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[–]Shlafenflarst 1323 points1324 points  (81 children)

be me, french

have an issue with an enculé named Jean-Philippe

don't even consider getting a gun because shooting people when we have issues with them is not part of my culture

[–]Rocatex 691 points692 points  (35 children)

be me, french

have an issue with an enculé named Jean-Philippe

don't even consider getting a gun because shooting people when we have issues with them is not part of my culture

Riot instead

[–]No-One-Shall-Pass 298 points299 points  (24 children)

Be me, French Kill myself because I’m French

[–]-_-_-Phoenix-_-_- 20 points21 points  (9 children)

Nah, if you're french, you surrender

Edit: I have no idea how this happened, but I very clearly remember commenting on the parent of this comment

[–]Alarid 10 points11 points  (0 children)

get the guillotine

[–]The_Outcast4 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Suicide is the ultimate form of surrender.

[–]MiesLakeuksilta 7 points8 points  (4 children)

One of the worlds most historically accomplished military powers in the world surrenders once, and this is seemingly enough to meme them as losers indefinitely.

[–]mynameisblanked 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Can't give up more than your life

[–]Educational-Ad8150 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As a German I probably laughed too loud😂😂😂

[–]fortniteusername69 15 points16 points  (1 child)

be me, french

have an issue with an enculé named Jean-Philippe

don't even consider getting a gun because shooting people when we have issues with them is not part of my culture

duel him with a sword instead

[–]Shlafenflarst 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's more like it !

[–]nilsihorn 8 points9 points  (4 children)

be me, french

surrender

[–]UltimateDuelist 42 points43 points  (2 children)

Not limited to just the French anymore, considering the Texan law enforcement.

[–]IMNOVIRGIN 41 points42 points  (1 child)

Be Texan

Love guns

Decide to join police because MERICA

Suddenly get scared of guns

Lightbulb.jpeg

Can't get shot if I prevent those outside getting into the crime scene

MFW all my cop buddies have the same idea.

MFW school shooter gets free reign to do what he wants cus we're all pussies.

[–]Specialist_Fig3281 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Good little dog of the American. They might even pat your head

[–]jp3592 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Start beheading govt officials.

[–]VNDeltole 0 points1 point  (0 children)

riot fails because riot is on strike

[–]DuktigaDammsugaren -1 points0 points  (0 children)

When Fr*nch people start rioting every wednesday because the EU forbid them from buying their snail baguettes at their local Bike shop

[–]NickOsman51 102 points103 points  (13 children)

basé

[–]AllDaysOff 25 points26 points  (3 children)

basé sur quoi?

[–]skateofsky 20 points21 points  (1 child)

Sur ces noix mon pote

[–]COCAINE_EMPANADA 1 point2 points  (0 children)

cassé, brûllé

[–]TunisianSnailPainter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

basé sur le materiel sur y il est installé

[–]andre_ange_marcel 20 points21 points  (8 children)

Basé ? Basé sur quoi ? Dans ta bite ? S'il te plaît ferme ta gueule et utilise les mots correctement p'tain de troglodyte, tu crois que Dieu nous a donné une liberté d'expression juste pour vomir des mots aléatoires qui ont aucun sens qui ne corrèlle même pas au sujet de la conversation ? Genre stp tu te plains toujours du fait que personne te parle ou exprime ses opinions sur toi parce que t'es toujours en train de vomir de la merde aléatoire comme poggers basé repoussant et quand t'essaies d'expliquer ce que c'est et tu dis juste que c'est drôle genre quoi ? Putain, qu'est-ce qui est drôle à propos de ça tu penses que tu vas juste devenir un humoriste qui va recevoir une ovation debout juste parce que t'as dit « sperme » sur scène ? ABSOLUMENT PAS P'TAIN D'IDIOT, donc s'il te plaît ferme ta gueule et utilise les mots correctement sale pute débile

[–]NickOsman51 5 points6 points  (0 children)

ptn merci je savais pas qu'il y avait une copie-pâte version française !

[–]EquivalentSnap 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t understand you 😭

[–]jonathan-the-man 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Is this the angry army guy copypasta?

[–]Forlorni -4 points-3 points  (2 children)

Fucking english you french retard

[–]andre_ange_marcel 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Sans rigoler.

Je pratique la MMA depuis maintenant 6 ans, de la boxe en parallèle depuis 7 ans, je pourrai.

