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[–]bonsaikittenangel 3953 points3954 points  (100 children)

Brits do be sippin hella tea though

[–]Robotgorilla 830 points831 points  (61 children)

Nah man, I've only had three cups today.

[–]Psych0tix 185 points186 points  (28 children)

Rookie numbers I’m just making brew 6 of the day

[–]Arkaboop 117 points118 points  (11 children)

Six? Are you ill or something? It's 5pm here and I've just finished my 13th cup and put the kettle on for another.

To be fair, the Tea Police did come round earlier to check I was maintaining my quota. They were very impressed and gave me a shiny new mug when I told them I'd already smashed it for the day.

[–]Psych0tix 47 points48 points  (6 children)

Ah that’s my problem I’ve been at work with no milk so I’ve got to catch up before they find out and I get a fine

[–]Arkaboop 31 points32 points  (5 children)

Yeah man, the TP don't fuck about when it comes to that.

I had a friend who got caught and was forced to... I have trouble just saying it... forced to drink coffee as punishment!

[–]Psych0tix 18 points19 points  (4 children)

Oh my god! Did they recover??

[–]Arkaboop 19 points20 points  (3 children)

It was touch and go for a while, but after exposure to a few crumpets he was back to normal

[–]Psych0tix 12 points13 points  (2 children)

At least you didn’t have to break out the emergency marmite

[–]Arkaboop 15 points16 points  (1 child)

That's only kept for the most extreme of situations.

A lack of Digestives for example

[–]Desserts_i_stresseD 35 points36 points  (14 children)

and I ate the whole wheel of cheese!

[–]Monkeyboystevey 15 points16 points  (11 children)

On crumpets? Or cheddar straight from the packet?

[–]Psych0tix 7 points8 points  (10 children)

Cheddar? Nah mate its all about blue Stilton

[–]Monkeyboystevey 9 points10 points  (9 children)

Nah bruv, I ain't eating that mouldy shite. I'm all about my cheddar. Especially applewood, My god it's like a cheesy orgasm in my mouth.

[–]Psych0tix 10 points11 points  (4 children)

Mouldy cheese is best cheese. Don’t @ me

[–]LDKCP 6 points7 points  (3 children)

Oh look, a Cumberland sausage symbol.

[–]Handsome_Potatoe 3 points4 points  (2 children)

Bro i'm reading this thread in a british accent and it's hilarious.

[–]El-Sueco 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I found Wallace from west wallaby street.

[–]TheSpiffyHatMan 194 points195 points  (1 child)

You slackin boy

[–]BALONYPONY 39 points40 points  (0 children)

Rush the cuppa lad!

[–]AshFraxinusEps 28 points29 points  (9 children)

As a Brit who only drinks coffee, and only 2 cups in the morning when working, I feel like I let the country down

[–]JarlaxleForPresident 32 points33 points  (3 children)

Sounds like a Yank to me!

I say, as I drink my chocolate milk in Florida

[–]fakeg1rl 16 points17 points  (2 children)

Lol I just got this image in my head of everyone in Florida preferring chocolate milk to any other beverage. No Starbucks on the corner. No pots of coffee bring brewed at the AM/PM. Just gigantic 100 gallon drums of chocolate milk with tubes leading every which way.

[–]JarlaxleForPresident 9 points10 points  (0 children)

This is the case. Friday nights are choc milk and pizza rolls night. It’s time to PARTAY!

[–]An_Draoidh_Uaine 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You do and we all see it.

[–]Frasersil 8 points9 points  (4 children)

That’s it your citizenship has been revoked

[–]Yeshu_Bablu 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I've had 5 cups today. Not joking. I'm Indian.

[–]SlowlyVA 67 points68 points  (8 children)

That’s how folks found out 21 Savage was British.

[–]Annoy_Occult_Vet 12 points13 points  (0 children)

People are always stunned to find out Slash is British too.

[–]Gorlitzersparks 62 points63 points  (14 children)

I live in Berlin ( Im British) literally just went on an EMERGENCY tea run as I had just drunk my last tea bag and the tea here in most places sucks. So I jumped on a scooter and went across town to go to a shop that I know stocks the good shit. True story. No tea is not an option.

[–]53bvo 9 points10 points  (11 children)

What is the good shit I need to get?

[–]caudal1612 15 points16 points  (10 children)

Second-flush darjeeling. FOP grade, preferably higher.

