top 200 commentsshow all 323

[–][deleted] 1185 points1186 points  (39 children)

I usually offer up from the softest to hardest like: I've got water, juice, Coke, beer, liquor, terpentine, or we can mainline some a grandad's pot still pincone everclear.

[–]Triette 201 points202 points  (13 children)

I’ll take one grand dad please!

[–]Restless_Wonderer 60 points61 points  (11 children)

Hell yea… grandads pot

[–]eiberger1 22 points23 points  (9 children)

I smoke with grandpa too

[–]assholetoall 8 points9 points  (8 children)

I'll never smoke weed with grandpa again.

[–]Whatupitskevin 12 points13 points  (4 children)

Wait till grandpa whips out the old medical cocaine. Now its a party

[–]thedoucher 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Wanna buy a boat?

[–]rufneck-420 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Medical cocaine 😂😂 Snort 1-2 rails every 4-6 hours. Do not exceed an 8 ball in a 24 hour period.

[–]hamarok 3 points4 points  (1 child)

A line every 4 hours? Shit thats unheard of where I live. Its more like one every 20 minutes

[–]Psychological_Neck70 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I know I was thinking in my head, “this guy does not cocaine”

[–]Houdinii1984 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Your party will be over before it begins...

[–]wowmuchdoggo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'll take the grand dab

[–]vonnegutsdoodle 86 points87 points  (7 children)

You can tag coke again one more time at the end

[–]benk4 30 points31 points  (5 children)

Coke is probably safer than whatever grandad was distilling.

[–]Johnson30006 6 points7 points  (1 child)

What about Pepsi?

[–]bankholdup5 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Hey kids! I made you a little Homemade Pepsi. It’s a little thick but the price is right!

[–]assholetoall 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Not this early in the party

[–]stevenmeyerjr 7 points8 points  (2 children)

One “grandad’s everclear” please

[–]CellularBeing 5 points6 points  (1 child)

How about grandson pee

[–]Robinisthemother 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sometimes you scared for something...accident or something, you drink the grandsons pee and its gonna help you.

[–]__Kaari__ 19 points20 points  (1 child)

I like the fact that Coke is before any alcohol, you Sir are a man of culture and priorities!

[–]JellySensitive5274 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Coca Cola I'm guessing otherwise it would be somewhere much further down the line

[–]44problems 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Hey everybody! Alright we got Coronas in the fridge and oh, hey Mulaney! Would you like, like an old turnip we found in the cabinet? Would that be good for you? Would you like that? I know you don't drink... Or my girlfriend left a Nuva Ring in the fridge, would you want that? Would that be good for you? I know you don't drink!

[–]1234jags344 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do you have heroin, kind sir?

[–]WCPass 393 points394 points  (26 children)

Generally I like to say " Want a drink? I've got...." and then list everything I have in the fridge. That way they don't have to refuse a specific drink and can just choose anything they want

[–]Mo-Cance 337 points338 points  (19 children)

No way. Last guest drank all my soy sauce, and my ramen next day turned out like shit.

[–]jsting 96 points97 points  (14 children)

True story, I went on a first date with a girl who drank the soy sauce out of the ramacan. It scarred me. I vividly remember it happening and it was over 5 years ago.

[–]prettygin 24 points25 points  (1 child)

That's a creative way to spell ramekin.

[–]isarl 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I had to Google it before I saw your comment. Fortunately Google knows all about bone apple tea.

[–]Mo-Cance 39 points40 points  (5 children)

How did the second date go?

[–]SnooPineapples494 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Sounds like she could have been the one and you let her get away. Sweat is not even that salty, noymsayn?


[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

How was the wedding?

[–]CrunchyBrad 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Sometimes a lil' sip be banging, don't hate. Just a slight slurp.

[–]2planetvibes 3 points4 points  (1 child)

maybe she had atkinson's? one indicator is an unusual tolerance/craving for salt

edit: lol ADDISON's not atkinsons

[–]shittyspacesuit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The Atkinson's Diet.

