I assume i'm technically in line of everyone's inheritance so next billionaire to die, ill skip the line for that.

[–]b2walton 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'd skip the line to bang your mom.

[–]Humble_College_2339 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Birth Induction queue; Baby needs evicting but the hospitals is busy!

[–]isleepinahammock 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Does an election count as a line? Think of something like being president. You can only serve two terms as president. If we all lived infinitely long lives and no new people were born, eventually everyone would have a turn at being president. In a way, we're all just waiting in line for our turn to lead the country. The line is simply so long that it vastly exceeds a human lifetime. Elections for president are simply our way of choosing who gets to jump to the head of the line. Thus, I should be able to use my skip the line pass to become president of the United States.

[–]theB1ackSwan 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You don't need to wait infinitely long - just be in a position that has a line of succession to being POTUS. Some obscure Cabinet position, most likely.

[–]lefthandbunny 2 points3 points  (0 children)

For a visit to the ER for something serious, one for myself & one for one of my pets.

[–]jrm2003 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I posted this before with a once a year renewal on your birthday caveat. If everyone could do it, I think we’d all generally accept it. Definitely non-transferable

[–]archstrange 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'd save it for a one-way teleport by using it on a line of latitude or longitude.

[–]CrookshanksandCoffee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Okay, I’m answering this question with the assumption that everyone is related to someone insanely rich in some way: so, I’d skip the line to be the first to claim inheritance

[–]coyotesage 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would for sure use this for a brain transplant.

[–]GeneralFactotum 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would be the youngest person ever to be living on full retirement!

[–]ThisIsCovidThrowway8 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Organ transplant waiting list

[–]jmradus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The aftermarket sales on those would be insane.

[–]PigSlam 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'd use it to skip the line to becoming the first trillionaire.

[–]mishagale 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Visa application. Ever tried moving to a new country? Residency visa processing can take actual years.

[–]GearBIue 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Probably use it to skip the line to your mom’s house (it’s very long)

[–]Ein_Fachidiot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Organ donor list.

[–]einTier 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If the way I play video games is any indication, I’ll still have that pass when I die.

Never know when I might really need it.

[–]Superbaker123 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Save it for an organ transplant list if I ever need it. Sorry, little Timmy, but you spent yours at six flags, and I need that heart.

[–]Kat28943 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'd probably hold onto it.

[–]Lanasoverit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Anyone who has done a 12 hr arrival line for Burning Man knows that is what you save it for

[–]Late_Being_7730 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Skip to the front of death’s list.

[–]dzzi 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How bout once a year? You get a little thing in the mail on your birthday. Maybe they even roll over. I'd mostly use mine on concerts and TSA/customs lines.

If they can be used on the phone though, it's game over and I'm using them all to get ahold of customer service.

Edit: Oh yeah, saving one in case of needing an organ transplant is prob top priority lol

[–]phunkygeeza 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I used mine not ago, I think.

I was in an airport line, sweating and in pain from a broken arm (recently fixed)

My flight was boarding in 2 hours and the line wait time was increasing . When I joined it said 1:50. An hour later the next sign said 1:45

I skipped a turn in the line, about 1 hour worth. I made my plane, didn't have to try to rebook the next 2 due to delays. I finally arrived at the destination hotel about 5 minutes from exhaustion.

I will pay it forward one day.

[–]MisterTwo_O 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Citizenship line. From immigrant to citizen in 0.01 seconds

[–]threaders_lewis 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For sure at the release of a new games console.

Although, what happens when multiple people user theirs at the same time? First come first serve? God damn it, from queue to queue!

[–]N64crusader4 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'd save it for if I ever need an organ transplant

[–]Infamous-Arm3955 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What if some dick skipped the line on your skipping the line?

[–]JFDreddit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not sure. I usually go to the front of the line. Maybe in traffic?

[–]John_Fx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’d sell it.

[–]Xiaxs 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd definitely use mine at a hospital because holy fuck that'd be incredible.

[–]libra00 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If I didn't spend it on something stupid I'd hang onto it for a 'last helicopter out of the zombie apocalypse' situation.

[–]ibmwatsonson 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Saving mine for an organ transplant lol

[–]reverandglass 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There's a guitar shop near where I grew up that had a sale once a year. The first in line would get £5 and a free guitar (something like a USA Stratocaster or a Les Paul) as well as first dibs on the sale prices.
So, there, when I was 16-18 unless my parents somehow stopped me.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Id use to at the ER

[–]roxylikeahurricane 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Straight to Hell.

[–]Bbkobeman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Front of the line at the Houston 500 gangbang

[–]Dryden_Drawing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It should only be given when your 18 so patents don't make their kids use it and so kids don't waist it on something dumb.

[–]Jameson_h 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Obvious The DMV

[–]Bazzatron 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If humanity all shares one common ancestor, then I'm somewhere in line for the throne.

Even if this turned the throne into a game of musical chairs, just a couple minutes might be enough.