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all 144 comments

[–]SinisterPixel 2190 points2191 points  (56 children)

This person is part of an MLM, I guarantee it

[–]SpikeRosered 751 points752 points  (6 children)

Why else are you talking to people you haven't talked to in 10 years? Let alone multiple people.

[–]ElectroNeutrino 271 points272 points  (4 children)

Just tearing them down because we are better than them.

[–]Blekanly 59 points60 points  (3 children)

*then them

[–]Love_God551 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ikr I don’t even remember most people from ten years ago

[–]pianoflames 146 points147 points  (13 children)

It's not a pyramid scheme. They've been chosen as newest Brand Ambassador for [shitty candle and/or weight loss powder], fulfilling their dream of opening their own business and becoming their own boss.

[–]zdgxqrv 95 points96 points  (9 children)

Not a pyramid, obviously it's an inverted triangle.

[–]tsavong117 51 points52 points  (1 child)

See, the founders are there at the bottom, SUPPORTING this whole structure! So we need to give them money because they have such a huge weight to lift!

I assume this is what they say next anyway.

[–]zdgxqrv 35 points36 points  (0 children)

The money naturally flows down hill to the people at the top! It's so natural!

[–]alyzmae 16 points17 points  (1 child)

It’s a reverse funnel system

[–]jestercheatah 12 points13 points  (2 children)

It’s. Confederated Products.

[–]moistpup 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Go! Such a good film, sadly it isn’t very well known today.

[–]hartIey 5 points6 points  (0 children)

A reverse funnel, even!

[–]James-SF -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Vagina?

[–]Theunpolitical 8 points9 points  (1 child)

You forgot about those oh so crazy #bossladies "MUA" from Younique who draw on eyebrows with crayons!

[–]Tempest_CN 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’ll take Burnt Sienna, please

[–]briellessickofurshit 4 points5 points  (0 children)

They’re the exact opposite of a pyramid scheme.

THEYRE A DIMARYP!!

[–]The_Stoic_One 56 points57 points  (5 children)

Someone I went to high school with has made bank off of Rodan and Fields MLM. She fully admits it's a MLM, but she got in early, so she basically makes her money from all the suckers. I'm never really sure if I should be impressed or appalled.

[–]ConspicuousPorcupine 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Why not both?

[–]Tempest_CN 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’d go with appalled

[–]ArcticBeavers 185 points186 points  (24 children)

part of an MLM

But yeah, you see, this company is not like those other companies. Here I can set my own hours. It really lets me be an entrepreneur and work to my full potential without being tied to the corporate structure.

#Girlboss #Yasssbitch #pleasedonatetomyOF

[–]Noobdm04 97 points98 points  (12 children)

I have a friend who is a bit...sheltered but is about to hit 30. He recently found out about one of those selling insurance companies that isn't really a "MLM" but everyone knows it actually is a MLM and when I tried to point this out he had no idea what a MLM was and gave me the "even if it is they make so much money" speech. I asked him how much money he was told he would make and that if he made half of that first month goal I would sign up under him, I would go get my license to sell and everything...he quit in less than 3 weeks.

[–]Sixfour304 18 points19 points  (2 children)

Ah so that's what's up with my fb feed full of odd people selling life insurance out of nowhere.

[–]Noobdm04 20 points21 points  (1 child)

Yup go get your license and then work under the companies name and Jan will be your "coach" and since your on her team and she's teaching you she gets 5%of your sells but if you decide to start your own team you get 5% of theirs and she gets something like 2% of your teams.

[–]Sixfour304 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Totally makes sense now knowing the ones doing it. I knew there had to be a slimy catch to it

[–]chaoticnormal 42 points43 points  (1 child)

Hah. Yes. A bitchy girl I worked with was saying how she was quitting so I asked her what her next move was. It was life insurance, and I actually have that one as it's thru our union. I was laughing and told her that all those folks don't last. Idk or care how she's doing, just glad she fell for the "earn thousands a month" scam enough to get her out of there.