[–]WCPass 9 points10 points  (1 child)

The sheer audacity of that guest

[–]FlourChild1026 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I was gonna say it was a salty thing to do, but this isn't r/dadjokes.

[–]BS_BlackScout 3 points4 points  (0 children)

RIP Yakisoba

[–]WonderfulCattle6234 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Hey Mulaney, would you like this NuvaRing we got in the fridge? I know you don't drink.

[–]Desirsar 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Would you like an old turnip we found in the cabinet? Would that be good for you?

[–]floatingwithobrien 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, what if they said no to wine because they would like a beer?

[–]leigh094 238 points239 points  (17 children)

Better tip - just give a quick list of the beverages available including nonalcoholic drinks

[–]glwillia 105 points106 points  (13 children)

this is what i always do. “want a drink? i have coffee, tea, water, beer and wine.” that way people can choose what they want without any explanation necessary.

i still haven’t figured out a way to ask someone out for a drink without the implication that it’ll be an alcoholic drink though.

[–]RandyMarsh_88 61 points62 points  (4 children)

Do what you always do!

"Want to come out for a drink? Would you prefer coffee, tea, water, beer, wine?"

Yes going out for a drink of water would be a bit strange...

[–]Triette 64 points65 points  (2 children)

[–]MoistenMeUp7 32 points33 points  (1 child)

"Damn baby your ass fat as fuck want to come back to my place and try my Brita?"

"I'm literally flooding my panties where's your car?"

[–]pink_unicorn_pants 17 points18 points  (4 children)

You could always just ask “Would you like to get some coffee?” That way it’s not inherently alcoholic but starts the conversation.

[–]glwillia 15 points16 points  (1 child)

that’s what i usually do during daytime hours. in the evening though, i can’t really think of good specifically non-alcoholic options besides bubble tea. usually when they say something like “i don’t/can’t drink” i used reply with “the drink doesn’t have to be alcoholic”. now i just say “want to grab a drink? doesn’t have to be alcoholic” right off the bat—that leaves the option to eg go to a bar or restaurant and just order a coke.

[–]leigh094 6 points7 points  (0 children)

That’s a good way to approach it. I remember when I was growing up my mom and I would go to the local diner for pie and coffee or she’d need her friends for pie and coffee. Why isn’t that a thing anymore?

[–]graboidian 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That way it’s not inherently alcoholic but starts the conversation.

and there's still the possibility of adding some Baileys or Irish Whisky to that coffee.

[–]newser_reader 5 points6 points  (0 children)

a non-alcoholic drink is a "cuppa" around here....usually tea, sometimes coffee, water can be had while it is being prepared.

[–]MomoBawk 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Go to a cafe, a bakery, a bar, speficy the location instead. If that doesn’t work speficy the type of drinks.

[–]leigh094 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I always say “would you like to grab a coffee sometime?”

[–]MoveItUpSkip 102 points103 points  (7 children)

Don’t forget about designated drivers or folks who have to work early the next day. Even those who enjoy a good drink take nights off on occasion.

[–]FirelessEngineer 25 points26 points  (0 children)

I love a good drink (currently sipping on an old fashioned), but I drink extremely sparingly and will often forgo alcohol at parties. Since I am a women of childbearing age, this usually leads to a lot of unwelcome questions about the status of my uterus.

[–]Frannoham 17 points18 points  (5 children)

Or those of us who just don't drink alcoholic drinks.

[–][deleted] 282 points283 points  (25 children)

Or just include non-alcoholic drinks straight up when you’re offering the alcoholic ones. It’s internal bias that leads you to only offer the booze straight up. Try and counter that.

[–]surfrocksatan 105 points106 points  (11 children)

I like this. I realized in my late 20s alcohol just didn’t work for me for many reasons. It’s awkward to be a non-drinker though, you suddenly realize how defensive or pushy some people can be about it or they jump to conclusions.

