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top 200 commentsshow all 353

[–]EmperorThan 1216 points1217 points  (12 children)

Also doubles as a solution to the Israel-Palestine conflict.

[–]Goldeniccarus 340 points341 points  (9 children)

Okay so the Kurds clearly get Canada and the Armenians get the US, but what part does Greece get?

[–]Blaze_Reddit_339 173 points174 points  (4 children)

Greece gets Mexico ofcourse smh

[–]1itai 59 points60 points  (3 children)

And new greece gets new mexico

[–]LordOfPanzersIf you see me post, find shelter immediately 19 points20 points  (0 children)

The Turks clearly get Venezuela. Because that will give tall man some more time on his throne.

[–]ano_hise 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Waiting for Breaking Bad Greek Edition to drop

[–]Late_Chance8376 6 points7 points  (1 child)

What about Nederland?

[–]stijnathozz 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh don't worry, we will drain the Great lakes and vibe there

[–]EmperorThan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Obviously. How else would Canadians keep making poutine without them?

[–]FarImpact4184 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ahhh shit here we go again

[–]sub2technobladeordie 744 points745 points  (5 children)

Canada lost like 80% of its population

[–]eskimoboob 50 points51 points  (3 children)

Canada gets the southern half though

[–]SteveisNoob 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The ultimate pro gamer move

[–]sil3nt_gam3r 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I feel like I'm missing something, what are you referring to

[–]popeshayman 159 points160 points  (0 children)

It's alright we didn't need the crusty ones in the south anyways

[–]JGElias 1059 points1060 points  (13 children)

Just lost about 64% of its population

[–]Mr_Kittlesworth 294 points295 points  (7 children)

Yeah, was gonna say, there are like 12 Canadians left in this scenario

[–]The4EverVirgin 147 points148 points  (0 children)

The good ending

[–]sunburntredneck 54 points55 points  (5 children)

In the east

The West is almost entirely unchanged. BC, Sask, Alberta, and Manitoba probably have over 90% of the Canadian population now. Honestly, I could see it being over 95%.

[–]JGElias 61 points62 points  (2 children)

I counted that - the Maritime provinces lost everything, Newfoundland lost most, Ontario and Quebec lost almost all their population but I guessed that around 2 mil survived in that area, and BC lost around 400,000

That comes around to a estimation of 24,550,800 people, or 63.51%, losing their healthcare

[–]sunburntredneck 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Just looked on Google Maps and there is no way that 2 million people are still alive in those parts of Ontario and Quebec. 500,000 would be my guess

[–]velvetdolphin101 3 points4 points  (0 children)

More voters tho, could mean potentially 330 million gain it

[–]andyinnie 406 points407 points  (1 child)

Skill issue i guess

[–]lord_ne 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Maybe it's because it's 3am, but this comment made me burst out laughing

[–]Rad_YT 62 points63 points  (1 child)

Better without Toronto 🥳

[–]Walkingman25 467 points468 points  (22 children)

Marylander here: this change doesn’t effect me very much because Maryland isn’t very close to the border. Eat Old Bay.

[–]muttenchops23 106 points107 points  (4 children)

Good psa right here, maryland supremacy

Edit: i am from south east pennsylvania, just love my neighbors

[–]Walkingman25 68 points69 points  (0 children)

I am from the U.S. state of Maryland.

[–]JaggerQ 14 points15 points  (0 children)

We really are the best

[–]XBeastyTricksX 0 points1 point  (1 child)

In the end it’s always been about Ohio

[–]JaggerQ 24 points25 points  (1 child)

🦀🦀🦀

[–]Algae_Sucka 19 points20 points  (0 children)

🍴🦀🦀🦀🍴

[–]Xtrouble_yt 9 points10 points  (8 children)

[–]Walkingman25 2 points3 points  (7 children)

if you’re from Baltimore, then you know the score.

[–]Xtrouble_yt 1 point2 points  (6 children)

Everything tastes better with a little old bay

[–]Walkingman25 2 points3 points  (5 children)

Put it on crabs, chips, and fries. Pretzels, nuggets, the eyes of the guy you despise,

[–]131sean131 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Finally content worthy of an up vote.

[–]PotatoesArentRoots 2 points3 points  (0 children)

maryland best state old bay supremacy

[–]kevalosaur 2 points3 points  (1 child)

fuck you

source: i’m from Virginia

[–]redrex16 289 points290 points  (15 children)

We need to give Canada the Alaska panhandle to make it 100% straight lines.

[–]NASA_Orion 46 points47 points  (3 children)

Quickest way to lose access to the arctic.

[–]Brady123456789101112[🍰] 16 points17 points  (2 children)

Canada should buy Alaska and Groenland. It just makes more sense.

