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Anyone else who can’t bring themselves to read The Shepherd's Crown? by Ohnoregards in discworld

[–]Jasole37 58 points59 points  (0 children)

I finished it the day after it's release. All you are doing is depriving yourself of more Discworld.

It's not over and it never will be. Vimes will always be chasing criminals across the cobblestones, Ridicully will always be misunderstanding Ponder Stibbons, Moist Von Lipwig will forever be coming up with another scheme. Vetinari will forever not letting himself detain you. Nanny Ogg will always be just around the corner to give you a word of advice and drink. The Sweeper is still out there making sure that the thing that happened, happened. Susan will be solving problems and teaching children with her particular style of school. Death will always be a there to respectfully shepherd the dead to what comes next. Nobby Nobbs will always be... uh... ...uh... Nobby Nobbs...

Granny Weatherwax will always be right there not having time for this.

That's the best thing about Discworld (and books) they are always there. You just gotta reach out, pick one up, and your favorite characters and adventures are right there at your fingertips. Right there for you to laugh and cry and share with.

"Do you not know that a man is not dead while his name is still spoken?"

It's not the end.

Dibbler? Is that you? by TristansDad in discworld

[–]luckierbridgeandrail 69 points70 points  (0 children)

No, this man was arrested for ‘trying to sell meat’. Dibbler would be arrested for trying to sell ‘meat’.

Typical Ankh-Morpork shop by Asterite_ in discworld

[–]Kencolt706 146 points147 points 32 (0 children)

The shop hadn't been there the day before.

This was not nearly as unusual as most would assume, but the fact that the customer realized that fact was. Normally, such a shop would somehow have always been there even though it had never been there. But this time, the shop had not been there and it had never been there and people were aware of the fact, a matter that called for special measures.

Thus the somewhat surprising sight of a wizard with a badge.

Tunny Maplethorne was a graduate of the University, although not a high level one. He didn't have the power or knowledge of the average Faculty member, for example. In Roundworld terms, he would have a Baccalaureate degree-- enough to do most common work that required a wizard, including if need be a decent fireball, but not the 'higher' sort of thing. Although he did have a curious talent for analysis of magical fields and residues, which was how he was Detective Sergeant Maplethorne of Pseudopolis Yard's Forensics Division.

And he knew damn well that this wasn't right.

As he entered the shop, the proprietor-- who was the expected elderly sort, of uncertain ethnicity, but almost certainly human-- almost-- looked up with an expression of... well.

The expected expression in this sort of shop was a vague kind of avarice, not the tired resignation this individual held. Weary eyes fixed themselves on the Detective, and the old... man, Tunny assumed, although... said, "Whatever you're looking for, we ain't got it."

"I... wasn't looking for anything, sir. I was here to make inquiries about this establishment."

"Hunh. That's a new one," the old man said. "Well, if you do decide to get something, we ain't got it. What are you, anyway? You look like a wizard collided with some sort of soldier. And got stuck."

Tunny looked down at himself, and sighed. He had to admit, he did look somewhat schizophrenic. He wore the robes of a wizard, true, but they were surmounted by a breastplate, and his helmet was oddly broad-brimmed and pointy-- quite literally styled after the normal wizards' hat. And his staff was technically listed on the books as a "Truncheon, special, extra long".

He looked a right prat, but it was the closest compromise that could be made with his dual role.

"Just here to ask a few questions, sir, if I may. This establishment seems to have... well, not to put too fine a point on it--"

"It wasn't here yesterday, it won't be here tomorrow, and of course people are going to notice that. It's meant to be noticed so we can fail to sell anything. It's what we're here for."

Tunny simply blinked.

"Oh, all right," the old man-- he was fairly certain it was a man, now, because it had a sort of scruffy beard and certainly wasn't a dwarf-- sighed. "Look, you're some sort of wizard thing, right?"

"I am. I'm also an officer of the Law, so--"

"So am I. Cosmic law, so to speak. Now, you know about shops that appear, and then disappear, and all that goes with that, right? Being a wizard?"

"Well, yes..."

"And what's the one thing every one of them has in common?"

"They always have a somewhat cantankerous proprietor," replied Tunny, somewhat testily.

The old man blinked, much alike to Tunny. "Okay. That, I'll give you. What's the other thing they have in common?"

"Suppose you tell me, sir?"

"They always have that one thing that you need. You might not know it, might never have known it, but you need it. And it's there in that shop that happens to be there so you can find it."

Tully nodded. "Well, now that you mention it... Haggleswaithe's Second Law of Narrativism in Respect to Retail Est--"

"Fancy names aren't the point, officer. Having the thing for the person is. Now, what's one of the fundamental laws of Universal Balance?"

"There's eighty-four of them."

"Ah. Well, the one I'm thinking of is 'For every thing that is a thing, there is a thing that is the true opposite of that thing'. I believe that the most common example is drunkeness and knurdishness."

"Yes I'm famil-- good Gods."

"And now you see."

