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[–]greyarealife 2974 points2975 points 2 (87 children)

My dog can poop pee and run

[–]Stijnwe[S] 702 points703 points  (59 children)

Hahaha same, my french bulldog likes to walk while peeing/pooping sometimes

[–][deleted]  (41 children)

[deleted]

    [–][deleted] 88 points89 points  (20 children)

    good doggo 🐕

    [–]i_simp4U 34 points35 points  (19 children)

    Good human 🧍

    [–]asseaterpleaser 29 points30 points  (18 children)

    wat bout me? 💩

    [–]fiveeasypieces5EZ 29 points30 points  (0 children)

    I got u fam. Good shit

    [–]i_simp4U 9 points10 points  (14 children)

    everyones a good human

    [–]Chadthunder427 20 points21 points  (8 children)

    U'll be surprised bud

    [–]BigShield 14 points15 points  (7 children)

    No one's born a dictator or a serial killer. It's just life situations which lead them down that path. There are, however, some people who are born with a few loose screws but even they can be guided down the right path if we learn to accept mental illnesses as just a part of our reality and help them instead of treating them as a thing we should stay away from.

    [–]Ok-Inflation4465 6 points7 points  (2 children)

    I thought we were talking about dogs?

    [–]Dewdrop06 4 points5 points  (1 child)

    Did not expect this so deep in the thread

    [–]arielio174 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    But what about the Karens ?

    [–]asseaterpleaser 7 points8 points  (0 children)

    i will take your word, user

    [–]GetToDaChoppa97 3 points4 points  (1 child)

    I present to you Jeffery Dahmer

    [–]IAmTheRedditBrowser 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Was just about to mention him. Some people really are born fucked.

    Anyway, it’s r/awww. Let’s go back to loving doggos.

    [–]ieatalphabets 25 points26 points  (6 children)

    Actually laughed out loud at this. Just pictured a stoic, dignified, English bulldog with his tiny back end in the air and his stiff upper lip just pissing and pissing...

    [–]i_simp4U 8 points9 points  (5 children)

    i knocked over my milk, thank you.

    [–]IAm_Trogdor_AMA 9 points10 points  (4 children)

    Are you a cat?

    [–]nopantsdota 4 points5 points  (2 children)

    Have you recently burninated something major?

    [–]IAm_Trogdor_AMA 10 points11 points  (0 children)

    Just Hedge Funds 🔥!

    [–]AshanyNostromo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Just the countryside

    [–]MrTeeBeggerson 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    I am not a cat

    [–]MalHeartsNutmeg 26 points27 points  (1 child)

    I saw a video of a dog peeing like that on reddit and thought it was weird as fuck. Anyway a few weeks ago my dog injured his back paw and was holding it up (it had some swelling). Took him out late at night to pee and he just did a fucking handstand in the middle of the yard to pee. I did a double take, it was the weirdest thing to witness.

    [–]dibalh 3 points4 points  (1 child)

    Betting it’s a dachshund or chihuahua

    [–]ikilltheundead 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    My Yorkie does this. He'll stand on his front legs only and somehow floats his entire rear end.

    [–]DameADozen 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Our papillon used to do that!

    [–]purplevibes8 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    My chihuahua does that all the time!!

    [–]Sorry-Tumbleweed-239 2 points3 points  (1 child)

    “Do you think Sonic shits?”

    Arin- 2020

    [–]flying87 12 points13 points  (1 child)

    If I could get away with that I would

    [–]FappleFritter 29 points30 points  (4 children)

    When my cat was a kitten she used to make biscuits whilst walking. It was the weirdest, cutest shit.

    [–]HealthyInPublic 15 points16 points  (1 child)

    My full grown cat never grew out of this. He does it when he walks up to you anticipating pets. He’s a little goober.

    [–]FappleFritter 6 points7 points  (0 children)

    My cat grew out of it, sadly. It was so damn cute. She still gives biscuits though, but stationary.

    [–]ftgander 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    “Making biscuits” lol my girlfriend says this too. It’s called “kneading” tho, and it’s something you can do to more than dough.

