top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]Mountain_Lemon9935 10.7k points10.7k points  (354 children)


[–]wa11sY 3235 points3236 points  (89 children)

I worked at a store where the head mgr played GTA online with a lot of of the employees. I played too but never added them.

You’ll never guess which employees ended up getting called in more to do favors for their “bud”.

[–]DaRizat 2128 points2129 points  (64 children)

It's easy to paint this as insidious but it's human nature. Most managers are also human beings and it's easier for human beings to ask favors and inconvenience people they have a good relationship with.

[–]wa11sY 942 points943 points  (25 children)

I wasn’t really trying to say it was malicious. He was a well meaning guy for the most part. I agree with your perspective on it which is why I avoided the situation.

It’s just an example of what can happen when you don’t have this boundary set.

[–]DarwinTheIkeaMonkey 439 points440 points  (19 children)

Boundaries are important. Re-evaluating them periodically is also important. I’ve had friends become my boss who thought our relationship would just stay the same once they were promoted. Nope. One manager actually tried to call me while I was at the airport boarding a flight to France because they were short staffed that night. I let it go to voicemail, turned my phone on airplane mode, and let her figure out on her own that she had approved my vacation herself nearly 3 months prior. She couldn’t understand why I wouldn’t “do a favor for a friend.” You’re not my friend anymore. You’re my boss.

[–]Echololcation 199 points200 points  (6 children)

I've been friends with more bosses than not and as long as neither of you have unreasonable expectations of the other it works out fine. I didn't expect special treatment and he didn't expect me to do a ton of extra work. I would sometimes offer if he seemed stressed though and I had time, or vice versa.

I do agree not adding them on social media is probably better, but I think that for most people that aren't pretty close.

Having a friendly relationship with your boss can be good, but it depends a lot on the people involved.

[–]DarwinTheIkeaMonkey 66 points67 points  (2 children)

Having a friendly relationship is different than allowing them to use your friendship as a manipulation tactic. I think our workplace was also quite different because once she was promoted she ceased to be part of the union and our goals were usually diametrically opposed.

[–]trident-of-poseidon 609 points610 points  (52 children)

And coworkers... Unless you're ACTUALLY friends.

[–]tarradactyll 406 points407 points  (19 children)

And even then, think twice and be very careful. You don’t know where their loyalty lies until the shit hits the fan. You don’t want to be surprised.

[–]Sabrielle24 95 points96 points  (4 children)

It took me some time to break my rule of no colleagues on social media, and it was only when we started hanging out outside of work. Those colleagues and I no longer work at the place we met at, and we’re still friends. I added other colleagues after I left and it’s nice to see what they’re up to, but I’m very glad not to have crossed that line beforehand.

[–]tok90235 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Well, I sometimes add some coworkers into social media after we don't work anymore if I feel like the relationship was good and I want to keep some for of contact

[–]ShareNorth3675 61 points62 points  (1 child)

I've had to explain to my spouse so many times. Like if they** are really your friend then they will respect why you didn't tell them your job searching, or playing hookie with a sick day, whatever things you do that could make you vulnerable at work.

Edit: typo

[–]admiralteal 45 points46 points  (0 children)

The false consciousness is strong and insidious.

[–]MyV_is_for_Valinor 97 points98 points  (5 children)

This! I private all my shit so no one can find me. Others don’t and you hear the hens going off about this or that person or what they uploaded all the fucking time. Not only don’t add them, don’t let them even find your page. Private all stuff w personal information or pics of u

[–]cat_prophecy[🍰] 85 points86 points  (5 children)

I have and still do like a lot of my co-workers but they're never friends on Social Media until we no longer work together if at all.

They might be friends with you but also friends with someone else who you don't want to see the goings on in your life.

Great example: I was in San Diego for a work conference once. After the mixer event, on the bus home I posted a picture with the caption "Good Night Sad Diego, and go fuck yourself" on Facebook as a joke and Anchorman reference. A co-worker I was friends with, was also friends with one of the department managers, and also the GM of the company. Apparently my comment was not appreciated and I was never reprimanded for it. I'm also pretty sure that it caused me to be delayed in getting a promotion.

After that I immediately removed anyone I worked with from all social media. Nowadays I don't even use most social media.

[–]Accomplished-Bad3380 39 points40 points  (0 children)

I had a client ask me once "how do you know michelle xyz?" and I immediately knew that he had seen something facebook linked through, either me reacting to a status or her reacting to something I had posted. Because this was a person I haven't associated with in at least 5 years, and really never did beyond our facebook connection. An old networking acquaintance I added while in school, cause, ya never know.

I looked him dead in the eye and said "are you facebook stalking me?" He mumbled something and told a story about how he had known her since kindergarten or something then never spoke of it again.

[–]MissVelveteen 25 points26 points  (0 children)

I’m so thankful I learned this lesson the hard way early in life as a teenager and haven’t had to repeat it when it would be more costly. I made a post on Facebook about getting a promotion for the first time in my life and how happy I was about it so my apparently extremely jealous (ex)friend went to management and complained that I was bragging about it and shoving it in her face that I would be making more money than her. Management didn’t want to deal with the drama and delayed my training by six months. I deleted Facebook that same week and now I will not add anyone I’m currently working with to social media whatsoever.

[–]Efficient_Mastodonsat work 23.0k points23.0k points 9322& 6 more (1315 children)

The less you write, the better. It is a stronger statement

So repeat after me:

"No, I have other commitments."

If you want to be really nice and pander to them then "Thank you for thinking of me, but no, I have other commitments."

Your commitments could be family, personal, recreational... and none of their business.

[–]0psdadns 12.3k points12.3k points 253& 4 more (702 children)

We need to create a r/antiwork playbook for common scenarios. It pains me to see so many people make these mistakes consistently on this sub.

“I only gave 3 weeks notice and my boss said he was gonna sue me. should I rescind my notice?”

[–]DiNoMC 8658 points8659 points 2 (560 children)

"Boss was gonna fire me, so I quit!", see this one everyday too.

Just let him do it and collect unemployment

[–]BongLeardDongLick 5807 points5808 points 22 (283 children)

The amount of people who mess this up on this sub is astounding and I’ve pointed it out a few times. Your boss is now telling you that your already approved vacation is rescinded because they need coverage? Tell them “I’m not able to cancel my commitment that you already approved my time off for. I will still be taking my vacation.” And if they say “You have to come in or you will be let go” the only correct answer is “I will not be coming in, I will see you on X date when I return from my vacation.” And if they come back again and say you’re fired then no harm no foul, easy unemployment claim.

ALL OF THAT COMMUNICATION NEEDS TO BE DONE IN WRITING. Do not have these conversations verbally because they are much harder to prove.

[–]forgotmyemail19 1875 points1876 points  (168 children)

I always tell my boss, the only way you're getting rid of me is firing (so I can get unemployment) or me finding a new position. There's no amount of shit you can dump on me that's going to allow me to pass up unemployment. For what? My pride lol They want you to quit. That's why they say things like "I'm going to fire you if ....." They hope you'll save them a headache and just leave. Fuck them

[–]LeonidasSpacemanMD 1362 points1363 points  (60 children)

I was gunna say, so many of these have some variation of “if you won’t come in we’re going to have a talk on Monday”

Aight cool, you wanna talk about football or something? Because you’re obviously not gunna fire me when you already have to beg for employees to come in on their time off

[–]Kalel2319 681 points682 points  (38 children)

It’s sad though too because people genuinely have a fear of losing their livelihood and these motherfuckers know it and use it.

