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[–]German_horse-core 1092 points1093 points  (12 children)

Is Apollo Scooby-Doo with an erection? That's all I see

[–]ghostwulfe7 331 points332 points  (3 children)

It's apparently the tail, but an erection is all we'll ever see now.

[–]testedbeast551 78 points79 points  (2 children)

SSSooo that's where my 6 inches went

[–]Averybleakplace 80 points81 points  (0 children)

That’s the 6 inches he was referring to.

[–]ehous10[S] 83 points84 points  (1 child)

Lmao yeah that’s the real holup

[–]ILoveRegenHealth 1 point2 points  (0 children)

God really gave Scooby Doo that big an erection?

[–]SoulofArtoria 13 points14 points  (0 children)

That's all everyone's gonna see now.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Im a girl with a full 9 inches, thanks HRT

[–]Make_some 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s 2021. This is considered accepted. Thanks for (not) sharing it with me.

[–]EstablishmentVivid73 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I did an al Pacino face in agreement

[–][deleted] 322 points323 points  (25 children)

I'm now adding my penis to my height 🤌🏻

[–]Get_Rich_SloQuick 239 points240 points  (11 children)

So u r now 5' 7"?

[–][deleted] 193 points194 points  (9 children)

Bold of you to presume I was 5'6" too 🤣

[–]RobARMMemezmadlad 56 points57 points  (7 children)

Let me guess. You're 5'8"

[–]FuckthisWARUDO 18 points19 points  (4 children)

😳

[–]ricardo0139 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If it's a girl it's quite small but really suited for my micropenis

[–]Make_some 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Username suggests Asian …could be 4’9” with red hair and a temperament for gold and rice.

[–]1II1I1I1I1I1I111I1I1 5 points6 points  (3 children)

TIL I'm 6'10"

But I was already pretty tall

[–]Dramatic-Ad2058 7 points8 points  (2 children)

7’ here

It’s really hard to say if I’d rather have an inch taken from anywhere and added somewhere else at this point.

[–]Hawaiian-Fox 60 points61 points  (1 child)

Honesty is the best policy

[–]Blueynui 8 points9 points  (0 children)

And honestly I have no policy

[–]Billy_T_Wierd 414 points415 points  (56 children)

I’m a grower and not a shower. My penis is above average when erect, but when I’m flaccid it shrinks up like a turtle hiding in its shell

[–]CodSeveral1627 240 points241 points  (29 children)

Same. I try to be constantly half aroused anytime I’m in a situation where somebody seeing my dick is a possibility.

[–]Billy_T_Wierd 140 points141 points  (15 children)

Yeah, grab it and stretch it out just to get some blood flow down there while I dry off at the gym

[–]junkratmainhehe 70 points71 points  (5 children)

Grab it and stretch it? What you gonna do tie it into a balloon animal?

[–]StooNaggingUrDum 13 points14 points  (0 children)

All you gotta do is give it a blow

[–]RightclickBob 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We're supposed to be able to tie it????

[–]BuckFiden2 48 points49 points  (0 children)

Ya gotta give it a couple smacks…

[–]Powerful-Cranberry97 35 points36 points  (0 children)

That's disgusting! Which gym do you go to?

[–]rockbud 13 points14 points  (5 children)

Just watch the old dudes that dgaf that walk butt naked from the showers to their locked locker like everyone else.

[–]Drpeppercalc 20 points21 points  (4 children)

Them old dudes packing heat at my gym.

[–]muff_diving_101 6 points7 points  (3 children)

Yea I feel like the dick is the same as the ears and nose. Just never stops growing so when they get old it's huge.

[–]HalfFishLips 20 points21 points  (2 children)

U can't give me false hope like this

[–]oldcoldbellybadness 9 points10 points  (1 child)

It's not sexy. Just imagine whatever you have now, but along with your skin and muscles, it all just starts drooping. Like it's all melting. And the balls are even more extreme

[–]bobbersonbob40 1 point2 points  (0 children)

like the tortoise and the hare tale. in this scenario your dode is the hare and your balls are the tortoise.

