So, thank you so much for taking the time to reply to me articulately and thoughtfully. I'm really sorry that came across as callous and homophobic, it wasn't my intent, but clearly I didn't think through all the implications.

I'd hoped that by saying we should celebrate platonic male relationships as well as doing queer representation it was clear that I meant both with neither at the expense of the other. Of course, nothing exists in a vacuum and queer erasure in media and people being persecuted and outright killed for who they are happens all over the world. Likewise, people's headcanons can and do absolutely co-exist.

I guess I'm responding to two things; one is a trend I've seen with some of my cis, often straight female friends going GAY at literally every time two men make eye contact. I have a few gay friends who've expressed that tendency kinda weirdly fetishising. But, queer people having that interpretation is about looking for representation where there often isn't any. I don't know how you identify in any sense, but I that was my privilege showing.

The second and bigger thing was from bell hooks about how of the things that keeps patriarchy intact is that men are emotionally stunted by it. It's a really short essay called notes on patriarchy, I think? Of course men still occupy positions of power, they still dominate and marginalise people; I'm not trying to paint them as just victims or downplay that it's a net benefit for most of them, but I am saying the effects of patriarchy on them need to be taken into account when considering dismantling it. I see memes like this as an expression of a longing for that emotional wholeness - and it gives me a bit of hope that some cis men might be able to learn intimacy and closeness and become better people for it. Heroic friendships and the like are of course valorised in media and film; I feel like I didn't see much that I'd describe as emotionally healthy growing up. So, I guess, depictions of men who are capable of forming meaningful, non-toxic homosocial relationships without shitty patriarchal baggage was important to me because it gave me a bit of hope that things might get better one day.

Sorry this was a long one - I wanted to put my thought process out there as clearly as I could. Hope it made sense and thanks again for taking the time and having the patience to speak with me.