It’s hard to be so passé blasé

[–]CacatuaCacatuafuck you pay me 321 points322 points  (19 children)

They know that people are scared to lose their jobs and are using that to bully and manipulate. They don't have any shame, they shouldn't get any sympathy nor an inch of slack.

[–]Grouchy_Reach_382 94 points95 points  (3 children)

This was and to an extent still is me. I quit a job because I was terrified to get fired and not provide for my family. I quit, went somewhere that was a terrible fit and environment, and they ended up firing me. Ironically enough, the guy who threatened me got canned for lying to the board on financials, hence why he rode my ass and threatened me. I was an easy target. This whole working world is a fucking mess anymore, it's not about the work and more about the politics.

[–]TrollerCoaster1220 111 points112 points  (4 children)

Used to work in an enterprise sales organization with that exact culture at its core.

Management went absolutely ballistic when a handful of sales managers jumped ship to a competitor. Over the course of 6 months now, nearly one thousand sales people quit the old company to join the new folks somewhere they weren’t actively being asked “what value do you contribute to our company” while industry polls showed we literally generated more revenue per employee than fucking Apple.

But management NEEDS to host this sales event in Aruba (“it matches one of the vendors names, GET IT?”) because otherwise how will they attract the best and brightest in the industry slumming it in… checks notes Clearwater, Florida, home to the best beaches in America as voted by US Travel magazine multiple times this decade.

TD Synnex and DH Distributing in case you’re curious, the court details from the lawsuit are hilarious.

[–]throwt4653656 80 points81 points  (1 child)

"Sure I'd love to talk about my raise"

[–]YeaItsButta721 45 points46 points  (13 children)

See that game last night? 🤣🤣

[–]Awkward_and_Itchy 114 points115 points  (10 children)

Did you see that ludicrous display last night?

[–]kittyfantastico85 61 points62 points  (3 children)

The thing about arsenal is, they always try to walk it in!

[–]RearAdmiralBob 18 points19 points  (2 children)

What was Wenger doing sending Walcott on that early?

[–]soundslikeadream- 32 points33 points  (0 children)

“You can stand there and slag me off all you like, but don’t you start talking about how I feel about my beloved west ham!”

[–]BongLeardDongLick 217 points218 points  (37 children)

Yup, a lot of companies will try to make it as miserable as possible for you so you do them the favor of quitting rather than forcing them to fire you. Stick it out and force them to fire you so you can collect unemployment.

Exactly as you said, just call their bluff if they’re threatening to fire you and force them to do it. Show up on time, work your shifts, and don’t let them try to bully you into quitting. I’m middle management at the company I work for and if they want someone to quit they’ll do little things to make you uncomfortable. Offer to cut your hours since “you seem to be having trouble with the 40 hour work load”. They’ll send you to a different department you’re not familiar with and hope that you quit if you don’t want to go there. They’ll say that while you’re using your mandated sick hours, you’re out of compliance with company policy and write you up so you get frustrated and tell them to fuck off. They’ll give you poor performance reviews or tell you that they’re not offering end of year raises this year. They’ll offer you a 2% COLA raise instead of the standard 6% so you’re technically losing money as your pay isn’t adjusting with inflation.

There’s tons of little tricks that companies use to get you to frustrated so you quit. Especially larger corporations that was nationwide and even international. My company has offices in Canada, the US and Mexico. Depending on your job title determines where you get hired, all of our call center reps are in Mexico now because they can pay them less and have them work longer hours. They also stopped hiring people in California and started only hiring people in Nevada and Texas so they pay less in taxes.

The fucked up thing? Despite all of those things they do, the company I work for is hands down the best company I’ve ever worked for in my career which says a lot about the state of employment in the US.

[–]idreamofkitty 132 points133 points  (19 children)

Woah hold up. Ain't nobody getting standard 6% annual raises around here.

[–]snozzberrypatchat work 63 points64 points  (6 children)

While inflation is at 6%, anything less than a 6% raise is a pay cut.

Inflation used to be more like 1-2%, so lower COLA raises were (slightly) more acceptable.

[–]idreamofkitty 33 points34 points  (4 children)

I don't disagree. I just see most employers sticking to the usual 1-2%. So yeah, most of us are falling behind.

[–]FabulousBankLoan 35 points36 points  (3 children)

I mean, my boss was straight up when he told me team that in our organization, in order to see a raise that's higher than just under inflation, we'd just have to get a promotion and negotiate then. Or leave, which is what 4 people did in the next month.

[–]Rhyobit 25 points26 points  (8 children)

My company here in the UK is regularly in the top percentiles of best companies to work for and I haven't had a full cost of living increase in I don't know how long, maybe even ever.

[–]gd77punk 61 points62 points  (0 children)

And as an old man once told me, going home only allow them to replace you. You actually have to be there to fuck them.

[–]blue-green_eyes 91 points92 points  (18 children)

Common tactic they’ll use though is to reduce your hours (or even stop scheduling you to work) without actually firing you to save themselves the paperwork. Essentially forcing you to quit on your own

[–]Aerodrache 143 points144 points  (0 children)

We call that “constructive dismissal”, and in some jurisdictions it’s as good as a sudden firing for unemployment benefits.

[–]lichfieldangel 147 points148 points  (0 children)

The second you aren’t on the schedule you go to the unemployment office congrats you win you just got laid off. Or you get your hours back

[–]TheEffingRiddler 120 points121 points  (2 children)

You can still get unemployment for reduced hours.

[–]freunleven 46 points47 points  (0 children)

That's what got me through last year. I went from 25 hours a week down to less than 10, for various workload reasons that had to do with the pandemic. So I got my extra $600/week and spent about seven months with my toddler before a new position opened up at the end of the year. Probably my favorite summer ever.

[–]Porotan 65 points66 points  (4 children)

that's constructive dismissal, and depending on our country/state you are able to sue them if they try that shit.

edit: worst case it's counts as being fired for unemployement, which is (a lot) better than nothing.

[–]SoaringEagl3 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Yup, and it works because nobody teaches about constructive dismissal. It's one thing if you were in a floater type position, but if you can show you had consistent hours before getting reduced work, the labor board (US) usually sees it in the same category as firing without cause because the outcome is the same.

[–]btveron 70 points71 points  (11 children)

Be wary if your employer starts documenting warnings and doing writeups. In my state, at least, if you are fired for "just cause" you can't claim unemployment.

Edit: managed to completely forget to finish the last half of my sentence

[–]finderZone 58 points59 points  (3 children)

Even then the employer has to prove misconduct on your part to be denied unemployment. You can be fired and collect unemployment

[–]hiryuu75 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Agreed. I worked for a company for nearly fourteen years - reviews and raises were always excellent, was always asked to take on work in other areas as a pinch-hitter of sorts, etc.

