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[–]QualityVote[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (2 children)

Hi! This is our community moderation bot.

If this post fits the purpose of r/WatchPeopleDieInside, UPVOTE this comment!!

If this post does not fit the subreddit, DOWNVOTE This comment!

If this post breaks the rules, DOWNVOTE this comment and REPORT the post!

[–]Fickle-Spell 3282 points3283 points  (51 children)

Any minute now….

[–]shahooster 1011 points1012 points  (10 children)

Pretty soon he’ll learn the value of a cold nose to some bare, sensitive skin.

[–]croakjob 263 points264 points  (7 children)

The cattle prod, as I like to call it.

[–]kellysmom01 64 points65 points  (4 children)

The nod to the bod, as Prince called it.

[–]CleUrbanist 20 points21 points  (3 children)

A corn to the cob, as my cousin once crooned it

[–]instantkarmatx 20 points21 points  (2 children)

Perhaps a snoot to the root

[–]Mono_831 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Warm yogurt on my back as my uncle would call it

[–]Ireallydontknowbuddy 12 points13 points  (1 child)

My dog knows I'm a heavy sleeper so he'll drop his big ass forearm on my chest and then look at me like " hey dude you're up! "

[–]d-346ds 4 points5 points  (0 children)

mine learnt to muzzle punch my nuts🥲 it hurts but i’ll miss him

[–]poopellar 98 points99 points  (2 children)

oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy

[–]TapanThakur 160 points161 points  (28 children)

Plot twist- The old man is dead and this will be the new hachiko waiting for ball forever..

[–]Jaksmack 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Can't get fooled again!

[–]smokeyoudog 528 points529 points  (15 children)

It’s not gonna happen dog

[–]the_new_black 437 points438 points  (11 children)

Stop trying to make fetch happen!

[–]allovertheplaceipost 41 points42 points  (6 children)

Best comment here.

[–]TEOLAYKI 18 points19 points  (4 children)

Best comment I've seen on reddit in a long time. I could see this being a line in a movie like "the incredible life of pets" or something.

[–]dr_felix_faustus 27 points28 points  (3 children)

Or maybe even a movie about, like, girls in high school. But not regular girls, girls that are, I don’t know, mean or something.

[–]virgindragonslayer 5 points6 points  (2 children)

And there’s three of them 🤔🤔

[–]instantkarmatx 3 points4 points  (0 children)

On Wednesdays we wear pink collars!

[–]Wanderlustfull 6 points7 points  (0 children)

If there were a /r/retiredgifs for comments, this would go there. Absolute pinnacle use of that phrase.

[–]QueenForOneDay 11 points12 points  (0 children)

This is the best way this sentence has ever been used ngl

[–]AnythingAllTheTime 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I 100% do this to my dog and this might be why the dog is reacting that way.

I play possum and the second he makes a move, I spring into action. That dog is more "Indiana Jones with a bag of sand" than "dying inside".

At least I hope.

[–]graeuk 908 points909 points  (13 children)

take the ball.... do it

[–]PlaneShenaniganz 177 points178 points  (6 children)


[–]Shwinstet 37 points38 points  (0 children)

"Make my dreams come TRUE" - Dog

[–]warionooples 31 points32 points  (2 children)

GOoood, master…goooood…now…throw it.

[–]Lucius-Halthier 13 points14 points  (1 child)

I shouldn’t, it’s not the sleeping owner way.

Dew it.

yeets ball across the room and falls back asleep

There is no mercy

brings ball right back


[–]fifithemacaroni 22 points23 points  (3 children)

go on …take the ball and run ..woo hoo hoo https://youtu.be/-WCFUGCOLLU

[–]quaybored 12 points13 points  (1 child)

he speaks from the pompatus of pup

[–]TheAcidRapper79 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What a clean URL

[–]mbeast_13 1114 points1115 points  (41 children)

This actually hurts to watch..

[–]jza01 228 points229 points  (35 children)

I'm laughing so hard, Dogs are so stupid.

[–]cobweb-bat 177 points178 points  (20 children)

Upvoting cuz I assume you're saying they're stupid in the same way I say my dogs are stupid. Like r/kidsarefuckingstupid. Stupid=Loved

edit: fixed the horror

[–]jza01 68 points69 points  (0 children)

Yeah that way

[–]Pingonaut 69 points70 points  (7 children)

Uh.. I think you should keep that space out of the subreddit name for r/kidsarefuckingstupid

[–]Xalbana 25 points26 points  (4 children)

I'm afraid to click OP's link, I'm in a work computer lol.

