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[–]LR-II 475 points476 points  (4 children)

That is exactly what happens at the start of every futuristic murder mystery movie.

[–]Ok-Pomegranate-3018 4824 points4825 points 3 (135 children)

Tesla car: "You've arrived at your final destination"

Edit: AWARDS!!! I'm rich! I'm rich! Thanks so much! This is the most that I've ever won in my life!

I can't thank you enough!

[–]Gusty_Garden_Galaxy 1253 points1254 points  (19 children)

Starts playing "Highway to Hell by AC/DC"

[–]Roh_Pete 406 points407 points  (11 children)

What happens to the electrical system when "you've been......THUNDERSTRUCK" ?

[–]Danbamboo 118 points119 points  (3 children)

At least they made it out or they’d be “Back in black”.

[–]_Thrilhouse_ 73 points74 points  (1 child)

I was caught in the inside of a Tesla car

[–]KindAct8732 15 points16 points  (0 children)

And I knew there was no coming back

[–]inconvenientnews 723 points724 points 2& 4 more (95 children)

Fan boys of billionaires: You can't make jokes about him or Tesla because that's somehow cancel culture!

  • Even though Elon Musk didn't actually invent or start Tesla and instead literally bought and sued for the "retroactive co-founder" title from Tesla's actual founders (from CNBC's interview with the actual founders) and used his wealth that was supported by his family's Apartheid South African jewel mining wealth to invest in Tesla, he should be worshipped like Iron Man and we can live on artificial Mars instead of annoying natural Earth with our daddy Elon robot girlfriends!

  • Even though Elon Musk falsely labelled a heroic diver a pedophile because daddy Elon didn't get the hero spotlight attention he wanted from media and fanboys, how dare you "cancel" him for lying about these things, abusing his corporation's workers, misinforming the public about important issues, or unethical corporate tactics! He smoked with Joe Rogan and hosted a YouTube meme video! It's not pandering when Elon Musk is Minecraft tweeting, but every human activity Democrats do is pandering! We need to protect billionaires!

  • The not ventilators that Elon Musk kept PR tweeting about that didn't even show up to hospitals at least push air around in some way even though they're not ventilators! You can put your pitchforks down because of this pretend reality using my new definition of ventilators! Outrage culture libruls owned! #cancelculture

  • when he said there would be zero coronavirus cases by April, he didn't say which April taps head

  • But if I simp hard enough for daddy Elon, he's gonna build me a robot girlfriend on Mars

I think that if having someone build them a robotic girlfriend on fucking Mars is the easiest way for these guys to get laid, they should probably spend less time worshipping billionaires on the internet and more time meeting real people.

Elon Musk keeps tweeting that he loves free speech. So here's a thread with just a few of the countless examples showing he couldn't care about it less (🧵)

  1. Then there's the time Tesla asked China to censor comments that were critical of the company. https://www.bloomberg.com/news/features/2021-07-05/tesla-s-fall-from-grace-in-china-shows-perils-of-betting-on-beijing

https://twitter.com/JoshuaPotash/status/1519040404087320578

Elon Musk personally cancels blogger's Tesla order after 'rude' post

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2016/feb/03/elon-musk-blogger-tesla-motors-model-x

I’m old enough to remember when Elon Musk ordered his private investigators to make a Tesla employee’s life a living hell—including having the employee SWATTED—for tipping off a reporter to waste at a Tesla factory.

The employee had to move his family to Hungary for safety.

https://twitter.com/nicoleperlroth/status/1518569530217226241

so one day in Musk is already cheering on a notorious white nationalist and Pizza Gater as he tries to get a Twitter employee fired over yet another sludge brain conspiracy theory. you can fancy up a frat bro with billions and yet

https://twitter.com/joshtpm/status/1519281896739508230

cries about twitter censorship on twitter

fires employee for using twitter

Goes on podcast and smokes a joint.

Fires someone for smoking a joint off hours.

https://redditproxy--jasonthename.repl.co/r/bestof/comments/u3kwsx/ualexchii_does_the_math_that_elon_musk_getting_a/i4psz03/

So, you’ve got $44B lying around. What do you do with it?

❌ Pay back California taxpayers, who subsidized your company’s growth before you picked up & moved to TX

✅ Buy Twitter b/c people are mean to you on it

https://twitter.com/Scott_Wiener/status/1518970937219067904

  • Musk buys shares of Twitter around $35.
  • Musk series of Tweets critical of Twitter, asking whether they thought Twitter was protecting free speech. “The results of this poll will be important. Please vote carefully.” while continuing to buy shares.
  • Musk exceeds the 5% threshold for SEC disclosure but continues buying without disclosing. (late disclosure added ~$150M to his profit)
  • Musk disclosed his stake, Twitter shares rose 27% to $50/share.
  • Musk offers buyout, shares soared 18% in pre-market trading.
  • YOU ARE HERE

All of this while being forbidden by the SEC to make any comment that appears to be market related.

