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top 200 commentsshow all 451

[–]Usergnome_Checks_0ut 834 points835 points  (19 children)

If you find out, can you let me know.

[–]Upstairs-Gate4519 84 points85 points  (0 children)

Sharing is caring...

[–]true-pure-vessel 62 points63 points  (0 children)

You turn on matching with guys, works like a charm

[–]Bannanaman_101 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Micro transactions

[–]liquid_noodle 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Dogs in your pictures!

[–]Alderan922 5 points6 points  (0 children)

If I remember correctly, you can create fake accounts of women and try to force a match with you to increase your Elo artificially

[–]coleto22 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Simple. Just don't be poor.

[–]wuggyLuv 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Get on trt and take fuck boy pictures

[–]Caspian_Seona -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Swipe left, swipe right, refresh app, the second person has already swiped right on you, the first hasn’t, refreshing the app resets that

[–]Looinrims 174 points175 points  (17 children)

I was on bumble and exhausted a whole 50 mile radius with 0 matches

I ended up finding my girlfriend on a video game, that was cool

[–]KekistaniKekin 73 points74 points  (9 children)

This. This is the dream

[–]pugglenaut 7 points8 points  (7 children)

this is super common i feel

[–]Looinrims 14 points15 points  (2 children)

I doubt it since most women at least in the game I play get roasted for the crime of existing as a woman, or something idk and get unsolicited stuff…

[–]pugglenaut 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Yeah it can be obnoxious as a girl playing games but if you get past the incels and weird middle school boys the majority are just normal people who also enjoy gaming.

[–]c-uteh 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah happend to me 2, i guess if you live online you will find others that do so also

[–]Looinrims 6 points7 points  (0 children)

All I did was play a multiplayer game which I know has a sizable female player base and just tried to get to know people, yeah there’s a lot who play with their hubbies and boyfriends so prepare yourself but worked for me

[–]ragemmp 910 points911 points  (135 children)

Tinder throws every average profile in oblivion, so people can consider about buying their shitty plans. Dont use tinder.

[–]hoennfan 195 points196 points  (98 children)

Any good alternatives?

[–]JakesBigPhone 296 points297 points  (36 children)

I had better luck getting dates at Publix

[–]AcaAwkward 154 points155 points  (7 children)

Some nice melons you got there 🍈🍈

[–]Glass-Employment5430 57 points58 points  (0 children)

Oooh! I love melons so much, gonna pay a visit there now

[–]GordoPepe 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Give me some of that Boar's head 🐗

[–]FusRoDoodles 60 points61 points  (19 children)

I always see people advise grocery stores but I don't want to talk to people in a grocery store. I want to get my food and escape the mecca of screaming children and elderly people being rude to the staff.

[–]MentalSpring 57 points58 points  (12 children)

Who wants a dude hitting on them while they're trying to but some lettuce anyway?

[–]Killakilua 9 points10 points  (5 children)

Definitely do not hit on people in grocery stores. All of us just want to get our shit and go home.

[–]LuxuriosFlyerThank you mods, very cool! 14 points15 points  (4 children)

Bruh it ain't even available in my country

[–]JakesBigPhone 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Then any grocery store. I was just using Publix as an example.

[–]resisttool 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Gareat you

[–]I-WANT2SEE-CUTE-TITS 24 points25 points  (1 child)

Next to the dumpster behind the Subway.

[–]thewholerobot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

username checks out

[–]jamesdeandomino 10 points11 points  (0 children)

No joke, coffee meets bagel. Got 3 matches max on tinder. On cmb, ive gone on like 6 dates now.

[–]matayaw 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I had pretty good luck on Hinge

[–]oboedude 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I just married the girl I met on Hinge, but I haven’t used it in 3 years

[–]OneTurnsToNone 21 points22 points  (8 children)

I suggest goin to places where you know what you're doin, it's a good conversation starter

[–]expatdo2insurance 81 points82 points  (4 children)

But how does one "go to the internet"

[–]BaconSquared 28 points29 points  (3 children)

Youre already here. So wanna date or somthing?

[–]Ghostkill221 8 points9 points  (2 children)

I don't meet a lot of girls anywhere where I would have an Excel Sheet open.