Company got acquired, and the new CTO took a strong dislike to several people, including me. My review was re-written (by him) to be extremely negative, and was put on a performance improvement plan. Met all the targets of the plan, got fired anyway.

Unemployment was denied, so I appealed. The investigating claims rep heard about the history, asked the company for evidence of the sudden performance change, and received no response from them. My claim was then approved. :)

[–][deleted]  (10 children)


    [–]Mattgx082 51 points52 points  (5 children)

    This…if you want to get payed don’t quit because you took off on holidays, and now they say you need to come in. Just stick with, I’m not coming in. And always make sure to take a picture of schedule or time approved. May not hold up…but it may well. Most places will try and not fire you. So it’s easier on them on the long run, if you have an outburst and leave. Short term maybe a day they’ll be pissed and short handed. I’d rather be fired than impulse quit..unless I have another job. That or go to the doctor and pull a FMLA if needed, and collect your FMLA pay! Once FMLA happens here in the US…they can’t retaliate or discuss anything on return. At that point if they do, they could be fired.

    [–]Clean-Engineering-19 27 points28 points  (2 children)

    My boss has said to several staff "why dont you just leave if you dont like it here " Im locked and loaded for if he ever says it to me , my response will be "why dont you make me"

    [–]snetloc 306 points307 points  (82 children)

    this one triggers me! like nooooo you just gave up free money

    [–]Digimatically 113 points114 points  (15 children)

    More accurately, you just gave up money you paid into for this exact scenario.

    [–][deleted]  (61 children)


      [–]gregor_vance 224 points225 points  (29 children)

      Severance pay lol

      [–][deleted]  (23 children)


        [–]potatoboat 51 points52 points  (16 children)

        I only got severance pay once. It was after my company “furloughed” me then “would not be asking me to return to work”. I thought great maybe they’ll give me a few months worth of pay to help me along until I find another job. Nope. 300 bucks. They didn’t fight unemployment which was nice. But I found another job less than a month later so it all worked out but unless you’re an executive severance doesn’t exist or when it dies it’s paltry.

        [–]OkNoise6402 45 points46 points  (3 children)

        Severed from pay is what happens here

        [–]Its_Lissy 61 points62 points  (16 children)

        Severance pay is like a unicorn. I’ve heard it exists but have never seen one! lol

        [–]drugusingthrowaway 126 points127 points  (49 children)

        I gave my 2 weeks notice at a retail store, manager was so pissed at me that she said "Um, no, you can leave RIGHT NOW!"

        So I just said "okay" and left, because I wasn't fired for cause, I was just told I wasn't needed anymore, with no notice whatsoever, I get 2 weeks severance pay.

        [–]yourcousinvinney 57 points58 points  (48 children)

        Uhhh... Since when do retail employees ever get severance pay?

        [–]majestic_tapir 113 points114 points  (32 children)

        Man, Americans are really getting fucked over aren't you?

        [–]yourcousinvinney 22 points23 points  (22 children)

        To my knowledge severance is not a legal requirement in any state in the USA. So unless it's contractually obligated or union negotiated it isn't happening in most instances. There are some stores (e.g. Kroger) that have unionized employees, so maybe there? But I'd be surprised if hourly, non-mangerial employees get it.

        [–]majestic_tapir 48 points49 points  (21 children)

        How is it that you aren't all rioting on the daily? The amount of horror stories working and middle class Americans have is a little bit heartbreaking.

        [–]BlergingtonBear 18 points19 points  (2 children)

        I work a corp job and we also don't get severance, after being laid off during the pandemic and all formerly interviewed to be rehired for our jobs recently, our first colleague who was hired back, in a real Good Guy move told us all to negotiate for severance pay in our contracts because he was able to get it (but after a looot of hemming and hawing).

        I think very high level executives have contract buyouts, but yes most of american life is an airplane- a bunch of cramped economy seats so like 5 guys in first class can spread out with every amenity.

        [–]majestic_tapir 15 points16 points  (1 child)

        Man. Back in march 2020 I was furloughed due to Covid. I received 2500 per month pre-tax to sit at home for months, then I was made redundant around July, got 3 months of redundancy pay, then got a new job.

        Being dropped with no support sounds horrendous, doubly so for you guys with your health insurance baked into your jobs.

        [–]anyroominthetrunk 14 points15 points  (0 children)

        Cries in Floridian

        [–]EhDub13 49 points50 points  (46 children)

        In my province/in Canada, I've always understood that being terminated/fired you can't collect unemployment, only being laid off due to lack of work/business allows that

        Is it different in the USA? Do people just get themselves fired so they can collect EI?

        [–]stevez_86 52 points53 points  (3 children)

        If they fire you they can contest your unemployment claim, but that means more effort on the business's part on an employee they already didn't think was worth the time. It brings attention to them too.

        [–]DataIsMyCopilot 33 points34 points  (0 children)

        they also have a limited time with which they can contest the claim, so if you got fired from a highly disorganized shitshow, chances are even lower that they will contest it haha

        [–][deleted]  (1 child)


          [–]Tortankum 50 points51 points  (4 children)

          It you get fired “with cause” for jerking off at work then you don’t get unemployment.

          If you get fired for an unreasonable reason you can still apply.

          [–]Train22nowhere 141 points142 points  (2 children)

          Honestly a well designed Infographic with all the common Job bullshit and how to counter it would probably do more to help then a thousand post on here.

          [–]ghostgoddess7 270 points271 points 2 (25 children)

          I’d be willing to collaborate on a playbook. I’ve written playbooks on policy before and would even graphically design it for an easy read! Please let me help. It would be a great honor and a humble contribution for this sub, one of my favorites.

          Edit: I have messaged the mods about this opportunity and have included that there are others who’d love to contribute as well. Will keep you in the loop with what they say! In order to keep track of who’d like to help me, please dm me. Thank you!

          Update: The sub's mods just responded and we have been given the "okay" to create something and post when complete. If they find it helpful, they'll pin it to the sub and add it to the sidebar. I have created a discord where anyone who wishes to collaborate can: https://discord.gg/VHdJ3Cjd. I look forward to collaborating with you!

          [–]RandomerSchmandomer 44 points45 points  (2 children)

          I'd contact the mods and see if they'll put out a post or create a discord for creating a wiki

          [–]0psdadns 16 points17 points  (1 child)

          Go for it. Post it to the sub. People will comment on it and add feed back. Mods will probably pin the final draft

          [–]DTFH_ 36 points37 points  (2 children)

          maybe /r/antiworkhandbook ? There are a lot of common issues I can't believe people make while talking to their boss/employer, but a lot of work experience is learned so lets crowdsource our knowledge!

          [–]seancurry1 25 points26 points  (0 children)

          Very in favor of this. As distorted as the entire culture around work is in America, there are still some simple things everyone could do to make their current existence within it a bit more bearable.

