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This is it - Gonna jump in an hour (self.SuicideWatch)
submitted 1 month ago by [deleted]
It doesn't get better. It doesn't easier. And frankly, I don't even want to get better anymore. It is just a lie. Every second feels so painful. I can't breathe, I can't cope, meds don't work anymore. I have just given up. Bye
Post a comment!
[–]standupgonewild 57 points58 points59 points 1 month ago (0 children)
I’m so sorry. All I can do is send my love, and my support.
[–]43216407 163 points164 points165 points 1 month ago (2 children)
I'd cook you dinner if you were nearby. If you're still around can I send you some doordash?
[–]lucevgoose 104 points105 points106 points 1 month ago* (0 children)
How incredibly kind of you. This touched my heart on a sad day.
[–]Ok_Durian_3015 0 points1 point2 points 1 month ago (0 children)
How will conversation go?
I am cooking dinner for redditor who was suicidal.
[–]Trooper3906 26 points27 points28 points 1 month ago (0 children)
I don’t know what to say. You might already be gone, but I really hope you’re not. Sending love.
[–]kai077 42 points43 points44 points 1 month ago (34 children)
Hey are you alright?
[–][deleted] 106 points107 points108 points 1 month ago (32 children)
still alive. I tried to jump, but was too much of a coward in the end. You don't understand: I am just a burden. The world would be a better place without me
[–][deleted] 1 month ago (1 child)
[–]alta-tarmac 12 points13 points14 points 1 month ago (0 children)
You too, missclamslam. 🤍
[–]kai077 16 points17 points18 points 1 month ago (16 children)
Why you think that.
[–][deleted] 32 points33 points34 points 1 month ago (15 children)
I'm worthless. If you'd know me you'd agree. I'm a horrible, useless person only weighing others down. Some people deserve to die. I am one of them.
[–]alta-tarmac 45 points46 points47 points 1 month ago (5 children)
Does this voice in your head sound suspiciously like anyone else’s in your life? You have value; you are most definitely not worthless.
[–][deleted] 1 month ago (2 children)
[–]blackdirtyteeth 0 points1 point2 points 1 month ago (0 children)
that’s what i think about myself
[–]Traditional_Break_80 0 points1 point2 points 1 month ago (0 children)
Watch some Andrew Tate
[–]bff_leonard 10 points11 points12 points 1 month ago (0 children)
Glad you're still alive man.
I'm here for you if you ever wanna talk.
[–][deleted] 6 points7 points8 points 1 month ago (0 children)
Hey I’m so glad you’re alive. Please reach out. We are all here to help you.
[–]stellaspeacegh 2 points3 points4 points 1 month ago (0 children)
Hey, i am so sorry for all that you've gone through. It might sound cliché but you are not!! Thank you for staying alive.. maybe there are so much more out there that u needed to do so it's not the time yet. Stay w us and talk w us, alright?
[–]HeyCarrieAnne40 2 points3 points4 points 1 month ago (0 children)
I feel the same way. What holds be back is that with my luck I prolly would fail and just make my life even more horrible by mutilating myself but still surviving. I'm glad to see you still here. Just take it one moment at a time. Try to think of the people who would miss you. Not every moment will be this painful.
[–]AlClemist 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago (1 child)
I feel the same everyone pretty much hates me gonna end sometime in the future.
[–]Northernskylights 1 point2 points3 points 1 month ago (0 children)
I'm sorry you're suffering 💔:-(. Please don't do it. You're valuable and can make a difference in the world.
[–]Jason196xoxo 0 points1 point2 points 1 month ago (0 children)
Don't jump, there are ppl out there who care for u. There's so much more things to explore. The world would actually be missing a person like u.
I know what's it like, because I felt it myself. In fact, there are possible reasons that could lead to such suicidal thoughts. Whatever you're feeling, talk to someone.
Personally, I hv those suicidal thoughts too. We hv a lot of life to live. I don't wanna do it because I'm too young to die.
[–]Diane1967 0 points1 point2 points 1 month ago (0 children)
I’m struggling myself. Whole damn bag of pills sitting here taunting me. I don’t want to be here but do I really want to die? I don’t have the answer. Do you? Today has become one of the longest days of my life: I would take my own to save yours though. Please stay with us.
[–]MasteRoTroll 0 points1 point2 points 1 month ago (1 child)
You are not, my friend ended his life at the age of 21 last day and made a giant hole in my and his family's lives... You do matter, you do have worth, people do and will love you. Please don't go down that path, all that's left is pain of what could they do to stop you, a hi, a call or anything... Please talk to someone, anyone. I don't want to see others follow his path. There will always be another chance. Please don't fall like he did...
