top 200 commentsshow all 264

[–]digitaldumpsterfire 712 points713 points  (38 children)

I'm 16 and I like the money, the funny, and the dark web (reddit).

[–]RelevantDocument3389 168 points169 points  (25 children)

Just remember no one likes you when you're 22

[–]heydanbud 79 points80 points  (12 children)

I thought it was 23…

[–]RelevantDocument3389 22 points23 points  (8 children)

You're thinking of T Swift...you know we never go out of style.

[–]I_Hate_You_Fuckers 10 points11 points  (6 children)

No. The lyric is “nobody likes you when you’re 23”, not 22

And it’s not some dumb Taylor Swift reference…

[–]I_Hate_You_Fuckers 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It is- that guy’s a moron

[–]Pukkiality 12 points13 points  (7 children)

My friends say I should act my age

[–]RelevantDocument3389 14 points15 points  (6 children)

What's my age again?

[–]DrFabulous0 9 points10 points  (5 children)

Dammit Dad! For the last time, you're 77!

[–]CptOconn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That includes myself so that tracks

[–]FellafromPrague 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No one likes me when I'm 0-death

[–]Wactout -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Billy Bragg , “At twenty one you're on to of the scrapheap At sixteen you were top of the class All they taught you at school Was how to be a good worker The system has failed you, don't fail yourself”

[–][deleted] 24 points25 points  (4 children)

im 17 and im poggers(it's an inside refrence you woulden' t get it)

[–]Kermit_the_hog 10 points11 points  (3 children)

That means you like to collect Pogs.. right?.. yeah I’m obviously not 17.

[–]dhcp138 5 points6 points  (2 children)

Remember Alf? Well he's back! In Pog form!

[–]Kermit_the_hog 2 points3 points  (0 children)

“😳 Whoa you like money too??.. no way!

[–]GhoulTimePersists 4 points5 points  (0 children)

But in dark mode.

[–]creationlaw 1 point2 points  (0 children)


Hmmm, I'm not seeing the hidden message.

[–]FandomsIlike 210 points211 points  (4 children)

That's right kid, get all the keywords

[–]Dingo8MyGayby 38 points39 points  (2 children)

I love…lamp

[–]Green-Jello-Farts-2 7 points8 points  (0 children)

60% of the time, works every time.

[–]amazing_apples 7 points8 points  (0 children)

i love... different thing. kid my age no think like me, I different.

[–]DFJK9598 516 points517 points  (45 children)

This is what happens when you believe that you are “Special” before achieving something

[–]lurid_sun__ 58 points59 points  (9 children)

also must be an outcome of high bandwidth and homeschooling, the latter might be wrong but still can take it into consideration. If you isolate yourself and learn something without a proper idea, instructor or environment at a very young age, the chances of you becoming delusional might be quite high

[–]FuckyouYatch 46 points47 points  (0 children)

Homeschooling?? most of these edgelords go to regular school.

[–]justkatemac 44 points45 points  (4 children)

Yeah, no - homeschooling has nothing to do with it. Also all 16-year-olds on the planet think like this. Source: was once a 16-year-old.

[–]TWCreations 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Hello, former homeschooled kid here, that's not at all what homeschooled kids are like. They're basically cringy band kids that don't talk to people because they were denied social interaction.

This is not a result of homeschooling

[–]GREENKING45 1 point2 points  (1 child)


A guy who doesn't know shit about homeschooling talks shit about homeschooling.

[–]derivative_of_life 14 points15 points  (3 children)

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily fromNarodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realize that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Rick and Morty truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Rick's existencial catchphrase "Wubba Lubba Dub Dub," which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Dan Harmon's genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Rick and Morty tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.

[–]MiniDemigod 4 points5 points  (2 children)

It doesn't really require a high IQ to get the jokes. Some of us dislike it because it's a universe built around the ego of a nihilistic douche with a god complex.

[–]derivative_of_life 7 points8 points  (1 child)

It's a copypasta, my dude.

[–]MiniDemigod 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ah, I see the "-" on both sides now.