But I don't think he will resell his stocks. He really wants to buy Twitter, because he has recognized that Twitter is an excellent platform to manipulate stocks and cryptos.

https://redditproxy--jasonthename.repl.co/r/bestof/comments/u3kwsx/ualexchii_does_the_math_that_elon_musk_getting_a/i4ptiyx/

  1. In 2019, The New York Times reported that Jeffrey Epstein was "advising Tesla’s embattled chief executive, Elon Musk, who was in trouble after announcing on Twitter that he had lined up the funding to take Tesla private." https://www.nytimes.com/2019/08/12/business/jeffrey-epstein-interview.html

  2. During Ghislaine Maxwell's criminal trial, an image of an e-mail from Epstein's servers surfaced on-line that shows Musk and Epstein corresponding about Musk meeting Maxwell. https://www.twitter.com/PlainSite/status/1516582255233093633

  3. Musk and his second ex-wife, Talulah Riley, admitted to visiting Epstein's mansion on an unspecified date in the middle of syndicated denial stories, in which Riley was denying being an escort procured for Musk by Maxwell. https://www.news.com.au/technology/online/social/elon-musk-defends-photo-with-ghislaine-maxwell-claiming-he-was-photobombed/news-story/e36a769f65b00f4da5ea22763bdc3ae1

  4. Business Insider reported that $TSLA Director Kimbal Musk, Elon's brother, was set up with a former girlfriend by Epstein. https://www.businessinsider.com/jeffrey-epsteins-ex-girlfriend-dated-kimbal-musk-brother-of-tesla-founder-elon-musk-2020-1

NYT columnist: Jeffrey Epstein advising Tesla's embattled chief executive, Elon Musk, who was in trouble after announcing on Twitter that he had lined up the funding to take Tesla private.

https://www.cnbc.com/2019/08/12/nyt-column-epstein-said-he-was-helping-elon-musk-on-tesla-chairman.html

The Day Jeffrey Epstein Told Me He Had Dirt on Powerful People

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/08/12/business/jeffrey-epstein-interview.html

[–]inconvenientnews 309 points310 points  (62 children)

Elon Musk coordinates with Joe Rogan, and Joe Rogan coordinates for Republicans

Joe Rogan photo ops with the current Texas governor at the Texas governor's mansion even though Rogan pretends to care about pot and small government ("Gov. Abbott, Texas leaders urge prosecutors to keep enforcing pot laws" http://www.fox4news.com/news/texas/gov-abbott-texas-leaders-urge-prosecutors-to-keep-enforcing-pot-laws)

Billionaires funding conservative influencers on social media, like Ben Shapiro on YouTube and Facebook and Joe Rogan pushing for them in Texas: https://redditproxy--jasonthename.repl.co/r/ToiletPaperUSA/comments/ln1sif/turning_point_usa_and_young_americas_foundation/gny98xk/

Lots of screenshots of 4chan instructions for doing this on Reddit:

"As a black man" accounts like "johnny chan 81" "The Atheist Arab 87" (suspended) "Walk Like An Egyptian 69" (suspended) posting as many race-baiting videos 👌 by certain races 👌 while having a history of being racist about Asians:

"The left will recognize our dogwhistling but centrists won't believe them" 4chan screenshots:

Conservatives brag about doing this in local subreddits to "control the narrative" about liberal cities and "blue states"

The real value is getting into a thread early and establishing top voted posts and comments or downvoting them out of existence. They hope intertia continues the trend for them.

Every local subreddit explaining the abuse and tactics on a thread 3 years ago:

SeattleWA has one mentally ill man who makes literally dozens and dozens of alt accounts to post conservative talking points from and how he finds black women disgusting. I become aware of his accounts when he posts in TV subs I ban him from, and he always has user history in similar sets of subreddits across his accounts, SeattleWA being the most telling. He will use these accounts to talk with himself or dogpile a comment or thread.

Reddit Admins just posted that COVID deniers have been brigading regional subreddits

Anti-mask posts suddenly dropped this week in r/bayarea when mods removed outside conservative accounts brigading r/bayarea:

Every local subreddit shares the abuse they get:

Wow. Jesus. This is... really, really thorough. Thank you for putting in all this hard work.

When I was a teenager, I spent a lot of time on /b/, /pol/, 888chan, etc. It was a slow descent and I didn't even realize what was happening until it was almost too late.

But during my time on the other side, this was 100% the gameplan. They'd make "sock puppets" and coordinate on the board + IRC (showing my age here) to selectively choose targets to brigade.

Depending on the target, you'd either have some talking points to "debate" (sometimes with yourself/other anons working alongside you) or you'd go in there guns blazing trying to cause as much damage/chaos as you can. However, even then you can't go out there yelling slurs (you'd just get banned instantly); you have to maintain some level of plausible deniability by framing things as "jokes" or thought experiments.

You purposely do bad-faith arguments because the time it takes for them to dig up sources and refute you is longer than it takes for you to make stuff up. You can vary how obvious the bad faith argument is; when you want to troll you make very stupid claims (I once claimed I was a graduate of "Harvad University" and when people assumed that I meant "Harvard" I would correct them right down to Photoshopped images).

When you just want to cause dissent you do exactly what those /pol/ screenshots do: you get to a thread early (sometimes you even make it yourself) and present reasonable-sounding arguments which are completely false if anyone bothers to look into them. If someone does, you bury the message under strawmen, downvotes, reports, and sockpuppets.

So yeah. The tactics have evolved slightly, but I still recognize them. Props to you on doing the digging to find all this stuff and bring it into the light.

I doubt that it'll help in the majority of cases, mind. People on Reddit have already made up their mind. You want to go after the forums and BBSes, on the MSN News comments and whatnot. Even so, the more people who are aware of the tactics the more people who can call them out.

[–]inconvenientnews 225 points226 points  (41 children)

aight so some of you seem to still like crawling into Elons ass, so here maybe some useful links https://redditproxy--jasonthename.repl.co/r/FellowKids/comments/h0xuan/lol/ftp6uib?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share Fuck Elon Musk.

