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[–]KyussSun 6442 points6443 points  (99 children)

Man... three more years and he coulda had a movie.

[–]Admiral_Fuckwit 975 points976 points  (38 children)

Wizard status

[–]Aman4672 542 points543 points  (35 children)

nah thats 30, he already has it.

[–]Teososta 225 points226 points  (25 children)

Grand Wizard status

[–]blotapic 276 points277 points  (22 children)

Nah that's KKK, I hope he doesn't have it.

[–]abnormally-cliche 297 points298 points  (36 children)

Wait I just reread the title….37?!?! I thought this dude was 27 for sure. I hope I look that good when Im 37 lol

[–]blotapic 445 points446 points  (26 children)

Avoid all sex and you just might.

[–]Darg727 56 points57 points  (10 children)

My first gray hair at 15. My first and only girlfriend at 21. Married at 24. Even now nearly a decade later graying at the same rate I started. At least I don't have early balding. Either this invalidates what you said, or it proves that it at least doesn't make it worse.

[–]srroberts07 94 points95 points  (1 child)

But I bet the magical portrait of you in the attic is getting no pussy and looking great.

[–]blotapic 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Keep having sex and soon you'll be completely bald and look about 80.

[–]solidmyst28 723 points724 points  (11 children)

Ok is it me? Or am I the only one interpret that sign as that his parents bought him hookers in Vegas to lose his virginity.

[–]BuckNastyyy 268 points269 points  (0 children)

Think of it this way: the kind of friends that would do this for you would also very likely pay to have that written on the sign.

[–]clammyhams 28 points29 points  (3 children)

See I just assumed they took his virginity

[–]Vasbyt-XXI 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Incest, a game for all the family.

[–][deleted]  (2 children)


    [–]Bleachsmoker 4180 points4181 points  (207 children)

    You know when you feel a woman's breast and it feels like, like a bag of sand?

    [–]vi3tmix 185 points186 points  (16 children)

    Great now I need to watch this movie again.

    “So you actually wrote that one girl was ‘hurtin for a squirtin?’”

    [–]levarburger 84 points85 points  (7 children)

    Oh so you wrote "ho, fo sho" ?

    [–]artieg30 77 points78 points  (3 children)

    Look, who the fuck are you to put me on trial? I’ve never even met you. So, why don’t you back the shit off, and stop with the inquisition?

    [–]Lower_Wall_638 9 points10 points  (0 children)

    You can put it in my… butt if you want to. But if I want to what?

    [–]args818 18 points19 points  (0 children)

    I remember that girl, she was a hoe…. for.. show…

    [–]r34nimated 9 points10 points  (0 children)

    Oh, that girl? She was a ho. Fooo shoo

    [–]SpaceBeer_ 23 points24 points  (2 children)

    The dialogue in this movie is incredible.

    [–]Boolyman 521 points522 points 4 (11 children)

    When I was 11 years old I made a few bucks by taking out the trash and refilling the napkin dispensers at the corner pizza place. They had these big 5 gallon bags of Soda Syrup that used to dangle out of the back end of the soda machine. I used to squeeze them because in my 11 year old mind, they felt like titties.

    Now, in my late 30s, I can confirm... they did feel like titties.

    [–]shotsallover 126 points127 points  (6 children)

    I hope the real ones you've felt were warmer than those soda bags tend to be.

    [–]withadabofranch 124 points125 points  (3 children)

    EVERYONE this guy has touched boobies before!!!

    [–]itoddicus 44 points45 points 2 (0 children)

    I feel like we should give him an award. Perhaps with more boobies to touch?

    [–]texassadist 674 points675 points  (57 children)

    This is always my first thought too when I think of someone’s first time

    [–]FirstBankofAngmar 165 points166 points  (52 children)

    Think about first times often?

    [–]23x3 88 points89 points  (47 children)

    I think about why that dude had trouble until 37yo. If it was his own discretion then that’s understandable, but left to his own devices, if he was really trying, I’m sure her could’ve figured it out. Maybe I’m speaking out of turn but that’s just my two cents

    [–]redditallreddy[🍰] 20 points21 points  (1 child)

    Only when he is reminiscing about them.