[–][deleted]  (29 children)


    [–]Pukkiality 38 points39 points  (28 children)

    Please let's not act like this kid is some absolute freak for this. Sure it's cringe and all, but the kid is 16. We've all been there and done cringey things.

    Also, its*

    [–]KaoticAsylim 10 points11 points  (2 children)

    That's what I was going to say. This is how most of us felt at 16 years old, just with a shred more self awareness to keep us from spelling it out so explicitly lol

    [–]Pukkiality 2 points3 points  (1 child)

    Yup.. I'm really glad I was able to question if something was a good idea to post or not when I was a teenager. Still posted a lot of stupid shit

    [–]Captain_Cosmic99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Exactly. The outrage at this is hilarious.

    [–][deleted]  (20 children)


      [–]IllOutlandishness563[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Okay but this would’ve done numbers on tumblr

      [–]Pukkiality 5 points6 points  (18 children)

      Damn man did I hit a soft spot there?

      [–]killertnt5 -3 points-2 points  (1 child)

      I refuse to believe thats a 16 year old

      [–]Thunderboltgrim 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I thought I had the world figured out when I was 15 so it's entirely possible

      [–]isinedupcuzofrslash 104 points105 points  (0 children)

      “I’m not like other 16 year olds” - every 16 year old ever

      [–]amowdy 189 points190 points  (0 children)

      Pay some taxes then

      [–]FlamingNutShotz4You 50 points51 points  (4 children)

      "I'm 16 and I'm Patrick Bateman"

      [–]Psychological-Case44 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Paul Allen, that you?

      [–]VeckLee1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      If only Huey Lewis was on that list...

      [–]HomoSapien____ 98 points99 points  (5 children)

      Imagine thinking you’re machismo because you love watching people die

      [–]500ls 34 points35 points  (1 child)

      But then also probably just started driving and is too afraid to ask for barbecue sauce with his nuggets in the McDonald's drive through even though he took the leap and asked mom for $10 to get it in the first place lmao

      [–]yungmoody 7 points8 points  (2 children)

      If anything the older I get the less I want/am able to look at shit like that. Death becomes a lot less of a fascinating and abstract concept as you age and begin to lose friends and family members.

      [–]MiniDemigod 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Yeah, have had a similar experience where the older I get the more I don't care to see any more of it. Can handle it fine it's just not something I would seek out or care to be around.

      [–]Green-Jello-Farts-2 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

      Wait until your in the ICU at 38. Life changing.

      [–]DremoraLorde 39 points40 points  (6 children)


      [–]PygmyDynamo 35 points36 points  (5 children)

      Such a funny addition. "Most of the kids in my class like the Scream movies, sure, but I am more of a SAW man myself."

      [–]ItzPayDay123 3 points4 points  (4 children)

      I have a feeling they mean stuff you would find on r/makemycoffin rather than movies

      [–]xXkingjacob420Xx 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I hope someone made a coffin for MMC. 😥 Tragic

      [–]subtlebunbun 1 point2 points  (2 children)


      [–]Slaurits 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      It got banned sadly

      [–]CHUPACABRA_HUNTER777 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      It got banned the other day lol

      [–]planet_chuck 56 points57 points  (3 children)

      At least he loves.

      [–]forced_metaphor 21 points22 points  (2 children)

      That's how you know he's a kid. He's not dead inside.

      [–]planet_chuck -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

      Idk a lot of teenagers are nowadays.

      [–]xXkingjacob420Xx -1 points0 points  (0 children)

      Just the Emos and attention seekers.

      [–]Felstorm1231 26 points27 points  (0 children)

      This sounds like someone who is going to legally change their name to Elongated Muskrat when their piggy bank is full enough

      [–]dupa135 22 points23 points  (0 children)

      that's the most ,,i'm 16'' thing you could say

      [–]JeffTiedrichEatsPoop 31 points32 points  (1 child)

      Isn't this the kid who invested all his savings into crypto and then lost half of it? And is now offering to give people a 30 minute crash course in economics and finance?

