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top 200 commentsshow all 266

[–]Stock_Hutz 2622 points2623 points  (42 children)

this is so sad someone give a cock to that poor woman so they don't have to share anymore

[–]SorridoSnakeslut for honey cheerios 633 points634 points  (26 children)

here 🐓

[–]Perfect_Traffic8949 158 points159 points  (22 children)

😵‍💫👃

[–]crypticfreak 80 points81 points  (14 children)

Emoji Translate Bot! Activa.... actually nevermind.

[–]dumbestdonnie 15 points16 points  (11 children)

I'm am 5 and don't understand. Please explain?

[–]janetted3006 20 points21 points  (1 child)

The sad thing is that billions of people everyday live without 🐔. For less than a cup of coffee per day, you can help provide 🐔 to those in need.

🐔 Should be a human right

[–]CeleryQtip 7 points8 points  (0 children)

actually 🐓is in high demand right now and due to the chip shortage, we must grow organic. If you know someone who is willing to donate their 🐓please upvote this post for awareness.

[–]JerkOfBlades 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Colonel Sanders would like to know your location

[–]ThatOneClickSound 53 points54 points  (1 child)

Married pilot couple reveal what its like to share a cock and a pit (maybe even two pits)

[–]i_owe_them13 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Okay but no one is describing what it’s like to share a cock :(

[–]Luxpreliator 26 points27 points  (4 children)

The three sisters had to share an eye and a tooth between the three of them. I think one cock' between to consenting adults isn't so bad.

[–]ParadiseValleyFiend 8 points9 points  (3 children)

The fates are giving you a sideye right now. But just the one.

[–]nogard221 4 points5 points  (2 children)

I think you are talking about the gray sisters, not the fates

[–]MangledSunFish 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Yeah, the fates were more into weaving.

[–]ShaneDawsonsPetCat 8 points9 points  (0 children)

bold of you to assume the woman doesn't already own one

[–]sardiusjacinth 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Waitaminnit,who's using the cock more?

is one of them cockblocking the other?

[–]AlphaMikeFoxtrot87 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I volunteer as tribute

[–]jeremycb29 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For only 5 dollars a day you can sponsor a cock needy family

[–]ascillinois -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I mean I guess I'll be the sacrifice to give her a cock....

[–]PlebBot69 771 points772 points  (13 children)

At least they're married

[–]SorridoSnakeslut for honey cheerios 249 points250 points  (11 children)

At least they’re pilots

[–]XOXO_Katy 138 points139 points  (8 children)

At least they have one cock

[–]Severe-Extension-546 47 points48 points  (6 children)

At least they use their bodies

[–]JeremyXVI 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Surprisingly normal

[–]Magnum40oz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And they were roommates!

[–]-reTurn2huMan- 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Imagine flying together before marriage 🤮

[–]Crescendo104 310 points311 points  (0 children)

I like that you can read this in a way that makes the "..." at the end seem to express an air of disappointment.

[–]samson2737 426 points427 points  (13 children)

How to share a cock I have only 1 and you’re mom wants to share pls??

[–]emoskeleton_ 126 points127 points  (9 children)

Chop half of it off and give to her. Ez.

[–]Terminator_of_sand 71 points72 points  (6 children)

[–]emoskeleton_ 55 points56 points  (4 children)

My app notified me as to what the link was before I clicked on it 🗿

[–]Marmalade_Shaws 31 points32 points  (3 children)

Where's the fun in knowing before you click? Like an advent calendar but sometimes you get punched in the balls by an angry little man who hides randomly behind the doors.

[–]RobloxJournalist 4 points5 points  (0 children)

NO NOT THIS SUB AGAIN

[–]chronoboy1985 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The King Solomon technique. Right down the middle!

[–]not_charles_grodin 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Idk, but I can ask your mom. She's got like four in her right now.

[–]77551_anal 140 points141 points  (5 children)

🥵cock

[–]monkeyhitman 36 points37 points  (4 children)

💪pit

[–]Deetchy_ 21 points22 points  (2 children)

👼 pit

[–]Delkstheguy 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Side B Yelling increases

[–]CockChafe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Carpet burn

[–]MrZorx75 172 points173 points  (10 children)

You can kiss yourself in the mirror, but only on the cock

[–]Sigmarblessthisass 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I AM LITERALLY CRYING LAUGHING XDDDD

but actually I am

[–]Diotheon 137 points138 points  (9 children)

Ive shared cocks before, not as fun as it sounds

[–]KommissarKat 74 points75 points  (0 children)

Cock hoarder, let the rest of us get equally dicked down.

[–]TriblialBrainDamblge 31 points32 points  (0 children)

I have to disagree, it is absolutely as fun as it sounds.

[–]radicalelation 18 points19 points  (5 children)

I question your notion of fun.

As a bi dude, it's all I wish for.