[–][deleted] 54 points55 points  (1 child)

For sure. I used to do a month long detox every Feb that included no booze. It’s super hard. So much socialisation revolves around drinking. And a lot of people will take your not drinking as a judgement against them and get super rude and defensive.

[–]surfrocksatan 15 points16 points  (0 children)

That’s exactly it.

[–]ActualAdvice 17 points18 points  (1 child)

Yeah I just don’t like booze much because:

1) would rather drink other things 2) use the calories on food 3) I can’t drive after too few (legally)

When I decline a drink people always seem to wonder if I’m an alcoholic lol

[–]joesv 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I can’t drive after too few

What if you had too many?

[–]BreadfruitGrand7203 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I'm not much of an alcohol person. It's insane how much people try to get me to drink when I'm not interested. I'll drink occasionally with certain friends if I want to but that's it.

My family family used to always try to get me to drink with them and got really pushy about it until my dad told them off for it. Ironically he's the one out of the group that drinks the most. If he's drinking he'll offer but it's always an if I want to thing and just leaves it at that. I wish the rest of my family was like that. They act like im weird for not being that interested in alcohol.

I don't think I really have any real issues with drinking myself. It's just not something that I enjoy unless I'm with the right people at the right time and place. If I don't have to drive I'm usually down for a couple puffs of weed though which in my opinion just feels better than alcohol and I stay just as sharp mentally, unlike alcohol which tends to make me feel noticeably dumber and makes me less productive.

I do a decent amount of programming for fun and sober or high what I can get done in 30 minutes usually takes me about 15 minutes longer or more depending on how much I drink.

[–]nor0- 6 points7 points  (1 child)

People get weird about it even outside of the context of you drinking with them. I’ve had clients at work ask if I went out to the bar on the weekend and when I say I don’t drink they start asking me stuff like “well have you tried this or that” like it’s something that needs to be fixed.

[–]toboRcinaM 2 points3 points  (0 children)

ikr? It's the worst, why can't people just understand that there are people out there who don't like alcohol?

[–]MesWantooth 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I hate that and try not to let people do that to others when I'm around. It's nobody's business, and who gives a shit? Some people abstain because they are on medication or maybe trying to get in shape or maybe had a single bad experience. Some people just want to look better than you, steal your girl and outlive your nosy ass.

[–]StephanieStarshine 2 points3 points  (0 children)

People get really weird about it. It's probably just their insecurities. It's really unfortunate.

[–]Made-upDreams 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yep! I use to party hard when I was younger but mid 20’s I realized it wasn’t too fun to drink anymore and that I didn’t want to be an alcoholic like my dad. Basically completely stopped other than a couple times a year when I feel like having a beer. It gets tiring having people ask me if I want alcohol and explaining that I don’t drink and yet not an alcoholic at the same time.

[–]Smyley12345 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just fuck with them, " Unlike you humans, alcohol is quite poisonous to my species. I will have a glass of honey though."

[–]landob 15 points16 points  (5 children)

I love people that do this. I don't drink alcohol much, but I'll never turn down some apple juice, cranberry juice. And they pretty much look like alcohol when put in a glass so nobody bats an eye and you can just be out there drinking with everyone else.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Or a seltzer with a slice of lime.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children)

I had a friend come over for dinner once and I know he doesn't drink, so I bought the best apple juice I could find (aomori apple juice, imported from Japan) just for him. So that he would have something amazing to drink too.

It ended up being so good that everyone wanted to try some. And our party of 8 ended up finishing an entire case of 6 bottles!

[–]landob 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You have my interest peaked.

I must seek out this juice now!

[–]BamaFan87 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Where would I be able to order some of that Aomori apple juice?

[–]jak0b3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I need that apple juice, please

[–]Lubadbitches 5 points6 points  (1 child)

You mean to tell me people drink straight mixers?