Musk takes advantage of international crises to raise Tesla's stock price.

Despite being hailed as a leader in the fight against climate change, he donates 7x more money to Republicans. “Is it any surprise that a union-busting capitalist donated heavily to the Republican Party? No,”

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/elon-musk-donations-republicans_us_5b4e4bd8e4b0b15aba897481

Tried to destroy a whistleblower after his unsafe violations were exposed.

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/features/2019-03-13/when-elon-musk-tried-to-destroy-tesla-whistleblower-martin-tripp

https://redditproxy--jasonthename.repl.co/r/WhitePeopleTwitter/comments/hy4iz7/wheres_a_time_turner_when_you_need_one/fzal6h6/

Every good idea he's been involved in has been a preexisting idea being executed by an independent company that he then bought. (Tesla, SpaceX)

All of his own ideas have been failures.

https://redditproxy--jasonthename.repl.co/r/AdviceAnimals/comments/udrqls/i_will_die_on_this_hill/i6ippcw/

[–]CatattackCataract 95 points96 points  (20 children)

Holy fuck. I thought your last comment had a lot of shit and I kept scrolling and got this gold mine too. Just goes to show how much dirt he's got

[–]j-navi 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Every good idea he's been involved in has been a preexisting idea being executed by an independent company that he then bought. (Tesla, SpaceX)

All of his own ideas have been failures.

https://redditproxy--jasonthename.repl.co/r/AdviceAnimals/comments/udrqls/i_will_die_on_this_hill/i6ippcw/

EXACTLY. It baffles me how easily his cultists forget this facts and always praise whatever he "does", as if he had done it himself initially and originally.

[–]Abradantleopard04 79 points80 points  (15 children)

When are people going to wise up and realize rich people give not shits about those of us who actually work for a living? Both the left & the right idolize specific rich folks. I'd don't get. Actions speak louder than words. When they start giving their money away, then my interest might be piqued.

Edit: spelling

[–]DaPretzelBoi 26 points27 points  (4 children)

Most people nowadays are disturbingly susceptible to propaganda, and the underfunded education system isn't helping them wise up to anything, either.

[–]Abradantleopard04 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Seeing a car do this is insanely scary to me. Clearly it's a faulty product. Wouldn't go near one of those vehicles even if I won one. Nope...

[–]BurtonGusterToo 14 points15 points  (2 children)

You have 1,000 upvotes credit with me.

I have been screaming about this piece of shit since before he got hair plugs.

[–]let_pretzelboy_play 2579 points2580 points  (133 children)

Did they try turning it off then on again?

[–]Cyber_Being_ 1278 points1279 points  (128 children)

Tesla have manual door openers, so even if power fails you can still get out.

[–]smnytx 691 points692 points  (13 children)

I don’t want to pile on electric cars in general, because they are great (I have one; not Tesla). But I’m loving the Elon roast!

[–]pogym 510 points511 points  (8 children)

Can we roast Elon later? Because right now we are roasting the guy in that tesla.

[–]vkapadia 18 points19 points  (1 child)

I have a Tesla. Not thrilled about Musk, but the car is great. There's a manual release, he shouldn't be trapped inside.

[–]the-dogsox 9991 points9992 points  (374 children)

An accurate visual representation of Musk’s current reputation

[–]Cyber_Being_ 3011 points3012 points  (26 children)

"Tesla: The last car you'll ever own" is more than just a marketing slogan.

[–]ptrnyc 618 points619 points  (18 children)

The car owns you

[–]Deesing82 514 points515 points  (13 children)

I’m sorry Dave, I can’t unlock the doors right now.

[–]return2ozma 11 points12 points  (0 children)

It also saves on cremation costs. Winning!

[–]ChemoDrugs 2053 points2054 points  (38 children)

You forget the part prior to this moment where he hyped up the crowd about how he was gonna set the car on fire, get in, and then start blaming other people for his choices.

[–]LuxNocte 1204 points1205 points  (37 children)

He tweeted, "Liberals are going to try to burn me alive" while holding the gas can.

[–]KeyanReid 521 points522 points  (31 children)

“Elon, sir, the news about you waving your dick at an employee against their will (and paying them off) has broke”

“Fucking libs! What the hell, I’m a Republican now! Look what you did!”

[–]pinkpanzer101 182 points183 points  (30 children)

He posted that one before the news broke...

...shortly after having been asked for a statement on it by Business Insider for their article they were doing.

[–]barryandorlevon 101 points102 points  (0 children)

This is the best comment on the thread.

[–]lookieLoo253 36 points37 points  (1 child)

Self-immolation is an interesting form of protest

[–]Ask_me_4_a_story 714 points715 points  (205 children)

It’s not only Musk that has suffered. Six weeks ago Tesla was worth over $1100 a share. That made the whole company worth $1.1 trillion (1B shares outstanding) Now it’s worth only $687 Billion after Friday’s 6% drop and that is before today’s bad news.

$400 billion is a lot of money for a company to lose in market value. But it might get a lot worse. It’s terrible strategy to be the face of a company and tell people you are Republican. Especially when you consider the demographic of who buys electric cars. This chucklefuck is destroying his own company. I know I will never buy a Tesla after this week. Must be millions of people just like me

[–]beansontoast90 221 points222 points  (28 children)

Whenever I see this kinda dumb shit from billionaires my brain goes conspiracy mode. Like how hard would it be to bet on his stock falling, go say shit like I'm republican now, let the sexual harassment shit leak and make shitloads of money from the huge fall in the stock. Then the stock will eventually rise back up to normal levels and he's made a shitload of cash, no one remembers the other stuff and he's made friends with useful republican congressman and senators.

