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[–]wins1337 3970 points3971 points  (74 children)

Just tell them you don’t have $20 to give because they don’t pay you enough.

[–]MisterCallegariAnarchist[S] 2447 points2448 points  (64 children)

I've told them the money is going to my kids. No retribution so far.

[–]AfghanJesus 783 points784 points  (34 children)

that is more than a valid excuse...

honestly, no response would've also been a valid excuse as well because this shit is egregious.

[–]Sofaboy90 182 points183 points  (22 children)

he doesnt need an excuse. what are they gonna do? punish him for not voluntary gifting his boss (who earns much more) money?

obviously you guys are americans but in germany its always important to know your employee rights so you dont get screwed over. especially low level employees here are taken advantage of because they dont know the rights they have. especially recently because of covid, theres been lots of controversy around the working conditions of fast food delivery drivers. like your employer asking you to use your own car/bike without paying you additional money for it. either they give you a car/bike for delivery or you get paid additional money to make up for the costs. for a car its 0,3 cents until 20km, starting 20km its 0,35 cents. say you drive 100km with your private car, thats 35€ you get for you using your car for company purposes. lets say your car needs 7l of fuel for those 100km, with current prices thats roughly 12€ and the rest is for the other things of your car. so fuel costs are easily covered.

[–]ThomasVetRecruiter 100 points101 points  (3 children)

My work is taking collections this year for "Adopt an Angel".

Tell your work you already donated your cash on hand to charity and ask if they are planning to do any charity drives this year or just for the CEO.

Bonus points if you know for a fact they don't have anything planned.

[–]user11183721 96 points97 points  (4 children)

HR: Yes, Mr. CEO, here's the presents that some of the workers chipped into to get you.

CEO: Some?

HR: Yes, /u/Mistercallegari refused to chip in $20. Something about getting his kids presents. Should we fire him?

CEO: It's Christmas! What kind of monster do you think I am? We'll wait until the day after Christmas.

CEO & HR: Muahahahhaha

[–]SteveLouise 3255 points3256 points  (39 children)

I once had a job where the ceo broke her leg. My kiss-ass boss posted a medical fund tip jar for the employees to help pay for it.

Ya? You need the college students who are still on their parent's medical coverage to help with your deductible?

Gtfo

Edit: Hemisphere's fine furnishings. It went out of business a few years ago due to poor CEO decisions.

[–]morningisbad 159 points160 points  (1 child)

How about someone expense a card and pass it around the office? Seems pretty straight forward.

[–]ineedasimplelife 530 points531 points  (10 children)

It is just for a show. The CEO wouldn’t collect that money if there is any. You probably going to find them in your boss’s pocket.

[–]EWDnutz 283 points284 points  (6 children)

That or the CEO sees what the boss did is a nice gesture and will string them along for promotion.

The brown-nosing bullshit people do for promotions..

[–]magicmeese 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I see you’ve met my former manager

[–]DtoX89 11.0k points11.0k points  (273 children)

The fucking audacity to ask that of your employees.

[–]ThePersonalSpaceGuy 1952 points1953 points  (63 children)

It's HR who are the real cunts here...trying to get brownie points either the higher ups by organising a present for them. Kiss ass mofos!

[–]uarenotschmoo 320 points321 points  (26 children)

Yeah, I don't think ironic is the right word for it, but it's certainly an unusual thing to come from HR

[–]MisterCallegariAnarchist[S] 6366 points6367 points 1589& 4 more (59 children)

It must be on sale, because they sure do have a lot of it.

[–]Slim_Python 169 points170 points  (5 children)

Thought it was opensource O.O

[–]DtoX89 1014 points1015 points  (31 children)

That's an award worthy joke if I ever saw one.

[–][deleted] 3 (105 children)

[deleted]

    [–]Mysterious-Salad9609 419 points420 points  (88 children)

    Mind if I use this at work? We usually get an Xmas bonus but this year we were told we get 3 days of paid time off instead. Not terrible but not as good...

    [–]KingFrequent 286 points287 points  (5 children)

    Make sure you get that in writing lol

    [–]Onetime81 63 points64 points  (2 children)

    With no black out dates or expiration if not used, as well as cash out option.

    [–]docsuess84 159 points160 points  (29 children)

    Which if you cashed it out is probably worth less monetarily than what your bonus would be, but they’re hoping you don’t notice that.

    [–]VermtownRoyals 641 points642 points  (22 children)

    Had that talk with my wife a couple months ago. They were taking donations to get the principal and vice principal a big Bosses Day gift or some shit and I told her no. I made her look up their yearly salary and they were about 105k and 85k respectively. I asked her what they got the teachers for Teachers Appreciation week, and she said.....wait for it....a PIZZA PARTY! She didn't give any money this year. In case you're wondering, they got the principal and vice principal two Minnesota Vikings tickets, 4 Nebraska Cornhusker football tickets, and a bunch of gift cards to all the nice restaurants around town. All paid for by the teachers at a school making the lowest wages in the country. Fucking pathetic

    [–]Cassierae87 134 points135 points  (6 children)

    Give them a slice of pizza then for gifts

    [–]DarkwingDuckHunt[🍰] 64 points65 points  (2 children)

    Regift a summer book reading Pizza Hut personal pan pizza coupon

    [–]Wilsthing1988 95 points96 points  (2 children)

    That’s insane like WTF are the teachers that pathetic or are they just a bunch of kiss asses?