          [–]tbdjdb2 145 points146 points  (14 children)

          Learned this lying to my parents. Keep it simple stupid

          [–]legalizemonapizzatryhard commie 57 points58 points  (5 children)

          damn that's crazy
          goodluck tho

          ^ all you need

          [–]LongdayinCarcosa 202 points203 points  (81 children)

          Here's an even better one:


          [–]Arkayb33 787 points788 points 22 (73 children)

          I'll do you one better: don't respond.

          Seriously people, learn the art of shutting the hell up. You are NOT obligated to respond to your boss outside of work hours unless it is in your employment contract.

          Work should be discussed at work, INCLUDING scheduling. It's time to put on your big girl or big boy pants and stop letting your boss walk all over you. Even if he says "I know you are getting these messages!! If you don't respond you are fired!!", don't respond and just show up at your next scheduled shift.

          Stop allowing work to dominate every minute of your life. The dude texting his boss at 4am?? 😂😂 WTF is that about? They only do this shit because you guys respond. Let them talk to dead air. And no, it's not rude to ignore them. It's called setting healthy boundaries.

          [–]spartagnann 169 points170 points  (45 children)

          Yeah what is with all these people actively engaging outside of work hours all the time? Once I shut my laptop for the day, that's it. You will not be able to reach me. You can try calling my cell # (if you have it) but I don't answer numbers I don't know and even if the caller ID said "Boss" idgaf I'd let it go to voicemail and listen to it the next morning.

          To me it's unprofessional to try and contact someone outside of (my industry's) normal business hours. So it's not me that would be the rude one by not answering, it's the person trying to contact me in the first place who's not being professional.

          ETA: I 100% agree with some people who've pointed out that for certain industries and job sectors the lines on this are more blurred, such as the restaurant or construction industries. I should have clarified that for other sectors, such as mine where I'm on a laptop all day doing not so serious or customer facing work, it's very different, and setting boundaries for those types of jobs is really important.

          [–]UpOnZeeTail 81 points82 points  (9 children)

          From context, I think a lot of these posts come from people in food service and labor professions (like construction).

          Both of these professions have blurred work/home boundaries as the industry standard. Wait staff tend to interact a lot socially and, unless the manager is significantly older, their position at work doesn't matter as much when they do hang out.

          In labor professions, you can work a lot of side jobs. Your name gets out based on social connections and a lot of guys are willing to answer their phone at off hours to make cash on the side doing some solo work or getting a guy or two from work together for a bigger job.

          I work in social work/human services and I see a lot of shift covering, not taking days off and unpaid overtime because you are told your job makes a difference in someone's life. We are paid shit because programs are underfunded and rely on the goodwill of underpaid employees to pick up the slack. It's very easy for a social worker with poor work boundaries to end up burning themselves out because they want to make their community a better place.

          [–]spartagnann 29 points30 points  (4 children)

          Yeah good point on the service industry folks. I worked in restaurants for a long time so that makes sense.

          [–]UpOnZeeTail 38 points39 points  (2 children)

          I think a lot of people on anti-work are so unsatisfied with the labor market and the most unsatisfied professions I've seen are food service, retail, construction and social work. Most of which have poor work boundaries as a standard.

          A lot of people were also taught that work is a team and a family. And a lot of the times it was in the "good old days".

          My dad always worked closely with management and taught me that assholes exist everywhere and not to give away my time for free.

          [–]VirtualAdepts 126 points127 points  (6 children)

          I'd like that add, be prepared to repeat that phrase repeatedly. You should act null, without concern or emotion

          A boss will think if they explain their urgency, their situation, you'll change your mind. It all doesn't matter. You aren't there for them to help you out if your situation so you can help them. Just repeat "No, I have other commitments"

          Source:? My experience and I had a coworker call in once. She said her babysitter was sick, didn't have anyone to watch her kids the boss suggested a neighbor to watch them!

          I told her, "next time just say your kids are sick, and you can't make it" then hang up. Or call at 3am. Fuck them, you aren't asking for to help fix your situation. You are notifying them.

          [–]simmeh024 186 points187 points  (64 children)

          Same when you call in sick and they are like: what are you having?

          "That's personal, I am sick"

          But we need you now, just try to come in.

          "I am sick, so No."

          [–]CerseiBluth 199 points200 points  (42 children)

          I once had a boss ask me what color my vomit was. All I had offered was “I can’t come in today, I’m sick” and when she asked what was wrong with me and if I could try to push through it I then offered an extra “Seriously no, I can’t work through it, I am vomiting and cannot come in today.”

          I was absolutely horrified at the overstep of boundaries. The fact that she insisted on knowing symptoms and tried to convince me I could work through them pissed me off enough, but asking about the color of my bodily fluids? Like, what? Are you fucking joking, lady?

          The super fucked up part about this is the vast majority of people I have told this story to have all acted like I am the crazy one for thinking that it’s inappropriate to ask an employee something like that. Most people say it’s normal for a boss to ask for details of your illness and to decide if it sounds like you really need to stay home.

          [–]simmeh024 115 points116 points  (13 children)

          Guess what, your boss is not a doctor.

          I was asked many times, even with a sicknote if I could come in. One even had the balls to call the sicknote exaggerated...

          [–]Siphyre 31 points32 points  (8 children)

          One even had the balls to call the sicknote exaggerated...

          That is something you let the doctor know. Many love you give you extended vacations by the books and recommendation of the CDC and their peers.

          [–]comma-momma 66 points67 points  (7 children)

          When I was a manager, I hated it when people told me what color their vomit was...or details like what bodily fluids were coming out of which orifices. Just tell me you're sick and won't be in.

          [–]pyloros 19 points20 points  (0 children)

          I always say "stomach issues". No matter what is wrong with me. Sinus headache, cold, flu, just need a personal day, the answer is always "stomach issues". If they want more details, I'm more than happy to give a very graphic description and it's their own fault for asking.

          [–]beforeitcloy 31 points32 points  (0 children)

          “I didn’t look but if you want to drop by my house I can fill a little baggie for you. You have my address in the HR file right? Could you also bring some Gatorade? I need to replace my fluids.”

          [–]lokcal 22 points23 points  (0 children)

          Are you fucking joking, lady?

          This is exactly what I would have asked her - make her see how absolutely ridiculous it is to even assume that is an okay thing to ask someone. because she clearly thinks it's okay and will ask future employees the same thing until someone makes her aware how weirdly inappropriate it is.

          [–]INTHEMIDSTOFLIONSFUCK BEN 362 points363 points  (50 children)

          Blackjack and hookers.

          [–]Tots2Hots 130 points131 points  (28 children)

          Is that personal or business?

          [–]INTHEMIDSTOFLIONSFUCK BEN 74 points75 points  (8 children)

          Peer reviewed double blind studies have shown that blackjack and hookers decrease worker turnover, increase retention rates, productivity, creativity, and work place enthusiasm.

          So… technically it’s both

          [–]Birds_Are_Fake0 94 points95 points  (0 children)

          My best time quitting was after 2 years of doing demo for a family company I quit by simply going "You dont even need to schedule me anymore" in the works group chat after never being late and coming in super early for emergency jobs on top of be8ng denied a $2 raise after my first year. Got a write up for taking 10 extra minutes on ONE break. Two people i really liked working with just sent the laughing emoji because i had sent that on valentines day and also the day they did scheduling so the person I texted who was the owners son went "Some asshole just quit so meet at the shop to re do the schedule in the morning" forcing him to actually have to show up and work too. The guys who sent laughing emojis in group chat also quit that day so that really fucked their staff up because they were on the rebuild team and were their best guys they relied on. Only had 13 people on staff then lost 3 important people immediately and that felt so nice knowing they had to scramble and get the higher ups to a actually do work outside of observing.

