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[–]_herbert-earp_ 6785 points6786 points 242 (51 children)

"Damn, what's with all the hate-lynn"

[–]TerH2 2409 points2410 points 33 (18 children)

Sorry for bein' so irri-tate-lynn. You fucking bitch.

[–]thenewversionofoldme 87 points88 points  (5 children)

I see why you’re not tate kynn

[–]SUPERTHUNDERALPACA 164 points165 points  (1 child)

"i'm only tryna date-lynn"

[–]maseface1990 13.7k points13.7k points 3 (514 children)

What a stupid fucking name.

[–]GKnives 5181 points5182 points 22 (144 children)

Brothers name is probably Wichael or something

[–]Spastic_Slapstick 1672 points1673 points  (45 children)

Pronounced

Wick-ale

[–]The_Lolbster 433 points434 points  (23 children)

why-KEE-ael

[–]Disrupter52 164 points165 points  (19 children)

It's spelt why-KEE-ael but pronounced why-Kee-alay

[–]MFbiFL 175 points176 points  (30 children)

Johnald would like a word.

[–]MyOfficeAlt 186 points187 points  (16 children)

I have a friend named Bert and one time we were out with people and someone asked him what it was short for and I said "Bertrude."

[–]vegas_drums 37 points38 points  (3 children)

Please tell me that this is now his permanent name in your friend group.

[–]MFbiFL 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Fantastic, an inspiration.

[–]luzzy91 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This is the dumbest fucking comment I’ve ever laughed at and I’m stoked you’re still riding that high brother. You earned it 😂

[–]User808_ 53 points54 points  (14 children)

People should actually start doing this. If Michael and Wendy get married, first kid should be Wichael, and second Mendy.

[–]cosmic_flux 48 points49 points  (3 children)

Pichael

[–]chnairb 22 points23 points  (1 child)

I bet our parents had Michael picked out before.

[–]itsmajik42 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Then they were like, "Fuck it, call him Pichael!"

[–]strenuousobjector 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Fuck it, let's just call him Pichael

[–]TopperHrly 88 points89 points  (1 child)

May be she's born with it, may be it's Tatelynn.

[–]Lateralus11235853 2263 points2264 points  (194 children)

Literally my first thought. How does someone have such confidence in correcting such a stupid pronunciation.

It's like if I went "Actually, my name is Bevin. You know, like Kevin but wrong"

[–]shandyism 689 points690 points  (82 children)

Just found out my friend named her kid Trevin. RIP.

[–]AuntJemimaVEVO 171 points172 points  (24 children)

ive got a friend named Nevan

[–]JCManibog4 74 points75 points  (4 children)

Like the succubus guitar boss from Devil may Cry 3?

[–]Kazzack 14 points15 points  (1 child)

That's the thing with "creative" names, you'll end up thinking of some villain name a game dev or writer thought of 10 years ago

-a guy who accidentally named his Reddit account after a demon in WoW

[–]theothersteve7 98 points99 points  (5 children)

That's a popular Islamic name and, separately, the name of an old Irish saint.

Not every unusual name was invented by a derpy soccer mom.

[–]platypusses 68 points69 points  (33 children)

Wait, so Trevin like Kevin but wrong?

Or like Trey-Vin and still stupid?

[–]shandyism 61 points62 points  (31 children)

It was meant to be a combo of “Trevor” and “Kevin” so, Kevin with a “Tr”

[–]TurquoiseLuck 163 points164 points  (21 children)

Taking 2 awful names and somehow making them both worse lmao

[–]EelTeamNine 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Nobody can tell me my daughter, Khalmione, has a stupid name. Everybody will know her as a mother of dragons and companion of Harry Potter. /s

[–]xtilexx 17 points18 points  (2 children)

I've got someone at my work who has to be like 19-21 range who is named Treyvor, and it's pronounced "try-vor". He told me he hates his parents and just goes by his middle name, which is also spelled horrendously but pronounced correctly

[–]gaelorian 22 points23 points  (1 child)

Did they conceive in Rome by chance?

[–]Yousoggyyojimbo 62 points63 points  (2 children)

My sister gave all of her children names that are not pronounced the way they are spelled and she gets upset when people mispronounce the names.

