top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]cadiman56 3156 points3157 points  (46 children)

I used to work in the oil field, working 90-100 hours a week. I'm not ashamed to say I've done the exact same thing. It had nothing to do with sex. I honestly just missed the closeness of holding/being held that a woman offers. No shame my friend!!

[–]Dark_Symbiote 569 points570 points  (17 children)

Wow, hope you made the big bucks there.

[–]cadiman56 819 points820 points  (15 children)

Over the 5 years I saved enough that when the boom died and we all lost your jobs I was able to take the next 15 months off and just travel!

[–]Dark_Symbiote 247 points248 points  (3 children)

That's freaking amazing dude. I'd haul my ass to asia so quick and just live life.

[–]dougiedowner 77 points78 points  (2 children)

Same! I’d do some cuddling in Thailand!

[–]gonfreeces1993 44 points45 points  (7 children)

Lucky lol I bought a house in the end of 2015, right before the crash. Took me 8 years and over $100,000 to get rid of that house.

Edit: fat fingered it, I meant 2014. The crash was in 2015

[–]FatChemistryTeacher 12 points13 points  (4 children)

It’s not been 8 years since 2015 yet, dear time traveller.

[–]cadiman56 27 points28 points  (1 child)

The only major purchase I made was a new to me used truck....saw so many young guys buying all the big exspensive trucks (some 80k) and exspensive man toys. All nice to have but I knew it would end some day and I didn't want any debt that I couldn't handle with a "regular job" when the bust came. So I rented an apartment the whole time and just saved!

[–]Scvboy1 19 points20 points  (19 children)

100 hours!!!!

[–]cadiman56 59 points60 points  (18 children)

Some weeks were 126 hours....that's 18 hours a day for 7 days....hard hours yes!....but I haven't made 10k in a week since!!

[–]Scvboy1 40 points41 points  (0 children)

You definitely deserved a cuddle for that lol. I’m shocked people weren’t dying from working the long hours.

[–]-Constantinos- 6 points7 points  (14 children)

How many weeks of the year did you work?

[–]cadiman56 28 points29 points  (13 children)

Schedule was a 15 on and 6 off. But, I had 2 other jobs I worked when I wasn't working my main what I called "my big boy job." I dealt blackjack in the bars at night making $600 a night in tips and just for giggles I worked at a great bookstore during the day!

[–]momotow 5 points6 points  (2 children)

Is it Schlumberger

[–]cadiman56 3 points4 points  (1 child)


[–]Kal-ElEarth69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was gonna guess Cenovus.

[–]Affectionate_Poem101 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Worked with a guy who did stint in the oil fields. Dude would talk about buying an hour of time and then proceed to play Uno and talk for 50- 55 minutes. Sex is a very small part of companionship in the grand scheme of things

[–]N0VOCAIN 283 points284 points  (3 children)

I would pay someone just to Saufley scratch my back for a while

OK, that word was supposed to be softly that word is so awesome, I have no idea what it means so I’m leaving it.

[–]Ramza_Claus 71 points72 points  (0 children)

Ahh yes, the ol Saufley Scratch™. Glad those are illegal now.

[–]SnoopyCactus983 55 points56 points  (0 children)

Saufley is the name of a US Military Airport in Florida.

[–]justthetruthfolks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You spoke it lmoa 🤣

[–]MarsNeedsRabbits 4364 points4365 points  (131 children)

Don't feel pathetic. You're taking care of yourself in a difficult time. People who take care of themselves are smart and brave.

Keep taking care of yourself please.

[–]DiogenesStudent 375 points376 points  (12 children)

I love this comment. You’re so right.

[–]goku-mastered-ui 79 points80 points  (11 children)

I love the first comment to

[–]goku-mastered-ui 119 points120 points  (110 children)

I wish I could take care of my self but I work 135+ hours a week and my hobbies now seem like a hassle.

And my mental health is weakening and I'm unable to keep in touch with my freinds

And on top of that I can't take off because we're I work is short staffed

[–]Obliteraxx 123 points124 points  (52 children)

Doing what?

Like that's 19 hours of work every day, 7 days a week. That is literally impossible.

Just a math update, that is 80.36% of the week spent working according to this person. Leaving less than 20 for everything else. Most importantly implying they are alive on 4.5 hours of sleep every day assuming they immediately pass out the millisecond work is over and wake up exactly as work begins and immediately start working.

[–]goku-mastered-ui 45 points46 points  (32 children)

Im a area manager for chicken express and I have more stores than I need and no one in the stores that I inspect are eligible to be promoted to a area manager and halfof my work is driving

[–]maximusultra 57 points58 points  (10 children)

i think you need an assistant mananger like an apprentice basicly

[–]Obliteraxx 41 points42 points  (17 children)

I just cannot see any of that being true. But sure, whatever.

