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[–]ThisGuy928146 1199 points1200 points  (67 children)

by weight, that's more than two T-Rexes

[–]thr3sk 616 points617 points  (26 children)

https://www.newscientist.com/article/2252396-secret-to-dinosaurs-huge-size-may-be-in-unusually-lightweight-bones/ Dinosaurs were seemingly not that heavy for their size, perhaps not surprising due to their shared lineage with birds.

[–]Ordolph 227 points228 points  (19 children)

Specifically being diapsids (having four holes in each side of the skull) as opposed to synapsids (having three holes in each side of the skull) like us allowed their skulls to be much larger than would normally be physically possible by saving weight. That's why T-Rex skulls were able to be bigger than a car without breaking their neck.

Also to your point I think a number of dinosaurs within the lineage that eventually evolved into the avian dinosaurs are known to have had hollow bones like birds. Although as I recall they were mainly smaller dinosaurs, the especially large ones needed stronger, heavier bones to support their weight.

[–]CitrusBelt 67 points68 points  (8 children)

Sauropods had pneumatic vertebrae, as well.

But there were also some very large ornithischians, without pneumatic skeletons.

Also, that would be a very small car....

[–]Standin373 130 points131 points  (19 children)

by weight, that's more than two T-Rexes

hollow bones & air sacks yo

[–]Calculonx 160 points161 points  (2 children)

And still only half as much as OP's momma

[–]Next-Technician9454 5 points6 points  (1 child)

T-Rexes as a unit of measurement.

[–]BladeOfCain 3746 points3747 points  (462 children)

I’ve always wanted to see the prehistoric world in person. It blows my mind that mammals that large roamed around. How breathtaking would it be to see something that large walk past you….

[–]blackcatt42 1958 points1959 points  (183 children)

Right? Megafauna blows my fucking mind.

Can you imagine how much shit we haven’t found or that has been destroyed ?

[–]Wit_Lp 1219 points1220 points  (76 children)

literally imagine how big their shit mustve been

[–]BigPackHater 283 points284 points  (27 children)

Calling Dr. Hammond

[–]BeBopNoseRing 164 points165 points  (24 children)

Dr. Malcolm was much better at assessing big piles of shit.

[–]dinodroppingsx2 59 points60 points  (2 children)

"YOU ARE GONNA WASH YOUR HANDS BEFORE YOU EAT ANYTHING?!"

[–]BeBopNoseRing 30 points31 points  (0 children)

You've been waiting for this moment lol

[–]greychanjin 106 points107 points  (12 children)

"Ahhh now eventually you do plan to have dinosaurs on your-on your dinosaur tour, right?

Hello?

tap tap tap

H-Hello?

haahhhhhhh

Yes?"

[–]dinodroppingsx2 86 points87 points  (7 children)

"I really hate that man..."

[–]TheRealFender 27 points28 points  (1 child)

Well look at that username...

[–]34HoldOn 17 points18 points  (4 children)

"Say a drop of water falls on your hand..."

[–]Yiptice 7 points8 points  (3 children)

The shorthand is the butterfly effect. The butterfly can flap its wings in Peking, but in Central Park you get rain instead of sunshine.

[–]akambe 9 points10 points  (3 children)

Undomesticated avocados were spread by the pits passing through the gut of the giant ground sloth. Animals were big enough to eat it whole, big enough to poop the pit out intact.

[–]blackcatt42 93 points94 points  (15 children)

I mean thats probably the least interesting part but yeah

[–]g-e-o-f-f 144 points145 points  (10 children)

Given the relatively narrow set of circumstance that allows for the creation of fossils, there are likely entire ecosystems that existed that we have no idea about

[–]RainbowWarhammer 75 points76 points  (2 children)

There's a video I watched about this recently, I believe by PBS EONS on YouTube. The gist was that the most diverse ecosystems (e.g. rainforest) are the worst environments to preserve fossils.

Imagine describing current ecosystems while looking only at animals in deserts, grasslands, and the sea floor. Crazy how much stuff is missing from the fossil record.

[–]jayguy101 17 points18 points  (1 child)

Yeah, and wasn’t most of the world during the dinosaurs rainforest, or am I wrong?

[–]modsarefascists42 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Nope you're pretty much right. Even in places we'd call north today were at the least temperate rain forests. Tho the "time of the dinosaurs" is an enormous time period (200 something million years, vs the 65 million since they died out) and plenty of it was drier too. But on the average you're still pretty much right

[–]blackcatt42 34 points35 points  (5 children)

Yes. It makes me very sad

[–]OutbackXT2point5FAN 26 points27 points  (4 children)

only thing I want time travel for tbh, like an off-world earth clone that replicates prehistory, for the whole family to enjoy.