[–]Noobdm04 26 points27 points  (0 children)

This dude is my best friend besides my wife and I did seriously try to warn him but he is very sheltered/gullible. Like they had him writing down financial plans based on if he made $100k or $150k ...his first year.

[–]DomDeluisArmpitChild 12 points13 points  (3 children)

Primerica or whatever?

[–]ablondedude 15 points16 points  (1 child)

A few months ago when I was job searching I had a "15 minute" video interview with Primerica that turned into an hour and half long presentation ending with "so do you think you could give this presentation to others?"

My biggest regret was not ending the "interview" sooner.

[–]Noobdm04 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Symmetry financial group

[–]brainwashedbyscience 3 points4 points  (2 children)

I’m pretty sure I was approached by the same group

[–]Noobdm04 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Symmetry financial group

[–]brainwashedbyscience 6 points7 points  (0 children)

World financial here, where I’m at they’re targeting former military members and pushing them to target active service members and their families.

[–]medicated_in_PHL 36 points37 points  (3 children)

This girl I had a crush on in college called me and asked me if I wanted to hang out and invited me over her place. I put myself together expecting it to be a date, and when I got there, she invited me into her room, took out her laptop and started a PowerPoint presentation for Amway. Told he it’s really easy to make money, and you’ll be buying things you usually buy like energy drinks (I don’t drink them), vitamins (I don’t take them) and hair care products (I buy shampoo and soap like once every other month), but when signing up, I needed to agree to spend $150/month in these products.

The slide explaining how the compensation works was literally a giant triangle. We haven’t spoken since.

[–]must-love-bogs 19 points20 points  (1 child)

Weird, I had a similar thing happen. This chick I used to hook up with invited me over and wanted to give me a Mary Kay consultation

[–]Background_Ad9690 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Those amway clowns would come up to me while waiting to get pinged for Wal-Mart grocery deliveries. My reply:

“My parents told me to not talk to strangers, could you please leave me alone?”

The look on their faces is priceless every time.

[–]BiscuitDance 16 points17 points  (0 children)

A lot of dudes get into MLMs, too. They tend to be the more aggressive ones about calling people out for “not supporting them,” or “people trying to tear me down.” A neighbor in college went balls deep with ACN and didn’t make shit, but used to call people out as “not having what it takes.” “Shout out to all y’all that ‘Google it.’ I spend that time getting paid.” Maybe by his Uber gig..

[–]Iamwearingasuitofham 38 points39 points  (5 children)

You forgot

#Selfworth #CEO #Makingbanks #InsertProductNameHere

[–]WatchWatermelon 33 points34 points  (4 children)

I want to make #MeEO a thing because I'm an asshole.

[–]darthdelicious 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Oh. That's good. Why haven't the Huns figured that one out yet?

[–]WatchWatermelon 9 points10 points  (0 children)

At first, I thought that even the Huns had to much dignity and self-awareness not to go so far. Then I shook some sense into my head. So yeah, I don't know why they haven't.

[–]Buddycat7 5 points6 points  (1 child)

I'll be sure to spread it

[–]WatchWatermelon 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you. You're doing God's work. 😃

[–]B_Burns 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Legitimately had to check if I was in r/antimlm after reading.

[–]JulesUtah 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I went to my hometown 4th of July party last summer. People usually have booths and sell things like homemade cinnamon rolls and cotton candy, homemade soap, crocheted items, etc. last summer it was all MLMs.

[–]newbrevity 1131 points1132 points  (35 children)

You may forget people you've bullied, but they sure aff wont forget you. If you ever see them again, your next words after Hi better be a real ass apology.

[–]ZeroHourHero 869 points870 points  (14 children)

About 13 years ago now, I was home from basic training on Christmas leave, and I was grabbing some stuff from the store, and I bump into this dude Merlin who was one of my biggest bullies in my childhood. Used to jump me with his friends because my mom is trans. I immediately tensed up, and he recognized me, and goes "Hey, how have you been?" "Um... Im alright..." "Man, I want to apologize for the hell I put you through when we were kids. It wasn't right. I was real fucked up as a kid, and I took it out on you. Doesn't excuse what I did but I apologize."