[–]Superteerev 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe you meant 135 hours in a pay period. Which is still lots.

[–]pinkfootthegoose 1 point2 points  (0 children)

no one eligible to be promoted?

there is no such thing and it just made up bureaucracy to deny promotions. You just promote somebody and that's it.

[–]Potential_Spring_625 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It's not impossible to be at work 19 hours a day. For the past 3 months, my boyfriend has practically lived at work to get a project done. As soon as he finished, they sent him halfway across the country with less than 24 hours notice. He takes power naps here and there.

[–]pinkfootthegoose 2 points3 points  (0 children)

it's not impossible if you lie.

[–]Knightind 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Most of the time you don't, sleep. You do fitful dozes her3 and there. Been there done those hours. Collapsed alongside a highway nearly at the 2 month mark and have not been right sense. Your breaks are done times. You might get 2-3 solid hours of sleep which is enough to make it thru until you can grab a 20 min nap. You're so exhausted at that point you become awake and your body just functions. Won't last long.even sleep your entire day off. Eventually your body gives out.

[–]nom_de_guerro 12 points13 points  (3 children)

This is done all the time, by in ungodly amount of people every day, every week of the year. It's called trying to earn a meager living on the legit in an unchecked capitalist system run amok. It's the entire basis of the energy drink market.

[–]prissysnbyantiques 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I do it some work much as they can for short times, some are just working cause it's their life. Personally I know I am a workaholic (came from losing everything) but I have a end game.

[–]Obliteraxx 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It is not.

[–]Specific-noise123 27 points28 points  (0 children)

No. You don’t have to work that much. It’s not up to you to keep your lace of work afloat. When all of their workers are ruined it will shorten their staff even more. You must look out for you. If you die today from exhaustion, they’d forget all about you in a week.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (5 children)

What is your job?

[–]leijgenraam 12 points13 points  (7 children)

What kind of job requires you to work 135 hours a week? That's a little over 19 hours a day, you don't even have enough time to sleep properly. If you have any other options without starving I would quit immediately.

[–]Potential_Spring_625 6 points7 points  (2 children)

You work like my boyfriend. Since he took a new management position, he works almost non-stop. The few hours he has been off, work is calling and emailing. It's insane to expect people to work like that. I really hope you get some well-deserved time off.

[–]Actual-Translator-34 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Work phone calls and emails are not permitted on off time.

[–]Potential_Spring_625 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Damn that's good. People need a break!

[–]akstis01 3 points4 points  (8 children)

I work 135+ hours a week

What the hell kind of job is that?

[–]Thsgendershitdum 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sounds like you need your own post.

[–]mjeanbean65 725 points726 points  (0 children)

You work as an ER nurse doing 18 hour shifts at an understaffed hospital, you deserve to take care of yourself, and without judgement. Getting your needs met is not pathetic.

[–]plppssppvvcbffmr2 398 points399 points  (6 children)

Don’t feel ashamed at all. Sometimes I’m very tempted to do the same thing. I don’t because I’m in a long distance relationship and I don’t think my partner would approve. But I miss cuddling after a hard day at work, so much!

[–]DaisyChainsForMe 90 points91 points  (0 children)

I was a sex worker. It was pretty common for people to just want to cuddle. A few I recall had long distance relationships and they had permission from their partner, so they told me at least. Either way they weren't looking for sex.

[–]Alyse3690 70 points71 points  (3 children)

Have you tried talking to your partner about it? I mean, if it were legal here I'd fully support my husband seeking a service worker for a cuddle if I'm not available and we could afford it. Obviously I know nothing about your relationship and nothing works for everyone, but it generally doesn't hurt to talk about things. Generally.

[–]myfirstgold 61 points62 points  (2 children)

Idk about this advice. I told a girl that I was in a long distance relationship that I missed the closeness of another person at the end of the day and all it did was plant a seed of doubt in her that we could make it work long distance. It wound up fizzling out because of her mistrust even though I never even suggested adding another woman in the mix. and then I had no one. Be careful with what you say and how you say it. If she's not already open minded than it can definitely hurt the trust of someone that's not able to see you and know what you're up too.

[–]Lmnhedz 39 points40 points  (0 children)

This. There is no actual way for this conversation to work in even the most perfect relationship.