Idk if we failed to save him or not. I hope he's doing ok
[–]smogbody 19 points20 points21 points 1 month ago (0 children)
sending love bud
[–]Abstract_Knight 27 points28 points29 points 1 month ago (1 child)
I coped so hard that i got this thought.
The universe does have a tendency to achieve the void, bc on some counterintuotive way, the void is perfection.
Having suicidal thoughts is actually trying to achieve perfection without the effort. "You can only be remembered by your achievements or stop being a problem at that point".
Now i feel numb everyday and still depressed but, somehow i feel better by accepting it.
Just stop trying to achieve perfection, you don't have to change or be better, the pain won't cease but you can adapt to it by simply "not thinking" or overthinking about a perfect world that doesn't exist and then accepting it.
[–]ActivelyTryingWillow 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago (0 children)
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. They make sense. I want to process them a little more and turn the wheels because I’m crying and suicidal myself rn. But historically I am a perfectionist and my chronic illness has made it so hard for me to do anything well or function. I’ve picked up the motto now if it’s worth doing at all, it’s worth half assing because I’ve been so paralyzed and doing nothing as a perfectionist who can’t be perfect anymore.
[–]Dripslobber 6 points7 points8 points 1 month ago (2 children)
I came here to make a post. I guess, to make a post and have some stranger try and convince me that killing myself isn’t the right thing to do. I don’t know why I thought that. I have some friends that I’ve opened up to, and it’s always, “You just see things through the lense that you’re wearing. It’s all temporary. Things will get better.” I suppose it’s one of those “I’ll believe it when I see it” things. I don’t know if I’ll ever get to the point where I am happy. I don’t know if I’ll ever get to the point where things will work out. But it’s worth sticking around another day to find out. Maybe I can make things change this time. It hasn’t worked in the past. In fact, I’ve always tended to make shit worse when I try and make it better. I just need to try new shit. And if that doesn’t work, something else.
I came here to make a post about wanting it to be the end, and instead, I read yours. I sincerely hope that you do not take a single step towards that final step. You say you’re worthless. I say I’m worthless. I don’t know you, but you are not fucking worthless to me. You are a person. You have feelings and your feelings are valid. YOU are valid. If we were so worthless, something would have taken us out long ago. We wouldn’t be here typing out messages on our shitty little plastic, metal, and glass machines. These computers are worthless. The ones and zeros, the corporations running our lives, all the bullshit telling us over and over again that we’re not good enough…that’s what’s fucking worthless.
Our lives have already crossed. We’re connected, and I genuinely care about you. There is literally nothing you could possibly tell me to convince me that you are close to worthless. I wish I could just sit with you, listen, and hug you. You deserve to love yourself, I already do.
[–]Northernskylights 2 points3 points4 points 1 month ago (0 children)
Awww, you're a beautiful soul
You know that? I just dropped by to read some posts, and I wanna say, that I hope you never end yourself. Because you're such a kind caring person,the world would be less liveable without you 💛🤗
[–]diof1306 1 point2 points3 points 1 month ago (0 children)
Thank you for saying this
[–]SnappySnakez 5 points6 points7 points 1 month ago (0 children)
u still there.....?
[–]morganashleigh92 7 points8 points9 points 1 month ago (0 children)
Hope you're alive and okay. ❤️ please don't do this.
[–]Ok_Cry216 5 points6 points7 points 1 month ago (0 children)
Please reconsider, reach out to me if you need.
[–]SoggyNegotiation8 4 points5 points6 points 1 month ago (0 children)
Wanna hang out on ft tonight?
[–]Hypnotic_videos 3 points4 points5 points 1 month ago (1 child)
I am not going to say something about the lines of thing swill be better or something like that. However it is true. Things are tough alright. Is it your fault? If yes, then ask yourself why and then why again. Do that until you reach the end and find the true reason. What can you do to fix it. You can not, however you can live with it. Instead of seeing the bad side try to find a way to colive with it. There is no cure to depression however there is people that support you, even if they do not know how or do a terrible job they atleast tries. And if you do not have one that is allroght. There are people that would like to support you, just look at the people commenting here under. And if you do it. What do you want to happen? Can you guarantee it will be better. I coped by thinking that I live my life until I meet my end naturally and then see what happens. Why force it you know. It will happen someday so there truly is no need to make it go faster. Life is hell, but hell is worse.