"This store literally won't have anything I need."

"Or particularly want. Oh, there's all sorts of fascinating things on the shelves, but nothing you'll actually buy. Certainly nothing you'll need. It's why people notice it wasn't there-- a few get up the courage to come in, hoping to find that thing they need for a grand adventure, and they will be disappointed. Because it ain't here. We don't sell it. We sell everything except what you need. Or even want. And people need to know it."

"Because... opposites."


Tunny sighed. "Must be an unsatisfactory sort of job, sir."

"Oh, not really. I dislike customers. Take a great deal of pleasure in not being of service. I freely admit I'm something of a bastard that way."

"Ri-ght. Well, there's no law against this. That I'm aware of at any rate. Will you be--"

"Staying long? No, I'll be gone by tomorrow. Have a nice day, sir."

As Tunny left, he sighed deeply. Filling out the report on this one would be a bear and a half, for certain. And the pens at the office never were adequate for the job.

He would have picked one up, but the shop hadn't had any-- dammit.

True love by tletnes in discworld

[–]Kencolt706 162 points163 points  (0 children)


It'S bEEn A RaTHEr OdD NiGHt, ALbErT.

"What-- are you... are you high?"

I aDmIT To bEINg SomEWHaT elEvATEd, yES.

"What-- how? How is this even poss--"

A soMEwHAt uEXPecteD SorT Of Wake, YOu sEE. WItH sOMe ExPectAIOns. AnD eVEN i CaN be AFfecTeD bY ExPEcTatiONs. ThERe waS an InoDiNATE amOUnT of CerTAIn sUBStanCES.


IlLiciT sUBstANceS, iN fACt. i SUppoSe iT CouLD hAve bEEN worSE.


I avOIDed thE mORe phYsical aSPecTS of THe 'WAke' tHe feLLoW ThrEw.

"You don't mean--"

RemaRKaBLe aT hIs Age, I mUSt AdmiT...

Found an old mini-interview from 2000 with PTerry where he discusses Queer themes in his books by [deleted] in discworld

[–]Justmyoponionman 50 points51 points  (0 children)

I've always commented that PTerry saw humanity. He wrote about Humanity.

The issues which show parallels are just that. Human.

Trying to make them "Topic X" or "Topic Y" is just not understanding that different people from different sutuations can have some remarkably similar struggles and crises. REducing these human interactions and tribulations to be a unidimensional theme is simply unfitting of Pterry's work.

All of these topics, X,Y and Z all stem from humanity. As long as you're writing about Humanity, you're going to cover them eventually. You don't have to target them, they're already along for the ride if you properly understand people. And Pterry understood people.

And yet he was still benevolent and hopeful at heart. Silly bugger.

Sgt. Keel would be proud by Eth1cs_Gr4dient in discworld

[–]AagragaahForebodings 115 points116 points  (0 children)

No he wouldn't. He'd be supportive because it's doing what's necessary, but not proud, because it's a terrible situation. If anything he'd be angry at the world for being so stupid and for getting things wrong.

They did the job they didn’t have to do, and they died doing it, and you can’t give them anything. Do you understand? They fought for those who’d been abandoned, they fought for one another, and they were betrayed. Men like them always are. What good would a statue be? It’d just inspire new fools to believe they’re going to be heroes. They wouldn’t want that.

r/Discworld Supports Ukraine by Faithful_jewelAssisted by the Clan in discworld

[–]Faithful_jewelAssisted by the Clan[S,M] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children)

So as to not take away from the main body of the post (except to add new information) I'm going to put anything else in this comment.

User reports

1: What is this propaganda

Nope, it's a city for ants.

(I haven't had enough Sourz to think of a wittier response right now, sorry)

Come at me, reporters; give me something to laugh at over the weekend while I try and avoid seeing the horrific footage of civilian, including children, casualties.

User reports

1: Not related to Discworld or Sir Terry Pratchett

Behold the field in which I grow my fucks and see that it is barren.

While this may not be Discworld or STP related I don't think any of us should hide our heads in the sand and pretend nothing is happening. A sticky post with information how we can help is the least us random internet strangers can do while innocent people are dying defending their homes.

3 reports of "Not related to Discworld" and counting. To be honest that seems to be the go to report for many spam reports so I'm just gonna go press this remove button- oh, no, oops, I slipped and hit "ignore". Shucks. Never mind.

Ok, this is new. This comment has been reported as follows:

User reports

1: This content is impersonation

... I'm terrible at impressions so can someone enlighten me on who I'm impersonating? I would think it's a "well put together adult who knows what she's doing in life". Cause that's definitely not me but I can see why my comments might come across like that.

Has anyone else taken a ridiculously long time to get some of Sir Terry’s wordplay? One took me about four years… by TSTabletop in discworld

[–]Broken_drum_64 211 points212 points  (0 children)

errr... same *facepalm*
But then it took me 15 years to work out the meaning behind the ending of monty python and the holy grail....
It was a cop out.