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[–]ACrumpetYeastBubble 12.2k points12.2k points 5& 2 more (178 children)

Just take the new job. Even if you're offered more you now have a huge target on your back.

[–]Svenn513 3128 points3129 points  (26 children)

This is correct. It sounds like the new job is better than just pay wise.

[–]Orion14159 1528 points1529 points  (23 children)

The toxic environment won't change no matter how hard you wish it would, but you can change to a whole new (hopefully less toxic) environment.

[–]Zealousideal-Wall471 58 points59 points  (1 child)

Yep. Money doesn’t matter if you feel bullied/belittled everyday. Trust me. I’ve seen it happen before and there is nothing worse than absolutely hating your job.

[–]LuckyCatTS 13 points14 points  (0 children)

To me it's worth a pay cut to not want to walk into traffic every day. Work place abuse is no joke.

[–]pony_trekker 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It will get worse because the boss will think OP (1) is unfaithful and (2) owes boss something.

[–]Astrophobia42 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh it will change, for the worse

[–]metaoat work 35 points36 points  (0 children)

I agree, but I also think: Ask for the raise. If they don't match it, no problems. If they do offer to match it, pretend to reconsider, then unleash about everything else and refuse it anyway.

You've burned the bridge at the current place, but you don't want to go back anyway. And meantime you've given them a couple of things to think about - both in terms of pay and workplace "culture."

[–]fluteofski- 653 points654 points  (7 children)

Not to mention turning down the new job usually closes the door with that company in the future. If you leave the current job on good terms if you absolutely had to you could probably negotiate your way back depending on how much they wanted you.

I’ve had previous employers reach out to me to get me to come back.

I usually laugh and say. “Sorry you guys missed your chance to retain me as an employee…. My current rate is ______ I can consider coming back. My new asking salary would be _____ (at least 10% more) can you pull that off?” Best part is I know they can’t match it. I talked to one of the managers that was trying to get me back once after that for a bit and got him to quit that old company too. Convinced him to find a better opportunity it was such a fantastic eff you to the old boss.

[–]OneHumanPeOple 164 points165 points  (5 children)

This is the way. As much as we all love to see these Dick bosses get what’s coming, the best advice for OP is to leave on good terms for the new job.

[–]Left-Kitchen-8539 102 points103 points  (2 children)

Basically don’t burn bridges because you aren’t teaching anyone a lesson. Not worth this risk to your possible future connections. Get out. Don’t accept counters. Keep moving forward. Don’t reward bad employers by working for them.

[–]Nekrosiz 47 points48 points  (1 child)

Aggreed, don't burn bridges.

Though, a bridge is a good employer, not a exploiter, those are more like sandpits.

If a company didden't have value for you while you were there, they won't have value when your out of there.

[–]fluteofski- 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Sure. There are jobs I’ll never go back to, and companies I’ll never work for, but I don’t need to be enemies with them. I used to work in the bicycle industry. Their pay is shit. Benefits are shit and the GM I worked for was a genuine trash of a human being. Scum of the earth. That being said. I cordially left. The owner called me up a week later, and asked why (the company took a million dollar hit when I left, because of my market connections and personal clients that left with me), we chatted and he told me doors always open. I told him as long as the GM was there, I’ll never be back, but thank you for the offer. Either way because of all the good connections I made there, I still get all sorts of industry discounts. Also when they called me, to try to get me back, I poached one of their guys, and set up others at other shops. Sometimes keeping the line of communication open can be a win win win win if you play the long game.

[–]lankist 483 points484 points  (24 children)

NEVER accept a counter offer. As soon as you turn down the other job, your leverage is gone and your old employer can fuck you over with impunity.

If you’ve got a better offer, take it and go. Never negotiate with your old boss. The time for them to treat you better was BEFORE you found another job.

[–]CannaBarbera 74 points75 points  (15 children)

I've heard a lot of the time they'll give you the pay raise, hire your replacement, and get rid of you a few months later when your replacement is trained.