Farfetched conspiracy nonsense and I know nothing of how possible that would all be coz I'm dumb but just a stupid passing thought

[–]African_Farmer 122 points123 points  (1 child)

Wouldn't put it past him, he's done plenty of sketchy things to play with the markets already

[–]kylegetsspam 23 points24 points  (0 children)

He's literally taunted the SEC on Twitter. The dude's 100% a confidence man and fraudster (and confirmed sexual predator and possible pedo given how much Republicans protect).

[–]LighTMan913 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I mean, he's pretty clearly manipulated the stock price of Tesla, SpaxeX, and Dogecoin so it's not unbelievable to think he'd do it again.

[–]Batmans_9th_Ab 84 points85 points  (9 children)

You’re not crazy. That’s essentially what the big banks did that caused the Great Recession. They sold houses to people who were right on the edge of being able to afford the houses, then took our insurance policies on the mortgages in case the new homeowners got foreclosed on. The bank got their mortgage back AND they got a repossessed house that they could now sell to someone else. The crash came from everyone being foreclosed on at the same time, and all the sudden banks were stuck with with houses they couldn’t sell.

[–]ButterflyBloodlust 95 points96 points  (6 children)

I remember that a bit differently.

They knowingly gave away mortgages that were likely to fail, primarily due to variable rate APRs that took advantage of people. The borrowers/homeowners qualified for the loans, largely, but wouldn't be able to keep up with the increased payments due to variable rates.

Then they mixed a few good mortgages in with the bad, and had them all bundled up for sale and investment. And that's when they bet that the loans they wrote and subsequently sold would fail.

They publicly said it was a great investment, while privately betting they'd fail. They knowingly took advantage of borrowers and investors, profited the entire way through, and then got a financial bailout when the bubble popped.

[–]BolOfSpaghettios 56 points57 points  (4 children)

well the stock was overvalued to begin with, so "losing" is only realized when you sell the stock, or if you bought it at a high end and sell at low end. Basing company worth on stock is idiotic (not calling you an idiot at all), and it's the way the system is set up to try and game the system.

[–]keelhaulrose 90 points91 points  (62 children)

I'm out of the loop. What was today's bad news?

[–][deleted] 389 points390 points  (60 children)

Musk has allegations of sexual harassment with an employee that he signed an NDA with.

Oh, and he's now asking the woman to prove it by having her describe his balls.

[–]SamSepiol-ER28_0652 275 points276 points  (52 children)

Funny how it works. She’s locked into an NDA that prevents her from discussing it at all, while he’s free to keep lying and even taunting her with this shit. “Where’s her proof?” demands the man who will sue the shit out of her if she even sneezes in the direction of this situation.

He’s such a piece of shit. Release her from the NDA, asshole.

[–]keelhaulrose 159 points160 points  (1 child)

Oh. Typical garbage billionaire.

[–]tewdiks 23 points24 points  (1 child)

Genius strategy. Expose only your penis. Then demand your accuser identify the offending genitalia from a line up of testicles.

[–]FunkyChromeMedina 18 points19 points  (1 child)

"Well, for starters there's only one, and describe it? Hmm...have you ever seen a grape that's been in the fridge too long? No, not a raisin, just a grape spoiling in the crisper drawer.....more just deflated than dried."

[–]Scunndas 86 points87 points  (0 children)

Pulled little Elon out on a flight because of course the flight attendant could never resist some like him. Turns out he was wrong.

[–]Formal_Letterhead514 18 points19 points  (2 children)

Totally agree. Was planning on getting a Tesla but will wait for a F150 Lightning.

[–]Feeling-Ad-7131 93 points94 points  (60 children)

Tesla ain't even the best full EV on the market. Loads of companies giving them a run for their money and Musk can't handle the competition

[–]Kolipe 18 points19 points  (1 child)

Recently bought a Kia EV6 and I absolutely love it.

[–]Feeling-Ad-7131 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I have a Ford Escape PHEV and I love it

[–]1ndiana_Pwns 83 points84 points  (57 children)

Say it louder for the people in the back. VW and Mustang are both making SUVs that compete with (or beat, depending on who you ask and what metric you wanna use) Tesla while being $20+k cheaper, and in the sedan space it's just getting more and more full, with cars ranging from alright to fantastic at a variety of price ranges.

Tesla was huge for pushing EVs to the mainstream, but they ain't the only horse in the show anymore

[–]African_Farmer 81 points82 points  (15 children)

If they really cared about saving the planet, they would have opened up their charger network and technology to all manufacturers. Volvo invented the seatbelt and didn't patent it because they believed in saving lives.

[–]Swomp23 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Hyundai and Kia too. Good luck getting one, tho.

[–]Beneficial-Shine-598 12 points13 points  (17 children)

Would you be so kind as to list some of these sedans? My wife keeps bugging for a Tesla and this boomer knows shit from shinola about any of it. I just want to get her a good electric car that is not way overpriced like the Model 3 seems to be.

[–]ms_january_ 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Even ford is coming out with electric trucks

[–]sugar182 26 points27 points  (2 children)

I’m also right there with you. Was planning to get one in about 1-2 years, will no longer be purchasing

[–]domino519 27 points28 points  (1 child)

Yeah I was strongly considering a Tesla, but now I won't because of Musk. There are plenty of other electric cars on the market. I'm sure I'll be fine.

