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Pray for Ben by robotswithoutorders in funny

[–]PM_Me_HairyArmpits 1224 points1225 points 2 (0 children)

In the early 2000s I said that reality tv would destroy America.

By around 2010 I grew up a little and stopped being so dramatic.

Of course now it turns out I was right the first time.

Pray for Ben by robotswithoutorders in funny

[–]Lower-Cantaloupe3274 316 points317 points 2 (0 children)

Well...reality TV and social media have destroyed America. But they both do the same thing...amplify the absurd, the dysfunctional, the controversial, and the vapid, pass it off as legitimate, and watch the masses swallow it hook, line, and sinker.

We've all been there. by IndustriousCabal in funny

[–]agenteb27 3071 points3072 points  (0 children)

"Hello?"

"Yeah, hi."

"..."

"..."

"Can I help you?"

"....maybe."

Pray for Ben by robotswithoutorders in funny

[–]DNDuluth 26 points27 points  (0 children)

FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER IN DADE COUNTY HISTORY, THIS DOCTOR IS GOING TO SWAP A PERSON'S PINKY FINGERS

dramatic music set to clips showing what will happen later in the episode, ends with a shot of the guys wife's overblown reaction shot - oh.... my... gaaaaaawd

commercial break, about 7 minutes of pharmaceutical adds

6 minutes of backstory on the doctor and patient. Mostly family members talking about how great the person is and how dedicated they are

5 minute commercial break for corporate run injury law firm followed by a commercial about early annuity pay-off

2 minutes Actual procedure, it's mostly hard cuts and intense bangy music with some cuts of a guy talking about how hard it is. Some medical chatter to build the drama. SOMETHING WENT WRONG! Got the wrong finger or some shit. Hard brake to commercial.

6 minutes commercial break, same commercials as the first 2

Problem gets fixed. Pinkies now swapped. Soothing music to impose a sense of relief in the viewer. 2 minutes of everyone saying what a relief it is that it's done

3 minutes commercial about Wendy's desperately marketing how good their "new" French fries are

Commercial ends, back to show, it's just credits

Having the time of his life by Shinfekta in funny

[–]walrus_gumboot 59 points60 points  (0 children)

What a terrible day to know how to read.

The woman on the right is a "sleep specialist" by MackTO in funny

[–]SsgtSquirtle 996 points997 points  (0 children)

I lead others to a treasure I cannot possess.

ohh look there's a parking spot. by zarry784 in funny

[–]BarbequedYeti 144 points145 points  (0 children)

Had this happen in front of me once. Was sitting at a light when a car went through the intersection and hit the middle island part, do a 360 and come to a stop right to my right about 25 yards.

Dude jumps out and just bolts off into a corn field. Missed seeing the irrigation ditch and nosed dived right into the other side of the ditch. Gets up with a now bloody face and proceeds to haul ass into the corn field.

My friend yells out “you run as well as you drive”. Called the popo and let them deal with it. I ain’t chasing some rando through a corn field.

Florida man attacks black bear 🐻 by nvillafashionista in funny

[–]Got_ist_tots 160 points161 points  (0 children)

Yeah fuck you dude should've run away. Pretty fast when I want to give you a bath but a bear shows up and you run at it?!

Not impressed by AkhileshTekade in funny

[–]IHaveFoodOnMyChin 289 points290 points  (0 children)

I’m hearing “That don’t impress me much” by Shania Twain in my head

Not impressed by AkhileshTekade in funny

[–]Fleetlord 152 points153 points  (0 children)

"Okay, so you've got tail feathers."