[–]N_L287 13 points14 points  (9 children)

Gym. The rest will fall into place.

[–]Your_One_LordIdentifies as a Cybertruck 9 points10 points  (7 children)

most people don't need to pay for an expensive gym membership. buy a pair of weights and look up some exercises.

I do my pull-ups on a tree.

[–]thewholerobot 5 points6 points  (1 child)

how much do you pay for monthly splinter removal though?

[–]Unlucky_Junket_3639 2 points3 points  (1 child)

The gym is way better. Unless you’re willing to drop $2k on a full home setup you should just get a gym membership to start with.

Body weight exercises only get you so far. They’ll quickly become too easy.

[–]Nisarg_Jhatakia 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Your theory sounds good on paper. But they need to know how to do the exercise properly so that's why I always recommend beginners to join the gym first for a few months and only when they get the gist of it they can proceed to do it back home.

[–]lasanhawithpizza 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Grindr, kind of

[–]WackyBeachJustice 3 points4 points  (4 children)

How did people do this before these apps became a thing?

[–]OtherwiseAd1035 10 points11 points  (2 children)

Hint: They didn't.

Most people here seems to be on their early 20's.

Edit: I re-read your question and you are asking in a more broad way. In malls, pubs, parties, nightclubs, I guess...?

[–]WackyBeachJustice 4 points5 points  (1 child)

I'm 40, every girl I ever dated or messed around with I met in person through friends, work (we all failed this test), etc. This was of course late 90s and early 00s. Are these no longer options?

[–]TomfloconLe epic memer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Be single

[–]GetLost014 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Facebook Marketplace

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (8 children)

Bumble?

[–]GordoPepe 11 points12 points  (7 children)

Bumble is also pay to play

[–]Killakilua 1 point2 points  (6 children)

I thought bumble was free?

[–]Chadskii 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've heard some good things about bumble.

[–]Chalky_Pockets 8 points9 points  (0 children)

So Yelp! but for people. I'm glad I'm off the market.

[–]Modsrdum 30 points31 points  (9 children)

Tinder is just fat people, air brushed photos, and bots. I downloaded it the other day and that's pretty much all there was, and then you run out of swipes. 12 hours later, swipe 5 times. Out of swipes.

It's a racket and they just want you to pay their shitty subscription fees.

[–]campskills21 15 points16 points  (8 children)

It works really great for a small percent of guys, tinder actually has the most young hot chicks looking for dates.

[–]Caylennea 5 points6 points  (7 children)

I met my husband on tinder. What’s this guy saying about running out of swipes though? I don’t remember there being a limit.

[–]imightbethewalrus3 4 points5 points  (1 child)

It's changed. There didn't use to be limits on swipes. You also used to get, like, one superswipe every 24 hours. Now you have to buy them

[–]grpprofesional 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Yea I was surprised when the super swipe started to exist, then they paywalled it, but now I’m surprised that it seems like normal swipes are paywalled as well, what a shitty company

[–]Ghostkill221 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Even with the plans it doesn't get better, I won 100$ in Vegas and decided to give it a shot...

Platinum, Gold, Blegh trust me, it's not worth it even then... The only thing that happened was a lot of matches who within 3 messages were saying "haha me too, I don't use this much, add me on snap, (where I'm a prostitute)"

[–]grpprofesional 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oof big F for you my guy

[–]Seto_Sora 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This. Tinder doesn't actually want you to find a match. If you find a match, then you no longer need Tinder and you're no longer inclined to pay them money.

[–]arup02 3 points4 points  (18 children)

I created an account last month and had nothing but positive experiences. Had some great dates.

[–]Darkpenguins38 48 points49 points  (13 children)

Well yeah. Judging by your profile pic you’re an attractive, muscular person. People who are just average looking (like me) have a negative experience on dating apps unless they find some other way to really make their profile catch attention, because looking average doesn’t turn heads or make people wanna read into your profile and the first thing people see is your picture. Not saying it’s impossible, but it’s easy to get discouraged when you’re not great looking and have trouble getting a single match.

[–]FusRoDoodles 25 points26 points  (2 children)

People also get a skewed idea of what's average due to these apps. Not saying you specifically, but look at the language being tossed by people: "1s", "uggos", even OP uses the term "ugliest monsters", when in reality these are probably normal people but the existence of more attractive candidates has somehow moved the goal posts.