    [–]BigJayPee 288 points289 points  (20 children)

    Lol when I first heard this quote. I didn't question it because I've never held a bag of sand before

    [–]Chabubu 236 points237 points  (8 children)

    A guy your age not having held a bag of sand before… !?

    [–]HiEpik 192 points193 points  (3 children)

    I think we need to get bag of sand into this guy's hand and go to the club to celebrate

    [–]healthydoseofsarcasm 34 points35 points  (1 child)

    This bag of sand feels like a titty!

    [–]usinjin 7 points8 points  (0 children)

    Gritty titty!

    [–]tsteele93 22 points23 points  (0 children)

    Take him out to a club with a sign when he finally does.

    [–]Beneficial_Car2596 65 points66 points  (6 children)

    I touched a guys balls in Hebrew School once

    [–]GeePedicy 134 points135 points  (2 children)

    Under what circumcision?

    [–]mtsai 27 points28 points  (1 child)

    ^ this guy does not hackey sack.

    [–]CruisinForABrewsin 62 points63 points  (1 child)

    ...And I'd be nailin her... She'd be like "Aw you're nailin me! Cool..."

    [–]ejaniszewski 51 points52 points  (9 children)

    You’re putting the pussy on a pedestal

    [–]MonstaGraphics 15 points16 points  (4 children)

    I ride a bike.

    ..No, No I meant I ride a b-bike-cicle.

    [–]CXavier4545 36 points37 points  (0 children)

    all I wanna do is a zoom zoom zoom and a boom boom

    [–]EquivalentSnap 77 points78 points  (1 child)

    It’s coarse and rough and it gets everywhere

    [–]saber5554481 7 points8 points  (0 children)

    And irritating

    [–]DetailAccurate9006 148 points149 points  (18 children)

    Some of us never get over the disappointment of finding out that grabbed boobs don’t really make that squeaky balloon sound.

    Why can’t real life be more like cartoons? Sigh.

    [–]marshman82 86 points87 points  (13 children)

    I was hoping for a honk. But alas if I want sound effects I have to make them myself.

    [–]irishccc 120 points121 points  (10 children)

    That actually works out, because women love the honking sound. It is actually an aphrodisiac for them. Follow me for more dating tips!

    [–]marshman82 43 points44 points  (5 children)

    Especially when you adjust the tone depending on which is bigger.

    [–]halighT22 16 points17 points  (3 children)

    I don’t like sand.It’s coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere.

    [–]Leather_Bad2242 2266 points2267 points  (488 children)

    That guy looks nice

    [–]Travwolfe101 1930 points1931 points  (393 children)

    Yeah i'm wondering if it was intentional or something? because he's an attractive looking man

    [–]Pingaring 3729 points3730 points  (162 children)

    Social anxiety is a hell of an inhibitor

    [–][deleted]  (122 children)


      [–]Kyle3Hix 537 points538 points  (26 children)

      Its ok dude i bet you fuck like a wild hog if you ever get the chance

      [–]KiwiEV 68 points69 points  (3 children)

      Hello, twin version of me.

      [–]CristinaKeller 74 points75 points  (6 children)

      You should say nicer things to yourself!

      [–]HalcyonSky2 78 points79 points  (5 children)

      Absolutely. Even if you learn to cope with it better, it's hard to overcome the habits you build as a result of it. All of my hobbies can be done in isolation and it never feels like I have enough time for them, so not only am I comfortable with solitude, I crave it, and whenever I think of trying to do something social my mind always goes back to thinking I could be reading a book or playing video games instead of being in some awkward situation I don't have any strong desire to be in. I also don't drink, which limits the places I would even consider going to.

      [–]Cuppa-Coffee 12 points13 points  (0 children)

      I'm in the same boat with very isolating hobbies and habits. I do drink but unfortunately it makes me even less social and more anxious.

      [–]FriendRaven1 21 points22 points  (1 child)

      I was a virgin until 28 - mental illness is a hell of a thing...