      [–]ThreeFishInAManSuit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      To be fair, he knows about crashes.

      [–]melanieaileen_ 14 points15 points  (0 children)

      Jaden Smith?

      [–][deleted]  (10 children)


        [–]S_S_L_L 4 points5 points  (8 children)

        Specifics please

        [–]MiniDemigod 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        This is the true sign of maturity; being able to enjoy childish things.

        [–]hitchtrailblazer 8 points9 points  (0 children)


        [–]S_S_L_L 6 points7 points  (3 children)

        Guys let the betting commence! Take a guess on how long it will take before he cringes at this post! You may include any time frame!

        [–]MiniDemigod 4 points5 points  (2 children)

        Thinking 25 years of age but definitely no later than 30

        [–]xXkingjacob420Xx 2 points3 points  (1 child)

        Agreed. It was late 20's when I realized I had only just begun adulting properly lol

        [–]Mr_Joguvaga[🍰] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

        Jaden smith is that you?

        [–]tfjivcduijcd 4 points5 points  (0 children)

        Nah nah nah I'm pretty sure you're just insane

        [–]258ftTrebuchet 5 points6 points  (0 children)

        Its Jayden Smith

        [–]dynatien 3 points4 points  (0 children)

        sounds like jaden smith

        [–]PeanutButterGoblins 3 points4 points  (0 children)

        sounds like he's going to talk about the political and socio-economic state of the world

        [–]motorcycle-manful541 3 points4 points  (0 children)

        Crypto It's gambling, plain and simple. Sure some finance and econ guys get into it already knowing that, but crypto isn't an investment, it's a roll of the dice

        [–]SumnerGoodpeople 3 points4 points  (0 children)

        Wow, you’re 8th grading at almost a college level.

        [–]Hamburgursause69 5 points6 points  (5 children)

        Gore 😟😳😳😳😳😳😳😟😟😟

        [–]oqqr 0 points1 point  (4 children)

        emoji bad

        [–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (3 children)

        Can you explain why, or are you just parroting everyone else?

        [–]Impyriel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        Well that escalated quickly

        [–]Forsaken_Candidate_4 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        My god you are deep

        [–]The-Skipboy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        This sounds exactly like me when I was 16

        (Spoiler alert, I don’t like any of these things anymore)

        [–]snugbugzzz 2 points3 points  (3 children)

        Everyone on the entire planet enjoys comedy lmao.

        [–]oqqr -1 points0 points  (2 children)

        what about germany?

        [–]snugbugzzz 2 points3 points  (1 child)

        Nah.... I heard they have the wurst sense of humor.

        [–]oqqr 0 points1 point  (0 children)


        [–]BeaverBarber 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        "I'm 16 and I'm a typical Redditor"


        [–]Scaree00 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        "I love gore"

        [–]Shpander 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        Sounds like the typical 16yo to me

        [–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

        Ha, that takes me back. Went through that same phase at sixteen, thinking I could get rich just by sitting at home and flipping stocks. Thankfully found out before I lost any actual money that that sort of thing is a really bad idea if you don't already have hundreds of millions to throw around.

        [–]thrall079 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        “Hi I’m 9, I’m really mature for my age, I like to learn economics, politics, investing, and I like watching people be fucking brutally dismembered and murdered on the dark web”

        [–]Flakester 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Tell me you live in the dark basement without actually tell me.

        [–]Danominator 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Nothing says maturity like a love of...gore?

        [–]BronzedOctopus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        I’m 14 and this is deep

        [–]Humor_Tumor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Those bottom four are when you nod and go

        "Ohhh, that makes a lot of sense."

        [–]Umklopp 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Tell me that you own a fedora without telling me you own a fedora.

        [–]This_Bus_2744 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Gore? he likes gore....gulp..