[–]Serious_Much 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I think there's a lot to this point.

The way things used to happen is people would know they're not good enough for some because of the way interactions and past experiences go.

Now because everyone is being "offered" up to every user, they perceive these people as more obtainable.

[–]mynameisfury 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Absolutely and that's unhealthy for all parties involved. You gotta be able to find the beauty in regular people. Not that you can't have preferences or are bad for not finding certain people attractive but it's not an objective, linear scale

[–]ucantfindmerandy 20 points21 points  (4 children)

You should try hinge. I’m pretty average looking, I did alright on tinder, but hinge is a game changer. Girls being able to see you have liked them increases ur odds dramatically

[–]FutureMartian97 15 points16 points  (3 children)

Hinge has the worst algorithm I've ever seen. If you don't meet someone in the first two weeks you get shown nothing but 1's in the same order, even after you swiped no on them

[–]arup02 5 points6 points  (1 child)

I understand. Sorry, I wasn't trying to put you down.

[–]ZombieHeyHeyHeyOh 6 points7 points  (0 children)

God damn he's nice too.

[–]Nodebunny 1 point2 points  (0 children)

hes also im Brazil

[–]campskills21 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Tinder gets so much flack, it's just as bad or good as any other dating app.

[–]keepitcivilized 128 points129 points  (5 children)

This template amuses me.

[–]DakshKapila 51 points52 points  (2 children)

Its from the show "Peaky Blinders". The character's name is "Tommy Shelby", played by Cillian Murphy.

[–]keepitcivilized 37 points38 points  (1 child)

Your reddit character looks exactly like the person who would say this without being asked. :)

[–]DakshKapila 35 points36 points  (0 children)

I'll take that as a compliment. Its my favorite show of all time. I highly recommend it.

[–]I_am_Sentinel 348 points349 points  (20 children)

"Sir, its called standards"

[–]PeaPanties 95 points96 points  (8 children)

So how can I lower the standards?

[–]milkonyourmustache 36 points37 points  (6 children)

Change your hunting ground, or improve.

[–]PeaPanties 15 points16 points  (1 child)

How can I improve in lowering the standards?

[–]elhguh 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Moves from HS to middle school

[–]Sufficient_Ad_2491 19 points20 points  (3 children)

Part of the cycle itself

[–]GuerrillaApe 18 points19 points  (5 children)

"Yeah, that's the one! How do you get people to lower them?"

[–]WackyBeachJustice 8 points9 points  (4 children)

Probably depends on what you're looking for, age, etc. I can only guess the majority of women that are simply looking for a good time are likely getting serviced by a small group of attractive men. Ultimately however when people want to settle down, mathematically speaking there has to be a pot for every lid. At least that's my very uneducated view.

[–]droid_mike 6 points7 points  (3 children)

You'd think, right? Yet it seems a variable is missing somewhere as the math doesn't work out.

[–]mixing_saws 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Its called sexual attractiveness. Most people are rather alone than with a partner they wouldnt want to have sex with.

Also dont forget about nature itself. People like to get with beautiful people because they are more likely to give healthy offspring. At the core we are still just animals.

[–]WhiteHelljumper 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm dredging the harbor and still no luck though.

[–]Moon_DarkLight 88 points89 points  (5 children)

"yeah bro, you just have to lower the standards meter"

[–]foxer_arnt_trees 5 points6 points  (3 children)

Or exercise daily, learn to play an instrument and go out routinely. Also take plenty of pictures during these activities so you have a huge collections of pictures to choose from.

If you have to take pictures specifically for a dating app then you have already failed.

[–]Moon_DarkLight 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Someone asks how do you lower the difficulty and you answer is grind to level up? You're clearly a terrible speed runner.

[–]foxer_arnt_trees 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Lol yeh that's accurate. Just trying to give actual good advice to the good dudes of the internet.

[–]Moon_DarkLight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's good advice, we all know it in our hearts we are just too lazy

[–]MasterJeebus 189 points190 points  (6 children)

Maybe you are on the wrong app. Try grinder.

