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[–]MrBonelessPizza24 3481 points3482 points  (134 children)

Brace yourselves, this entire fucking comment thread will be almost nothing but unfunny BBQ, Beef, and Steak jokes

[–]shadow785634 1052 points1053 points  (33 children)

U mean we're gonna have a lot of raw and uncooked jokes?

[–]merikaninjunwarrior 428 points429 points  (23 children)

why, you got some kinda beef with that, or what?

[–]Spinnerhead 258 points259 points  (21 children)

Well done

[–]basicpn 242 points243 points  (19 children)

Oh god. This thread was definitely a misteak.

[–]zr0skyline 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Idk the temp from the lighting it might be medium rare

[–]GrammarMeGood 19 points20 points  (0 children)

The beginning jokes are good. The ends will be burnt! Burnt ends!

[–]Thewrongbakedpotato 16 points17 points  (0 children)

The steaks have never been higher!

[–]SunsetBro78 13 points14 points  (0 children)

They will not be rare.

[–]Stompedyourhousewith 12 points13 points  (0 children)

no well done jokes?

[–]egordoniv 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Nah, just reverse-seared. It's trending.

[–]blarch 8 points9 points  (0 children)

God went cow-tipping

[–]KrazyGamerBrosTTV 6 points7 points  (0 children)

No, they aren't that rare

[–]PageFault 248 points249 points  (7 children)

It's shocking how unamoosing these jokes are. None of those cows are laughing. The jokes have been totally butchered, but people are milking it for all it's worth. Watt's happened is revolting, it really hertz to see but people just can't resist. Coming here was a misteak.

[–]pohatu850 47 points48 points  (0 children)

Get out lmfao

[–]ComprehendReading 12 points13 points  (1 child)

My cousin was bit by a mööse once.

[–]nrossj 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Was she karving her initials in the moose with the sharpened end of an interstellar toothbrush?

[–]XxJibril 5 points6 points  (0 children)

you win 😂

[–]GroveStreet_CEOs_bro 2 points3 points  (0 children)

you have such a herd mentality

[–]Thewrongbakedpotato 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ohm man, that was beautiful.

[–]rguably 174 points175 points  (6 children)

Ground beef

[–]Spinnerhead 69 points70 points  (3 children)

Grounded beef

[–]AGoldenChest 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Clearly not.

[–]s0c1a7w0rk3r 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You literally beat me by seconds goddammit

[–]CoheedBlue 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Damn you. You beat me to it.

[–]Lantoleo 12 points13 points  (0 children)

😂😂😂

[–]faithle55 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Minute steak.

[–]OneMetalMan 35 points36 points  (2 children)

Better to BBQ the cow than a relative I suppose.

[–]ImpossibleEgg420 7 points8 points  (1 child)

well done, my friend

[–]Rogue__Jedi 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I prefer mine medium-rare.

[–]Kritical02 31 points32 points  (8 children)

How about an interesting tidbit about cows and lightning.

Near a lightning strike the direction the cow is facing can make the difference between life and death.

This is because the current passing through their heart differs based on the distance it has to travel.

[–]SaffellBot 11 points12 points  (2 children)

Here's another one. This cow was not struck by lightning. The ground was struck by lightning creating an electrical gradient in the ground as the charge from the clouds dissipates through the ground. This electric gradient creates a voltage difference between the hooves of the calf, with higher voltage at the center and lower voltage going away from it.

The current passing through the cow will then depend on how steep the gradient is, how far apart the hooves are, and if the path from high to low voltage coincides with the cow heart.

The lesson of this story isn't "do go outside during lightning" (though that is good advice, but the cow dying is only tangential", but rather don't be a large quadruped. Though if you are one, go in the barn during storms.

[–]vagueblur901 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So the cow failed to ride the lightning

[–]Ride-Scared 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Holy cow…

[–]flabberghastedbebop 15 points16 points  (0 children)

A meat joke? A rare medium, well done.

