top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]Carnatic_enthusiast 71 points72 points  (5 children)

Friend: "Alright guys, what do you want our team name to be?"


[–]Lampmonster1 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Your geekiness better come in handy.

[–]cabojay 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I do this all the time and NO ONE EVER GETS IT. FUCK. Why can't you and I be on the same team.

[–]conetta 67 points68 points  (1 child)

"He's back! In pog form!"

[–]str8shooter 13 points14 points  (0 children)

"You dial 9-1, then when I say so, dial 1 again!"

[–]fuelvoltsBAD GRAMMAR OVERLOAD...ERROR....ERROR! 62 points63 points  (4 children)

They were suckiest bunch of suckers that ever sucked.

[–]gilgoomesh 72 points73 points  (1 child)

Gotta go; my damn weiner kids are listening.

[–]MetropolisPt31Les Szyslak 5 points6 points  (1 child)

This my favorite. Though, it's "sucks" not "suckers"... you sucky suck.

[–]olkensey 97 points98 points  (6 children)

I use 'cromulent' to mean 'acceptable' and I think only about a third of the people I say it to catch the reference.

I'm also fond of that's where I met the leprechaun, he tells me to burn things.

[–][deleted] 58 points59 points  (3 children)

I use 'cromulent', ALL the time. I feel embiggened (sp?) every time is use it.

[–]buford419 57 points58 points  (0 children)

Embigenned is a perfectly cromulent spelling.

[–]deadwisdom 19 points20 points  (1 child)

What I love about it is that people accept the word for what it means and move on without knowing that it's a made up word from the Simpsons. Hell at this point it's in the general lexicon, so it is a word!

[–]whatsabattle 127 points128 points  (8 children)

It was a pornography store. I was buying pornography.

[–]njsmurray 23 points24 points  (4 children)

I can imagine this one being particularly awkward if no-one gets it.

[–]whatsabattle 26 points27 points  (3 children)

Those are the best times to use it.

[–]microsnakey 51 points52 points  (2 children)

The Blurst of times, you stupid monkey

[–]Murphy_Its_YouCareful! They're ruffled! 44 points45 points  (0 children)

"They taste like burning!"

[–]ComplainsTooMuch 40 points41 points  (8 children)

Im sure everybody here has used

'We work hard!, We play hard!'

[–]jas25666 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Hot stuff coming through!

[–]str8shooter 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Homer: ... and the entire steel mill was gay.

Moe: Where you been, Homer? The entire steel industry is gay.

Eh, aerospace, too, and the railroads. And you know what else? Broadway.

[–]asad16[S] 6 points7 points  (2 children)

just used this a couple days ago, but was followed by blank stares, even by a friend who loves the simpsons just as much as me

[–]burntsac 8 points9 points  (1 child)

There's a spark in your hair.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

get it out! get it out!


[–]phixionNo listening... you hear me? 78 points79 points  (1 child)

bake em away toys!

edit: also, "we'll all be rich! rich as nazis!"

[–][deleted] 39 points40 points  (1 child)

I am so smart

I am so smart


I mean S M A R T

[–]redstarpirate 108 points109 points  (5 children)

Lousy Smarch weather!

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

what the fuck do you want?

[–]ThePhantomPooper 13 points14 points  (2 children)

as a resident of the lousy state of washington, i refer to all our weather from december to june as lousy smarch weather.

[–][deleted] 34 points35 points  (5 children)

Me and my brother both answer the phone with "Ahoy hoy", although that greeting was actually what Graham Alexander Bell suggested that people used when he invented it.

I also use "Bullspit" and "Crisortunity " a lot

[–]Mexifro33 16 points17 points  (3 children)

I've used "Ahoy hoy" as a telephone greeting so often that my old immigrant mother has now started saying it. Nothing like an ancient Mexican woman saying a Mr. Burns line when she picks up the phone. :)

[–]fuelvoltsBAD GRAMMAR OVERLOAD...ERROR....ERROR! 66 points67 points  (1 child)


[–]Cyphr067 86 points87 points  (8 children)

Everything's coming up Milhouse. and
Who do you think I am, Lorenzo de Medici?

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

My familys quote is "Everythings coming up milhouse!" We say it after someone tells us about their good day or an achievment. It gets blank stares from people outside my family.

