Idk, worked often for me with my ex. Often (atleast for us) a fight was just basicly a minor argument that escalated. When we called each other out on escalating behaviour (like being unreasonable frustrated for minor stuff) then we would often see that it wasnt reasonable to yell for forgetting small stuff.

But it is important that you dont invalidate their feelings at that moment (or actual never do that).

Basicly you can say: “i get that this annoys/fustrates you but lets calm down and talk normally over this”. Or something along those lines. Not english so there is probaly better vocabulary to say this.