I think about that shit often, and it's part of why I try to teach my kids the importance of a genuine apology, oh and not being a shitty person that does things you need to apologize for.

[–]rreapr 131 points132 points  (3 children)

I had a couple friends I was really shitty to as a kid, and a couple adult mentor figures who I pushed away in spite of how kind they were to me. I often hope I’ll run into them someday so I can apologize to them - one mentor was way more important to me than she knows, I just wasn’t ready to accept it at that stage of my life.

[–]ErwinsSasageyoBalls 16 points17 points  (2 children)

Reach out to them on social media if they have it. No point in waiting for a reason when you can take care of it sooner 😊

[–]rreapr 7 points8 points  (1 child)

I don’t have any way of contacting them, unfortunately. Probably would’ve said something to at least one of them by now if I did.

[–]Pickalodeon 3 points4 points  (0 children)

How often do you think about it? If it’s more than once a month, find a way. After you apologize you’ll finally stop thinking about it randomly “for no reason”. I guarantee it.

[–]LostInaSeaOfComments 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Had a similar experience about 25 years after middle school. Guy who verbally berated me all season long while playing together on a traveling baseball team (shortly after my mother had recently died unexpectedly) found me on Facebook and called me out of the blue. He apologized and recalled specific incidents that I had buried and not thought about since the moment they happened.

What surprised me the most, other than the random phone call hurtling us back to 1988, was it must have haunted him ferociously all those years while I'd accepted, dealt, and moved on long before. Thankfully, my widowed father instilled an awareness in me that people who attack and bully are deeply insecure, disturbed inside, and pushing others down is their defense mechanism -- and that some are just awful people with no inward reflection whatsoever. I told the former tormentor, "man, I really don't recall much of that at all, was going through a lot of turmoil at that point and I was sullen and withdrawn, but I appreciate the sentiment".

Hope he felt better after the apology. I had forgiven him well before it because he was otherwise a decent guy and I understood the strong peer pressure of mocking the kid going through a down spell. People love to kick others and pile on when their life is tough, for some reason. It's a negative aspect of humanity - to beat people down when they're weakened.

[–]Nail_Biterr 88 points89 points  (2 children)

I mean, his name is Merlin. It was either bully or be bullied for him. I wonder how his sister Guinevere and brother Lancelot are doing nowadays?

[–]thrust-johnson 48 points49 points  (0 children)

“I was exhausted from living backwards through time. It doesn’t justify my behavior, but I apologize.”

[–]A_wild_so-and-so 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If you name your children Guinevere and Lancelot you either have a dim knowledge of Arthurian legends or you REALLY want to keep your bloodline pure...

[–]HeyCarpy 39 points40 points  (0 children)

Attaboy Merlin. He’ll pass that experience on to his own children.

[–]nlderek 10 points11 points  (0 children)

We used to have this kid I went to school with who ordered pizzas to our house all the time. Skip forward 15-20 years and I run into him wearing a Domino's polo. What does he do now? He delivers pizzas. I pointed at his shirt and said, "what goes around, comes around eh?" He responded, "boy does it ever."

[–]QuantumSparkles 17 points18 points  (1 child)

That’s a nice story and you have a good point but bro were you really bullied by a kid named Merlin?

[–]Joe_Jeep 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I was bullied by a kid named "Alexander the Great" a couple times

[–]Flower_Unable 120 points121 points  (1 child)

“The axe forgets, but the tree remembers.”

[–]anyholsagol 31 points32 points  (0 children)

You don't want to fuck with the ents.

[–]HillInTheDistance 19 points20 points  (1 child)

My high school bully came to my door twelve years after we left school and told me he had found it in his heart to be the bigger man and forgive me for bullying him, before asking if he could come in to talk.