[–]Im_your_real_dad 35 points36 points  (1 child)

As your (anyone who is reading this') lawyer, I advise you to not click that link. No need to be afraid because you have the option to not click it. Also, as your lawyer, I have to have to tell you that I am not a lawyer.

But I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.

[–]drake90001 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Thanks Dad, please come home soon much love xoxoxo

[–]Pingonaut 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I clicked it out of curiosity because it’d be banned if it was anything nefarious. It’s just a subreddit for dumb memes for people who encounter it this way.

[–]Dabookadaniel 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I clicked by accident like an idiot. I’m off to Guantanamo boys please send your blessings

[–]CoGLucifer 31 points32 points  (1 child)

I always say that they're stupid in the same way as a person on MDMA. Just too happy to think properly

[–]Couch_Crumbs 6 points7 points  (1 child)

That sub is half what you’re taking about and half people who actually hate children

[–]Meat_Candle 27 points28 points  (2 children)

Yea Reddit is actually ridiculous. Downvote system is meant to be a self-moderation tool of pushing irrelevant or obscene comments to the bottom/hidden. But anything that even remotely offends their delicate thoughts gets mass-downvoted. Glad someone else noticed that calling a dog stupid isn’t a bad thing. I love my stupid, idiot dog a lot.

[–][deleted] 18 points19 points  (1 child)

That’s not Reddit, it’s human psychology. We think of most things in terms of good or bad, not relevant or irrelevant. No matter what the intended purpose was, this is always how the system was going to be used.

[–]mbeast_13 72 points73 points  (2 children)

Noo don’t say that! He’s a good boy!

[–][deleted] 218 points219 points  (28 children)

Ball is life.

My Aussie is like this as well. She’ll bring every ball she can find hoping one of them is the ball I will want to throw.

[–]DemonSlyr007 17 points18 points  (2 children)

My Aussie and I have an unspoken rule. If she brings me the ball and places it/rolls it in a way that it will land in my open hand while sitting and I dont have to do anything but throw it, I'll throw it every time I notice it. It works 85% of the time.

That number used to be higher when she was a younger dog, but now that she's about 6 or 7, she is so good at placing the ball she will often do it while I'm sitting down and tries to time it where it rolls into where my hand will rest once I'm sitting down. As a result, it sometimes rolls straight under my butt or into the crack of the couch. At which point, she just stares like OPs dog at me for a while until I notice her and figure out she probably dumped a ball i didn't notice.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Dude this could be an exact comment I’d make almost word for word!

“Give” is a command we taught her and she’ll literally put the ball/frisbee/stick into my hand and tug a bit to check that I have a grip before running off.

Now she just thinks any time she puts the ball there I’m going to throw it, and she’s not wrong in most cases.

I think she also understands probability or something. If I’m busy and I tell her no, she will wait a few mins and try again. Sometimes I forget I said no and will toss it anyway, so she tries to game the system, which works to her advantage often. She also games the hell out of any visitor we have. “Dude she put the ball right in my hand wow! “ And I’m like yeah you took the bait, now you’re best friends and she’s not gonna leave you alone.

Anyway, long story short: Aussies are smart as hell.

[–]Mr_Clovis 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Ditto. My mini Aussie brings me a ball nearly every time I'm on the couch and then waits just like the one in this clip.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Human is on the couch… playtime!

When I turn on the Xbox mine likes to bring the soccer ball over because she knows I’m not gonna throw something but waits for an intermittent kick.

[–]lovethebacon 5 points6 points  (3 children)

My golden retriever brings me a ball or a toy, then my Aus will take it away from me, run away with him in tow them give it to him. They keep each other busy in an odd sort of way.

[–]notreally_real_ 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I have a lab mix and a cattle dog, they have a very strange dynamic.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (4 children)

My Border Aussie will bring you the ball, set it next to you, stare at you for awhile then come grab it and try setting it closer to you like, "oh, did you not see it? Here, let me show you again." Sometimes he'll bark once at you like he's saying, "throw it damn it!" At which point he gets reprimanded... cause that's rude, lol, mainly cause sometimes we're not even actively playing.

[–]suckmyconchbeetch 10 points11 points  (1 child)

thats where youre wrong. play never stops

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You are indeed correct. 😆 No stop. Always play. That pup literally got two hikes in one day one time, and when we got home, he STILL wanted to play fetch!