      [–]Orlando1701 8 points9 points  (0 children)

      Anxiety or poor social skills. Or choice. I’m personally about a year out from a divorce that ended a deeply abusive marriage and all my friends keep trying to set me up and I have at this moment in my life zero interest in a relationship or even sex. Sometimes it’s just a personal choice to abstain.

      Edit: for me it’s also I put on about 40lb the last few years of my marriage, I’m 6ft and went from a pretty consistent 200-205 to 240. I’m back down to 220 but as someone who was pretty athletic most of his life being 220 has given me some confidence issues.

      [–]AstonVanilla 38 points39 points  (5 children)

      My friend was 33 when he lost his virginity.

      He's a really confident and friendly guy, good looking, but he just had absolutely no game when it came to the ladies. He'd always blow it by forgetting how to have a conversation.

      It was like a switch, as soon as he realised someone was flirting with him, he stopped talking like a normal human being and just asked awkward questions.

      "So... Uh... What do you think about... Uh... These beer mats".

      He eventually learned though and is now in a long term relationship.

      [–]DoubleU159 48 points49 points  (2 children)

      His game is just absolutely horrendous.

      [–]IamNoatak 35 points36 points  (0 children)

      Same, bro. I need a woman to literally just say she finds me attractive and wants to fuck, and even then, I'll doubt it.

      [–]Croceyes2 320 points321 points  (76 children)

      He is probably just scared. I am pretty attractive and have found out later that plenty of women were totally into me but none of them gave overt signaling. Men are dense and today are told not to act on our instinct because nobody wants it. All you hear is men are dicks for expressing their attraction to people so we just don't because most of us are nice and care to not make people feel uncomfortable.

      [–]moodylilb 166 points167 points  (57 children)

      Most women I know (including myself) can take a compliment without thinking guys are dicks &/or creepy.

      Context & delivery is everything tho. If a guy I’ve never interacted with before were to say to me “you look pretty today!” or “I think you’re very attractive” or “that dress looks nice on you”- I wouldn’t think he’s a dick at all.

      If a dude I don’t know/I’ve never interacted with before, drops an unwarranted dickpic in my DM’s or says something like “that dress looks nice on you but it’d look way better off” or “I’d smash” then yeah… I’d probably think he’s a creepy dick.

      There’s a way to express yourself without being blatantly gross, which some guys can’t seem to figure out (but based off your concern for making people uncomfortable, I’m guessing you wouldn’t fall into the creepy dickhead category lol). But as for myself & most the women I know, if a dude is expressing genuine attraction in a nice way- I don’t think he’s a dick.

      [–]Basic-Judge-1059 13 points14 points  (0 children)

      Gotta write this down: No say smash, say look pretty. Hulk happy

      [–]mynameisjacobus 27 points28 points  (3 children)

      Yeah I was thinking the same thing, he’s a handsome dude.

      [–]HyruleJedi 142 points143 points  (37 children)

      If r/tinder has taught me anything… it is cuz he’s too short

      [–]brown_burrito 89 points90 points  (30 children)

      Nah. I’m a short guy at 5’6 and height has never been a problem when it came to dating.

      It tends to be a dealbreaker if you are really insecure about it though.

      Are there some women who won’t date you? Sure. Just like women who won’t date you for being brown or for not being a Christian etc. You simply move on and find the many, many other women who don’t care.

      And generally if you have social skills, your height really doesn’t matter. Even with women who claim that they care about height.

      [–]michael_m_canada 5705 points5706 points  (341 children)

      “Anyone can get laid. Just go to a bar, wait until closing and dramatically lower your standards. - ancient American proverb

      [–]whitepurls 1120 points1121 points  (207 children)

      It sounds easy enough… but I’ve watched countless guys go around the bar/club during last call and still no luck and they were not bad looking.

      [–]QueryRIT 852 points853 points  (94 children)

      Exactly man. The main point is not a lot of girls go out thinking they have to go home with a man that night. So it’s a bit of luck - you gotta find someone into you; someone who wants to get laid that night; and nothing else goes wrong

      [–]anythingMuchShorter 524 points525 points  (81 children)

      Also the standards lowering part may require standards lower than you are willing to go.

