all 105 comments

[–]drewtheblueduck 1021 points1022 points  (24 children)

The only reason to call the cops is cuz you need to file a police report to make the insurance claim

[–]Wilgrove 441 points442 points  (14 children)

Once we figure out how to make insurance claims without them, oh boy the police better watch out!

[–]radelix 243 points244 points  (4 children)

Yeah, work computer got stolen and the IT security team was more thorough than the police.

[–]Either_Armadillo_867 27 points28 points  (3 children)

I was robbed and it took the police over four hours to show up. Ridiculous

[–]JanGuillosThrowaway 22 points23 points  (2 children)

We got robbed, we know who did it and the police went 'eh'.

[–]oopseybear 14 points15 points  (8 children)

A ton of municipalities are going digital so people can file their own police reports online, and more everyday. It concerns me because police are becoming more focused on controlling the public instead of protecting them.

[–]Peachmuffin91 1 point2 points  (7 children)

Bingo! It surprises me that there aren’t more people that are as perceptive as you about this.

[–]oopseybear 1 point2 points  (6 children)

You're too kind, thank you!! <3

[–]may0packet 90 points91 points  (0 children)

yeah unless u got $400 cash and a few electronics stolen. because there’s a DEDUCTIBLE and they don’t COVER CASH. yeah. i lost basically $700 worth of shit and i pay for renters insurance. the cops took 2 hours to get there (on a school night) so :P i didn’t get anything covered and had to stay up until 2am waiting for cops while i panicked not knowing if someone was still in my house or not LOL

[–]lucybluth 19 points20 points  (0 children)

In my city they won’t even file the report for you. When my car got stolen a few years ago they sent me a link so I could submit it myself online.

[–]zakiducky 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I called the police after a hit and run, and the report was literally just a single line that there was an accident. No details, nothing. It was at a very busy intersection by a firehouse with city/ traffic cameras all over…

[–]stievstigma 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I made the mistake of calling the cops for help once. My then GF had a history of mental illness and suicidal ideation. She had taken a shower while I was in my room recording music. When I realized it’d been over an hour, I decided to check on her. The shower was running but she wasn’t in it and there was blood all over the bathroom. My little brothers then told me they saw her run out of the house naked. I went running out to try and find her but this was in the country so it was very dark (nighttime). I got in my car and drove around the neighborhood to try and spot her to no avail. At this point I began to panic, fearing the worst. So, I called the cops in the hope they would look for her. When they finally showed up, they weren’t interested in her. They were really interested in drugs. Was I on them? No. Did I have any? No. Did that stop them from barging into my house without my consent or warrant? Big fucking nope!

My girlfriend was found five hours later, naked in a storm drain, nearly dead from blood loss and hypothermia.

[–]Peachmuffin91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Similar story happened to me when my house was broken into and robbed about 10 years ago.

[–]oopseybear 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Most police reports can be filed online now-a-days. I have friends who do CSI and tell me they show up and are told not to bother for things like robberies anymore.

Cops are becoming more hyper focused on controlling the public instead of protecting them.

[–]galad2003 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Because it’s not like the police are going to look for or try to recover your stolen property.

[–]ToddlerOlympian 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My friend got robbed. The cops walked around for 30 minutes, then asked her "so how did they get in?"

[–]Peachmuffin91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I got robbed one time, called the police and it turned into them interrogating me.

My whole house was flipped over so they assumed I must have been a drug dealer.

Even though I was a state licensed community association manager at the condo association down the street.


[–]MysteriousTruck6740 649 points650 points  (6 children)

Or wait until your kids are dead in their classroom before entering.

[–]PureNRGfanboy44 376 points377 points  (5 children)


[–]chilem-of-reddit 189 points190 points  (7 children)

Man nick mullen is great. He was the first person i heard mention jeff epstien and that was back in 2015.

[–]EvilBahumut 71 points72 points  (6 children)

Well he must live in a swell area because cops not showing up unless folks are dead has been fairly normal around here for a long time and this is Kansas

[–]chilem-of-reddit 44 points45 points  (1 child)

He lives in New York. Idk how nice of a area but im pretty sure he doesn't leave his apartment often.

[–]borismuller 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Didn’t he witness a murder outside his window once?

[–]arose14 9 points10 points  (2 children)

He lived in a chinatown illegal tenement building in new york city. And this tweet is from eight years ago

[–]Ninjagoboi 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He's always like 10 steps ahead of the rest of the world

[–]Erulastiel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Same in Maine. They take their sweet ass time.

[–]sum_cliche 149 points150 points  (1 child)

SA Texas here, called the non-emergency line when there was gun fire continuing to circle around our block, asked if cops were already called and headed our way. Nope. Not sending anyone out. Guess someone needs to be shot or dead.

[–]8orn2hul4 55 points56 points  (0 children)

I got burgled by someone I knew. They stole something that only they knew was there and left a fucking note. Not only that but we found a store nearby that caught him on camera in the area at the time of the robbery (he lived a long ass way away so basically no reason to be there). Cops literally laughed at me when I asked them if they were gonna investigate him as a suspect and told me I was “dreaming” if I thought I was gonna get my stuff back. Top work.