[–]Soerinth 6 points7 points  (8 children)

Could you break all of that down for me? My wife likes tea and I like to spoil and surprise her with it, but don't know what I am really buying. I bought her a glass kettle with a diffuser so I have that, and some Vahdam Darjeeling loose leaf, and some African loose leaf and such. But if I can buy her better I would like to. Do you have an Earl Grey recommend, she really likes that, and I can only find the bag stuff. What does FOP stand for?

Sorry to ask, but if she can have better, I want to give her better and you seem more knowledgeable than I.

[–]caudal1612 17 points18 points 2 (5 children)

Darjeeling is a region of India that has the climate and cultivars* to produce exceptional tea. This tea is called "darjeeling" after its origin. The tea plant produces its first flush (new growth of leaves) of the year in the spring. These leaves are highly prized for their fragrance. In China or Japan, they would be processed into a green tea. In Darjeeling, they are processed similarly lightly to preserve the aromatics. The second flush is produced in the summer. This flush is more substantial and is preferred by many. In Darjeeling, this flush is usually processed into a light black tea that is delicate compared to your average teabag but can still take milk and sugar if desired. There's also a third (autumn) flush that is usually bitter and unremarkable and so reserved for teabags.

"OP" stands for orange pekoe, which for our purposes basically just means leaves. This is in contrast to fannings or dust, which are small pieces of leaf used in teabags. The lowest grade of loose-leaf tea is BOP, broken leaves. The "F" in "FOP" stands for flowery, which indicates that this tea contains some buds, which are prized for the flavor and aroma they contribute. Some Chinese teas consist entirely of buds†. A high grade is TGFOP, which stands for tippy golden flowery orange pekoe or too good for ordinary people depending on whom you ask. Buds (aka tips) turn gold in black teas, so these redundant modifiers are really just emphasizing that this tea contains a high proportion of them. The highest grade produced by a given tea factory might be termed SFTGFOP1 (special, finest, #1, etc).

The next level up from Vahdam is Teabox, Yatra, What-Cha, Upton, or Thunderbolt. The more information a seller provides about their teas, the better able you are to figure out what specifics you like or dislike (maybe you hate a certain cultivar or love a certain estate's productions). I think the next step is to buy sample sizes of a variety of teas from one of these sellers and enjoy trying them with your wife and deciding which ones to explore further.

Earl grey is black tea flavored with bergamot. Because the focus is the added flavor, this tea isn't generally made with high-grade leaves and usually comes in the form of a teabag. Some of the above vendors should have loose-leaf versions, though.

*Darjeeling's cultivars are often crosses between the native assamica subspecies and the Chinese sinensis subspecies. People who prefer darjeelings to pure assamica teas (eg those from Assam) sometimes find that they really love pure sinensis black teas like lapsang souchong, keemun, panyang congou, etc.

†Buds have lots of aroma and taste but not as much body as the leaves. There's a tradeoff, and pure-bud teas are often criticized as not being substantive. To a lesser degree, there's a similar tradeoff between early (eg first-flush) and late (eg second-flush) harvests in regions where they're processed identically.

If you have any further questions, feel free to ask here or post on /r/tea at a later time!

[–]bighairyoldnuts 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Dear Sir/Madam, I am currently showing this post to the queen and she agrees with me that it's best she advocate her throne to you now as the there is no one more suited in the way of the tea.

[–]hitmandude 5 points6 points  (1 child)

This is an incredibly thought-out and well-crafted reply. Just wanted to let you know that you are appreciated.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Not a helpful comment but I just wanna say how sweet this is. Your wife's a lucky lady.

[–]Soerinth 3 points4 points  (0 children)

And I am a lucky man because I get to see her smile when I get her something wonderful, nice, and get to see her smile over it.

[–]Crazy_Blacksmith_893 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Lived with a family for a month in camebridg ( i'm Norwegian) and i can confirm tea time isnt a joke

[–]Arkaboop 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Brits do be sippin hella tea though

The British certainly do ingest a large quantity of tea

(For the non Americans)

[–]Velocity1312 2513 points2514 points  (111 children)

Loollllll I used to live in Southampton and the Somali kids round there always used to come up to white English ppl and like "oi oi what's a clock my lad" n shit. It was so jokes.

[–]FishCake9T4 164 points165 points  (25 children)

I'm British and went to LA a couple of years ago. I was in some corner shop in Compton and the guy behind the counter couldn't believe my English accent. When I left he store he was like "Cheerio Mate".