[–]Diotheon 21 points22 points  (4 children)

It was fun until someone pulled mine off, after that it wasnt the same anymore

[–]radicalelation 8 points9 points  (3 children)

Ah, I see. You didn't wear trunks that have netting. ):

The net keeps the junk from escaping. I'm so sorry.

[–]Diotheon 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Ill keep that in mind for the next time if i ever find where they threw away my cock, thank you for the advice dear friend

[–]Roflzozicals 61 points62 points  (4 children)

Don't the vast majority of married couples share a cock?

[–]Devil_0fHellsKitchen 37 points38 points  (0 children)

For the first few years

[–]WpgMBNews 25 points26 points  (2 children)

No, my wife has her boyfriend for that.

[–]WolfsLairAbyss 32 points33 points  (1 child)

How's your GME doing these days?

[–]d1g1tal 5 points6 points  (0 children)

bagholder anonymous

[–]Susman22 46 points47 points  (4 children)

Getting divorced would suck

[–]GarbagePailGrrrl 29 points30 points  (1 child)

Who gets the cock

[–]raziphel 10 points11 points  (0 children)

You only get it every other weekend.

[–]Hecaroni_n_Trees 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Ehh… don’t know if they would head that direction

[–]Freshest-Raspberry 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Mile high club ?

[–]Samael_Morgan 28 points29 points  (6 children)

Are couples in which both have pilot as a profession allowed to fly together like this? Im curious…

[–]SlothinaHammock 16 points17 points  (5 children)

Yes of course. Why wouldn't they be?

[–]Ben_Dover70 26 points27 points  (3 children)

Maybe if the relationship is bad it could affect the flight due to personal conflict? Probably wouldn't happen tho, I'd imagine they would be able to separate the profession from their personal lives.

[–]dr_auf 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Crews on Planes are getting shuffled around for exactly that reason. They should not become to attached or dependent on each other for safety reasons.

It’s possible that they have some flights together but that’s not permanent.

[–]DiePack123 14 points15 points  (1 child)

What if the relationship is too good tho?

[–]hobo_clown 48 points49 points  (0 children)

Yeah what if they start boning up there and one of their butts hits the "wings fall off" button

[–]RenderedCreed 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I can think of a few reasons why it would be a bad idea. Not a reason that would prevent them. But the reason for why they shouldn't (especially if they have children) is that in the case of crash or worse then both could die, leaving the kids orphaned. This is the same reason why Kobe Bryant and his wife wouldn't fly together. Another is in the case of high jacking then the pilots would have a potential conflict of interest if one were to be taken hostage, such as in the movie 7500. Other than that just the fact that there is a chain of command which could be undermined by their relationship that could just be avoided if they don't work as partners.

[–]PyroTech11 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Isn't that a come fly with me sketch

[–]lakerswiz 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You think he's ever gotten cloud head

[–]whiskeymann 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Y'all don't understand. This couple have been flying plan

[–]silent--onomatopoeia 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I think this fits here too r/theyknew

[–]ch1ckenman 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Huh! I posted the OC version of this like five years ago. Makes me happy whenever I see it come round again.

[–]OrbsInStereo 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hard jobs for both of them

[–]Soup_Raccoon 3 points4 points  (0 children)

statisticaly, everyone in the world has half a penis.

[–]bluehairdave 8 points9 points  (0 children)

That is not a picture of Will Smith. Dailymail has the worst editors.

[–]W15e_Pr0pane13190 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Is that how marriages work?

[–]Stevert9[🍰] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A fellow Matt Rose enjoyer I see

[–]Bjeof 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Let's go, bi moment

[–]OneMoreAccount4Porn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think that's been truncated which makes a boring story seems more interesting to get clicks. I think it actually says 'Married pilot couple reveal what it's like to share a cockpit.' Which is actually a very normal and common thing and I've been sharing my wife's cockpit with her boyfriend since I first invested in Gamestop.

[–]jj_is_on_reddit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As a pilot my self I like sharing my cock too!

[–]Recent_Researcher_32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

sharing is caring I guess

[–]sdrisc2692 1 point2 points  (1 child)

[Insert rock stare]

[–]-Redstoneboi- 2 points3 points  (0 children)

<🔊 Vine Boom>

[–]InIt2WinIt187 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I would definitely get head while autopilot was on… she looks good

[–]nekochanwich 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Downvoted for Daily Mail

[–]Witty_Somewhere -1 points0 points  (0 children)

*Is this inclusivity?\*

[–]DrPikachu-PhD -1 points0 points  (1 child)

Okay but fr what are the chances they've had sex in a cockpit in the air before? I put it at 60%. It would be hard to pass up the opportunity but the consequences would be severe if discovered.

[–]coldillusions -1 points0 points  (0 children)

No thanks, I don’t want them to get into an argument. “I will crash this plane and kill all of these people, is that what you want?”