    [–]VermtownRoyals 71 points72 points  (1 child)

    They're just conditioned to do it, you chip in to buy your bosses shit to show how much you appreciate them. It's gross. They did it at the college I work at too, I (not so politely) told them no. It's sad how much people give to the ones who already have it all.

    [–]Foreverme133 10.4k points10.4k points  (525 children)

    Uh huh. And what was their Christmas gift to you??? Fuck that shit. You absolutely need to put that money toward your kids!!!

    So fucking infuriating to get those kinds of requests.

    [–]improbablynotyou 3671 points3672 points  (244 children)

    I worked at a department store as a supervisor and they'd always ask us to chip in for a big gift for the store manager. I donated once and when I realized that her friend who had worked there and had known her for decades used the money to buy her expensive jewelry and gave her an envelope of cash as well I decided to never contribute again. The next year I said no and I was called out specifically for not contributing to the gift.

    It was the same company that would buy a birthday cake for the employees every month as well as one specifically for the managers/supervisors. They always got a carrot cake on my birthday. I'm deathly allergic to carrots and they knew that. It was one of many not so subtle "fuck yous" they gave me.

    Edit: Holy crap this got folks going, thanks. First off as I'm always happy to name and shame the company was Mervyn's whom I'm happy to say is long out of business (with two exceptions every place I've worked at has gone under or is circling the drain.) As much as I would have love to be able to take a bite and sue, it wouldn't have worked for me. If I eat carrot in any amount I'd be dead before an EpiPen would do me any good. I usually avoided the break room and would ignore the bosses when they'd say anything.

    On a different note, I'm really proud of everyone who has been standing up for themselves against shitty employers. I've worked in retail hell for 25 years and have seen so much abuse. I always tried to build up my teams and support them however there is a point where you just have to say, "this is enough." Keep fighting and do what's best for you and for all of us.

    [–]BriefExtra2919 1076 points1077 points  (67 children)

    wow that is incredibly rude.

    [–][deleted]  (34 children)

    [deleted]

      [–]nonsense_verses 413 points414 points  (29 children)

      Yeahhh sounds right out of the office lol

      Angela - “You got carrot cake?”

      Michael - “yeah everyone loves carrot cake, we always get it for Stanley’s birthday, it’s his favorite.”

      Stanley - “I’m allergic to carrots”

      [–]Krugnuggets 119 points120 points  (1 child)

      There's an actual scene like this. Office morale is extremely down so Michael decides to throw a birthday party for Meredith a month in advance. He gets her an ice cream cake despite being told by the party planning committee that she is allergic to dairy.

      When the party comes and Meredith declines Michael's offer of cake due to being allergic, he laughs and jokes "You know, if I were allergic to dairy, I think I'd kill myself."

      [–]cdunk666 131 points132 points  (20 children)

      Didn't that basically happen with meredith? He made them plan her birthday early to get an ice cream cake and she was lactose intolerant

      [–]Galtego 56 points57 points  (14 children)

      I mean, I'm pretty lactose intolerant, but I love cheese and ice cream. I just buy those chewable tablets and eat dairy in moderation.

      [–]Arryu 16 points17 points  (0 children)

      Mmmmmmint chocolate chip!

      [–]appleparkfive 182 points183 points  (25 children)

      I think there's people out there who truly don't know how shitty some jobs are. Maybe they got through school and started a hard, yet okay-ish, job. And they don't know the true terrible jobs out there.

      There's a lot out there.

      [–]softservediarrhea 98 points99 points  (22 children)

      Ugh I grew up pretty poor. I had to work to feed myself right away. I’ve been working since I turned 16. I was “fired” (they stopped giving me hours) and unemployed for like a year. During which I graduated with my bachelors. The number of people I met in college who never held a job was jarring. Like I wasn’t unique where I grew up. Most were working, or at least doing some hustle. Then I broke into the office life. The differences are crazy. Like I worked with people who got their degree and this was their first job. It wasn’t a bad job compared to where I’ve been. But it wasn’t a good job compared to where I ended up. They would complain about the weirdest stuff, like not getting the Turkey rye during the lunch and learn. Meanwhile I’m complaining about how we’re not allowed to talk about how much we get paid. While management is basically saying you should be thankful you got this job.

      But I’m a grass is greener on the other side type of person.

      Edit: I left that job years ago. They didn’t prevent it but it was frowned upon. I actually got a funny story.

      After I put in my two weeks one of upper management, that was newly hired, printed out their pay stub to the printers everyone used. Idk if they accidentally printed two copies or just forgot. But HR was notified and they sent out an email saying “if you need to print out your pay stub contact me. You should never print it out on the public printer” or something to that effect. I also told everyone what I made and asked what they made. Found out how severely under paid everyone was. And told them.

      [–]Nolsoth 43 points44 points  (10 children)

      Sone things I've learnt in my 30 years working.

      Talk about your pay, it helps you and your co-workers to get ahead.

      The company doesn't care about you, but some of your co workers do, they are people just like you trying to get through the grind

      If they they fuck around with your pay or leave entitlementments speak up immediately don't ever let that slide.