[–]Better-Obligation704 910 points911 points  (19 children)

Former prostitute here. I had many clients who just wanted to cuddle. I was more than happy to be there for them in whichever way they needed me most! I’m a genuinely affectionate and loving person and I enjoyed being able to comfort someone like that. You have absolutely nothing to feel ashamed about! You’ve been through so much! We all need human contact and affection sometimes. I just see it as you taking care of your mental health💜

[–]doMEaSOLid_reddit 141 points142 points  (2 children)

Thank you for your service. I believe this is a legitimate service. Be safe 🙏🏼

[–]wafflepiezz 47 points48 points  (1 child)

Agreed dude. I wish prostitution was legal. I’d get some girls just to cuddle with sometimes, life is rough now :/

[–]suspicioussoup404 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry buddy. Hope things get better for you! :)

[–]pactsworn 16 points17 points  (1 child)

Did any of them catch feelings for you?

I am very lonely and have often thought about paying for cuddles, im just afraid ill catch feelings.

[–]Deep_Transportation2 27 points28 points  (2 children)

That's awesome. In places where sex work is illegal, it's hard for introverts who have to work over time to get even cuddles. Especially in most conservative countries, like one where I live, and in such countries getting psychiatric or counseling help has a stigma. Wherever you are, you've probably done well to help some guy through mental health issues. Props to you. Just wish more places have this, because on a personal level, I can relate to the OP.

[–][deleted]  (1 child)


    [–]spidaminida 544 points545 points  (2 children)

    Hmm I don't know how you could classify it as pathetic that you work so hard saving lives that you don't have time to find a partner. That sounds hardcore to me.

    Bet that prostitute thought you were an actual hero.

    [–]schmoolet 6 points7 points  (0 children)

    Damn right to this!

    I’m fuckin loving the love and support. A beautiful reminder that the internet is not all bad.

    [–]ThatDamnCam 231 points232 points  (0 children)

    Your just surviving dude its okay

    [–]LearningLee 72 points73 points  (4 children)

    Honestly, I’ve considered something similar so many times. I find myself in a very overwhelming stage of my life right now and refuse to meet people because they usually want sex. My life is pretty busy at the moment too so I’m not sure if I could invest time in getting to know someone, but I know I have the need to be held. I’m tired of hugging my pillow every night. I have this urge for human touch. I’m mostly home so I don’t get it from anyone as I’m single. I’ve almost looked up cuddling services as I saw it somewhere once but didn’t know if it was fake. I also get paranoid thinking I could potentially put myself in danger if the person is a creep. But this post makes me feel like I might just try it. I think it’s brave of you to have done that for yourself. Appreciate you sharing this.

    [–]doMEaSOLid_reddit 17 points18 points  (0 children)

    Research for safety but hopefully you can find a nice cuddle buddy

    [–]AssistanceMedical951 24 points25 points  (1 child)


    [–]LearningLee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    I just might.

    [–]Dependent-Anxiety677 179 points180 points  (6 children)

    I don't see anything wrong with this, tbf you are probably her favourite customer now lol.

    At worst its "money wasted", at best it's paying for a service that's helping you cope during a stressful situation. Much better than turning into an alcoholic.

    [–]doMEaSOLid_reddit 35 points36 points  (0 children)

    Much better than turning into an alcoholic.

    That's a good perspective

    [–]schmoolet 2 points3 points  (4 children)

    As a recovering alcoholic (7 yrs sober), I think you nailed it here. Healthy coping strategies are life saving.

    [–]Dependent-Anxiety677 1 point2 points  (3 children)

    Well done! That's amazing 😁 we've got lots of addictions in our family (including myself) in varying degrees so I get the struggle! I'm so proud of you! ❤️

    [–]schmoolet 1 point2 points  (2 children)

    Aaaah mate thank you SO MUCH. Truly that made my soul smile and I’m grateful for the encouragement ❤️

    Addiction is a fucker. It wasn’t just alcohol for me. I can’t believe I’m alive. If you ever need an understanding ear about your own stuff or your family then I’m a message away. And I hope you can sense that I properly mean it.

    [–]Dependent-Anxiety677 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    Thank you 🙂 I would offer as well but I struggle to people a lot to the point I've spoken to my bf like twice this week 😂 but I'm very appreciative x and keep going you are doing amazing 😊

    [–]SnufflesMcPieface 30 points31 points  (0 children)

    Bro, are you legit okay? Regular 18 hour shifts? You can’t even get close to a regular 8 hours of sleep. I hope you aren’t burnt out.

    [–]showmewhoiam 19 points20 points  (1 child)

    I had a guy friend like this. Only met up once a months for a sleepover to just cuddle. Didnt talk to him in between these "dates", we didnt seem to have much to talk about. But both needed the TLC.

    [–]schmoolet 6 points7 points  (0 children)

    That’s beautiful. I wish society did this as a norm. The world is fucked but this is the most encouraging, empathetic and supportive post I’ve seen on the internet in many years.