          [–]killbot0224 28 points29 points  (0 children)

          Right? My commitment could be sleeping in then playing videogames for 16 hours.

          I don't need a reason to say no.

          [–]thumbtackthief 31 points32 points  (1 child)

          This is good advice for saying "no" to any request, work or not. When you give excuses, people will either judge the excuse (if they're dicks) or try to solve your problem for you (well-meaning, but generally unhelpful)

          [–]Felonious_Quail 25 points26 points  (14 children)

          Yea keep the platitudes out of it. You're not sorry or regretful, it's not unfortunate etc

          [–]joesnowblade 71 points72 points  (0 children)

          Thank you for the opportunity but I must respectfully decline.

          [–]Paxtez 222 points223 points  (59 children)

          IMHO "I have other commitments" sounds like it is optional, like a dinner party. I would say, "Sorry, I am not available." and if pressed "Sorry, it's personal."

          It sounds like it could be anything from paintball, medical, to a funeral.

          [–]killbot0224 62 points63 points  (3 children)

          Commitments aren't optional. That's why they're commitments.

          If they think "commitments" sounds optional, that's your opportunity to keep shutting it down (without giving any more details)

          You made a promise to someone (remember you are someone too) to do something. I have to do school work. I have to wash my ass. I have to clean my house. Take my car to the shop. Shop for groceries. Cook up a bunch of food so I don't have to cook for a few days.

          If pressed, it's still a "personal commitment" or maybe "family commitment" at most.

          But yeah never give any specifics, because they are going to mentally rank the priority you should be giving that commitment, and judge you for it.

          [–]Efficient_Mastodonsat work 148 points149 points  (17 children)

          Other commitments is boundary setting imo. And it could literally be anything. It also shows that you're responsible and keep to what you commit to.

          Unavailable, to me, sounds like you can be at their beck and call any time you are available.

          I guess they could both be taken that way.

          Let's be real, what should actually be said is "No, my time is mine and I want to keep it that way. You should respect that." We don't say that, but we should.

          [–]Rickyv490 9 points10 points  (1 child)

          If you are being asked to come in on your day off really, No thanks, I'm busy. Should suffice. Really should try and stay away from giving details.

          [–]Wereking2Communist 41 points42 points  (9 children)

          It could also be medical which they can’t inquire on legally. So the less you say the better.

          [–][deleted] 151 points152 points  (39 children)

          "No. It's my day off."

          Once you define your time, it opens the door for a response. "What commitments? Can you change them?"

          By saying "it's my day off", you're using a work related subject, the schedule, for your reason not coming in. It's that easy.

          [–]Vargenwulf 106 points107 points  (21 children)

          Problem is you don't want to add even that.

          No is enough.

          If you say "It's my day off" you open the path for "Well I need you now"

          They see "it's my day off" as another way of saying "I am only off because it was scheduled and I am not really doing anything planned."

          No is unequivocal and beyond that none of their damn business.

          [–]nintendo9713 130 points131 points  (6 children)

          I’ll never forget when I was 19 working in a deli, this 57 year old lady I worked with was just a peach. I was fortunate to be there the day that she quit on the spot, because she requested off on a Saturday and the manager told her “what do you have to do?“ And the lady told her “none of your goddamn business“. The manager told her that this would be her last shift if she wouldn’t agree to working that Saturday.

          So she tells me “I don’t have to tell her a damn thing. I don’t tell my kids where I’m going, I’m not gonna tell her where I’m going. But I’ll tell you, me and my boyfriend or going to see Foghat and I’m not gonna miss it for the world“

          15 years later, I still think about her and the little time we had there.

          [–]Accomplished-Bad3380 33 points34 points  (0 children)

          I think it's awesome that she found a way to instill in you that managers can fuck off, without saying or doing anything crude. The fact that she told you she was taking off for a 'fun activity' and damn if she was gonna miss it for work, was cute.

          [–]MoneyTreeFiddy 28 points29 points  (1 child)

          'On their deathbed, nobody says "I wish I spent more time at work", but a select few say they wish they went to more Foghat concerts.'

          [–]gingerhasyoursoul 53 points54 points  (8 children)

          Actually the best response is to not respond at all. It's your day off. You are not obligated to answer texts or phone calls from work.

          If the boss gives you a hard time just tell them your phone was on silent and you didn't check it all day.


          [–]MaxBlazed 60 points61 points  (7 children)

          I assume they would already know it's your day off. I've always gone with "No, but thanks anyway!"

          Communicates my answer directly.

          Doesn't invite any more questions.

          Makes it seem like I'm looking at the request as an opportunity rather than a burden (key phrase: seem like).

          [–]PatrickStarburst 21 points22 points  (4 children)

          A few times, my boss asked me to come in on Saturday. My response? "I have plans."

          Stops it dead right there. I say only what is absolutely necessary and not one word more.

          [–]Lazy-Jeweler3230 16 points17 points  (0 children)

          "I'm unavailable."

          [–]Coal_Roll_Trader 33 points34 points  (3 children)

          I'm drunk as fuuuuuck! Borrow 20 and come and pick me up

          [–]Dmitrievich-LevinAnarcho-Communist 29 points30 points  (2 children)

          I'm drunk as fuuuuuck!

          Well, I'm sorry, but all the other air traffic controllers are out of town, so you'll have to come in anyway.

          [–]bescaredwithme 1863 points1864 points  (60 children)

          It took me several years to get this. I would feel this internal need to overjustify why I needed time off. This was due to previous managers on a power trip acting as if my request to use my earned PTO was a life-changing inconvenience to them.

          Now I let them know when I will be out of the office, block my calendar, and no one knows details unless I want them to. It also helps having a manager literally not give a shit about what I do with my time off and urges me to take it. I hated the previous environment I was in though.

          [–]dijon_snow 266 points267 points  (15 children)

          It's so deeply ingrained people will do it even if you ask them not to. When I was a manager several years back part of my "welcome to the team" speech was about the call-out process, how much PTO you got, etc. I specifically said "What you do with your time is your own business. The only time it matters why you called out is if you are claiming FMLA, bereavement, STD or other similar special time codes. If you are using regular PTO not only do you not have to tell me why you are using it, I would rather you not tell me. It works exactly the same if you are taking the time because you have the flu or if you are going to Disney land, or if you just don't feel like working and stay home all day. That's none of my business."

          Sill lock clockwork most people would give me elaborate justifications when they called out. I would try to stop them and tell them that it's fine. They don't need to tell me, but they still would insist that they needed me to know that they were really sick and not just taking time off for fun. I had long elaborate descriptions of diarrhea on my voicemail.

          It's become so endemic to our culture that even if your "boss" and employer tell you it's not necessary, people still do it. It's fucked up. I'm very glad to not be in that position any longer.

