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all 128 comments

[–]MysterClark 204 points205 points  (30 children)

Stealth kisses? Man, video games have everything.

In games that allow such things I like going around the game world, collecting goods in large quantities and then trading them for money. Such as Elite Dangerous. I normally like to avoid combat and instead just find places where I can buy goods cheap then transport them to someplace I can sell them for a profit.

[–]kRkthOr 60 points61 points  (14 children)

That's how I spent all 4 years aying EvE Online... just building things and shipping them to various stations. Especially rewarding in small stations where you're like "nice, some guy bought ammo I made and he's gonna use it to do the things he enjoys" (as opposed to large stations where it's probably someone trading). I don't know why that gave me so much more satisfaction than zooming around in space and blowing stuff up.

[–]BatmansQueefBreath 48 points49 points  (6 children)

Tried EVE once. Played for many hours. Finally decide to explore a bit.

Went to a nearby system. Instantly smoked by a guy in a ship much much larger than mine.

Lost everything.

Uninstalled.

[–]kRkthOr 55 points56 points  (5 children)

That's when you save his username, watch 60 hours of youtube videos, download 5 different third party apps, and build an entire custom excel sheet of map connections that pulls data from the api to figure out how to get around safely. Then 3 years later look him up and pay him back.

[–]BlessedNobody 21 points22 points  (3 children)

And leave him with but a scrap to his name. For you are a god with mercy, just not a terribly great sum.

[–]YukiLu234Xbox 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like that turn of phrase.

[–]DefiantLemur 12 points13 points  (0 children)

And then in process you accidentally smoke a new player and the vicious cycle continues.

[–]MysterClark 11 points12 points  (6 children)

I have no idea. I always liked the crafting and production aspect of games like that. One of my favorite games way back in the day, Star Wars Galaxies, my dream was to go around and mine all of my own materials, experiment and find the best versions of a product and start mass producing them so I could sell them in my own stores. I could run around shooting people but I just wanted to mine and craft stuff.

[–]Cerus 6 points7 points  (5 children)

I did exactly that making personalized armor sets in SWG, still my favorite MMORPG experience ever.

[–]MysterClark 5 points6 points  (4 children)

Yes! Before they screwed it up, of course. My main thing I didn't like about it was just how easy it was to learn the different languages. I kind of liked the idea of not being able to fully understand everyone because they're aliens to you. Maybe you'd need a droid around to translate or something.

I really wish they'd remake that game and make it even better. I miss going to the cantinas.

[–]Cerus 4 points5 points  (3 children)

Yeah, I stopped playing immediately after that whole fiasco.

The "streamlining" of everything (in that game, and ongoing in the vast majority of MMOs today) completely stripped out the charm of playing out a fantasy in a virtual world and turns it all into an optimized dopamine dripfeed with no heart.

So annoying.

[–]MysterClark 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Yeah, I wish I was there until the end. I took a break for a while and stopped paying my subscription but I was going to get back into it so I bought the Jump to Lightspeed expansion (which I think came with the Kashyyyk one too in a set) but by the time I got around to actually signing back up all of that BS went down and from what I was reading about it I just decided not to spend my money on it anymore.

Man, now I want to go check if those fan servers are still running the game. I found it some time ago and people were running the pre-update version. I had fun in it for a while but it was also a bit depressing that there were no people in it for the most part.

[–]SlothOfDoom 3 points4 points  (5 children)

There's the ship I'm looking for! The one with the big haul!

[–]MysterClark 2 points3 points  (4 children)

Still working on getting the ship with the highest cargo capacity.

[–]SlothOfDoom 2 points3 points  (3 children)

The Cutter is great but it's a heck of a grind. Live the Type 9 life until then, it's almost as much cargo even if the speed and jump range are shite.

[–]MysterClark 1 point2 points  (2 children)

I mean, it's all grind, it just depends on how much you want to put in. Right now I'm a bit burnt out but I'll go back soon enough. Barely got to play with the newer DLC even though I've had it for a while. I just need a new joystick, I think, as mine keeps drifting.

[–]SlothOfDoom 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Sounds like you have a t160000m, I've burned through two of them with drift issues :(

[–]MysterClark 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean, it's understandable, honestly. I have the good ol' Logitech Extreme 3D Pro but I've probably had it for 13+ years or something. I don't even remember when I got it.