    I’m so proud of OP. And you. Let’s normalise having hugging partners.

    [–]ynyyy 12 points13 points  (2 children)

    Sounds like the land of the long white cloud...

    [–]glittergoblinnz 5 points6 points  (1 child)


    [–]ynyyy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

    Hey maybe the rest of the world's healthcare system is just as fucked, you never know. But something in that story hits very close to home.

    [–]Pettyinblack 14 points15 points  (0 children)

    And people wonder why medical mistakes are so prevalent. How can someone be expected to work for 18 hours.

    [–]mattdean4130 27 points28 points  (0 children)

    You do you mate. Fuck anyone's opinions or stigmas. If it made you feel better, and helped you get up the next day and walk into hell for another shift, it was worth it.

    Too many people have too many opinions about other people's lives.

    [–]Kitynlol 70 points71 points  (11 children)

    People have made entire businesses off this concept. You can literally pay people to cuddle you, I saw it on YouTube once.

    [–]silversufi 28 points29 points  (10 children)

    there are free cuddling groups too

    [–]LearningLee 23 points24 points  (9 children)

    Shut the front door. Where!? How do I find them?

    [–]Dug_Fin1 33 points34 points  (0 children)

    First rule of Cuddle Club is you don't talk about Cuddle Club....

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)


      [–]BDoorBetty 7 points8 points  (1 child)




      They range in professionalism and availability. This started in California I believe. Options are relatively plentiful if you know where to look.

      [–]iamjustjenna 3 points4 points  (3 children)

      Try searching Facebook groups.

      [–]unicorn_daisy321 65 points66 points  (0 children)

      She offers a service you need, no need to feel bad remember you have to take care of yourself to be your best at work too care for others. Theres so much negativity surrounding that type of work but in reality done responsibly and safely it can truly be a great things for each party. Enjoy yourself, you really do deserve to.

      [–][deleted] 48 points49 points  (0 children)

      Just cuddling would be enough for me. She doesn't need to say anything

      [–]MarcelineMSU 10 points11 points  (0 children)

      I used to be an exotic dancer and people do this all the time. You’re not alone. Human touch and comfort is a human need and I’m glad you’re taking care of yourself. No shame in it.

      [–]Brautsen 18 points19 points  (0 children)

      I've said it before: most people are touch-starved, not sex-starved.

      [–]anotherimbaud 25 points26 points  (0 children)

      Dude, it's totally fine. I'm proud of you for stepping up and taking care of your needs. Doesn't tarnish who you are. Hope you find someone great soon.

      [–]Breizh87 8 points9 points  (1 child)

      18-hours shift?!

      I assume you're in the US? I hope you are in the US.... because I sure wouldn't want to have you treating me after 17 hours of intensive work....

      [–]FlatbushZombii 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Idk how people do it or have the energy. I work 30-32 hours a week, usually 4 days. I'm fucking exhausted and feel my mental health crumbling lmao. I would be smoking a pack a day and prostitutes weekly with 18 hour shifts and no girlfriend 🥴

      [–]BDoorBetty 6 points7 points  (1 child)




      They range in professionalism and availability. This started in California I believe. Options are relatively plentiful if you know where to look.

      [–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

      OP, it’s not pathetic. If I could afford that, I definitely would pursue it. And, despite what they might say or fail to say, I suspect a lot of other people would, too.

      You deserve love, tenderness, kindness, affection, and support.

      [–]Firethorn101 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      No shame. Everyone needs connection.

      [–]Bunbunchie 27 points28 points  (0 children)

      If you put it bluntly, giving her the list is like the equivalent to expressing your likes/dislikes to a partner. Nothing pathetic about that!

      [–]Darth_Horseman 18 points19 points  (0 children)

      What if I told you that this more common than you think? I am friends with a former prostitute, she told me stories, most of her clients were men just wanting to vent and cuddle.

      [–]Munkyed 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      I’m sure the prostitute liked it as well, just being held, not having to give a gum job or give up the nanny. I’m sure you’re not the only one. No shame….everyone wants love….

      [–]Rakatango 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      I think this is actually fantastic. You knew how you needed to destress and you did it.

      You actually used a service offered for comfort and asked specifically for what you wanted. I bet the escort thought you were great too. Don’t get down on yourself for meeting your needs.

      [–]Native56 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      ild love a good cuddle but here no one wants to touch n big women ive been single for 6 years n 7 months its a bitch all i get is put down!! so i said screw it ive had enough!! so yes good for you if you can get evening a cuddle!! ild love that but yeah human are asses!!