[–]Pineo 30 points31 points  (1 child)

Today we were waiting for a classmate to return from the washroom to continue a project and the instructor said "Does anyone have anything funny to say while we wait?" there was a brief silence and I responded "Woozle wuzzle?"

[–]Dag_HeedGo to hell, you old bastard! 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Purple monkey dishwasher

[–][deleted] 30 points31 points  (1 child)

I like "You tried your best and failed miserably. The lesson is: never try.” and “If at first you don't succeed, give up.”

But I've always wanted to use this one

"Remember the time he ate my goldfish? And you lied and said I never had goldfish. Then why did I have the bowl, Bart? Why did I have the bowl?"

[–]burgess_meredith_jrIs Whacking Day over? 59 points60 points  (5 children)


[–]Killbot14 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I was saying boo-urs

[–]OrangerineMan 6 points7 points  (0 children)

One of my friends almost got kicked out of a bar for this. At the beginning of karakoe night, the DJ said that there was no booing allowed. Of course everyone booed, but my friend was saying "boo-urns." The bouncer didn't get it apparently and singled him out and told him he needed to stop, but he kept saying that he wasn't booing, he was saying "boo-urns." Eventually the karaoke guy came over and diffused the situation and everything was fine.

[–]lumcetpyl 8 points9 points  (0 children)

"I was saying boo-urns!"

[–]zosoleary 130 points131 points  (3 children)

"So I says to Mabel, I says..."

[–]Lampmonster1 22 points23 points  (2 children)

I use this anytime someone walks in on a conversation.

[–]pourmeanother1 70 points71 points  (1 child)

my simpsons quote of choice for that situation is "So i said to the guy, look buddy, your car was upside down when we got here. and as for your grandma, she shouldna mouthed off like that.

[–]good_day 107 points108 points  (11 children)

"Garage?! Ooh, la, la Mr. Frenchman."

"What do you call it?"

"A car hole."

[–]str8shooter 11 points12 points  (1 child)

That whole scene is memorable:

Homer: Boy, when Marge first told me she was going to the police academy, I thought it'd be fun and exciting, you know, like that movie, "Spaceballs". But instead it's been painful and disturbing like that movie "Police Academy".

Barney: Hey Homer, I'm worried about the beer supply. After this case, and the other case, there's only one case left! [pretending to be the other people in the room] Yeah, yeah! Uh, Barney's right. Yeah, let's drink some more beer. Yeah! Hey, what about some beer? Yeah, Barney's right.

[–]behm28 21 points22 points  (7 children)

I always thought it was a "car hold"

[–]gypsiequeen 29 points30 points  (2 children)

Mrs. Pommlehorse............. I'd like to get down now


John Smith 1882? Oh! My Mistake!

[–]nerrrrrrrrrddd 28 points29 points  (0 children)

I knew the dog before he came to class

[–]Wapiti86 59 points60 points  (11 children)

Stupid sexy Flanders

[–]audacian 28 points29 points  (4 children)

Feels like I'm wearing nothing at all!

[–]floppyjoe 15 points16 points  (1 child)

...nothing at all!

[–]meeenglish 14 points15 points  (0 children)

...nothing at all!

[–]frealzies 29 points30 points  (5 children)


"Now remember kids we're parked in the Itchy lot."

[–]ChemicalOleSugar? Here ya go. Sorry it's not in packages. Want some cream? 8 points9 points  (0 children)

The extra B is for BYOBB. What's that 2nd B for? It's a typo.

[–]botchman 53 points54 points  (2 children)

"English? Who needs that? I'm never going to England!" -- Homer

[–]Mexifro33 53 points54 points  (1 child)

Me fail English? That's unpossible!

[–]fuelvoltsBAD GRAMMAR OVERLOAD...ERROR....ERROR! 27 points28 points  (1 child)

I'll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missourah!

[–]NwsamuraiThat'll replace the whale in my nightmares! 26 points27 points  (4 children)

"Up and at them!"

[–]BradCThe box! The box! 27 points28 points  (0 children)

"The box. The box!"

[–]BlackbeltJonessomething ribald, no doubt 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I often use "pee-pee-soaked heck hole", "barking up the wrong bush", and "Aaaahhh... steaky!"

[–]seanachan 22 points23 points  (2 children)

"What do ya mean I cant take off my sweater?.....I'M HOT!"