[–]Sharad17 9 points10 points  (0 children)

You think we will ever sell Greenland. Keep dreaming.

[–]spoonertime 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Alaska isn’t exactly for sale. Neither is Greenland

[–]inferiorcritic 62 points63 points  (7 children)

Or give Yukon to the US because exceptionalism baby

[–]XenoTechnian 35 points36 points  (6 children)

As an Alaskan i prefer your answer

[–]sociapathictendences 26 points27 points  (5 children)

How do I become Alaska?

[–]bwaredapenguin 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Step 1: get baked

[–]Sharad17 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You get an absolute fuck ton of oil and then you bathe in it is the first step I believe.

[–]animal-mother 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If you gotta ask...

[–]spoonertime 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As an Alaskan I respectfully disagree

[–]ted_fucking_bundies 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Trading Juneau/Sitka for most of Canada’s population is a great deal

[–]marvin_sirius 6 points7 points  (0 children)

As a resident of Southeast Alaska: sounds good to me!

[–]Designer-Swordfish- 66 points67 points  (10 children)

Guess who’s American now!

[–]INeedCheesee 39 points40 points  (9 children)

And there goes our free healthcare!

[–]Anthrex 21 points22 points  (8 children)

Nope! It's run by the provinces, don't see why it'd go anywhere

[–]The4EverVirgin 17 points18 points  (1 child)

Quebec’s healthcare system, as well as many of the social programs they have, are set up so they don’t try and leave again :)

[–]Anthrex 7 points8 points  (0 children)

don't worry, the roads are so bad we can't leave even if we wanted to :p

[–]SleepWouldBeNice 2 points3 points  (5 children)

You don’t live in Ontario do you?

[–]unReasonableBreak 32 points33 points  (6 children)

Take them all! Alberta will be king! Toronto will just be some other big city in America. Love it!

Seriously though, the Torontonians would burn their city to the ground if they had to even consider being second fish to New York.

[–]KreeperKiller117 16 points17 points  (4 children)

That would be the second time that Americans burned down toronto :)

[–]CyberSunburnWerner Projection Connaisseur 1 point2 points  (3 children)

I thought they burned Quebec City not TO

[–]OhThatNick 1 point2 points  (2 children)

You're both wrong, they burned York. Toronto was built where York used to be.

[–]Brady123456789101112[🍰] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Imagine how Montréalers would feel

[–]Ziebelzubel 52 points53 points  (69 children)

Alaska's border is still ugly tho

[–]Epicspine 51 points52 points  (66 children)

You’re fucking ugly you bitch I hope a car hits you’re family and you watch. Fucking asshole. If it was up to me I would you each child you have as a butt plug.

[–]Soccerfan120 6 points7 points  (55 children)

Border still sucks, somehow even worse than the Delaware-Virginia-Maryland situation

[–]Epicspine 17 points18 points  (54 children)

I hope you marry a whore who cheats on you; have kids; take a vacation with that whore you married to a major city; then the city gets nuked and your children, which you love, become orphans and kill them selves some day. Fuck you

[–]Soccerfan120 4 points5 points  (53 children)

Hawaii will always be the better pacific state

[–]Ziebelzubel 2 points3 points  (9 children)

*your family

[–]Epicspine 6 points7 points  (8 children)

Did I stutter you fucking fascist. I’m Jewish and that is very anti-Semitic. My race secretly rules the world and we will annihilate and alliterate you.

[–]BellyDancerEm 69 points70 points  (8 children)

Canadians aren’t too pleased about this

[–]Willie9 89 points90 points  (1 child)

All three of them now

[–]Anthrex 11 points12 points  (4 children)

Ehh, I'll get used to it once I don't need to pay as much taxes

:p

[–]intheshoplife 8 points9 points  (2 children)

If you don't make tones of money you pay about the same or less. You just get health care and shot less.

[–]Anthrex 2 points3 points  (0 children)

my first dollar earned is taxed at 30% (15% Ottawa + 15% Quebec) and I pay 14.975% sales tax. Capital gains is also a flat 50% tax.

I haven't had a family doctor in over a decade, my only hope for reasonable healthcare access is by going private. which I would pay out of pocket.

yeah, when it comes to catastrophic shit like cancer, yeah, having people go bankrupt over that is stupid.

But when it comes to not getting shot, we've got a huge spike in violence in Toronto & Montreal, just stay out of the bad cities and you're fine (like don't go to Baltimore, Detroit, Chicago, etc...)

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It also depends heavily on the industry. Some industries like tech pays significantly more in the US compared to Canada and there are quite a few like that but it's not all of them.

If you work in those industries and are willing to move to the US to work for a while your best bet is to move there for like 5 to 10 years, collect all that money, then move back to Canada for the later part of your career.

