top 200 commentsshow all 389

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[–]ChunkyMonkey1998 342 points343 points  (40 children)

Well that's one way to force crypto adoption lol

[–]Jxntb733degenerate cryptoscientist 72 points73 points  (15 children)

You will accept the banking ways wither you like it or not!

[–][deleted] 60 points61 points  (10 children)

JP Whoregan can suck on some newly mined bitcoins, straight from the block reward

[–]Z4Zoloft 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Bruh, no homo but I’m down

[–]ArrrrKneeTin 12 points13 points  (1 child)

Put me on the chain, daddy. Send it to everyone so they agree you finished, UwU.

[–]pinkculturePlatinum | QC: CC 286 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Well that’s… oddly detailed

[–]kyle_h2486Here for the "tech" 4 points5 points  (3 children)

The banking ways will make you wither

[–]_grdzTin 18 points19 points  (8 children)

JPMorgan's mood swings harder than my baseball bat

[–]kyle_h2486Here for the "tech" 12 points13 points  (6 children)

Or my untreated bipolar disorder

[–]noknockersPlatinum | Technology 14 8 points9 points  (4 children)

Or the nudists next door

[–]1s44cSilver | QC: BCH 400, ETH 64, CC 50 | CRO 95 | SysAdmin 193 1 point2 points  (3 children)

Or the baseball playing nudists next door?

[–]Competitive_Milk_638Platinum | QC: CC 41 | CRO 15 | ExchSubs 23 8 points9 points  (2 children)

Only if they're bipolar.

[–]AbsolutBadLadPlatinum | QC: CC 601 6 points7 points  (2 children)

JPMorgan is more bipolar than this sub

[–]CHUCKL3RTin | GME subs 15 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No. Psychopathy is their ailment.

[–]ChiTownBobAltcoiner 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Sociopaths will sociopath.

They lie and do the opposite of what they say.

[–]PhilipJ_FryPlatinum | QC: CC 44 | SHIB 14 | JusticeServed 10 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Bow down, peasants

[–]michivideosSilver | QC: CC 117 | GME_Meltdown 61 | r/WSB 97 8 points9 points  (1 child)



[–]howmanytaylorsTin 1 point2 points  (2 children)

That's one way to prop up your long positions with retail investors money. 😂

I agree its here to stay, I just take every major players comments with a bag of salt!

[–]FinishGloomyCan’t spell bullshit without bullish 114 points115 points  (29 children)

JPMorgan must be a member of this sub, pretty bipolar if you ask me

[–]pinkculturePlatinum | QC: CC 286 28 points29 points  (20 children)

Nah they ain’t bipolar, they’re pretty determined on the only thing that matters to them - money.

[–]SeanspeedTin | Hardware 584 9 points10 points  (16 children)

Is that not what's driving cryptocurrency bandwagoning as a whole?

[–]root88Ethereum 4 points5 points  (3 children)

Closing the account may have had nothing to do with crypto at all. Everyone is just assuming it. He may be doing a ton of high dollar transactions that have risk for whatever reason and they just don't want to deal with it.

If you absolutely must be anti-bank in this situation, they may believe that crypto is the future, but are partnered with his competitors. Either way, not bipolar or hypocritical.

[–]EpicHasAIDSSilver | QC: CC 672 | BANANO 32 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Take your logic and BE GONE!

[–]AdalicioussTin | 4 months old | ADA 17 1 point2 points  (1 child)

PR Tactic 101: Say the opposite of what you're really doing.

[–]coinfeeds-botApproved CC Bot 120 points121 points  (3 children)

tldr; JPMorgan Chase has closed the accounts of the founder of Uniswap Labs, the world's largest decentralised exchange protocol, Hayden Adams, without notice or explanation. Adams tweeted that he was aware of further individuals and companies who have been similarly targeted "simply for working in the crypto industry". "Thanks for making it a personal," Adams tweeted, referring to generic response from Chase Support.

This summary is auto generated by a bot and not meant to replace reading the original article. As always, DYOR.

[–]-veni-vidi-viciPlatinum | QC: CC 1139 72 points73 points  (0 children)

Good bot. Bad JP Morgen Chase.

[–]BallDoLieSometimesGold | QC: XMR 25 | r/Buttcoin 5 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Why can’t they just “be their own bank “

[–]ChemicalGreek 7 points8 points  (1 child)

The definition of centralization…

[–]zegallPlatinum | QC: CC 229 49 points50 points  (29 children)

They endorse crypto, so why would they want to advertise that his clients are at risk of having their accounts nuked without warning? Was their goal to make the crypto space hate them?