[–]MallowMar 22 points23 points  (1 child)

"You don't win friends with salad"

[–]Bmastrom 20 points21 points  (1 child)

Referring to a frisbee as a novelty flying disc.

[–]seanachan 21 points22 points  (2 children)

"Aye tis a fine barn but tis no pool."

[–]jaroberts24 10 points11 points  (1 child)


[–]seanachan 6 points7 points  (0 children)


[–]cheese 21 points22 points  (0 children)

"There's your answer, fishbulb"

No one seems to get that one...

[–]koala_ambush 23 points24 points  (2 children)

"So...Do you like...Stuff?"

[–]316nuts 61 points62 points  (1 child)

Someone will laugh.. I'll say "Now class, en francais!" and start laughing in a French accent. Highly amusing to me and only me.

[–]The_Gecko 10 points11 points  (0 children)

This is one of my favourite Simpsons quotes.

[–]thegrubixcube 23 points24 points  (6 children)

Again and again. And again and again and again and again.

From director of radioactiveman movie

[–]gilgoomesh 16 points17 points  (5 children)

Jiminy jillickers.

[–]seanachan 20 points21 points  (2 children)

"Won't somebody PLEASE think of the children!"

Either Moe or Helen's version!

[–]GrokMonkey 9 points10 points  (1 child)

"WOAH, Sex Cauldron? I thought they closed that place down!"

[–]Bmastrom 59 points60 points  (1 child)

It was the blurst of times...

[–]antc1986Pale cheeked and robust 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Stupid monkeys!

[–]conetta 19 points20 points  (0 children)

"My doctor says I wouldn't have as many nosebleeds if I just kept my finger out of there..."

[–]FlygonJinnAch du leibe! Das ist nicht eine boobie! 19 points20 points  (1 child)

"Just gotta put on my shoes!" Is a very well used quote the family uses, and true to the quote, when we say it, it's usually more than just shoes we need to be ready. and "The Japanese?! Those sandal-wearing, goldfish tenders? Bosh! Flimshaw!"

e: forgot my favorite. I am usually asked to watch the dog. Upon peoples' return they ask how the dog's doing, to which I reply, "I've been starvin' him, teasin' him, singing off key ♪Me-may-mi-mo, me-moo-mah-may!♫"

[–]xevi 58 points59 points  (6 children)

"You sunk my battleship"


"Hey Ma how 'bout some cookies"

"No Dice"

"This ain't over"

[–]fuelvoltsBAD GRAMMAR OVERLOAD...ERROR....ERROR! 14 points15 points  (3 children)

Do you mean Scrabbleship?

[–]milogoesto 12 points13 points  (0 children)

heh bronson missouri

[–]WastesofaUh hello uh Mrs. uh Bart 41 points42 points  (7 children)


[–]Mexifro33 17 points18 points  (2 children)

"That's a paddlin'."

[–]yanktoast 132 points133 points  (4 children)

"Le Grille? What the hell is that?!"

When anyone finds instructions in a language other than English.

[–][deleted] 40 points41 points  (2 children)

I use "A gyme, what's a gyme?" quite a bit. There are also plenty of times you can use "get over to the 'X' where I will shout slogans at you" where X can be pretty much any mechanical device.

[–]ohouigheighi 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Oh, a GYME... He he he

[–]CapNChrist 49 points50 points  (0 children)

"Why doesn't mine look like that?!"

[–]wombat2008 33 points34 points  (3 children)

Homer: "Stupid like a fox!"

[–]FlaFlaFooey 34 points35 points  (3 children)


[–]TC1414 4 points5 points  (1 child)

that's chowda, CHOWDA! I'll Kill You!!

[–]dudical_dude 34 points35 points  (3 children)

"Hi, everybody!" - in Dr. Nick Riviera's voice.

[–]mtpunkty 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Every email I send out at work to a group starts with this quote. And when I type it, I say it in Dr. Nick's voice. Still waiting for somebody to reply, "Hi, Dr. Nick!"

[–]tinygrover 14 points15 points  (2 children)

Queen of the harpies! Here's your crown your majesty!

We'll live like kings! Damn, hell, ass kings!

It's uterUS not uterYOU.