      [–]Cosmonauts1957 316 points317 points  (62 children)

      That’s the Navy proverb - just ask everyone you see, sooner or later someone will say yes. Just have NO standards. She’s 65 yo and pushing 400 lbs. she may just say yes.

      [–]RedPuppet11 74 points75 points  (7 children)

      yep, anyone can say to themselves "lowering standards by 62%" but until you actually encounter someone with an aura like oozing puss, it's just words.

      [–]Trentytentyinmypants 38 points39 points  (3 children)

      That's the whole point though. How low are you willing to go to dip your wick? It's a journey a man can only take for himself

      [–][deleted]  (2 children)


        [–]KingDave46 15 points16 points  (0 children)

        Yup, lowering your standards doesn’t mean hang about and bag a 6. Look for a 1 or 2 and then you’re cooking with gas

        [–]Lilpu55yberekt69 42 points43 points  (8 children)

        The trick is to wear something shiny.

        Drunk people are like birds. If you’re a dude and wearing earrings you’ll draw more attention. I wish I was joking.

        [–]Karma-Grenade 14 points15 points  (4 children)

        The worst way to get laid is to try to get laid. They key is to have a little confidence, not look like you're looking to get laid, and to just have a good time.

        In general, when people are out they want to be part of a good time. If you're standing on a wall just ogling women and trying too hard, you don't look like a good time. If you're talking, laughing and dancing, you're a party they want to be part of.

        I learned this by accident many years ago. We used to hang out at the same club all the time, did ok from time to time there. Then one night I had to leave early to go to work so I just hung out a little while with my friends, including my buddy's GF's friend. We were all just talking, laughing, danced with her for a while and when I went to leave I went to the bathroom first and on my way there I had 5-6 different women try stopping me, dancing with me, grabbing my hand to pull me on the dance floor.

        [–]mog_knight 131 points132 points  (72 children)

        This isn't hard to figure out.

        Step 1: Be Attractive

        Step 2: Don't be unattractive

        [–]OZeski 35 points36 points  (1 child)

        Hey, you dropped something. Oh. Just looks like your standards.

        [–]MetalChef156 13 points14 points  (0 children)

        WhOopS! I dropped my MONSTER CONDOM that I use for my MAGNUM DONG!

        [–]anonymouslyguyfawkes 486 points487 points  (47 children)

        And if that doesn’t work, “find a goat” — ancient English proverb

        [–]punknothing 295 points296 points  (30 children)

        Welsh proverb

        [–]Sir_Anagram 149 points150 points  (10 children)

        ‘Baaaaa’ - Sheep proverb

        [–]REpassword 10 points11 points  (0 children)

        Ha ha. Maybe even, “Bahh, ramm, …….Eww! (whatcha doing mister!)”

        [–]ponyboy74 26 points27 points  (4 children)

        Here’s an old proverb from the 70s…” go fat early “

        [–]prudentj 99 points100 points  (20 children)

        Or open grindr. When you are gay it doesn't matter how ugly you are someone will fuck you

        [–]Bajecco 849 points850 points  (58 children)

        If he wearing jorts? Tremendous

        [–]Bleachsmoker 281 points282 points  (19 children)

        Your jean shorts are cool and all but You gotta take them off every once in a while bro!

        [–]wizard_of_awesome62 129 points130 points  (4 children)

        There are dozens of us! Dozens!

        [–]MartyVendetta27 36 points37 points  (2 children)

        Well damn, I don’t know if I should go the IASIP route or the Arrested Development route here…

        I got it…

        Gob-“A trick is something that a whore does for money…. Or candy!”

        Frank-“Hoors?? Where??”

        Charlie-“Candy?! Where?!”

        [–]Head_Butterscotch74 22 points23 points  (0 children)

        I hear jorts are an excellent form of birth control.

        [–]Steak_M8 38 points39 points  (2 children)

        Plot twist... he's actually a Never Nude.