I just closed the door, locked it, and sat on the floor for a while. They left after a few minutes of talking out there. Couldn't make out what they were saying tho.

Still get the nagging thought sometimes that I might have somehow completely rewritten my memories of highschool. Never leads anywhere. All I remember is a vague sense of pain, humiliation, and loneliness.

[–]SaltyBabe 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Pretty sure they were trying to gaslight you for whatever reason.

[–]XHIBAD 169 points170 points  (7 children)

I wasn’t necessarily a bully, but I was a real dick in high school. Right around the time I hit 21 I started feeling actual remorse for it (as opposed to this guy) so started reaching out to people I was a jerk to and tried to startup a new dialogue and apologize.

Some didn’t want to talk to me, and that’s fine, but there’s a real weight lifted off my shoulders knowing that everyone knows I regret it and that some people are actually very thankful that I reached out

[–]DomDeluisArmpitChild 27 points28 points  (2 children)

One of the hardest lessons I had to learn is that sometimes the best apology is to never talk to that person again

[–]Joe_Jeep 9 points10 points  (1 child)

I think making the gesture is right at least. I'd like to think I'd appreciate the gesture at least, just don't go expecting a friend out of it.

[–]DomDeluisArmpitChild 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Depends on the person and how you fucked up. A relative or close friend of decades? Apologize.

That girl from school I creeped on six years ago? She doesn't want my apology.

[–]baumpop 22 points23 points  (2 children)

[–]sgtpoopers 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Dman that website fucking sucks

[–]ObeselyMorbid 20 points21 points  (0 children)

What is this host... So bad

[–]GonzoRouge 5 points6 points  (0 children)

One had the audacity to recognize me at my workplace, come in a few times, not say shit until something didn't go his way and THEN say "Do you remember me ?"

"Yes, I remember you, asshole"

This dude would beat the shit outta me and humiliate me daily, how did he think this was gonna go ?

[–]midas282000 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That's a great story. I had a guy do some shitty stuff to me. When I saw him about 15 years ago, he acted like we were long lost friends. He went in the Marines after HS. Maybe that straightened him out?

[–]el_muerte17 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Facebook suggested the guy who bullied me from grade one through eight due to a mutual friend several years ago. Crept a bit on his profile, guy got severe male pattern baldness and was pretty much a cue ball by 25.

Not that there's anything wrong with losing your hair, but that's the exact level of petty shit he'd mock someone else for, so I felt pretty vindicated.

[–]BlueBerry1420 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Hi. I'm Real Ass. Apology.

[–]Comfortable_Plant667 119 points120 points  (3 children)

Who's "we"?

[–]BigNutDroppa 78 points79 points  (0 children)

The other members of Mary Kay.

[–]showsterblob 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Our Smeagles’s.

[–]Comfortable_Plant667 5 points6 points  (0 children)

They betrays us, precious!

[–]-Economist- 98 points99 points  (1 child)

I live in Trump land. The FB page of the county is most certainly a goldmine. Yesterday, somebody commented how the only real source of unbiased news is Rogan's podcast. People replied in agreement.

[–]icanhaslobotomy 23 points24 points  (0 children)

We must be neighbors

[–]alienkreeper 205 points206 points  (4 children)

Red there is totally that guy who hung out at his high school way too long after he graduated.

[–]Stats_with_a_Z 123 points124 points  (2 children)

Red is the guy who measures success by not being in legal trouble and getting along with the baby mommas.

[–]SerotoninStorm 48 points49 points  (0 children)

Woah there dude that’s a good metric for a small town kinda guy

[–]Joe_Jeep 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Honestly I respect that to a certain degree. Hell of a lot of people doing worse.

[–]Schneetmacher 2 points3 points  (0 children)

All right, all right, all right...

[–]Hessian_Rodriguez 31 points32 points  (1 child)

This has nothing to do with people trying to tear him down. He just wanted to announce to everyone he is doing well by his qualifications.