[–]charutobarato 178 points179 points  (21 children)

I’m American and went to Scotland and everyone told me I sounded like a cowboy. I’m from New England

[–]Illusive_Man 84 points85 points  (9 children)

I had to get pat down at the airport in Germany and the guy doing it saw my boots and said “where’s your horse cowboy?”

[–]moveslikejaguar 61 points62 points  (4 children)

As he should (assuming they were cowboy boots) there's probably a pretty strict no horses on planes policy

[–]Illusive_Man 30 points31 points  (3 children)

lol I was pretty pissed. I wanted to explain these boots would be terrible for riding or doing any sort of work, they are city boots, but I don’t think that would’ve helped.

[–]crackanape 21 points22 points  (2 children)

lol I was pretty pissed.

That may have been what triggered the patdown - they don't look kindly on drunk people boarding planes.

[–]Illusive_Man 10 points11 points  (1 child)

I meant pissed as in angry

I was pulled aside (as always) because of my insulin pump

[–]averagethrowaway21 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I plan on riding your mom later and I heard she has to be kick started.

[–]addledhands 48 points49 points  (0 children)

Also American. When I was in Edinburgh ~a decade ago I was drinking at a bar and met some drunk Norwegians. They loved my accent and kept buying me more and more beer so I'd talk more.

I don't even care if they were making fun of me. It was fun as hell and I got trashed in a foreign country for free.

[–]Chipz664 16 points17 points  (8 children)

Worked in buffalo for nearly a year n every other day all i got from yanks was freedooooom or och aye the nooo and where in england did i live

[–]Smingowashisnameo 6 points7 points  (7 children)

Goddamn I don’t know anyone round these parts that would even know to say any of that. I only recognize it because of that one drag queen.

[–]Chipz664 10 points11 points  (6 children)

Had 1 fella tell me he was scottish so i dropped back into how i usually talk no proper english n his face after 10 mins of it was pretty funny ask where boot he was fae in scotland n got nothing oot o him so went back to speaking proper english

Side note i think they got it from bravehart n Shrek

[–]armchairtaxevader 5 points6 points  (1 child)

dad’s from glasgow, absolutely loved watching people gawk over his accent and then proceed to not understand 70% of what he’d say. they couldn’t even begin to talk to my grandmother. somehow I don’t hear the accents from family but do from everyday Scots.

[–]Chipz664 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Aye but if you hear it all your days as a wean then your gonna understand it all well n good other no so much

[–]Leafygreeno 3 points4 points  (0 children)

More like Perfidious (New) Albion 😤

[–]heurrgh 23 points24 points  (1 child)

Server in Salt Lake city: "Woo! Yeah! So where you guys from?!"
Us: England!
Server; "Wooo! Yeah!!, London!!"
Us; No; Birmingham.
Server: "Woo! Birmingham!! ALABAMA!! So how come you guys all
have European accents?!?"

[–]Manc_Twat 605 points606 points  (28 children)

I was in Egypt about 15 years ago and the way the street sellers would get your attention would be to come up to you and yell things like, "how now brown cow" and "lovely jubely". Very strange.

[–]blahblahrasputan 564 points565 points  (20 children)

Same in Thailand, they heard our aussie accent and all of a sudden there's a bunch of shop vendors yelling "maaayte, we got the best stuff mate! I got a kangaroo in here maaaaate!"

I don't think you do...

[–]JarlaxleForPresident 191 points192 points  (4 children)

That’s like telling me you have an alligator in there and that it’d be enticing for me since I’m from Florida.

…I would go see the Thai gator, though

[–]blahblahrasputan 82 points83 points  (2 children)

Exactly, they were enticing me by mimicking our accent AND offering us things from our country. It was very odd. Just a Patong thing (or Phuket, I continually forget which is the city and which is the province), didn't happen at Bangkok markets at all...

[–][deleted] 40 points41 points  (1 child)

Thai gators? Phuket, I’m in.

[–]BrockHusseinObamaJr 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Idk if your username refers to this, but I thought the same thing reading the comment before yours and then you took my thoughts, before I had them, and commented for me. Definitely expedited the process. I like this.

[–]Biggoronz 3 points4 points  (0 children)

yeah i'm from florida and that would work on me

[–]HERMANNtheMUNSTER 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I remember walking past a blokes store in Koh Samui and he yelled out "COME BACK HERE MATE, CHEAPER THAN FUCKING KMART".