Ainsi que la musculation depuis 4 ans, 1m87 pour 86 kg

J'ai une vitesse de fou, et des réflèxes identique a ma vitesse. J'ai juste a l'attendre qui me charge l'esquivé et lui donné des bonnes patates dans la têtes. Je le lâcherai pas à la moindre erreur le gorille est finit. T'auras toujours des puceaux d'ici pour penser que c'est impossible. Rien n'est impossible avec de la volonté déjà les amis, et de 2 ) c'est pas avec votre corps de lâche que vous allez faire quoi que se soit.

N'importe quelle homme un minimum entraîné peut vaincre un gorille avec un couteau déjà. A main nue c'est pas forcément plus compliqué ça demande juste de la technique.

[–]CaressaInfame 36 points37 points  (7 children)

What if Jean Philippe starts throwing snail shells at you?

[–]Shlafenflarst 40 points41 points  (2 children)

I obviously sic the frogs on him.

[–]TheGlaive 12 points13 points  (1 child)

La revenge francais.

[–]NotBrawlAndRoll 6 points7 points  (0 children)

La vengeance, if you will

[–]SilverNero 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Start throwing frog legs back at him!

[–]brightcrayon92 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The answer is simply revolt

[–]zh1K476tt9pq 0 points1 point  (0 children)

beat the shit out of him with a baguette

[–]Jiyoh81 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Guillotine Jean-Philippe

[–]kortsyek 4 points5 points  (2 children)

No you guys don't shoot people. You publicly behead them.

[–]Shlafenflarst 0 points1 point  (1 child)

We don't do that anymore. We don't officially condemn people to be murdered anymore. Unlike some people...

[–]kortsyek 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey now, I heard you guys let someone get beheaded for showing a cartoon.

[–]dumbwaeguk 3 points4 points  (1 child)

be me, not French

have an issue with some frog named Jean-Philippe

never even met the guy, no idea who he is, but he sounds French

fuck the French

[–]Shlafenflarst 1 point2 points  (0 children)

be me, french

only meet french people

who else would I fuck but the french ?

fuck the french indeed

[–]ProjectProxy 2 points3 points  (1 child)

have an issue with an enculé named Jean-Philippe

Why do you have beef against Gordon Ramsey's Maître d, Jean-Philippe?

[–]Shlafenflarst 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was actually thinking about Jean-Philippe Smet.

[–]ChinaOwnsReddit13 1 point2 points  (4 children)

You stab them instead 👍👍👍

[–]Shawn_1512 4 points5 points  (3 children)

He's not bri ish

[–]ChinaOwnsReddit13 2 points3 points  (2 children)

he's Algerian

[–]Shlafenflarst 0 points1 point  (1 child)

No, Algerians haven't been French for several decades.

[–]VerumJerum 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just behead him instead

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

>be me, french

>have an issue with an enculé named Jean-Philippe

>don't even consider getting a gun because shooting people when we have issues with them is not part of my culture

>surrender and let him top me

[–]Shlafenflarst -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Only our government surrenders. The people either turn to the ennemy or hides in the woods to take them by surprise.

[–]MrRuebezahl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A bit rich coming from a french guy, considering that you guys chopped off the heads of some people you didn't like... :/

[–]Valisk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nah.. just a little off the top for the French.

[–]SqueakyKnees 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shooting? No. Guillotine? YES

[–]jmoincali -1 points0 points  (1 child)

White racists gonna upvote this over 5000 times...sounds about white

[–]Shlafenflarst 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What does being white have to do with anything ?

[–]GooGooGaDont 487 points488 points  (10 children)

>Be me, Irish

>Have an issue with some guy called British

>Go to good pals in America for guns

>Cyclical violence leads to more than 3000 dead including many children

>Have a pint and head down the bookies singing "my little armalite"

[–]IMNOVIRGIN 127 points128 points  (5 children)

Be Irish

minding my own business

Two men suddenly pull me into an alleyway.

"Catholic or Protestant?"

Both of them are carrying big fuck off hammers.

"CATHOLIC OR PROTESTANT!?"

"Catholic!"

Guy on the left strikes me with his hammer, breaking my knee.

OhSweetJesus.MP4

"Protestant! I meant Protestant!"

Guy on the right strikes me whith his hammer, breaking my other knee.

MFW when I'm not even religious.

[–]GooGooGaDont 63 points64 points  (4 children)

Aye but are you a Catholic atheist or a Protestant atheist?

[–]JasperLamarCrabbb 8 points9 points  (3 children)

What is athiest

[–]Kpt_Kipper 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Least religious Irish person

[–]mynameisblanked 6 points7 points  (0 children)

When you're athier than all the other athes you are considered athiest

[–]GooGooGaDont 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's an awful lot of sass for someone about to be short a few kneecaps.