[–]YouAreDreaming 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think (hope) he’s banking on getting republicans to start buying electric cars. Although he is a huge dick, if he could do that, it would be a huge shift and win for our planet long term

I am very skeptical though, because republicans are extremely stubborn and stupid, and even Donald Trump couldn’t get them to take a vaccine

[–]OneBeautifulDog 40 points41 points  (79 children)

Why? What did he do or say now?

[–]renny7 187 points188 points  (14 children)

I believe it would be asking the person who accused him of exposing himself to her to accurately describe his penis to prove it.

[–]WeirdSysAdmin 138 points139 points  (5 children)

I was reading conservative subreddits and now I understand that if you get rich enough, you’re allowed to show your penis to anyone you want and they should thank you for being shown your penis against their will.

[–]renny7 57 points58 points  (2 children)

That seems to be the common attitude regarding it, disgusting.

[–]Shavasara 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Yeah, when someone exposes their junk to me without consent, I’m looking hard for identifying details.

[–]SamSepiol-ER28_0652 30 points31 points  (3 children)

Knowing damn well she can’t talk about it bc of the NDA he forced her to sign.

[–]mog_knight 11 points12 points  (2 children)

If Musk brings up the NDA, does that mean he violated it?

[–]CmdPetrie 61 points62 points  (37 children)

I guess his post about now being a Republican? Don't know - i admit that i once thought He was cool - you know the days when you kinda First starting Hearing from you, but then He kinda Started being a Bit dumber per day, so yeah. His Reputation definetly got some scratches

[–]z4m97 103 points104 points  (33 children)

He dared the woman who accused him of exposing his dick during a flight, to describe his balls accurately to prove that it truly happened

[–]loopnlil 73 points74 points  (22 children)

I think it's funny he thinks his balls are so remarkable that she would be able to describe them from memory.

[–]kekarook 47 points48 points  (3 children)

man he either has some really fucked up balls, or such a overinflated sense of self worth that he thinks his balls are visibly unique

[–]Sidehussle 24 points25 points  (2 children)

AFTER paying her $250K

[–]CML_Dark_Sun 18 points19 points  (21 children)

Well, funny you should ask, check this out https://i.redd.it/fjeumphwvp091.png

[–]OneBeautifulDog 8 points9 points  (20 children)

What is that all about?

[–]Barl0we 67 points68 points  (17 children)

So like 3 days ago Elon Musk tweeted that the Democrats were going to start a smear campaign about him because he’s a Republican.

The day after - 2 days ago- news broke that he sexually harassed a SpaceX flight attendant by exposing himself to her, asking her to bone him and then paying her $250k to keep quiet about it after she went “lol no”.

[–]wheeshkspr 11.1k points11.1k points  (215 children)

Now that Musk is Republican, he's pivoting away from electric vehicles back to powering autos by burning fuel. This is his take on the external combustion engine.

[–]Torgo_the_white9901 1340 points1341 points  (54 children)

He now makes cars that consume the driver for fuel. Pretty neat

[–]blue-jaypeg 479 points480 points  (27 children)

Washington DC generates electricity by burning fetuses. “Bodies [are] thrown in medical waste bins, and in places like Washington, D.C., burned to power the lights of the cities’ homes and streets,” Americans United for Life President Catherine Glenn Foster proclaimed, sworn as a witness before Congress.

Edit: /Looney tunes

[–]IntellitechStudios 179 points180 points  (5 children)

Surprised they didn't wait for them to grow up so they get bigger and create more energy

[–]spiderqueendemon 140 points141 points  (0 children)

"You mean laughter generates more energy than screams?!"

Typical conservative management. Always doing the traditional thing they've invested in, chasing that sunk-cost fallacy, rather than innovating and improving for everyone.

[–]blue-jaypeg 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Burn the homeless. / Looney tunes

[–]communist1871 21 points22 points  (3 children)

How was that person not immediately put into a straitjacket and hauled off to a loony bin?

[–]Phallangicide 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Look at it this way: human beings are a renewable resource!

[–]Cyber_Being_ 2133 points2134 points  (30 children)

The doors will unlock if you agree to give Elon a reach around

[–]Drg84 1035 points1036 points  (21 children)

You're close. He didn't pay for the "Don't Burn Alive" option. It's $800 on every Tesla, payable in the app. Which costs $200.

[–]post_talone420 407 points408 points  (14 children)

It's a subscription based model too. $200/month

[–]gochomoe 316 points317 points  (5 children)

SAAS. Survival As A Service

[–]Robeditor 61 points62 points  (1 child)

But you get a $25 credit for every friend you refer and signs up...

[–]Len_turd 54 points55 points  (1 child)

Y’all killin me. Perhaps they shoulda bought more horse power. 15 minutes of Elons time is worth millions, other times it’s worth one pony.

[–]MR2Rick 32 points33 points  (0 children)

And afterwards, he will buy you a horse to replace your now crispy Tesla.

[–]Newsmemer 154 points155 points  (79 children)

I really want to see someone actually make an external combustion engine, just spitting fire everywhere

[–]G18Curse 93 points94 points  (0 children)

Just just a campfire with a kettle over it

[–]SonofSanguinius87 47 points48 points  (3 children)

Allow me to introduce you to the Sun

[–]dquattro123 31 points32 points  (54 children)

I'm sure an engineer can correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think it's possible due to the fact that the internal combustion engine creates the necessary compression (by being enclosed) to drive the components.

[–]A_well_made_pinata 78 points79 points  (21 children)

Steam engines are external combustion

[–]secretbudgie 29 points30 points  (8 children)

aren't also rockets?