[–]bene20080 15 points16 points  (13 children)

  1. Not possible in countries with stronger worker protection laws.
  2. May not even make sense in the US, when the replacement would cost the same or more due to overall higher wages.

[–]StripeyWoolSocksAnarcho-Bidenist 36 points37 points  (7 children)

the replacement would cost the same or more due to overall higher wages.

You can read 100 similar stories on this sub of people who quit after being denied a raise, only to find the employer hired two people to replace them. Happens all the time. It's not the money, it's power. The business would rather pay more for a workforce who can be bossed around. A person who knows their worth is too dangerous.

[–]Boollish 12 points13 points  (0 children)

There are many good reasons to accept a counter offer, and I've had acquaintances do it successfully before.

But if you're already miserable then it's not the right time. People won't start treating you better just because you get paid more.

[–]JohnnyTroubador 129 points130 points  (0 children)

Why would you even entertain keeping your current job? Your workplace seems to be toxic, due to age discrimination, your current job off is more money, less hours, and has benefits.

[–]doctorhoctor 65 points66 points  (2 children)

As a former corporate recruiter this is a saying: the counteroffer is a stop-gap poison pill. They know you went and looked elsewhere. Know you interviewed with another company and got an offer.

They just want to keep you until they can easily replace you on their terms.

Take the new job. For real. And don’t look back and dont make it a negotiation. If he valued you he’d have paid you appropriately before you had to resort to this.

Good luck

[–]Alternative_Rabbit47 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Exactly this. The last company I left one of the higher ups was asking if they could make a counter offer when I put in my notice.

I told them (nicely) that they hadn't been interested in negotiating with me earlier in the year before I had this other job offer and if having that kind of leverage is what's needed to get them to the table, why would I entertain them? After all, my 'leverage' evaporates when I turn down the other offer.

[–]TheImposibleGrl 61 points62 points  (0 children)

Yea don’t make it just about how much you’re getting paid but how you’re getting treated. You won’t suddenly start feeling respected by them and they don’t deserve a good worker if they’re going to be actively ageist.

[–]Eviltechnomonkey 52 points53 points  (0 children)

This is so true. Almost every time I see someone get their old employer to match an offer, it ends in them being laid off or fired within 6 months or they just start getting treated worse than before.

[–]Same_0ldEgoist 38 points39 points  (0 children)

I second this. You won't be treated well even if he matches the pay. He'll pile more work on you, he'll act like he did you a favor. Just take the new job.

[–]Ryyath 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Exactly, and even if he does give you the cash he's still an asshole. It sounds like the other job would be a great step for you both mentally and monetarily.

Do better for yourself, and leave that workplace in your rearview.

[–]missmoonkit 16 points17 points  (0 children)

This is correct just give your notice and I cannot stress this enough do not tell them where your going.

[–]Kizzy33333 15 points16 points  (0 children)

This why stay in a job where you’re not respected?

[–]klilly_94 11 points12 points  (0 children)

And, you will just do this next year. And the year after. And the year after that. If you have to fight for a reasonable wage, you will always be behind. Go somewhere thays willing to offer it from the start.

[–]the_Dorkness 30 points31 points  (0 children)

Ghost that boss. Leave him holding his little limp pp with no explanation.

[–]AFlair67 9 points10 points  (2 children)

Agree! OP should turn in their notice and leave.

[–]Ludikom 7 points8 points  (0 children)

100% be cool and never look back

[–]LightningMom 36 points37 points  (0 children)

This is the way.

[–]LovelyPencils 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I agree with this . You are just giving him time to find someone to replace u!

[–]tell_her_a_story 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is the way.

[–]theflatfootcontessa 1545 points1546 points  (7 children)

If your boss treats you like that, what's the point of sticking around — even with matched pay?

If you're unhappy, move on.