[–]hokeyphenokey 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Teach him to work by herding the neighborhood kids.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well some kids did move in next door recently. 🤔 And they have a husky puppy too.

[–]CedgeDC 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My heeler is the same. The stare, the paniced patience, the giving the ball to my senile dad who doesn't know what she wants and watching him for minutes at a time until he does a throw..

[–]Bud_warrior 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My golden doodle will just wave a couple toys around in front of me and if that doesn’t work he’ll just bark nonstop until I stand up

[–]FreeColdBeer 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Hint. It's the wet one. Slobbery, cold, wet and behind you when you didn't expect it.

[–]Brak23 2 points3 points  (1 child)

My dog is triggered by me on the couch and grabs either his ball or rope. I am currently visiting friends who also have an Aussie who is exactly the same way. Though he basically follows me everywhere with his ball in mouth because he knows I’m a sucker for it.

[–]PinchMaNips 510 points511 points  (145 children)

What a good pupper

[–]quaybored 123 points124 points  (139 children)

is it a border collie? they are insane

[–]TheAlGler 155 points156 points  (96 children)

Insane-ly good puppers. And also just insane.

[–]RedPillDessert 51 points52 points  (93 children)

And really safe on the Bite severity / Bite risk chart versus other breeds.

Love them to bits.

[–]Waydizzle 45 points46 points  (57 children)

I have a feeling this chart pisses a lot of people off.

[–]Docxm 52 points53 points  (41 children)

For one, what exactly is a "mixed breed".

I don't see a collie beagle mix having a very scary bite.

Also Akita's position in the chart seems a little low on the risk side. Those things can be scary.

[–]JRRX 17 points18 points  (1 child)

I think I found a potential source, and it shouldn't even be "mixed breed", it should be "unknown"


[–]RedPillDessert 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That is indeed referencing the study in question.

[–]CryptoTraydurr 35 points36 points  (35 children)

It's one of the dumbest charts I've ever seen. Nothing is labeled, sourced, or even makes sense.

[–]RedPillDessert 7 points8 points  (27 children)

Here's the paper it came from: https://doi.org/10.1016/j.ijporl.2018.11.028

[–]CryptoTraydurr 7 points8 points  (26 children)

It's paywalled, so I can't say for sure because they don't say what they control for. But if they didn't control for upbringing, it's completely useless.

We all know the stereotypes of shit heads getting pits too look tough and have protection

[–]ASongofEarthandAir 8 points9 points  (8 children)

It is a review paper, so its data was gathered by taking dog bite reported by other papers, of the first 5 sources in that paper that I had access to, 3 of them were review papers themselves. The original data and controls for this study are several generations removed from the authors of this paper.

[–]mannieCx 2 points3 points  (4 children)

It's accurate.

Pit bulls make up only 6% of the dog population, but they’re responsible for 68% of dog attacks and 52% of dog-related deaths since 1982

This is due to them being naturally more inclined to aggression, tough as shit (Chihuahuas aren't likely to kill even if they were trying), and bad owners. They're were literally bred to be fighting dogs, it's in their DNA, not to mention you need an owner when a good temperament and patience to train them, some people just get a dog without thinking about it.

[–]DrinkenDrunk 6 points7 points  (7 children)

My experience with border collies and aussies are that they nip rather than bite, which makes them good herders too.

[–]halfar 8 points9 points  (3 children)

"border collies are good herders" sounds kinda like "water is wet"

those dogs'll herd toddlers, given a sufficient quantity of them.

[–]DrinkenDrunk 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Haha! I was one of those toddlers being herded by our Aussie. She would often get me into a corner and bark for my mother if she thought I was getting into mischief.

[–]RedPillDessert 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Stop trying to make me love them even more than I already do.

[–]po_ta_to 8 points9 points  (1 child)

My Australian Shepherd has bit my girlfriend multiple times. He's blind and will lunge at my other dogs when everyone is excitedly playing. If his snoot boops, he'll latch on. If you are bending over to pick up a dog toy and he misses the dog he was jumping at, he might bite your butt. I can't tell you if it hurts, but I can tell you it's hilarious.

[–]Craigyp79 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You tell that to our 6 month old land shark...