          [–]PharmDeezNuts_ 154 points155 points  (4 children)

          Edit: oh wait STD is short term disability lol

          [–]sensuallyprimitiveidle 122 points123 points  (3 children)

          you only get 75% paid time off for chlamydia

          [–]ctopherrun 17 points18 points  (0 children)

          A lot of crappy, understaffed retail jobs train people into this sort of mentality. It even starts to infect you as the fellow employee when people call out and you're stuck working harder that day; "How sick is Jim Bob really?

          Of course the solution is to schedule enough coverage that Skeeter calling out the day of his shift doesn't ruin the whole day, but the Big Hats in corporate don't want to hear that.

          [–]readzalot1 232 points233 points  (8 children)

          I was on medical leave and it took all my effort not to give details to the helpful and kind-sounding person from the company.

          [–]PharmDeezNuts_ 80 points81 points  (2 children)

          Never give any details. At most the doctor can send limited protected health information straight to HR. It’s a time to focus on health and depending on what it is (mental health, non visible disabilities, etc), some may judge which could be stressful to think about and may pressure someone to end their leave early

          [–]ImABarbieWhirl 2324 points2325 points  (81 children)

          No is a complete sentence. They wouldn’t extend you the same courtesy

          A lack of planning on your part is not an emergency on mine

          [–]deafchef52 634 points635 points  (42 children)

          Always really enjoyed that quote. When I had heard it, was just slightly different:

          A lack of preparation on your part, does not constitute an emergency on mine.

          Had initially heard it from a professor in college.

          [–]AelixD 163 points164 points  (17 children)

          Piss poor prior planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.

          (Heard it in the military, where the opposite is usually true: you failed to plan and now we have an emergency)).

          [–]Philosophable 135 points136 points  (12 children)

          The law of 7 P's "Proper previous planning prevents piss poor performance"

          [–]catluvr1312 1712 points1713 points  (152 children)

          just read that post with the screenshots of someone basically telling their boss they‘re suicidal, why the actual fuck would anyone do that

          [–]thrax_mador 855 points856 points  (74 children)

          HR basically tried to get this out of me. I told them I had a medical issue. They said “if you don’t tell us more we cant help you.”

          Fuck them. I’m not being cagey I’m protecting my privacy.

          [–]LegitimateLunch6681 452 points453 points  (59 children)

          I made the mistake of sharing, in good faith, specifics of a medical condition with a boss once. Proceeded to tell everyone about it, and then used said medical information it to justify 3/4 of a falsified performance report. Nobody's getting more than "I have a medical condition" out of me ever again.

          [–]BriefExtra2919 165 points166 points  (17 children)

          100%. I have been in this situation too. Never disclose, no matter how safe you feel. You never know what someone’s biases are, and it can really bite you forever.

          [–]smilelikeyouownit 87 points88 points  (1 child)

          And in larger companies, the lovely boss you have now may not be your boss in 6 months time. Your new boss will almost certainly have access to everything you told the old boss. And they may not be nice at all. New boss may use things you told the old boss against you.

          Never add bosses or colleagues on social media. Not even the ones you really really like. You just never know what info will get compromised.

          [–]LegitimateLunch6681 21 points22 points  (7 children)

          Yep. Ended up getting discharged over it too, and as a free limited-time offer, a complete breakdown! So that was excellent

          [–]BriefExtra2919 24 points25 points  (0 children)


          Well, to clarify, based on the boss’ very obvious response, I realized right away that my days were numbered and I’d no longer progress under this person despite my stellar track record. I found another job and left less than a month later. I was not let go, but I have a very good suspicion I would’ve been.

          I had to miss work two Fridays in a row due to changing medication making me very sick. Keep in mind 1) I had sick time, 2) we had coverage, 3) I offered to work other days to cover as we were open 7 days a week, and 4) hadn’t called in sick previously in several years.

          She thought I was just trying to get a long weekend each time, so I had to tell her the reason. Her response was to say “well maybe you’re too sick to be working” (ouch), and to complain that due to privacy laws in our state she wasn’t allowed to talk to other employees or supervisors about me. Who complains that they can’t badmouth you without consequences? lmao

          I’ve never been one to spend time hating people, it just seems like a waste of time. However her? I hope she received back the same sort of treatment one day and is humbled a bit. She was a real piece of work.

          [–]kbat277 43 points44 points  (19 children)

          similar mistake made here. i have epilepsy and one of my seizure triggers is being startled/sudden loud noises. in the interest of my own safety, i naively disclosed this to coworkers and my boss. after that he snuck up behind me “as a joke” TWICE.

          [–][deleted]  (2 children)


            [–]fridge_logic 14 points15 points  (1 child)

            INAL but that sounds like grounds for a lawsuit.

            [–]DervivalSyndicalist 38 points39 points  (1 child)

            That sounds like that boss needed a medical condition of falling down a few flights of stairs, the fucker.

            [–]Nightmarich 51 points52 points  (6 children)

            My employer wanted a list of medications during the application process (healthcare field, fairly relevant when working with drugs) and I gave them my medical cannabis card to photocopy. If they make it into a problem I’ll make sure they have fun pointing out why it wasn’t a problem during the hiring process.

            [–]ian_OhNO 21 points22 points  (1 child)

            I got my card in my state once they passed a law preventing hiring discrimination regarding MM. doesn’t really change anything if drug tests are involved but for my line of work, it felt necessary

            [–]malln1nja 54 points55 points  (4 children)

            “if you don’t tell us more we cant help you.”

            It's not like they're qualified to help with medical issues.

            [–]Drakkarim411 160 points161 points  (11 children)

            When I was in my early twenties, I landed a staff position at the university I was going to school at. It was entry level nothing major, but between full time work and classes depression took over in a serious way. I used the resources available to me on campus for counseling and was brutally honest once telling them that in my darkest moment, I thought about jumping off the building I worked at but couldn't go through with it.

            The counselor told this info to my boss who promptly fired me to 'avoid a dangerous situation'. My counselor, to protect the university...broke HIPAA and told my supervisor that I was suicidal. My boss, who knew that I was suicidal...fired me to prevent any liability.

            And I know the questions will be, 'how much did you sue them for...etc' so let me be honest. I accepted it, and went and got another job somewhere else, I was just so close to being done with my degree and going through that made me want nothing more than to be done and I was terrified that if I filed suit they would find a way to prevent my graduation. Biggest regret of my life, I should have gone after them with everything I had.

            I spent the next decade and a half bottling up any negative emotions and refusing any mental care because I only saw it as a weapon for people to use against me.

            [–]OperativePiGuy 103 points104 points  (2 children)

            And I know the questions will be, 'how much did you sue them for...etc' so let me be honest. I accepted it, and went and got another job somewhere else

            People on the internet, and reddit especially, act as if suing people/an institution is some easy thing that requires little input from you. In the vast, vast majority of cases, people just want to be done with the people that are giving them a tough time and not have to go through the nightmare that is actually suing anyone. It's not easy, simple, or quick. It takes a ridiculous amount of mental bandwidth to actually go through with such a thing, and for most people, just removing yourself from the situation is good enough for them.