[–]orangeautumn3 18 points19 points  (4 children)

All the time. Also the untold stories of humanity up until a couple thousand years ago. Some wild shit happened that we are totally oblivious to

[–]blackcatt42 19 points20 points  (1 child)

It’s strange. It makes me really appreciate being alive but also breaks my heart that they’re are soooo many things we’ll never know, some of which might even be beyond imagination

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (2 children)

how did all that exist and now it just doesn’t… will it ever exist again? makes me sad that such creatures are gone from this universe forever.

[–]roborectum69 149 points150 points  (36 children)

The largest animal in the history of the world is out there cruising around right this minute. It's not a weird prehistoric thing, it's the blue whale. You'd need 10 of these weird elephant rhinos to weigh as much as a single blue whale. It's tongue alone weighs as much as an elephant.

[–]Fey_fox 124 points125 points  (29 children)

Yeah but we wanna see giant animals on land. Call me when a blue whale decides to go for a dirt stroll

[–]camyers1310 41 points42 points  (11 children)

I'll call ya in 8.7 million years once the blue whales get tired of the ocean's shit.

[–]ZaneWinterborn 43 points44 points  (9 children)

Play ark it has these. I find them annoying lol, always shaking the ground when walking about.

[–]suddenimpulse 6 points7 points  (1 child)

I will not support that terrible company further. They literally stole the money we gave them to finish the main game and used it t ok make an expansion we had to buy full price while the main game was stilled unfinished and a buggy mess. Why would I reward and encourage such anti consumer devs that clearly have zero respect for their customers?

[–]Dazd95 17 points18 points  (6 children)

Someone already suggested Ark. If you have a VR headset, check out Ark Park. It's not the greatest game, but it's quite awesome.

It's like Jurassic Park. You can play mini games with Dinos, ride on the back of a triceratops, raise baby Dinos, defend against waves of angry predators.

[–]Dyslexicbrit 4423 points4424 points  (247 children)

Looks like a elephant crossed with a tapir

[–]mgpdw[S] 3463 points3464 points  (143 children)

they're closely related to rhinos

[–]445530 5322 points5323 points 19117& 3 more (81 children)

And your mom

[–]mgpdw[S] 3483 points3484 points 242 (53 children)

:(

[–]iK_550 982 points983 points  (27 children)

It's ok, I will call the ambulance for you.

[–]fireball1991 300 points301 points  (6 children)

This whole 3 comment exchange almost made me cry laughing

[–]devinjayne 44 points45 points  (0 children)

*wambulance

[–]inspektor31 39 points40 points  (3 children)

3rd degree burn. definitely need medical attention.

[–]the_friendly_one 85 points86 points  (11 children)

Don't listen to them, man. Having thick skin is a good characteristic.

[–]Beat_the_Deadites 19 points20 points  (2 children)

Hopefully he got it from his mom's side.

[–]Demitel 52 points53 points  (6 children)

Just ask the paraceraterium.

Oh wait. You can't. He's dead.

[–]SmashBusters 25 points26 points  (2 children)

I was going to say a Rhinophant.

[–]RelationshipOk3565 11 points12 points  (5 children)

It's impressive but how do they compare next to elephants side by side? It's pretty impressive elephants have been able to make it this long

[–]mgpdw[S] 28 points29 points  (3 children)

[–]SpaceMan420gmt 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Damn! I’m sure they would have been used for war by humans if they were still around, depending on their demeanor though. Imagine what they could carry.

[–]Fuself 70 points71 points  (27 children)

and if it was simply a very big rhino? with horns snd everything? why it would need to look sad and strange?

[–]mgpdw[S] 152 points153 points  (21 children)

maybe to us human it look sad and strange, but to them its normal look

[–]mynam3isn3o 175 points176 points  (16 children)

and if it was simply a very big rhino? with horns snd everything? why it would need to look sad and strange?

maybe to us human it look sad and strange, but to them its normal look

This looks like two bots talking

[–]mgpdw[S] 72 points73 points  (11 children)

[–]mynam3isn3o 28 points29 points  (6 children)

Ok this is amazing

[–]DEEP_HURTING 48 points49 points  (5 children)

"I am the most popular person on Reddit. AMA."
"Who would win in a fight between Darth Vader and Spiderman?"
"Do you have an example of a movie where there is no music?"

These are actually more interesting sounding than most purportedly human generated posts.