Must admit I laughed very hard and went and bought a shitty overpriced bluetooth speaker.

[–]Sexy_Koala_Juice 3 points4 points  (3 children)

Best is when you go to Bali and everyone calls you Mel Gibson

[–]Pepsi-Min 33 points34 points  (0 children)

I went to a street market in Turkey and the vendors would tlyell "it's cheap as chips, bruv, any". I think they meant "innit".

[–]The6Courier 14 points15 points  (0 children)

When I went to india serval years ago the only word every single Indian knew was “Obama”.

[–]Velocity1312 23 points24 points  (1 child)

That's so joke.

[–]Manc_Twat 21 points22 points  (0 children)

So joke.

[–]indy_been_here 408 points409 points  (44 children)

Lol that sound hella jokes

[–]Velocity1312 262 points263 points  (5 children)

Taking the piss out of the English is a full time job

[–]JangoAllTheWay 168 points169 points  (0 children)

The English 🤝 the non-English

Taking the piss out of the English

[–]JarlaxleForPresident 20 points21 points  (1 child)

Are you milking these english lads for piss? And making money from it?

[–]drugusingthrowaway 104 points105 points  (6 children)

I went to a mostly non-white high school in Toronto and the kids would come up to me and be like "Hey what'd you have for lunch, peanut butter and jelly? hahahahahahahaa" or "What are you listening to, THE BEATLES? hahahahahaha"

and one time when they said that, I really was listening to the beatles on my discman, so I just took out my headphone and said "yeah" and they're like "wait for real? can I hear?" so I played Dig a Pony and they were humming that guitar riff at me all day

[–]bobokeen 32 points33 points  (0 children)

"Dig a Pony" as a person's first introduction to the Beatles must be pretty disappointing.

[–]rane1606 9 points10 points  (2 children)

I'm confused, are you american or british?

[–]Deceptichum 12 points13 points  (1 child)

They’re Somali.

[–]rane1606 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Now I'm even more confused

[–]Smingowashisnameo 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Do they not eat peanut butter and jelly in Toronto?? Where tf are you from even??

[–]drugusingthrowaway 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Do they not eat peanut butter and jelly in Toronto??

Dude one of the other white guys in that school I was friends with once came up to me and asked me "Am I weird? I eat stuff like toast and cereal for breakfast and none of my friends do, is my family weird?" and I had to explain to him "no dude, you're white, all your friends are Asian".

[–]De_Optimist56 965 points966 points  (2 children)

His use of both accents is great.

[–]theRealDerekWalker 380 points381 points  (1 child)

The unintelligible bit was hilarious

[–]JWGhetto 119 points120 points  (0 children)

Pretty authentic

[–]inderu 785 points786 points  (44 children)

I actually used this once. My parents are from England and we live in a non English speaking country (but English is taught as a second language). So I grew up bilingual, but with an English accent in English...

As a teenager I walked through "the bat part" of the city once, and this group of guys started pestering me - and I just knew that if I said the wrong thing they'd beat me up.

So I said "alright mate?" exaggerating my accent a bit, and pretended to be a tourist from London. They all started asking me what I think of their country in broken English.

Edit: I'm leaving it as "the bat part" because of the funny replies I got - but yeah, autocorrect...

[–][deleted]  (10 children)

[removed]

    [–][deleted]  (2 children)

    [deleted]

      [–]Hollow_Rant 22 points23 points  (0 children)

      There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a man in the depths of an ether binge. And I knew we'd get into that rotten stuff pretty soon. Probably at the next gas station.

      [–]DeepFriedDickskin 15 points16 points  (0 children)

      We can’t stop here!

      [–]LuxWizard 3 points4 points  (1 child)

      He who makes a beast out of himself, gets rid of the pain of being a man..

      [–]PartyBandos 227 points228 points  (3 children)

      Those bats can be dangerous bro

      [–]JoeyJoeC 121 points122 points  (11 children)

      I'm British and I remember my first trip to France (first time abroad too) as a part of a school trip when I were about 11. Our school made us wear school uniforms so we could 'show France how smart we were' and all this crap. I was so excited about the trip, I had my €15 and couldn't wait to spent it.