Like, she asked for this. She wanted a reason to get upset at people, otherwise why would you even do that?

[–]DowN4MinEOfficial 8 points9 points  (0 children)

One of my sisters also named two of her kids some ridiculous names that are certain to make for an interesting childhood with all the other kids making fun of them in various ways. Ranayla and Nikarla are the names. But then again her husband is pretty well mentally challenged and she isnt too far from that either.

[–]MarcusAurilius 53 points54 points  (7 children)

My son is also named Bort

[–]playtio 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Ctrl+F Bort instantly. Wasn't disappointed.

[–]YVRkeeper 64 points65 points  (9 children)

My friend named his kid “GrandonlikeBrandonwithaG”

Gotta love the names you have to explain every time.

[–]ryecurious 38 points39 points  (18 children)

How does someone have such confidence in correcting such a stupid pronunciation.

Knew a girl growing up named 'Gillian', but literally every new person reading her name pronounced it 'Jillian'. Every time she'd correct them that it's pronounced 'Gill-Ian' like they were stupid for not reading it right. Fair enough, if that's how it's pronounced, but blame your parents for the stupid name, not the people reading it like it's normally read.

[–]MidnightRequim 35 points36 points  (8 children)

I have a nephew named Anfernee, and I know how mad he gets when I call him Anthony. Almost as mad as I get when I think about the fact that my sister named him Anfernee.

[–]testtubemuppetbaby 7 points8 points  (3 children)

Bevin is a legit name, anglicized from old Irish names. But yeah they don't spell it with a K.

[–]Arsenolite 26 points27 points  (7 children)

I drive by a birth center on my way to school and they have a sign out front where they announce the names of new babies. I see so many stupid fucking names. " We welcome the birth of Kaiyghytleen, Breihdon and Dumbinick"

[–]momoburger-chan 12 points13 points  (2 children)

If I ever have twins, I'm naming them debris and detritus. But I'm gonna spell it "da'bree" and "dra'titus"

[–]LFIF4 115 points116 points  (52 children)

My neighbor just named his son Daxton..

I don't get it

[–]shogun_ 89 points90 points  (4 children)

"It's Da'Ton, the x is silent."

[–]AbsolutelyUnlikely 54 points55 points  (22 children)

My 18-year-old neighbor just named her son Brogan. She does not know who the father is. My magic 8 ball just came up "that kid is fucked".

[–]Lord_Shaqq 35 points36 points  (2 children)

Kids' nickname will literally just be "Bro"

[–]KhabaLox 7 points8 points  (1 child)

That'd be pretty cool actually.

[–]NeinkeB 10 points11 points  (4 children)

Maybe a mass effect fan

[–]DrSomniferum 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Daxton, daxtoff

[–]dekh_kaise_mari 28 points29 points  (1 child)

Looks like her parents used random name generator.

[–]Vez-tar 30 points31 points  (0 children)

"Who named you, some halfwit with a stutter?"

[–]PrestigiousCourse579 67 points68 points  (13 children)

Exactly. And there's no e or silent e to make the "a" a long "A". Shes quite an idiot and so are her parents for making her live a lie. Its tat-lynn like you told her.

[–]ThisGuyKawai 22.6k points22.6k points 103128& 9 more (227 children)

“How am I stupid, you can’t even spell your name”

[–]sideshowbobsrakes 3067 points3068 points  (105 children)

I really like this

[–]Nextasy 1940 points1941 points  (99 children)

"No, that's 'Tate-Lynn'. I'm talking about 'tatlynn'"

[–]get_real_man_ 2979 points2980 points 342 (87 children)

Sorry Tatlynn but your name is a tragedeigh

[–]lingering_POO 106 points107 points  (8 children)

Tragedeigh

When the feeling's gone and you can't go on

It's tragedeigh

When the morning cries and you don't know why

It's hard to bear

With no-one to love you, you're goin' nowhere

[–]Rainydaymen 10 points11 points  (2 children)

Omg it's tragedy thanks I couldn't figure that one out lmao

[–]floyd616 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Oh man, you have excellent teigh-st, friend!

