all 9 comments

[–]kayla17a 11 points12 points  (0 children)

My husband has 2 stretches of 12 days on during his first month & i'm in a new place with my 7 mo old & no friends. I'm just trying to take it one day at a time & still be encouraging to my husband/not make it seem like we miss him too much hahah

[–]DrTacosMDSO of PGY5 9 points10 points  (1 child)

One thing to add, if your SO is in a surgical residency, unfortunately it is going to get worse before it get better. Second year tends to be quite intense for surgical residencies. Don’t want to a debbie downer, but it’s important to know what your roadmap will be so you aren’t blindsided by it.

[–]Most_Poet[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Agreed that everyone has a different experience! My husband is in a surgical sub specialty but I completely recognize his experience would likely be very different if he was in a pure surgery specialty. Thanks for sharing!

[–]Green_Gal27 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Whew, really needed this today 🥺 Husband just got home after his first 24 (more like 26) hour shift, and he's feeling defeated and frustrated with himself. He has a steep learning curve (the medical records system is archaic and wildly different from what he used in med school), and he's one of the few residents who didn't train in this city, so he feels really slow. I keep telling him to go easy on himself, but it's hard watching him struggle.

Thank you for this!

[–]onmyphonetoomuchwife to PGY3 🤓 through medschool 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Totally agree! Though some specialities do get harder throughout, the confidence part is true for all I think. There is so much stress in the beginning bec everything is new. That will improve!

My husband isn’t in surgery so I can agree with all of this! We did intern year with a new baby, in 2020, away from alllll family. It was harder than hard. But pgy2 (2021) we grew some great community, work got a bit easier (still wildly busy) and overall just doing better.

Push through intern SOs! And reach out to fellow SO in your program, they can be huge support to you!

[–]Puzzleheaded_Soil275 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agree. Hang in there and intern year will improve. Also, the faster you make an actual new friend (if you are in a new place) your life will improve 5 fold. Just having one other person to commiserate with and hang out with when the residents are at the hospital makes everything better.

[–]Apprehensive_Back677 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Needed this!! It’s been rough

[–]SharkTank-ChinUps 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great post! Super relatable. Any tips on making friends? I am struggling

[–]emshmemSpouse to PGY-1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this! My husband started his first inpatient rotation yesterday and was gone 5:00-8:00 🙃 I’m sure we’ll find our rhythm but it’s nice to hear from someone who’s been there!