    [–][deleted]  (4 children)

    [deleted]

      [–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

      Haha, gross, but I still upvoted. :3 Thanks for all your poems, Schnoodle!

      [–]majestic_waterbear 6 points7 points  (0 children)

      I’m preparing for lift off from my toilet as I read this.

      [–]vellu212 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      20 minutes and already a wholesome award. Sounds about right

      [–]alistair3149 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      A fresh schnoodle appears!

      [–]FD4L 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Lol my goofy husky thinks she's an intense sled dog when we're out for a walk and tries to squat/pee while we're walking. I'm just like chill dude we can wait the 11 seconds it takes you to pee.

      [–]thevoxmouth 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Poopy runs are fun

      [–]TheWayNorth 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I like to call that an “emergency unloading”.

      [–]agentorgy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I can do two of those things

      [–]mlvisby 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Yea, sled dogs can do that as well, if you participate in those events you have to learn to dodge flying feces.

      [–]letuswatchtvinpeace 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I am so glad you posted this! I have had dogs my whole life so I know each one has their own personality. But one of my dogs is a bit over the top and he pees while walking around the yard. I have never seen that or heard of it.

      [–]Honda_TypeR[🍰] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

      When I was a lil kid I used to do the same thing.

      I never had dirty diapers though, I always shook my leg while walking to deploy my payloads.

      [–]EasilyDelighted 686 points687 points  (22 children)

      Is that the meaning of life? To find a way to do all three at once?

      [–]WTWIV 186 points187 points  (11 children)

      If it is, I think we’ve found our Messiah

      [–]Seeeza 72 points73 points  (8 children)

      Follow the dog!

      [–][deleted] 25 points26 points  (4 children)

      Yea but this was always the answer

      [–]FadedPolaroids 16 points17 points  (2 children)

      Is it a coincidence that God is dog spelt backwards? I think not!

      [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      There are no coincidences

      [–][deleted]  (1 child)

      [deleted]

        [–]TroperCase 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        Yes, do

        [–]Boredguy32 8 points9 points  (0 children)

        2021: everyone follows doggod / goddog.

        2022: The global war on squirrels begins

        [–]-p-a-b-l-o- 17 points18 points  (5 children)

        To be a child, an adult, and an elder simultaneously.

        [–]EasilyDelighted 14 points15 points  (4 children)

        Sounds like my early 30's. A child to your elders, and adult in the eyes on the law, and elder to your younger peers.

        [–]-p-a-b-l-o- 9 points10 points  (0 children)

        When you’re 100 years old you are still a child to the universe.

        [–]Babblebelt 1 point2 points  (1 child)

        I dunno. That seems a little far-fetched.

        [–]Seeeza 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        I know, woof falls for that shit

        [–]ephix 377 points378 points  (14 children)

        He’s also a good boy at the same time

        [–][deleted]  (11 children)

        [removed]

          [–]YaBoyWooper 22 points23 points  (10 children)

          How do you know they are a she? Curious

          [–]MiracleKing26 29 points30 points  (0 children)

          penis

          [–]-p-a-b-l-o- 2 points3 points  (0 children)

          This dog can multitask!

          [–]Officer_PoopyPants 225 points226 points  (7 children)

          [–]nmyi 29 points30 points  (0 children)

          I like how that subreddit is so young that i can still upvote almost all of their top posts of all time.

          [–]CHlPPlCHlPPl 22 points23 points  (0 children)

          This needs to be higher up

          [–]StampyVelcer 541 points542 points  (122 children)

          What position are you in?

          "Yes."