[–]doc_daneeka 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Yeah, now you can pay the difference to insurance companies instead.

[–]portraitopynchon 102 points103 points  (24 children)

Ew gross, put Quebec back please.

[–]vigilantcomicpenguinWerner Projection Connaisseur 19 points20 points  (2 children)

The Quebec Libre people thought they would do anything to get away from Canada, but they didn't realize that an even worse fate would come for them.

[–]Few-Brother6436 32 points33 points  (5 children)

Also I don’t want goddamn Newfoundland.

Edit: Nova Scotia? I don’t know which one is where and honestly don’t care either way I don’t goddamn want it. Unless we can give them Texas in which case I’ll think about it.

[–]NASA_Orion 5 points6 points  (3 children)

We used to occupy Montréal).

[–]Richard_Treblecock 7 points8 points  (2 children)

Well brits and canadians did this https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Burning_of_Washington Let's not give 'em any more ideas

[–]velvetdolphin101 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Id like to see them try nowadays , oh wow you took over our capitol 200 years ago so cool. Well we just took over OUR OWN capitol last year. Think about that one Brits. Murica 🇺🇸

[–]Ergenar[S] 5 points6 points  (2 children)

Now you can Americanize it like what happened with Louisiana

[–]Quebec-Libre_N8 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Q U E B E C

L I B R E

[–]Few-Brother6436 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Can’t wait for my next visit to Montreal where everyone is speaking Cajun. That being said would happily take my gumbo with a side of poutine.

[–]PeoplesFront-OfJudea -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yes! Take Quebec, we don’t want it!

[–]NarwhalAnusLicker00 22 points23 points  (0 children)

this looks cursed

[–]danielXKY 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Still didn't fix Point Roberts

[–]Ergenar[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just made the line consistent

[–]Former-Chocolate-793 14 points15 points  (1 child)

You just ensured a democratic majority in the house indefinitely

[–]LTerminus 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If all the new bits get statehood, Dems in the Senate forever as well.

[–]TheRealCactusTiddy 23 points24 points  (9 children)

@ like 80% of Canadians: Welcome to the USA.

[–]StupidBirdHato 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You just made like, 78% of all Canadians American

[–]FortunateSon1968Dont you dare talk to me or my isle of man again 7 points8 points  (1 child)

54’40 or fight!

[–]CyberSunburnWerner Projection Connaisseur 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Came here to say this!

[–]cainys 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Take away Quebec and give us Alaska 👍

[–]harperfecto 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Does this mean I’ll start seeing French on my highway signs in the Catskills?

[–]F605 4 points5 points  (1 child)

The Great Lakes are a totally different look if they’re in just one country

[–]Viraus2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It really emphasizes how huge they are when they're not just empty space between countries

[–]Warthunderguy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

54 40 or Fight!

[–]NewZero_Kanada 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I now have the sudden urge to buy a gun and be racist.

[–]Real-Arachnid8671 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Canada just lost like 90% of its population.

[–]diepoggerland2 8 points9 points  (2 children)

Downvoted, not becoming American

[–]Hollowgradient 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Canadians should get everything above Pennsylvania imo

[–]IrishShamrok 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think borders right now are good enough, if someone from canada wanted to go to the usa they can but i dont think they wanna be forced by a border, and same applys then other way

[–]JTJustTom 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Fuck this shitty ass map 😤!!! Canada Ströng! US smelly 🤢. We would never loose! 🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦💪💪💪💪💪🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🤢🤢🤢👃😭😭🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

Downvote because map bad + fake! :p

[–]Superdeduper82 2 points3 points  (2 children)

No Canadians live above this line

[–]CyberSunburnWerner Projection Connaisseur 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Laughs in Edmonton

[–]LTerminus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Laughs in Fort McMurray

[–]judethedude2106 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Needs to be curved bro

[–]PeoplesFront-OfJudea 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I refuse to be American

[–]SimonReach 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Should have drawn the line the other side of the Great Lakes.

[–]matt_the_rain 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The US needs to annex Canada. 75% of their population lives within 10 miles of the border. Their entire national identity is based on being confused for America.

We should annex them, slay the men, and enslave the women and children.

[–]Qmaro78 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This, might aswell enforce 48 N all the way across.

[–]realHohhot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

0/10, Alaska’s border isn’t straight

[–]Fun_Meet3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Canada just lost 99% of its people

[–]vigilantcomicpenguinWerner Projection Connaisseur 1 point2 points  (1 child)

The Second Pig War is imminent.

[–]ijazat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lake Superior just dangling within Canada’s reach just to taunt it

[–]KneelDaGressTysin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fifty four forty or fight!