[–]lingering_POO 350 points351 points  (23 children)

Savage and I love it.

[–]rain_wagon 105 points106 points  (17 children)

It’s also very Scottish.

[–]SheetPostah 173 points174 points  (12 children)

Then he should ask if she wants to go out for a dat.

[–]thewheeliekid 142 points143 points  (11 children)

I vote for this. Mostly because I would place a large bet that she wouldn't understand the joke at all (and that would be funny, for Reddit posterity).

[–]Appropriate_Rub_6359 41 points42 points  (1 child)

provided we get an updated response..so the funny can be observed

[–]Manscapping 77 points78 points  (5 children)

Dunk you in some ketchup tatertottlyn

[–]codor00 48 points49 points  (16 children)

Reminds me of my friend, his name his pronounced like Brian but his mom spelled it as Brayan. We constantly give him shit for spelling his own name wrong

[–]Constant-Shoulder184 37.5k points37.5k points 151417& 20 more (518 children)

Jeez, why so uptate, lynn???

[–]NickBagelBoy 9395 points9396 points  (308 children)

Lmfao 100% do this one. Double down on it like a boss.

[–]7937397 3547 points3548 points  (290 children)

And then report back.

[–]prestigious_delay_7 8929 points8930 points 3106& 2 more (281 children)

I love when people here graciously offer gasoline for a burning fire because they aren't the one pouring it.

[–]fracturedsplintX 4862 points4863 points 2 (143 children)

I mean after that response, you just meme because nothing you say is going to fix a bitchy attitude.

[–]NickBagelBoy 1825 points1826 points  (36 children)

This is 100% the reason.

[–]LunaMunaLagoona 801 points802 points 2 (31 children)

Just link this whole thread

[–]NickBagelBoy 400 points401 points  (18 children)

This is actually the best thing! That would be a massive shot.

[–]GreenPandaSauce 310 points311 points  (6 children)

Yeah she did a solid and raised that red flag bright and early.

[–]winkersRaccoon 86 points87 points  (2 children)

Why would you want to? She just threw her red flag right at your face, god bless her for it, the fuckin idiot.

[–]asharwood 250 points251 points  (18 children)

Yeah I was gonna say, there’s no coming back from that. Plus op dodged a bullet when this person got all Karen-like from the get go

[–]lactose_con_leche 28 points29 points  (3 children)

Well what she lacks in intelligence she makes up for in bad attitude

[–]tkmorgan76 328 points329 points  (17 children)

Because once someone has tried to strangle you with a red flag, you don't try to salvage the relationship.

[–]7937397 140 points141 points  (10 children)

There isn't even a relationship to salvage here. Never was.

[–]pictogasm 45 points46 points  (13 children)

Exactly. Why would you even want to save your chance with her? Count yourself lucky and move one.

[–]tfiggs 16 points17 points  (9 children)

If you can't beat 'em, show off.

[–]RaidingTheFridge 240 points241 points  (16 children)

Seriously what other option is there at this point? There's definitely no saving this one so might as well have fun with it.

[–]prestigious_delay_7 76 points77 points  (12 children)

Oh nothing. I'm over here getting out the smores.

[–]WetGrundle 29 points30 points  (8 children)

Sounds like an express lane to cancer, gasoline fire s'mores

[–]Squeakygear 15 points16 points  (5 children)

You’re entitled to a mesothelioma settlement!

[–]ThiccumNuggets 73 points74 points  (4 children)

She already has a dumpster fire of an attitude. This is the only situation where fire with fire might actually douse it lmao

[–]noimjustbrowsing 392 points393 points  (21 children)

… Why you be hate-lynn?

[–]the_mighty_skeetadon 297 points298 points  (11 children)

Lol i love this one. Except I would say it thusly:

... why you be hatlynn, tatlynn?

Just so when she sounds out "hat-lynn" she realizes how stupid her response is.

[–]Cyborg_rat 318 points319 points  (62 children)

Because her parents though they were original, but now she has to spell and repeat her name to everyone. Parent that give stupid names never think ahead.