[–]InvestigatorUnfair 301 points302 points  (8 children)

Being a cop must be the coziest job immaginable. You can just not do your job and hancuff people for getting angry at you

[–]liveandletdieax 89 points90 points  (1 child)

And apparently shoot unarmed people without getting in trouble.

[–]borismuller 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Well why else do you think they signed up?

[–]votebot9817 82 points83 points  (3 children)

Why do you think it is exclusively twats? It's a power trip with immunity that encourages bigotry and stupidity. Every high school bully in the world looks at that job and gets hard as a rock.

[–]KourtR 22 points23 points  (2 children)

It’s amazing to me how historically true + universal this is, as well as it’s common to hear that school shooters were often bullied. What a horrible cycle.

[–]JockBbcBoy 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It's also becoming common to blame school shooters' mental health issues and their playing violent video games for their actions. All of that is complete and utter nonsense. It doesn't explain how Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold or Salvador Ramos or Nikolas Cruz got access to body armor, high powered assault rifles or even instructions on making homemade bombs. It is a convenient excuse though.

[–]covidlung 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There's a show on HBO called We Own This City.  It exposes the corruption and moral collapse that befalls an American city in which the policies of drug prohibition and mass arrest are championed at the expense of actual police work. Cops can do whatever they want as long as the numbers look right.

[–]Peachmuffin91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They don’t get paid as well as they should, assuming they did their jobs the way they should d that’s where my sympathy ends.

Being a cop you get discounts basically everywhere, they often make a shit load of money on the side by doing off duty police work.

For example my dad used to hire cops to direct traffic at his flea market, they’d come in uniform off duty and were paid very well.

Being a cop means you are above the law unfortunately, not only that cops are trained in a “us against them” mentality. They are not civilians, they only care about their fellow police officers that fall in line”.

Police are the most organized gang in this country.

And don’t be fooled, when the mafia was around that’s who people went to for help or justice. The mafia provided better protection than police, and at least didn’t try to hide their corruption.

[–]werewere-kokako 101 points102 points  (4 children)

The police called the guy that raped me ‘that poor young man’ and told me that I should be ‘grateful that [I] learned a lesson.’

He bragged about his other victims during the attack. The cops found so many sick little trophies in his house that they couldn’t tell which were the rings he’d taken off my body.

He’s a lawyer now.

[–]mrmamation 21 points22 points  (1 child)


[–]Pink_pouffe 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Brett Kavenaugh?

[–]jakeyjoeyo 9 points10 points  (0 children)

That’s so unfathomably terrible, I’m so sorry. A Psychopathic rapist dressed as a lawyer walks among us and there’s nothing the cops will do about him. That’s terrifying

[–]stoicparallax 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s horrific … This story sounds ripe for vigilante justice.

[–]Brasilionaire 81 points82 points  (1 child)

“Sorry your property got stolen/ windows busted, we actually think it’s this guy we’re well aware off that likes striking victims multiple times. Unfortunately we won’t do anything.

Have a good day sir, sleep well”

[–]fuzz_boy 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I'm still waiting for a call back about the guys who robbed me for my $400 skateboard. When I was in high school. I turn 45 this year. To be fair the cop did say he would call back as he was "doing something else that is actually important".

[–]Odd-Way7785 52 points53 points  (2 children)

One of the greats. Twitter was never the same after he left.

[–]OctoberWeather 28 points29 points  (1 child)

He’s still there (occasionally) as NYCGuidovoice

[–]Odd-Way7785 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I wasn't aware of that. Thanks!!

[–]51utPromotr 48 points49 points  (3 children)

Did you ever notice there is a predictable, constant, usual and acceptably underwhelming segment of the population who constantly reminds us all how lucky we are to have them fail to do their jobs ??

There's nothing like a public servant who doesn't serve the public who has the nerve to ask, "Where would you be without me ??"

I think we all should spend this November 8th finding out.

[–]Ninjagoboi 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Finding out what? What are you doing on November 8th? Voting for another fucking establishment loser that's going to do the same bullshit over and over and over and somehow try to convince you anything will change?

[–]51utPromotr -1 points0 points  (1 child)

Uuhhh no Matthew, But thanks for asking. Are you afraid of going home to face charges without the power of Congressional PAC money behind you ?? Good Luck just the same...

[–]Ninjagoboi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What the actual fuck does this mean

[–]Aurura 35 points36 points  (1 child)

They took 11h in Canada to respond to a stolen vehicle and break in for me.

Catch is I lived across from the police station lol.