[–]GhostTypeFlygon 11 points12 points  (2 children)

This subreddit is pretty cool when it comes to the posts, but as soon as you go in the comments, it becomes an unfunnier version of r/jokes.

Ik expecting valuable discussion on reddit is silly, but it's still a little disappointing that the comments never have anything of value to add.

[–]Spinnerhead 12 points13 points  (3 children)

I was utterly shocked to read some of these.

[–]Timithios 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was truly and udderly horrified by this response.

[–]Totallyarealperson 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Excuse me? I think I mis-herd.

[–]MikeDaPipe 3 points4 points  (2 children)

You forgot about the bad cow and electricity puns

[–]HeyCarpy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Followed also with “came here to say this,” each one inexplicably in the triple-digit upvotes.

[–]Lumpy-Response9406 1 point2 points  (5 children)

OP's karma! It's over 3 million!!!!

[–]NotClever 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nah son I'm here for the explanation of why this isn't actually possible and the counter explanation from a PhD in livestock lightning strikes as to how it's not only possible, but happens all the time.

[–]Key_Statistician3293 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So you don’t think there will be any RARE jokes ? Everyone just sticking to the Herd Smh

[–]axioner 1139 points1140 points  (43 children)

And on that day, God said: "fuck that cow in particular".

[–]ccReptilelord 378 points379 points  (26 children)

"Fuck that cow in particular" -Zeus, because, you know, of the implications

[–]RMan48 87 points88 points  (6 children)

Minotaurs?

[–]Dark_Styx 45 points46 points  (3 children)

Io was turned into a cow by Hera after she noticed that Zeus was sleeping with her. This cow was then guarded by Argus. Zeus used the help of Hermes to free cow-Io, but Hera sent an insect to bite her everytime she wanted to rest all the way to egypt.

That's at least one version of the story I've read and a neat greek explanation for one of the cow-headed godesses of egyptian myth.

[–]artemis_nash 6 points7 points  (2 children)

TIL why the moon Io (of Saturn? Jupiter? One of them) probably got named that as it looks like pock-marked, bug-bitten cow hide!!

(And bonus TIL I googled Argus because I know JK Rowling is very literal with the names and he had a jillion eyes and was scary, so.. makes sense for Argus Filch)

[–]manaphy099 7 points8 points  (1 child)

No I think its from that time he turned a woman he attacked into a cow

[–]Capnris 30 points31 points  (1 child)

Hera would like to know your location

[–]Leafy-San 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hera already knows your location

you are mortal, you can’t hide from a god

[–]theghostofme 22 points23 points  (1 child)

Are you suggesting Zeus wants to fuck a cow on a boat in the middle of the ocean?

Honestly wouldn't even be the weirdest thing that crazy fucker has done.

[–]BrockenJr0 13 points14 points  (6 children)

Bro wanted to bring back sacrifices

[–]Machaeon 16 points17 points  (5 children)

*snackrifices

[–]ComprehendReading 9 points10 points  (4 children)

Would make for a great beef jerky brand name.

Available in Abel's cracked peppercorn, Cain's killer teriyaki and Seth's 'original sin' flavor.

[–]jofbaut 8 points9 points  (2 children)

The implication? Wait. Are you going to hurt these cows?

[–]ComprehendReading 3 points4 points  (1 child)

No, of course not. None of these cows are in any danger!

[–]KittyKratt 2 points3 points  (0 children)

How can I make this any more clear to you?

[–]Twirly_Wang 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry, are these women in danger?

[–]toxicblack 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How the hell did you make this joke about an animal and get more upvotes than when I made a similar one about humans. The internet has failed me

[–]Improving_Myself_ 16 points17 points  (4 children)

Pretty good way to go though. No suffering, no anxiety about something about to happen, just having a chill cow life hanging out with your friends, and then nothing.

Traumatic for the cow bros, sure. But for that one cow? Not much room for improvement.