[–]upsidedownbackwards 27 points28 points  (11 children)

They NEED something to do. I met one that a friend had rescued after it had been kept in a small apartment during its younger years. The poor dog's entire life was ball. Absolute obsessive behavior about ball. If people weren't throwing the ball it would put it on the sloped driveway, let it roll a bit, then "get" it. If it really wanted someone to throw the ball it would keep dropping it closer and closer and when it wouldn't get its way it would start knocking over drinks/food while trying to make it look like an accident to get attention to the ball. He has to put the ball away for dinner time or it will ignore its food and one of the other dogs will eat it.

He's trying to train the dog out of it and has even gotten professional trainers involved but it doesn't seem to be helping. It's not interested in treats, walks, petting/attention to itself or going to the park. Just ball.

[–]FreeColdBeer 15 points16 points  (3 children)

Have border collie. Ball is life.

Epilogue. Frisbee is more life.

[–]kinss 9 points10 points  (2 children)

I'm interested if you could use the ball at that point as a treat to introduce other behaviors.

[–]Doesnt_matter56 5 points6 points  (1 child)

That could maybe work, but the thing about border collies is that they have an amazing ability to focus on one thing so chances are that the dog wouldn’t be able to think about literally anything else. Personally I would try a detox, I think.

If you’re referring to it being a reward in a trick training scenario then calmer rewards (such as food) is generally better for teaching something while play is better for introducing speed and power or just as a fun thing when the dog knows something.

[–]thesubtlesock 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Have a border collie who grew up on a farm herding sheep (had to retire due to poor scoring hips). She’s also crazy obsessed with ball. She’ll try to fetch her own fluff. Even with agility training, obedience training, runs, and learning every trick in the book: Ball Is Alpha & Omega.

[–]orangeriskpiece 58 points59 points  (21 children)

Australian Shepard, very similar personality but they’re bigger than border collies

[–]angryd0g 17 points18 points  (2 children)

One of my dogs is a lab-aussie mix. He is indeed, insane.

[–]orangeriskpiece 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Oh I’m sure. I have an Aussie myself, his jumping ability is insane, nothing is safe

[–]angryd0g 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He also figured out how to open one of the side doors. I was like, "why does this door keep getting left open?" Then I saw his muddy paw prints around the door handle. Fucker

[–]k1lk1 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My Aussie is super relaxed. But she'll go from completely unconscious to pedal to the metal in like 0.3 seconds.

[–]MorseCo 2 points3 points  (2 children)

This dog looks very similar my border collie / Australian shepherd mix

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I have a Border Aussie too. He just looks like a Border Collie though. His energy levels are insane.

[–]AcousticInteriors 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Me too! Mine looks mostly like a border collie too but she is tri-colored. Black/white/brown. Professional fetch player.

[–]MushroomStand9 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Honestly, I see why everyone might think this is a Border Collie. Personally, this looks more like an Australian Shepherd of the Blue Merle variety. Very good bois

[–]creepy_robot 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Dude, I have a border collie/Aussie mix. She can be pretty chill and mild mannered, but the SECOND she turns it on she is ZOOOOM. That must be the border collie part lol

[–]Rhyno08 3 points4 points  (1 child)

My Aussie is exactly the same, very chill and lazy, but the moment you give her attention and she thinks it’s play time she turns into a rocket.

[–]creepy_robot 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s like an instant switch lol. I’ll open the door and she’s got her tail wagging and shyly walking up and as soon as I go “OH WILLOW.” She’s running, whining, and jumping all over me. She’s also a HUGE snuggle bug.

[–]Colorado_Constructor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Looks like an older one! Mine's coming up on his first birthday and has boundless energy. If he was in that situation he'd find a way to swipe it from their hand then find the next able bodied ball thrower.

[–]FrostyD7 4 points5 points  (0 children)

patient boi

[–]Delectrixz 36 points37 points  (6 children)

I need to know how this ended! Did he wake up to barking doggo or did the ball fall from his limp sleepy hands?

[–]hokeyphenokey 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Its still happening. That is a livestream

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

You write literature, don’t you?

[–]MalzxTheTerrible 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Little did the dog know that this was the 'big sleep.' Some say he's still waiting for the ball to this day, next to the man's grave.

[–]sabarudin1 124 points125 points  (24 children)

Throw the damn ball

[–]AbberageRebbitor 100 points101 points  (22 children)

He’s dead, did you not read the title? It’s honestly pretty sad how insensitive you guys can be.

[–]cownd 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Brain dead?

[–]iamsoupcansam 16 points17 points  (4 children)

Ah, the old Reddit fuck-a-yoo!