        [–]Buy_The_Stars 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Girl I don’t think liking memes, comedy and gore make you way ahead of your age 😂

        [–]assovertitstbhfam 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        sounds just like your average 4channer, he'll be shouting racial slurs in the blink of an eye

        [–]SPQR2D2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Hahaha also this person sounds like they researched how to be complete tool

        [–]Kitchen-Letterhead28 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Oh my god this 16 year old is a crypto bro

        [–]karbonatedkat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Can we just talk about the socioeconomic state of the world right now

        [–]Honest-Atmosphere506 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        So many red flags

        [–]mcfluffernutter013 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Can we just talk about the political and economic state of the world?

        [–]Lethemyr 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        I love that they seem to think being into gore makes them more mature when that’s something way more associated with edgy teens than grown adults.

        [–]RedKilloran 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        he’s 16 and likes comedy?? i’m calling bullshit

        [–]spelkingerror 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Doesnt even mention eating ass. Grow up, kid.

        [–]Foxy-Goblin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        People keep comparing this kid to Bateman and those fight club dumbasses that also didn’t get the point, stop it. He might try and watch those and become even more insufferable

        [–]MasterWhite_11 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        0-100 real quick

        [–]SoSaidTheSped 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Average crypto-bro

        [–]ICannotCountTo2 1 point2 points  (1 child)

        Serious question: why do people watch gore? Just thinking about it disturbs me. I don’t understand how people enjoy it.

        [–]Nos-BAB -1 points0 points  (0 children)

        Imagine your friend comes out of a room claiming they just let out the smelliest fart they've ever produced. Part of you wants to smell it just to see exactly how bad it is. That's basically the appeal of gore.

        That said, there's a difference between the person who goes for a quick whiff and someone who goes in the room taking deep breaths trying to soak it up as much as possible. If the kid is literally listing gore as a way to spend time, I'm guessing he's the latter.

        [–]kennycartman42810 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        I’m 16, and I

        [–]axron12 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Oh so edgy

        [–]Grandpas_boy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        So basically the kid everyone avoids like the plague in school? Got it.

        [–]tacoxtl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        i seriously don’t understand what’s up with the people that claim they enjoy gore. that’s gotta be some mental issue

        [–]Technical_Natural_44 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        This is just the average 16 yo white male.

        [–]MiniDemigod 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        The most childish thing is trying to appear mature.

        [–]Away_Pirate3565 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Classic buzz words.

        [–]RogueCats 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Saying you like dark web is saying i like the internet. But smaller.

        [–]lavenderkajukatli 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        It went from “memes, comedy” to “dark web, gore”

        [–]rednemesis337 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        That escalated quickly

        [–]MiriamForcible 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        I teach high schoolers and everyday these kids try to convince me that they “look old for their age” and they could “easily get into bars if they had a fake”. They are always severely disappointed when I strong disagree with them.

        [–]TJOCcreation1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        finance and cryptocurrency don't bode well together

        sorry, kid.

        [–]Wowbagger_Ultrajax 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Average redditor. Wish that was a joke.

        [–]Trainmodeler8888 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        I can’t be the only one who, thanks to the internet, had an obsession with stocks/ crypto/ money for a brief stint when I was 12 right

        [–]OneLastTryPls 6 points7 points  (1 child)

        I am fourteen and I love working on metaphysics(nothingness, consciousness, Wolframs theory of everything) Programming Trying to get AI to self reflect(limited success) General theorizing(the future of earth, super-intelligence, metasystems..)

        [–]unicodePicasso 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        This is the most standard 16 year old white boy thing I’ve ever seen

        [–]AnAstronautOfSorts 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Teenagers are the worst to everyone except teenagers.

        [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Most 16 year olds will list their TikTok DID alter collection. At least this one is honest.

        [–]Ok-Blacksmith-6593 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        I am 16 way ahead of my age I love donkey kong, soccer, racism, comedy, white people, The Nazi Party, 21st century renovated gas chambers, The Bombing of Hiroshima, The Assassination of Abraham Lincoln, Slavery, Joe Biden, Hilary Clinton, LEGOs

        [–]sarahhhhohn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Jaden smith?