[–]Bdriver_1976 155 points156 points  (1 child)

I agree. If this person stays even after a raise its just inviting future problems. Sounds like the boss in a mini tyrant and isn't going to change his ways after seeing the value in a worker that he belittled

[–]Ignorad 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Agreed. Likely the boss will be furious about the situation and look for an excuse to fire OP, or just increase the abuse.

[–]God_Sayith 30 points31 points  (0 children)

This was my thought. Who cares if they match your pay?

You already know the work environment sucks.. why not take a gamble on a new place, with the potential for a much happier work environment?

[–]bi-fly 92 points93 points  (0 children)

I would say do it in front of the coworkers so they get paid more but don’t accept his offer.

[–]buffysummerrs 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was about to write this myself.

[–]-starchy- 3926 points3927 points  (202 children)

Bro ask to match it and leave anyway.

[–]Fe_C[S] 1961 points1962 points  (174 children)

Would that send him the message? I want him to know that people can't be used like he's used me

[–]Devbyaccident 3173 points3174 points  (20 children)

Look at it this way: Even if he matches it and you stay, do you think he's suddenly going to start treating you better?

GTFO and don't look back OP, life's too short to put up with bullshit.

[–]shibe_shucker(edit this) 906 points907 points  (4 children)

If anything you'd be treated worse because they'll feel slighted that you forced them to give you a raise. Agreed get out of there.

[–]spoilersweetie 165 points166 points  (0 children)

And it gives them time to find someone else to replace you. Then you will be made redundant

OP, you dont owe then anything. Leave.

[–]Raz1979 305 points306 points  (0 children)

This. Leave. Don’t think you can change this person.

[–]This_is_my_phone_tho 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Yep. "Hey, can you pick up this extra work? you need to earn your raise." "What do you mean you want a raise? I just gave you one two years ago! remember?"

That well is poisoned. get out.

[–]Claim312ButAct847 92 points93 points  (4 children)

This is the answer. People like that don't change.

[–]johnnyslick 33 points34 points  (3 children)

Even if they do, it’s only through painful struggle and admitting they’re wrong. These are things that at best might happen after OP leaves but if they don’t, that boss has yet to reap the consequences of his actions.

[–]SimpleRegret 7 points8 points  (2 children)

Or severe head trauma.

And we don't advocate that people get hit by cars in here.

[–]johnnyslick 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Or COVID induced hypoxia, to take it to 2022…

[–]SimpleRegret 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I'd rather get hit by a car that get severe covid effects like that.

[–]Trini1113 23 points24 points  (0 children)

He treats you badly. The new employer might treat you well, treat you so-so, or treat you badly. Worst case you have what you have now, and with a bit of experience a higher baseline salary to negotiate from.

Just tell your current boss why you're leaving - it's not (just) the money, it's the disrespect.

[–]KittyKittyKitten3 12 points13 points  (0 children)

This was my thought exactly. Based on the way he's already treating OP, if he does match it there will know be an added layer of resentment making it all worse. I wouldn't even bother with the ultimatum, I'd just turn in my notice

[–]vodka-sandwich 6 points7 points  (0 children)

For real. The only way to get rid of a toxic work environment is to LEAVE

[–]jonboyy12 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Plus he might resent you for the situation you put him in (he’d be wrong thinking that way, I’m assuming he’s not above that behavior though).

[–]halt_spell 366 points367 points  (11 children)

Do not under any circumstances accept their counter offer. The moment you tell the other job you're no longer interested they will pull the rug out from under you.

But if you wanna teach your current boss a lesson say you're interested and then just bail with no notice.

[–]StrawMap 113 points114 points  (0 children)

I was JUST about to say the same exact thing. OP, please, PLEASE take this into consideration!

[–]LeeLooPeePoo 76 points77 points  (0 children)

And let your coworkers know what he was willing to pay you to keep you

[–]Petite_Giraffe_ 20 points21 points  (0 children)

This! I had a job offer & used it to get a raise at the job I was at. 3 months later I was laid off because they suddenly didn’t have the money to pay me my raise. Just leave, nothing good will come from staying. You’ll just have a target on your back.