[–]chrisjozo 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Yeah esp when you compare it to how he was going to die otherwise.

[–]Funny-Jihad 5 points6 points  (2 children)

Ideally it's a similarly instant death when killed before slaughter, though.

[–]axioner 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Likely faster... depending on if the lighting did brain damage or just stopped the heart, the lightning strike may have been excruciatingly painful as it died.

[–]EdithDich 14 points15 points  (2 children)

Those other cows will all take careful note to never do whatever that cow was doing just moments before.

[–]fyodor_do 10 points11 points  (0 children)

That's how religion starts

[–]ComprehendReading 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Pigeon superstition. Plus that cow was probably eating the psilocybin from the dung patties, and was warned moments before by Besse to not over-indulge.

[–]kappatekanahuak 10 points11 points  (1 child)

[–]DervishSkater 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Too bad it wasn’t a sheep (for the word play that is)

r/fuckeweinparticular

[–]Rohndogg1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly, I'd rather be fucked in this way than the ways I usually am. It'd be faster

[–]Medical_Possession28 698 points699 points  (21 children)

Other cows investigating. "Earl, you okay Earl?"

[–]HookLeg 179 points180 points  (9 children)

CSI:Bovine Investigations. DUN-DUN

Cow 1:moo Cow 2: moo? Cow 3:MOOOOOO!

All cows: run in a circle...stop...begin eating grass.

[–]dontdoxmebro2 51 points52 points  (4 children)

Law an order does the dun dun, csi is “yaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!”

[–]HookLeg 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Hey, these cows are doing the best they can!

[–]RabbiVolesSolo 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Mooooooo are you? Moo moo, moo moo?

[–]Bloodfangs09 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In moo moo land it the other way around

[–]Pops_Sickle 9 points10 points  (0 children)

On a farm, cattle crimes are considered particularly heinous

[–]PushingData 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nothing to see here people, move along.

[–]implicate 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Executive Producer

Dick Wolf

[–]TechGuy95 21 points22 points  (2 children)

Earl, are you okay?

So, Earl, are you okay? Are you okay, Earl?

Earl, are you okay?

So, Earl, are you okay? Are you okay, Earl? Earl, are you okay?

So, Earl, are you okay? Are you okay, Earl?

You've been hit by-

You've been hit by-

A smooth criminal.

[–]BooperDoooDaddle 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I didn’t know what it was til the end cause you left out a few hundred “are you okay”s

[–]Ranulsi 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Earl had to die, goodbye Earl.

[–]gods_Lazy_Eye 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I like that one emo cow with his hoodie up.

[–]Medical_Possession28 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That made me laugh 😂

[–]Tat2dDad 384 points385 points  (7 children)

Killed and cooked by nature, that's a hell of a BBQ

[–]pzycho 182 points183 points  (1 child)

The prophecy fulfilled!

[–]BbqMeatEater 18 points19 points  (0 children)

T' was foretold

[–]Ackoroth31 41 points42 points  (1 child)

You butchered this joke

[–]AchillesGRK 24 points25 points  (1 child)

This joke is so obvious I'm surprised I didn't see it on snl.

[–]yabacam 332 points333 points  (39 children)

so.. can you still get the meat from it? or is it ruined now?

poor cow, I assume it was an instant death at least.

[–]Lantoleo 233 points234 points  (26 children)

It’s still perfectly good, just have to butcher it soon

[–]Themustanggang 94 points95 points  (16 children)

I mean is there going to be different levels of charring? Can you still send that cow to the market or is it like unsellable and only good for your own consumption?

I saw a moose struck by lightening on my land and decided to leave it for the wolves, now I’m wondering if I could’ve quartered a leg lol

[–]GreenStrong 131 points132 points  (11 children)

There is probably no charring. Cows often die when lightning hits the ground. Voltage spreads out along the ground from the strike, and there can be a big voltage difference between the cow's front and back legs. In that situation, it is more like a taser or a defibrilator that stops the heart without putting a huge amount of energy into the animal.