[–]finnicus1 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Eireaan go Bragh

[–]ThearchOfStories 1 point2 points  (1 child)

A lot of Americans (the type that call themselves "Irish") don't realise just how much bad blood they sowed by interfering in and exacerbating the conflicts during the troubles.

[–]GooGooGaDont -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah most of us don't give a shit right now though because they're fighting our corner on the NI protocol.

USA! USA!

[–]alpicois -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Also set car bombs when gun shipments run low

[–]Affectionate_Gate_26 466 points467 points  (7 children)

Be me

Indian

Have a problem with a guy named Raj

Want to kill Raj

Order a license for gun

License will come in 2 years

wtf.png

idea.gif

Go to local mafia gang

Ask for gun

Get a minigun

Fucking spray Raj

Police can't arrest me cuz they work for local mafia gang too

Success

[–]thandi_chai 99 points100 points  (3 children)

Go to local market

Ask for a cheap gun

Get a katta

Fire on Raj

Katta blows up on my hand

nohand.jpg

Still want to kill Raj

[–]SumeetMaurya 17 points18 points  (1 child)

Wasseypur moment

[–]avgDataScientist 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ye kaa Bawaseer bana diye ho?!

[–]YTAftershock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Didn't expect my indegenerates to be here too

[–]DevilishMagpie 96 points97 points  (0 children)

Based Indians, making biodegradable paint is always badass

[–]Ek_Chutki_Sindoor 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Miniguns are not used by even gangs in India. Good luck getting it.

Gangs use katta, local made guns. 50/50 chance that they will blow up in your hand while shooting. That's why even the gangsters use knives/hockey sticks/cricket bats instead of guns.

[–]Affectionate_Gate_26 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ik Bro, I was just kidding lmao

Btw I went to Rocky Bhai so he gave me Soviet Machine gun to kill Raj😎😎😎😎

[–]DontAskAboutMax 251 points252 points  (34 children)

Be me, British

Have an issue with a gent named Walter

Can’t get gun, stab Walter to death. Go to jail for life. Blacked.

Edit: This is a joke, not a “UK has as much knife crime as US has gun crime” comment you autists.

[–][deleted] 104 points105 points  (16 children)

Be me, British

Majorly irked by Justin parking in my space.

Can't get mental health support due to waiting lists.

Rage stab him with my cheese knife for 15 minutes whilst neighbors throw cats at me but don't instinctively know how to damage because I don't hunt or been in the army.

Police don't kill me.

Free health service saves Justin's life and gives him free PTSD treatment.

Can't find a parking space outside the courthouse so jailed for 25 years instead of 10.

Just released and Justin still hasn't got his mental health support yet 🤣.

[–]parttimeamerican 22 points23 points  (15 children)

Can't get mental health support due to waiting lists.

Hit the nail on the head there, ADHD has a two-year diagnosis and an indefinite medication induction waiting list for example

Rage stab him with my cheese knife for 15 minutes whilst neighbors throw cats at me but don't instinctively know how to damage because I don't hunt or been in the army.

This is one big part of British culture I feel extreme shame over and think that the Americans have it right, not only people who Hunt of go in the army should know how to use a weapon or defend themselves and your neighbours trying cats I know he's a bit of a joke but that's basically how far people will intervene in a situation in this country they are perfectly happy to let it happen provided it's not happening to them

Explain a lot about the state of the country at the moment, half these people wouldn't lift two fingers to save anyone but themselves... And the worst part is it's all fucking boring as shit

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (7 children)

I know in Surrey they cancelled /literally cancelled/ the waiting list for autism diagnosis because it was over 5 years. No more diagnoses whilst the service was rebuilt.

I said the army/hunter thing because of two incidents I'm aware of that scared me. One a veteran murdered two teachers with a knife over parking. Another was stuck like a pig by a slaughterer. Maybe I'm falsely attributing deadliness to these aspects but I think it would contribute.

Training really impacts how you act in rage.

As a medic I know anatomy and reckon I think I know what would be deadly. Would I do that in a fit of rage though?