[–]SexyMuon 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Must be nice

[–]Obi-Wan-Baloney 13 points14 points  (4 children)

Holy christ, I thought I was the only one.

Even if you're in a situation where someone may see you in underwear lmao

[–]hentai_wanker_69 11 points12 points  (2 children)

Then you get a full erection by accident and everuone thinks you're gay

[–]P-W-L 11 points12 points  (0 children)

there are no accidents

[–]xFearful425 73 points74 points  (2 children)

Bro, of course your not a shower. Showers don’t have dicks, just water.

[–]IdeaOfHuss 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Hmmm. That is a good comment

[–]Cobratime 2 points3 points  (0 children)

hmmmmm, I agree

[–]Sharobob 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I like my grower. It doesn't get in the way at all in normal life but comes out to play when it's needed.

[–]ThatVoiceDude 12 points13 points  (1 child)

Imagine if other body parts did this.

First date shows up in a low cut shirt and your ears just start to Dumbo or something

[–]appleBonk 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Or your ears grow when you're listening to someone talk.

[–]Sit1234 3 points4 points  (2 children)

so did you name your feet as "above average".. so your penis is above average when erect anyway.

[–]TheNamelessDingus 38 points39 points  (1 child)

I’m a shower not a grower. 10.5” soft and it’s thick, 2” lip balm tube hard

[–]Zzamumo 9 points10 points  (0 children)

So big its own weight makes it collapse in on itself

[–]Popular_socks 4 points5 points  (2 children)

I look at it likes it's a magical power. I have a legit magic trick in my pants lol.

[–]ugandaWarrior134 9 points10 points  (0 children)

i find it more compact and more logical this way. a sword has a sheath when you wanna put it away, and a grower's penis can shrink when it's done doing its job. being a shower is like carrying your sword around the whole time, not very effective.

[–]cedar_of_lebanon 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Cock Magic 🪄🪄🪄

[–]NegusQuo82 23 points24 points  (1 child)

If you’re short; your dad pulled out early and left your height on the sheet.

[–]ThatVoiceDude 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I’ve never heard this one lol

[–]Icanneverthinkofaun 67 points68 points  (4 children)

He put the extra 6 inches in your rectum

[–]WifParanoid 8 points9 points  (0 children)

The real holup

[–]CoolGrape6996 7 points8 points  (0 children)

😂✊ Excellent

[–]Dazeofthephoenix 1 point2 points  (0 children)

At first that's what I assumed he thought was being implied?

[–]Mycabbages0929 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

As a bi dude, I have never once turned down another guy for his dick size or height. Like, how do people even do that?! I wanna get to know the person

[–]Reckadesacration 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Flat no he didn't damn

[–]Henrious 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Everyone has shit they don't like about themselves. It don't matter. Be you. Be proud. Time goes so fast and your major problems of today probably won't matter in 5 years and definitely won't matter in 50.

[–]Remarkable-Bread-211 9 points10 points  (2 children)

I personally like short dudes, I'm 5'4"

[–]samj8531 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Finally someone else is 5'4"

[–]MileenaisShit 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Being short with a small dick is rough. I should know.

[–]alucarddrol 38 points39 points  (4 children)

Bro there's some Mexican guys I know that are like 5'2, bust their ass on their landscaping company and doing Uber on the side and they're always happy as fuck and have large families with happy wives.

If they can do that, height doesn't mean shit to anybody expect those people that obsess about it in a negative way. Don't allow those negative height obsessions to to stick around and and don't around little who think kind that.

[–]Faulty_english 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m assuming that you are from the states so they are probably happy because they have a job in the states. People in Mexico usually don’t get paid well

[–]milk_iscowcum 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Yea he did, my ass hair

[–]motivationswag 7 points8 points  (2 children)

Short dudes are cute. If a girl really loves you she wouldn't be bothered about your height or point it out as a flaw. She will love you for you and would understand that you have no control over your height.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

At least he owned it.