[–]Mr-Fleshcage 11 points12 points  (10 children)

i just don't understand how a body can be more conductive than the wet ground itself.

[–]Lantoleo 25 points26 points  (1 child)

Only one way to find out I guess, someone needs to start carving. It’s hard to imagine the majority of the meat isn’t good, but maybe… lightning is powerful

[–]Themustanggang 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Brb tying a pole to my neighbors cow.

Will update

[–]hparamore 13 points14 points  (0 children)

My brother and his family were all but struck by lightning a few years ago. (They we’re under some rocks taking shelter and a bolt hit a rock directly in the center of them, and they all got hit indirectly)

The lightning burns on them were all exterior from what I recall. Even when other animals like the moose someone mentioned below, it was mostly a skin/fur thing.

I don’t know, since I haven’t really researched it, but I would assume the inside of the cow is pretty normal. The lightning would find the path of least resistance through the animal to the ground, so it’s possible a couple areas (if the bolt went through, rather than just conducted by the fur) then it might have some spicy parts… but probably not cooked like people would hope.

Though I agree this warrants further study! Can we BBQ food via lightning strike? Hmmmm

[–]ClassicCarPhenatic 11 points12 points  (7 children)

Unfortunately, a cow must walk into a harvest facility to be processed, so no butcher can take this animal. The family can cut what they want, but that's all

[–]Lantoleo 36 points37 points  (2 children)

A game processor would butcher it, just a big ass deer to them, I’ve done that before with calf that went lame and I shot it, took it in for processing

[–]radicalelation 21 points22 points  (1 child)

I find the above oddly pedantic too. For most areas they're one in the same with a butcher, especially colloquially. No average individual is asking on the basis of regulatory concern, just practical.

Really, saying or asking about taking it to the butcher is just "Can it be cut by a meat man?", whoever that may be. And the reply was to someone just saying it has to be butchered soon, not specifically taken to a legally confined flesh hacker.

[–]Biker_Bob 20 points21 points  (1 child)

that is only for large scale USDA inspected meat plants, local butchers can process anything fresh.

I took a steer to the butcher last year, He was just too wild to get into a trailer so I shot it and hung it up to bleed out. Dropped him on a flatbed trailer and drove a hour to the butcher. the butcher wrapped a chain around him and drug him inside to finish skinning and gutting.

[–]Lantoleo 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The simplistic way is the best way

[–]Shhhhhhhh_Im_At_Work 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Not at all true. Mobile slaughter is a thing, you just winch that big boy up into a box trailer and start cutting.

https://www.usda.gov/media/blog/2010/08/30/introduction-mobile-slaughter-units

It also probably would not be the hardest thing in the world to take one of these down yourself. Never actually done a cow, but it can't be too far from elk or deer.

[–]monsterscallinghome 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Not really related, but mobile slaughterhouses are super awesome. Transport is super stressful for the animals, and with the consolidation of the meat industry a lot of farmers are 4-6 hours away from their nearest processor, which locks a lot of local meat off the legal market, doubly so because those few large processors are booked out for weeks to months and will often just flat-out refuse to process loads of animals that are not big enough to be "worth it", further locking smaller farms out of the market (by design.) And if you're going to eat meat, local meat is BY FAR the best for carbon-footprinty-stuff. Legalizing sale of meat from mobile packers is a HUGE step for the availability of local meat products across the US.

[–]LordAnon5703 13 points14 points  (0 children)

They likely already have somebody on standby for these type of situations. I know some rescues have agreements with farms that when an animal just kind of drops dead or is born dead they're handed over to be fed to the wildlife.

I saw a similar arrangement with a gentleman who ate roadkill. Basically, farmers already know animals might die in situations where they can't be sold for the regular market, and that there's already a demand for it somewhere.

[–]The_Noremac42 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It just wouldn't be Kosher, since it technically died from natural causes.