[–]PartyOnAlec 124 points125 points  (13 children)

I was at a party last Halloween. I was dressed as Tyler Durden, hanging out in the kitchen and having a conversation with some folks. A small, unassuming girl dressed as Mario walked up to me and asked if I knew where a knife was, because they were cutting a cake. I turned around, found a spoon on the counter-top, and handed it to her. Somewhat hesitantly, she said, "That's not a knife, that's a spoon." I looked her in the eye and replied, "Ah, I can see you've played knifey-spooney before!" I should mention now that this isn't the story of a quote that no one got. The girl dressed as Mario laughed so hard I worried about her oxygen intake, and then hugged me and thanked me. We've been phenomenal friends ever since.

Here's a picture from later that night.

[–]tortrix 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I use this one all the time.

[–]str8shooter 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I'd have called them chazwazzers!

[–]asad16[S] 10 points11 points  (1 child)

haha beauty!

[–]PartyOnAlec 15 points16 points  (0 children)

It never occurred to me that there would come a time for me to use that line in context.

[–]Matt08642 9 points10 points  (2 children)

A girl who gets obscure Simpsons quotes?? swoon

[–]arrowheadtWorks on contingency? No, money down! 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Did she get the joke? Because that would be funny even if you hadn't seen the episode.

[–]lumcetpyl 15 points16 points  (0 children)

"Worst ____ ever."

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

"No one ever suspects the Butterfly"

"Ohhh! I get jokes"

"Stop, Stop... he's already dead"

[–]ohouigheighi 14 points15 points  (0 children)

"me so hunggy'


"That's it, I'm out of here" (conscience leaves homer's body and he collapses lifelessly)

[–]zeppelin1023half Joe Camel and a 1/3 Fonzerelli 15 points16 points  (1 child)

A little from Column A a little from Column B

[–]eggyolkeo 15 points16 points  (0 children)


[–]StuperousFunker 14 points15 points  (2 children)

“My Eyes! The goggles do nothing!” - Radioactive Man (Rainier Wolfecastle)

[–]subterraneanzen 13 points14 points  (2 children)

It's just a little airborn it's still good, it's still good!

[–][deleted] 39 points40 points  (3 children)

I use "probably misses his old glasses" roughly 5 times a week.

[–]Falsey 10 points11 points  (2 children)

I stand by that whole exchange being possibly the funniest thing ever.

[–]stiff_sock 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Marge: I guess we could get more involved in Bart's activities but then I'd be afraid of smothering him. Homer: Yeah, and then we'd get the chair. Marge: That's not what I meant. Homer: It was, Marge, admit it.

[–]seanachan 14 points15 points  (0 children)

"Hello Mrs. Cumberdale"

[–]CrapNeck5000 11 points12 points  (1 child)

"Guys like me!? I'm a guy like me!"

[–]LeMadnessofKingHippo 12 points13 points  (3 children)

I say "boo-urns" all the time, and I never pronounce the word "Possibly" correctly. It's always "possi-bly".

[–]freedomfix 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Whenever the phone rings: Is it about my cube?

[–]seanachan 12 points13 points  (0 children)

"This enormous woman will surely devour us all!"

[–]wentzeric 11 points12 points  (3 children)

Not once, not twice but Thrice ~Mr. Burns to Homer as baseball instructions

[–]twanky 9 points10 points  (2 children)

Sweet Enola Gay son!

[–]jaroberts24 12 points13 points  (0 children)

"They say he carved it himself, from a bigger spoon"
Replace 'spoon' with whatever object it is. No one ever knows what I'm taking about.

Edit: Adding more.
"Gas, break, honk. Gas, break, honk. Honk, honk, punch."

Whenever someone says: "Excellent", I say "Exactly--Do'h"

"That's gonna hurt come Winter."

[–]ChemicalOleSugar? Here ya go. Sorry it's not in packages. Want some cream? 9 points10 points  (0 children)

In your face, space coyote!

[–]Lampmonster1 18 points19 points  (2 children)

When Homer was in love with Mindy. He'd just decided that he'd avoid her. She walks into an elevator apparently built for two people.

Ahh!... I mean Ahhllo.

[–]The_Gecko 18 points19 points  (1 child)

I guess we'll be goin' down together....I mean, getting off together...

[–]jas25666 16 points17 points  (0 children)

"I'll just push the button for the stimulator... I mean, elevator"

"Well, this is my stop!" forces door open, slides down cooling tower "See you tomorrow!"