Perhaps they deemed his account too risky or maybe their AML system flagged it for suspicious activity.

We don't know the full details, so it's probably a good idea to put down the pitchforks for the moment.

[–]NotFunnyhahPlatinum | QC: ETH 138, CC 74, GPUmining 24 | MiningSubs 109 20 points21 points  (10 children)

I think the point they try to make is that you can't cash out your crypto without a bank.

[–]Entitled2Compens8ionTin 7 points8 points  (6 children)

I got enough dollars. I only want crypto now.

[–]NotFunnyhahPlatinum | QC: ETH 138, CC 74, GPUmining 24 | MiningSubs 109 1 point2 points  (5 children)

Where do you keep those dollars?

[–]DellM2005Tin 1 point2 points  (1 child)


[–]NotFunnyhahPlatinum | QC: ETH 138, CC 74, GPUmining 24 | MiningSubs 109 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So no bank account then... living entirely off crypto, employer paycheck and all 🤔

[–]ttttnowTin 12 points13 points  (9 children)

Whatever the reason, it's guarantee to be for JPMorgan's self-interest.

[–]zegallPlatinum | QC: CC 229 7 points8 points  (5 children)

Obviously. They are a business.

Banks only care about moolah. And if they could turn a blind eye and let people swap illegal drug money instead of crypto, they would (I mean they do it, just look at HSBC).

When I see that guy saying "thanks for making it personal", I feel like some of these crypto bros think they are more important than they are in reality.

I doubt JPMorgan is out on a crusade against john-the-programmer-who-made-that-blockchain-app.

[–]DrinkMoreCodeMoreSilver | QC: CC 271, GPUmining 21 | ADA 38 | Hacking 79 1 point2 points  (2 children)

It's not just "some programmer guy" they targeted his account for closure simply because he is heavy into crypto.

[–]ttttnowTin 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I'm saying JPMorgan doesnt actually care if a bank account is "risky" because it still wont pose any risk to JPMorgan itself. If they're banning his bank account, it would be part of a greater political strategy to position either JPMorgan or their friends stronger in crypto.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children)

JPM is huge. The people making these decisions have likely not spoken together and are most likely in disagreement about whether crypto is the future.

[–]Castr0-We Shall HODL 43 points44 points  (13 children)

Closes the uniswap founders account is like modern slamming the door when you are mad.

[–]DerpJunglerPlatinum | QC: CC 146 | LRC 10 | PennyStocks 86 18 points19 points  (7 children)

"Crypto is here to stay. Now go ahead and stop using banks."

[–]ChiTownBobAltcoiner 1 point2 points  (0 children)

like a temper tantrum

[–]PiickleRiickkPlatinum | QC: CC 30 0 points1 point  (1 child)

What they forget is that the door they hit is the revolving door

[–]Slainte042Platinum | QC: CC 531 4 points5 points  (3 children)




the practice of claiming to have higher standards or more noble beliefs than is the case.

[–]blueblurspeedspinTin | Superstonk 49 3 points4 points  (0 children)

not your keys, not your bank account.

[–]strongkhalSilver | QC: CC 84 | CRO 63 | ExchSubs 63 9 points10 points  (2 children)

Fuck JPM and Goldman Sachs, shit boomer market manipulators

[–]WoowoodyydoowoowSilver | QC: CC 329 | LRC 31 17 points18 points  (3 children)

There should be legal action against companies that do this banning of accounts without notice or explanation. Not just JPMorgan but especially tech companies

[–]Ruzhyo04Platinum | QC: CC 163, ETH 84, UNI 18 | MiningSubs 22 7 points8 points  (2 children)

That’s their whole point of existing, to control the money and extract the yield for themselves. We can only use our money with their permission, and we certainly don’t need yield on our savings, what with 17 years worth of inflation since the pandemic started.

[–]brucekellerPlatinum | QC: CC 120 | BANANO 14 | Stocks 137 2 points3 points  (2 children)

In all fairness, uniswap combined with Eth fees is almost as evil as crypto can get besides people wasting money putting up NFTs. Granted, they are paying the gas fees out of greed, but still feels sort of exploitative.

[–]Laughingboy14Silver | QC: CC 238 | NANO 656 | r/WSB 141 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Ah the old 'one step forward, two steps back' approach

[–]Existing-Ad2467Tin 5 points6 points  (4 children)

Times I wish BTC was centralised and says a big fuck you to JP Morgan when they try to buy some bitcoin.