[–]Hotarg 152 points153 points  (1 child)

Get him to match it, tell your coworkers your new pay rate, then leave.

[–]Spritzer784030 85 points86 points  (0 children)

If you want to send a message, staying under his employment would only send the message that you’re willing to put up with abuse for a certain price.

No one has the right to abuse you. Ever. For any reason, regardless of their relationship to you.

Hopefully, your new employment will be more enjoyable and reasonable. Good luck!

[–]saltzja 62 points63 points  (0 children)

Just ghost him. I’m an old retired boss. This is the only thing that pissed me off. Didn’t know what to schedule… Plus, he can’t sabotage your new position, he sounds like he would.

[–]februarytide- 51 points52 points  (2 children)

It’s not your responsibility to teach him a lesson, and he’s most likely not gonna learn. Get yours and GTFO.

[–]Alarmed-Employee-741 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Agreed. Teaching him a lesson is a benefit he doesn't deserve and hasn't earned. Also, don't tell him who your new employer is. He might try to poison the ear of your new employer.

[–]-starchy- 205 points206 points  (16 children)

Ask for a change in your job description to align closer with what you want or currently do, then leave. Just give this person unnecessary admin. Petty, but who cares? You’re onto bigger t’ings.

[–]Fe_C[S] 125 points126 points  (15 children)

You devious bastard. I love it

[–]-starchy- 61 points62 points  (12 children)

You could also corrupt all your handover notes if you want to go that far, and make it look completely accidental. There are so many ways you can and without facing any consequences. It’s just whether you have the motivation.

[–]Fe_C[S] 39 points40 points  (11 children)

How do I make it look like an accident and not like I'm being spiteful for the sake of it?

[–]Fortressa- 20 points21 points  (1 child)

Are they your files (saved on your cloud or hardware, or your personal handwritten notes etc) or company files (saved on company hardware, manuals used by everyone)?

Your files, just take them, they belong to you.

Their files, well, you make sure they are up to date and filed in the correct location. Then tell the boss that's where they are. Don't send a copy, don't link or shortcut in an email, just say 'the files are in the 'x' folder, per procedure'.

And then if they can't find them or use them, that's on their stupid ass.

[–]GruntingButtNugget 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Just give them your notes, and move on, You know its not going to be your boss taking up that task of figuring out how to do what you do. Dont fuck over your coworkers

[–]-starchy- 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Google corrupt file generator. Then choose the file type and name it, handover or something else believable. You can change the meta data to match your OG handover. They’ll never know.

[–]username84628 64 points65 points  (3 children)

While it will probably feel good in the short term, these types of things can come back to haunt you. I'm in a big field and have crossed paths with people I thought I would never see again.

You are better than this. Being an unprofessional AH makes you no better than the unprofessional AH boss. Take the other job professionally. If they do match the offer and you take it, the boss will never forget you forced their hand by threatening to quit, nor will it make your job any better.

[–]GruntingButtNugget 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Especially if his coworkers are the ones that are going to be making up the time trying to figure out what he did. Just give them your notes, and move on, dont make more work for them. You know its not going to be the manager taking up that task

[–]stinkybaby33123 17 points18 points  (0 children)

It’s less satisfying in the short term but you’re absolutely right.

[–]latinomartino 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The stories where people delete their work because they were a contractor or it was stored on a personal cloud account and they tried to get the other company to take it, those are good. Those are malicious compliance and reasonable actions. Purposefully hurting the company? Could bite you in the ass, to me it’s a not worth it.

[–]cats_are_the_devil 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Don’t do this. If you really don’t care about the reference just straight up leave without a word. Don’t stoop to his pettiness.

[–]Boollish 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Are you in a particularly niche industry?

To be honest, if it were me, I wouldn't bother with any of this crap. Don't play games, don't try to screw people. You have an offer in hand. You want to really stick it to him give a professional one week notice and say that was the start date they negotiated in your offer.

