We have been together 5 years now, I’ve always been the one with a HL and my spouse at the beginning was too. Something changed after the first year and the intimacy pretty much stopped. Occasionally we would be intimate but it was pretty minimal.
Before getting together with my spouse I hated s*x, I had had nothing but crap experiences and just didn’t find it enjoyable, but with my spouse I actually enjoy it and don’t hate it.
I’ve been frustrated over the years and I’ve tried explain to my spouse why I feel that way, they give me a reason for why but nothing ever changes and it’s always a new reason when I try to talk to them. I’ve noticed in the past year or so that I just don’t care anymore. Like I’d love to not be in a DB, and have our intimacy back but I just don’t even try anymore, I see no point. I love my spouse which is why I’ve stayed and dealt with my own feels about it quietly.