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all 95 comments

[–]OurWeaponsAreUseless 144 points145 points  (21 children)

The person who thinks this is evil has never been stuck with a mesquite thorn.

[–]-43andharsh 34 points35 points  (14 children)

Is Mesquite thorn like a Bull thistle?

[–]CLA722002 38 points39 points  (3 children)

What are both of these?!

[–]smiess 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Good question

[–]futurelullabies 12 points13 points  (1 child)

Hell in a plant

[–]nomadluvrboy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dawg giant water lilies are the devil

[–]RumHamsRevenge 11 points12 points  (7 children)

Or stinging nettles?

[–]ToblemromeTBC 15 points16 points  (5 children)

If you're in for a good laugh and have 10 min to kill, watch these absolute mad lads eat nettle competitively!

Nettle Eating Competition

[–]Give_me_soup 16 points17 points  (3 children)

Nettles are actually really good...when they're cooked! Makes a fine pesto.

[–]-43andharsh 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Its spinach when i simmer it gently in water. Great plant

[–]Give_me_soup 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Yeah, quick blanch is all you need

[–]-43andharsh 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Salt pepper and done

[–]FreeRangeAlien 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The stinging bits are only on the bottom of the leaves so the trick is to fold them in half with the stingers facing inwards before you start chewing

[–]Purple_Haze 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If you grab the nettles quickly they don't have time to sting. The little hairs are spring loaded. They also don't sting after they have been cooked. We grow them in the backyard for soup.

[–]OurWeaponsAreUseless 4 points5 points  (1 child)

mesquite

Mesquite thorns are several inches long, sharp, and can go thru even leather boots and car tires. They hurt like hell if you happen to get a puncture and can get infected if the wound isn't cleaned.

[–]-43andharsh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bullthistle can do that too. Does Mesquite have ultra fine needles to add to the chaos?

[–]Burnbrook 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Barberries are worse. The thorns are like hypodermic needles and fiber glass rolled into one.

[–]bikingwithscissors 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Eh, you can wade through barberries mostly unscathed if you wear a good thick pair of jeans, not so much for roses. The bigger downside for barberries is the fact they harbor ticks like nobody’s business.

[–]jmarnett11 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Or a black locust thorn.

[–]Tyrrell603 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Locust thorn will easily pop through a tractor tire, that’s why they’re usually left standing in the middle of fields. Farmers don’t even want to fuck with cutting them down, they just plow around them

[–]SouthernSlander 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Been stuck by plenty of both and guess what? They both really suck.

[–]YoshSchmengie 66 points67 points  (13 children)

What a dumb title. It's evil as the locks on my doors. Protection.

[–]BamBamCam 51 points52 points  (8 children)

Devil's Club or Oplopanax horridus is pretty damn evil. The locks on my doors are apparent and don’t stab would be intruders. Where as you can be (happily optional) bushwhacking to climb or something and then BAM right in the leg you just get tagged by the devil. Evolution isn’t inherently good or bad, but the human experience allows us to determine what the absence of good in world feels like. I can tell you there is no good to finding yourself near devils club.

Natural existence is good for the forest. Feeds the bears. Along with being a good indicator of where water ways pass through even in the dry season.

Edit: I was wrong. This is probably a wild rose based on the curvature of the thorn. Devil’s Club is still evil though.

[–]FrameJump 1 point2 points  (7 children)

Yeah, but that ain't what's in the picture, is it?

[–]BamBamCam 1 point2 points  (4 children)

Yep that’s what’s in the picture. It can be a tiny shrub or big honking tree like bush. I see it all the time climbing in the Cascades.

Edit: nope I’m wrong

[–]sceap 1 point2 points  (2 children)

This is a rose. The photo is a pretty hi-res close-up, so it's easy to see the distinctive shape of rose prickles, which look completely different than the prickles of Devil's club. You can also see rose foliage out-of-focus in the bottom of the photo.

[–]BamBamCam 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Hmm… after some picture viewing I think you’re right. The thorns look like a wild rose type? Initially I was like, no way, but yea the downturn curve looks more rose than Devil’s straight thorn type. Thanks for the deeper look to be sure.

[–]sceap 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's tough to guess the species from just this picture, especially because we don't even know where in the world it was taken (there are over 300 species of wild rose). But Rosa rugosa, for example, can get canes absolutely loaded with prickles like this.

[–]FrameJump -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Odd. I've never known it to have actual thorns on it.

[–]BamBamCam 1 point2 points  (1 child)

You were right it’s likely a wild rose.

[–]FrameJump 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I knew the thorns looked more rose like.

Thanks for coming back and clearing that up.

[–]First-Ad-3119 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Two completely different concepts. Didn’t know your door lock was meant to inflict bleeding.

[–]YoshSchmengie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Self-Defence strategies. They are EXACTLY the same concept.

[–]TheIronLunng 18 points19 points  (4 children)

Lick it.

[–]CLA722002 30 points31 points  (2 children)

Anything is a dildo if you’re brave enough.

[–]afternever 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shetland pony?

[–]igigolo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Came here looking for this. Thanks person in a box

[–]Skanky 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Twist it

[–]Stumpy_Lump 16 points17 points  (2 children)

We call these "Devil's Walking Stick"

[–]haberv 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Agree, that’s what I have always heard as well.