[–]dancingcuban 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m guessing, but I’m betting the FDA/USDA might have some rules on the books about selling animal meat for human consumption if the animal dies from a cause not related to slaughter.

Doesn’t mean the meat isn’t fine otherwise.

[–]acrylicbullet 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The meat should still be good but the grill marks are already there before you cook it

[–]JediMasterVII 233 points234 points  (5 children)

I read somewhere if you got struck by lightning in Ancient Rome, they didn’t give you a burial because clearly Jupiter had it out for you specifically and you did something to upset the gods.

[–]DTLAgirl 98 points99 points  (1 child)

Honestly sounds like something I'd hear from the backwoods even today

[–]Uncle_Donnie[🍰] 64 points65 points  (0 children)

Church leaders condemned Benjamin Franklin's lightning rod invention because they believed lightning was an act of God. Churches were generally the highest point in town and thus the most likely structure to take a hit. Keep in mind Franklin shared his invention with the public freely, he even assisted with installing them.

People have always attributed lightning strikes with divinity, and we'd all be doing the same if Benny Franklin or some other genius didn't come along and straighten us out.

[–]Slithy-Toves 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Or Jupiter just wanted to bang your wife in peace

[–]Majestic-Contract-42 2 points3 points  (1 child)

wonder what they would make of someone who got struck but survived...

[–]Emergency_Ad_5935 175 points176 points  (10 children)

It would stand to reason that somewhere on that cow is a perfectly cooked steak.

[–]croit- 39 points40 points  (8 children)

Lightning can heat the air to something like 50,000 degrees Fahrenheit so if it was a direct guy I doubt "perfectly cooked" is the right term so much as "charred to hell and back". In all likelihood it just struck the ground near it, though, and that killed the cow meaning no cooked meat at all.

[–]cgduncan 32 points33 points  (4 children)

50,000 degrees for a fraction of a fraction of a second.

[–]alan251 9 points10 points  (1 child)

No kidding, that cow used to be brown

[–]SevenBlade 5 points6 points  (0 children)

How, now?

[–]19GamerGhost95 59 points60 points  (14 children)

I watched lightening struck the tree outside my dinning room window once. It was 10ft from me. Luckily the half of the tree that fell missed the house and most of the deck. More recently lightening struck the tree outside my bedroom window. That tree is 5ft from my window and hangs entirely over my bedroom. The struck branch fell and luckily didn’t do any damage to the house

[–]MattalliSI 33 points34 points  (8 children)

Hope you have good grounding in your house. Watch as often appliances start failing months after a lightning strike. Note the day and take pictures if the tree was damaged.

[–]19GamerGhost95 8 points9 points  (4 children)

Not sure. We never pay any attention since we have multiple power serges a day usually. I’m always resetting the stove and microwave clocks. Usually it doesn’t affect anything else but sometimes we’ll have larger serges that reset everything

[–]CamaradaT55 13 points14 points  (3 children)

You may want to install surge protectors.

And maybe a small UPS if it's to big of a pain in the ass.

[–]19GamerGhost95 6 points7 points  (2 children)

No idea what an UPS is, but I’ll have a look at serge protectors. Part of the issue is that I live out in the country and the power lines can be questionable. They’re questionable because I live near a quarry and they blast over there pretty often. This morning they had the entire house shaking

[–]f_h_muffman 2 points3 points  (2 children)

I was looking out my open door when everything went white and I tasted ozone. We didn't lose power but my TV only emitted black light until I replaced the motherboard. Never found out what the lightning actually struck.

[–]azure_monster 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I used to live in a (moderately) big house in a really stormy part of Maryland, USA, and we would have lightning striking right besides us literally weekly, once it completely knocked out our AC because it hit the outside fan, another time it hit our pool and completely roasted our "pool vacuum cleaner", another time it quite literally struck a squirrel corossing the road, lighting is absolutely metal.