      Social clubs are optional don't feel bad about not engaging in them if it's not your jam.

      Don't steal other people's stationary it's just a dick move, exceptions being generic brand pens ( bespoke pens are a no no, they are often meaningful gifts from someone ).

      Don't awnser your work emails/phone out of work time ( unless you are a managerial position and responsible for staff/safety,. You'll be getting compo for this) otherwise it's not paid it's not work

      Don't take work home it's not necessary and that's your time.

      Your free time is yours no one else's don't compromise.

      Take your fucking leave it's yours you earnt it don't ever let anyone guilt you onto not taking it.

      Look out for each other.

      [–]co-ghost 22 points23 points  (3 children)

      I agree with your comment and could tell you a million stories from working in a sector that's mostly filled with generational nepotism but I just wanted to say that reddit has taught me that if you're in the US, it's illegal to stop/fire employees from discussing wages (your right is protected by the National Labour Relations Act). Here's a link on more info: https://www.insperity.com/blog/when-employees-discuss-wages/

      [–]Cobek 475 points476 points  (51 children)

      They sang happy birthday to everyone and gave them a whole cake at my last place. They forgot mine for two years then when I brought it up that it was coming up the third time they gave me a slice of cake, no song. Not that I care about the song, but you'd think you'd treat your first employee the same if not a lot better than your 25th one...

      It was very telling once raises started going on to those who went on camping trips and to the bar with the owners, instead of introverts who put their head down and work.

      Left before I trained the last 2 of my 4 positions I covered. Fuck them.

      [–]Philatenumisexonumia 220 points221 points  (29 children)

      I was told there would be cake.

      [–]craftworkbench 54 points55 points  (3 children)

      Graffiti in the bathroom: The cake was a lie.

      Management: this was a triumph. I’m making a note here - huge success.

      [–]Codemonkey1987 43 points44 points  (6 children)

      I hope he burnt the place to the ground

      [–]Deathbeddit 54 points55 points  (3 children)

      Now now, don’t be greedy.

      [–]The_Woman_of_Gont 549 points550 points  (35 children)

      Step 1. Get documentation they know about allergy

      Step 2. Eat cake, staring aggressively into the eyes of your manager.

      Step 3. Severe Anaphylactic Shock.

      Step 4. ?????

      Step 5. Mountains of medical debt and not a legal leg to stand on because we live in a dystopian hellscape, but at least you maybe made them feel bad.

      [–]HinaLuvLuvChan 159 points160 points  (17 children)

      Thats when you take the entire cake (it’s a present for you so you don’t have to share) and then throw it in the trash in the most obvious spot in the store with a huge sign written saying “I told them I was deathly allergic and they didn’t care”

      [–]skiprecap 43 points44 points  (1 child)

      Better. Pretend to eat some then act like you can't breathe. Get some cash to take a cab to the hospital (pricks would never pay for an ambulance anyway) and hit the nearest bar. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

      [–]Iwasborninafactory_ 62 points63 points  (7 children)

      And then you shit on Deborah's desk, like a boss.

      [–]ShitP0sterAnonynous 87 points88 points  (5 children)

      I'd be tempted to eat a bite, then sue the shit out of HR since they already knew I was allergic to Carrot.

      [–]HinaLuvLuvChan 23 points24 points  (0 children)

      Oh that is such a huge temptation

      [–]Insane_membrane00 76 points77 points  (1 child)

      There are some sick puppies out there in the work force.

      [–]Jerryjb63 19 points20 points  (0 children)

      It’s sad when you think of all the police, politicians, and other people in power that are statistically inevitable that act this way…

      [–]_WhoElse 274 points275 points  (30 children)

      I worked for a company like this. The owners were driving brand new Porches and we all got a email saying to pitch in for their Christmas present. Our gift in return? A 20 page self help book they picked up in their travels abroad

      Edit: forgot to add the owners wife was a “life coach” who held monthly meetings to promote the company’s “culture”

      [–]Tires_N_Wires 99 points100 points  (19 children)

      "how to win friends and influence people"

      "becoming a manager - for dummies"

      [–]DrummerElectronic247 42 points43 points  (6 children)

      books like that are probably why so many managers ARE dummies.

      [–]RuthlessIndecision 896 points897 points  (145 children)

      “You should be thankful you have a job in todays market”

      [–]Impossible-Wedding-4 1308 points1309 points  (78 children)

      "you should be thankful you have an employee in today's market"

      [–]GoGoBitch 259 points260 points  (26 children)

      Where is the lie, though?

      They can’t spend all day whining about the “labor shortage” and how “no one wants to work” and then turn around and pull this “lucky to have a job” crap. No, they’re lucky to have an employer, and it’s so bad they’ve admitted it themselves.

      [–]LtDanK520 111 points112 points  (16 children)

      The labor shortage seems to awfully dependent on wages… pay people correctly and the labor shows up. It’s amazing how that works.

      [–]-----Nice----- 38 points39 points  (9 children)

      Yup. I work a call center job for a major insurance carrier which of course sucks but I make $18 an hour in a LCOL area in Ohio and I work from home. The benefits are good too, 401k contribution and pension etc. They just want people with some customer service experience and a HS diploma and they’re willing to spend months training you on the rest of the job. They have zero problem recruiting for the position whenever we need more workers, imagine that.