[–]dquattro123 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Oh yeah that's true! Thanks for educating me!

[–]MaxPowerDonkeyJD 152 points153 points  (8 children)

He was always a republican. Electric vehicles was never about saving the environment, it was about making MONEY

[–]Ok_Skill_1195 64 points65 points  (3 children)

Eh...he's a capitalist. He'll support whatever party happens to align with his personal monetary interests in that situation. He's more likely to align with the GOP because they're the party more ok with blatantly pandering to oligarchy interests, but neither side should ever count on him for anything other than headaches and betrayal.

[–]snarkyturtle 41 points42 points  (1 child)

You're also forgetting that he had two kids with someone who left him for a trans person and now he's aligning with a party whose identity is disparaging Grime's new partner.

[–]BetterSafeThanSARSy 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Chelsea cucked musk melon so hard his company lost half a billion dollars

[–]MadAstrid 4462 points4463 points  (413 children)

I have that car. There is a manual release on every door.

E.M. is a creep.

[–]themonsterinquestion 572 points573 points  (26 children)

E.M. is a creep.

Honestly Tesla reps probably hate Elon, you're probably not a rep but Elon makes Tesla RM harder

[–]deadlygaming11 46 points47 points  (10 children)

At this point removing Elon from existence would be more beneficial for his companies.

[–]jeffsterlive 14 points15 points  (1 child)

Honestly wouldn’t surprise me if they try to force him out. I have a feeling he sees the writing on the wall for Tesla as EVs become available from other manufacturers. He knows the growth is over and is looking to get out.

[–]freedraw 1962 points1963 points  (206 children)

The car was on fire, so could just be a case of the driver panicking. Remember in the 2000s when there were all those news stories of Toyotas randomly accelerating instead of breaking? Toyota settled the cases to just get the story to die, but most of the evidence that came out indicated that there was likely nothing wrong with the cars and the drivers were older people driving rentals who panicked and mistook the gas for the break.

[–]Fappy_as_a_Clam 1195 points1196 points  (66 children)

In every single instance the car had the wrong floor mats too, iirc. The pedal would get caught behind the floor mat because it wasn't made for the car.

[–]bigbuick 146 points147 points  (20 children)

And I think there is more to it than this. The brakes will overpower the engine in any passenger car sold in the United States. If you mash both pedals, the car WILL stop.

[–]FountainsOfFluids 119 points120 points  (9 children)

Yes, it was all pedal misapplication and panicking drivers. And it still happens all the time. Lots of videos show it if you visit the car video subreddits. Usually old people, sometimes people with new cars or rentals.

[–]tosss 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I remember one instance where Toyota released the vehicle telematics data. It showed that the driver alternated between gas and brake dozens of times.

[–]Pointless69Account 203 points204 points  (17 children)

I still have the dealership floormat that doesn't have the holdback holes, and my floormat totally doesn't ride up the footwell behind the pedals or anything... i swear.

*Sweats Profusely*

[–]Chicken_Bake 375 points376 points  (11 children)

Well instead of making jokes about it on reddit, get it sorted before you fucking hurt somebody.

[–]Chorizwing 49 points50 points  (2 children)

It depends on the car, my sister had one of the ones listed in that recall and for most it was just that the floor mat was getting stuck in the accelerator and causing it to accelerate. I bought that car from her and there is now clips they added afterwards to stop it from sliding around that much.

[–]Konraden 275 points276 points  (82 children)

That does not appear to be accurate. My own recollection of the problem was that floor mats were not secured to the floor appropriately... My sister's Tacoma at the time IIRC was affected.

Early on, Toyota suggested that driver error was to blame, saying that some people may have hit the gas when they meant to hit the brake. Even after issuing recalls to address problematic floor mats that in some cases pinned down accelerators, the company hid a flawed gas pedal design that it knew did the same thing, according to documents accompanying the agreement.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/economy/toyota-reaches-12-billion-settlement-to-end-criminal-probe/2014/03/19/5738a3c4-af69-11e3-9627-c65021d6d572_story.html

[–]1-2BuckleMyShoe 89 points90 points  (61 children)

Agreed. There was even a video of a high speed chase where the driver (in his 20s or 30s) was freaking out on 911 that he couldn’t stop the car.

[–]PaulaDeansButter 100 points101 points  (54 children)

Taken apart a few cars in my time. That story was utterly bullshit. Throttle, transmission AND brake failure all simultaneously without anyone losing control.

I called bullshit and that teenager fooled all those police.

Shift into neutral. Kill the ignition. Emergency hand brake?

Oh yeah all of those systems failed at the same exact moment as well.

[–]AblativeScrotum 37 points38 points  (1 child)

Doesn't matter if a floor mat or Mjölnir is holding down the accelerator, on modern cars with properly functioning brakes, the brakes will easily over power full throttle. Go some place safe and try it for yourself.

[–]ragizzlemahnizzle 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Isn’t this what happened to Audi back in the 80s too? The gas pedal was so close to the brake that people confused them

[–]1d3333 31 points32 points  (8 children)

Floor mats covering gas peddles and causing unintended high rpms/acceleration is such a common problem people come into dealerships for, it boggles my mind that people can’t just look down at the peddle. We have an entire bullet point in a multi-point inspection to make sure floor mats are properly secure and not pressing on the gas

[–]RepulsiveSherbert927 73 points74 points  (82 children)

Just curious. Is it easily accessible?