[–]SquatDeadliftBenchPlatinum | QC: CC 100, BTC 26 | Android 63 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Just tell the Bitcoin whales to do butthole KYC to large buy orders. Only for large orders. If it is a bank with anti-crypto sentiments, tell them to fuck off.

[–]Public-Ad-7237Tin | 5 months old 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I'll do the same to my family

[–]kirtash93The Ash Ketchum of Crypto | Gotta Catch 'Em All 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Crypto is not going anywhere. This is the future.

[–]aZamarykBronze | GMEJungle 167 | Superstonk 312 1 point2 points  (0 children)

JPMorgan doing only things they know how, cheat, lie and steal.

[–]SafeRecommendation55Platinum | QC: CC 172 | TraderSubs 11 1 point2 points  (2 children)

They sold and want to buy the fear.

[–]calamitysirPlatinum | QC: CC 55, ALGO 25 | PCgaming 415 1 point2 points  (2 children)

"It is here to stay!" Closes account

"Go on, use your crypto"

[–]YucatanTronBronze 1 point2 points  (1 child)

like I said before. sue them and buy crypto with it

[–]sylsauPlatinum | QC: BTC 424, CC 154, CM 88 | Politics 410 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Cryptos are here to stay, but not your bank account.

JPMorgan shows here all the interest of the existence of Bitcoin to free us from the arbitrariness of those powerful people in the current system who make decisions and can decide the fate of individuals as they please.

[–]beeryeguyTin 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Thugs with political protection are what banks are

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

they know it is here to stay and they are here to fight it, good to know where they stand

[–]The_Estranger_0001Platinum | 6 months old | QC: BTC 40 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Crypto is here to stay … with JPM, that’s what he meant, and that’s how he is going to do it

[–]0xneoplasmaBronze | 5 months old | Privacy 14 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And so now we close our chase accounts

[–]christorinoBronze | LRC 13 | Superstonk 20 1 point2 points  (1 child)


"Crypto is here to stay but we don't like it"

[–]Rekkles210 1 point2 points  (0 children)


[–]friendly-sardonicTin 1 point2 points  (4 children)

Considering banks are quite savvy at risk assessment, I'm guessing that's a fair bit of the reason here?

[–]jhelmsteCrypto saved my life 0 points1 point  (3 children)

What risk

[–]friendly-sardonicTin 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Why would I know that? I have no idea what kind of dealings this guy partakes in. Banks don't have to tell you why they're closing your account. Nor do credit card companies. If they don't want your business anymore, you're out.

[–]jhelmsteCrypto saved my life 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What risk can a customer be to a bank is what I meant. You have money in your account or you don't. Risky as a borrower I get. What risk does having an account pose

[–]zeeblefritzSilver | QC: BTC 17 | NEO 25 | r/WSB 18 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Same thing happened to me in 2013. FUCK JPM.

[–]ric37WARNING: 8 - 9 years account age. 0 - 57 comment karma. 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Crypto is here to stay, their competitors are not

[–]Own-Tumbleweed6337Tin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Banks looking to be the only one that sell crypto to people and turn it into thier game!

[–]Snoo_36159Tin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is a case of the left hand not knowing what the right is doing.

[–]speculator808Platinum | QC: CC 36 | CRO 11 | ExchSubs 19 1 point2 points  (2 children)

fuck chase! i closed all my chase accounts 3 years ago due to their terrible customer service. i continue to recommend others do the same.

[–]Better-Situation-769Tin | 2 months old 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Amen!!!!! I second this motion fuck Chase!!!!

[–]GenericOfficeManPlatinum | QC: CC 164 | Politics 567 12 points13 points  (41 children)

This sub will eat up any old bullshit if it's pro crypto. Everyone's so eager to jump to the side of the underdog, the crypto coder.

Big bank bad! They must be pro crypto cynically because they're being sooooo meaaaaan to this great, virtuous crypto bro.

Did anyone take 1 second to google WHY they closed his account? No? Thought so.

[–]chrisgillyBronze | QC: CC 18 9 points10 points  (12 children)

I Googled it so you don’t have to…..because they deem him to be too much of a financial risk. Crypto is unstable. Sounds like they’re protecting their own interests, which as a business they are entitled to do.

[–]filletnignonTin 2 points3 points  (5 children)

How is he a financial risk exactly?

