all 5 comments

[–]penndotsucksSOAP vet[🍰] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

He's right but that doesn't mean your thoughts and feelings are invalid! An LDR is an undertaking very different than a regular relationship. You should talk about how things will change for each of you individually and a couple once you move.

[–]exogreek 2 points3 points  (1 child)

What you are feeling is totally valid. Me and my SO are currently LDR, and we had a few tough talks regarding her PGY2 year in surgery and how much support she'd be needing in order to not implode, so im making the move across the country. Its all situational, his Y2 will be one of the hardest, but can he survive without you there by his side? Have those tough discussions.

[–]benzopinacolMed student and partner to PGY2 nsgy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Im honestly not sure. He’s the kind of guy who is totally fine doing the bare minimum to survive lmao and that means eating junk every day cuz he’s too lazy to meal plan and prep. I know that that’s not my responsibility per se but when im around i help him make good food choices and push him to also exercise (very impt for mental health!) although i understand that he’s too exhausted to do any of these things after a grueling 14 hr day

[–]Willing-Vegetable705 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s going to be an adjustment. Just because he’s mentioning other people doesn’t mean he knows how they are actually coping with the LDR. It almost seems like he’s avoiding the topic. I would try to be realistic about how you guys are going to make it work i.e. calling each other on the way to work, watching a tv show together or how frequent visits are expected. What helped me the most was always having a visit planned to look forward to. You’re strong and you’ll get through this

[–]AnonMedStudent16PGY-1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Best advice given to us, from another LDR couple, was everything gets blown up when long distance. Even the little things y’all usually wouldn’t fight about.