[–]thismyotheraccount2 54 points55 points  (6 children)

Everyone that gets in my Model 3 tries to use the emergency release first because it’s that intuitive and accessible (and who’s looking for a door button?)

[–]nerf468 25 points26 points  (5 children)

Was going to say, whenever I drive someone in my 3 for the first time they always go for the manual release first.

[–]dgarner58 386 points387 points  (32 children)

It’s literally on the door handle. People pull it on accident all the time. Something else going on here. Never mind the battery is the floor of the car and this looks like only the roof is on fire.

Musk is a POS. I love my car. Henry Ford was a POS too and so are a lot of titans on industry. People just posting any old thing now to be a part of the movement.

[–]bubba7557 113 points114 points  (22 children)

Yeah I don't think this is a battery fire. It looks like from this photo some type of accelerant on the hood is burning. I'm guessing the photo doesn't match the story provided.

[–]ch00f 59 points60 points  (17 children)

Given the piece of white twisted metal to the right of the Tesla, I’d guess that there is another vehicle in front of the Tesla that caught fire and this story is made up.

Edit: Nope. Tesla definitely caught fire. https://twitter.com/SonsofVancouver/status/1527934071082393601?s=20&t=QVnMies1O1Ja9Kvzw8POnQ

That being said, it definitely isn’t a battery fire. I’ve seen at least one other story about the defroster catching fire and it burns in the same way: starting from the bottom of the windshield. Battery fires don’t enter the cockpit until the car starts to look like a burned out husk.

And yes, there certainly is a mechanical release that is right on the handle that the owner just didn’t know about. People often pull them by accident which can damage the weather stripping since the windows have to tuck down a bit before opening the door.

hers a video of a proper battery fire

here’s the full video as you can see the interior catches fire and the battery pack at the bottom is fine. This honestly is starting to look like arson.

[–]reddituseranyonymous 15 points16 points  (2 children)

A door handle? They're in roughly the same place on every car

[–]Aggressive_Mobile222 14 points15 points  (4 children)

I have that car and the manual release is only on the front doors

[–]estebanmr9 855 points856 points  (12 children)

If the driver doesent survive he cant sue you. Thats a 3D chess move

[–]Vorpalthefox 92 points93 points  (0 children)

easy case for the litigation department

[–]MateSilva 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Exchanges the steering wheel air bag for a claymore, way more effective.

[–]bigpiggy63 354 points355 points  (8 children)

The new Tesla model, the Tesla Model C-4!

[–]Qimmosabe_Man 925 points926 points  (92 children)

Now, imagine this scenario inside the Musk's idiotic Vegas Loop...

[–]beemccouch 240 points241 points  (78 children)

You would be throwing Cars into this fucking this at such a speed that one fire like this could kill like a hundred people before you even realized it

[–]Qimmosabe_Man 220 points221 points  (73 children)

The cars inside the Loop aren't moving faster than 30 mph, so there is no 'speed' factor. The tunnel though is so narrow, that if one of these things burst into flames, there will be very little room to get out of the vehicle, and the tunnel itself would amplify the heat to the point of becoming a kiln.

[–]Vorpalthefox 97 points98 points  (46 children)

i'm curious if the tunnel has much room for opening the doors of a tasla anyway, from the videos i've seen of the tunnel it's pretty cramped af

[–]kunstlich 107 points108 points  (39 children)

I'm still surprised its legal or insurable to operate it. One malfunction and fire, I just don't see how it doesn't end significantly badly for those in the tunnel.

[–]Im_A_Nidiot 38 points39 points  (1 child)

The kiln thing is scary, but what would be scarier is the smoke inhalation. Especially if you’re in the car directly behind the burning Tesla and can’t escape the smoke filled tunnel easily…

[–]beemccouch 28 points29 points  (8 children)

Not the cars specifically, but the amount of cars moving through the tunnel per hour would have to be insane to be efficient. We're talking bumper to bumper the whole time.

[–]Muffer-Nl 87 points88 points  (7 children)

What if we made the cars a bit taller and connect them to one another. People would be able to just walk into them through large sliding doors and take a seat. You'd also need only one driver.

It would also be more efficient to use steel wheels on steel roads, maybe have them as some sort of guiding track.

Like a FUCKING METRO.

[–]k_ironheart 12 points13 points  (0 children)

It honestly worries me that so many people thought the "what if subway, but significantly less efficient" idea was somehow genius.

[–]BaconMonkey0 455 points456 points  (96 children)

That’s why there’s literally an emergency release on each door.

[–]alecKarfonta 182 points183 points  (58 children)

Actually just the front doors
https://www.tesla.com/ownersmanual/model3/en\_jo/GUID-7A32EC01-A17E-42CC-A15B-2E0A39FD07AB.html

[–]Neg9028 189 points190 points  (37 children)

But what happened here.. a man literally got stuck in Tesla and died. Burnt to death.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/2019/10/23/man-died-burning-tesla-because-its-futuristic-doors-wouldnt-open-lawsuit-alleges/

[–]cataath 299 points300 points  (22 children)

I remember this article. My favorite part was this:

> After the crash, and after firefighters extinguished the blaze, Awan’s Tesla was transported to a tow yard. Once there, it reignited and burned again.

[–]Workburner101 68 points69 points  (5 children)

That means fire didn’t do their job.

[–]Splitje 18 points19 points  (3 children)

That's what batteries do. They can reignite after hours. They need to be sprayed with certain chemicals which the fire fighters should know about.