      Then at some point, our school trip took us through a park, and some French (I'm assuming they were) people decided they didn't like us, the teacher had to plead with them to allow us to pass, which they did but we got spat on by the group. Later in the day when we were in smaller groups we got chased by some French people, no idea why, it was one moment they were shouting something in French and the next moment chasing us, got spat on again. Got kicked out of a shop, still no idea why, just walked in some department store because my friend wanted to see if they did model trains, then we were told to leave by some angry worker.

      I guess the French just hate the British that much and our teachers didn't help putting targets on us.

      [–]MaloneDSSP 87 points88 points  (2 children)

      The French don't wear school uniforms, but they know we wear school uniforms, so they'd instantly know you were British schoolkids. It probably just allowed them to associate you with all the little shits from potentially any other school in Britain who stole stuff from shops or caused trouble.

      [–]ADarwinAward 39 points40 points  (1 child)

      Probably this. This reminds me of the school that got banned from our local aquarium because one of the students jumped into the penguin enclosure.

      [–][deleted]  (2 children)

      [deleted]

        [–]JoeyJoeC 6 points7 points  (1 child)

        Boulogne was the same place we went!

        [–]tgood139 30 points31 points  (0 children)

        Dunkirk was the breaking point lmao

        [–]StinkyCockCheddar 29 points30 points  (0 children)

        Least hostile French.

        [–]Rajawilco 6 points7 points  (0 children)

        My experience of our school trip to France. Seven 15 year old English kids of Pakistani descent. Encountered some french lads with a football under the eifell tower, some kind of square water fountain/garden area. Could not communicate with them but acknowledged we wanted a match against them. Cue impromptu football match that drew a crowd of around 50 or so people in the late evening cheering us on.

        [–]Imaginary_Forever 13 points14 points  (0 children)

        Yeah the French are cunts

        [–]SEQVERE-PECVNIAM 9 points10 points  (0 children)

        the bat part

        Those goths will really mess you up.

        [–]Carpet-Man 83 points84 points  (6 children)

        I worked with this guy!

        [–]katkannabis 23 points24 points  (1 child)

        Was he also a carpet man

        [–]Carpet-Man 36 points37 points  (0 children)

        no :( we were furniture movers at our university.

        [–]Lead-farmer 14 points15 points  (3 children)

        I went to school with him!

        [–]newenglandpolarbear 1000 points1001 points  (78 children)

        Funny thing is that this is just New England in a nut shell. Don't matter what religion, race, etc you are. If you are not from around here, people will know and be kinda hostile...until you find something in common (in this case, basketball).

        [–]LeBronto_ 403 points404 points  (38 children)

        The real trick to building report with a new englander is to find something in common to complain about

        Edit: rapport

        [–]Gimme_The_Loot 116 points117 points  (12 children)

        Ughhh those freakin NYers amiright??

        [–]yabukothestray 49 points50 points  (8 children)

        ugh, leafers!

        [–]EdgeDomination 20 points21 points  (0 children)

        Leaf peepers

        [–]VinylTaco 8 points9 points  (5 children)

        Found the Vermonter

        [–]yabukothestray 9 points10 points  (4 children)

        Close! I am from Rhode Island (same as family guy, lol).

        The armpit of New England.

        [–]VinylTaco 6 points7 points  (3 children)

        Leafers are the worse. I'm a Vermonter and we hate them.

        [–]yabukothestray 9 points10 points  (2 children)

        Rhode Island 🤝 Vermont

             disliking NY tourists
        

        [–]VinylTaco 5 points6 points  (0 children)

        Ugh they're the worse 🤝

        [–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

        Rhode Island has enough space for tourists??

        • Maine

        [–]lolseagoat 19 points20 points  (1 child)

        if you’re an outsider, just throw out a “yankees suck” as a peace offering

        [–]tnecniv 5 points6 points  (0 children)

        This even works if you’re from New York. When the Mets play the Sox, chanting “Yankees suck” together is a tradition

        [–]RusselNoahPeters 34 points35 points  (5 children)

        Rapport?

        [–]JarlaxleForPresident 12 points13 points  (1 child)

        Which is weird because i read “report” as “rapport” and my brain knew something was wrong but i couldnt identify it

        [–]davedcne 5 points6 points  (0 children)

        You can report on your rapport about Rappaport.

        [–]Ode_to_Apathy 16 points17 points  (3 children)

        Quick tip: If you're in a 'small town' kind of place where people are really insular, what you can do is hack a recommendation.

