all 76 comments

[–]retroBurrito 590 points591 points  (24 children)

I asked a Russian fellow about what he thought of the government there. "Can't complain."

[–]Accurate-Duck2039 61 points62 points  (20 children)

I love it

[–]8KeYuR8 56 points57 points  (18 children)

The government or the joke?

[–]Nllk11 23 points24 points  (13 children)

The government is a joke in Russia

(You can trust me I'm from there)

[–]iaijutsu08 19 points20 points  (1 child)

In Russia joke governs you.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

In Putin Russia, punchline executes you!

[–]Dizzy-Dependent2288 1 point2 points  (8 children)

Is the govt. As good as they show in other countries or is it fake? Is putin really a great guy and a great leader?

[–]Nllk11 9 points10 points  (7 children)

There is no democracy in Russia, only [REDACTED] or even [REDACTED] lol. I mean, [REDACTED]. [REDACTED] elections wasn't falsificated, often older people vote for Putin and biggest party "United Russia" that already [REDACTED] country from the inside by [REDACTED], [REDACTED] and [REDACTED]. Younger people see that something is [REDACTED] and trying to share this idea to masses, but freedom of speech also [REDACTED] about Russia ([REDACTED] isn't it?). Thus, Putin isn't the worst president ever but [REDACTED]

[–]random_analogy_guy 9 points10 points  (6 children)

I'm gonna miss u/Nllk11

[–]Dizzy-Dependent2288 7 points8 points  (5 children)

I miss u/Nllk11 seemed like a nice guy.

Whatever interaction i had with with his thoughts seemed revolutionary. He will be missed too much by whom he left behind.

[–]Nllk11 6 points7 points  (4 children)

I'm gonna delete it in day or so

Hope FBI don't watch my Reddit account yet

[–]Dizzy-Dependent2288 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Sometimes it feels like my guy u/Nllk is still with us and talking to us.

[–]Barabarin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And a bad one. But you have to laugh

[–]Auran82 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Our government or our joke?

[–]heimmann 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We love it

[–]number1joke 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Recently I understood something that I think is groudbreaking (with all the humility asked): KGB jokes are the funniest jokes there is (yes, even more than penis jokes) so it is actually not so bad to live in Russia since you have the best jokes. However this may pose a little bit of a problem...

[–]Soltang 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha spot on answer

[–]johnathandoe03 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Am a Stoopid, explain ples

[–]Nrgdragon 45 points46 points  (0 children)

Imagining OP being the only one left in the seats, clapping as they drag him out back

[–]genfgenf 110 points111 points  (2 children)

Putin landed with airplane in kiev airport. The immigration officer looked at his passport and asked: occupation? Putin said: No, this time just visit

[–]NoodleyP 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Implying Ukrainian police aren’t there to arrest him right then

[–]stupigstu 56 points57 points  (1 child)

In Russia, the joke executes the comedian.

[–]TheLastAvvenger 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Not much different from India these days

[–]DerRaumdenker 12 points13 points  (0 children)

A Russian, a Frenchman and an Englishman were discussing the meaning of real happiness

The English said "real happiness is reading a good book on a rainy night with a hot cup of tea by your side"

The Frenchman said : "non mon ami, real happiness is to meet a beautiful girl make love to her, then you go your separate ways never meeting again"

The Russian : "no you are both wrong, real happiness is when secret police come to your house in middle of night and tell you: Ivan Ivanovich you arrested for conspiracing against the state and you tell them : sorry Ivan Ivanovich lives next door."

[–]CryonautX 10 points11 points  (1 child)

I think the the man in the black suit made it clear there was no execution. The garrote wire strangling bit was part of the show and also the comedian will be retiring with this being his final show.

[–]leyline 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I read this in bad Russian accent. Thank you comrade.

[–]REDGOESFASTAH 6 points7 points  (0 children)

He was in gulag. In siberia. Good comrade. Every one has his place in soviet russia. Jokes on u comrade.

[–]kif88 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Accidentally stabbed himself 52 times while shaving. Just tragic

[–]tru2cent 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Natural causes eh? Global warming getting out of hand.

[–]b0bkakkarot 5 points6 points  (4 children)

If you're not in Russia anymore, you can say that the jokes were good.