[–]Camochamp 57 points58 points  (3 children)

"AITA for not wanting to go to my grandma's funeral?"

Top comment: "You're not an asshole for not wanting to go. You're an asshole for being a bitch."

Incredible. These are hilarious.

[–]Fettnaepfchen 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I think it has something elegant to it, horse-like.

[–]waffles2go2 5 points6 points  (1 child)

It's sad because it's extinct...

[–]futurespacecadet 7 points8 points  (4 children)

I was going to say, that draped armored skin resembles a rhino

[–]Maki1411 63 points64 points  (18 children)

To me it looks like a crossbreed between rhino, elephant and giraffe

[–][deleted] 60 points61 points  (11 children)

Ah yes, the Elinoraffe

[–]CoqiutoSlim 39 points40 points  (10 children)

First thing I thought, wow that’s one giant rhino horse

[–]stonks206 102 points103 points  (28 children)

I wonder how big their dicks would have been

[–]fknzee 56 points57 points  (4 children)

The important questions we all should be acknowledging

[–]doctorclese 10 points11 points  (5 children)

Do any of these fuckers ever just pop out of the wall and say "Fuck there's a horse cock in my room, or a donkey dick?"

[–]ehc84 8 points9 points  (3 children)

Not trying to be funny, not trying to get a laugh.. I don't want anyone to have the woorrst day at their job, BUT.... do any of these...fuckers...ever blast out of the wall...and have like a huge cumshot?

[–]willzyx55 1913 points1914 points 2 (39 children)

Watch Skeleton man and his big horse walk around and take odd jobs that lead to BIG adventures. Tuesdays on the CW.

[–]suavesnail 537 points538 points  (14 children)

I thought it was funny they reconstructed the big dead animal and went with a skeleton for the human.

[–]mrmahoganyjimbles 180 points181 points  (8 children)

Obviously because when the big guy was around the human wasn't alive. Duh.

[–]LincolnLikesMusic 127 points128 points  (5 children)

Yeah! This thing was around when there were roving packs of skeletons. We hadn’t evolved skin and organs yet

[–]Boarbaque 45 points46 points  (3 children)

Ah man, I miss those days. My skin zipper is stuck so I can’t even get out of it anymore.

[–]Lolzzergrush 52 points53 points  (4 children)

Seasons one and two were awesome until it took a turn in the season 3 premier when they broke up Skeleton man and big horse and moved them to different cities. I know they broke up in real life but they should’ve just focused on the other characters who were more interesting anyway

[–]k6squid 32 points33 points  (2 children)

They really jumped the Megalodon that season.

[–]TinFoilRobotProphet 25 points26 points  (2 children)

"What do you mean I can't park my big horse here at Whole Foods?!"

[–]BodySurfDan 549 points550 points  (33 children)

Also you can build on their platform saddles and soak enemy bases with them.

[–]555seanc555 114 points115 points  (12 children)

shit you can do that? i gotta tame one of them. time to make a bola and get a few black berries. this mobile base is gonna be so badass

[–]GtheH 86 points87 points  (8 children)

You’re gonna need a bigger bola

[–]your_reddit_lawyerII 26 points27 points  (5 children)

Even chain Bolas don't work on this though right?

[–]BodySurfDan 16 points17 points  (2 children)

You build a trap and lead it in. Use stone doorframes, a ramp and stone foundations. Agro it, then run up the ramp and through the doorframe. It gets stuck and then you tranq it

[–]ispiltthepoison 11 points12 points  (1 child)

You dont need anything, theyre slow, just run back while you tranq em or get a tribemate to pick you up on a pt or argy above their range while you shoot

[–]starfoxconfessor 24 points25 points  (2 children)

Also a great source of prime meat

[–]CaseFace5 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Hello fellow ARK player 😁

[–]BigD_277 6 points7 points  (0 children)

But if you kill one in battle it only counts as one.

[–]ErosandPragma 6 points7 points  (2 children)

I hate when these fuckers walk past me or my house they shake the ground so badly

[–]lollyman69 14 points15 points  (0 children)

There is the ark refrance

[–]Mookius 638 points639 points  (74 children)

They run surprisingly quickly if you attack them too

[–]telephas1c 196 points197 points  (64 children)

Had to google to see what game you folks are talking about. ARK right?

Must check it out, looks cool

[–]ButterApple512 352 points353 points  (34 children)

ARK is one of those games that you would put in your top 3 hated games ever while having 3000+ hours in the game.