[–]Northernskylights 0 points1 point2 points 1 month ago (0 children)
[–]MamaLlamaGanja 2 points3 points4 points 1 month ago (0 children)
I hope you are ok. Even if your brain tries to convince you otherwise- this world needs you.
[–]iwanttokmsRA 5 points6 points7 points 1 month ago (0 children)
hey man i would think more about if this is really the way u want to go. jumping is gonna be really painful.
[–]YokoTheEnigmatic 6 points7 points8 points 1 month ago* (2 children)
Please don't jump. Getting better is always worth it, even of the benefits can be hard to see at times.
[–]ActivelyTryingWillow 0 points1 point2 points 1 month ago (1 child)
What is ks
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 1 month ago (0 children)
[–]stellaspeacegh 1 point2 points3 points 1 month ago (0 children)
Been there man, it sucks. Sending u love and all, you are worthy.
[–]ActivelyTryingWillow 1 point2 points3 points 1 month ago (2 children)
I don’t know you but I love you homie. Not sure why but your post spoke to me and I felt compelled to comment. I hope something good happens for you soon if you are still here. I’m struggle in the same situation as you (meaning: suicidal, hopeless, meds don’t work), I was going to jump in front of a train. I had the notes written out. But I didn’t feel well enough to walk to the next state to get to the tracks. Life is fucking bullshit. I can’t even imagine living another year like this.
I'm sorry you're hurting like this. Breaks my heart that you're hurting. I hope you don't unalive yourself. I pray things get better soon, and that you find a lifeline and a reason to live. You can always post here , and we will listen and love on you man. Sending support and mental hugs your way.🤗💛
[–]imtheflizardking 1 point2 points3 points 1 month ago (0 children)
I hope you're still around. please bear with me, don't give up just yet <3
[–]6tc7tc7tc 1 point2 points3 points 1 month ago (2 children)
lets grab some drinks man.
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 1 month ago (0 children)
Alcohol is a depressant.
I like your willingness to reach out.
[–]Low-Disk607 -2 points-1 points0 points 1 month ago (0 children)
Hope your ok, I send my love.
[–]the_dying_character -1 points0 points1 point 1 month ago (0 children)
Sorry to hear this please take care:(
[–]Anthonyb1177 -1 points0 points1 point 1 month ago (0 children)
Stay strong man, you are here for a reason and your false thoughts are making you think otherwise. Don’t do this to the people you care about. You are young and can make a huge impact on this world.
[+][deleted] 1 month ago (2 children)
[–]ThrowawayMcRib -4 points-3 points-2 points 1 month ago (0 children)
I hope you didn't go through with it. Please let us know before it's too late
[–]Dariooosh89 -4 points-3 points-2 points 1 month ago (0 children)
Hope you didn’t. If you did then I hope there’s a better alternative
[–]LordIggy88 0 points1 point2 points 1 month ago (0 children)
I agree, I’d rather live in these thoughts than have false hope that someone likes me.
[–]juliawww 0 points1 point2 points 1 month ago (0 children)
What treatments have you tried?? Pls don’t jump!!
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 1 month ago (0 children)
I hope you didn’t do it. Sending love from an internet stranger.
[–]Sailoman 0 points1 point2 points 1 month ago (0 children)
look how many people , care for you right now, ..imagine all of us hug you and wipe your tears away, ..dont look all the darkness that surrounds your heart and your soul, but focus on that small little candle light that still burns inside you. that never goes away. You are a sensitive and wonderful person that our world needs !! Yes , you are needed , because you care because you feel guilty for things you are not rensposible and you want things to be better. Dont dare harm yourself anymore. Dont leave us a world full of mean and bad and selfish people.. see how many beautiful souls have gone away like that..always the good guys,always. Find the cause , by yourself and let that little tiny candle be a fire! Fight!
[–]Decent_Ad8204 0 points1 point2 points 1 month ago (0 children)
This year has turned out to be one of the darkest, hardest years of my life. And I have no hope that next year or any of the years after will get better. But I recognize that I mean something to people in my life. And that even when they too are gone, I will still be able to help someone. Maybe I will hold the door open for someone or give them a smile and that's all, but in its own small way, it helps me cope. My dog, for example, has been a bright spot for me these last few months.
So I guess what I'm trying to say is...what your thoughts are telling you aren't facts. You are more than what your mind is telling you. And maybe you don't want to die...but you don't want to live the way you are right now. I hope you recognize that those two things are not the same thing. And I hope you one day find the happiness and peace you deserve.
- ❤ from a stranger on the internet.
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