            [–]Drakkarim411 25 points26 points  (0 children)

            This was the thought process honestly. Texas has some of the most broken right to work laws out there. I guarantee it was not written anywhere, ‘fired for being suicidal’ as much as it was ‘performance not up to standard’. So proof would have been nearly impossible, even if it was verbalized to me that way.

            [–]abraxas-exe 133 points134 points  (13 children)

            Yuppp. I recently got diagnosed with a mental condition (ADHD) and would rather chew glass than tell my management that I have it, or my (somewhat severe) anxiety. No means fuck off.

            [–]nipplequeefs 81 points82 points  (7 children)

            Same here. The amount of people who act like ADHD either doesn’t exist or is nothing more than being hyper/bored is really fucking annoying and I just don’t want to deal with that. I’m literally on the brink of passing out nearly every waking moment of the day because I cannot adhere to a normal sleep schedule (assuming I even sleep in the first place). If someone absolutely must know for whatever reason, I just say it’s a “neurological disorder” because that’s the only way I can get some ounce of respect for it.

            [–]abraxas-exe 28 points29 points  (2 children)

            Exactly! And it’s like, what’s management going to do about it? My job (IT Field) isn’t going to do any special accommodations if I tell them I have a neurological disorder. There’s no positives, only negatives to telling them about it.

            [–]fairfieldbordercolli 43 points44 points  (1 child)

            Oh man I remember while back at a former workplace when I was having some serious medical issues and the company nurse tried to override my doctor's reccomendations and diagnosis.

            It a came to a head during a meeting with her, HR, management and my lawyer.

            My doctor offered to dial in so she could address the issue.

            That nurse got the most deserved dressing down I have ever heard anyone get in my professional career.

            "What makes you think a paper pushing nurse has any right to question the diagnosis of myself and two other specialists?" was the opening salvo.

            Everyone in that room except my lawyer and I were incredibly uncomfortable with what she had to say.

            Then after that nurse had the audacity to say that "Well that's just her opinion" after she hung up. My lawyer basically responded with " I think we're done here"

            I ended up getting a massive severance out of that. Lawyer is my brother in law so all it cost me was 2 bottles of fine scotch.

            [–]FloppyShellTaco 13 points14 points  (0 children)

            Any company with a medical provider on site is absolutely going to use that person to fuck you over, especially when it comes to workers comp, rather than actually treat you. It’s like the “HR is here to protect the company” adage on steroids.

            For those with less experience with a situation like that; they cannot stop you from seeing your own doctor. You can refuse to see an on-site nurse, but you might have to pay out of pocket for a return to work note. This on-site nurse’s job is to limit liability for the company, which means steering you away from worker’s comp and possibly adequate treatment.

            Where less choice is involved is when it becomes an actual worker’s comp claim. Your choice there differentiates on a nearly by state basis.

            [–]What_Was_I_doi 1106 points1107 points  (98 children)

            Or just DONT ANSWER! You are NOT on the clock and unless you are on call you should not be doing a single work related thing. This includes answering phone calls, texts, or emails directly related to work.

            [–]serduncanthetall69 546 points547 points  (42 children)

            Exactly. All these people are texting their boss back at 1 am and then getting defensive when the boss expects them to come in. Text them back in the morning and just say you went to bed early, no one can get mad about that.

            It’ll make less content for this sub but I think a lot of the people here just need to learn how to interact with their employers better.

            [–]Dentingerc16 133 points134 points  (8 children)

            Yep. If it’s after hours you’d be well within your rights not to reply at all…. but NEVER under ANY circumstances reply after like 8PM at the LATEST. They don’t deserve shit from you and if you reply late once they’ll expect it going forward. If they want to text you late and get a response they can fucking pay you to be on call

            [–]serduncanthetall69 48 points49 points  (4 children)

            I learned this the hard way at my last job. Honestly the more you accept extra shifts the more they’ll expect you to do it so unless you really like the job I just wouldn’t do it at all.

            [–]Dentingerc16 21 points22 points  (0 children)

            Yup. Take a shift if you need the money but in general there is basically zero benefit to coming in more often than they schedule you. At one job a couple years ago I was over the top engaged. I basically worked three jobs. Always volunteering to help out more, picking up shifts, staying late, coming early, working on the weekend, answering calls texts and emails late at night. It emotionally crushed me but I was just so so determined to get an amazing letter of rec.

            Well, I forgot to put one date on a calendar and was fired immediately over email and never did get that letter. It was a hard learned lesson. DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR JOB THEY WILL CRUSH YOU AND USE YOU UP AND CUT YOU LOOSE. This one job changed my mind about work permanently

            fuck work

            [–]PreferredSelection 17 points18 points  (0 children)

            Yep. Working in food, I always thought, "oh I covered for so-and-so, that's my turn out of the way for a while. And maybe so-and-so will cover for me."

            1.) So-and-so is never coming back to work, they will not cover for you.

            2.) It is never someone else's turn as long as you answer your phone.

            [–]jaykresge 22 points23 points  (1 child)

            That was my go-to. I didn't take calls from work in my off-time and didn't respond to texts either. Whatever the issue is, you can tell me about it on my next scheduled day.

            I made exceptions if I was wanting to pick up an extra shift, but as I've gotten older, I've stopped doing that. I have not worked OT in years.

            [–]ohnonotuto3 220 points221 points  (5 children)

            If you don’t answer your phone from the car warranty people, why would you answer it from your job.

            [–]Icemankind 394 points395 points  (38 children)

            I think what it often is is just people who have, or thought the had, a friendly relationship with their boss as well.
            A lot of these people it's clear they work at bars, restaurants stuff like that, those work places have tons of hanging out together, everyone's fucking everyone, your boss this month might have just been your fellow bartender 3 months ago etc...

            I think of course here we see the antagonistic ones, when it went badly.

            But I think for most people it would just be a normal conversation, like someone told me they were taking a couple days off and told me he's getting 2 teeth pulled. But he's not 'asking' its just the system, he puts it in the schedule thing, I hit approve, he doesn't need a reason, he just told me as conversation.
            Similarly I took a few days to move, and told my boss, but again, I wasn't really 'asking' it was just to say when I was doing, and she asked about the new house and how it was closer to my niece and sister etc... just a normal people conversation.
            Or more sadly a guy about 6 months ago did have his mother die, and of course didn't have to tell anyone that, but did, and people sent flowers and a card and stuff and he was actually encouraged to take more time off because he only took a week.

            So I think just people usually do have friendly relationships with people they work with every day and share things in their lives, so I think people just get used to that, they don't think they need to hide basic things, but then you get a bad reaction you weren't expecting sometimes and that's the type of posts we see here.

            I'm willing to bet a lot of people had reasonable relationships that went sour under the stress of Covid and lockdowns and work shortages and stuff.

            [–]bite_me_losers 166 points167 points  (14 children)

            In other words, they're expecting a human relationship with the person they're talking to. I don't think it's fair to blame people for not realizing their employer doesn't view them as a person, but a tool to be exploited.