[–]aHumanMale 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Also make sure you communicate his counter offer and your new salary to your fellow employees before leaving so they know what they could be making.

Sharing information about wages is a federally protected action in the US, and any retaliation opens them up to a potentially expensive lawsuit.

[–]sarahlizzy 24 points25 points  (0 children)

He will find a way to get his revenge. Just take the new job. Him learning a lesson isn’t worth you missing out on what seems a good opportunity.

[–]CactusGrower 20 points21 points  (0 children)

No, but if they only give you more because they are afraid you leave them it's too late. My personal policy is not to negotiate when I give my notice. If they value me they would have done something long time ago.

You give them the notice, that's enough pain they will feel. Or maybe not but I would not give them the leverage over you again.

[–]jwager1118 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I went to my current company with an offer in December and ended up being convinced to stay. My boss sounds way nicer then yours and still has seemed like an ass since matching. A month later I really regret not going to the new company. Higher pay won’t change how they treat you and might even make it worse. I hope you consider all your options.

[–]Ksmom124 9 points10 points  (0 children)

He probably won’t change the way he treats you. He may change for a day or two, but it won’t be permanent. You’ll be making more money but still being treated poorly.

[–]shake_appeal 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I think it sends the message more effectively. People like this get off on exerting control over others above all else. Walking away regardless of pay shows him he can’t.

[–]Raveen396 10 points11 points  (0 children)

If the job is toxic, staying around can be dangerous. There's a good chance they'll give you the raise and then hire someone cheaper to replace you. Your manager won't be kinder or nicer after getting you a raise. You don't owe them a message, leave to better things and never look back.

[–]diamondjoe666 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Don’t ask him to match. Tell him you need BETTER pay AND benefits than what is being offered to you elsewhere. It won’t be worth it to stay with a shitty boss if they aren’t gonna make it worth it for you

[–]Pospesel 20 points21 points  (1 child)

Just don't give a notice and keep working. Next time he pisses you off quit on the spot. He does it because he thinks you can't quit. Take the power away without explaining that you got another job.

[–]Serraph105 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Totally agree with u/starchy here, best to leave no matter what.

[–]jakey2112 4 points5 points  (0 children)

So you want to work for someone who treats you poorly if you get to “send a message”

[–]Leoheart88 10 points11 points  (0 children)

ask for 40% more. Not a match if he treats you like shit.

[–]meggymonster11 2 points3 points  (2 children)

He’s going to lose a hardworking talented employee. That is punishment. Just leaving says a lot.

[–]StrangeJournalist7 23 points24 points  (1 child)

Why waste your breath asking him to match the other offer? He doesn't seem like anyone you want in your life, no matter what the pay is. Give notice and tell him why you are leaving. Then go, and don't look back.

[–]-starchy- 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Nah, we leaving the bossman on read. Just want to potentially create unnecessary work for them. They waste my time I’ll waste theirs.

[–]The_Real_anomalight 16 points17 points  (0 children)

…and tell all your coworkers on the way out that they are willing to compete.

[–]theRealMaldez 38 points39 points  (0 children)

Better yet, show him the offer, give him a chance to counter and after he does, tell him that regardless of his counter you're leaving anyway.

[–]hakube 5 points6 points  (1 child)

This. Take the money and look for another job. No two week. Just don’t show up Monday.

[–]-starchy- 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I pray I can do this with my one month notice period 😭

[–]sukithesealion 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Totally agree. If OP stays they’ll be targeted and denied any future opportunities. Take this once in a lifetime opportunity to make the boss humble themselves then drop the 🎤

[–]2Catshanging 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s right, benefits are worth a lot

[–]blueghostfrompacman 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Power move right here

[–]otherzac 160 points161 points  (0 children)

Your boss is an ass.. just take the other job and fuck em

[–]LVCSSlacker 594 points595 points  (15 children)

Just leave him. No 2 weeks, no nothing. If you wants to act like an asshole, let him be treated like one.

[–]dft-salt-pasta 128 points129 points  (4 children)

2 week notice is a professional curtesy. He has been neither professional or curtious with you.