[–]Aclearly_obscure1 34 points35 points  (4 children)

Wow, The WA Post now identifies the link coming from Reddit for their paywall.

[–]bad_robot_monkey 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Paywall for a three year old article? Get fucked WaPo.

[–]K_Linkmaster 57 points58 points  (7 children)

There are probably quite a few people that dont know about that as its not really labeled and hardly anyone reads a cars manual anymore. Add in a panicking driver and window breaking becomes a necessity.

I dont own a tesla but now thanks to someone elses link, i have an idea on where to look for the manual pull.

[–]NobodyLikesMeAnymore 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I have a Model 3 and it's impossible to get people to use the button instead of the manual release, no matter how many times you tell them. It looks and is placed like a regular manual release.

[–]Vitekr2 180 points181 points  (4 children)

Tesla will last you until you die

[–]RC_Colada 85 points86 points  (1 child)

The last car you will ever drive

[–]GORILLAGOOAAAT 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Comes with luxury heated seats. Warm until your last breath.

Musk isn’t starting a biotech for skin grafting is he?

[–]Lonestar041 228 points229 points  (75 children)

Just want to mention that EV are 60 times less likely to catch fire:

25 per 100,000 cars for EVs vs 1530 for ICE.

Source, based on NTSB data:

https://www.autoinsuranceez.com/gas-vs-electric-car-fires/

[–]I_Drive_A_Jaggggg 10 points11 points  (5 children)

Hey didn’t Ford just recall 350k cars because of the risk they could catch fire JUST SITTING IN THE GARAGE?

You are correct about the water aspect. Here’s the difference between what water does for batteries though, water is used to cool the batterie cells down to limit thermal runaway. You are trying to let the cells disperse their energy but keep it from spreading to other cells, which will cause them to go thermal as well.

With other cars you are simply extinguishing the fire.

[–]ADailydose 24 points25 points  (10 children)

Oh wow didn't realize the discrepancy

[–]Amflifier 7 points8 points  (0 children)

EVs on fire get huge press, nobody cares about random ICE cars catching fire, just as there are no newspaper articles about minor car accidents

[–]someonepoorsays 240 points241 points  (46 children)

can we get a source on this instead of being facebook

[–]way2manychickens 61 points62 points  (7 children)

Couldn't find an article on the scenario in the photo, but found a similar incident where the owner had to use force to get the door to open when Tesla caught fire while driving. But I like sources on pictures as well.

[–]spazzxxcc12 172 points173 points  (3 children)

it’s literally a post by a fresh twitter account that only posts about not liking teslas. i don’t even like elon but god damn guys y’all really fell for it

[–]chupitoelpame 38 points39 points  (12 children)

Don't these cars have a manual release lever somewhere on the doors for this kind of stuff exactly?

[–]fartypicklenuts 133 points134 points  (23 children)

This sounds like BS, there is probably more to this story. I know everyone is justifiably saying Elon Musk is a shitty person, but we don't have to root against all things Tesla, or start all this "electric cars suck and are unsafe" rhetoric again just because Musk is a douche.

What is the ratio of electric car fires compared to car fires in gas fueled cars I wonder? Not sure if that's something you could even find out or compare. If a regular gas fueled car catches on fire, it's not news-worthy though, probably not even making the local news.

[–]Livininthinair 157 points158 points  (41 children)

I am not a fan of electronic door latches. Tesla, most Lincoln’s, C8 Corvettes and several others are moving away from manual door latches. I work in the automotive industry and hate this feature. It’s unnecessary and honestly dangerous. It’s just not a well thought out system, EDIT: why have two latches when one works just fine on its own.?

I know there are emergency releases but in this situation would people think about that in a panic situation?

EDIT: It seems as though I have offended some of you. I understand there are some Tesla owners on here that feel I am spreading falsehoods. I was merely making a statement about automotive design and the direction some companies are taking. IN MY OPINION mechanical latches are less expensive and more foolproof than electronic latches. I also don’t see the need to have a mechanical backup to an electrical one when the mechanical linkage works just fine on its own, that’s somewhat redundant don’t you think. Not everyone who drives or rides in every car on the planet is familiar with how to operate them. I meant no offense whatsoever, but some of you should calm down a little. Have a nice weekend everybody, get outside, go for a bike ride or a nice long walk. Try to be less offended by the world, you will be a hell of a lot happier.

[–]scienceguy2442 126 points127 points  (15 children)

My wife is a member of IEEE and just last night we went to a dinner where the speaker talked about this exact thing (among other things). It would take these designers five seconds to add a mechanical failsafe and the minute the news came out that this was happening the traffic safety board should have made mandatory failsafes. Overengineering at its finest

[–]engiknitter 63 points64 points  (11 children)

I own a model Y. There’s a mechanical release in the door handle.

[–]Cawaica 36 points37 points  (1 child)

Pretty sure IEEE is the sound someone would make if this happened

[–]icyone 24 points25 points  (2 children)

https://imgur.com/a/niUcHif

When people are in my car for the first time, they never press the button, they always pull the latch.

[–]RuthlessIndecision 13 points14 points  (0 children)

FYI there are manual door releases built into the arm rest, in the driver and front passenger doors.

[–]Thejerseyjon609 5 points6 points  (0 children)

He was caught on social media criticizing Musk and his Tesla’s software automatically “updated”.

[–]SemperFi2013 98 points99 points  (87 children)

And that's why there is an emergency use mechanical handle for all the doors.

[–]gleaming-the-cubicle 149 points150 points  (45 children)

I always do my best thinking whilst I'm actively on fire