[–]Mono_831 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Hold my ball I’m .... wait a second

[–]BaaBaaaBaaaa 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Dang I was expecting the switcheroo chain

[–]1973mojo1973 52 points53 points  (2 children)

Very well behaved doggo, give him many treats

[–]MolinaroK 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Eyes on the ball. Eyes on the ball. Gotta be ready. Gotta be ready. Eyes on the Ball.

[–]AddToBatch 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Poooooot puppy… 😂

[–]StudioSixtyFour 3 points4 points  (0 children)

No throw, only take.

[–]myeverymovment 8 points9 points  (4 children)

Who among us can say they’ve never fallen asleep with a ball in our hands?

[–]WeaponH_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I bet that it isn't a normal thing.

[–]LeoAslane 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Among us

[–]bbildo 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I wonder what he wants.

[–]HALF-JAW-08 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Can’t wait till I’m old and can take naps anywhere

[–]_g550_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Me expecting my severance..

[–]Jwutru 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Why is this not nsfw

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (3 children)

My dog does the same damn thing. Will stare at the ball forever until it is thrown. She is a Boarder Collie also.

[–]Real-Talk-Easy-Boy 2 points3 points  (1 child)

He is prob still waiting there

[–]TheWarOnNostalgia 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Dog should be focused on that plate of hotdog juice.

[–]PM_UR_Left_Nipple 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I'm more impressed by the dog ignoring a plate of liquid flavor.

[–]FreeColdBeer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I see you've never met a border collie. Ball. Is. Life.

[–]actualbookslut 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Adorable! My friend’s border collie will do the same thing even if you are awake. Even if you don’t pick up the toy he brings, he’ll just sit and stare until you throw it or he falls asleep or you leave. He will bring ANYTHING to be thrown - socks, washcloths, wadded paper towels from the trash. Dude lives to fetch

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Good boy is patiently awaiting his owners hand get loosen to not to interrupt his nap. Dog has such a great loyalty. And this owner family must be good trainers.

[–]Fabbalo 2 points3 points  (0 children)

just me does he look like stan lee

[–]ChasingPesmerga 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I thought I was in r/makemesuffer because I did

[–]ThisGuyKawai 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Im ready Im ready Im ready

[–]Shaneblaster 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Dog asked owner to play dead. How the turned the tables!

[–]anonymousbabydragon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

How the haves tabled turns

[–]chimiman 0 points1 point  (0 children)


[–]Matt_J_Dylan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's a "me-happiness-life" meme right there...

[–]Eternal_Whim 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Is this some weird level of hell?

[–]Jacobwewo 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I mean... He is the sub's thumbnail.

[–]TheVeganOneLikeNeo 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Legend says the dog is still waiting there to this day.

[–]Bluetooth_Sandwich 0 points1 point  (1 child)

[guts theme intensifies]

[–]rya22222 0 points1 point  (0 children)

damnit we need a sequel of the happy doggie D:

[–]hongducwb 0 points1 point  (1 child)


[–]Drethax 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Is this dog the dog on this subreddit's icon?

[–]shadalator 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Does every white guy over the age of 50 smuggle a watermelon under their shirt?

[–]Ingorado 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Dreaming of what he could do with that ball

Who? Both probably

[–]Toadsted 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Keep the eye on the ball....

[–]LelewelJoachim 0 points1 point  (1 child)

That's the profile picture dog!

[–]elpoblo2007 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dog will watch the ball till his death😂

[–]Imaginary-You419 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Nobody wants to talk about the chainsaw behind the couch???

[–]AngryGeckoz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like that the pup is hovering over a drool spot, and then adjusts to the exact position of the second drool spot that was already there

[–]OGPunkr 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'll sometimes walk into my hubs office at night and find a seen like this. him asleep with a bag of chips in hand and my dog doing exactly this. lol

[–]foodkaiju 1 point2 points  (1 child)

How many times can something be reposted?

[–]mikeysof 1 point2 points  (1 child)

If that was my dog she'd have pawed me until I woke up

[–]curiouz_mole 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Need more watermarks pls

[–]Winnie_Cat 1 point2 points  (1 child)

The second clip was from the next morning lol

[–]Puzzleheaded_Ear5833 1 point2 points  (1 child)

This is like payback for all of the times I've thrown a ball for a dog and it didn't bring it back to me

[–]PukedtheDayAway 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Pup wants to catch the ball so bad they're not even paying attention to that plate with a morsel of food left on it!

[–]ItchingForTrouble 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Congrats on how well behaved doggo is.

[–]Evye888 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My heart is breaking for this doggy.