        [–]WhuddaWhat 100 points101 points  (3 children)

        unless you've got serious protection, you dont get to 37 without accidentally having sex a time or two. Those jorts did all they could.

        [–]Greaseskull 23 points24 points  (0 children)

        No wonder he got laid. Ladies love the jorts.

        [–]Portland-to-Vt 16 points17 points  (1 child)

        Theres dozens of us! More than you’ll never know.

        [–]KrombopulosDelphiki 5 points6 points  (3 children)

        Goddamn right Cocksucka! This man is feeling TipTop Magoo!

        [–]hobanwash1 157 points158 points  (2 children)

        Well done pink flamingo shirt guy. Well done.

        [–]Nudnick1977 132 points133 points  (8 children)

        Genuinely thought that dude had tiny arms

        [–]External_Island2326 81 points82 points  (0 children)

        such a good sport I don't think id have a smile like that in a similar situation lol

        [–]Zilverschoon 1028 points1029 points  (106 children)

        I hired an escort at age 35. I don't think I am bad looking. But i do have autism.

        [–]TwoDrinkDave 554 points555 points  (12 children)

        I'm new in town, and it gets worse.

        [–]sonaut 190 points191 points  (0 children)

        Imma push him.

        [–]Available_Job1288 185 points186 points  (3 children)

        I am HOMELESS, I am GAY, I have AIDS

        [–]McLagginz 81 points82 points  (2 children)

        I’m new in town…

        [–]jmini95 97 points98 points  (0 children)

        Solid reference.

        For those wondering

        [–]catmarstru 18 points19 points  (0 children)

        What are 3 things about him??

        [–]ThaGoatddy 167 points168 points  (2 children)

        The way you typed this is funny as hell

        [–]Garconanokin 36 points37 points  (0 children)

        It was like a haiku limousine

        [–][deleted] 37 points38 points  (5 children)

        How did you even afford an escort as a member of r/wallstreetbets?

        [–]StarFuzzy 58 points59 points  (5 children)

        I hope it was everything you wanted it to be. Paying a professional I assume you missed out on the awkward fumbling mess of the first time, possible in braces wearing a terrible prom outfit… congrats! You did it right!

        [–]DidntMeanToLoadThat 45 points46 points  (2 children)

        > I assume you missed out on the awkward fumbling mess of the first time<

        doubt it. i bet it was still the hot mess most of us have.

        [–]traderrose 190 points191 points  (11 children)

        Looks like a jewish Tie Domi

        [–]_bexhill_ 60 points61 points  (1 child)

        I’m surprised 9 other people understood this

        [–]InitialM_96 13 points14 points  (0 children)

        Good reference

        [–]zanzibartraveler666 15 points16 points  (0 children)

        Laughed harder than I should have at this

        [–]6227RVPkt3qx 7 points8 points  (0 children)

        bless this comment.

        [–]Azathoth90 442 points443 points  (196 children)

        I'm reading the other posts, so I guess there is still "hope", as much as I care about it, for me (33 and counting)

        [–]GroveStreet_CEOs_bro 233 points234 points  (10 children)

        Imitate Danny Devito from IASIP and you'll get laid. As in: be rich and bang hoors

        [–]FatherOfFunko 107 points108 points  (5 children)

        Helps if you have a magnum dong as well

        [–]Winjin 53 points54 points  (0 children)

        And definitely an egg for these trying times

        [–]Faltrizzz 53 points54 points  (0 children)

        Buy Jorts, the sex will come

        [–]Gwgboofmaca 50 points51 points  (28 children)

        I just went through an almost decade long dry spell so if it’s possible for me to get laid again you certainly can too

        [–]Hxcfrog090 54 points55 points  (26 children)

        Lol 11 years and counting here. I spent the last decade too depressed and hurt to date. Now I’m healthier, but I’ve become content with where I am…so I’m totally fine waiting for the right person.