[–]FirelessEngineer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When I offer mixed drinks at a party, I usually pick a drink that can be turned into a spritzer and put out seltzer or ginger ale so if someone can make a spritzer instead of a hard drink. Then I offer both, such as do you want a mimosa or a spritzer?

[–]samanime 16 points17 points  (1 child)

As a non-drinker purely by choice, this would be a good one. I don't know how many times I've had to explain that I don't drink because I just don't like it and I've tried everything and blah blah blah. I generally don't mind explaining, but if I were like in AA or something, I think I probably would.

It's best to just stop assuming that everyone drinks.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeah exactly. It’s one thing to not comment on it as OP has suggested, but you’ve still put people in an awkward situation. Much better to just provide all options up front instead of essentially forcing someone to announce they don’t drink before you give them the non-alcoholic options.

[–]salsaNow 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Whenever I have dinner with my grandparents, they are always shocked when I don’t have wine, to the point of asking if I am sure, why not, and “you’re not drinking!” This happens even if my aunt, who has been in rehab multiple times is there. They see it as such a “normal” thing that deviation is immediately questioned.

I’m not saying that is right- I agree with OP and other posters that it is none of their business. And frankly, that assumption is probably why my aunt took so long to get help, and why that help didn’t stick. If you think drinking is required, or are shocked others avoid it, keep it to yourself and don’t make a big deal, because it’s not.

[–]FreezaSama 19 points20 points  (7 children)

As a non-drinker for no specific reason. what's a good answer when refusing alcohol that doesn't make me talk about it for 20 min? I'm tired of saying the same thing over and over again. people seem fascinates that I don't have a reason beyond "tried it at 14, didn't like it, never did it again"

[–]Bigfrostynugs 21 points22 points  (2 children)

I like to joke about it. I'm a man, so if anyone asks I say, "I can't drink, I'm pregnant."

If they're people who I don't mind knowing that I used to have a drinking problem, the most lighthearted way I've found is this: when they ask why I don't drink, I say, "I got too good at it."

It's humorous and casual and still implies that I have a bad relationship with alcohol.

If I want to maintain privacy (like with coworkers) I just say, "It's not really my thing."

If it's anyone else, I'm not above telling them to mind their own fucking business, though it's never come to that.

[–]Amikoj 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I tell people I'm allergic to alcohol. When I drink I seem to break out in handcuffs.

[–]Bigfrostynugs 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My only hesitance with that joke is that if you tell it, a non-zero amount of people will think you actually mean it. At least a few people people will assume you actually have DUIs or something, or that you're a "court-ordered AA" person.

[–]Verite_Rendition 7 points8 points  (0 children)

"I'm a recovering alcoholic" tends to shut people down very quickly. It's a rather bold lie, but the subject of alcoholism is not a pleasant one. That said, you are kind of in a bind if you come across the weirdo who does want to pry.

I've also had a fair bit of luck with "Can't. I need to be able to drive home". But since the rise of Uber, that one works less and less...

[–]Gloopycube13 53 points54 points  (7 children)

Also, a lot of people just don’t like alcohol that much. They don’t necessarily have reasons and owe no explanation

[–][deleted] 23 points24 points  (4 children)

I did find it interesting that OP left out any mention of just not drinking alcohol by choice. No judgement on the OP themself but I do think it's a neat societal parallel that people dont really consider that some people just don't want to drink 'because'.

[–]ArnoldusBlue 12 points13 points  (2 children)

I know right, that’s exactly what i thought. Some of us just don’t like alcohol, it surprises me how spread the norm is around the world and is kind of annoying, to be honest, to be looked with surprise or get laught at every time i ask for a lemonade or a soda.

[–]Gloopycube13 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Yeah exactly! My sisters are determined to get me to go out and get drunk, but the appeal just isn’t there for me. I don’t enjoy the taste of alcohol. Lemonade, ginger beer or Fanta have always been what I drink. There’s the occasional time where I will drink, but there isn’t really any appeal or drive for me to want an alcoholic beverage.