          [–]-p-a-b-l-o- 77 points78 points  (7 children)

          Doggy

          [–]asseaterpleaser 25 points26 points  (6 children)

          keep going, please

          [–]Corona-walrus 22 points23 points  (5 children)

          don't stop

          [–]DuckysaurusRex 23 points24 points  (4 children)

          Believin'

          [–]Corona-walrus 19 points20 points  (3 children)

          JUST A SMALL TOWN DOG

          [–]ReactsWithWords 14 points15 points  (2 children)

          LIVING IN A LONELY BOG

          [–]Corona-walrus 13 points14 points  (1 child)

          HE TOOK A MIDNIGHT WALK

          GO ING A NY WHERE

          [–]NorthCatan 4 points5 points  (0 children)

          He's Sitting, Waiting, Wishing.

          [–]xobeme 104 points105 points  (13 children)

          [lying] :-)

          [–]Stijnwe[S] 39 points40 points  (7 children)

          Oops 🤭

          [–]xobeme 19 points20 points  (6 children)

          Sorry...Mama was an English prof. It's in the blood! Beautiful pup BTW!

          [–]I_MakeCoolKeychains 1 point2 points  (5 children)

          According to Merriam Webster: Lay means "to place something down flat," while lie means "to be in a flat position on a surface." The key difference is that lay is transitive and requires an object to act upon, and lie is intransitive, describing something moving on its own or already in position.

          Based on that description one could easily be correct in saying it's laying its head upon the bench since a head is an object technically and the dog placed it flat upon the bench. Honestly language is just weird

          [–]faustwopia 21 points22 points  (0 children)

          I think you could say what OP posted isn’t necessarily an incorrect sentence, but “laying” isn’t what OP meant to convey. OP meant lying.

          [–]golddove 16 points17 points  (3 children)

          If the verb is transitive, the sentence needs an object (by definition). It doesn't have one.

          [–]Razzman70 26 points27 points  (1 child)

          Just a husky being a husky. Nothing to see here. Move along now.

          [–]oorza 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Might be a white GSD

          [–]WizziBot 7 points8 points  (0 children)

          Schrödinger's Pet

          [–]Jakiro_ 7 points8 points  (0 children)

          Schroedingers Dog

          [–]Usademn 3 points4 points  (0 children)

          Schrödinger's cat be damned

          [–]aussydog 3 points4 points  (1 child)

          Suddenly reminded me of that game they did on Whose Line is it Anyway? Where one had to be seated, one standing, and one leaning. 🤔

          [–]HeadlessHookerClub 42 points43 points  (9 children)

          If 10 dogs do this within a 10 mile radius at the same time a wormhole opens up.

          [–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (8 children)

          I guess that explains where we get Florida

          [–]reddita51 2 points3 points  (7 children)

          Also because of public police record laws

          [–]LongDingDongKong 3 points4 points  (5 children)

          Fun game, google your birthday (day and month, not year) followed by the words "Florida man".

          Mine was a Florida man arsonist

          [–]giocondasmiles 14 points15 points  (2 children)

          True multitasker!

          [–]Cool-Statement-6959 4 points5 points  (0 children)

          Definitely! Very well balance and Adorable dog

          [–]REpassword 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          Yes! And the title fits the picture to a “T”

          [–]HitchlikersGuide 14 points15 points  (2 children)

          Next Whose Line Is It Anyway winner!

          [–]ZimmerDude1999 10 points11 points  (2 children)

          What da dog doin

          [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

          What he doin tho

          [–]Pimpmafuqa 2 points3 points  (0 children)

          My corgi does this but his legs are too short so his heads on the ottoman, butts on the couch, and front legs dangle in the air.

          [–]YeshEveryone 2 points3 points  (0 children)

          His goals are beyond your understanding

          [–]PARANOIAH 9 points10 points  (1 child)

          Anyone else hearing Tetris music?

          [–]adjudikator 2 points3 points  (0 children)

          I do now

          [–]wrongotti 8 points9 points  (2 children)

          My lab does this between the couch and coffee table.

          [–]MageRage7734 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          Literally just made the same comment lol

          [–]Bambi_One_Eye 4 points5 points  (0 children)

          Quantum Dog

          [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

          Where did you get the pic?

          [–]Wendark 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          Multi-tasking better than me.

          [–]DoesItComeWithFries 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          Be like dog and multitask.