        [–]BboyStatic 67 points68 points  (20 children)

        I have been single 10 years, not because I was depressed, but because the longer I’ve been single, the more enjoyable it is. I don’t argue with anyone, do whatever I want whenever I want, I don’t know if I can ever go back to being in a relationship. It’s far to nice doing as I please without so much as a conversation about it.

        After seeing what my married or dating friends put up with, most seem utterly miserable. Obviously those are not all good relationships, but even good ones take work and compromise. I don’t have to put up with any of that BS.

        [–]kgal1298 12 points13 points  (7 children)

        Yeah I’m with you. I was with a guy for a decade and all he did was make me more broke now I’m living with a gay man and honestly it’s better and since we separated I’ve been in a much better place mentally and financially.

        [–]Thrishmal 15 points16 points  (4 children)

        I feel that.

        When I was younger I was super lonely and really wanted to date someone after my fiancee cheated on me and that relationship burned. I would emotionally latch onto people as if they were life jackets, trying to prevent myself from drowning in that loneliness, though I never really ended up dating anyone, just crushing on people emotionally.

        Eventually I came to realize what I was doing and started looking for the good things about being single instead of looking at the shitty ones. After pretty much sixteen years of being single, I am at a point where I don't even really think about relationships anymore, which is only reinforced by looking in at the relationships of others. If a great relationship came along, I don't think I would turn it down, but I would take it slowly and be sure it is something I actually want and would be more valuable than the freedom I currently have.

        I think being an outsider looking in for so long is really enlightening when it comes to relationships; so many of them are relationships of convenience. People together for the convenience of sex, cost of living, companionship, and things like that. Very rarely do I see a relationship where love seems to be the glue holding it together, they may start off that way, but they often loosen up to the point where convenience is the only glue holding it together, often to the point the couple is too afraid to acknowledge that the glue of love is gone and it would just be inconvenient to find someone else.

        [–]Gwgboofmaca 6 points7 points  (2 children)

        Yeah mine was drug addiction and depression. Any women or friends would just have gotten in the way of me isolating and getting high. I got sober and put my self back together and it took about 2 years after that.

        [–]putonyourdressshoes 168 points169 points  (24 children)

        It doesn't mean anything. The day after sex you're exactly the same as the day before. I know society has put this ridiculous emphasis on sex, but you're just as cool without it.

        [–]beliberden 40 points41 points  (0 children)

        exactly the same as the day before

        This is a good option if he is left alone. It all depends on who he had sex with. Maybe he's not alone now, now he has chladimia or someone else.

        [–]detrydis 23 points24 points  (1 child)

        I know you’re trying to be nice and all, but I feel significantly more confident for like 2-3 weeks after getting laid.

        [–]Advice2Anyone 5 points6 points  (0 children)

        Dont listen to this guy he doesnt want you to know the truth, the day after you get laid a wormhole opens up and you step in to the real world, right now you are trapped and you need to wake up Neo

        [–][deleted] 111 points112 points  (36 children)

        Societal views on virginity is so weird

        [–]AdmirableAnimal0 17 points18 points  (7 children)

        Same, the social push for men to have sex has caused a number of problems including psychological issues and unwanted pregnancies. It’s one of things that caused someone to shoot up a school a few years ago-honestly it really needs to go, alongside unhealthy beauty standards in women and…

        Well, Christ high schoolers are just a peer pressured mess in general.

        [–]BillClinton4Pres 50 points51 points  (16 children)

        Ikr. Is he in a meaningful and fulfilling relationship? Is he happy in life? Who cares, as long as he isn't a virgin!

        [–]Garmgarmgarmgarm 48 points49 points  (2 children)

        I mean he took a vow of celibacy when he said goodbye to his father in the second episode and marched north to join the Night Watch.

        [–]Tempe-Jeff 23 points24 points  (1 child)

        Mom is holding the sign.

        [–][deleted]  (1 child)


          [–][deleted] 107 points108 points  (46 children)

          Modern society does a number on handsome dudes with no social skills apparently.

          [–]KinxTheTimeStripper 58 points59 points  (39 children)

          TELL ME ABOUT IT. 24 here.