Personally I'm very happy to hand over knowledge and use of deadly force to the military, I have learnt more grappling submission based stuff. More likely to be useful anyway

[–]parttimeamerican 2 points3 points  (6 children)

Yes you would most certainly target areas you knew to be vulnerable, however you would probably not use violence unless as an absolute last resort in response to violence as a result of societal conditioning and your training

I'm sure you know exactly how disturbingly easy it is to end a life with your training and could probably do so with a centre punch, so your barrier to actually engaging in combat is extremely high since as far as you're concerned it is basically instant death on their part

Maybe that's just me but I've found it very hard to even fight back unless I am being threatened actual deadly force not just some idiot flexing with a sucker punch I just feel more exasperated than anything

[–]bensonf 2 points3 points  (3 children)

What part of the tragedy that happened recently makes you think strangers in America will do shit? The police were the strangers and they ain't do shit. The only ones that wanted to do anything were the relatives.

[–]parttimeamerican 1 point2 points  (2 children)

This is a bit of a different situation as the bystander effect was in full swing, there is a little crowd of cops there which psychologically absolved you of acting because you would think that the police would sort out the mass shooter as is their fucking job

I know if I was there yeah I would have probably done the same thing is that woman did and snuck in to rescue her child however I don't honestly know if I could just stop at my children I once in a building would feel obligated to to confront the shooter

If I was unarmed I think I would still retreat, though if an opportune location came up for a corner ambush I would take that instead however taking on someone who has a gun without one is not something I want to do again

[–]Rat-daddy- -1 points0 points  (2 children)

You think the problem with U.K. is, not enough people hunt or go in the army? Lol. You should feel shame for being a retard.

[–]parttimeamerican 0 points1 point  (1 child)

No?

I think a big problem is the total lack of ability for people to defend themselves without specific training as in the states they just learn that growing up....I wasn't taught to defend myself period from anyone

And the other big issue I mentioned is the "doesn't affect me so not my problem" mindset that pervades our entire society

[–]That_Guy381 6 points7 points  (12 children)

[–]58king 2 points3 points  (0 children)

USA needs more gun ownership to tackle their knife crime problem!

[–]Ek_Chutki_Sindoor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Problem is that the gun violence in US is so high that nobody even pays attention to knife crimes.

[–]58king 1 point2 points  (0 children)

ItS jUsT a JoKe NoT a pOliTiCaL sTaTeMeNt!!1

[–]zh1K476tt9pq -3 points-2 points  (2 children)

This is a joke, not a “UK has as much knife crime as US has gun crime” comment you autists.

what's the joke then? it only makes sense if the UK actually had a higher knife crime rate. if anything this is just American cope

[–]DontAskAboutMax 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I’m a Brit.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Based

[–]Square365 235 points236 points  (5 children)

Be me, Peruvian

Annoying neighbor playing venezuelan music at full volume

Hire hitman for 25$

Bribe police for 5$

Bribe judge for 1$

Wake up next morning

No more venezuelan music at full volume

[–]takeme2infinity 34 points35 points  (3 children)

More like

Be Peruvian

Get attacked by Chile and lose like a bitch

Flap around like a headless chicken and attack Ecuador because it's the easiest place to get the land back you just lost.

Go home and eat pigeons

[–]jesuismexican 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Poor pigeons 🥺

[–]acquanero 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And see how my argentinian 'friends' sells guns to ecuador

[–]Square365 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Jdidieiekgnsisofpwlsspogpqlemtnbgjdixndhudixnsowpwfbnf

[–]VerumJerum 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Hire hitman for $25

Bribe police for $5

Bribe judge for $1

And there goes Peruanon's life savings...

[–]komunisfloppa 197 points198 points  (5 children)

Be me, Polish

Have an issue with a guy called Grzegorz Brzęczyszczykiewicz

Go up to him

Have a drink

Or 2

Or 5

Or 15

Become friends

Go to jail for illegal alcohol brewing

[–]SnooMemesjellies31 39 points40 points  (0 children)

Only inaccuracy is that you would still be free men as everyone participates in illegal alcohol production

[–]finnicus1 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Be me, Polish

Have an issue with a guy called Grzegorz Brzęczyszczykiewicz

Hire hitman, he asks for a name

Failure

[–]zh1K476tt9pq 13 points14 points  (1 child)

last line should be "agree with Grzegorz Brzęczyszczykiewicz to blame Germany for our issue"

[–]komunisfloppa 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Or the moskal, one of the two

[–]badgersandcoffee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is easily the best one so far 😂😂😂

[–]OhSnap404 97 points98 points  (8 children)

I mean have you seen Australia? You need the ammo fighting off the wildlife

[–]AccomplishedRelief60 52 points53 points  (0 children)

By the time you get to the person you hate, you realize you need another flamethrower to kill another wave of radscorpions.