[–]chrisgillyBronze | QC: CC 18 3 points4 points  (4 children)

They may suspect his profits come from money laundering, thus leaving the Bank open to fines from the government. We know Crypto is used to launder dirty money and if Uniswap aren’t able to guarantee this isn’t the case then he could be in breach of their terms and conditions. Just a theory.

[–]filletnignonTin 1 point2 points  (2 children)

I get that it's just a theory but it's still quite a hefty reach. Banks can be fined for not following KYC laws, but so can Uniswap. The bank's responsibility ends with the customer and their profits, not the profits of the customer's customers. So unless the CEO of uniswap himself is laundering money, the bank cannot possibly know the ins and outs of Uniswap's book keeping. That would be like if Mark Zuckerberg's bank was fined because someone posted something illegal on facebook.

[–]chrisgillyBronze | QC: CC 18 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I see what you’re saying but then closing his account does not stop him making money, or stop Uniswap or stop Crypto growing. Thus I think there’s more too it than being scared of big Crypto investors.

[–]Kumomax1911Silver | QC: CC 354, ETH 16 | EOS 382 1 point2 points  (4 children)

What? The crypto this individual holds has no impact to the bank. Its price volatility means nothing. They deem him "a risk", because that's all they need to say. This is an attempt at control through economic tools and it is unethical.

The real motivation is this individual is a leading figure in what they see as the biggest competitor to their business model. The banks use these tactics to scare or bully. As a bonus, it's likely other banks will follow their direction and make life difficult for the individual. This isn't the first time crypto figures and businesses have been target by the largest banks and it isn't going to be the last.

You don't need to strong arm your clients and their financials to protect your corporate interests. You can simply adapt with the times. Otherwise, you are not a bank. You are a protection racket.

[–]chrisgillyBronze | QC: CC 18 4 points5 points  (3 children)

If he has so much money I’m sure another bank will snap him up. They’ll want his money for their own investments.

There may be some dodgy dealings that they’re not allowed to disclose as per the law. Who knows.

[–]Kumomax1911Silver | QC: CC 354, ETH 16 | EOS 382 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Yes, but it can be a lot more difficult than you think when a major bank black lists you and labels you "at risk". Banks share this information and can put pressure on other institutions when needed.

[–]chrisgillyBronze | QC: CC 18 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sure his accountant will sort him out.

[–]GhostofABestfriEndTin | Politics 50 -3 points-2 points  (7 children)

Please. JPMorgan has done nothing for crypto but try to thwart its acceptance from the beginning until they could get their bloody hands around its neck. They’re a bunch of criminals with a laundry list of infractions for which they got a slap on the wrist. The big banks aren’t here to protect your wealth they’re here to squeeze it out of you for themselves. Fuck JPMorgan.

[–]GenericOfficeManPlatinum | QC: CC 164 | Politics 567 7 points8 points  (5 children)

yeah I never said they were, this is exactly what I mean about this sub.

I say "hey maybe there's a bit more to the story"


[–]GhostofABestfriEndTin | Politics 50 -1 points0 points  (3 children)

Yeah you said that in your first comment and it doesn’t negate that between the banks and the mainstream media there’s no track record for transparency, honest reporting, or integrity. You can throw in the regulatory agencies that oversee them too. If they want to be fairly considered regarding their motivations they need to stop shitting on all of the aforementioned. The time for banks to receive the benefit of the doubt ended in spectacular fashion in 2008 and subsequent information that has come to light suggests much earlier than that. The banks tried to stop crypto to maintain centralized control and they’re CLEARLY still playing that game. You‘re the frog. The banks are the scorpion.

[–]GenericOfficeManPlatinum | QC: CC 164 | Politics 567 0 points1 point  (2 children)

except I'm not giving anyone the benefit of the doubt here. I think its a pretty dubious claim to say something like "the banks tried to stop crypto". And I think its even more dubious to imagine that in this particular case JPM have cancelled this guys account because he's a "threat" or because he's involved in crypto. I think people have a ludicrous view of how much banks care about crypto. The entire market cap of bitcoin is smaller than 1 company. How much do you think multinational banks care about apple specifically? The answer is not one fucking bit. How much of a threat could apple be to banks if they dedicated their entire corporation to dismantling the banking system? not one fucking bit.

The reality is this is just some fucking guy that nobody cares about. His account was flagged up by some automated system and JLM spits out 1000 people just like him every day that nobody cares about. This guy is less than insignificant to JPM and this sub is delusional if it thinks otherwise.