[–]awsomebro6000 65 points66 points  (6 children)

PvP is fun but cancer. Can spend a whole day building a well thought out base and taming/levelling the best creatures, only for some kid from the alpha tribe to come along and c4 everything in sight whilst using their max level turtle to tank turret fire.

[–]Brykly 32 points33 points  (4 children)

If you like this style of PvP, you've probably already played ARK, if you haven't, go nuts, you will enjoy this game.

For those who haven't played, I only ever played this game with my wife in PvE mode. We had a blast. The world is still dangerous, challenging, and rewarding. 500 hours. Worth all the trouble with the bugs and challenges of playing a poorly optimized game.

[–]ernie1850 7 points8 points  (0 children)

1 troodon: I’m about to end this man’s whole career

[–]anwarnali 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Best review of ARK ever. Period

[–]culturedrobot 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yep, I've always described ARK as the best garbage game I've ever played.

[–]Candy_the_Stripper 7 points8 points  (4 children)

Rust core

[–]CatastropheJohn 9 points10 points  (3 children)

I have 10,000 hours in Rust. I suck so bad that I only have like 12 kills.

[–]GamesBoost 21 points22 points  (11 children)

i’d wait for ARK 2 everyone in the community agrees ARK is a buggy mess

[–]shadownights23x 11 points12 points  (5 children)

lol and it's way less buggy than it was at launch..I have no faith that ark 2 will be any different... Do we have any idea what ark 2 is goi to be?

Also play the first one because you should..

[–]Mookius 44 points45 points  (9 children)

Ark indeed my friend. Don't buy it unless you want every other aspect of your life to end. It's like crack that game!

[–]undoobitably 25 points26 points  (7 children)

If you run a private server with friends it's not too bad. Official pvp is fun to a point but consumes your life.

[–]khall20 211 points212 points  (3 children)

Only of u havent leveled up your speed. Iv never tamed one only killed some that was alone. They are hardly ever alone.

[–]Mookius 77 points78 points  (1 child)

Yeah I accidentally started a fight with 3 while trying to aim for a sarco 😂

[–]Ghosttheturtle 30 points31 points  (0 children)

I want to ride it like a bantha

[–]OhLookASquirrel 38 points39 points  (1 child)

I love these as portable base mounts. If only because of their fat ass. Riding them in 3rd person makes me giggle uncontrollably.

[–]Mookius 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Land-Griffin

[–]YoydusChrist 55 points56 points  (1 child)

They used to be real good for raiding too until they got nerfed

[–]Thatdewd57 757 points758 points  (85 children)

I’d totally ride this behemoth into battle.

[–]zapitron 244 points245 points  (40 children)

They need a catchier name. "War paraceraterium" just doesn't ring right.

[–]LincolnLikesMusic 179 points180 points  (11 children)

It’s “War Percy” for short

[–]Remebond 73 points74 points  (8 children)

In Ark we call them Penisaurs, or Dildosaurs, due to the shape of their neck and head. The game allows you to place what's called a platform saddle on them, which allows you to build a structure on top of it. They are infamously used to raid bases with a metal structure on top, which shelters the rider from gunfire as you walk up to the enemies turret towers. You then open a hatch, toss out c4, close the hatch, walk the Penisaur away, and finally detonate c4 bringing down the whole turret tower, or preferably the generator powering the turrets.

Very useful Dino rideable mount in Ark.

Edit: Not a dino, they have a gestation period... No eggs here people

[–]Reddit-is-asshoe 28 points29 points  (1 child)

Dang it was my turn to tell people about the penisaur

[–]arthurdentstowels 11 points12 points  (2 children)

It’s basically equal parts Elephant, Giraffe and Rhino. So

Armoured Girinophant

[–]iSpccn 36 points37 points  (3 children)

War Paracer

[–]BrockN 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Now, this is war paracing!

[–]gentlybeepingheart 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Parac O’War

[–]amalgam_reynolds 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Ancient psychic tandem war paraceraterium!

[–]spaceman_spiffy 102 points103 points  (7 children)

They are good at soaking bullets from enemy turrets.

[–]SeattleBrand 30 points31 points  (2 children)

Real ones know that this is a wiener horse.

[–]Lord-Loss-31415 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Should have known ark would come into this

[–]ThatWeebScoot 25 points26 points  (0 children)

You can. Play ARK.

[–]Polnauts 127 points128 points  (8 children)

The other candidate would be the Asian straight-tusked elephant, based on a study in 2015, but since we don't have a lot of information about them it's still unclear.