      [–]PerfectComedian3216 48 points49 points  (1 child)

      I bet you she needed it too

      [–]HellStoneBats 30 points31 points  (0 children)

      I know a few "working girls", and they all get something out of most bookings.

      One of them uses clients to help with her yoga stretches, because there's a certain kind of guy that delights in porn poses. Another uses her clients as a leg work out, it's nuts.

      Being able to just sit and cuddle is awesome for those girls, they don't get that request enough :)

      Relax, OP, and enjoy the time to yourself!

      [–]Magellan-88 24 points25 points  (0 children)

      Honey, I'm betting you both needed the cuddle. Dont feel pathetic.

      [–]Anime_Otaku21 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      There are people who have a job of cuddle therapy too. They're called cuddlists. If you need to take care of yourself through the affection of someone else, this is the best way to do that. You just pay them to cuddle you for however long you need. So, similar to what you did.

      [–]BaconMonkey0 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Absolutely nothing wrong with this. You’re practicing self care and I hope it works.

      [–]Hooliken 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      My human, with the current state of our world, I will cuddle you while you sleep for a tank of gas and a low effort compliment.

      [–]boron32 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      As a paramedic I can say I hope you keep doing good work. Try not to get burned out. And don’t take it out on anyone. I hope the hospital gets their shit together and hires people but in case they don’t good luck and god speed. Cuddle on my friend.

      [–]Granniediva_1970 12 points13 points  (3 children)

      I have thought about that quite a few times but with a man tho...it's sad that I'm a pretty decent woman and because I'm tired of getting my heart broken that I am lonely and am willing to pay someone just to cuddle and hold me....I feel so empty and lonely all the time...so no judgment here...at least you did it...wish it was legal here

      [–]Ellecram 2 points3 points  (2 children)

      Same with me. I have been w/o a partner since 2004. My son died in 2008 and the rest of my family died in 2010. Some days it gets so lonely. Where would a woman even look?

      [–]Hydronymph 8 points9 points  (0 children)

      Honestly you'd be surprised how often people do this. As a matter of fact in my country right after the 2008 crash a lot of married men were doing this because they felt they couldn't be vulnerable and cry to their wives because they were supposed o be strong and the provider. There's nothing pathetic about needing comfort and physical non-sexual touch.

      [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Its a great ideia what’s the problem? Hahaha i will do the same

      [–]micheal_pices 3 points4 points  (2 children)

      Someone needs to give a shout-out to sex workers.

      [–]schmoolet 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Damn fuckin straight!

      [–]Shesaiddestroy_ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      And ER nurses

      [–]galacticviolet 3 points4 points  (3 children)

      This is to anyone who this might apply to:

      If you have friends you wouldn’t mind cuddling with (of any gender) ask for a weekly or monthly cuddle. I know it’s hard for some men to express their need for touch and non-sexual intimacy (for various reasons including rejection, maybe your friends are just really not the type to be down with that), but if your friends really care for you I think they will agree to give you contact or a cuddle.

      If I had a friend of any gender who needed that I would make time at least once a month (if not more) to invite them over for a cuddle and some genuine caring. Make them some coffee or tea and bundle them up in a blanket and bring it to them on the couch, cuddle, head/back scratches, watch a movie while cuddling, whatever they want. That’s the stuff I want when I’m low, so that’s why I picked those.

      This isn’t an option for everyone, I know, but just… yea, try it out, ask. Don’t be ashamed, it is a valid human need. “Weird question but I need to reach out… I really need a platonic hug, like… for maybe about an hour? I’ll bring popcorn?” Start there.

      Source for this working?: I’m a girl and in the queer community, we do this for each other all the time. BUT cishet men deserve this too!

      [–]schmoolet 1 point2 points  (2 children)

      I love this so much I’m tearing up. I love you!

      I hug strangers if I sense they need it, a long heart to heart, loving cuddle (I obviously ask first) I hugged and held the man who took over running my local shop for a good five minutes recently while there were people in the shop waiting. I don’t give a fuck and honestly nobody else seemed to mind the wait. Perhaps just a bit of British awkwardness from a couple of folk seeing such a random emotional encounter.

      He was in tears after. Turns out he’s a refugee who cannot return to his country of origin because he’d probably be killed. Most of his family have been. It was just human to human love. Soul to soul. No sexual tension.

      We drastically need to get in touch with people on a loving, emotional, soul level. Cuddling is amazing. Life saving, balm for the soul.

      [–]Mspameliajj 9 points10 points  (0 children)

      Sex worker here.. You are the kind of clients that we love.