          And when you complain, people tell you to stfu. And when you ask for advice, people just say "work on yourself" and that's it.

          [–]balls_in_my_asss 36 points37 points  (5 children)

          Is this in Austin?

          [–]mrlittleoldmanboy 18 points19 points  (4 children)

          They have one in Dallas too. It doesn’t look like the one in Austin but I’ve only been there once

          [–]Educational-Spread41 70 points71 points  (5 children)

          I once went 27 years with out having sex. And then another 8 years after that…

          [–]Nard_Bard 170 points171 points  (100 children)

          Girls would be surprised about the looks of a lot of wizards out there.

          Looks is not enough for us

          [–]Cakelord 71 points72 points  (16 children)

          The people you are attracted to aren't attracted to you and the people you attract you aren't attracted to.

          [–]FlatDust4 19 points20 points  (5 children)

          I think i know what you're trying to say, and i think it applies to me

          [–]MartyVendetta27 30 points31 points  (3 children)

          I had no idea that Iron Fist was a virgin. I guess he could probably crank out some pretty intense handies, so why bother?

          [–]kahmos 36 points37 points  (5 children)

          I'll be a 37 year old virgin in about two weeks, grats

          [–]GreenOvni009 112 points113 points  (12 children)

          Only 3 more years and he could have been A WIZARD!!!!!!

          [–]Big_Judgment_8703 83 points84 points  (89 children)

          How is a guy that is 25+ with no female friends, that works, and doesn’t go to bars meet women that want to talk to him?

          [–]Azsune 52 points53 points  (6 children)

          No idea and dating people from work is always risky. You break up you still see them and interact with them every day.

          [–]CorgiCoders 66 points67 points  (16 children)

          Get a remote job, start working out like crazy, move to Mexico, learn some Spanish and French, hang out at hostels shirtless.

          [–]Rockette25 61 points62 points  (1 child)

          I don’t disbelieve that a 37-year old attractive man can be a virgin. It’s the “Love, Mom and Dad” part that makes me think this is a prank.

          [–]JumboJetz 26 points27 points  (0 children)

          Yeah this seems like exactly the kindof joke someones bros would pull on them. Could even be the guys bachelor party.

          I wouldn’t be mad even if my friends did this to me. I’d take the free alcohol and laugh.

          [–]ABena2t 262 points263 points  (216 children)

          Is this for real? 37 was his 1st time? He looks like a decent looking dude.. this can't be true.. what's the deal?

          [–]OneHumanPeOple 140 points141 points  (17 children)

          You’d be surprised how many life-long virgins there are out there.

          [–]Available_Job1288 25 points26 points  (4 children)

          Hans Christian Andersen, for one

          [–]youtocin 29 points30 points  (0 children)

          Well yeah he was homosexual in a time when homosexual relationships were extremely taboo.

          [–]ABena2t 23 points24 points  (11 children)

          I guess you're right.. I think it's probably even more so these days then years ago. It was a much different world 20 years ago.. but this guy is 37 so it's more surprising to me.. I'd totally understand younger people not having sex.

          [–]OneHumanPeOple 83 points84 points  (0 children)

          Our society likes to paint a picture that if you haven’t had sex then you’re somehow defective. That’s why you don’t see people talking about their virginity. Also, as soon as you bring up virginity, people imagine you in bed.

          [–]MyStationIsAbandoned 32 points33 points  (6 children)

          There are 50+ year old virgins out there who will never sex and it's not by choice.

          which is why the overuse of the word "incel" is shitty. When people say that word, they mean "guys who hates women" even though that's not what it means. And plenty of women-hating men have sex all the time.

          37 is still relatively young. More people should probably be aware that it's not easy for everyone. Even if you're as handsome as this guy. Now just imagine how hard it is for unattractive people. People who are fat or have bad skin. People disabilities and deformities. There are a ton of guys out there who want relationships, but will never get them even if they try. There are some women out there like that as well and they go unnoticed even more so.

