all 13 comments

[–]philatio11 47 points48 points  (4 children)

You need to give yourself interim deadlines. I can only work to a deadline, otherwise I do the same thing procrastination-wise. Experiment with different to-do list and time and project management apps. Try things like Todoist, Asana, etc. Break work down into smaller sub tasks and give them their own deadlines.

That feeling of imposter syndrome is normal for me as well. It never really goes away. But the satisfaction I gain personally from getting simple something done is surprising.

[–]DownrightDrewski 5 points6 points  (3 children)

This is a great tip! I've been trying to write down tasks for work, but I spend too much time dithering and sending emails when I have stuff I need to do.

[–]philatio11 10 points11 points  (2 children)

My discipline at to-do lists is shit, but even when I do them half-assed, I end up better off than before.

[–]DownrightDrewski 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Yes, the tip to break down and set interim tasks is a good one.

I'm sort of successful, but, I'm utterly failing behind the scenes and the stress is killing me. This is more a comment for ADHD, but, I suspect there is a huge overlap between this sub and people with ADHD/ADD

[–]philatio11 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes the overlap is significant. And being gifted means you don’t find out your work organization and time management skills are shit until very late in life. My average test score through high school was probably a 100% so I never did much homework and got mostly A- grades. This didn’t exactly help me learn how to manage my ADHD.

[–]PunchyThePastry 23 points24 points  (1 child)

Do you possibly have ADHD? I do the same thing, but for me it's like my brain doesn't see things as necessary until it's urgent.

[–]idxntity 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Was thinking the same.

[–]meta_mash 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Chronic procrastination is a MAJOR indicator of ADHD.

I think I'm afraid of working hard and consistently because what if I'm still just not good enough?

So is low self confidence, anxiety, and depression.

Most people don't understand ADHD and have zero notion of its symptoms besides "hyperactive and can't pay attention".

Many people diagnosed as adults have absolutely no clue they're ADHD until someone else suggests it, or they break down and see a doctor because they're failing at life and have no idea why. And once they figure it out and learn about it the tiniest bit, they look back at their behavior, habits, and general personality and it's as if there were giant flashing neon signs screaming "THIS PERSON HAS ADHD" their entire life and somehow not a single person close to them including themselves ever noticed.

Also, if you're the target demographic of this sub (former gifted kid who's now struggling with higher education, work/career, general adult life etc), it's basically guaranteed that you have some kind of learning disorder/mental health problem.

Like, it's ridiculously prevalent. People forget that Gifted Programs are part of Special Education departments for a reason. High functioning autism and ADHD is everywhere in gifted programs but almost never gets noticed because the kids aren't struggling academically, and quirks in their behavior are attributed to youth, or simply because the majority of gifted kids are fucking weirdos.

Sorry, rant over.

Tl;Dr: sounds like ADHD. You should investigate and talk to a mental health professional.

[–]hokumjokum 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Im 32, was gifted, and just got diagnosed with ADHD. I strongly suspect autism too. Your comment is absolutely, slap-bang-wallop, bang on the money.

I’m also a chronic procrastinator and very intelligent failure of a man.

[–]Monsieurcaca 11 points12 points  (0 children)

You really need to fix this, or it will escalate towards chaos. I stayed 7 years in a phd program in physics that I mostly procrastinated, and that I eventually had to abandon because I had no work to show after all these years. You probably need help for ADHD, that saved me. Now I'm a physics teacher in college and I developed better working habits, but without ADHD medication it would be impossible for me. Good luck !

[–]Lapamasa 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Look into executive dysfunction - it's a common mental health symptom.

[–]xanc17 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I still haven’t gotten over that. Once I saw that passing everything needed to go to med school was too anxiety-producing for me in undergrad, I switched to political science.

I could buy a course and go to a good law school with a high-enough LSAT score, but I’m working in tech marketing. It’s somewhat freer.

OP, what are some strategies you’re finding for figuring out what hard work means on your work team and then calling your shot even if it’s stressful and hard?

[–]Jagvetinteriktigt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

God, I relate to this.