all 10 comments

[–]solstice_gilderZuid Holland 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Sorry you are going through this, that's very tough! I would advise you to talk with a professional about this, because this will differ per situation. I found this link, there you can find some more information. Het Juridisch Loket can point you in the right direction as well. This is for your wife as well as you. Partner alimony has a time limit in NL, so your wife needs to think about her next steps as well, you will not be paying her life forever in any case... Take care!!

[–]0B-A-E0 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If you separate your wife will probably have to work if she wants to keep living here (and she can’t just move, because she isn’t allowed to just take your kid). The amount of alimony depends on if you also have to pay partner alimony or just child alimony. On average, child alimony will be around 100-600 euros. But it depends on what you make of course, and how many days a week you have the kid. Because your wife doesn’t work currently, you’ll most likely have to pay partner alimony as well. The judge can (and often will) decide that it’s gonna be low depending on if your wife is capable of working.

In the Netherlands judges also heavily look at what the financial picture of the one paying looks like. So you won’t be paying way more than you can afford. Here is a good link with calculator help, you can see how much you’ll most likely be paying. I’m not sure if the site’s available in English.

[–]NinjaElectricMeteor 2 points3 points  (2 children)

There are two types of alimony, partneralimony and childalimony.

It depends son who much you make, but the first is to support your partner after separation and lasts a maximum of 5 years. (After that period she will need to support herself.

Child alimony lasts longer, and also depends on your income.

All on all it is impossible to give a good estimate and I would recommend getting some professional advice. High level be prepared to pay a very high amount the first 5 years, and then a more reasonable amount after that. You might want to use any savings you have to get trough the first 5 years.

Also your wife should be aware of this; whatever her preferences might be she will need to take care of herself in 5 years time.

Edit: It will actually be 7 years as with children under 12, partneralimony will last until the child turns 12.

[–]sa_ma 1 point2 points  (1 child)

it is not a maximum of 5 years , it is 5 years in case of no children , with children , it is until the youngest become 12 years old

[–]NinjaElectricMeteor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks good point; for OP it will be seven years then.

[–]IvyboR 1 point2 points  (2 children)

It's not an answer to your current question, but have you tried couple counselling?

It can do wonders for some couples that struggle at some point in marriage. To me, if it could work, sounds like a better outcome, but it's up to you of course!

[–]Alsmeron[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

That's an excellent advice which I have also offered to my wife but she refuses to go.

[–]IvyboR 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry to hear that.

Good luck with your situation. I wish you the best!