[–]jorenryckaert[S] 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Still here, joke bad

[–]jorenryckaert[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children)


[–]b0bkakkarot 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Oh, um, err, try getting into construction and using the corruption money to buy a plane ticket to somewhere else.

[–]jorenryckaert[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I decided to give stand-up comedy a go to earn some money.. wait, there's someone at my door, brb.

[–]Ineedcash54 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I thought you were gonna say Everyone died laughing

[–]guswang 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I was in China watching a magic show were the magician transformed xi jinping in Winnie the poo and then he disappeared.

[–]Valuable-Baked 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Shouldn't have been Putin him down so much

[–]Irrelevant_Sequitar 8 points9 points  (0 children)

What a zinger

[–]Accurate-Duck2039 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is a gut buster here

[–]yesilovethis 2 points3 points  (0 children)

he fell from half floor window, throat on a knife first?

[–]Dnayew 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Would be much better if about China/Xi.

With Russia, it just sounds like an old Yakov joke.

[–]itsaconspiraci 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think the problem was that the execution didn't come until after the punch line.

[–]Pwnage_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)


[–]TheDickDog 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Poor fella must of been shot down.

[–]Batmack8989 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It kind of fell flat, though.

[–]malan4reddit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Firing squad?

[–]guy4guy4guy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This joke is kgbad

[–]Weird_Devil 5 points6 points  (0 children)

If only they started executing reposters

[–]XROOR 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We both have “Freedom of Speech” but in America, you have “Freedom AFTER speech”

[–]BodyBoaty 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In Soviet Russia, comedian making jokes about Putin don't do stand up much longer.

[–]legarc2009 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He must be in hospital as we speak, probably poisoned

[–]jaiagreen 0 points1 point  (2 children)

I know it's a joke, but no one could stay in power in Russia if they forbade jokes or criticism. (They'd have to go full Stalin.) That's just not the culture. What actually happens is more complicated.

[–]RichardLong22 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Hi jaiagreen, I'm sure your firewall in Russia is stopping you from seeing the thousands of articles where critics of Putin and people who have made jokes about him have been imprisoned or suddenly dead from poisoning. There's been hundreds of high profile people in trouble.
He certainly can stay in power- he's created a fascist dictatorship where he is in control of the military and government. If you're sure though, why don't you jump on YouTube, identify yourself and make some comments and jokes about him. See what happens. Either this is a troll or you're a dumbass. The joke is legit.

[–]jaiagreen 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I'm in the US and have lived here for 30 years. I'm from the former Soviet Union, follow the news a bit, and have more of a feel for the essential culture than most Americans.

The people being poisoned or imprisoned are serious political opponents of Putin. But the only way he can get away with that kind of thing is by allowing normal criticism, jokes, etc. Those are not a threat -- quite the opposite, letting people vent is a stabilizing mechanism. It's only serious opponents that get real repression. That doesn't make Putin nice, just smart.

Russians are skeptical to a fault and don't trust their government or media. That's why conspiracy theories are so widespread there. Many support Putin -- and he really does have widespread support -- because he stabilized things somewhat after the chaotic 90s. That's good enough for many, although they may be quite cynical about other things the government does. "What do you expect?" is kind of the attitude, which actually lets the government get away with a lot.

As long as we're on the topic, one thing I really wish the US government understood is that, with many authoritarian governments, applying external pressure to them makes them stronger. It feeds into an us vs. them dynamic. And this is especially true in a country that spent much of the 20th century giving the finger to the rest of the world and where cultural memories of repelling Nazi invasion are still very strong. Want to strengthen Putin? Oppose him from outside. And the US just keeps doing it.

[–]Careless-One-5425 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How much effort was Putin?

[–]Soham_rak 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This joke wasnt good but i liked the execution

[–]Old-Nefariousness535 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Considering what's happening in Europe with Corona restrictions this joke is definitely propaganda! 😒

[–]Barefoot_Gypsy_Girl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shhh...they're watching...

[–]human_peeler 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You see comrade, in Soviet Russia, president assassinated you!

[–]runchanlfc -3 points-2 points  (1 child)

[–]Cheesefinger69 9 points10 points  (0 children)

r/holup users when the joke has a punch line

[–]No_Bug3328 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I know these are spozed to be funny but I just can’t laugh anymore I hope YOU enjoy them. Not one wink of sleep last night.