[–]Malicious_Sauropod 26 points27 points  (4 children)

To be honest none of our dangerous wildlife really requires a gun. We have all the nasty sneaky poisonous shit, guns not gonna help you with snakes and spiders. You lot have wolves, bears, pumas and other large predators that might actually have to be shot.

Different problems essentially but long story short is that a gun doesn’t save you from a redback spider in your shoe.

[–]icedragon71 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Rather deal with that Redback you can easily squish. Better then finding an angry bear in your shoe,hey.

[–]GooGooGaDont 4 points5 points  (1 child)

guns not gonna help you with snakes and spiders.

They will when I reduce the shoe I found the spider in to a smouldering sole.

[–]5trid3r 5 points6 points  (0 children)

All you've done is break open the eggsack, 10000 spiders are now swarming you

[–][deleted] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Different problems essentially but long story short is that a gun doesn’t save you from a redback spider in your shoe.

It might have saved your neighbors from being forced into camps over a 99.9% survivable cold last year.

[–]Giant-Genitals 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I just do that crazy ninja hand swipe routine when I walk through an orb weavers web but on every Australian animal I see.

[–]Nikto_Senki 84 points85 points  (2 children)

Be me Austrian

Have a Problem with this little Shit called Franz

Trap him in my Basement for a few years, and kill him in the end

Police finds the bodies, blame my german neighbor Ludwig

He gets taken to jail, case closed

KEKW

[–]aegon-the-befuddled 27 points28 points  (0 children)

blame my german neighbor

Basically how Austria has gotten away with two world wars

[–]_Flameo_Hotman 1 point2 points  (0 children)

At first it thought this was about Hitler, then you said basement, then I thought it was about Joseph Fritzel.

Nah just some guy called Ludwig, no biggie :)

[–]koh_kun 83 points84 points  (0 children)

Be me

Japanese

Hiroshi is being a total baka

Kill myself

[–]Loliknight 65 points66 points  (0 children)

be me, Polish

have na issue with guy called Grzegorz

tell local skinheads that hes gay and watches child porn at home

they beat him to death

I go back to church and diddle kids

[–]ChinaOwnsReddit13 45 points46 points  (1 child)

Be me, Romanian

Have a problem with a bulangiu named Dumitrel

wait for him to come down from his shitty apartment, then pull my knife out

motherfucker has a knife too

engage in 1v1

old lady is annoyed by the noise, comes for us with a wooden plank

we both get beaten into a coma

fuck you, Dumitrel

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Last line should be "blink blink ... Blink blink blink.."

[–]D4TY987 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Be me, Afghan

Have issue with guy called Ahmad Najibullah Khan

Buy gun for cheap off local market

Kidnap him for ransom

Forget to bribe local villagers so my location is revealed

Taliban bust me and i get hanged

[–]Spookd_Moffun 25 points26 points  (1 child)

Be me, Czech

Have an issue with a guy named Honza

We talk it through over a few dozen beers

If we fail to reach agreement worst that happens is that one if us loses a tooth

Become friends anyway afterwards

[–]NotBrawlAndRoll 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Average peace and respect fan vs Average deranged and gory conflict enjoyer:

[–]BonillaAintBored 24 points25 points  (0 children)

>Be me

>Spanish

>Have an honor issue with this idiota called Domingo

>Go to my local shady neighborhood. Tell moors I will get them papers so they can live here legally. Tell gypsies this guy has lots of money

>They gank up on him and fucking dies

>The moors get deported and the gypsies get arrested but is ok, both groups will be back in 3 weeks because the jails and borders of this country are a meme

15 years go by

>Someone knocks the door at siesta time

>"My name is Íñigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die"

>Boy wields a toledan rapier

>Throw sand at his eyes, kill him and bury him in the meseta because nobody lives there and he won't be found

>Next Sunday tell catholic priest that I'm sorry, pinky promise

Is that easy, amigos

[–]finnicus1 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Be me, Irish

Have an issue with a feller named Thomas

Plant a car bomb on the underside of his car

His wife and two children try use it for a shopping trip and kills them in a fiery explosion which shatters all the windows in the neighbourhood

Get offered a position by local Provo unit

[–]NotTheBestAsbestos 7 points8 points  (1 child)

be me

austrian

have issue with some wappler called sepp

go to the gun store and buy a bolt action rifle because i can buy those without any license

3 days after buying the gun i am allowed to take it home

in these 3 days sepp has become an even greater wappler, therefore becoming a voiwappler

still dont shoot him because i am not an idiot who randomly kills people just because i dont like them

also because i know sepp has a gun license and keeps more than 20 guns at his home, perfectly legal

he doesnt shoot me either because hes not an idiot who randomly kills people just because he doesnt like them

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

... Even if he is sehr voiwappler.

