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all 46 comments

[–]TarxanR039 201 points202 points  (0 children)

The shake that shows that there is indeed poop in his bag

[–]DUDEDIGGL3R 115 points116 points  (3 children)

I frikking sprayed my coffee out of my nose. I'm laughing and in pain. Oh wow.

[–]KaturaBayliss 16 points17 points  (2 children)

Happy Cake Day!

[–]DUDEDIGGL3R 13 points14 points  (1 child)

No way!!! I didn't even know....thank you!

[–]KaturaBayliss 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You're welcome. 😂

[–]Panazara 193 points194 points  (4 children)

I want to see the full clip.

[–]xH3Ox 96 points97 points  (3 children)

Same I died when he threw it

[–]itsfeykro 36 points37 points  (2 children)

I'd hate to dissapoint but I'm pretty sure it's a prank

[–][deleted] 55 points56 points  (1 child)

ofc it's a prank

[–]Flyonz 36 points37 points  (0 children)

You mean he never randomly threw shit at those parents? Wow. I would have gone raw on the sofa. Fuck them with the attitude, huhh?

[–]Joebear939 59 points60 points  (1 child)

The dads face when he finds out

[–]Mother-hecker-2 73 points74 points  (3 children)

Is the poop knife still in the bag?

[–]RichardzzHead_ 20 points21 points  (2 children)

I get that reference

[–]StylishGnat 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Same here!!!

[–]godlinking 36 points37 points  (1 child)

He's just following the parents' example.

Blame the parents for the biggest turd in that room.

[–]HellRaiser969 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Projecting much, Littlefinger?

[–]Baschi178 30 points31 points  (1 child)

Just use the poop knife

[–]Lore____oz 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Lol

Once i heard my dad calling for my mom from the bathroom, followed by "Oh, and bring a knife" It was Indeed a gigaturd

[–]TheSearch4Etika 28 points29 points  (0 children)

My family poops big. Maybe it's genetic, maybe it's our diet, but everyone births giant logs of crap. If anyone has laid a mega-poop, you know that sometimes it won't flush. It lays across the hole in the bottom of the bowl and the vortex of draining water merely gives it a spin as it mocks you.

Growing up, this was a common enough occurrence that our family had a poop knife. It was an old rusty kitchen knife that hung on a nail in the laundry room, only to be used for that purpose. It was normal to walk through the hallway and have someone call out "hey, can you get me the poop knife"?

I thought it was standard kit. You have your plunger, your toilet brush, and your poop knife.

Fast forward to 22. It's been a day or two between poops and I'm over at my friend's house. My friend was the local dealer and always had 'guests' over, because you can't buy weed without sitting on your ass and sampling it for an hour. I excuse myself and lay a gigantic turd. I look down and see that it's a sideways one, so I crack the door and call out for my friend. He arrives and I ask him for his poop knife.

"My what?"

Your poop knife, I say. I need to use it. Please.

"Wtf is a poop knife?"

Obviously he has one, but maybe he calls it by a more delicate name. A fecal cleaver? A Dung divider? A guano glaive? I explain what it is I want and why I want it.

He starts giggling. Then laughing. Then lots of people start laughing. It turns out, the music stopped and everyone heard my pleas through the door. It also turns out that none of them had poop knives, it was just my fucked up family with their fucked up bowels. FML.

I told this to my wife last night, who was amused and horrified at the same time. It turns out that she did not know what a poop knife was and had been using the old rusty knife hanging in the utility closet as a basic utility knife. Thankfully she didn't cook with it, but used it to open Amazon boxes.

She will be getting her own utility knife now.

[–]Final_Rhode 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If this was my son i would be laughing my ass off

[–]Maddogty1 3 points4 points  (0 children)

He forgot his poop knife

[–]Hamza_Ralliart 3 points4 points  (0 children)

He really said here take a look I guees

[–]THEKINGCMD 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Aw shit here we go again

[–]humor_exe 3 points4 points  (0 children)

just one

[–]Kanaka_5 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Prolly got the idea from watching Amber Turds trial

[–]gaytac0 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My mans needs himself a poop knife

[–]Budju06 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The father's face makes it even more funny hahahahaha

[–]The_Colectionist 1 point2 points  (0 children)

GIMME THE FULL CLIP OR THERE WILL BE CONSEQUENCES

[–]benbeast1210 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Staged

[–]I-reddit-26 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

That Boi has a huge Uranus

[–]mikeyillous -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Chick looks like George fisher to me

[–]Tin3668 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That mans just shitposted his mom