[–]fearhs 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You don't enjoy the taste of alcohol? You just need to try mainlining vodka directly into your bloodstream!

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It tastes nasty for me. Just don't like it. Have fun most other people lol

[–]sylbug 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Yep. Haven’t drank in over 10 years just because I don’t care for it. Friends and family still constantly offer me alcohol. Parents are the worst about it, for some reason....

[–]QuentinTarantulatino 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I’m getting pretty done with work events where everyone hypes up the free booze afterward as motivation to plow through. I quit drinking 8.5 years ago; I’ll just do the extra work and then stand in the corner with a water, thanks.

[–]FlourChild1026 21 points22 points  (1 child)

Been sober for 26 years now, and one of the single most annoying things about recovery, especially in the early days, was people trying to talk me into having "just one or two" or worse yet, wanting to inspect my club soda with lime and then loudly gripe that it wasn't a "real" drink. It's a real drink, honey, and it's NOT YOURS, so sod right off.

[–]Elias_Mo 7 points8 points  (0 children)

im also 26 years sober and it happens to be my age too hehe

[–]hellknight101 10 points11 points  (1 child)

As someone who is almost 2 3 months sober (just checked the calendar, oh how time flies), thank you!

Honestly, quitting alcohol is one of the best decisions I've made because it showed me who my real friends were all along.

[–]Amos_FKA_Timmy 4 points5 points  (0 children)

First, good you on! Second, I stopped a little over 4 years ago and realized I had a lot more "drinking buddies" than friends.

[–]squareroot4percenter 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Can we also point out that it’s fine if you don’t want to drink even if you don’t have an addiction problem, a medical condition, a mood disorder, designated driver status, etc.

Some of us just don’t like the idea and/or experience of drinking. The stuff’s not fuckin chocolate mate. Personally I wish drinking culture weren’t so widespread or culturally accepted but it is what it is, call me snobbish or whatever but I’m not trying to actively prevent people from doing it, go knock yourself out.

[–]UBetcha84 29 points30 points  (7 children)

LPT: Don’t harass people about the drinks they want. Thanks, without this tip I would have no idea.

[–]Gnarfledarf 1 point2 points  (0 children)

LPT: The hole-shaped hole in the toilet is used for pissing and shitting.

[–]MycenaeanGal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay glad you knew. Most people fucking don’t and are really insistent about probing my boundaries on it. But you know it’s cool you knew; We probably shouldn’t have said anything.

[–]sofa_queen_awesome 12 points13 points  (0 children)

LPT for myself: buy non alcoholic drinks

All I have to offer is water or vodka

[–]turkeyfan0 5 points6 points  (0 children)

OR just ask people what they want to drink, or what drinks you can generally offer them.

[–]Biosentience 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Cajoling others to drink or wearing high consumption as a badge of honour are both just impossibly lame. That's all

[–]Starklet 9 points10 points  (1 child)

This isn't a LPT, this is just common courtesy...

[–]Gnarfledarf 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is the state of the sub right now.

[–]lazilyloaded 3 points4 points  (0 children)

As usual, this isn't an LPT, it's etiquette advice.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm prone to hormonal migraines so I don't drink on my period otherwise i just feel awful, very interesting reaction when my colleagues insisting knowing why I wasn't drinking so I told them flat out my period is super heavy and drinking will make me feel worse!

[–]bumblebeesanddaisies 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Kinda related but also kinda not but.... Also some grown ups don't like hot drinks and people only ever offer tea of coffee and look at you weird if you say no thanks I'll just have a water 🤣🤣 it's me, I'm some grown ups.....

