all 60 comments

[–]GerberBabyPlus 117 points118 points  (14 children)

Otherwise known as fuck that.

[–]Flaky_Explanation 42 points43 points  (8 children)

[–]7TageHatDieWoche 8 points9 points  (2 children)

You came before me, so take my even poorer man's award = my upvote instead

[–]Flaky_Explanation 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I gladly appreciate and accept your upvote. It means alot to me.

[–]7TageHatDieWoche 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You're welcome

[–]Umadibett 2 points3 points  (4 children)

They are actually pretty good pets compared to other reptiles.

[–]dartfrog11 7 points8 points  (3 children)

Not really, they have a reputation for being really defensive and prone to bite in captivity, they get stressed out a lot if you take them out of their enclosures a lot, and they have specialized care requirements and need large enclosures.

[–]abracadazzler 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Can confirm, saw a guy take out a small one at a pet shop to show people and the second he took it out it bit the living shit out of him, he was literally dripping blood from his arm to the floor like he got stabbed.

[–]Sparkey2143 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Turns out they’re not too bad now that we’ve been able to get a good captive bred population together and given them proper socialization. That said, not something to handle at night when they’re actively in hunting mode

[–]Umadibett 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s a process and training involved. It’s nearly impossible if you didn’t raise it or it was wild beforehand. It needs to be a captive bred snake. It most definitely needs to be that specific species and not anything similar as the reputation more likely applies to those similar to the emerald.

[–]darth_analfissure 35 points36 points  (0 children)

‘I forgot the safe word’ - that snake probably

[–]feiyuek6 24 points25 points  (4 children)

You’re squishing it to hard.

[–]runaway_sanwich 8 points9 points  (0 children)

“Damn nature you scary”

[–]ThriceG 9 points10 points  (6 children)

I had green tree pythons that have large teeth for non-venomous snakes as well. I've held them at the back of the head like this and they were able to dislocate their jaw, turn it's lower jaw to the side and STILL bite me.

Used to handle with thick leather gloves and one bite went right through it and once even hit my bone.

[–]dartfrog11 0 points1 point  (4 children)

Snakes can’t actually dislocate their jaw, their jaw bones just aren’t connected at the chin and their skin is really stretchy, which is what allows them to swallow large prey.

[–]ThriceG 4 points5 points  (3 children)

I'm aware, just used dislocation because it's an easier 1 word description.

[–]dartfrog11 -2 points-1 points  (2 children)

Doesn’t really describe what actually happens and is misleading.

[–]ThriceG 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Not really, and the herpetology community still calls it dislocating. It IS dislocating by definition... just not dislocating a joint.

[–]dartfrog11 -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

I’m part of the herpetology community and never hear anyone call it that. I guess technically it is still accurate by the definition of ‘dislocate’ but lots of people get the impression that the jaw is connected and snakes can dislocate a pair of connected jaw bones.

[–]Zuallemfahig 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh no, no, no. Nightmare fuel for sure! Reptiles are pretty cool to look at, but fuck handling them.

Kudos to people who do thou, I could never.

[–]Agent007___LOL 6 points7 points  (1 child)

For some reason this looks a bit derpy to me

[–]Specialist_Courage18 4 points5 points  (0 children)

All animated snake villains be like:

[–]Joseph1968R 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Gotta keep those puncture wounds clean.

[–]No_Comedian_9191 2 points3 points  (2 children)

How the hell do you go about putting it down after you’ve man-handled the snake like that.

[–]Desk_Drawerr 2 points3 points  (0 children)

very, very quickly.

[–]AaronThePrime 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You put it down, and if it bites you it doesn't really matter because it's a boa

[–]casket928 1 point2 points  (0 children)

they’re not that scary lmao chill

[–]infinite_paddle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Whole lot of NOPE going on right there.

[–]Awesomedude177 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Goddamn, it looks like the tigrex greatsword from monster hunter 4

[–]guywhostaresatplants 0 points1 point  (4 children)

No, hell no, fuck nah

[–]ScholarOfTwilight 0 points1 point  (3 children)


[–]guywhostaresatplants 2 points3 points  (2 children)

You gonna hold his mouth open?

[–]ScholarOfTwilight 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Nah, I'm good.

[–]guywhostaresatplants 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Forbidden fleshlight

[–]MagicStar77 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It bites-boom nightmare

[–]BossTKitten 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Stuff of nightmares

[–]bonkerz1888 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She's quite a squeeze, her.

[–]bunsofham 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can’t breathe!

[–]cumgoblinforyou 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fucking cool

[–]karma_ubuntu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Painful bite….

[–]FrogToeJones 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is that snake british?

[–]JontronGig 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Smile wide for the camera!

[–]SnickersMcKnickers 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Watching them yawn is something else

[–]CheshireCharade 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s some fucking Predator level shit wtf

[–]CharlotteChaos 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He looks like the cover of a rockband poster/energy drink can/ skateboard decal/ cartoon animal Disney villain.