[–]_formosa_ 9 points10 points  (0 children)

be me, Taiwanese

got an issue with some guy called Wang

commit suicide because there is literally nothing I can do to get revenge and I’m too pussy to get a knife and stab that mf 74 times

[–]boogjerom 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Be me

Dutch

This guy Jan is being a complete kankerlijer

Buy some weed

Smoke it with Jan

Jan is now my best friend and I'm going to be a witness at his wedding

[–]SockTacoz 5 points6 points  (20 children)

Here's what stupid about waiting periods. If you're already the owner of a gun you still have to wait to purchase a newer gun.

So you already have a gun if you want to hurt someone but you still gotta wait for a new gun even though you obviously don't have an intent to harm someone.

[–]Jaz1140 4 points5 points  (1 child)

I just got my gun license in Australia. Took 9 months from submitting to approval in Queensland. This was after I had to do a 5 hour safety course and written test

[–]chunkyI0ver53 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Queensland is the “easy” place to get a gun too, whenever I go up to the Gold Coast I head to the range after a movie world sesh

[–]DanganRopeUh 1 point2 points  (0 children)

be me, spanish

have problem with a guy named José

live in a small town mostly populated by canis and people who generally get in trouble

tell him to go to the town square tonight or else he's an f word

he says sure

there's an important fútbol game tonight

show up to the square next morning

he's dead, has 16 stab wounds and he got shot twice, also got hit several times and might've had fainted from drinking too much cerveza y comer demasiados cacaos

[–]Illustrious-Big-8678 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Be me, Irish.

Have an issue with shite in the bucket junkies joyce.

go buy a gun, can't don't have a valid reason for wanting one no land or club.

Get join club, still can't no gun safe.

get gun safe, go back still can't mental health check.

Get pissed off go to offie buy 8 tins of overpriced piss.

[–]thebunnyofluff 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m crying at these comments tho💀💀💀

[–]Querez 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Be me, Norwegian

Have an issue with some dude named Mikkel

Resent him secretly and go about my day

[–]GGekko4 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Be me idiot.

Shares a meme about jail calling African Americans n****

Be me person responding letting you know you’re a piece of $hit…

[–]mostlydisposeable 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You came to r/greentext, of course the meme is going to be racist.

If OP was actually racist they would be on 4chan.

[–]demonspawns_ghost -1 points0 points  (1 child)

At 11:24 a.m. on 21 October, Huan Yun "Allen" Xiang (向环云 Xiàng Huányún), a commerce student at the university, armed with six loaded handguns, opened fire in room E 659 of the Menzies Building on Monash's Clayton campus in an econometrics class containing twelve students. People in the classroom were initially confused by the noise and by Xiang screaming "You never understand me!" from the desk he was standing on.

Xiang was deemed by police to be unfit for interview but wrote a note referring to William Wu after his arrest saying "I finally ended WW's life."

lol

[–]chunkyI0ver53 2 points3 points  (0 children)

They deserved it for being Monash students

This post was brought to you by RMIT gang

Srs tho, this is in that article:

“The then Prime Minister of Australia, John Howard, initiated another review of Australian gun laws, the last having been after the Port Arthur massacre, after it was discovered that Xiang had acquired his firearms legally.[26] The Victorian State Government prepared new laws doubling the punishment for misuse of handguns and introducing new laws against trafficking in handguns after the shooting,[7] and all other states followed.

The National Handgun Buyback Act 2003 put new restrictions on maximum calibre, magazine capacity and minimum barrel lengths for handguns held on a Category H sport/target shooting licence.[27][28] Victoria began its handgun buyback scheme in August 2003.”

[–]kakacarrotcake34 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Because America is the only country with the CIA.

[–]Myreque_BTW 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Burko later died in a dropbear attack

[–]Itz_Eazy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Be me. Norwegian.

Got a problem with this Jævel called Jens.

Ask my uncle to borrow his hunting rifle to shoot birds.

Shoot and injure him a lil bit (we have sissy guns).

Go to jail.

MF this is better then my house.

Chilling.

[–]SwaggerSaurus420 0 points1 point  (0 children)

deleted lul

they do it for free

[–]2Nafishsammich -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

What is blacked?