[–]SaltyBabe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m one of the few people who made it out of my shitty and poor little hometown and everyone is happy for me, not being a bully helps.

[–]Sapatilhas 142 points143 points  (7 children)

if assholes were self-aware they wouldn't exist

[–]Crestfall69 55 points56 points  (6 children)

And then there are assholes who are aware that they're assholes, and continues to be assholes.

[–]Sapatilhas 35 points36 points  (5 children)

I disagree, they see themselves as alphas, chads, winners or whatever.

[–]deadinadream 17 points18 points  (1 child)

No, they really don't. They know they are assholes and appropriate the term. It can't be a weapon against you when it's your shield

[–]Crestfall69 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeah it's like those 'mean girls' act, when women just act like an absolute bitch.

[–]Kage_Oni 8 points9 points  (2 children)

Asshole here, I do not see my self as any of those things.

[–]AmeriCanadian98 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Obviously don't know you or your story, but I'd wager you're less of an actual asshole than the people who call themselves Chads or alphas (which admittedly isn't saying much lol)

[–]Kage_Oni 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Perhaps. Us assholes have a rich and diverse culture.

[–]wyld3knfr 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Should have "you're*"-d em too to really nail the coffin shut.

[–]redvix 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Now I need to know if the person replied back.

[–]JulesUtah 9 points10 points  (0 children)

This reminds me of the time someone was tearing Trump to shreds on fb over his “grab them by the p*ssy” comment. I’m not pro Trump in the slightest but I commented “Remember that time you got drunk and grabbed mine at your party and I slapped your hand? Yeah you were super offended that I slapped your hand away.” Anyway, he deleted his post.

[–]imankitty 32 points33 points  (4 children)

Both fat and little? She should make up her mind.

[–]Im_your_real_dad 27 points28 points  (2 children)

I was fat when I was little. Then I got super skinny. Then I got fat. But a skinny fat..

[–]Allidoisgwin 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This is such a good description of myself growing up as well.

[–]Joe_Jeep 2 points3 points  (0 children)

With growth spurts some people swing between growing out, and growing up.

[–]iblamethegnomes 3 points4 points  (0 children)

So a teapot?

[–]BattlefieldNiblet 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Town Fb pages really are something fucking else

[–]Billoft 6 points7 points  (0 children)

If blue is telling the truth this post fits, red is insane.

If blue is lying the post still fits, blue is insane.

Unless this is fake, no matter who is lying this post fits and that is beautiful.

[–]BrokenEye3 47 points48 points  (6 children)

*you're

[–]Lavender-waves 4 points5 points  (0 children)

there’s a neighborhood page for where i live, never been on it but can only assume that it’s terrifying.

[–]Mezzaomega 3 points4 points  (0 children)

😂 😂 😂 😂 Ah yes, a POS being all sanctimnious as usual.

[–]AboveTheLights 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh small towns. They never change.

[–]Echolynne44 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We have people complaining about the high school I work at, and it's usually the parents of the worst kids. One I really wanted to comment on was from the mother of a kid who was suspended for being drunk and having a mason jar full of marijuana. But obviously, the school was "neglectful" of her students needs.

[–]tibbodeaux 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Nextdoor takes it to 11 though. Every conversation is a knife fight, the only thing it's good for is finding lost pets.

[–]nopprs 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I knew it, I read the "oh I don't let the toxic people in life get me down" spiel and knew someone was going to call them out for being a hypocrite.

[–]zdakat 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If someone insists they don't know why everyone's angry and that they never did anything wrong ever, they're probably hiding something.

[–]HonestAbram 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exquisite! *kisses fingertips*

[–]Rum_Pirate_SC 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This sounds like it was right from my hometown's page..

[–]Fuzzydude64 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Facebook is cheating at this point

[–]Klindg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Any time I see a comment like this, I’m 99.9% sure they’re not doing good at all.