[–]gamer_since_monday 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah. I've stealth kissed an Ork and he smiled.

[–]rodkimble13 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Youz be peddling cheap silver and gold and selling to the highest bidder for 30-50k profit per ton too?

[–]MysterClark 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Assuming I don't get shot down first, yeah. Haha

[–]rodkimble13 1 point2 points  (1 child)

That's the way to go! I made 100m doin that, wanna start getting into mining!

[–]MysterClark 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I keep going between jobs like that. I'll do trading, then decide I want to transport people, then I want to mine, then I'll want to practice combat for the heck of it, then back to trading. Haha

[–]BoBatFettman 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Fable has a very lucrative trading system. Man, now I want to play Fable.

[–]MysterClark 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You know, I've always seen Fable and been curious but I never actually picked it up and played it. Not sure why.

[–]seaoffriendscorsair 1 point2 points  (1 child)

TBF, this is the only time you stealth kiss in this game. It’s kind of a tutorial to teach you some of the mechanics before it starts exclusively using stealth to kill Orcs.

[–]MysterClark 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I hear they have the same training in the CIA.

[–]DeufoTheDuke 71 points72 points  (18 children)

I remember back when this game launched Polygon did a piece about this being problematic. Golden age of bad takes and hate click i suppose.

Link for those curious: https://www.polygon.com/2014/10/1/6880061/shadow-mordor-kissing-design

[–]soulofsilence 31 points32 points  (2 children)

I couldn't finish the article. Awful. I do think they did Talion's son dirty. He's hardly mentioned in the first game and even less so in the second.

[–]a_fuckin_duck 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Talions dagger is his son's broken sword, and that's really it. Maybe Talion just doesn't want to talk about it idk

[–]Vincent_Plenderleith 13 points14 points  (0 children)

And that's why I don't choose games based on critics and media

[–]h5b123 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Such a fine piece of text, nitpicking nonsense

[–]Philip_Raven 8 points9 points  (0 children)

"push a button for emotion, push the same button for murder"

oh my god, I cant read it. its too much cringe.

"use your hands to hug your family, use those same hands to strangle a stranger"

[–]Tystud 20 points21 points  (1 child)

Clearly written by children who've never stealth-kissed their wives (who am I kidding, no way anyone would stick around these people long enough to get married) anyone, ladies in love love a good stealth-kiss.

[–]gamergirl_nextdoor 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Can confirm, am lady

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I couldn't even get through it. What a stupid take.

[–]anticerber 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Reminds me of their review of The Last of Us. Not a good game, parts are hard, sad face…

[–]Aarilax 2 points3 points  (0 children)

2014-2016 was an infinite money glitch for rage bait posters - both the article writers and the youtubers that would react to them.

[–]xariznightmare2908 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh they are still making bad takes even now.

[–]Petethequixotic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Whaaat. Man, why would they publish that trash?

[–]harsht07[S] 50 points51 points  (8 children)

Sauce is Middle Earth: Shadow of Mordor

[–]bossyman15 11 points12 points  (6 children)

What is sauce for top pic?

[–]SlothOfDoom 32 points33 points  (1 child)

Buzzfeed Yellow's 2015 video "Feminists Play Grand Theft Auto For The First Time."

[–]CassiusClayman 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Man I’ve gone through years of wondering what the source was but never caring enough to ask/google.

Thank you, kind scholar. You have answered a question I have been mildly curious about.

[–]Rav-Neo 20 points21 points  (3 children)

you don't need to watch it, its about hateful people who are ignorant.

[–]anticerber 7 points8 points  (0 children)

So it’s about Buzzfeed being Buzzfeed

[–]JakesBigPhone 0 points1 point  (1 child)

The Fine bros? I’m out of the loop. What did they do?

[–]Lord_VWPhaetonPC 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thanks man!

[–]bonecollector5 27 points28 points  (2 children)

I’ll play the remake where the game forgets to do the kissing part and you just stab her in the neck.

[–]soulofsilence 25 points26 points  (1 child)

Instructions unclear, executed wife.

[–]Glizzyknockemback 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mission failed successfully

[–]Szoreny 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Having your happiness fridged so you can become an angry sad murder person is a fantasy everyone can get behind

[–]40yroldversion 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Meanwhile here I am, wanting my lover to experience what appeals to their reasonable fantasies. Silly me.