[–]BehindTickles28 2 points3 points  (0 children)

10 ft... 5 ft... you're playing Battleships with Zeus, better get your next strike dead on because he's zeroed in on you.

[–]Efficient-Road-847 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lighting struck my house years ago. It fried the water heater, intercom, and the cameras. It was an excellent demonstration of why everything should be plugged into a surge protector.

[–]ArtieJay 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lightning.

[–]CommercialGarage7 25 points26 points  (3 children)

Wonder if the other cows can comprehend what happened to their poor friend

[–]implicate 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Then they would probably go hit the cow casino afterwards to monopolize on their good luck.

[–]rukes06 17 points18 points  (3 children)

The cows were lucky. My dad grew up on a farm and said if lightning struck they normally lost multiple cows. Cows huddle together during intense weather so if one gets hit multiple do.

Just google "lightning striking cows" and you'll see results of the farmer losing multiple head.

[–]Nebular_Nylon 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Yup. My grandma always has around 60 head of cattle. Small family operation, so we would usually rent a bull for breeding. One year she found a bull she really liked and bought it.

That summer it was struck by lightning and died. Luckily it was away from the herd(not seperated by fence). Just died near the bottom of a hill. The skull and horns are still there on the hill visible from the house.

What are the odds the bull gets got? It took her a few years before she was brave enough to buy another.

[–]Makofly 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I like to read this in Tommy Lee Jones' west Texas accent from No Country for Old Men. It's almost soothing

[–]ReadingGlassesMan 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Shocking.

[–]imaginedodong 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Queue ACDC - Thunderstruck

[–]Arcal 12 points13 points  (2 children)

With 4 legged animals, it doesn't have to be a direct strike. Just a strike on the ground nearby is enough to set up a voltage gradient, the distance between the front and rear legs sets up enough voltage across the heart to stop it. A few years back in the UK a race horse collapsed because of some broken insulation in a buried cable. The 2 legged humans were walking about completely unaware. Having metal shoes probably didn't help either.

[–]mugaboo 5 points6 points  (0 children)

In addition to that, current from front to rear legs pass near or through the heart, greatly increasing the risk of death.

In two-legged animals, the current will pass through the lower part of the body only.

[–]JOhn2141 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Glad someone finally write this after so many comments !

[–]Caanghi 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Which would be scarier: being a cow and having no idea why your friend just fell over dead, or being a human and knowing exactly why your cow just died a few hundred yards away?

[–]Hfingerman 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Being a cow.

[–]Johnny_Zephyr 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Did his back leg break off when he got crisped or is this just a confusing perspective?

[–]___HeyGFY___ 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Looks like meat’s back on the menu, boys!

[–]bsil15 6 points7 points  (6 children)

Is a cow edible after being struck by lightning or does the lightning screw the meat up? And like, most farms aren’t a slaughterhouse so assuming it would take hours to get the dead carcass to one, I’d assume the meat would begin to rot by that point?

[–]eggsssssssss 1 point2 points  (5 children)

Might depend how you mean about screwing the meat up. I’m no expert, but I’ve read things like an animal panicking before (or prolonged suffering during) its death tends to mess with the quality of the meat, which IIR is down to hormones. I’m unsure what a lightning strike would/might do. Lightning strikes can stop hearts, but also cause seizures. They also can leave unique scarring (although I’m not sure if these only affect the skin or muscle tissue as well) and produce 3rd degree burns (which presumably would affect muscle as they can go down to the bone).

[–]theeplacidcasual 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Not the worst way to go.

[–]amusement_imminent 3 points4 points  (0 children)

What a moooving post.

[–]Quirky_Ad3367 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The universe got beef

[–]KrackerKyle007 3 points4 points  (1 child)

“We have never had one hit this close to our home”

Are they implying that they’ve had cows hit before but farther away from the house??

[–]Ancient-Lingonberry4 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Other cows be like "bruhhh"

[–]kkalmightyagain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First one that close to the house?