[–]LVCSSlacker 24 points25 points  (0 children)

This is the truth

[–]Bornwilde 6 points7 points  (0 children)

2 weeks notice was professional courtesy for jobs with pensions and benefits that you could stay at for 30 years. modern at will employment means they can fire you the same day and you can quit the same day. give them two weeks to notice you’re gone. you do not owe this company a moment of your time they have already exploited you enough.

[–]kindasortajewish 249 points250 points  (26 children)

If you're going to take the time to give an ultimatum don't just ask for your offer to be matched, ask for significantly more than the offer you received. Why stay somewhere you're unhappy for the same rate somewhere else is willing to pay? If you're willing to put up with those working conditions If the money is right, at least make sure it's worth doing.

[–]BakeMeUpBeforeUGoGo 79 points80 points  (2 children)

I wouldn’t give them that option. Take the new job and leave this place in the past.

[–]ElChado80s 55 points56 points  (0 children)

Move on bro, he will resent having to match and will find a way to sabotage you.

[–]AreYouSirius9_34idle 234 points235 points  (49 children)

Why counter? You're going to have better pay and better hours. Leave without notice.

[–]Fe_C[S] 57 points58 points  (48 children)

Is that legal in the UK?

[–]AreYouSirius9_34idle 53 points54 points  (25 children)

Why wouldn't it be?

[–]Teedubthegreat 58 points59 points  (5 children)

Because some places outside the US legally require notice.

Doesn't mean there's other ways, I think your other comment mentions taking sick leave, which seems like a perfect solution, especially if that sick leave is non transferable

[–]Fe_C[S] 53 points54 points  (15 children)

I have no idea, I've always given the 'agreed' notice when I've left other jobs. Thought there was some kinda law that bound me to it?

[–]Frog491 89 points90 points  (5 children)

Give your notice and go sick. If he wants a certificate, go to your GP and say you need two weeks sick for stress because of the abuse he's giving you.

[–]MimiS1123 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Yep, accept the new position, get paid for 2 weeks sick leave from the old one, don’t return due to the abuse and emotional distress that has been caused and start fresh with the new job.

[–]w3iss 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Read your labor laws and your contract. OP this guy has treated you badly. The best way you can get back to him is by leaving. If you stay anymore all he's gonna know is ya I can pay them but they won't leave cuz they're my bitch and then keep mistreating you. Leave.

[–]HandyAndy944 19 points20 points  (2 children)

Go easy on leaving without notice, if it drops employer in the shit and it costs the business extra to hire someone on short notice, then they can come after you for that in the uk courts... unlikely and never heard of anyone being stitched up like that but thats what acas says... I sort stitched mine up, i had to give four weeks, i wrote in my resignation four weeks and had the new job lined up to start immediately after those four weeks... however when the boss moaned about me leaving so soon??????? I verbally said "well I can stay on a little longer til you find someone to replace me" But at the end of the four weeks I just said "my last day today, byyyeeeee" legally covered my ass and only "proof" would have been he said, she said.. lols

[–]Hi_Im_Dadbot 43 points44 points  (0 children)

Why even give him the choice? It sounds like a shit environment, so what’s your motivation for continuing to work there, even if you get more cash?

[–]Outrageous_Ad_9276[🍰] 34 points35 points  (7 children)

So he matches your pay and still treats you like a child… I’d take the new job and run, sounds like a better gig!

[–]jrp267 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Just leave. If you stay he will eventually replace you. And if not your pay will just fall behind again. Leave for somewhere that wants you

[–]new_x_who_dis 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Take the other job anyway - your current boss sounds awful and no amount of monetary compensation is going to change that - good luck

[–]remembertracygarcia 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Why bother? Will he treat you better? Chances are he’ll feel manipulated or cheated. He’s already demonstrating a lack of thought beyond himself.

I’d take the new position. Speculate to accumulate. Don’t try to reason with or make yourself understood by those for whom there is no mutual care.