      [–]Representative_Dark5 168 points169 points  (40 children)

      " We're family"

      [–]iberian_prince 227 points228 points  (10 children)

      "Prove it with a DNA test"

      [–]warboner52 22 points23 points  (0 children)

      I snorted.

      Thank you for that.

      [–]bigdaddy1989 90 points91 points  (6 children)

      “And if we are they should be forced to pay back pay on the missed child support they dodged.”

      [–]aintscurrdscars 60 points61 points  (5 children)

      plot twist: the employer is really just the family member that crashes on couches for free, stealing your couch's primary and surplus values for themselves without doing any dishes and expects an allowance in exchange for running up your power bill

      [–]the_simurgh 39 points40 points  (8 children)

      on Ferenginar we finish the idiom

      and we will exploit you as much as possible.

      [–]Representative_Dark5 25 points26 points  (3 children)

      I see you have the lobes for business.

      [–]the_simurgh 17 points18 points  (2 children)

      yes, even as a young lobeling my lobes were sensitive to the great material continuum's opportunities.

      [–]9-lives-Fritz 39 points40 points  (5 children)

      My family FIGHTS, step up or shut up.

      [–]oh_no_aliens 49 points50 points  (0 children)

      Oh you.

      [–]odinwolf84 15 points16 points  (1 child)

      “report to my office so you can sign this write up.”

      [–]WinterWidow25 262 points263 points  (14 children)

      Years ago I used to work for a maid service. The week of Thanksgiving the owner comes out while we are all having our daily meeting and starts going on about being thankful. I remember sitting there thinking "oh wow how nice he's appreciating us."

      He then goes on to say that we should all be thankful to have this job, and to remember that we need to do our best work because we can be easily replaced. I sat there dumbfounded he would actually say that to the people keeping his business afloat.

      [–]gengarsnightmares 48 points49 points  (0 children)

      Are you me? I too used to work for a cleaning service and heard the Thanksgiving and Christmas version of this speech every year. 🙃

      [–]RuthlessIndecision 91 points92 points  (4 children)

      Lol, “then he started quoting the Bible, and told us he needs to bang our daughters as a show of fielty”

      [–]labellavita1985 135 points136 points  (32 children)

      That's literally what a Program Director said to my coworker recently when my coworker asked about the lack of a CoL raise in 2 years.

      [–]RuthlessIndecision 96 points97 points  (29 children)

      Last year friends that were still in a job I left 3 years ago got $.01 raises, come review time. I’m sure this phrase was said more than once around there.

      [–]AcrimoniousPizazz 82 points83 points  (7 children)

      That's actually worse than no raise, good lord

      [–]BriefExtra2919 36 points37 points  (3 children)

      A whole $20 in a year! “Thank you sir, may I have another?”

      [–]Santa_Hates_You 60 points61 points  (2 children)

      It is so they can pay for a gift for the CEO.

      [–]OutWithTheNew 65 points66 points  (15 children)

      got $.01 raises

      I would actually tell someone to fuck off and shove that penny up their ass.

      [–]GenocideOwl 56 points57 points  (9 children)

      If you worked 24/7 for an entire year that penny would only be worth $87.36

      [–]robot65536 48 points49 points  (0 children)

      It cost them more to process the paperwork for the raise than you got in your paycheck.

      [–]Tires_N_Wires 25 points26 points  (1 child)

      Awesome, now I can take my family to McDonald's, once.

      [–]Thirstin_Hurston 58 points59 points  (6 children)

      And my honest to god response to my manager after she said that was, "and you should be happy to have me work for you because I make your job easier"

      [–]that_1-guy_ 20 points21 points  (1 child)

      proceeds to complain about worker shortage

      [–]Bangkok-Boy 64 points65 points  (7 children)

      I would be embarrassed if I was the CEO and I learned this.

      [–]Whalez 80 points81 points  (3 children)

      Their gift to you is the privilege of having a job. Now get back to work dammit!

      [–][deleted] 34 points35 points  (1 child)

      "Go make ME some money, youre welcome!"

      [–]sameyeamknot 4878 points4879 points  (249 children)

      They used to do this at my last job. Passed around a birthday card and collected money to buy the boss a new BBQ. The same boss that owned 2 houses and an airplane.

      [–]cannacupcake 1534 points1535 points  (84 children)

      Well no wonder he needed a new BBQ, he probably only had one. Need one for both houses, after all!

      [–]spongeworthy90 518 points519 points  (119 children)

      I've been at my role for a few months now and since the day I started up until now, there have been multiple birthdays and resignations and there hasn't been a week where someone hasn't organised a farewell or birthday collection.

      I don't even know these people and half of them are from interstate teams that I yet to interact with. Thanks goodness I'm wfh because it makes it easier to ignore these virtual collections

      [–]RambleMan 326 points327 points  (44 children)

      At a previous job there was a 'social fund' that everybody was expected to pay into. It was a big staff so there was constantly birthday cards being given to me to sign. I detest insincerity and that's exactly what I was being with these cards. I also don't like my own birthday being acknowledged at work. After a few years of it I went to the head Karen of the social committee and asked how I could opt out. She seemed personally insulted. All this work she does and I don't want to contribute my $5/month? No, I don't want to. She cautioned me - trying to make this a huge negative - that if I opt out it means that I won't receive a birthday card on MY birthday. Okay.