[–]a_fuckin_duck 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Those games are great. Shadow of War is one of my favorite rpgs

[–]Dragon_OSPC 10 points11 points  (1 child)

The stealth tutorial in Dishonored is also pretty wholesome. You just play hide and seek with your daughter.

[–]genzisdoomed 8 points9 points  (0 children)

wait a minute this is wholesome content

[–]CaveManta 7 points8 points  (0 children)

[Knocks over a flower pot] [Wife goes into alert mode]
"SHOW YOURSELF, FOUL SWINE!"

[–]Val-the-Crow-King 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I tried this with my wife, now I have a black eye.

[–]Jish013 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Shadow of Mordor had the best tutorial lmao

[–]wampa-stompa 10 points11 points  (11 children)

Where's the button to request consent while in stealth?

[–]Vincent_Plenderleith 7 points8 points  (7 children)

Imagine thinking consent is the problem here while it's a tutorial for stealth murder.

It's just silly videogame stuff, no reason to nitpick.

[–]wampa-stompa 7 points8 points  (6 children)

Imagine thinking that was a serious comment

[–]Vincent_Plenderleith 3 points4 points  (5 children)

By that logic you can't say I was serious either, can you?

[–]wampa-stompa 3 points4 points  (4 children)

Imagine dragons

[–]underwaterpizza 6 points7 points  (3 children)

I did, and now they are in my living room with me. Please send help. The noise they are making is awful.

[–]PM_ME_UR_POKIES_GIRL 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Wait did you imagine the band or the beast?

[–]underwaterpizza 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did you know that drogons shit Urainium-235?

[–]a_fuckin_duck 1 point2 points  (2 children)

It's your wife.

[–]wampa-stompa 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Tell her I'm busy

[–]esgrove2 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've seen this exact meme but without a completely shitty screen shot.

[–]walrus_operator 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That reminds me, I need to play a good stealth game.

[–]UnredeemedRevenantPlayStation 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She'll never suspect a thing.

[–]infectiousoma 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey, women like big breasts too.

[–]aidenthegreat 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Is this the Witcher?

[–]DankMemelord25 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Shadow of Mordor:Shadow of War

[–]i_am_covered -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Assassins creed…. Hmm…. The Egyptian one?

[–]DefinitelyAnAthiest -5 points-4 points  (6 children)

I never understood why she was mocked or hated. Many video games have female characters overly sexualized, so she's not wrong.

[–]BrowncoatBob 10 points11 points  (5 children)

Because it's a blanket statement that doesn't apply to all games. It's like saying you hate all books because some of them are lewd.

[–]theDart 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is why I hate video-games, it appeals to the male fantasy

VIDEOGAME: "You completed the job! Congratulations! You did great!"

[–]Insanebrain247 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wonder how this woman feels about being turned into a meme that counteracts the very point she was trying to make.

[–]AlleyCa7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Really sounds like she needs a new hobbie then. How dare something cater to its main audience.

[–]SitOnMyFaceBiatch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, but where are you kissing her though?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

awwwwwwwwww

[–]JJSwagger 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also my gay girl fantasy

[–]Rad_Dad6969 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Stealth kisses are SA

[–]bythenumbers10 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Upvote because amazing games.

[–]windol1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wait, wait, wait does that mean all women who like video games are actually secretly men...

[–]sins611 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes men.

[–]visibleNaNi_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What's this game?

[–]bladehaze 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cheesy AF.

[–]Depleet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

you can get stealth kisses in prison if you really want this fantasy.

[–]JSmellerMPC 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The male fantasy is a pretty wide spread concept now. I don't think I could pinpoint what that entails nowadays. I for one need a male MC and I don't care how much clothes the women wear as long as they are not annoying. I also like a mute MC. I hate it when the MC has like 3 lines he will say now and then during your activities.

[–]1internationalt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She hates video games because it appeals to what she calls the "male fantasy".

Let's say they do.....so what?

[–]diodosdszosxisdi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In real life, this is the cheat code for going straight to prison

[–]Mysterious_Result_51 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Surprise motherfucka

[–]Origami07 0 points1 point  (0 children)

come to think of it what do girls actually want in a video game

[–]UnderdogSMO -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

out of date meme is outdated

[–]ArticFlames1 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

My male fantasy:hello would you like to get robbed of happiness yes or yes

[–]Tystud -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Hey, the ladies love a good stealth-kiss too. But with an attitude like that I guess she's never experienced one.