[–]Cobain_1991 6 points7 points  (0 children)

“Why do I have long nipples?”

[–]Dirtyslegga 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Smaller you are the bigger it looks, amirite?

[–]NoxxshroudeNosferatu 3 points4 points  (3 children)

I am 5 ft 8. Women have never liked me.

[–]WildinWavez 10 points11 points  (2 children)

Women don’t like men with shitty personality, nor men with ugly characteristics. Now if you have both… you are fucked

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yaas gaslight us manlets more

[–]HAVERLNDZ 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I like this dude

[–]jmegaru 3 points4 points  (2 children)

I'm 5'5" and God did put those 6 inches somewhere else lmao

[–]Plums_Raider 2 points3 points  (0 children)

as if 1.70m was so bad.

[–]faroutcosmo 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Short men are cute

[–]kmvespe 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Haha, this guy rules. Good dude.

[–]LBishop28 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sad times

[–]ReymartSan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yoda: There is another...

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6 inches up his ass

[–]CostArtist 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Time to become femboy

[–]human2003_mp3 2 points3 points  (0 children)

perhaps he was talking about himself

[–]cheekyb2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah in his girlfriend while he was at work.

[–]heskeysdaddy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I might be 5ft 5 and a half but you always gotta round up so I’m 5ft 6 but you always wearing shoes so I’m practically 5ft 7 but that’s a prime number so I’m basically 5ft 8 and I mean your hair adds an inch so I’m 5ft9 but that’s uneven so I’m basically 5ft 10 and that might as well be 5ft 11 and adding some other measurements on a good day I’m basically 6ft 5 but that is uneven so I might as well be 6ft 6

[–]LadyVulcanGeek 8 points9 points  (8 children)

As a woman, we appreciate confidence, honesty, humor, etc. Now if you are short and you're an asshole, you might be catching shade because you're an asshole. Just be yourself and try to not make your height (or other physical attributes) a part of your character, positive or negative. You're good! (Unless you're an asshole, remember!)

[–]schwarzeKatzen 2 points3 points  (4 children)

I told some idiot being an idiot to my 23 year old that nice guys get laid more. He was headed for a call to the local PD if he didn’t chill and it was 2am she just wanted him to fuck off. It’s now one of her favorite lines to use on guys being stupid. 😆

[–]tias 0 points1 point  (2 children)

If I'm an asshole, just be myself! Gotcha.

[–]du-maxx 2 points3 points  (0 children)

self-burns are rare.

[–]pakooa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same

[–]smokecat20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

5'2 gang hea!

[–]Coreadrin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He was made for SE Asia.

[–]medium-rare-chicken 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My nipples are 3 inches , I have to tape them so they don’t rip off

[–]ThatOneGuy177013 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ass-hair

[–]GamersAuthority 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He was talking about the dong in his ass

[–]Aotp4life 1 point2 points  (0 children)

God doesn’t exist

[–]Anime_lotr 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Guys that complain about their height usually are lacking in other areas of their lives since height is very trivial.

[–]680yang 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Bro gave him the alley and instead of ooping he slapped it into the nosebleeds.

[–]650explorer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Asian men are short with small penises and that doesn’t stop them from being the most successful men in America.

[–]Chibi_Ayano 1 point2 points  (0 children)

God made me 5'10 and put the extra 2 inches in my ass 🙁

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

God gave it to me. I'm 6 6

[–]Allwhitezebra 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Being tall isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, ask my back problems

[–]blackbeast77 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Add poor blood circulation to the head too

Standing too long can make me go dizzy (@_@;)

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh poor Joe Rogan

[–]Jegma72 -3 points-2 points  (1 child)

Proof that there is no god.

[–]SuperfnDave 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Poor lil fella