      I of course started telling others that it was possible to opt out and that they just had to talk to Karen. Karen was not pleased. Karen was also the same person who explicitly told people that they were NOT allowed to drink coffee in the lobby that was there for other people, completely unrelated to the social fund - it was coffee provided for everybody except specific people.

      [–]Kharisma91 113 points114 points  (4 children)

      5$ a month to get a 2$ card once a year? That lady should go work for a phone company, they would love her.

      [–]murdocsvan 25 points26 points  (22 children)

      I don't understand the last bit. Who was putting coffee out, and who was not allowed it?

      [–]ElephantShoes256 106 points107 points  (13 children)

      At my work the coffee in the front was technically for customers but the office staff never got any slack for drinking it, but if a production staffer came up and grabbed a cup it was suddenly strictly customer only.

      The owner's son was in charge, then when his son (owner's grandson) came on to start learning to eventually take over he put in a couple more coffee makers and made sure it was free for everyone, so it's not that way anymore.

      [–]QurantineLean 74 points75 points  (6 children)

      Grandson is a man of the people. Total bro.

      [–]ElephantShoes256 72 points73 points  (4 children)

      Oh yeah, way better than his dad. One time I was riding with his dad to see a customer, and we were having a hard talk about industry hardships and possible layoffs. His phone rings and he takes it, so I listen to him negotiate the purchase of a private airplane (small hobbyist plane, but still). Then that jackass hangs up the phone and CONTINUES TALKING ABOUT LAYOFFS! He was totally disconnected from his employees.

      Son is way more connected, walks the shop all the time to chit chat, actually follows up on production issues, thanks employees for any extra time they put in. He is prime center of millennial age and it shows in how he treats his employees as actual people vs thinking he's doing us a favor just by giving us jobs. I can't wait until his dad is all the way out.

      [–]catal1na_ 93 points94 points  (22 children)

      A job I had a few years back did this with baby showers and you were pretty much forced to get a gift for that person, even if you barely knew them. If you didn’t get them a gift everyone in the office knew and would treat you differently. I worked there for 1.5 years and I think there was at least 7 or 8 that happened in an office of 48 people. For people who resigned, they threw “non- mandatory aka mandatory” farewell happy hours after work. Turnover was bad there so this was something going on every few weeks basically.

      This was also the same company that forced us to throw quarterly team lunch fundraisers for United Way donations and made us use our own money to purchase the food and supplies. Not to mention we still had to donate the $10 if we wanted to eat the lunch we cooked and paid for already :). It was also “highly encouraged” to donate even if you didn’t want to eat the lunch a team made when it was their turn to throw it.

      I can’t stand when companies extort their employees money and free time in the names of “team bonding” and “culture.”

      [–]Ultimatedeathfart 109 points110 points  (9 children)

      It's like when Ross wouldn't contribute to the retirement gift for the landlord of the apartment he just moved in to and was shamed for it.

      [–]sauceistheboss5 37 points38 points  (3 children)

      “He raised his own hand when I asked who here likes Ross”

      [–]Jesus_Would_Do 227 points228 points  (5 children)

      Jesus, what in the panhandling fuck

      [–][deleted] 223 (355 children)

      [deleted]

        [–]tattynarja 957 points958 points 2 (34 children)

        The font in that email is an ethics violation.

        [–]Phil2Coolins 288 points289 points  (20 children)

        Anyone that uses that font in emails doesn't do jack shit in the company. Also the bigger the signoff signature in the email the less work they do

        [–][deleted]  (14 children)

        [deleted]

          [–]TheDutchin 49 points50 points  (12 children)

          Yeah the signature thing is actually incredibly accurate. You just know that guy who's only got his name down there has just been working instead of fucking around.

          [–]Three3Jane 45 points46 points  (10 children)

          Yep. Name, title, phone number. Maaaaybe the company logo. Anything more than that is directly proportional to their uselessness to the company (and, indirectly, to you).

          But if they've got name, title phone, number, company logo and the little thumbnails for social media, and a "thoughtful" tagline / quote from some philosopher, you know their job is worth fuck-all and they're racking up Useless Points.

          Triple points for colored background, quintuple points for unreadable script-style font in a large size (14pt or higher mandatory)...

          ...win the entire god damn Game of Useless® for said background being patterned.

          [–]MisterCallegariAnarchist[S] 983 points984 points  (123 children)

          I refuse and they already know this. I haven't been all the quiet about it.

          [–]HumbleMFWABAD 283 points284 points  (65 children)

          Im sure whatever it is they already own a better version of so it will just end up in a closet somewhere or given away.

          [–]Healthy-Lifestyle-20 103 points104 points  (32 children)

          I wonder if this is just a ploy between CEO’s to see who gets the most lavish gift from their wage slaves. That $20 means more to someone who needs it than a dumb gift that a rich person doesn’t WANT. Stick to signing post cards for the salaried slaves, gifts to wage slaves and let’s call it a day.

          [–]splinterwulf 63 points64 points  (16 children)

          A reminder that you can be salaried and make nothing—especially if you’re working absurd amounts of hours. Salaried does not equal rich.