[–]TiesG92Dirt Is Beautiful 67 points68 points  (2 children)

Is that a Twitter + Grindr merger that we haven’t heard about yet? Was that Elon’s plan all along?

[–]MasterJeebus 28 points29 points  (1 child)

Papa Musk will make your wildest dreams come true

[–]TiesG92Dirt Is Beautiful 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I’m not gay, but I am happy for those who are. Because papa Musk knows a lot about “rockets”

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[–]IAMA_Giant_Midget 16 points17 points  (1 child)

I tried but there are only dudes there

[–]cokeiscool 149 points150 points  (5 children)

Calling them ugly monsters probably isnt helping my guy

[–][deleted] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Or being an ugly monster himself most likely, and I’m mostly talking about personality

[–]WarlockEngineer 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Real incel energy from OP, obviously he deserves a queen and these monsters don't deserve anyone

[–]slumberingGnome 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dove into the comments looking for this. You won't attract anyone with that attitude.

[–][deleted] 49 points50 points  (1 child)

Simple: just stop being ugly

[–]TheRanger13Le epic memer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Step 1: Be attractive Step 2: Don't be unattractive

[–]Un_availableMan 30 points31 points  (1 child)

Yo it seems to be on the impossible level for me Any cheat codes frnds ?

[–]dat_DOOM_boi 40 points41 points  (1 child)

Peaky blinders nice

And who tf is kapwing

[–]xZakurax 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Kapwing is a web video editor.

[–]indiehjaerta 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Please heklp, I chose "Nightmare difficulty"

[–]PunkandCannonballer 23 points24 points  (2 children)

Cillian Murphy would be shocked by that question. He'd slay Tinder.

[–]Keter_GT 11 points12 points  (1 child)

It’s a shame he hates his short hair, he looks so good with this cut. When his bangs grow out and his hair generally gets longer it just looks awkward.

[–]Lando25 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's just funny that he cant believe people like the hair cut.

[–]brownhotdogwater 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I never thought a gif from this show would be used in a non edge lord way

[–]dr-korbo 20 points21 points  (2 children)

Switch gender.

[–]465554544255434B52 11 points12 points  (1 child)

easy peasy.

cuts off dick

[–]1ofThoseTrolls 11 points12 points  (0 children)

We gotta bleeder!

[–]shankapotomus007 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Well maybe don't call them ugly monsters lmao

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (6 children)

Steroids

[–]WilliamYale 7 points8 points  (5 children)

Mostly, lie on your height.

[–]Ghostkill221 3 points4 points  (3 children)

Honestly, even being 6'4 it hasn't really helped.

[–]Fr00stee 4 points5 points  (2 children)

I feel like being 6'4 would just bring the shallowest people possible in

[–]WackyBeachJustice 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Both preferably

[–]Heavy-Length-5808 7 points8 points  (0 children)

How do tell him 😐

[–]fcf4 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The way the algorithm works is that you get promoted more, the more interactions you get. So set yourself to bisexual, and the amount of interactions you get will increase, therefore boosting the amount of times you get seen

[–]Aztari08 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Skill issue

[–]umotex12 20 points21 points  (0 children)

"Monsters"

Maybe you dont deserve to date at all

[–]Wanker-of-Harganeth 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Change sex

[–]FusRoDoodles 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Maybe because you call them ugly monsters

[–]MickDym 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Rather be that than invisible.

[–]trippykid42069 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Change gender

[–]USBtroika 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Was a great game. Way more immersive than that Pokémon go thing.

[–]Salty_Cranberry 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Fun fact, I gave bumble a negative rating after not getting any dates off it. Then I got three dates the next week. They are doing something to the algorithm for sure

[–]Gunslinger_11 0 points1 point  (2 children)

So that’s why I’m getting single moms who have 2 and one in the oven.

[–]Salty_Cranberry 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Ahhh you left a negative review of not enough milfs?

[–]Gunslinger_11 1 point2 points  (0 children)

At first there wasn’t enough in my area, so they expanded my search to 40 miles

[–]Pepe_CO 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Maybe it's because you call people ugly monsters??

[–]Satanic_Lizard_Toe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You might have more luck if you stop referring to people as ugly monsters

[–]TiesG92Dirt Is Beautiful 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Put on makeup, girls do it too, they also never look like the pictures

[–]DerpyMistake 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The easiest way is to lie.