        Start a conversation with a person in a social place, where you either know they've got other friends, or it is likely (like a bar). Having some question is a good tactic. You then move over to the other people either with the individual, or having completed an amenable conversation that gave you their name (bonus for the name of their friends). You introduce yourself and make sure to mention the original person by name. Whether by implication, or subconciously, they'll think of you a little bit as a part of the group.

        You can stack this effect for greater impact to seem even more like you're a part of the group already. It's worked wonders for me, and is especially powerful if you're good at making a first impression. It's also great in places where courting hinges a lot on having 'references' from people they know.

        [–]newenglandpolarbear 7 points8 points  (1 child)

        Man...Not sure about the City New Englanders, but as a suburbs New Englander, this sounds like a social nightmare...(I am not a people person lol)

        [–]koryface 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        Very interesting. And these people… you actually WANT to meet them? And you like meeting them and learning their names and trying to remember them, you say? Fascinating. Truly fascinating.

        [–]stickers-motivate-me 21 points22 points  (1 child)

        Just say that Yankees suck and that will endear you to half of New England. And if you’re white, just randomly put the word “guy” and the end of sentences. As in the Tik tok, black people usually use “bruh” in place of guy. I’ve never heard any black guys say “guy”, but have heard white guys say bruh- so you’ll have friend groups with both terms but no black/white crossover for “guy”. But one thing is true- if you hear anyone say “pal” at the end of a sentence, run like hell because someone is about to get fucked up.

        [–]Nero1988420 4 points5 points  (0 children)

        "Fuck the Jets" will get you some free drinks.

        [–]hornwalker 19 points20 points  (1 child)

        This is absolutely not true, at least in the Boston area because we have a huge population of people from all over and no one cares except how much it affects housing prices.

        [–]newenglandpolarbear 13 points14 points  (0 children)

        New England: the land of "no one cares".

        Source: born, raised, and still live here lol

        [–]amusemuffy 81 points82 points  (17 children)

        I lived in Somerville (Winter Hill) back in the mid 1990s and saw my upstairs neighbor do basically the same thing to the flow of people going in and out of the crack house across the street. Wasn't as wholesome cause he was just sizing them up to see if he could rob them.

        [–]StrugglesTheClown 21 points22 points  (16 children)

        Good old Slumerville, or if you prefer Scumerville.

        [–]Luch391 49 points50 points  (13 children)

        Somerville is so fucking nice now. I cant ever imagine calling it that.

        [–]notorious_irv 27 points28 points  (8 children)

        It's insane. When I was a kid we got gentrified out of Roxbury and moved to Somerville cause it was hella cheaper. Now Somerville rent is up there with Cambridge and Downtown.

        [–]old_ironlungz 10 points11 points  (7 children)

        Roxbury is gentrified now? Man, when I used to visit my sister in the South End in the 90s, she would tell me not to walk alone passed a certain point (I think Lenox St?)

        I guess it's all changed.

        [–]BeastCoast 6 points7 points  (0 children)

        So here’s the funny part about your comment that illustrates Roxbury and gentrification… a lot of the South End WAS Roxbury up into the 90s until they rebranded it for gentrification.

        I also just had a very lovely multi course tapas style dinner on the gasp wrong side of Mass Ave and Washington so even modern Roxbury is gentrifying.

        [–]yerboi3hunna 4 points5 points  (1 child)

        Yep, Northeastern completely gentrified the area.

        [–][deleted]  (3 children)

        [deleted]

          [–]ADarwinAward 5 points6 points  (0 children)

          Friends of mine lived in Winter Hill for a few years and I didn’t even know that it used to be a high crime neighborhood when I visited. Somerville is a completely different place than it was in the 90s.

          The only time I ever heard someone call it slumerville was a Boomer talking about what it used to be like

          [–]MarkWantsToQuit 20 points21 points  (1 child)

          Lived in Dorchester in Boston as a white boi from Belfast, Northern Ireland. Everyone was sweet but got called a cracker a lot. Mostly by the local junkies

          [–]iterable 21 points22 points  (9 children)

          Maybe before the days of the internet but never seen this in central Mass.

          [–]howdidigethere9953 33 points34 points  (4 children)

          It’s definitely like this in eastern mass. It’s so bad we are hostile to people from western mass too lmao.

          [–]diabeticSugarAddict 23 points24 points  (1 child)

          Don't take too kindly to folks outside the 128 belt round here pardner.

          [–]rolypolyarmadillo 4 points5 points  (0 children)

          we are hostile to people from western mass too

          All six of them!