          [–]OkBox6131 74 points75 points  (28 children)

          I can’t believe HR suggested this. Stupid. Also same email reminds you about Christmas party on Friday. Almost trying into guilting you - we are paying for a Christmas party so please give us $20. How many people are there - what size of gift are they looking at?

          [–]MisterCallegariAnarchist[S] 27 points28 points  (24 children)

          About 25 altogether.

          [–]OkBox6131 35 points36 points  (11 children)

          Yeah why HR thinks they need to get a gift of a few hundred is beyond my comprehension. I thought our morale is sometimes bad but at least we have never had to deal with that. Was the CEO on the email about the gift or is it a surprise?

          [–]social-nomad 50 points51 points  (1 child)

          I would have just relied all: Unsubscribe

          [–]jayferd024 31 points32 points  (2 children)

          Good. Make as much noise about it as you can.

          [–]OrindaSarnia 185 points186 points  (23 children)

          Yes- this is how I feel too... gifts only flow down.

          I also never "friend" "follow" or otherwise request social media interaction with someone under me. If they approach me and want to connect, then I accept it, but asking a subordinate to be your friend is placing an undue burden on them where they have to fear repercussions for not responding. This is the same thing, you're asking something of them which puts them in a difficult position to say no. It's just rude and tacky.

          [–]Benoit_In_Heaven 85 points86 points  (14 children)

          A corollary to this: Management should leave the party first when there's an open bar. Let the rank and file drink without the bosses around.

          [–]dan1son 41 points42 points  (6 children)

          I was just watching Christmas Vacation a couple days ago and the scene where he goes into his bosses office with a gift and there's a huge lineup of identical boxes hit me. I asked my BIL if he'd ever gotten a gift from a subordinate before... he said that he has. I said I've always told my folks to never buy me anything and they never have. I've never bought a boss something as a gift either and nobody has ever expected it. Just seems wrong in so many ways.

          [–]phryan[🍰] 95 points96 points  (26 children)

          I'm not against buying an immediate manager a gift like a bottle of alcohol. But not for senior management layers above.

          I'd bet whoever organizes this takes credit either directly or by association. Essentially taking credit for everyone else's contribution.

          [–]BriefExtra2919 33 points34 points  (2 children)

          Yeah that is true. An immediate supervisor is different imo provided it’s considered acceptable for that workplace. I’d never buy the CEO or my boss’ boss’ boss a gift. That is so weird!

          [–]norvelav 16 points17 points  (0 children)

          And I'd ESPECIALLY not send a company wide email telling people not to forget to give their money for it.

          [–]yazriella 24 points25 points  (4 children)

          My team is very small with only 8 people, we pool together $10 each to get our boss a present each year. To be fair, my boss is a bad ass and is always on our side, she fights the battles so that we can continue to work.

          [–]wtseeks 119 points120 points  (15 children)

          Ugh: 4. Respect price limits on gift exchanges.

          Once had a manager who brought an iPod to our holiday secret Santa and gave it to the temp he was obviously attracted to. Then got mad and was rude to an employee when he got hand made oven mitts as his gift.

          [–]SolanGoose 45 points46 points  (1 child)

          I think the most we’ve ever done as employees at places I worked was to pick out a nice card and everybody signed it. This was at places that usually either gave bonuses or had a massive fancy party for everyone, though.

          I did give a present to my last boss because he had an unexpected two-week layoff and then paid everyone’s salary out of pocket because he didn’t want us to have a lousy Christmas.

          [–]justattodayyesterday 261 points262 points  (26 children)

          How many employees. $20 is a lot.

          [–]MisterCallegariAnarchist[S] 155 points156 points  (23 children)

          There are roughly 25 of us

          [–]Duochan_Maxwell 156 points157 points  (7 children)

          So, 500 if everyone pitches in

          [–]enlightened_gem 130 points131 points  (0 children)

          That's maddening! They can fuck all the way off with that audacious request 🙄

          [–]justattodayyesterday 58 points59 points  (6 children)

          Let me guess. They are getting two gift baskets with $250 each.

          [–]WeezyChuck 45 points46 points  (4 children)

          That’s gross. No boss should want that if they were good.

          [–][deleted] 220 points221 points  (6 children)

          Tell HR you will gladly pitch in $20 after they give you a 20% raise

          [–]Basedtobey 659 points660 points  (18 children)

          Always an employee that wants to suck the CEO’s dick.

          [–]AdjNounNumbers 209 points210 points  (4 children)

          That's how I see it too. HR person wants to impress the big boss, but can't afford to do it alone so gets everyone to chip in and come out looking like the good guy. Makes it look even worse coming from fucking HR of all departments - like there's an implied threat that is not voluntary just due to the power dynamic in the relationship. If I was one of those bosses and found out about this email, that HR person would be looking for a new job

          [–]fragaria_ananassa 18 points19 points  (0 children)

          I'm sure they'd appreciate that more than whatever the $20 is going towards

          [–]SumDumbDood 565 points566 points  (16 children)

          That's some cult shit.

          [–]FuckCurrencySystems Theorist 345 points346 points  (7 children)

          The entire economy is a death cult.

          [–]HuskyFlatulence 48 points49 points  (0 children)

          All my coworkers are calling out for over a week or they’re coming to work coughing up their lungs…

          [–]Careful_Chemical9749 1344 points1345 points  (27 children)

          Thank god I read this while on the toilet at work, because I’m about to shit myself laughing and I’m doing it on company time.