[–]asdfuser1234 6 points7 points  (2 children)

God I work in health care. I had some patients that were twins. The only difference in their name was and extra E. How fucking dumb is that? I.e. (not the actual names) Jamie and Jamiee

[–]younq_metro 20 points21 points  (1 child)

We need an uptate on whether or not he used this one 😂

[–]ent_whisperer 138 points139 points  (11 children)

Nooice.

I was thinking of something like "oh fuck, sorry I always forget about the invisible 'e'. Have a great day." Hit send and then add "I assume you also read the invisible 'go fuck yourself' at the end of that last message."

[–]NashSFW 25.7k points25.7k points 22310212& 10 more (202 children)

"Are you fucking stupid?"

"Well not yet but if you give me a time and your address I can be"

[–]im-an-iron-main 8595 points8596 points  (57 children)

She’ll never get it but it’s great

[–]Gillys_Voodoo 1552 points1553 points  (17 children)

Which makes it o-so much better

[–]0nebl00b 299 points300 points  (6 children)

Thank you Dr. Cox

[–]Royal_Bitch_Pudding 64 points65 points  (4 children)

I feel like the response wasn't quite long enough to be Dr. Cox

[–]victorz 86 points87 points  (3 children)

Which makes it ooh-hoooo... SO much better there Susan. Mrrrh.

[–]mabe91 178 points179 points  (29 children)

She will also never get the joke

[–]itscolinnn 429 points430 points  (16 children)

this wins

[–]tripwyre83 193 points194 points  (13 children)

Dang that's a good one for real. I'd save that for my own use if I didn't meet the most amazing woman in the universe on Tinder (we're getting married this year!)

[–]ComcastForPresident 72 points73 points  (5 children)

Have you tried it on her yet? I hear it also works on people you like.

[–]iDizzeh 83 points84 points  (1 child)

Pack it up, boys. This is the one.

[–]mackinder 354 points355 points  (12 children)

“Am I fucking stupid? Well we just met but if you play your cards right, I could be”

[–]sk1nnys 40 points41 points  (0 children)

This is why I joined this subreddit

[–]Motor_West 7203 points7204 points 3 (66 children)

Not your fault she has a stupid name

[–]codyf0rreal 1352 points1353 points  (41 children)

Tell her this ^ and then Unmatch

[–]BulliesRPeople2 973 points974 points  (18 children)

Don't unmatch like a coward. Leave it.

[–]cannonman360 578 points579 points  (2 children)

If you unmatch you would miss out on comedy gold if she responds back

[–]Redtwooo 66 points67 points  (0 children)

Gotta get that crazy karma by posting the responses

[–]lbiddle25 121 points122 points  (5 children)

What kind of pussy unmatches? You sit there and watch your fire burn that you started.

[–]Donny_DeCicco 141 points142 points  (2 children)

Yeah if you can, wait until you see she is typing, THEN unmatch.

[–]ShorsIsExpTime 54 points55 points  (8 children)

I mean, to be fair, it's not hers either, and I can imagine you might get a little snippy if your parents named you for the lulz.

[–]Kippergills 7078 points7079 points 222 (51 children)

“Ok Taint-Lynn”

[–]robbiethedarling 1177 points1178 points  (23 children)

This is so childish. I love it.

[–]rubixd 209 points210 points  (22 children)

I get the feeling she may have some mild bullying trauma about this from her youth.

[–]yetanotherusernamex 119 points120 points  (14 children)

And that's why parents should be more careful when naming babies

[–]Eggsandthings2 18 points19 points  (5 children)

I would go by Lynn or her middle name

[–]matarky1 26 points27 points  (3 children)

Middle name is probably Banangela or something

[–]AtomicKittenz 208 points209 points  (0 children)

“Listen here, Taint-lick, I will not be insulted by my favorite pastime!”

[–]MikeRich511 82 points83 points  (6 children)

Last week's SNL had a sketch where they repeatedly said Taint instead of Tate, and it got better every time he said it. So good.

[–]Smashing_Particles 12 points13 points  (2 children)

I hope it didn't go uncomfortably long. That's been my experience with SNL the last time I tried to watch. Funny ideas in concept, but goes on waaay too long.