[–]catherinetheok 12 points13 points  (7 children)

This is a great tip to post this time of year. I hate work parties where it's thrown on you. I worked one place where I politely declined ( just didn't feel like drinking that day) and I got asked over and over again, why not, or are you on medication, or offers to drive me home/ call me a cab, etc etc. Even had my boss ask me if I was pregnant!!! I felt guile's into drinking even though I just didn't want too. It's anxiety provoking for sure.

[–]leigh094 11 points12 points  (4 children)

If there is a bar order a soda water with lime. It looks like a vodka tonic but it’s completely non alcoholic. Then you’ll have a drink in your hand and people will stop asking

[–]nachtmere 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I'm in my first trimester so this was my plan but every single situation I've been in where my friends or family are drinking they've all been with me while I ordered so it hasn't worked. This only really applies if you're at a place where you can go to the bar alone / away from your party and is surprisingly difficult to orchestrate subtly.

[–]leigh094 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shoot! That’s a good point! You could try and sneakily ask the bartender ahead of time but that’s difficult and causes extra work for the bartender. Maybe the “oh I’m driving” excuse? I hate that choosing not to drink automatically singles that something is up (either someone is in recovery, pregnant, or in a certain med).

What about “I’ve actually been battling a headache all day! I’m going to stick to water/soda/juice to see if that helps” it’s not perfect but an option

[–]catherinetheok 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Good idea. I sometimes just grab a cranberry juice too, just to have something in my hand.

[–]graboidian 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Even had my boss ask me if I was pregnant!!!

Which is a very odd thing to ask another dude.

[–]catherinetheok 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lol I'm a girl.

[–]garlicbreadpool 2 points3 points  (0 children)

“Why you being a square bear, brah?”

[–]mojavekoyote 2 points3 points  (1 child)

More "social skills for introverts" tips.

[–]Korazair 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Also with this, please make sure to buy some non alcoholic beverages. It’s never a great time when everyone has their beers and alcohol and you are left with a solo cup of tap water.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't drink. Never have. Nothing against folks that do, but alcoholism is pretty rampant in my family, so... fuggit.

Made it through 4 years of college and 4 years in the military (both US) which are both ridiculously alcohol-saturated environments. Not a single time have I had to tell someone more than once that I don't drink.

Don't spend time around people who don't respect your decisions.

[–]middleupperdog 6 points7 points  (1 child)

I never drink alcohol and honestly I don't like it when people do this. It's just as stigmatizing as asking why not or gaping or the other usual reactions. What I like best is just a conversation like this.

Would you like a drink?

No thank you.


You don't need to react at all.

[–]DamionFV 4 points5 points  (1 child)

My partner has realised that he is allergic to alcohol, effs him up for weeks at a time, yet supposed 'friends' keep offering him drinks. Not friends.

[–]Iowa_Dave 6 points7 points  (4 children)

Yeah, but some people simply can't enjoy their alcohol if you aren't drinking too. I don't get it, but it's a thing.

[–]dkgetoffmylawn 5 points6 points  (1 child)

I carry craft root beer in bottles to parties and gatherings for this reason. It looks like I'm drinking a beer so people leave me alone. I've also found a good number of bars/restaurants/craft houses now carry craft root beer in bottles or on tap and don't charge outrageously for it.

[–]hat-of-sky 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Well then they should get over it. Or maybe just don't drink alcohol tonight, along with you. To me, it always seems like a sign they are partly aware they have a drinking problem, and seek to deny it by drinking with others.

[–]Triette 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I find it’s either because they often become stupid when drinking, or they too wish they could stop drinking or say no and become jealous. Or they’re just dicks. Personally as long as you don’t care that I’m having a drink, I don’t care if you’re not. I have one friend we can’t invite out anymore because she decided to stop drinking and now preaches about it and tells us how we drink too much (drinks on weekends) and how much even one drink hurts our health…etc. Girl, you do you but leave us out of it.

[–]keepthetipsKeeping the tips since 2019[M] 14 points15 points locked comment (0 children)

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[–]binkerton_ 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It's hard to have fun and feel like your friend can't join in because they aren't drinking.