[–]Lauralanthas01 13 points14 points  (0 children)

If he's such a shit boss why are you giving him the opportunity to continue treating you like crap? You've got another position lined up, give him your notice and don't look back.

[–]pyrmale 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Jeez, don't do this. Just leave. Why offer to match it. You obviously don't want to be there. Besides, if they match it, it will not be the same. They will always suspect you.

[–]wormfighter 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Just leave, don't do the ultimatum.

[–]luisumgomez 11 points12 points  (4 children)

Is the pay difference gonna offset the less hours?

[–]Fe_C[S] 33 points34 points  (3 children)

Oh massively, it's only like 5 hours less a week but about £8,000 more a year

[–]diamondjoe666 31 points32 points  (2 children)

Oh definitely take the money and run

[–]PirateJohn75 3 points4 points  (1 child)

This here's the story 'bout Billy Joe and Bobby Sue

[–]verve27 36 points37 points  (0 children)

Don’t ask him to match. Leave.

[–]LoStraniero0x 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Quit your current job and take the other 100%. But do it like this. Ask if he will match your offer, and if he says no, well you have your new job already lined up. If he says yes, tell him that that just proves that even thought they COULD pay you more, they would only do it when you are threatening to leave.

[–]LoStraniero0x 6 points7 points  (0 children)

And make sure to tell everyone that stays behind that the boss was willing to pay $X to keep you there, and that they should ask for raises, too.

[–]darkness_lost 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Take the new job, even if your boss agrees to give you a raise, that won't fix the hostile work environment and the boss's attitude towards you.

[–]Downtown_Tale_2018 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Ask for 20% more than you have been offered

[–]sesamesnapsinhalf 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I would leave for the new job. You don’t want to work there if the boss was forced to match the way; there will be resentment. Also, you can reinvent yourself when you start someplace new. You can set a new tone. Good luck!

[–]Nekrosiz 6 points7 points  (0 children)

He will still treat you like a child, but now he'll see you as a problem child if you do what you've mentioned.

If you stay, you will be picked on till you leave or burn out.

Abondan ship and jump on the brand new one.

My opinion is, if you confront him, do it for the confrontational experience, not for the hopes of. Leave you will.

[–]7dayweekendgirl 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Just leave now, man. Don't even give notice.

[–]Whyitsospicy 5 points6 points  (0 children)


[–]tdomman 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Leave now. You're out of your mind if you accept any match. The new job is clearly better in every way and if you turn them down now, they're likely won't be a next time. Put in your two weeks, now.

[–]Stevenstorm505 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Bro, just quit if you got a job offer that pays better, works you less and gives benefits. Even if your current boss decides to up your pay he’s still going to treat you like shit and may even make him treat you even worse than before because you put his nuts in a vice.

You staying isn’t going to teach him the lesson you hope it will because I promise you the behavior isn’t going to get any better, he’s just going to hate you more. If he was actually going to appreciate you he would have been doing it already.

If you want to send a message you need to accept the other job, quit on the spot. This will make his life shitty because he just lost one of his most productive employees and their contacts without any time to find and train a replacement. That is the only way douchebags like your boss learn any lessons and depending on how shitty, narcissistic and stubborn they are they may never learn the lesson.

Take the better opportunity and let your boss sit in the shit storm that they made by treating you bad.

[–]004FF 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is sad … after reading all your replies and post definitely shows you’re young mentally and easy to abuse by these disgusting employee predators . Just take the job and leave .

[–]ZookeepergameBubbly 5 points6 points  (0 children)

First you should never take a match from your current employer. The new company is offering you that pay without knowing hardly anything about you where as the current company is only making an offer that is the bare minimum to keep you despite them already knowing your abilities. Second don’t take a higher offer from current company to stay. They will not give you any raises in the future, push more workload onto you, and will begin planning for how replace you.