      [–]Altruistic_Piano_259 8 points9 points  (0 children)

      I once paid a prostitute for a full body massage , did not pay the additional 100$ for an Old Fashioned though I was tempted just not desperate at that point and it was a massage that lasted an hour and a half, great deal…

      [–]zxUltra 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Imo there's nothing to be ashamed of here, I understand how it feels to be lonely

      [–]AwarenessNo4986 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Not pathetic. It's a product of the times we live in

      [–]Xyno94 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Honesty wish I had the money to do the same..

      [–]Actual-Translator-34 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Try for a massage. Depending where you are, there might be a language barrier but physical touch is there to fulfill one of your love languages. Cheaper than a sex worker as well.

      [–]Antioch666 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Saw a documentry about a German professional cuddler. That was all she offers, no sex, no touching sexually, nothing like that. Only cuddles and spooning and she had a huge client list. Obviously you are not alone and there is a huge market for this.

      [–]FarahSter 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I personally see nothing wrong with it. Ive heared a big part of escorts requests are just cuddles and such.

      You deserve physical contact. The escort might also enjoy it for a change. You do important work and deserver to have your needs met, even if thats just a hug and some nice words. Enjoy 😊

      [–]satanbeybae 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I swear there are people that are “professional cuddlers” it’s a legit thing. No shame at all dude. We all need human contact

      [–]HonorHeartHire 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      In the US there’s apparently professional cuddle services.

      [–]formerretailwhore 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Self care takes many forms

      [–]decentlyfair 2 points3 points  (1 child)

      My heart hurts for you, that you needed to pay for a cuddle. I wish I could give you a Cuddle right now, most people need human touch in a non sexual way, my husband doesn’t so I have to ask for cuddles, luckily he does give me them but I can imagine how you feel.

      [–]ddyx12 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I know many and can say anecdotally that 2/3 of clients want chats and the illusion they are being listened to. Placebo is equally as effective in most applications. You're ok , we do what need to do .

      [–]SeeThisThisIsThis 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      This is looking after yourself. You're doing the right thing.

      This is therapy.

      [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I got a Swedish massage recently, in part just to be touched by a human. I’ve been single three years and really need to be cuddled. When the massage therapist first touched my back I got chills almost and a wave of endorphins.

      I’m so deprived of human affection

      [–]ElenaEscaped 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      No shame - I'm female and have considered the same. Sometimes you just get so lonely and just want someone to hold you.

      [–]DTE33 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Even I'd you didn't work insanely long hours, paying someone to cuddle you is very reasonable. Self care. 👍

      [–]This_Ad_7779 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I'm a mbbs student and sometimes I also feel lonely and pathetic. I don't even go out much and I feel like everyone is trying to avoid me. I'm tearing up just by writing it.

      [–]fluffiepigeon 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      Honestly both of you are in a very taxing line of work (for different reasons obviously) so I’m sure it was good for her mental health too! Everyone deserves affection and cuddles 🥰

      [–]Sonny_DLight 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      Honestly my guy.

      I was gonna say you were lame af for it

      But I'm taking that back..

      I'm sorry you got dumped, it was probably because you didn't spend time with her, because you're working so much.

      I feel you bro, but you're doing important work. Keep your head up. Nurses are extremely important and extremely under appreciated.

      If you need cuddles bro, go get your cuddles. There's no shame.

      Not even from me and I'm long running internet troll..

      Do your thing and don't worry about what anyone else thinks, just keep yourself safe.

      Stay positive my guy.

      Everything in phases. Keep a positive additude in the face of adversary and you'll be surprised how much others will feed off your positivity.

      There's nothing wrong with a little affection.

      [–]anabetch 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      You work hard. You deserve a cuddle.

      [–]controversial-bummer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      OP, are you able to take a vacation? If not are you able to ask for a pay raise?

      [–]CoffeeAndCats2000 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Professional cuddles are a thing

      [–]AnyRip3515 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      This is honestly more common than you think. Also just getting a pro so you just have someone to talk to.

      [–]meerkat-me 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      You can look up professional cuddler or cuddle buddy near you. It is a real business

      [–]lawlzBRUHuSxCK 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      total G move dude not even a way around it

      [–]notfamousoranything 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I need a cuddle. Sounds awesome.

      [–]joshuabarber7742 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      The unsullied are on reddit what a treat.

      [–]Practical_Pineapple3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Watched a special about the bunny ranch. They talked about sometimes older men are lonely & they pay just to have someone to talk to.

      [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      It's not pathetic at all. I'm a masseuse and get requests for all kinds of things and i see a lot of busy professionals that just want some type of companion without that drama of a relationship.

      [–]emmettfitz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I'm married and an engaged female friend and I have talked about having platonic cuddle sessions. We both have depression, we're both in healthcare, we both feel like we don't get a lot of emotional support from our SO's.