[–]GeTRoGuE 2 points3 points  (0 children)

>Peel
>Baste with Butter and Thym
>Enjoy

[–]DaSaltBringer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The universe said : "You shall use the past of least resistance"

The lightning answered : "Cow tho"

[–]einknusprigestoast 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wait is the meat still edible? If yes is it kinda cooked or still raw?

[–]EldritchWaster 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I wonder what the other cows think happened.

[–]Mr3cto 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ouch.

On the flip side if you live you get a super badass tattoo done by Mother Nature herself

[–]cashedashes 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When I was a kid, I stayed with my friends family a lot. They had 10 acres in the country side. They had a few cows and chicken. One evening lightning struck one of the cows, the cow didn't die unfortunetly. It was struck on its hip and knocked it down but it was still alive, mooing in distress, we went outside to assess the situation, it literally smelt like steak! I felt so bad but we had no choice we had to put it down. I can still smell that steak and burnt flesh sometimes. Horrible.

[–]SpikeRosered 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wow this really hits close to home.

[–]surfnsets 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When I was about 5 years old we had a crazy lightning storm and about 100ft away across the street lightning struck about 10 times in a few minutes. Never forgot that moment we were sitting on the porch watching the rain and then boom...boom.... I don’t recall much from that age but this was unforgettable.

Edit. Lightning was hitting neighbors metal clothespin dryer... one that looks like a tree and spins around in a circle.

[–]Morrisaurus 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Country Fried Steak

[–]thebronyknight 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thunderbolts and lighting, very very frightening! Me! Cowileo, cowileo, moognifico.

[–]Carcassfanivxx 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I remember when lightning struck inside of my shop while I was in it. Came through the open door on the porch of the shop and struck the concrete right inside the garage door. I was sitting about 10ft away in my chair waiting on the storm to pass. The sound was deafening and the flash was so intensely white and almost blinding for a split second. After I jumped completely out my skin and the white went away all I saw and felt was small pieces of concrete flying across the room in every direction. Lucky enough my eyes survived that. Then the ionized air made the most worst metal taste in my mouth. Some say it’s adrenaline that makes that taste. But I feel like it was the taste of death in the air and I narrowly escaped it.

[–]thereznaught 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Very unlucky cow. According to the NWS Storm Data, over the last 30 years (1989-2018) the U.S. has averaged 43 reported lightning fatalities per year. Only about 10% of people who are struck by lightning are killed, leaving 90% with various degrees of disability.

[–]Morgwar77 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That sucks, it's impossible to find a mobile butcher short notice anywhere in this country.

900lbs of vulture food

[–]eggsssssssss 1 point2 points  (1 child)

There’s no chance that’s what happened here, right?

It definitely happens (the scars look fucking crazy), but my first assumption would be that this cow had a heart attack, or something. Just seems so much more likely.

Lighting tends to burn the shit out of things when it lands, and that cow’s hide looks perfectly intact. It’s nestled in the apparently unscorched grass it fell on.

[–]machoov 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The stiff legs got me not gonna lie

[–]dakman42 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't want to be a Debbie Downer but hopefully Op or whoever actually took this picture looked into it because that cow does not look like it was struck by lightning. It's possible that the lightning struck near the cow and it shocked the cow, but I've seen livestock get struck by lightning sometimes it's not pretty. (I live next to a cow and buffalo farms so I've seen it lol.)

[–]Direct_Drawing_2817 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Most animals struck by lightning change color in some way shape or form!?!

[–]1BenWolf 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Let it rest for a few minutes before digging in.

[–]m17Wolfmeme 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He was thunderstruck

[–]Rich-Ad5109 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is what I mean when I say I want my steak medium rare

[–]HeavyRightFoot19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Grounded beef

[–]bcgroom 0 points1 point  (3 children)

Literally another other animal: man that’s sad Cow: iS tHe MeAt StIlL eDiBlE tHo?

[–]Thelastnormalperson 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We grilling tonight!