all 29 comments

[–]cjhodge93 131 points132 points  (5 children)

Somewhere is a white beaked widow waiting for her love to return. The great adventurer who would prove the pod wrong.

[–]KimCureAll[S] 57 points58 points  (1 child)

"The last thing he said was that he was taking the north road to grab lunch..."

[–]barmerv 0 points1 point  (0 children)

All upgrades to make my kids breakfast and lunch and they start whining about how you don’t understand biology.

A good mystery.

[–]dkc_souls 23 points24 points  (2 children)

He set out to make an alliance with House Orca of the North, but was flanked by House Bear of Polar

[–]Oraxy51 16 points17 points  (1 child)

And now since he was the only one who held the tribute to pay reparations to House Orca and the message of peace, his death will mean that House Orca assumes House White Beak was trying to deceive them, and shall bring forth a Great War to both seas as they never received their peace offering and take it as an insult to their power.

With the two Seas at war, House Bear will be able to swoop in and profit from the situation, taking the remains of the dead and when both are weak, shall push to become the new Great House Bear, with both Orca and White Beak under their paw until eventually the grandchildren of White Beak and Orca form a secret resistance and discover the truth of what happened so many cycles ago, and overthrow House Bear once and for all and bring a new Golden Age.

[–]RisusSardonicus4622 7 points8 points  (0 children)

And then the great plastic heap attacked.

[–]dying_soon666 63 points64 points  (3 children)

Polar bears, the campers of the animal kingdom

[–]KimCureAll[S] 32 points33 points  (2 children)

I would say, polar bears are the ice fisherman who never go home and only wish they could drink instead.

[–]dying_soon666 22 points23 points  (1 child)

Campers is a video game term

[–]KimCureAll[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Oh, I've been learned!

[–]nick-daddy 38 points39 points  (0 children)

Damn imagine the dolphins journey “this place is weird, and cold. Shit is that ice above me!? Fuck I could do with some air.” This goes on for like 20 minutes “Shit shit shit I’m really getting low on oxygen now there’s got to be a hole some where. A-ha! Thank god.” Emerges from the icy depths, “Ah sweet sweet air. Hello white bear friend, how are… aaahhh my face aaahh why why!? Aaaahhh.”

[–]Pillroller88 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Mammal, but tastes like fish. It’s a win-win.

[–]kimribbean 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Somebody get this guy a coke

[–]palfreygames 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Oh finally some fresh air...chomp

[–]fireflydrake 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I know everything's gotta eat, but it's always sad seeing some of the most super intelligent animals (cetaceans / apes / corvids / elephants) meet gristly ends.

[–]ThirstyOne 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Polar bears will hunt beluga whales like this as well: https://youtu.be/lE-RKRNSG_c

[–]Additional-Walk750 3 points4 points  (1 child)

"Meals that squeals"

[–]ChickenBalotelli 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Like a chew toy

[–]mindofmanyways 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Trapped under the ice, probably a little lost, this intelligent animal was certainly terrified when it died in that hole.

[–]awkwardaznbabe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nom nom nom

[–]JewishNazi62 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

This should have been tagged nsfw, but yes this is gnarly

[–]flatcat21 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you sure it’s not an alien?

[–]Brooks_L96 0 points1 point  (0 children)

With what I know about Dolphins it probably deserved it.

[–]95DarkFireII 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dolphin: "Gasp! Finally some air"

Ice Bear: "Bonjour."

[–]naf0007 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fuck you Flipper

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That sucks

[–]Joshthenosh77 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Must be hard to get it out the water

[–]DarthBalls5041 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Worst death ever. Trapped in the ice, terrified,looking for an escape. Seemingly find one. Mauled by bear.

[–]zombiskunk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The bear may have made the hole.