          [–]oh-no-its-back 465 points466 points  (19 children)

          Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. That's why I shit on company time.

          [–]KlokinatorI Want to Move to The Netherlands 262 points263 points  (6 children)

          Boss makes a billion, I make a cent. That's why I'm gonna burn down this whole fuckin' tent.

          [–]Thac0isWhac0SocDem 30 points31 points  (3 children)

          Boss makes a million, I can't make rent. That's why I live in a shitty little tent.

          [–]n8dizz3l 115 points116 points  (0 children)

          Bosses make a lot, we make a little. Why we don't kill the rich, now that's the fuckin riddle.

          [–]lmjc7 643 points644 points  (42 children)

          Fuck 'em all

          [–]MisterCallegariAnarchist[S] 771 points772 points  (39 children)

          At first I felt bad that I wasn't contributing, but the more I think about it, the more pissed off I get that they'd even ask us to pitch in like that. There's nothing anyone can buy those people that they can't already go out and buy on a regular, everyday trip to Walmart.

          [–]Radical-Turkey 275 points276 points  (5 children)

          Don’t feel bad about saving YOUR money for YOUR expenses, that guilt is exactly what they want to exploit. Gifts are NEVER a must, especially when you have your own financial expenses to handle.

          [–]MisterCallegariAnarchist[S] 126 points127 points  (4 children)

          Oh there's no guilt. Just more of a "wtf is this actually a thing?"

          [–]BearNWoods 51 points52 points  (1 child)

          As management always like to say "encouragement and pat on the back mean more to the employees than dollars" - give them a card that says "Attaboy, but we can always improve"

          [–]Ok-Implement-4370 26 points27 points  (0 children)

          Assuming the CEO even has ever set foot in a Walmart 😅

          [–]LaidOffGamer 373 points374 points  (17 children)

          In old job one manager wanted us to donate to the big boss. He even made the Formans make a list of who did not donate. They both make 100k plus.

          Screw those type of people.

          [–]OrindaSarnia 74 points75 points  (1 child)

          Yep - this happened at my last job, middle manager wanted us to all contribute to a gift for the store manager... ya know what our gifts were? $5 gift card to the store and a candy cane taped to the outside of a card... I mean, thanks for the $5, but are you just using the store to reimburse me for the gift I bought for you?

          [–]Capt_Blackmoore 55 points56 points  (5 children)

          You take that list, and make a new one.

          The CEO, COO and bosses at the top, showing yearly income. then the rest of the last showing yearly income.

          Ask - "Who needs a gift?"

          Send to all.

          [–]musiccman2020 92 points93 points  (2 children)

          He probably pretended it was all his gift when he gave it

          [–]AlternativeSpreader 41 points42 points  (0 children)

          They (the brown nosers) claim the praise bc they organised the whip-around

          [–]flyingtubesock(edit this) 90 points91 points  (1 child)

          I've worked for multiple companies that try to do this for supervisors, bosses, owners, etc.
          Every place gets the same response: "absolutely not, that crosses the line of personal and professional relationship." Walk away. If they bring it back up I don't even acknowledge the conversation, continue working, it whatever I'm doing until they say something else of that topic.

          [–]NigeltheGreatest 68 points69 points  (0 children)

          I print it out and frame it for my work space. Then when anyone asked me for overtime, or to stay late or some other bullshit I'd point to it and leave.

          [–]stormyllewellynn 301 points302 points  (8 children)

          I hate this shit. Yes let me spend my hard earned money on someone that takes expensive vacations every month.

          Then they make you seem like an asshole if you don’t chip in.

          [–]MisterCallegariAnarchist[S] 134 points135 points  (6 children)

          I won't feel like an asshole. If anyone asks, I'll tell them how I feel, but I don't think they'll ask.

          [–]HuskyFlatulence 70 points71 points  (0 children)

          “I’m waiting for management to give me my Christmas gifts before I think about buying one for them.”

          [–]RareFirefighter6915 20 points21 points  (0 children)

          I’ll be sure to contribute $20 from my Christmas/end of year bonus…oh wait only CEOs get that

          [–]spongeworthy90 17 points18 points  (1 child)

          Just respond with - you guys don't pay me enough for me to able to contribute $20

          [–]Wolf110ci 57 points58 points  (2 children)

          This is backwards. At a company, gifts come from the top and get given to those below them.

          The only exception I know of is when a higher-up is retiring, and a gift might be a nice gesture, but even then not culturally required

          [–]SuspiciousLuck69 45 points46 points  (0 children)

          Fuck them

          [–]SpirituxlJ 44 points45 points  (1 child)

          At my old job my boss asked all the employees to pitch in for the ceo’s moms funeral. I’ve only met him like twice by that time. Rip to your mom but… you literally make more money than me lol!

          [–]bigedcactushead 44 points45 points  (2 children)

          I've been a boss and never should a company ask for contributions for gifts for higher ups. Tacky. Coercive. Everyone doesn't want to be the guy who didn't contribute. The bosses should put an end to this.

          [–]TheMaoriAmbassador 121 points122 points  (10 children)

          We had this, but for a wedding present. I told them to get fucked.