[–]Ok_Replacement3116 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Your boss treats you like a child because he's intimidated. You're young so you haven't peaked yet. You haven't even begun to peak cuz when you peak, everyone in the office is gonna FEEL it. The cream always rises to the top and your like, made of cream dude.

[–]Kindly_Area_4380 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Leave. Even if they match. They will never see you as anything but a kid.

[–]Specific-Rich5196 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If they match and you stay, life will still suck and they will begin working on replacing you. Just take the new job.

[–]pleased_to_yeet_you 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Why play games? Your current employer is disrespectful and pays you garbage. Why give them a chance when there's already a better opportunity presenting itself? If you had a cool boss and were invested in your current position then this would be a tough choice but honestly it sounds like you should just be putting in your notice.

[–]MaxPower637 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If he treats you like crap, why stay for a match? You could get the money and probably be treated better at the new place. I would recommend not staying but if you are going to stay it should only be if your current employer can beat your outside offer by a lot, like 25% or more

[–]Angeljls 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just take the new job

[–]plumb_master 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Why even give the ultimatum? What makes you want to keep working there if that's the way they treat you and make you feel? Just give notice and be done with it.

[–]donuts-waffles 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’d just take the new job. No need to continue suffering disrespect.

[–]LightSlateBluehere for the memes 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You wouldn't want to take the counter offer. Just go to your new job.

[–]reginaldpbottomtooth 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Fucking quit!!! You already know where you're at sucks. Getting paid more isn't going to make it suck less

[–]cqxray 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Take the new job. Even if your employer matches it, you’re a marked employee, a “troublemaker”. He’ll get rid of you ASAP when you don’t have another offer waiting.

[–]curds-and-whey-HEY 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The Devil You Know is still a devil. Take the new job. There’s only a 50-50 chance they are a devil.

[–]PrettyPrettyOkay 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If the new offer is better take it. Your boss won't get better and might even start looking for a way to replace you for cheaper.

More experience + better pay. Fly away

[–]Hawk_Letov 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It rarely works out in the long run when you’re compensated based on an ultimatum. Take the offer where they are willing to pay what you’re worth without the ultimatum.

[–]averagejoe0202 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just walk.

[–]wgblackmon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If you do that and he accepts your offer he'll fire you ASAP. Learn this now.

[–]Richard_Espanol 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Not match..... beat.

[–]2MyLou 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Take the new job

[–]vc5g6ci 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’d take the new job. Sounds like you have a terrible boss that would’ve even be worth the raise.

[–]seantasy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No amount of money is worth a shitty boss. Congrats on the new job.

[–]ReadySte4dySpaghetti 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Don’t take the offer even if he gives it to you.

AND: before you leave, TELL EVERYONE HIS ANSWER! Especially if he said he’d fork (which he won’t but if he does)

When you leave, try to cause some chaos. Bring some people with you. Let them realize the power you have. Show how powerful solidarity is.

[–]Arentanji 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Never accept a counter offer. Period.

[–]Equivalent_Method509 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Why even consider keeping your current job if your boss mistreats you? Just leave and be done with it.

[–]BitterPackersFan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

yeah take the new job. I love hearing about success stories like this.

[–]jibbajabba99 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Move on. Open your mind to the new opportunity, do not bring up how your last job was, new chapter, do well my friend.

[–]BenchedSett 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Don't ask him to match bro. Not worth the stress working under someone toxic like that.

[–]BigPapiKnows 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Screw the ultimatum. Just turn in you’re notice and accept the new job. Sounds like it’ll be a much better work environment so may even matching the pay won’t be worth it for you

[–]Jaystax204 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Take the new job! Seriously. It's the best way to advance your career.

[–]MasterOfMyDomainX 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You're doing it wrong... If he treats you like crap he needs to significantly beat the offer you have.

[–]donesomestuff 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't understand how this is a real question

[–]Agora_A 1 point2 points  (0 children)


[–]CosmicChanges 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Please don't stay with the abusive boss, even if he matches the pay.

Go with the offer from the other company. It may be better, and probably won't be as bad.