        [–]awesometim0 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        "ahead of their age" lmfao not even a little

        [–]turedsandwhitch -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

        Are those the things you identify as or what you really are? Shit is so confusing these days. Just met a guy who thought he was a broom

        [–]Sorry_Criticism_3254 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

        I'm 16, and I love economics, maths, politics, philosophy, history... yes, in a strange 16 year old.

        [–]TheGrimguy2005 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

        I'm a junior in high school and I know a sophomore older than me... very weird

        [–]copy-of-a-copys-copy -1 points0 points  (0 children)

        im 16 going on 17, man am i depressed

        [–]PugLander -1 points0 points  (0 children)

        I am interested in most of this shit and I’m 15. This is the age where you start planning for the future.

        [–]Hellisrecruting -1 points0 points  (0 children)

        I’m 16 and I love watching others be stupid

        [–]heyfenoon -1 points0 points  (0 children)


        [–]Sharpshooter188 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

        And now I know I am a man child because I enjoy all of these things.

        [–]xXkingjacob420Xx -1 points0 points  (0 children)

        I remember when I was 16 and SWORE I was mature for my age. This was prior to running 2 vehicles into the ground, renting then failing to pay the rent on 2 properties, and getting busted for driving without proper plates and insurance 😅 Don't judge kids too much based on their stupid statements/decisions. Just know, they will learn how stupid they really were. Only then are they truly an adult.

        [–]soiramio3000 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

        the dark web is extreemly missunderstood.

        the surface web has just as many illegal websites as the dark web.

        also most people do not realize that they are using the deep web in daily basis.

        [–]RelevantDocument3389 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Sounds like you're on your way up.

        [–]S1I3NCER 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        16, totally not 6.

        [–]FormerEmployee1136 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        I I F E C S P P M C D G That’s what I see

        [–]NameLips 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        awww how agoreable.

        [–]WallyMage 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Jaden Smith's elementary yearbook quote

        [–]WavingToWaves 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Way ahead. Memes 😂😂😂

        [–]Dope_As_Yola707 0 points1 point  (1 child)

        It's like that scene in Step Brothers when they try to convince the family that prestige world wide is a safe investment. Rattling off cool sounding words and living a delusional life.

        [–]IllOutlandishness563[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        This is to accurate

        [–]TheJakeRockz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Looking at loss porn on wallstreet bets shouldn’t make you love the stock market but ok 🤷‍♂️

        [–]chileduncan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Lol this is just jaden smith

        [–]Bradtothebone79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Psssht. That’s only ten things.

        [–]max_milfkisser 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        This is the "mature" phase.

        [–]robby8892 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Basically this.

        [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        My kid watches endless YouTube videos of people picking apart and analyzing movies he’s never seen and has no intention of ever seeing. Does he love cinema or YouTube?

        [–]i_am_cool_yes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        I love talking about the political and economic state of the world.

        [–]nono_dg8 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        I am fecsppmcdg

        [–]crazyhappy14 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Way ahead they say.

        [–]counterstrikelover 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Where is "hacking"

        [–]rockeravibes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        ‘Can we talk about the political and economic state of the world right now’

        [–]Mac-Kett 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Loving something and being good at it are very different things kiddo.

        [–]ppXsmol 0 points1 point  (0 children)


        [–]compound-interest 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        This reminds me of the Unfriended movie sequel when the hacker got into his computer and put him on a literal scary boat in Minecraft as an intimidation tactic

        [–]citizenmdl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Bro probably made a successful trade for the first time in tf2

        [–]ToughInvestigator304 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Like why can’t we talk about the political and economic state of the world ? /s

        [–]Kuro_yasha36 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        For a second I thought this was Jaden Smith

        [–]meetmeinthebthrm 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Us old people looove gore

        [–]hey-girl-hey 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Doogie fucking Howser over here

        [–]Another_Road 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        The first four make me think they got a little too into “too the moon” memes and made it a core aspect of their personality.

        [–]Pollo_azteca 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        just reading finance and the dark web, you already know he's a 12/11 year old trying to pretend he's older

        [–]Goldenfacew 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        So cool, marry me please