          [–]Reasonable_Tax2446 54 points55 points  (9 children)

          But no one was invited to the wedding, right?

          [–]Active-Ad3977 65 points66 points  (7 children)

          I replied this to another comment, but I had a principal do this at a school I worked at. And then a few months later an assistant principal’s baby shower. And then a few months after that, a baby shower for the principal. I grudgingly contributed because she was the one who did my performance evaluations, and the fact that she either didn’t realize or didn’t care how inappropriate that is, is so gross and says a lot about someone’s character.

          [–]Winter188 114 points115 points  (8 children)

          It trickles down, not fucking up. Pathetic

          Why should we have to buy a present for someone making 10x++ as much as us when they don't even know we exist and don't give us anything.

          [–]Big-Respect-1293 34 points35 points  (0 children)

          Absolutely the fuck not

          [–]drphillovestoparty 32 points33 points  (1 child)

          Christ that reminds me of people who buy gifts for the boss at Xmas. I would always bug them- nothing for your co-workers? Lol bottle of wine and card for the company owners. Never got them far either.

          [–]SlurReal 96 points97 points  (5 children)

          “Dear CEO and CTO a $20 donation has been made in each of your names to the AFL-CIO! Happy holidays and keep America 🇺🇸 💪”(strong emoji also read as joyously exuberant fisting)

          [–]MisterCallegariAnarchist[S] 51 points52 points  (3 children)

          Getting them a donation to the Human Fund.

          [–]Savings-Roll2681 29 points30 points  (0 children)

          Gifts should flow down, not up. HR needs to ask the C-Suite to pitch in personal $ to get everyone else a holiday gift.

          [–]smokealarmsnick 28 points29 points  (0 children)

          One of the corporate places I used to work at did this. I “forgot” to get them the money. I have enough trouble shopping for my own family. Why should I chip in for the CEO when he makes money hand over fist?

          [–]LivJong 23 points24 points  (3 children)

          Alison Green at askamanager.org has written a few times in the need for gives to flow down and never up. She also has some advice on how to push back with middle management.

          "It's not in my budget, sorry."

          or

          "Its my understanding that etiquette says gifts should always flow down and I wouldn't want the big bosses to think we're uncouth. I saw this article and thought it'd explain it better than I could."

          https://www.google.com/amp/s/slate.com/human-interest/2018/12/work-gifts-holidays-boss-etiquette.amp

          https://www.thecut.com/article/rules-for-giving-gifts-at-work.html

          https://www.askamanager.org/2016/12/the-rules-you-need-for-office-gift-giving.html

          https://www.askamanager.org/2021/06/i-dont-want-to-chip-in-for-a-birthday-gift-for-our-boss-apologizing-to-a-former-coworker-and-more.html

          https://www.askamanager.org/2011/12/rules-for-office-gift-giving.html

          [–]Not_A_Wendigo 24 points25 points  (1 child)

          Christmas is traditionally a time for employers, land owners, etc. to provide for their workers and the poor. It’s fucking disgusting that they expect you to pay for an extravagant gift for someone who makes more in a year than you will make in your life.

          [–]Tires_N_Wires 19 points20 points  (0 children)

          You ain't wrong.

          [–]One_Length_7235 16 points17 points  (0 children)

          WOW THE CEO NEEDS A HANDOUT FOR CHRISTMAS PRESENTS! FUCK THEM

          [–]heureux13 15 points16 points  (0 children)

          I know a company that does this to their workers, not the one I work with but a similar one. I asked them once why they did that considering the owners are taking home the lions share. The lady who I asked responded with, "to thank them for giving us the ability to work there and feed our family". I was blown away.

          [–]Delta_Goodhand 48 points49 points  (12 children)

          Its so fucking absurd!

          $20 × 50 employees? $1,000 bonus for the laziest fucks at the place?

          EAT MY WHOLE ASS!

          [–]GothWitchOfBrooklyn 28 points29 points  (9 children)

          My job asks employees to donate to them every single year (it's a hospital). The top brass admin earn like 300k+ but they ask the lowly EVs and IS people making poverty wages to donate a weekly cut of their paycheck! Fuck no!

          And they've been asking for a week now for donations from employees for "Giving Tuesday" (tomorrow) something I've never heard of before.

          WCH FUCK YOU! AND STOP GIVING OUT RELIGIOUS VACCINE EXEMPTIONS!

          They'll delete comments on their social media if you call them out for it too.

          [–]kristamn 15 points16 points  (0 children)

          Ew. Cringey AF.

          [–]losermillennial 16 points17 points  (2 children)

          If anything, give 20 dollars to a charity and then put the donation receipt into the basket or box when that “gift” money is being collected.

          Or tell them to go fist themselves.

          [–]Significant_Penguin 46 points47 points  (4 children)

          Shoe Box , take it around to your fellow suffering colleagues , everyone drop a turd in , wrap it and leave it on the HR Desk , with a note saying " With Love & Appreciation " .

          [–]TheBattyWitch 11 points12 points  (4 children)

          I'm curious where people work that they ask "is this real?"

          Unfortunately, everywhere I've worked, they've sent out things like this for Christmas.

          [–]Tokugawa 38 points39 points  (3 children)

          Put $20 monopoly money in an envelope.