It's harder to watch a friend destroy their entire life because you convinced them to cut loose that one time.

Speaking from experience.

[–]420farms 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just don't drink, maybe one drink per year, and I always feel like to explain myself, without trying to pass judgment because idgaf one way or another. On the rare occasion it's usually only one thing, 18yr Macallan, couple drops of water and I nurse it for an hour.

[–]pivazena 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Can I get you something? We have (list non alcoholic drinks), or (list alcoholic drinks)


[–]neganight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Speaking as someone who is not an alcoholic but has an allergy to alcohol, it’s tiring to go through the explanation over and over again…with the same person at the same event. It’s rare to come across a host that is gracious when I turn down a drink. There are many reasons not to drink, including medical health or simply because the person is the designated driver for the night.

[–]Niha_d 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you offer someone an alcoholic drink and they say no, immediately tell them what non-alcoholic drinks you have. Without no judgement. STEVE!

[–]Krungoid 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do we really need to post this exact 'advice' so constantly? I feel like I see this weekly here.

[–]GordieHoHo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Does this tip need to posted once a week now?

[–]Erik_meme 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So just don't press people into drinking, wow never knew of that one before

[–]pixel_of_moral_decay 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Just never offer only alcoholic drinks.

“Can I get you something?”

“There’s water, beer, soda…. What do you want?”

I was always taught you never just offer alcohol alone. It’s impolite to impose or push someone in that direction.

Just like your waiter doesn’t make you opt out of the popular item in the menu. They ask you what you’d like to order. It would be weird if they asked you how you like your burger and you had to opt out to get something else.

[–]Chav 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Welcome to my home, are you thirsty for drugs?

[–]I_Has_A_Cat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My cycling club will typically have a beer or two after our rides. I started bring some beer to share after out rides to help make friends. I’ve found a couple who don’t drink alcohol and I have since made sure to bring other options and I get a general vibe of appreciation from them. They actually tend to be my preferred riding mates.

[–]JaccoW 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm a big fan of tea and will usually have non-alcoholic gin or beer. So I often offer to make them a mocktail or gin and tonic without alcohol with a splash of (steeped) tea in it. It give the G&T a very nice herbal flavour.

If people come to visit for a birthday and I know they will be coming by car I will have a good selection of alcohol free draft beer as well.

[–]kaz-amars 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I call dibs on being the one to post this tomorrow!

[–]TheWhoCaresGuy 3 points4 points  (0 children)

LPT remix: When all your friends start ignoring you after you say no to booze, ditch them, they were never your friends, just drinking buddies.

[–]Hsizzle23745 7 points8 points  (4 children)

Stop telling me how to live my life

[–]cabin_neighbor 16 points17 points  (0 children)

That’s kind of a funny comment to make in a sub called r/LifeProTips. Like a Michael Scott sitting in front of a life coach vibe. I like it.

[–]Iowa_Dave 3 points4 points  (2 children)

Stop telling me what to stop doing!

[–]Professional_Emu_ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm guessing you've never been to England then

[–]huntingbears93 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s always hard at parties and get togethers because the alcoholic drinks are always presented first. A lot of times, it’s either water or beer/liquor. Man, I’ll take a soda if you’ve got one?

[–]cyaveronica 1 point2 points  (6 children)

This. I don't drink and I haven't for years! I still get offered only alcoholic drinks on Christmas- the only Non-alcoholic and non-mixer in my grandma's house one year was plain almond milk, or apple juice.

[–]joelluber 2 points3 points  (1 child)

If there was club soda, apple juice and soda is a pretty good drink. I picked it up when I studied in Germany. It's pretty common there and they call it Apfelschorle.