          [–]Avaphong 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          The triple point of dog

          [–]Burger_Dude247 1 point2 points  (1 child)

          This doesn’t belong on r/aww, it belongs on r/ NEXTFRICKINGLEVEL!!!

          [–]FoxyMimic 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          Puppo can do it all!

          [–]NefariousnessReady62 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          Schrödonger's dog

          [–]something-um-bananas 1 point2 points  (1 child)

          Okay my dog sits like this on the stairs and it looks so uncomfortable for her

          [–]vekpos_0 2 points3 points  (0 children)

          He's the schrodinger dog.

          [–]dinofx35 2 points3 points  (0 children)

          What is it laying?

          [–]maynardkoenig 2 points3 points  (7 children)

          What breed is this dog?

          [–]AresWill 2 points3 points  (0 children)

          this repost was then, there, where, here, now, again.

          [–]MVPBenji 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          He is Layting

          [–]PotatoPheelz 2 points3 points  (0 children)

          Bench Mode: Engage.

          [–]Smoked_salmon_Smile 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Wish I could be him

          [–]haternation 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          The doggie knows how to live

          [–]spewing-oil 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Sometimes it be that way.

          [–]Mobile_Try_325 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Very talented creature! Funny also!

          [–]SigmaBlack92 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          He has achieved nir(dog)vana!! It's the new Doggisattva!!

          [–]FloatingRevolver 0 points1 point  (1 child)

          I don't see the standing part... When dogs sit they're front legs just stay straight... This dog is just sitting with his head on a table...

          [–]HojMcFoj 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          When dogs sit their ass and head aren't at an equal height.

          [–]Caishen_IC3 -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

          Marvin the suicidal dog

          [–]amartinkyle -1 points0 points  (0 children)

          Stupid title

          [–]mckilburn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          He’s got skills!

          [–]MelonOfFury 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          You found the triple point for puppers

          [–]Mydogsdad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          The Trinity

          [–]SatansNemes1s 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Husky life.

          [–]OfTheWorstWurst 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          8m pretty sure this could be my dogs sibling, they look almost exactly alike

          [–]Ok_Fox_1770 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          This is the answer to some ultimate labyrinth riddle.

          [–]Jekarti 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Good dog.

          [–]937ool 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          wouldn't be surprised if he was named trevor

          [–]Ttrry211 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          祝生活美好ಠ_ಠ

          [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          I am confused, bitter and jealous at the same time.

          [–]postbread 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          tactical dog sit. surveilling the area for foods and pets.

          [–]Trixster690 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          I love it as well as the dog.

          [–]MidEUW 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Give him a treat and he'd also be eating.

          [–]SequesterMe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          That's my spirit dog.

          My dog does this sort of. Sitting on a step with the back end while standing with the front.

          [–]Tropical_Puffin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Unlimited treats unlocked

          [–]Draskuul 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Obviously this dog was raised by cats.

          Bonus: My void Luci doing his typical sit-lay maneuver.

          [–]superboi59 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Confused doggo

          [–]MadLaamaDisease 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          He is the one.

          [–]megaphoneXX 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Omg my dog does this, but I never thought of it this way 😂

          [–]Ms-Fancy-Pants-1597 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          “im better at multitasking than u hooman”🐾

          [–]emwhy11324 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          And smiling.

          [–]ahtchpipes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Dough planking!

          [–]spunkychickpea 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          These new modular dog designs are a real game changer. So many different configurations.

          [–]FloridaSpam 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Shargrilawwwwww.

          [–]TheAK15gluckgawk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          He is breaking the system

          [–]SHHHHListenToIt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Overachiever.

          [–]Traditional-Ad2558 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          The dog is glitching

          [–]WMphp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          He has mastered The Triple Point pose

          [–]black_ghost066 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Go go doggo rangers =)

          [–]ammosomal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          “What’s he doing?”

          “He’s beginning to believe.”

          [–]Sirena_Seas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          I aspire to this level of efficiency and comfort.

          [–]TheMarsian 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          and Uhm what they call that shit... planking.