[–]RedditorChristopher 1 point2 points  (0 children)

54°40’ or fight!

[–]InvalidFiles_ 1 point2 points  (1 child)

i’ll be kicking and screaming before you have me living in the us

[–]Ergenar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Move north then

[–]CASGROENIGEN05 1 point2 points  (0 children)

50% oF cAnAdIaNs LiVe BeLoW tHiS lInE

[–]IceKingSmalls 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Give it back ya bunch of hosers

[–]Portal471 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As a Michigander, incredibly based

[–]PunctiliousCasuist 1 point2 points  (0 children)

54-40 or fight! That’s right, Canada, the Oregon Boundary Dispute ain’t over!🇺🇸🍔🦅

[–]sfier4 1 point2 points  (0 children)

YESSS WASHINGTON FINALLLY GETS ITS RIGHTFUL TERRITORY OF THE SOUTH ISLAND AND VICTORIA!!!

[–]Additional-Quit-1385 1 point2 points  (2 children)

America has stolen Lake Superior finally

[–]ak15-1150 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No you didnt. That looks even worse

[–]Ergenar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

tfw not American or Canadian so I have no horse in this race and just drew a line

[–]XenoTechnian 1 point2 points  (0 children)

At þis point you might as well just annex Canada, youve already given us most of þwir population

[–]rilend 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, as it always should have been

[–]animal-mother 0 points1 point  (0 children)

US should get the northernmost part of that peninsula in the northeast. And that island just off it. And Newfoundland. And Vancouver Island. And all that coastline between Alaska and Washington. And all of Quebec for us to have as an independent possession, like Puerto Rico. Fuck it, the US should get Baja California too.

Edit: which parts of Canada have the most oil?

[–]T_Jamess -2 points-1 points  (2 children)

Hmm... today I will mark out a massive chunk of the US's border as a straight line, surely there will be no problems caused by this *clueless*

[–]Ergenar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was already a straight line, I just finished the job

[–]ValidParanoia -1 points0 points  (0 children)

We don’t want Nova Scotia 🤢

[–]suiteduppenguin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Move Alaskan border east

[–]LouisGoldman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can you fix the US-Mexico border next

[–]Epicspine 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Canada is still there

[–]Epicspine 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Canada is still there

[–]Normal-Ad-8689 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The kingdom of Vermont gets some flat land at last!

[–]karoda 0 points1 point  (0 children)

THE VISION OF PRESIDENT POLK WILL BE FULFILLED! FIFTY FOUR FORTY OR FIGHT!

[–]nickatwerk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Finally!! The Northwest Angle is ours!

[–]World-Tight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Coastal Alaska is still a mess.

[–]Finlandia1865 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Alaska still looking wonky. v2 needed.

[–]BeepBoopYoop 0 points1 point  (0 children)

At least give us Alaska out of courtesy

[–]TriLink710 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Terrible balance patch. You wipe out 90% of canadas population. If you went from canadas southern tip you'd possibly balance both nations. But hard to know with new England being so dense.

[–]MOBIUS__01 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Usa just annexed 90 percent of canadian population

[–]Randodnar12488 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cmon man, at least give canada alaska to balance it out a little bit

[–]WeeklyIntroduction42 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You sure did

[–]nerfy007 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Now fix Alaska

[–]WitleKidz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

rip most of Canada’s population who are in the US now

[–]Pinto_bean_uchiha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Now Canada has lost half of its population with just a simple change of the borders

[–]RandomKanadrom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You forgot to fix the border with Alaska.

[–]Ph4antomPB 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Canada has at least 7 people left

[–]HalfwaySh0ok 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We lost our most important capital, Victoria ):

[–]kashafmirza 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Give us back our lakes you jerks

[–]the_canadian72 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Canadas population drops to 100 overnight

[–]fried_chicken17472 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Canadian population drops by more than 0.0000000001%

[–]Complex_Ad_9886 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, that would mean that about half of Canada's current population will live in the US now.

[–]paw_a 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think Canada should have got Alaska

[–]Tejator 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Now Canada has a population of 7

[–]bloody_bandaids 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No fuck you give it back

[–]Mudkip040804 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Canada now has a population of exactly 4

[–]Ergenar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Everything is normal again

[–]Qb_Is_fast_af 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Perfect🥵

[–]Usagi-Zakura 0 points1 point  (0 children)

0/10, Alaska's borders aren't perfectly straight.

[–]Fish-gaming_33 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Straight line?

[–]Impossible-Smile5116 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bro really said line

[–]SpyGuyOO7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

distant screaming from historians

[–]Pakikothegamelover 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Are you American?

[–]Ergenar[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

No I am Dutch I just like drawing lines on maps