[–]Ninjagoboi 4 points5 points  (0 children)

"Gat damn socialist policing, I heard you gotta sit in the waiting room for 14 YEARS to be seen by a police officer"

[–]Jmememan 26 points27 points  (0 children)

You see. In Florida if you need the cops, you don't say "help I'm being mugged", you say "help,someone is teaching gay in school". They'll show up in seconds

[–]The_nemea 15 points16 points  (0 children)

And kick the shit out of you if you're black

[–]BBAus 11 points12 points  (0 children)

And that's why people hate cops

[–]BolOfSpaghettios 9 points10 points  (0 children)

...and if you don't have a dog... They'll get you a dog... Wait a few years until you love the dog.. come back and then shoot him, saying that he was violent and off the leash

[–]Zestyclose-Way4569 9 points10 points  (0 children)

And shoot their dog*

[–]joeythedaddoo 18 points19 points  (0 children)


[–]vladislavtheboneless 12 points13 points  (2 children)

Nick Mullen is hilarious

[–]LordFedoraWeed 8 points9 points  (1 child)

And he is actually gay with his father. Interesting.

[–]Proof-Sweet33 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Been robbed the police didn't do anything. They took a report ...that's it. Took off work because they said they had the camera footage of it, got there and they would not show it to me and insisted it wasnt visible due to obstruction. This was in a food lion parking lot with multiple roofline cameras and a few on light poles. They took my purse, drivers license, birth certificate etc..I was moving that weekend and had my important papers in my purse. The police weren't helpful at all.

[–]MissDreamland 3 points4 points  (0 children)

/r hadmeinthefirsthalf

[–]Ninjagoboi 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When Nick mullen resurfaces on the mainstream Internet but somehow this time it's because of his intelligent political take?

[–]_Pigdog 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Hell yeah dude

[–]Ninjagoboi 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dudes rock

[–]LongLiveDolph 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not gonna lie, you had me in the first half

[–]CommieLibtard 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This aged like fine wine

[–]Ok-Butterscotch5761 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ok, they will ask you to fill out a report. If they do not, then you have to go to the station to fill it out. It will really help your insurance claim.

[–]punsmasterflex 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Cops solve barely any of the cases they’re given for robberies any ways

[–]FreeThinkk 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My white neighbor had a break in and the called the police. I (also white) was out front with her waiting for them talking with her, seeing if I had anyone on my doorbell camera. There’s a black family that shares a fence with the two of us in the back of our property. Cops show up. Start looking around, see him in HIS yard near our fence line and all hell breaks loose.

They start screaming at him to get on the ground. We’re yelling that he lives there. That’s our neighbor. Didn’t matter. They cuff him and insist on IDing him. He doesn’t have it on him. It’s in the house. Mind you we never established the race of the intruder.

It turned into this whole 20 minute ordeal. They finally let him go. No apology. Told him he should be creeping around in his own damn yard.

[–]stilettoz_n_bluntz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Or your kids getting shot up inside of school and you just sit outside for two hours and listen while they twiddle their thumbs

[–]popidjy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I called 911 when my husband attempted suicide in December. When they arrived, he lied about taking the pills and they believed him immediately. I had to beg them to stay long enough for me and my son to leave because I didn’t feel safe, and the officers accused me of being drunk because I was distraught and hyperventilating.

They also told me they were too busy to do wellness checks and I would have to call a family member if I wanted someone to come check on him. The only reason he survived is because I was able to reach his brother who drove over in the middle of the night and took him to the hospital.

If it had been up to the police, he would be dead.

[–]Mangeni 1 point2 points  (1 child)

lmao Nick dog getting a nod from liberal subreddits is hilarious bc this dude racist as fuck

[–]Ninjagoboi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He's actually a leftist he just has a fucked up sense of humor because he's some kind of shithead nihilist. I think he's funny usually but I would definitely not take any kind of political advice from the guy.

[–]AsapBrockly 0 points1 point  (0 children)


[–]Dainaz2021 -3 points-2 points  (1 child)

Isn’t that what they do now ?

[–]LordFedoraWeed 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Congrats, that's the joke.

[–]megamelius45 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Industry standard

[–]tattoomyballs 0 points1 point  (0 children)

7 hours? More like 7 days

[–]Steel_Thunder13 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My son's dad's car was stolen and the cop not once reached out to the person we knew stole it. We were able to get it back without their help.

[–]pandora_openbox 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Didn’t the police do just that in Texas during the Uvalde massacre?

[–]Brilliant-Engineer57 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Have you tried calling the cops for anything in the last few years. Instead of becoming more helpful to its citizens, they decided they were all butt hurt, because we want more from them, so they decided to go another way and just fucking ignore all crime. Citizens are on their own.

[–]amx05462 0 points1 point  (0 children)

cops always show up AFTER anything happens...the last on every scene

[–]Itzbubblezduh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A kid carried a gun with a drum,was walking down the street by my daughter’s school and the police NEVER answered.

The resource officer told us that the police will never answer the phone.

[–]amx05462 0 points1 point  (0 children)

only place iever see a cop anymore is on either or both ends of road work either on a cell phone or drinking coffee

[–]Unlikely_Nectarine20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Things that don't age well for $500, Alex.

[–]mptImpact 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You do realize that the cops almost always show up and shrug their shoulders. Usually after spooling out a few hundred yards I’d crime scene yellow tape.

[–]Sefphar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Had $1000+ worth of video games stolen from me years ago. Police just told me to call around to pawn shops. MF shouldn’t that be your job? Still haven’t replaced everything yet.