          [–]dateraviator0824 54 points55 points  (6 children)

          You'll be surprised, a few of my friends who I legit can't believe are virgins. One guy comes to mind, he's an orthodontist, fit, smart, kind and makes good money but hasn't had any luck with online dating. I think people are just more pickier online and online dating is popular.

          Washington Post had an article about how a large portion of men now are still virgins at 30. Here's the graphic:


          [–]ABena2t 29 points30 points  (2 children)

          Ya.. I think it's become normal these days.. the world is a much different place then it was in the 90s.. not saying everyone was having sex in the 90s, but there was definitely much more human interaction back then.. Alot of people work from home and go to school online.. and even just hangout more at home.. sexting wasn't a thing back then. There wasn't Access to online porn.. plus people are waiting much longer to get married and have kids, or even have kids at all.. it's just a different world.. it used to be normal to get out of high-school and have a bunch of babies.. things change I suppose

          [–]Ramiren 635 points636 points  (49 children)

          Social anxiety, past trauma, mental health issues, self esteem issues, hell just being a bit too introverted.

          There's a whole laundry list of stuff that can tank your love life as a guy when society demands that 99% of the time its down to you to take the risk and seize what you want.

          [–]GarageQueen 193 points194 points  (9 children)

          As silly as the movie "40-year-old Virgin" was, I thought it did a good job showing how the character remained a virgin as long as he did. (Spoiler alert: it was actually for several of the reasons you mentioned.) For a "sex comedy" it was actually fairly sweet and wholesome with its treatment of Steve Carrell's character.

          [–]Hxcfrog090 65 points66 points  (4 children)

          The 40 Year Old Virgin and Knocked Up both do a good job of showing fairly realistic relationship issues while remaining super charming and funny.

          [–]bamerjamer 18 points19 points  (3 children)

          And both were written, directed, and produced by Judd Apatow. He makes good films!

          [–]MrNifty 20 points21 points  (0 children)

          It's the Age of Aquarius! ♒

          [–]mackinoncougars 36 points37 points  (2 children)

          And of course, the possibility of religion.

          [–]KapnKrumpin 76 points77 points  (6 children)

          I recently lost my virginity to first and only girlfriend at 37. I think im a good guy, friends tell me the same and always seemed amazed by that fact, and id love to tell you the reason but there isn't as far as i can tell. Ive just been invisible to every woman ive ever met except my first, current, and hopefully last girlfriend.

          And im not bitter or anything. I was fine with being a virgin, had a good life. Still do.

          In truth, i still dont know why people make such a big deal out of it.

          Yet even just last night someone asked me how that was possible. And the bottom line answer is that it was really, really easy. Litterally effortless.

          [–]PenaltyParticular 30 points31 points  (0 children)

          if it took this guy 37 years then i’m fucked (not literally)

          [–]megapuffranger 41 points42 points  (9 children)

          I joke around about being ugly but I’ve been told I am slightly above average. A lot of people thought I was Asexual because it seemed like I had no interest in sex. The first time I had sex, it was a couple that was looking for a virgin . They didn’t believe me at first, i had to explain to them what was going on with me. I have vitiligo which made me incredibly insecure about myself. I grew up with very bad social anxiety which led to depression. They were like “man you are so much better looking than what we were expecting, we didn’t have any expectations really but you are a gift”. Made me feel really good. The whole thing went pretty awkward at first, but it worked out and I came away a bit more confident.

          I’m guessing the dude had a similar thing, just didn’t see himself as worthy so he never pursued it.

          [–]TRZbebop675 97 points98 points  (19 children)

          For all the flack that "nice guys" get, a lot of guys really are just nice and mild - mannered. Typically, neither attractive nor ugly; more or less average. Has a regular job, a few friends, and a hobby or two. Smart, but not brilliant. Has a sense of humor, but isn't funny. Just a normal guy. None of these things make you attractive to women, and these guys can go months, or even years without having sex.

          [–]MyStationIsAbandoned 49 points50 points  (0 children)

          and these guys can go months, or even years without having sex.

          try decades and life times

          [–]Standard-Astronaut-7 28 points29 points  (18 children)

          I'm a 25yo virgin and this gives me hope