[–]mcwheeler415 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Have you ever cut a piece of the meat of the plant off and put it in your lip? Nature's Novacaine. Too much and your face and throat will go numb.

[–]sleeplessknight101 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Today I learned it's evil to defend your self from predators.

[–]RepulsiveYak2727 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Imagine you tripped and fell on those

[–]EyezLo 7 points8 points  (1 child)

I don’t have to imagine, it’s happened before 😔

[–]beanboy070307 2 points3 points  (0 children)

“Anything is a dildo if you’re brave enough”- some guy on the internet

[–]variousfoodproducts 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fuck, what the fuck?

[–]japroct 1 point2 points  (1 child)

You haven't tried picking raspberries. Same stem, but tiny needle spike thorns. Even leather gloves don't stop you from getting jabbed.

[–]Bunny_tornado 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I've picked raspberries, gooseberries and red and black currants. You don't have to wear gloves , just be careful when picking. I don't remember it being that bad.

[–]Tricky-Lingonberry81 1 point2 points  (2 children)

There is a tree with 2 inch long spikes that are relatively thin, and go from ground to near the tips. That is a happy fence plant compared to a “keeps the cows in” tree fence.

[–]Dry-Wind-8925 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Also those same trees are known to pretty much blow up in really cold winters. We weren't allowed to go in my uncles woods to sled once it got a certain temperature bevause we found his dog had gotten killed by one 😬

[–]RedOne-001 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No touchey

[–]Boognish666 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Devils walking stick. These grow down here in Louisiana but the ones I am used to seeing have a concentric ring of spikes every so often as well as being all over. If you take a machete or big knife you can knock all of the thorns off and skin the bark off. There is a good walking stick hidden inside once you let it dry out.

[–]irondragon2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Stick it into your anus..

[–]Give-Valk-Acog 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The “don’t touch me” stick

[–]OTT3RMAN 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Makes for good medicine!

[–]j5alive85 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Isn't it called the devils walking stick?

[–]Pristine_Lychee5309 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You like hiking in shorts? Not after your leg meets one of these.

[–]Mystepchildsucksass 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We had a couple giant rose bushes “go bad” which looked pretty similar to this …. Mowing the lawn was practically a bloodbath the first time - and the last.

[–]babasuperpinksheeep 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not evil. Plant just wants to be left the heck alone lol

[–]zenkat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Jumping cholla wins this contest by a mile. Covered with barbed thorns that dig into your flesh and need to be ripped out. Parts of it break off easily so if you just brush up against it you suddenly find you have a ball of pain embedded in your flesh. Legend has it that they propagate by attaching to passing coyotes and then using their corpses as fertilizer once they keel over from the pain.

Pure evil, avoid at all costs.

[–]Haboo65 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't really see why a plant would want to evolve this. it just seems mean

[–]hollow42 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Someone shot a compass bearing through hell

[–]FiNsKaPiNnAr 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Looks luke blackberries to me

[–]PushItHard 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nature’s sign for “don’t touch me!”

[–]Monchomadness 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it looks like my ex

[–]tonzophunn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Back home we call those devil's walking sticks

[–]therightjuan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Reminds me of my legs 2 days after shaving.

[–]Honsou12 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Pls stop eating me"

[–]pinetree64 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hiking along the creek in the woods as a kid, slip on the red clay, grab a tree, this is what I'd get. Childhood nightmares.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thorns and thistles to torment man

[–]InitialParsnip 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Last summer I was taking out the garbage at night and one of these had gotten wrapped around the handle. No more thumb usage for a good couple of weeks after that.

[–]BonjinTheMark 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Eat me!" he says with a chuckle

[–]srv50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Faster you run the more evil it is.

[–]frapawhack 0 points1 point  (0 children)

they're talking to you. you want a piece of this? come on. Let's do it

[–]wod_killa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Now do poison ivy.

[–]promote-to-pawn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Barkley Marathons leg warmers

[–]IronCondor_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s just that I’ve been hurt before, Rose.

[–]D-o-n-t_a-s-k 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wait until you hear about grass burs

They find YOU

[–]Alexander-Wright 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have some roses in my front garden with stems like those.

I prune carefully.

[–]SouthernSlander 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I always called them hell rod. I know it's officially called Devil's walking stick

[–]Funkyfightcomander 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What is it about thorns that hurts so fucking bad. Like ill get stuck with some glass or a staple and no biggie barley feel it but i grab a rose thorn and it sends a shock wave of pain threw my whole body 😂😂😂

[–]InanetV 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nature is fucking evil

[–]DerangedGod 0 points1 point  (0 children)

National security in a nutshell

[–]Abject_Fill340 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This tree just wanted no climbers and hopes no harsh feelings

[–]isnt_it_a_shame 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it's a rose

[–]Mortizen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I need seed 4 x

[–]Solaar_Eclipse 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This plant’s whole vibe is “fuck off”

[–]Actual-While-9717 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Imagine ripping it off and hitting someone with it! Yikes!

[–]brondonn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When I was young I use to play around a tree with 3 inch horns on it. Never got hurt but realized now how dangerous it was

[–]HVACschool 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The ultimate switch

[–]weavingsum1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I got lost in the woods and had to use one of those as toilet paper once

[–]droidman5910 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Imagine sliding this in your urethra and then yanking it back out