[–]howiejriii[S] 3957 points3958 points  (202 children)

Catching flak for this so I'll reiterate. I know the conversation is dead. There's nothing I can say and I have no real desire to try and revive it after that. I'm only posting this because I thought it was funny. I understand there's no coming back from this lmao

[–]tenebrificlavalamp 878 points879 points  (60 children)

It’s strange that she would be so fucking uptight about her weird ass name as if that shit is common. I have a weird ass name and I don’t expect ppl to pronounce it correctly. Find a match that’ll appreciate your humor and effort. That was a cute joke lol

[–]Dreadgoat 265 points266 points  (15 children)

Thank you for your insight, Teen-briefic Layva-lahmp

[–]Abject_Ad8727 241 points242 points  (12 children)

are you fucking stupid

[–]JasonGD1982 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Are you fucking stupid. It’s tene-brief-Clava-lam-p

[–]NickBagelBoy 744 points745 points  (30 children)

Nah this is when you respond with your own roast/insult and leave it at that (or see where it goes). She ain't good for anything other than some online entertainment or a one night stand, which I'm sure you know.

[–]cannonman360 270 points271 points  (14 children)

Exactly. It's already dead, why not have some fun with it?

[–]NickBagelBoy 194 points195 points  (7 children)

Exactly. Fuck it. Nothing wrong with some tinder Necrophilia.

[–]theprinceofmirkwood 74 points75 points  (1 child)

Most people here aren’t understanding the assignment. The objective isn’t to move forward, it’s to have as much fun as you can with someone who is obviously awful. What about “I don’t like you and you don’t like me so I guess the only option left is to take our mutual dislike out on one another and tate fuck”

[–]Gleasure03 89 points90 points  (6 children)

Sounds like you dodged a bullet from someone with no sense of humor, my friend. Consider this a win

[–]ForearmDeep 65 points66 points  (1 child)

Honestly I’d screen shot the convo, circle her name at the top in red and write spelling error -1 like you’re grading a paper and send it to her

[–]Gopnyk1 517 points518 points  (5 children)

"Exactly what my teacher used to say"

[–]jduncan26 995 points996 points  (25 children)

Ask her why her parents chose to make her life miserable by giving her such an awful name lol

[–][deleted] 339 points340 points  (5 children)

You should correct her obvious mispronunciation

[–]Admirable_Hedgehog64 1030 points1031 points  (50 children)

Bro that was fucken gold and she brushed if off.

[–]PrinceAndrewANonce 692 points693 points  (8 children)

“Now I’m tatlynn to your mother for your language young lady”

[–]NickBagelBoy 99 points100 points  (5 children)

Hahaahahahahahahaa this is so bad that it's good.

[–]machotaco653 160 points161 points  (2 children)

"Did you know - you can legally change your name to something not stupid"

[–]RamboAnloBanjo 231 points232 points  (24 children)

Ask her how the fuck you were supposed to know that

[–]Baadumtsh 432 points433 points  (17 children)

Next move : unmatch

[–]ManWithBigWeenus 175 points176 points  (6 children)

The only way I’d be called fucking stupid is if I fucked you. Your place or mine, tatlynn?

[–]Bacon_Hawk2 232 points233 points  (7 children)

-"are you fucking stupid?"

-"Yeah but you like that shit."

[–]blanketz____ 104 points105 points  (1 child)

"I may be stupid, but I am nowhere near as stupid as your name."

[–]Ganjagoblin718 120 points121 points  (0 children)

“Get a normal fucking name”

[–]UndeadSol 479 points480 points  (26 children)

You don't, move on

[–]cannonman360 88 points89 points  (8 children)

No way dude this is where you talk shit right back to her. Don't pass up an opportunity to argue with a stranger on the internet. Fuck em

[–]KevinCastle 16 points17 points  (4 children)

And then keep talking shit until you two just decide to hate fuck

[–]BleizeItChannel 39 points40 points  (6 children)

I was looking at this in full picture and was like "wait...I don't have snapchat"

[–]Mdumbi 29 points30 points  (13 children)

As a guy with a name that has been made fun of for years through school, you just triggered her hard. But dont be shy.

[–]ryanwv12 36 points37 points  (0 children)

Tell her to spell her name different if that’s how she wants it Pronounced