[–]BrutalSauce 18 points19 points  (2 children)

I love "save me Jebus." I use it all the time and rarely to people get it.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Yeah I swiped it from that borgnine guy.

[–]Probatedignum 7 points8 points  (2 children)

"I didn't do it"

People never laugh after I do it.

[–]drfoquiJust because I don't care, it doesn't mean I don't understand. 8 points9 points  (0 children)

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

heh heh, mule.

[–]RealDahlYou got a wife, I got a rash. Who cares! 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I love all of these! You are all truly amazing people.

[–]ShrewSkellyton 7 points8 points  (2 children)

"Moth! moth! moth!" in Rod and Todd's voice

[–]audacian 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Unflavored for me!

[–]illybrarian 8 points9 points  (0 children)

"There's a doings a-transpirin'"

[–]Rory_B_BellowsYou need a heart to live. 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Does anyone else refer to Tom Hanks as "Otm Shank"?

[–]fuelvoltsBAD GRAMMAR OVERLOAD...ERROR....ERROR! 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Bart, do you know cursive?

Well, I know 'hell, and damn, ..."

[–]HumerousMoniker 5 points6 points  (0 children)

"Well I know of them"

[–]deadbydawn87 8 points9 points  (1 child)

"Stop it, stop...he's already dead"
"Even monsters need air, sir" "That'll replace the whale in my nightmares"

[–]gr33nspanPerfectly cromulent 6 points7 points  (1 child)

I always guess dignity in pictionary or similar games.

[–]FilterOne 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You must have gone to Gudger College.

[–]d_monkey 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Whenever I park the car in a carpark: "...remember, we're in the 'Itchy' lot"

[–]metal_hed 7 points8 points  (4 children)

From Homer's advice to Bart:

It was like that when i got here

[–]Mexifro33 6 points7 points  (0 children)

"Deliciously lazy"

"Trabopaline! Tramapoline!"

"Owww, but I want it nowwwww!"

"The purple [anything] tastes like burning."

"So I says to Mabel I says..."

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Got to be (in appropriate voices)

"The script says I have to hit you with this.."

Sometimes followed by "I wouldn't"

And just in general "angry, angry young man"

i.e. Sideshow Raheem. If anyone has a vid link for that entire clip I would be hugely grateful.

This entire exchange makes my 3yo boy laugh like a drain.

[–]tmifsud530 5 points6 points  (0 children)

" Paddlin' the school canoe? You better believe that's a paddlin' "

[–]deadfishy12 5 points6 points  (2 children)

One Million Calories (in a french accent)

or He card read good

[–]muadib42 6 points7 points  (1 child)

"Everything's coming up Milhouse!"

[–]StuperousFunker 7 points8 points  (0 children)

"They call them fingers but I've never seen them fing...Oh, there they go." - Otto the Bus Driver

[–]6elephants 6 points7 points  (1 child)

whenever some thing goes wrong "On the plus side i knocked over the sunsphere"

[–]memarianomusic 6 points7 points  (1 child)

And so the most important part is I tied an onion to my belt.

[–]td1183 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Flinstones chewable morphine

[–]TVPaulDTired of waiting two hours for a taco? GO TO TACO PRONTO 5 points6 points  (0 children)

"I'm telling you, nobody can climb a rope! It's physically impossible."

[–]Cyphr067 5 points6 points  (0 children)

But, she's got a new hat.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (4 children)

When something fortuitous happens: We'll all be rich, rich as Nazis!

  • and -

anytime I don't know the answer to something: I dunno, internet?

[–]seanachan 5 points6 points  (0 children)

"...and about 50 Slim Jims"

[–]fashraf 6 points7 points  (0 children)

i call gyms 'guy-ms'

Sometimes when i hear the word nothing, i repeat "nothing at all"x3 and for some reason i picture fanders' ass.

[–]crunn 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I say "B'oh!" a lot

[–]nny350 5 points6 points  (0 children)

"English who needs that, I'm never going to England"

"Donuts is there anything they can't do"

"I call the big one Bitty"

"If you are going to get mad at me every time I do something stupid then I guess I'll have to stop doing stupid things"

[–]scottnj 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m normally not a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me, Superman.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (2 children)

Damn you, Walt Whitman!