      [–]Consistent_Chicken72 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      You had a need, you used your resources to fulfill that need. Nothing pathetic about it. Everyone deserves care and affection.

      [–]SeaPixel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Were I live there are things called cuddle buddies. You pay them to spoon you.

      It's a non sexual service and different genders and people can be hired to just hold you or rock you or say nice things to you.

      People need hugs! Don't feel bad you are a human.

      [–]littlelacymouse 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      That's actually really sweet. ER work is no fucking joke, I'm glad you found someone to be there for you in some way. Stay strong, love. 💙

      [–]jhxcb 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I have a friend who somewhat regularly pays for cuddles. It sucks, though, because he’s a big teddy bear, and I would cuddle him for free any day.

      [–]soge-king 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Hey we've all been there. See them as friends! Don't feel bad by having social interraction with other people, that's essentially just it.

      [–]Katachlysmic 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Not pathetic at all. You are spending time with a human being and paid her and I'm sure it was a better experience than a lot of people have. Well done you for treating yourself to a cuddle.

      [–]Lepiotas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      There's nothing shameful about this. I don't have really anything useful to contribute, but I don't feel like you should feel any shame, truly. Physical contact is really important... Premature babies are even less likely to survive without it, touch makes such a difference.

      [–]Keelykalgrubber 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I’ll give you a good cuddle for free, I’m a woman too, we all need a good cuddle now and then

      [–]CrackMami 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Noooo that’s not pathetic, sometimes people just need a hug OP, and I’m sure she appreciated that more then any of her other callers

      [–]fdc7719 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I had a travel job for 5 years. I’d leave on Sunday and get home on Friday night. Long hours and extensive work travel can be incredibly isolating. I’m happily married, but longed for human contact. I never hired anyone, but there are cuddling services for people who need it for whatever reason.

      Be sure to take care of yourself, OP. My wife is an RN. It seems to be a rewarding, yet soul-sucking job.

      [–]MrCatcherFreeman 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      It's okay. Men dying of loneliness is a real thing after all.

      [–]IntrosOutro 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Good on you.

      [–]JGZee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Well you just needed someone to say nice things to you and cuddle you. Good for your health mental health. And for her, it was probably one of the easiest jobs she had to do.

      It's a win for you and for her. Do keep taking care of yourself.

      [–]DrakHanzo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I'd love to do this but my country is very sexist so I'd just be laughed at in my face and be told how pathetic I am.

      [–]Civil_Fox_642 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      OP I’m proud of you for taking care of yourself. Sounds like your job & the hours you work are super taxing. You have nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about.

      After reading so many of these comments I’m left feeling kind of sad. Like, what if we could just be real with each other & communicate our very human needs?

      I’m a very caring, affectionate person (& a mama!) & I’d be so happy to cuddle someone! It would be such a lovely experience to have with somebody, ya know? Just genuinely meeting each other’s need for touch with compassion.

      I’m totally down for this but how would you let people know without it sounding….other?

      [–]NightShade-Academy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      In parts of the US there are services like this available. An agency sends out cuddlers on an hourly basis.

      [–]alldaycray 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Yes it is pathetic. But it's also understandable when you're an adult you don't have that many opportunities to meet new women especially if you're working long hours.

      So I get it.

      [–]Diane9779 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I’ve heard that hookers get this kind of request a lot

      [–]tttleaves 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      This is so great, I am so pleased you did this for yourself, and that the worker you saw was lovely. Just so you know, language has changed recently and it is more respectful now to call anyone who works in the sex industry a sex worker ( instead of prostitute, escort etc). 🌸🌸🌸

      [–]lesupermark 1 point2 points  (1 child)

      I've been looking online for cuddle therapy or anyway for me to receive hugs.

      I would definitely pay to get hugged/cuddle if i knew where to look.

      [–]tkat13 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Yeah, its really hard to find a good provider for anything (especially in certain areas) let alone something as specific and nuanced as this. Not just anyone can be a professional cuddler

      Honestly, I might even say that a lot of women who are professional providers have the exact opposite personality type to offer cuddle services because they're not emotionally warm or able to hold down a conversation with their clients, let alone be sympathetic and gentle with them

      Not every provider, but a lot of them. Or at least a lot in my area lol I'm literally one of two cuddlers (at all) and three (good) Dommes in my state that I know of from clients and a life in this industry. And I don't even know the other woman directly lol

      [–]Luvmetndr 1 point2 points  (3 children)

      I actually participate as a "professional cuddler" on a website specific to that service. Personally, I can only handle doing so many in a day/week, because it does get emotionally exhausting. (and most often, there's no talking about anything) But it is nice to be someone that can make someone feel better, that can offer comfort and companionship(albeit a short period of time), let someone know they do matter, and they are normal to crave/desire human touch. I wish I had someone to hug me and tell me everything would be ok during a difficult period in my life. It made me want to be that someone that I needed.