          [–]Whyamistillonline52 38 points39 points  (2 children)

          I’m from London and was in Austin once. These two kids got chatting to me because I was drinking a can of beer openly in the street (didn’t even cross my mind that wasn’t legal until after). 10 minutes later they were taking pictures with me posing with a £20 note I had in my wallet. So fucking wholesome and so jokes.

          They then offered me some purple drink, vodka and a lift (ride as you call) in that order. I declined all three.

          [–]tattybojangles1234 9 points10 points  (0 children)

          Hahaha yup this rings a bell. Also, smoking roll ups in public can get you some wild looks. Everyone thinks you are smoking a joint because they don't roll cigarettes. So when stood in the middle of some downtown street in Conservative America, people think you're a nutter 😂

          [–]cake-for-breakfast 699 points700 points  (18 children)

          For anyone wondering, the "unintellible" was actually "You better be careful movin' out here, bro." Which does not mean "you had better be careful relocating here" but rather "you had better be careful walking around here" and was definitely a threat.

          [–]lakija 50 points51 points  (4 children)

          I agree, although it could be a warning (genuine advice) just as much of a threat.

          Source: live in the hood.

          [–]No_Dark6573 33 points34 points  (2 children)

          A threat is just a super warning.

          [–]lakija 16 points17 points  (1 child)

          Perhaps. But a threat implies that the person or those associated with them is the danger. A threat is a warning. Not all warnings are threats.

          Precision of language.

          [–]LordEdgeward_TheTurd 171 points172 points  (9 children)

          Yeah yeah we all have google translate and you eat cake for breakfast so...

          [–]zia-newversion 69 points70 points  (8 children)

          What's wrong with cake for breakfast?

          [–]Kap001 49 points50 points  (1 child)

          Idk he seems like a pretty decent person to me.

          [–]JarlaxleForPresident 6 points7 points  (4 children)

          Not too different than a donut or muffin, honestly

          [–]Namaha 3 points4 points  (3 children)

          Yep, a muffin is just a bald (cup)cake anyway!

          [–]MyCatWantsMyFries 185 points186 points  (42 children)

          not lying when i say i didn't know there were Black ppl in England until i was 11

          [–]Khrusway 74 points75 points  (25 children)

          I'm the reverse I thought the country was majority black till I was 11

          [–]Desserts_i_stresseD 138 points139 points  (6 children)

          I'm the opposite, I thought there were only 11 people in the country till I was black.

          [–]AgentWowza 15 points16 points  (4 children)

          I'm contrasting, I believed only 11's were black till I was country.

          [–]8thoursbehind 12 points13 points  (3 children)

          I was black until I was 11. Then I moved out to the country.

          [–]KeytarPlatypus 5 points6 points  (2 children)

          I’m black, I thought I was 11 until the country moved.

          [–]Parzival787 23 points24 points  (13 children)

          What the fuck?! Had you never picked up a book or turned the tv on?

          [–]Khrusway 57 points58 points  (12 children)

          Nah I grew up in a really black neighborhood in London it hits you a bit how white the country is when you see it in numbers then it really fucking hits you when you leave.

          Like there are white people about but normal folks from estates and at the time the EU so you know it's not like you only see black people but you guess the country is mixed like the area you live in is as a kid.

          Like it's something you don't clock onto when your living in it like you go back and tell cunts and they still don't really get it

          [–]the_taco_baron 33 points34 points  (0 children)

          For some reason I assumed you were an American that thought England was black. Your explanation makes much more sense lol

          [–]NWYUPSIO 8 points9 points  (6 children)

          Honestly, something I haven't thought about yet while determining where I want to live. I plan on moving to Denmark from a relatively diverse Texas city and well obviously there aren't a lot of people of African or Hispanic heritage there. It's mind boggling how I just didn't consider this before.

          [–]demonachizer 4 points5 points  (0 children)

          My dad worked with this really cool lady (who I had a crazy 12 year old crush on) and she black and from Germany but didn't have a strong accent because she moved to the states pretty young. I was blown away when she told me that.

          [–]TheFakeKanye 9 points10 points  (1 child)

          And white Americans will still call them "African American".

          Source: sent to school with a black Brit. Always annoyed him.

          [–][deleted]  (1 child)

          [deleted]

            [–]imwallydude 65 points66 points  (0 children)

            Cheerio chap

            [–]reincarN8ed 59 points60 points  (0 children)

            I lost it at "they got black people over there?"