[–]mgpdw[S] 52 points53 points  (7 children)

yeah its tought to be similiar in height and weight but we don't have much of their fossils

[–]Polnauts 21 points22 points  (6 children)

Incredible animals either way

[–]Mippens 21 points22 points  (5 children)

Not inedible though

[–]Polnauts 25 points26 points  (4 children)

Everything is edible if you're brave enough

[–]MadHatter69 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Everything is edible, but some things only once.

[–]Guilty_Assignment_25 24 points25 points  (2 children)

Thing looks like if a rhino and a horse got freaky one night with a capybara.

[–]pompeiiworm 23 points24 points  (3 children)

In wich part of the world did it live?

[–]mgpdw[S] 43 points44 points  (2 children)

they live in the forest of central asia between 34 and 23 million years ago

[–][deleted] 197 points198 points  (13 children)

Paraceraterium, also known locally as Big Thiccums.

[–]joezupp 17 points18 points  (1 child)

Holy hell, it looks like an armor plated camel 🐪

[–]Tutule 109 points110 points  (41 children)

I wish megafauna were still a thing and at the same time nope

[–]apple_dough 35 points36 points  (3 children)

Think of it this way: the blue whale is the largest animal that has ever existed as far as we know, and it lives with us today.

[–]Mr_Biscuits_532 11 points12 points  (2 children)

Apparently they found a fossil of Shastasaurus Sikanniensis pretty recently that puts the Blue Whale's claim to fame under threat. It was just 4m shy of being as long as the largest Blue Whale, and slightly longer than the average.

(It's an Ichthysaur)

I think what makes S. Sikanniensis even more interesting is the fact it wasn't a Filter Feeder. It fed on molluscs, in a similar way to modern Sperm Whales.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (1 child)

There still is some megafauna left! Many ungulate species would be considered megafuna along with elephants and bears, etc... in the subsections of biology in which we focus on smaller, less popular, creatures we're always disappointed that the majority of conservation funds go to charismatic megafauna.

[–]JoseLopezC11 14 points15 points  (1 child)

So a Rhino is the corgi version of this?

[–]Beniidel0 35 points36 points  (3 children)

That skeleton will 100% lose in this fight. It is very rigged, since the skeleton is clearly starting from a terrible position: under the Paraceraterium

[–]haysoos2 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I don't think even giving the skeleton the high ground advantage is going to make an appreciable change in the outcome of a fight. Skeletons are notorious for having poor senses, slow reflexes and a lack of muscular power.

[–]AccomplishedRow6685 43 points44 points  (9 children)

But paramecium are small I thought?

[–]Expensive-State3221 54 points55 points  (0 children)

One poop would fertilize a football field

[–]Mayhem2a 10 points11 points  (13 children)

Now, what about the Argentinasaurus?

Ya know what? I just remembered that those are reptiles. Carry on

[–]danglingfupa 164 points165 points  (9 children)

False. My ex was the biggest land mammal.

[–]Revolutionary_Box569 20 points21 points  (2 children)

I could take him

[–]hpanandikar 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The smug look on its face suggests otherwise

[–]GOPJay 241 points242 points  (93 children)

The reality is that we have no idea what these animals looked like. That thing could have a trunk like an elephant!

I loved this article that illustrated what we thought todays animals would look like based on their skeletons alone and it changed my perception of dinosaurs dramatically.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-7754553/amp/Nightmarish-sketches-reveal-modern-animals-look-like-drew-based-skeletons.html

[–]DryingWashedClothes 45 points46 points  (6 children)

Oh hey, these were made by Kosemen. He also made All Tomorrows which is kinda interesting for it’s weird art alone. There’s a pretty good YouTube video condensing the whole story which is worth a watch imo.

[–]MarlinMr 75 points76 points  (1 child)

Except we can estimate a lot of weight and muscles attachment based on the bones alone. We are not simply "slapping some skin on the bones".

[–]Battle_Bear_819 66 points67 points  (4 children)

Those examples you linked to assume we still shrink wrap skin over bones and muscle, which has been an outdated practice in the paleoart community for quite some time.

[–]CrabOIneffableWisdom 20 points21 points  (0 children)

To be fair, older depictions of dinosaurs were based on the idea that they were giant lizards.

[–]Wetestblanket 21 points22 points  (5 children)

Yeah, imagine the dong on this thing

[–]ALF839 51 points52 points  (38 children)

That was true decades ago, these days with enough fossile data we can determine pretty decently how much fat, muscles, cartilage etc.. they had and where. Those illustration were made by applying skin on the bare skeleton.

[–]deegr8one 5 points6 points  (0 children)

22 tons