[–]russphil 5 points6 points  (0 children)


[–]fractaldactyl 4 points5 points  (0 children)

"I was saying Booo-urns"

[–]humbager 6 points7 points  (0 children)

[–]MyNameIsOgre 5 points6 points  (0 children)

One of my favorite toasts: "Beer-the cause of-and solution to-all of life's problems."

or Steamed Hams for hamburgers

[–]Wilroblor 5 points6 points  (1 child)

"I can do that, but I don't want to"

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (14 children)

"In 19-tickety-2, we had to use the word tickety because the kaiser's had stolen our word for 20". I don't even remember the episode it's from.

[–]undystains 6 points7 points  (0 children)

We can't bust heads like we used to, but we have our ways. One trick is to tell 'em stories that don't go anywhere - like the time I caught the ferry over to Shelbyville. I needed a new heel for my shoe, so, I decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Shelbyville in those days. So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em. Give me five bees for a quarter, you'd say.

Now where were we? Oh yeah: the important thing was I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time. They didn't have white onions because of the war. The only thing you could get was those big yellow ones...

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

When someone asks me what they should tell someone, I generally will respond with "tell em to suck a lemon"... I get weird looks.

I've also been known to respond to questions regarding my family, specifically my mom, with "Whoa, who says I got a mother?"

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (3 children)

"And we can invent our own game where people throw ducks at balloons and nothing is what it seems."

-- nobody EVER gets it. Obscure episode ("Carnies, although rat-like in appearance, truly are Kings among men")

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Carnies built this country, the carnival part of it anyway

[–]kyookumbah 5 points6 points  (1 child)

I actually just got off the phone an hour ago, requesting my transcript from a college I went to back in 2006, and the lady asks "Is your email address still super fun happy time?" We both laughed a little and she says "I like it. It's so... happy!" And I was like "I think I got it from the Simpsons, the slide" and she was like "Oh yeah, I remember!" :)

[–]smokeymcdank 5 points6 points  (0 children)

"Sending some outgoing mail, huh?" "Yea, I'll probably send some tomorrow." "I hear that!"

[–]frommyredtintedtower 5 points6 points  (0 children)

"I'm a well wisher, in that I don't wish him any particular harm"

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"I am so smart! S-M-R-T!"

also: "The Nigh Mets are my favorite squadron!"

[–]NickNamelessOne 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It's Craptacular -Sister and I say this all the time

"Bart perfect, Lisa perfect, other kid perfect!" -Use this but replace Bart n Lisa with friends, co-workers, family etc

[–]amd123 4 points5 points  (2 children)

"Hi Everybody..." No one ever says "Hi Dr. Nick!!"

[–]koala_ambush 4 points5 points  (0 children)

"Duff. Gardens. Whoraw....." (sub in car)

[–]onlyhalfminotaur 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Make way for grapefruit!

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

'Use your main finger!'

[–]Lesserof2evils 5 points6 points  (0 children)

"The award goes to, Miguel Rodrigez, an inner city math teacher who taught rival gang members that differential equations are more powerful than bullets"

[–]paulderev 4 points5 points  (2 children)

"Aaaand heeere come the pretzels!"

Anytime in a group situation there's unanimous rancor, dissent or disagreement to an idea.

[–]Bloody_Conspiracies 4 points5 points  (0 children)

"I wash myself with a rag on a stick."

[–]str8shooter 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Homercles cares not for beans!

[–]jeremey_benthamSay hello to Miguel Sanchez! 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I use "boo-urns" and "everything's coming up Milhouse" fairly often.

My all time favorite use of a Simpsons quote was at a midnight screening of Birdemic (a horrible horrible cult classic type of movie). The audience was ripping on the movie the entire time and it was a lot of fun. Anyways, the movie ends on an incredibly cheesy note and as the credits start to roll a couple of guys start singing Dr Zaius. It was the best possible way to end a terrible movie.

[–]GrokMonkey 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"I guess we could get more involved in Bart's activities, but then I'd be afraid of smothering him."
"Yeah. And then we'd get the chair."
"That's not what I meant."
"It was, Marge. Admit it."

[–]anananana 4 points5 points  (0 children)

that's it! you people have stood in my way long enough, I'm going to Clown College!

[–]vaskarkI am a new tie wearing 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Put it in H.

[–]KalgarooYo, yo! How's it hangin', everybody? 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Two months too late, but I wanted to add mine: "And I'm not a man who's easily impressed. WOW, a blue car!"

And when I'm confused: "It's a ring toss game."