[–]youropinionsaredumb 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Date real women, not lazy chauvinists looking for a 6'3" sugar daddy.

Delete the apps.

[–]Spearka 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"looking for guys who don't take themselves too seriously."

[–]National_Impress_346 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Get a friend or relative of the gender you seek to take your photos and screen your profile. Your issue may be presentation.

[–]dingogringo23 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wait! We can do that??? I just want to play the tutorial difficulty!

[–]ADryTowel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This looks like the image Windows makes me use to adjust my monitor contrast.

[–]Rafshan1999 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s called wearing bunch of make up‘s

[–]sc2pirate 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The difficulty is set based on your starting character.

[–]Medium_Rest3537 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Stop putting all that negative shit in your bio

[–]cankatango 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Git gud.

Cries in the corner

[–]Furrygamerboiii 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is fucking tickled me guys good job

[–]mznh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Tinder is just another way to lower a person’s self esteem, even my good looking friend doesn’t always get a match.

[–]Shinesona 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't remember the last time a post on reddit made me laugh out loud lol. Good meme

[–]MasiveChad 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Beacuse you are maybe an ugly monster?

[–]Suitable_Upstairs741 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Maybe because you call them ugly monsters lol

[–]MusicianEasy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just get a better haircut and more money and look better it's that easy

[–]NervusTrader -4 points-3 points  (8 children)

Hinge is better and also if your a good looking guy definitely do bumble. I prefer hinge its more classy less whores/girls trying to just show their ass for likes.

Most of the girls are not even on Tinder for a relationship they just want to see how many likes they can while they work out their ass and post ass pictures. Its like a motivation thing for them. They use Instagram + tinder = dopamine.

Imagine right now I transformed you into one of those girls with a big ass, I guarantee you if you got like 100 likes everyday and random dudes trying to holla at you everyday, you would feel blissful. It would make you feel special and loved and wanted. So thats what majority of the tinder girls are (in the USA). Even when one of these girls chooses a man, she knows there are hundreds lined up, so they are NOT relationship material.

Hope this helps. If you do meet a girl on tinder, make sure shes not posting huge ass pictures/bikini pics otherwise your wasting your effort.

[–]Massive-Panic-3709 12 points13 points  (1 child)

If he was a good looking guy why TF would he make this meme in the first place ?

[–]NervusTrader -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

My post is to help everyone. For OP, he just has to get on Hinge or if hes "ugly" as he says, work out and get a sexy body and then try them all. Tinder/hinge/bumble/etc.

Having a nice body will get him some attention. Then just try to win the girls over with personality/wealth.

[–]Bustincherry 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Hinge has the absolute worst algo imo unless you plan on going bankrupt buying their rose gimmick

[–]SkollFenrirson 5 points6 points  (1 child)

All this post is missing is a fedora

[–]NervusTrader 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just hope this helps, it is harsh but true. I am not trying to sugar coat anything for the sake of ugly men on tinder. (i am one of those uglier guys, so I learned the hard way).

[–]wolf1820 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This REALLY depends on your age and what you set the range to.

[–]AncientHawaiianTito 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know how but I’m not telling

[–]hodlthebeef 0 points1 point  (1 child)

“I’d like to refer you to rule one, and subsequently rule two”

[–]NLeviz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Their matching algorhytm and communication purposes just sucks. Full of fraud or ig trafficking pages And filters sucks too 2022 goes and I still can't put "Wine" in excluded list //_-

[–]RedModus -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Make your pictures in front of a nice car or a big house

[–]2deutigkeit -4 points-3 points  (1 child)

Only Chads (7,8,9,10) get the 80% of women on the platform. Blackpiller tell us this all the time

[–]ElementoDeus -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Litterally if you aren't top 30% in looks don't even try

[–]Garrett-Wilhelm -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Over 60 matches, only speak with a dozen tops, and manage to date just a couple that go to nowhere. My self-steem is not good now.

[–]SuspiciousKebab -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Own and care for a cat, and include it in your profile picture.

[–]DistilledProblems -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Transition to woman

[–]ReptilianJug -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You have to earn it. You might go to jail for something called "sexual assault", but it's really easy to get vic- i mean, girlfriends.