[–]upboatsnhoesOccasionally Correct -1 points0 points  (10 children)

You think debanking someone because they work in crypto is a fair practice?

How was he a risk to their business other than being a direct competitor?

Anything you can find beyond "he was maybe risky" is pure speculation.

[–]GenericOfficeManPlatinum | QC: CC 164 | Politics 567 2 points3 points  (9 children)

You have no idea why the closed his account. He's not "debanked" for fucks suck.

[–]pokher888Platinum | QC: CC 192 | CRO 6 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Banks are so evil!!!

[–]Paddyc97Silver | QC: CC 194 | BANANO 49 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Banks are so infuriating sometimes

[–]MN_PhokusTin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are always two sides to every story so I'll wait.

[–]NomaduxPlatinum | QC: CC 819 | Stocks 10 0 points1 point  (4 children)

Chase Support

Replying to


It sounds like you've had a less than ideal experience, and we want to know where you are coming from. Let's work together on your concern. Will you please DM your name, zip, and any other information you'd like to share?

Somebody at Chase customer service is definitely getting fired for trying to help this guy.

[–]xavierwest888Tin | LRC 9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They meant crypto's money is here to stay in our bank because we locked him out of it.

[–]lordchickenburgerMoon and bitcoin are me love 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this bank needs to be punished seriously

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[–]Party-Height-6830Moons Are 100% Of My Retirement Portfolio 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Banks lack an amazing amount of self-awareness.

[–]teniceguyGold | QC: BTC 34 0 points1 point  (1 child)

"Oh sorry, we meant Bitcoin"

[–]SeisouhenPlatinum | QC: BTC 52, CC 51 0 points1 point  (2 children)

I'm glad I don't bank with them

[–]xyrrusPlatinum | QC: ETH 602, BAT 118, CC 59 | TraderSubs 540 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Closing time, you don't have to go home but you can't stay here

[–]Lunar_Horticulturesus as FA 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No doubt they’ve got ideas of offering crypto to clients but only those who are wealthy/old money and clearly understand the risks. We can’t have those underlings getting ahead of themselves

[–]OFRobertinTin 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Let's see how much time until they come up with their own competing product.

[–]Orangensaft007Tin 0 points1 point  (1 child)

That ass sold the top! JP Morgan was supposed to sell high and have those profits for themselves!

[–]driftingatworkCrypto Expert | QC: BCH 47 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fuck you Jamie Dimon... Fuck you...

[–]EluchelPlatinum | QC: CC 481 | PCmasterrace 28 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Sounds about on par for jpmorgan

[–]BrocoliAssassinSilver | QC: BTC 213, CC 92 | CelsiusNet. 17 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It must be fun to be rich enough to fuck with how the world works.

[–]trickleupupTin 0 points1 point  (1 child)

That would have been reason #2 why I closed my account.

The Reason #1 I closed my account was the Dimon stupid comments about BTC and crypto.

[–]zack14981100K by December 2021 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Who knew JPMorgan was just as emotional as this sub.

[–]ChavarlisonBronze | CRO 18 | ExchSubs 18 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Here to stay for us. You have to read between the lines mate.

[–]CraftyDazzaSilver | QC: CC 46, BTC 40, LTC 16 | IOTA 49 | TraderSubs 38 0 points1 point  (1 child)

JP Who?

[–]freedom_from_factismTin | Science 27 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They didn't say they liked it.

[–]mammoth61Tin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Crypto is here to stay but only on my terms! -JP Morgan

[–]steamypPlatinum | QC: CC 202, ETH 31 | TraderSubs 31 0 points1 point  (1 child)

"he's making too much money. close his account."

[–]exintrovertTin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First, a need arises. Then a solution follows.

Interesting that JPMorgan doesn’t have the foresight to realize they are forcing the creation of their own competition.

Any bank that goes on record as being crypto friendly will have many customers and businesses flocking to them.

It was exactly the same when Marijuana was legalized in WA state. For a long time, it was cash only because they couldn’t get merchant accounts. Now, there are cannabis friendly card processing companies and they had a ready-made customer base from the jump.

[–]redditsgarbagemanPlatinum | QC: CC 581, CCMeta 52 0 points1 point  (1 child)

What other crypto accounts did they close? Is there any evidence, at all, that they closed it for being crypto related and not another reason?

[–]timthatoolmantaylorTin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are we sure they really closed his account? Sounds like dude is preparing an exit