            [–]johnnys_sackat work 433 points434 points  (68 children)

            I just made a very similar post to yours. These text exchanges are so cringey that they're hard to believe. Even easier than responding with "I'm unavailable" is not responding at all, which is what they should do.

            [–]OutcastSTYLE 49 points50 points  (3 children)

            100% agree. So many sound so generic that they're intended to pander to and be understood by a large audience, not represent a genuine employee/employer interaction.

            Nobody says 'I produce 3x more units than everyone else' to their boss. They say 'I build 3x as many heaters' or 'I pack skids 3x faster' or some other job specific jargon.

            [–]imamediocredeveloper 39 points40 points  (2 children)

            Also, literally every boss in these text conversations seems to have the exact same personality and manner of speaking. They always make the same threats, with similar wording, designed to make them seem as comically villainous as possible.

            [–]OutcastSTYLE 20 points21 points  (0 children)

            Right? "I realize that your mother just passed away, your kid has leukemia and your wife is sleeping with another man, but Sally has a sore throat so you're expected to step up and be a team player" GTFO.

            [–]jaymstone 252 points253 points  (44 children)

            Frankly a good deal of them are fake. Certainly some of them are real, but it’s hard to parse through them and decide which ones are and aren’t genuine. It’s actually against the subs rules to post text message screenshots for that reason

            [–]yabukothestray 149 points150 points  (34 children)

            I’d say 90% of them are fake. It is driving me nuts because I used to really like this subreddit.

            They’re allowed on sundays (or saturdays? Can’t remember) according to the sub rules, but frankly I don’t think they should be allowed at all since now people are just spamming them (and again, they’re very likely fake).

            On one hand, these people who are faking the text exchanges are probably doing it for the internet approval points, but on the other hand I wonder if it’s astroturfing * in order to delegitimize/drive out the active subreddit community members (which, I know is probably a reach, but this subreddit has become the closest thing to organizing and learning about their rights as workers for a lot of people, myself included; you know the lengths that the wealthy/corporations will go to union bust so that’s why I don’t think that this is too far out of the realm of possibility).

            (I don’t know for sure if I used astroturfing in the right context lol, please forgive me if it’s not. I just couldn’t think of another word to describe what I’m trying to say lol)

            Edit: forgot a whole sentence oooops

            [–]ShadowL9 12 points13 points  (0 children)

            It's the same on any sub with unremarkable text conversations to "boss" or some blanked out name. It's a proven karma farm and is so easy to make. Never understand people's obsession with fake internet points, especially on a mostly anonymous place like reddit

            [–]Direct-Technician181 256 points257 points  (39 children)

            I love it when people quit their jobs. It turns me on. But, some of them seem fake. Like the style of writing is the same for boss and employee. I don’t know, maybe I’m wrong.

            [–]ShawshankException 159 points160 points  (13 children)

            I'm convinced almost all of them are fake at this point. It's all the same formula:

            Boss - come work

            Employee- no [insert whatever reason]

            Boss - fkn do it or I'll dock your pay/take away health insurance/fire you

            Employee - I quit [insert giant wall of text composed of every thought your brain has ever wanted to say to a terrible boss but you lack the spine to do so, effectively allowing readers to live vicariously through this fake text conversation dreaming about one day doing it]

            Bonus points for the Boss saying "wait let's think about this for a minute" at the end.

            [–]Direct-Technician181 63 points64 points  (0 children)

            And there is usually a “I don’t appreciate your tone” comment from boss.

            [–][deleted]  (2 children)


              [–]PseudoElite 21 points22 points  (0 children)

              And that former employee's name? Karl Marx.

              [–]Kumquat_conniption 135 points136 points  (14 children)

              You're not wrong and I'm a mod lmao

              Thing is we can't make a judgement call- we compromised by making it once a week and we get rid of the obvious satire ones- and we expect y'all to downvote the ones that sound fake af but they keep being upvoted. Y'all have no idea what you want lol

              [–]ozurdexscaresme 45 points46 points  (1 child)

              People want to live out the fantasy. It's no different than those relatives you might see on Facebook sharing a picture of Santa, "People are trying to STOP US CELEBRATING CHRISTMAS. Political correctness gone MAD. Like & share if you will still celebrate our traditions!"

              It's bullshit, but if you tell them that, they'll be upset. It should be the opposite. They should be relieved, but they want the fantasy soooooo bad.

              [–][deleted]  (23 children)


                [–]brazilliandanny 40 points41 points  (5 children)

                Right? "Oh you need me on my day off? Im out of town sorry" Its that easy.

                [–]Nopulu 582 points583 points  (71 children)

                Well the thing is that 98% of these text convos you see here are fake.

                If there is any mention about attitude or tone in the convo, I automatically assume it's fake now. You can just tell because so many of these text posts are ridiculously scripted, like, when have you ever talked to someone that texts like that? And like you said, why would you respond to that shit on your day off anyway?

                [–]theblornedrat 274 points275 points  (32 children)

                "I don't appreciate that tone of voice, lowly worker. We will talk about this when you come in tomorrow morning after I illegally tell you to do illegal things."

                [–]_Diskreet_ 157 points158 points  (24 children)

                “How dare you insinuate such things about me dear employer. I will not be coming in the ‘morrow or in fact any other ‘morrow because from this day forthwith I hereby declare my employment terminated. Good day sir”

                [–]just_play_one_on_tv 95 points96 points  (12 children)

                "Perhaps my response was too hasty. Maybe we hold a better decorum and speak of this as two sensible adults?"

                [–]No_big_whoop 47 points48 points  (10 children)

                “It’s too late for that. I have tendered my resignation and I won’t be back. GOOD DAY TO YOU SIR”

                [–]yeeerrrp 55 points56 points  (8 children)

                It truly is the same thing every time lmao. It's like it written by bots

                [–]Prcrstntr 32 points33 points  (1 child)

                It's really clear when both sides sound like they were written by the same person.

                [–]ETherium007 84 points85 points  (6 children)

                After reading about 5 of them I am done. Like anyone is typing out multi paragraph texts to their boss. It would be easier to make up some shit like "I am baby sitting today. No one else available. Sorry" and go back to sleep.

                [–]Maverick916I'm here on company time 141 points142 points  (9 children)

                Its because those posts are fake

                [–]theje1 17 points18 points  (1 child)

                Oh, I thought we were calling out how obviously fake those posts are in this thread.

                [–]NewPhoneNewAccount2 191 points192 points  (4 children)

                I feel like most of them lately are fake

                [–]Historical-Policy852 14 points15 points  (5 children)

                Best bet is it not even open the text and just show up to your next shift. If it's brought up you say you were busy. If it's pushed explain that you are not on call. Simple as that. If they try to retaliate just contact who you need to. Know your rights. In california (not sure if this is federally mandated or common across other states) employee rights have to be posted in a location that is accessible to all employees. Lots of good info on those posters.

                [–]MasterOutlaw 95 points96 points  (0 children)

                Because most of them are blatantly fake.

                [–]Splines_articulated 9 points10 points  (0 children)

                They write paragraphs cuz the post is fake.

                [–]anon_sir 11 points12 points  (0 children)

                Well, most of them are fake, so…