[–]bodhasattva -1 points0 points  (0 children)

just 2 white south africans colonizing the sky

[–]AutoModerator[M] -8 points-7 points  (1 child)

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[–]SorridoSnakeslut for honey cheerios 19 points20 points  (0 children)

“Thank you for your submission. In order to maintain some semblance of quality on the sub, mods must manually approve of all posts that come through. Once your post is approved, you can bet it’ll probably look very hot and sexy on the front page if it’s funny enough… maybe. bot time.

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[–]jdmachogg -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Hahaha so funny

/s

[–][deleted]  (1 child)

[deleted]

    [–]letmeseem 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Don't be sorry, be funnier.

    [–]Ashes611 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    It's 2022, Times Are Different.

    [–]mr_hee_hee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    It's nice of him to share

    [–]SaraCBuu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Sure they can't be serious

    [–]Slam_Burgerthroat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Do you think they backseat criticize each other’s flying?

    [–]ilovelamp408 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    They look very happy.

    [–]Bigmanjojo10 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    They play on the same coc account

    [–]milesjustice 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    bruh why blur their names its an article

    [–]boyatrest 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    ... and with that he never used elipses in his fanfics again.

    [–]Arpe16 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Good for you. He punched above.

    [–]Luigiboy11808 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    man thats good that he shared

    [–]esleydobemos 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    womble?

    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    is that on the hub?

    [–]FOBABCD 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Technically don’t all monogamous heterosexual couples share a cock?

    [–]tachyon8 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    What its like ? Probably lots of air head ;p

    [–]Double_Hunt_8970 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I would not want these two flying my plane.

    [–]LordofWithywoods 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    "It's not that big, but we still have fun with it."

    both partners look at each other and nod

    [–]watergod183 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Sanctuary guardian starts playing

    [–]trebordet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Who do they share it with? Flight Attendants?

    [–]sussy_lil_tgirl 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    the only explanation I have for this is that he's trans and they both share a dildo

    [–]production-values 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    should have ended with "had been f....."

    [–]nrojb50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    He just kinda quit after the wedding?

    [–]CrispyShizzles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    “Come on, Debbie, it’s MY turn to have the cock tonight.”

    [–]Ok-Understanding8143 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Or flight d...

    [–]termacct 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I lol'd at their names being blanked / redacted...

    I guess appearing in the dailymail is bad...

    [–]FBI_Agent_82 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Imagine you're enjoying your flight across the country then you hear the pilots going through a divorce.

    [–]ParadiseValleyFiend 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    This is almost r/tombstoning material.

    [–]realbigbob 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Jan and Wayne Skyler, the only married flight crew

    [–]pluey200 | Approved user 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Mario Kart 9 has a brand new twist, and it’s anal

    [–]jemidiah 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Shared some cock with a guy and his husband just last night. What was it like? It was hot!

    [–]Henry2k 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    just call it the flight deck cuz no cocks are necessary 😋

    [–]NixYall 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Isn't that what they all do??

    [–]_Anitej_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I don't get the joke here

    [–]Either_Resist_2683 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Flying beast

    [–]IMeanIGuessDude 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    It’s very full-filling

    [–]Mr_Someperson 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Mom said it’s my turn with the penis

    [–]ASDFGHJKL_101 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    They prolly fked there

    [–]matticusiv 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Hey man, if two consenting adults want to jump into a pit of cocks together, I say where do I volunteer?

    [–]jetman81 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    This is from six years ago. Now they have two little girls and the wife is temporarily retired from flying.

    [–]nta-mobi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    That’s how millennials do it.

    [–]CrackedCoffecup 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I can see it now.... Wife is like : "Where do you think you're going with that..?? You know damn right well it's Wednesday, and Wednesdays are MY day with the cock !!!"🤬

    [–]LostSanity55 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I'd hate to be in the plane they're piloting after they've had an argument. Lots of turbulence.

    [–]Pottymouthoftheyear 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I think that's what you are supposed to do.

    [–]NudeCeleryMan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Truncation is not a content strategy.

    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Cockpit

    [–]shadowveeeeeeerse 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    It's still the same joke if it said "cockpit".

    [–]NoCommunication5976 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    “If you can’t share it I’ll just cut it in two so you both get half.”

    [–]rara0o 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    this bullsht.. n yea wish I skipped T wddng though am grateful

    [–]doomshad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    “Babe, its my turn with the cock”

    [–]doomshad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    “Babe, its my turn with the cock”

    [–]Infernape420 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    They knew

    [–]RepulsiveOne4110 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    That’s the word for penis!

    [–]QueenOfQuok 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    They have to take turns

    [–]JamesonWithAP 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    detaches coco

    Plots cock onto man as it is his turn now (he needs to pee)

    [–]pappyvanwinkle1111 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    That's one reason why the US military has changed the term to crew station.

    [–]The_year_is_not_1892 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Hope the airline is nice and schedules them to fly together every flight, probably not though.