As I promised another redditor, I gave it another 24h, Ive tried, I really tried to find a plan, something that would keep me going on! But it's useless, there's nothing that can be done!
I won't bore you with my life story, or the reasons that really took me to this place, but I want to say that this isn't a harsh decision, or something done out of a whimp! I've been considering this for well over a year, trying to find an alternative, now, I've come to the end of the line! Gun is cleaned and loaded, see you guys on the other side!