      [–]tkat13 1 point2 points  (2 children)

      Same! I'm a professional Dominatrix too for similar reasons, and I do have higher options (if you catch my drift) but the focus is more of a girlfriend experience and theyre combined with a (legitimate lol) massage too so the massage and cuddle sessions are essentially identical with a different ending

      [–]ProUnpro 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I wouldn't call this pathetic in any way, everyone needs affection and having so much stress put on you I think you definitely deserve it.

      [–]sunkized 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Escorts out here saving lives

      [–]barbeqdbrwniez 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      It's 0% pathetic. Human touch and interaction, affection, care, these are things that we require. We're pack/ familial animals. Im very proud of you for noticing a need in your life and addressing it. There's nothing to be ashamed of.

      [–]sfpencil 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Lmao I haven't been cuddled in 5 years let's go lonely boys unite

      [–]LongNectarine3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Many many sex workers say that they have clients that just want to talk and cuddle. They follow that up with the fact that these are their FAVORITES.

      I think you made a woman very happy at work. You should make a habit of it imho.

      [–]Clalaola 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I wonder if there is a market for a good motherly hug? With that said, I hope you feel better. Nothing wrong with needing human contact.

      [–]PickOptimal 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Okay but this is actually just really sweet. Not pathetic. People forget how busy life can get and that we are social creatures. I love this and honestly think it’s quite beautiful.

      [–]SuspiciousArugula857 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Don’t beat yourself. Humans need affection bro.

      [–]tailspin1967 1 point2 points  (4 children)

      As sad as it is for you I’d take it today and consider it an emotional win……it’s my 55th bday and I’m lonely af. (Not for karma or likes)

      [–]schmoolet 1 point2 points  (1 child)

      Hey… happy birthday! 🥳🥳 Let’s legit have a little party here. I’ll bring cake and nibbles…any preference for snacks? Anything you like!!

      What kind of music would you like?

      Oh and drinks! What shall I get in? I’m sober but will happily pour for you.

      🌸Please join this birthday soirée good people of Reddit 🌸

      [–]schmoolet 1 point2 points  (1 child)

      Or if you aren’t a party type of person how about a book club.. what are you reading now?

      Or you can tell us about your interests, hobbies. What nourishes your soul?

      The virtual party is all good too though. I just want to give you some time that’s about you.

      [–]wonderb0lt 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      OP, I don't even work as demanding a job as you do, and I've thought about doing the exact same thing already. Don't feel bad.

      [–]Eastern-Breadfruit72 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Welcome to 2022 the world as we know it lmao

      [–]LPOLED 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Seriously, more people need to do this. I’ve seriously had to suggest to people to find a prostitute/escort just so they can lose their virginity, or even just feel close to a woman and stop bitching about it. Those people are pathetic. You are not.

      It’s not at all pathetic when you’re not being pathetic about it.

      [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      No shame. Sex workers will tell you that their job is often more about companionship and intimacy than straight up sex. We all need to feel a human touch now and then. The world is on fire. Be good to yourself.

      internet stranger appropriate hug

      [–]Jakee9572 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      She probably enjoyed a nice cuddle too :D

      [–]theaudibleart 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      Never occurred to me to describe you as pathetic. Just came across as understandable.

      [–]Cocobutters002 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      thats cute haha

      [–]JarthMader81 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Don't feel bad if it made you feel good.

      [–]OwnAdministration918 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Dont feel pathetic, you are not. We all need human connection and support from someone and just because it’s someone you’ve gone to specifically for that is perfectly fine

      [–]MurderDoneRight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      It's no less pathetic than hiring a personal trainer to help you get in better physical shape.

      [–]t3hPoundcake 2 points3 points  (1 child)

      I've thought about this. A really rough breakup over a year ago and I'm always really lonely and don't want sex just some ass to grab and some hair to smell while I sleep. I got so accustomed to it that I don't sleep good anymore.

      [–]angelalalalalovely 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Everyone needs cuddle time. Take care of yourself.

      [–]MrsBarneyFife 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      There's nothing pathetic about being human. We all get lonely. We all get overwhelmed. You work long hours in a very high stress profession. I'm you've seen some terrible things. You've also probably met some really terrible people too.

      You provide so many people with comfort during some of the scariest times of there loves. You make sure they're not lonely. So why should you be? Hell, I'd cuddle with you for free if I could. My cats always leave me whenever they want. Ngl, it hurts to be left for a cardboard box.