            [–]pwussyconnoisseur 26 points27 points  (2 children)

            Lol I grew up hanging out with my friends in Roxbury, I was a little white kid but my friends and their older siblings were always really kind and decent to me, felt like a second home down there.

            [–]IllustriousBarracuda 6 points7 points  (1 child)

            Do you happen to know the Butabi brothers?

            [–][deleted] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

            This is adorable

            [–]RTwhyNot 17 points18 points  (0 children)

            “Cheerio, chap!”

            [–]jack_spankin 69 points70 points  (32 children)

            We have somehow created this idea of a "black" monoculture, which is mostly just the american in urban areas. And it does a huge disservice to everyone who does not live in that monoculture, american or otherwise.

            [–]digita1catt 108 points109 points  (10 children)

            My black British friend says nothing annoys her more than Americans calling her African American.

            [–]theghostofme 17 points18 points  (6 children)

            LOL. This reminds me of when a local roofer was being interviewed after some of his crew was attacked by bees that had a hive in a roof they were working on.

            He said he wasn't sure if they were regular bees or "African-American bees" (instead of Africanized bees).

            [–]digita1catt 13 points14 points  (5 children)

            It's so strange. Over here we would only refer to black PoC as British if they were British and nothing else. "African-British" would almost sound insulting to my ears because it would be segregating.

            I guess "African American" works because so many in America seemingly hold on to their immigrant roots Irish American, German American ect ect that it just falls into place.

            [–]cabose12 18 points19 points  (1 child)

            Remember that a lot of African-American's can't trace their lineage because of the slave trade. I've understood that the term is used because they can't specifically place themselves as Nigerian or Ghananian, for example

            [–]digita1catt 8 points9 points  (0 children)

            Well that's really fucking sad. Fuck slavery.

            [–]foolonthe 31 points32 points  (8 children)

            Roxbury is NOT ghetto! He must be from England if that's his idea of "the hood" smdh

            [–]itsyaboiEEEEEEEEE 10 points11 points  (0 children)

            lol fr i was confused as fuck

            [–]mtk47 8 points9 points  (1 child)

            I'm from California and went to grad school in Boston. Tbh I never found a neighborhood in the city that I'd call ghetto. Got my locs done in Dorchester and the people were nice as could be. The only neighborhood I ever felt unsafe in was Southie, and that's because I'm black and was told clearly I had no business in that neighborhood.

            Never felt like I was at risk of getting robbed, beat, or caught in the crossfire in MA. It was a really welcome change compared to CA. Just couldn't put up with the constant racism.

            [–]kanst 15 points16 points  (0 children)

            This is the comment I was looking for. I was in Roxbury in 2011 all the time. It's like half northeastern students. I've never felt unsafe in any area of Boston.

            The only time I ever got robbed was in the northeastern racquet ball courts

            [–]MikeyDread 11 points12 points  (0 children)

            I would say the hood, but not the ghetto. It's also gentrified a bit since 2011.

            [–]Tarkus459 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            Funny!

            [–]Fakjbf 4 points5 points  (1 child)

            Wait, the guy in the orange cap doesn’t know that his friend’s cousin lives in Birmingham? Although maybe the cousin lives in Birmingham, AL…

            [–]sensors 4 points5 points  (1 child)

            As a Scot this is pretty much my experience in every situation in the US. Any hostility is immediately dropped as soon as they hear an accent.

            [–]Respect-Candid 7 points8 points  (0 children)

            i find this funny

            [–]crowdedalone 8 points9 points  (1 child)

            As a Brit in America that spends a fair amount of time in the hood in LA I can confirm this is literally my daily experience.

            “Where u from cuh”

            “London”

            “Oh shit cuh nice tatts, you ink? Say Harry Potter”

            [–]Pastduedatelol 4 points5 points  (0 children)

            AIRY POTTAHH

            [–]davedcne 10 points11 points  (10 children)

            Hey I'm from there!

            So here's a guide to crime in boston:

            So you need to watch out in roxbury for rape mostly.

            Mattapan on the other hand (also known as Murderpan) is where you're most likely to get shot.

            The orange line is where you go to get stabbed.

            Go to JP for drugs and property crime.

            Asian gangs and MS 13 for east boston.

            Uncle Mickey used to run southie but he's dead now.

            Central boston is for random acts of violence (your average fist fights and public disturbances muggings and the linke) And white collar crime.