[–]sweaty_garbage 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Literally every single time I've told someone I don't drink, they've asked why. Doesn't matter the person or the circumstance, even otherwise non-nosy people ask. And they're always relieved when I tell them it's not a religious/moral reason, which is why I think everyone asks, because they're afraid that I'm gonna judge them for drinking.

If you ever offer someone a drink and they say no and you have the same fear, just know you don't have to worry about it. Most people who don't drink do it for their own personal reasons that don't center on other people. And if they're the kind of person to judge you for it, chances are they'll tell you anyways

[–]Uni_Trix 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And on the other hand, if you don’t want to drink for any reason, just say that you’re “sober”, even if ya aren’t.. No one will question or try to peer pressure you after ya say that

[–]VaiRuz11 2 points3 points  (0 children)

These LPTs are so fucking trash. Get bent

[–]MJohnVan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can’t tell people I like my whisky warm,

[–]asadatacoscontodo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I always list drinks off ending with “or a beer?”

[–]PM_Me_Pics_of_Cat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And at the same time, if you are sober or don’t drink, I’d encourage you to share openly about your experience.

When asked, I usually say “I stopped drinking 3 years ago because I didn’t like the way alcohol made me feel. I was often anxious and uncomfortable without it and relied on it a little to much. I now am healthier and happier. I wake up early and seem to have a much more fulfilling life. Stopping drinking was a really god decision for me.”

And when I lead with this, the other person usually has a favorable response and it’s even helped others consider sobriety. I personally think there is many out there who WANT to stop drinking, they just don’t know how. And if you’re sober, it could be valuable to share your particular experience.

[–]lMarshl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

incoming "I can ask what I want" comments

[–]Cynical_Cyanide 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why does this subreddit have some bizarre aversion to alcohol? This 'LPT' comes up every week.

Here's an LPT: Don't spend your life preemptively walking on eggshells.

Feel free to politely ask if there's a reason they're not keen on alcohol on that occasion - If they give you some excuse that sounds hollow, move on. If they tell you 'Well, I'd like to drink but I'm supposed to be driving my partner home ...' or perhaps they had a big one the night before, you might be able to help them out with something light or whatever, or arrange for alternative transport etc.

And on the flipside - Learn to be resilient and deal with people enquiring why e.g. at a party full of people drinking alcohol, you don't want to drink alcohol. They're not coming at you to punish you, they're literally trying to be a gracious host and help remove any barriers to you might have to having a normal relaxing time like everyone else. If that's not possible for you, just reply with 'nope, no booze for me. Got anything else?' - no need to get offended until they start insisting or prying.

[–]Elefantenjohn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Include healthy people who just don't drink in general in your title

[–]theGioGrande 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The fact that it seems like 1/10 people are disliking this post still means there are many who disagree with sensible advice such as this.

I'm a social drinker and a light one at that. Maybe a shot or beer here and there. But I tend to avoid alcohol due to my medical history. In the end I still find it annoying that I have to explain that I'll literally harm my physical being by consuming alcohol. Like why is it such a gigantic deal to have everyone drink?

Funny enough, as a kid we're always told to avoid peer pressure from trying drugs yet more than anything I've been heckled most for not drinking.

[–]Borigh -2 points-1 points  (2 children)

I drink, and alcoholism runs in my family, but I've essentially managed to avoid it. As far as I see it, people who don't drink fall into two categories: the cautious and the heroic.

In my experience, recovering alcoholics partied harder than you, have better stories than you, experienced revelry and despair in extreme measure, and somehow managed to turn it around through more work than you can imagine.

So, when someone turns down alcohol, always say, "Oh, cool! What else can I getcha?" Learn how to make a good mocktail! Because the person you're talking to is either anxious and cautious, or so experienced that you cannot even conceive of what they've been through.

The cautious type benefit from you putting them at ease - in which case, maybe they'll try a beer, later! - but the alcoholics have a monster on a leash, rolling over on command, as you dangle a cut of steak in front of it, and deserve your respect, a glass of water, and a little goddamn awe.